A Light in the Dark

A/N: Sorry this took so long, I've been having a lot of health problems and have been in the hospital a lot. I've actually had the chapter written finally for some time then just needed to type it up. I've also kind of had a small problem. I've outlined the rest of my chapters for the story, what I want the chapters to include and where I want them to end, then I find out as I am writing the chapter that I am 16 pages in and not close to ending it where I wanted to. So, what ends up happening is my one chapter ends up being two chapters and that took me longer to figure out writing it.

As always I would like to throw a shout-out to my beta AlexSkywalker who is wonderful, patient, and everything a beta should be.

Please give me reviews, it helps me know what I need to do and what I need to stay away from. PLEASE REVIEW!

Chapter 16

Jason rushed to the side of the groaning Tim. The man was overjoyed to see two blue eyes open when he got there. Tim was looking everywhere, confused. It was evident the younger boy wasn't quite with it yet.

"Tim? Tim?" Jason called out his name repeatedly, concerned that Tim's eyes weren't looking at him. He felt hands on his shoulders pulling him back.

"Jason, give him some room man, just…..let me look at him ok? He's not quite here yet. Ok? Jason?" Roy kept shifting his face in front of Jason's who kept trying to look around Roy to see Tim. "Jason!"

"Yes! Fine! Ok! Go, go look at him," Jason said turning Roy around and shoving him towards the groaning youngster on the couch.

Roy sat down on the edge of the couch next to Tim's side. Tim groaned again; his eyes were still looking around but not as frantically.

"Tim? It's Roy Harper. You know me. It's ok." Roy put his hand on Tim's chest, partly to show he wasn't supposed to get up and partly as a comforting gesture. Tim's next groan turned into a whimper. "Ya, I know you're probably in some pain right now. I'll help you with that in just a minute but I need you to do a couple things for me first, okay?" Roy grabbed the flashlight pen and got close to Tim's eyes to check his pupils which, thankfully, responded normally. Tim, however, didn't like it and whimpered again, trying to turn his head away. Roy lightly took hold of his chin to turn his head back to him.

"I know, I know, buddy, I just need to see something." Tim then tried batting away the offending light with weak arms flailing everywhere. He was like a newborn, not quite in control of his limbs yet. Tim whimpered again and shut his eyes against the pain of the light.

"Tim, I just need you to follow the light for a few seconds then the light goes away, I promise. Now come on, look up." Tim looked up but squinted, following the light with his eyes, yet moving his head slightly. After a few seconds Tim shut his eyes whimpering. Tim then started testing his muscles, shifting around a bit, groaning and whimpering.

"What's wrong?" Jason asked from his distance.

"He's a bit confused I think, not quite with it, and he's in a bit of pain."

"Why's he in pain?"

"His muscles have atrophied, he probably has a headache from just having nutrients and his eyes aren't used to the light yet." Roy went back to Tim as the younger boy started to pull on the wires, IV, and oxygen tubing from his nose. Tim was starting to breathe fast and heavy. "Don't do that Tim, just calm down," Roy held Tim's hands down gently as it didn't take much strength to do so.

"Tim, calm down. I need you to slow down your breathing can you do that? Come on, the light is gone, open your eyes for me."

Tim opened his eyes slightly, still squinting from pain. Roy put his face in Tim's field of vision.

"Tim, listen to me, you've been sick, you've been asleep for a while. I know things are confusing, but you're in safe hands, okay? Can you say something? Anything?"

Tim looked around again as he croaked out a name. "Jason?"

The name sounded rough and harsh against unused vocal chords, but it uplifted Jason's spirits immediately. Roy turned around to see Jason already heading towards them and made room for him on the couch as he got Tim something for the pain. Jason sat down next to Tim, holding the boy's hands in his own so Tim wouldn't pull on anything. Tim was still being shifty and wiggly like he couldn't get comfortable.

"Hey there, I'm right here. What's wrong man?" Jason asked, concern flowing through his voice as well as his eyes.

"Hurts." Tim croaked again and shifted his head up, stretching his neck.

"Ya, I think Roy is getting you something for that. Uh…..here." Jason looked around picking up a water bottle and shook it in the direction of Roy who was filling up a syringe. Roy nodded at Jason.

"Not too much though, and not too fast." Jason nodded at Roy's instructions and gave Tim a couple of mouthfuls of water. Tim was trying to pull his hands away from Jason's and was looking around at all the equipment.

"Okay, Okay, but no pulling at anything, okay?" Jason said as he cautiously let go of Tim's small, frail hands. Tim gently touched the oxygen tubing across his face then shifted his arm to look at the IV. Tim tried weakly to pull up the blankets, looking underneath at the catheter. "Uh, yah, that was kind of necessary, sorry. But don't worry; like Roy said, you've been sick but you're going to be ok now." Jason was concerned at Tim's lack of talking.

Tim suddenly started to make a gagging noise. Roy put down the now full syringe and bottle, grabbing a trash can.

"Turn him on his side!" Roy commanded and Jason did as told just in time for Tim to dry heave into the trash can. No substance, just dry heaving. Tim rolled onto his back when he was finished. Jason wiped his face with a towel.

"It's alright Tim, that's normal, it's okay," Roy said handing Jason the water bottle. Jason gave Tim another drink of water and noticed tears coming from Tim's eyes.

"Tim? You okay?" Jason asked. Jason didn't know if the tears were from pain or from the vomiting.

"Ow." Was all Tim could produce. Roy then put the medicine filled syringe into Tim's IV.

"Tim, this is something to help with the pain, but it's going to make you a little sleepy. The most important thing is to rest right now, okay?" Roy said. Jason gave Roy a look as if he was insane and Roy just shook his head back at him.

"We're going to be right here Tim, okay? Just rest," Jason said reassuringly and waited until Tim finally shut his eyes against the medicine and his breathing evened out. Jason then stood and pulled Roy aside.

"Are you serious? You want him to sleep some more?! He's been out a week!" Jason yelled at Roy, his hands on Roy's arms, lightly shaking him as if to shake some sense into him.

"Jason, this is good. He woke up, he's followed some simple commands; that's actually better than I expected for his first time waking up. I told you he wasn't going to be just fine right away. Plus, he is in pain, I had to give him something for it. Would you rather he be awake and in pain?" Roy said, getting frustrated with Jason, yet understanding his position of concern. Jason let go of Roy's arms. He let his hands fall to his sides and his head hung down.

"No," Jason whispered just loud enough for Roy to hear him.

"Jason, he's going to be fine. He won't be asleep for another week, just another couple hours. Let the pain pass. He's going to be tired for a while here. Next time he wakes up I want to see if he can handle something light, like soup and if he can keep that down than I can start removing some of these bags off of the IV."

Jason just nodded his head from its sunken position. Roy patted Jason's arms.

"Why don't you go to the store and get some soup and broth and get some things Tim will like and enjoy while he is going to be down."

Jason left for the store and was surprised to see Tim awake when he got home. Tim looked to be deep in thought and obviously Jason had walked into a serious conversation. Jason was unloading groceries when Roy walked into the kitchen.

"I'll take care of this and make some soup. If he keeps this down I'll take him off some of the nutrients through his IV, see if he can stand and then take the catheter out tomorrow." Roy said, taking the groceries out of Jason's hands. Jason glanced once more at Tim. Tim was staring at his hands in his lap. His head was downcast and he was obviously deep in thought.

"What's going on?" Jason whispered to Roy, tilting his head to Tim.

"Why don't you go talk to him. Think he needs it."

Jason walked cautiously over to Tim with a confused looks on his face. He sat down on the floor next to the couch Tim lay on.

"How you feeling?"

"Tired, weak."

"What's going on? Something is going on in that big ass brain of yours, and obviously I walked in on something."

"I asked Roy why I was sick, how I got sick."

"And?"

"And basically I did this to myself, my own actions made me sick."

"He said that-" Jason started to stand up, only to be stopped by Tim's hand, light on his arm.

"Don't. He didn't put it in those words exactly, but it's true. I wasn't sleeping or eating and then…..this."

"Ya, I didn't know why you were doing what you were doing or how to get you to stop and we got in an argument and you passed out. That was a week ago."

"Roy said I scared you."

"I thought you were dead."

"I'm sorry."

"I had to call Roy because I didn't know what else to do without violating your trust and either me or someone else calling Dick, who knows I stole this medical equipment from the cave. But I lied and told him it was for someone else. But, uh, I think Dick might be starting to lose it over not having any contact with you for so long. But, that's you decision."

"Now what happens?"

"You get better. Talk to me. Tell me how I can help so you don't end up like this again. Because this….. it just isn't worth it. But you have a bit of a road ahead of you to get well according to Dr. Roy."

"When did you become such a sap?" Tim joked, trying to smile but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Let's just say I understand what you are going through. Feeling betrayed, replaced, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera."

Tim nodded and was looking sleepy again.

"Why don't you rest while Roy and I make dinner and some soup for you. If you keep it down you can get rid of half this crap. I got you some books and stuff for while you're down. Don't worry, we'll figure it out, okay."

Tim nodded and scooted down into the couch, getting more comfortable.

"Thanks Jason, for everything," Tim murmured as he dozed off.

"Sure kid," Jason whispered back, smoothing Tim's hair back.

The next morning brought successes and setbacks. Tim was keeping his light food of broth and ginger ale down so Roy took the nutrients off the IV stand but kept the fluids on as a precaution.

Roy had wanted to try Tim standing but there lay a setback. Sitting all the way up left Tim weak and dizzy and shot up his blood pressure. Orthostatic Roy called it, and said it was probably normal but set some things he wanted to try back a few days. This frustrated Tim.

Tim slept a lot. He slept through the nights, surprisingly not having any nightmares. Once is a while Jason thought he heard Tim moan or toss and turn, but whether that was out of pain and being uncomfortable or a nightmare, only Tim knew. Tim slept a lot during the day as well. When he wasn't sleeping he read the books Jason brought him or watched TV. Jason strictly forbid him from working the case about Bruce being alive and Jason even put Tim's laptop out of sight. Roy had also started physical therapy on Tim, which was what Jason was doing with him at the moment.

Jason sat at the end of the couch. His palms were pushing against the bottom of Tim's feet as Tim bent his knees towards his chest. Tim didn't like physical therapy, though he knew it was necessary. Tim also constantly bitched about the catheter making him uncomfortable. The boy's attitude lately had changed; he wasn't miserable or depressed. He was frustrated and angry. Of course, no one knew who Tim was frustrated or angry at.

"Are we done yet?" Tim growled.

"Almost, five more," Jason said, trying to ignore Tim's tone.

"Two more, you lost count."

"I did not, it's five."

"I'm done."

Jason grabbed Tim's ankles as he attempted to put his legs back under the comforter.

"Five. Now." Jason argued back.

Tim let his legs go limp and turned his head away from Jason's glare.

"I don't know what's gotten into you, Tim, but getting angry at us isn't going to help your situation. We are the ones trying to help you."

"I'm not angry at you," Tim muttered.

"What was that?" Jason asked.

"Nothing," Tim said as he turned on his side and closed his eyes. Jason let out a frustrated sigh and walked into the kitchen where he met Roy.

"Another outburst?" Roy predicted.

Jason nodded. "He's pissed and frustrated and I don't know why or what's worse."

"Chill, he's probably frustrated at his situation and angry at himself for putting himself there."

"Well, he better get over it."

"Did you?" Roy asked. Jason glared murder at Roy who put his hands up in mock surrender. "Look, tomorrow morning he will try standing and walking and the catheter comes out. Maybe that will make him happy." Roy's phone beeped and Roy rolled his eyes obviously frustrated.

"Ignoring someone?"

"Yah, Dick, he's been blowing up my phone wanting to talk to you since he can't find you patrolling. He is reaching out to me as friends again, probably because he has no one else. He doesn't sound good, Jason. You want to hear these voicemails?"

Jason just put up one hand silencing Roy and the other hand pinching the bridge of his nose feeling a headache coming on. It had been four days since Tim woke and Jason didn't know if things were better or worse than before he fell into his light coma.

The next morning Roy took out the catheter and Tim desperately wanted to go to the bathroom. They allowed Tim to slip on some loose shorts and had him sitting up. His blood pressure remained normal so they tried standing. Roy and Jason were on either side of Tim who insisted he didn't need this much babying. With one of Jason's hand holding Tim's and the man's other hand on his upper arm for support, Tim stood. He was shaky at first, but no nausea, dizziness, or blood pressure problems.

"Let's try walking to the front door, slowly," Roy said as he felt Tim pull to walk forward.

Tim took the shaky steps forward. His knees wobbled with each step he took and he leaned heavily on Jason and Roy, concerning Jason. It was obvious Tim could not walk on his own without the help and support of the two people at this side.

"Okay, okay, not bad Tim, how do you feel? Dizziness? Feel too tired or weak?" Roy asked.

"I'm fine; can we walk to the bathroom now?" Tim replied. It was obvious Tim was lying. Jason could hear his breathing labor and quicken just from walking the few steps to the doorway. Jason looked at Roy, a silent plea on his face to not let Tim do this. But Roy glared back at Jason as if to say 'Let him learn on his own.' Jason just wished Tim didn't have to learn at his own expense. Lately Tim was being his own worst enemy, which wasn't like him.

It seemed like it took forever to get to the bathroom. They helped deposit Tim on the toilet.

"We'll be right outside, just call when you're done." Jason said.

Tim nodded his head almost sarcastically and waved the two older men out of the bathroom.

"Yah, Yah," Tim muttered.

"I mean it Tim, do NOT get up without us helping you," Jason warned. Roy pulled Jason by the arm out of the doorway and closed the bathroom door. The two men walked to the bedroom doorway. Jason leaned against the doorway exhausted while Roy just stood there and stared at Jason almost smugly, arms crossed over his chest.

"What?" Jason asked.

"Just wondering how much longer you are going to fight Tim on this."

"Fight him? I'm trying to help him. I don't know why he is acting like this!"

"Would you be any different? Having to be babied, cared for, be weak in front of other people, needing to ask for help? It's no more in your nature than it is his. He is frustrated."

"So tell me, Dr. Phil what do I do?"

"Help him, don't fight him on every little thing. There are some things Tim is either going to learn 'I accept help or I fail'. He has to fight for himself, but right now he has no purpose to fight for. Think about it. All he has to fight to get better for is to live a life he doesn't want to live right now. No Robin, no friends, no family, no mentor. Think about that. The only way you can help him is to give him a reason and a purpose to fight for. Show him there is a light at the end of the tunnel sort of speak," Roy said.

Jason just stared at Roy. He quirked one eyebrow at him with a quizzical look. Jason then chuckled under his breath.

"What?" Roy asked. "It's okay, you can say it, I'm smart."

"I wouldn't have called you for help if you weren't smart," Jason replied. Roy smiled and ruffled Jason's hair. Just as Jason was about to swat Roy's hand away he heard the bathroom door open.

"What the-" Jason questioned. Jason turned to see Tim standing, barely, in the doorway of the bathroom gripping the doorframe. Tim was pale and shaking almost comically. With great effort, the boy raised his head to look at Jason. Tim's eyes rolled back in his head which Jason took as his cue and dove, literally to his knees as Tim fell forward. Jason caught him as he barely hit the ground. Jason gently rolled Tim over onto his back on the ground as Roy joined them on Tim's other side.

Tim was passed out cold. Jason patted Tim's cheeks lightly.

"Tim? Tim! Open your eyes buddy," Jason called as Roy checked his pulse.

"Pulse is fast and thread."

"Why the hell didn't he wait for us?" Jason asked.

"I told you: he's angry and trying to prove something."

Meanwhile in Tim's brain, he entered a dreamlike state. He wandered through a house resembling Wayne Manor dressed as Robin and as he entered each room, looking for someone, he only found death. In the first room he found Stephanie, one of his best friends, bloody and beaten in the middle of the otherwise empty room. He checked on her immediately, only for her to turn to dust and ash beneath his touch and the particles then blew away. The next two rooms went the same; Bart was in the next room, disappearing under his touch, and Connor in the next. After Connor disappeared, Tim began to sob.

"Hello! Is anybody here?" Tim called.

Tim went into the next room to find his father lying on his back and a boomerang sticking out of his chest. Tim ran to him, emotions mixed. He was happy to see him again, yet sad that it was in this state.

"Dad? Dad?" