A/N: As always thanks to Bria for the Beta. This is the last chapter and I hope everyone likes it :)

Wishing on Stars: Part 3

They were in the library studying together not a week later, the smell of ink permeating their nostrils, and the subtle shifts of pages turning serving as background noise while they worked.

In these moments, in quiet moments when they simply basked in being in one another's presence (with all their clothes still firmly on their bodies) he became John to her again; no flirtation, no darkened gaze, no teasing. Just John: her slightly geeky best friend. The thought hurt more than John liked to admit, so more often than not he'd ignore it altogether. Still he couldn't help wondering how they could be so intimate with each other in one moment and so platonic again the next. It messed with his senses, threw him off balance when he was around her, even though she seemed to be taking everything in such stride. It convinced him that Donna had to be wrong in her assumption that Rose felt anything more for him. Still he envied the way she seemed to be able to detach herself so fully from what they were doing.

John sighed, drumming his fingers absently on the table, not even trying to pretend anymore that he was actually studying. There was no use, not when his eyes kept drifting to her, taking in the graceful slope of her neck, the way her hair was beginning to curl at its nape due to the humidity, the way she was chewing distractingly on the soft, supple skin of her bottom lip. An action he was looking forward to repeating the next time they met up. At this thought John forced his eyes away, cursing himself for being so besotted, for the beginning curling tendrils of arousal that were weaving erratic patterns in the vicinity of his stomach.

Suddenly there was a thud, and John startled from his thoughts and looked over to where Rose's head had just crashed dramatically into her open book, a noise of frustration passing from her lips, a noise that unwittingly had his mind racing to all the other times he'd heard such a similar sound issue from her in a distinctly different setting...

John shook his head, forcefully banishing the thought. "Maybe we should call it a day on the studying," he suggested, proud of the way his voice didn't falter over the words.

"Hmm, good idea. I don't think reading the same sentence over and over again is really doing much good for me at this point."

John grinned. "Well, you know, full of good ideas, me."

"Full of yourself more like it," she quipped.

John smirked, opening his mouth with a ready retort, before promptly closing it again, thinking better of his words. She might've told him once that their arrangement didn't come with rules, but nevertheless there was the unspoken rule of never discussing anything related to their deal outside the bedroom.

There was an awkward pause as Rose seemed to pick up on the path his mind had just taken. John coughed and weakly said, "So, want to head out then."

She was already packing up her things, haphazardly shoving lofty textbooks into her bag before slinging it over her shoulders. "Yeah, definitely."

"Cool, yeah, umm, why don't we go and get..." John trailed off, the end of his sentence burning his tongue, demanding release from his mouth. But nervousness gripped him too tightly. He'd never been the one to suggest going to get chips since their arrangement had started. It seemed that another one of their not-rules was that she made the decisions when it came to anything relating to their deal. It had been her idea after all and it seemed only right somehow that she set the pace for it. John didn't want to in any way make her uncomfortable and subsequently drive her away. Not when things already felt so precarious.

"Get what?" Rose asked curiously. John opened his mouth, just about ready to spit the word out, despite his doubts, when a booming voice suddenly echoed across the otherwise quiet room.

"Rosie!"

At the sound of the voice, a giant smile bloomed across Rose's face and she looked up delightedly at the handsome man that was making his way towards their table at a brisk pace.

"Jack!" she greeted back, jumping up so she could fling her arms around his neck. Jack's own arms snaked around her waist, lifting her high up off the ground so he could swing her around. She giggled as he set her back down, her cheeks flushed and eyes warm and happy. John felt something tighten uncomfortably in his stomach as he watched.

"How've you been gorgeous?" The man asked before turning curious eyes on him, a lascivious smile lighting up his face. "And who's your friend?"

"Oh!" Rose said, glancing over to him. "John this is my friend Jack, Jack this is my...umm, this is John." At her stumbling words, John felt his stomach tighten even further.

"Hello," the grinning man said, holding out his hand. "I'm Jack Harkness."

John reluctantly took the hand, trying to tamp down on his sudden nausea. "John Noble."

"Nice to meet you," Jack practically leered.

John shifted awkwardly on his feet. "And you."

Everyone knew of Jack and John was no exception to this. The other man's reputation as a shameless lothario often made him the topic of much gossip around campus. He flirted with nearly everyone, men and women alike, and his bed-post was filled with notches as the rumors went. But...but John'd had no idea that the other man was apparently good friends with Rose.

John's unease only grew more as he watched them interact, the way Jack flirted heavily with her, laying the charm on thick. Granted, the other man was flirting with him as well, but it still made his blood boil to watch the way he leered at her, the way he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, the way he so easily dropped a dazzling array of compliments right at her feet when John himself couldn't even express to her how beautiful he thought she was when he was divesting of her clothing, scared to cross any forbidden lines. What was worse though was the natural way she flirted back with him; touching her tongue between her teeth, laughing at his jokes and blushing heavily at his innuendos. It made John jealous right down to his bones, made doubts start brewing in the back of his mind, made pounding anger flow through his veins. Because that was his smile, that should be her laughing at his jokes, that should be...

Nothing. He had no claim over her, despite what the fading bruise on her inner thigh might say. He had no right to be jealous.

John focused on calming his breathing.

"-just remember," Jack was saying as John tuned back in to the ending of their conversation, "my offer still stands." The he winked and was sauntering off, but not before leaning down to give Rose a light peck right on the lips.

John felt something in himself snap. He growled, a primal instinct building up deep inside of him that he couldn't seem to restrain. In a sudden burst, he had Rose's hand firmly ensconced in his and he was dragging her from the library.

"John, John where are we-" she trailed off as he reached his destination, an abandoned cupboard. He dragged her firmly inside, closing the door and bathing the room in darkness. Then he pounced. Lips clashed together in an awkward fumble, the darkness and cramped space making it difficult to coordinate their limbs. John blindly reached out a hand in the darkness, coming in contact with a chain that hung from the wall and promptly pulled it in order to cast a dim glow on the room. With the added light they were able to untangle themselves and come together again, lips crashing to lips and bodies pressed firmly together.

John raked his hands down her side, all the while devouring her mouth and fancying that he could completely erase the other man's taste from her lips. She matched his ardor, one hand coming up to yank at his hair and scratch along his scalp, her other slipping immediately down to palm at his growing erection.

John broke the kiss just as he felt himself going light-headed from lack of oxygen. When he met Rose's eyes, ragged breaths being torn from his throat, he noticed the way her head was tilted slightly to the side as if she were seeing him for the first time, her gaze questioning and troubled.

"Doctor," Rose finally said, nearly as out of breath as him. "What's going-"

"John. Say John," he hissed, before bringing his lips back down to hers. Despite his command he didn't give her a chance to speak again, his tongue diving quickly into her mouth, moving insistently against hers.

Raw. He felt so raw and so tired, his emotions threatening to strangle him. Couldn't she see what she was doing to him, what she was reducing him to? Couldn't she see how in love with her he was? Was he not disgustingly obvious about it?

John trembled, emotions moving through him and bubbling over like hot lava. His hands met the clasp of her jeans, spurred on by some unnamed motivation, one that made no sense to his jumbled thoughts. He pushed the fabric down her legs, taking her knickers with it. She stepped out of the fabric, her eyes unreadable as she did. He worked on his own trousers, shoving them and his pants down his legs in quick jerks, not bothering to step fully out of them, instead moving his hands to her bum and urging her upwards.

Rose took the hint, bracing her arms on his shoulders and jumping up so that her legs were wrapped tightly around his waist, her back against the small space of wall behind her. They fumbled for another moment, working to arrange themselves properly so that they were lined up. Then he was sinking into her, the feeling of her wet walls surrounding him pulling a long moan from his lips. Then he jolted.

"Shit," he said, feeling mortification heat up his face. "Condom. Forgot a condom. Oh god." Her nails were digging into his shoulders, her inner muscles squeezing him tightly and the thought of pulling away was unthinkable.

"'S fine. On the pill. Have been for a while, just like the, ah, extra precaution. But it's fine." Her eyes darkened and she met his, that look that he couldn't even begin to understand back in her eyes. "Now fuck me, John."

At the sound of his name falling from his lips, her tongue curling around the word in the most wonderful of ways, John felt any and all control snap. His lips parted in a groan, his eyes fell shut, and his hips began rocking forward.

Maneuvering was difficult. He'd never had sex against a wall before and he found that not two minutes in and his arms were already burning, sweat beading on his skin in exertion making it very difficult to keep a solid grip under her bum. Rose seemed to be too far gone to notice the increasing trembling of his limbs. One of her hands was pressed against the wall providing extra support, the other was lost between her legs, rubbing furiously at her clit. She was making small choked sounds in the back of her throat, but otherwise was uncharacteristically silent as he worked his cock deeper and deeper inside of her, hoping he could get them both there before all hope of staying completely upright was lost.

