So this was supposed to be an author's note regarding two reviews I read that were posted a few days ago, but somehow they got deleted so I won't keep you guys waiting for the next chapter! But I will say this: I really appreciate all the great reviews I've been getting from both users and guests! You guys have no idea how much you make me smile! But I will say this: if you don't like a chapter please don't post a bad review, cause that just brings me down. I'm least likely to finish this story if I get bad reviews if there are some grammar or spelling mistakes then that's my bitch computer's fault because I use it to check for any spelling or grammar mistakes I may have made before I post anything. Please don't comment any mistakes I may have made in some chapters because that's just being something I like to call a smartass. Thank you and here's the next chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Chapter 9: Breaking Away

Two months crawl by, and I feel further away from everyone than I ever have. And spending my days sitting in my apartment and walking aimlessly around the Bureau hasn't been any help.

I know that it's my fault that my closest friends are either dead or not speaking to me. I could've done something to stop that from happening, but I didn't. Selfish.

The bump in my stomach continues to grow, to the point where if I look down, I can't see my toes anymore and walking becomes more difficult.

I go to the doctor's as often as I can, because even though most of what I loved as slipped away from me, this child hasn't. I'd like to keep it that way.

The doctor tells me that the baby is fine, and continues to grow at a healthy rate. Usually I don't ask for an ultra sound picture, but this time, I do.

I clutch it tight in my fist as I walk out of the infirmary, and don't loosen my grip until I enter my apartment. I lean against the door and press the picture against my cheek as a tear makes it way out of the corner of my eye.

I think of what Tobias said to me after Caleb died. About how he wouldn't let me go, as long as I didn't let go of him. But I let go of him, the night I told him that I was carrying Matthew's child. Somehow I feel as if I am still holding on to him, because I can't let go of him. I study the picture, relieved to discover that the important parts seem to be there. Head, two arms, two legs. I also can't let go of this baby.

Later that day, I go outside. Summer has brought dry air and humidity. But it has also brought an endless gleaming ray of sunshine and beautiful green grass. My mother was once told me that I was her sunshine on the darkest day. But she was mine. And that's why I'm here.

The walk has exhausted me, so I sit by the riverbank and stare at my reflection in the glistening water. Then I look up.

"What do I do mom?" I ask. The wind blows lightly in response. "I messed up. I've lost everything I've ever wanted in my life, including you, dad and Caleb." I look back down at the ground. "I don't even know who I am anymore" I whisper.

I wonder what my parents would think of me if they were here to see that I was pregnant. Would they even view me as their daughter anymore? When I chose Dauntless, it was something I chose to do with my own life. But getting pregnant has affected those who I love lives. Will they ever be able to forgive me? Will I ever be able to forgive myself?

So many questions, yet no answers lie ahead.

The walk back is even more exhausting, and by the time I'm at my apartment at the Bureau, I can barely stand.

I'm surprised to see Zeke and Shauna outside my door. They smile at me.

"What are you guys doing here?" I ask.

"Don't ask questions. Just come with us" Zeke says.

"Can it wait until tomorrow?" I ask, "I'm exhausted."

Zeke's grin disappears. "Well, aren't you good at ruining the happy mood" he says.

"Oh, come on, give her a break" Shauna says, "she's over seven months pregnant."

Shauna props herself up in her wheelchair. "This won't take long, we promise. Just come with us."

"And if you're really that tired, I'll carry you" Zeke says.

I laugh. "I'm not as light as I used to be" I say. "But it's fine, I can walk."

Zeke and Shauna lead me down to the strip of apartments that are being built just north of the river. They stop outside one of the doors on the first floor, facing the river.

"Matthew told us that you wanted one of these apartments" Zeke says.

How did Matthew know? I think. But instead I just nod. "Yeah" I say.

Shauna smiles and hands me a key. "This is for you" she says.

I smile, and use the key to unlock the door.

The apartment is much bigger than I imagined. It has a wide foyer with white tile floors. When I first walk in, to my left there is an empty room except for a couch pushed up against the wall. To my right, there is a kitchen with a table and a few chairs.

"Guys" I say. "It's amazing."

And it really is, considering how much room there is. I'll be much happier living here than in the Bureau.

"And that's not all" Shauna says, wheeling herself past me. "Come on!"

I follow her to the end of the hall, where there are two bedrooms. One of them had a queen sized bed and a dresser, with a bathroom connected to it. The other one contains a crib and a dresser.

"Baby's room" Zeke says. "We were going to paint the walls, but Matthew told us that you weren't sure if you were having a boy or girl."

"It's perfect" I say. "Thank you so much. I can't believe that you guys did all this for me."

Zeke and Shauna exchange a look. "We actually didn't really do any of this" Zeke says. "It was all Matthew. He just asked us to bring you here."

I stare at him in disbelief. "Matthew?" I ask.

Zeke nods. "He did everything. He picked out the apartment, he painted up some of the walls, and put in the furniture."

I continue to stare at him. "Where is Matthew? Why isn't he here?"

Zeke and Shauna share a look. "He thought you'd be uncomfortable with him here" Shauna says.

"Why would I be uncomfortable?" I say.

"I think he just feels guilty for everything's that's happened" Shauna says.

"He shouldn't" I say. And I mean it. This is my fault as much as it is his. We both made a mistake. I drove him away too. Yet he still found enough love for me to do this.

Zeke and Shauna eventually leave, and I sit on the edge of my bed. Matthew did all of this. Out of what? Guilt? Kindness? Love?

Maybe he did it for all three reasons. He cares about me. And this baby. His baby. I feel as if an empty spot in my heart just became whole again. It is a relief knowing that there are still people who are living that care about me.