Kayla looked down at her sleeping daughter and softly stroked her head. It never ceased to amaze her that this tiny, wonderful, sweet little girl was hers. Her daughter was a living, breathing symbol of the love she and Steve shared.
Moving from the crib, Kayla sat down in the rocking chair. Since her firing from the lab a week ago, things had been a little tense in the Johnson household. Steve had been extra attentive and Kayla knew he was trying to make up for what had happened.
The problem was that it could not be changed. Kayla knew that. In truth, she had accepted it and was enjoying working full-time at the Trauma Center.
Starting up the lab had been a welcome and needed distraction in the aftermath of losing Steve. It had given her a project to focus and had challenged her professionally. But the reality was that, once the lab was up and running, it had hardly been exciting work. She was not a researcher by training and, while she enjoyed participating in the lab when she could, the administrative work that took up most of her time had soon become routine.
So, if she were honest with herself, she did not really miss working at the lab. Her continued anger and frustration came not from losing her job, but from the way it had been lost.
She shook her head slightly as she thought of Steve breaking into the lab. It had been a risky and illegal and 100% Steve. She had fallen in love with the man knowing exactly who he was and had never wanted to change him. But his actions sometimes still left her frustrated beyond measure.
Kayla understood why Steve had broken into the lab. It was the same reason she had told Steve about Carly's project. Lawrence Alamain was a very dangerous man, and there was little question that the toxin he was working on was destined for Salem. When your family was a likely target, it was hard to sit back and wait for the attack to come.
No, it was not Steve's motivations she questioned, just his methods. Quietly, she got up from the rocking chair. She hated the tension between them, and it was time to put it behind them. Thanksgiving was just two days away, and she wanted the holiday to be a time of love and family.
Leaving Stephanie's room, she started for the living room then stopped when she heard the sound of Steve's voice coming from their bedroom. Turning back in that direction, she idly wondered who he was talking to on the phone. As she drew closer, Steve's words became clear.
"So you're sure we don't know anybody working in that port?" Steve asked. There was a pause and then he said, "No, it's not essential, but it would be a hell of a lot easier if had somebody who knew their way around the place."
What place? Kayla wondered silently. What is he talking about?"
"I know you did your best, Tony. I'd still be running blind if you hadn't found out about those trips to Maur . . . Mauritius or whatever it's called."
Kayla's blood ran cold at Steve's words. She still did not know exactly what he was talking about, but she was sure it had something to do with Alamain.
"I appreciate all your help, dude. I'll just have to figure that one out when I get there." Steve's words confirmed Kayla's suspicions. He was planning to go after Lawrence.
"Thanks, man. I'll need it."
With those final words, Steve hung up the phone. Kayla took two steps forward and entered the room, her anger boiling over.
"Planning a trip somewhere, Steve?"
Steve's head whipped around in response to Kayla's voice. His face registered his surprise - and his guilt. He stared at her for a moment, then finally spoke. "What makes you say that, Sweetness?"
Kayla just shook her head. "Don't even try to lie to me, Steve Johnson." Before he could react, she walked quickly to the bed and pulled the map he was holding from his hand. Glancing at it, she could see the island of Mauritius circled.
"I guess this is where you are going, huh?" she asked angrily, throwing the map back on the bed. "When were you planning on telling me? Or were you just going to disappear one of these days?"
"I wouldn't do that, Kayla," Steve said calmly.
"Really?" Kayla scoffed. "It seems like you prefer keeping me in the dark these days." She stared intently at him. "When were you going to tell me you decided to go after Lawrence?"
"I was going to tell you when I had my plans figured out," Steve finally said, shifting his gaze to the floor.
"So you didn't think that taking off halfway around the world and walking into a psychopath's nest was worth discussing with your wife before you made the decision." Kayla's anger was pouring out of her. "Are you that unhappy with me? Are you that desperate to leave me and Stephanie again?"
Steve looked up quickly, his eye widened in shock. "What are you talking about? I don't want to leave you and Stephanie at all?"
"You could have fooled me." Kayla's anger was replaced by hurt. "You've only been back a few months, and the first chance you get, you want to put yourself right back in the clutches of that madman. What am I supposed to believe?"
"Baby," Steve began, a pleading note in his voice. "That's not it at all." He ran his hand over his face and adjusted his patch. "This guy is torturing people in order to perfect some kind of poison that he's then going to unleash on this town. We both know that. How can I sit back and just wait for that to happen?"
Kayla turned away, trying to gain control over her churning emotions. She understood his need to protect his family, but she would never understand his willingness to engage in a suicide mission. She just did not know how to make him understand that was what going after Lawrence would be.
"Sweetness," Steve spoke softly. "Please believe me. I wouldn't be doing it this way if I had any other choice."
Kayla spun back around at Steve's words. "You do have a choice, Steve. You can stay here with Stephanie and me. We need you. Don't you understand that?"
"I won't be gone that long, baby." Steve offered her a small smile. "I'm just going to go down there and-"
"And what?" Kayla interrupted. "Invade Lawrence's new facility on your own?" She stared at him. "It took a Special Forces unit to rescue you from that compound in Egypt. But you're just going to waltz in and do the same thing on your own?"
Steve turned away. "I can't sit here and do nothing." His voice was quiet, but serious. "I know what those people are going through and they don't have the cavalry coming to rescue them."
Kayla reached for Steve's arm and turned him back to look at her. "I know what is happening to the people in that compound and it's horrible. And I know you want to help them." She sighed. "But you going off on your own and getting killed or captured is not going to help them. Can't you see that?"
"I'm not going to get caught," Steve insisted. "I can take care of myself."
Kayla's frustration boiled over again. "Like you did when that bomb went off on that boat? Or when the doctor poisoned your IV? Or when you were Lawrence's prisoner the first time?" Her voice grew harsh. "It's a suicide mission and you know it."
Steve stared at her for a moment. "I thought you had a little more faith in me than that, baby."
"Don't," Kayla said angrily, shaking her head. "Don't turn this back on me. I've always supported you and you know it. I supported your decision to go undercover to help Marcus. I supported your decision to join the Salem PD. When everything in me told me that the Riverfront Raider case was dangerous, I put aside my fears for you." Kayla could feel the tears beginning to roll down her face. "And you know what that got me? I got to watch you die in that hospital room. I got to plan your funeral. And I got to try to explain to your daughter why her daddy wasn't coming home again."
Steve did not respond, so Kayla continued. "Maybe this makes me selfish. Maybe if I were a better person I would understand why you want to sacrifice yourself for people you don't even know. All I know is that I don't think I could survive losing you again and I don't know what to do or say to make you understand that."
"You're not selfish, Kayla," Steve finally said. "You're the most unselfish person I've ever known. The last thing I want to do is hurt you again."
"Then don't go after Lawrence like this, Steve," Kayla pleaded. "Tell me you'll stay here with me and Stephanie."
Before Steve could respond, a cry came from down the hall. They stared at each other for a moment, knowing that nothing had been fully resolved. Finally, Kayla nodded at Steve. "Go. Go get your daughter. If I can't convince you to stay, maybe she can."
Steve dropped his gaze to the floor and walked out of their bedroom. A few seconds later, Kayla heard the soft murmurs as he comforted a crying Stephanie. Sinking to the bed, Kayla offered a silent prayer that something she had said had gotten through to Steve. She sighed heavily. So much for a peaceful and happy Thanksgiving.