Then Rose suddenly keened, her whole body going rigid as she convulsed. John scrabbled to keep his grip on her, burying himself deeply to the root and holding her firmly in place as she rode out her orgasm. She didn't cry out as she usually might, but the intensity of it was written all over her face, her lips moving, forming a word over and over, though no sound came out.

His name, he realized, with a sudden burst of arousal so shocking and lightening hot that it tipped him right over the edge, the orgasm ripping through him and buckling his legs.

They crashed to the floor in a tangled, heaving lump. Pleasant aftershock still pulsing through his cock, masking the painful landing. Rose was winded, the air having been knocked out of her lungs, but for the most part she seemed to be alright, her face still conveying rapt pleasure.

It took them a moment for their heads to clear enough for them to begin working on disentangling their limbs. When they were both up again, pants and trousers rightfully sorted John grabbed Rose into a fierce hug, burying his face into the side of her neck. Rose hugged him back just as tightly, a shaky sigh leaving her lips as she comfortingly stroked the back of his neck.

"I'm sorry about the name thing," she finally said after a moment in a small voice. "I thought you liked Doctor. I thought...I thought you were getting off on it."

John felt himself freeze, felt the emotions crashing into him in waves, felt words clawing up in his throat, choking him. Angry words and accusations, confessions and apologies, they struggled in equal measures to move past his lips. Donna's words were playing in his ears to just tell her.

"That's not..." he finally settled on, "that's not the point! The point is that I'm in- that I l-" John shut his mouth with a click, pulling back from her, putting much needed distance between their bodies. He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head, throat not working. He looked at her helplessly.

Then turned and left.

He was sitting in his room atop his bed, surrounded by the remaining stars from his ceiling, when she came to see him. She shuffled into his room, nervously playing with the zip of her hoodie, and met his eyes. He looked away, back to the comforter, back to his stars. He heard the door click as his roommate, the one who'd let Rose inside in the first place, quietly slipped out. Mickey had always been a good bloke.

"Hey," Rose said softly, breaking the silence.

"Hey." His voice broke over the word.

She cleared her throat, opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, before she could berate him for his behavior, before she could reject him, before she could do any of the other number of things he had spent the last few hours imagining, John cut her off.

"I'm sorry," he said, still refusing to meet her eyes.

There was a pause.

"What for?"

John scoffed under his breath, a self-deprecating laugh bubbling up from his lips. The better question would be what wasn't he sorry for.

Rose's face screwed up in a scowl. "No, seriously John," he flinched, "what do you think you have to be sorry for in this situation?"

John's eyes stared somewhere over her shoulder. "I've made a mess of things and after you said you weren't looking for anything complicated...I...I shouldn't have agreed to this. I thought I could handle it, but I really can't, Rose. I'm sorry." He still wasn't looking up at her.

Rose moved closer, coming to sit on his bed with him in order to take his hand. "John, what's going on? Was this about Jack, because he-"

At this John finally looked up to her, his eye boring into hers. He shook his head and brought a hand up to cup her cheek. He steeled his nerves, calmed his breathing, closed his eyes and surged forward so that their mouths met, giving his explanation in the only way he could think to do when his words were failing him so tremendously.

He'd kissed her many times by now, knew his way around her mouth, but this kiss was vastly different to any of those. This was what John had been longing for, not the desperate snogging with sloppy tongues and groping hands that had preluded a majority of their encounters (although those kisses were obviously quite brilliant as well), but the loving press of skin to skin. Gentle, chaste, and tender, lips brushing lips and emotions being translated by the soft rhythmic movements of their mouths. It was short, sweet, just long enough for him to get his point across. When he pulled back he leaned his forehead on hers, his thumb gently stroking across her cheek and small puffs of air from his nose being released against her skin.

There was no way she could have misinterpreted that, John decided, reluctantly moving away, his vision cast downwards again and his hand running through his hair. Just to make sure, however, he cleared his throat. "I just...I can't do casual, Rose. Not anymore. Not...not with you."

Rose's hand came up to touch her lips. "John-"

"And I just...I realized that if that's all you want, something casual, I can't be that person. Not when I- Jack, though, he seemed like he'd be a good, umm, candidate I suppose for, you know, something like..." John made a gesture.

Rose's face had transformed during his rambling, the features alighting with understanding and something else that he couldn't identify. She was hesitantly smiling, however, a smile that was doing funny things to his insides. "Rose?"

Her smile grew wider and she moved closer to him, a hand coming to rest on his thigh. "The problem with that plan is that I don't want Jack. I want you."

John looked pained. "I told you Rose, I can't-"

"Shh," Rose said gently. "Just listen for a second. I want you. I've always wanted you."

John's heart skipped a beat at her words. He gaped at her, trying not to let the hope rise too rapidly. A question grew in his eyes.

She answered it by kissing him. A kiss that mirrored the one he'd just given her, gentle and loving, her finger stroking along his sideburn, her lips moving in tandem with his. When she pulled back, her breathing was heavier, and in a breathless voice she said, a touch of guilt creeping into her words, "I thought this," she gestured between them, "this thing we started would help to get it out of my system because, like I said before, you never seemed interested in anyone so I just...I assumed you weren't interested in me."

John looked at her incredulously. "Rose, the reason you've never seen me interested in anyone else is because it was you who I couldn't get out of my head. I thought-I thought it was all rather obvious."

"Not really," Rose said, shrugging. "You can be a closed book at times, John." She picked up his hand again, brushing her thumb along the back of it. "I just always thought you didn't feel the same. That's why...I thought if I was with you, at least once, that I'd get over it, as it were." A shadow crossed her face. "Plus I wasn't lying when I said I didn't want to get hurt again and you...you have the power to hurt me much worse than Jimmy ever could. I realized rather quickly however I wasn't going to just get over my feelings for you." Rose looked away. "It was a stupid idea in the first place, what I did. I should have ended it, I knew I should have but I couldn't bring myself to. So then, I needed some way not to lose myself too completely in what we were doing. That's where the Doctor thing came in. I didn't mean to hurt you with that. With any of this." Rose bit her lip. "I didn't want to get hurt but instead I ended up hurting you. I'm...I'm so sorry, John."

John cupped both her cheeks, brushing his thumb along the apples. He felt hurt, of course he did, and also a little betrayed. But hadn't he, in a way, done the same thing to her? Used her (at least he thought he was using her) in order to get what he wanted? In that case both of them shared a bit of the blame and it was likely to take a bit of time before either of them could fully trust each other again. Mostly, however, John just felt elated that he would no longer have to hold his feelings back.

"It's okay, Rose. I agreed to it after all, even knowing how in love with you I was. I let it get out of hand, too."

Rose was looking up at him speechless, her eyes gaining a glassy sheen as she whispered, "You're in love with me?"

John squeezed her hand then sheepishly, he admitted, "Since day one."

"Oh, John," Rose sighed, moving forward and wrapping her arms around his neck to drag him down so that they were lying across his bed together, face to face. "We've been so thick."

"Yeah," John said, snaking his arms around her waist and pulling her closer, burying his face into the side of her neck. "We have." Then in a small voice, "You know I would never do anything to hurt you, Rose. Don't you?"

"I do," Rose said letting out a contented sigh. There was a moment's silence before Rose spoke up again, "This is nice. I could get used to this." She burrowed further into his embrace and John smiled, his eyes crinkling.

"I always wanted you to stay afterwards so we could have a cuddle," he admitted. "Too scared to ask, though. Didn't seem like something people in our, erm, situation would do."

"Still, we have all the time in the world now, I suppose." John made a happy hum in the back of his throat, and then gently skimmed his nose along her cheeks until his lips had found hers again. There was no rush as they kissed, just their lips coming together over and over.

When they slowly broke apart, Rose moved her lips against the shell of his ear and whispered, "I love you too, by the way." John's stomach flipped at the unexpected words and he felt warmth fill him up, chasing away any lingering doubts or guilt.

"You know," John said. "I have a confession to make too."

"And what is that then?"

John's cheeks tinted just the slightest bit pink. "I was getting off on the whole Doctor thing. I...I wouldn't be opposed to more of it, although, not every time."

Rose looked up to him. "Yeah? You're not just saying that?"

"Not at all," he said huskily.

Rose beamed at him, but then her eyes just as quickly furrowed and in a lightning fast movement she pulled one of the plastic stars out from under her with a quizzical look. "Right, I was gonna ask earlier...What did you take these down for?"

John coughed, embarrassed. "Just...well, didn't really think that they were doing me doing me much good. Not when I first got back here at least, not after...Luckily you set me straight rather quickly."

Rose grinned slyly and slung a leg over his hips, suddenly straddling him. She leaned over him and whispered huskily, "Then how about after I make all your wishes come true, Doctor, we can work on hanging those stars back up together." She nipped at his ear.

Most of the stars ended up going missing, caught in the whirlwind of their passion as they were, but John decided that he liked the stars that she caused to burst behind his eyelids much better anyway.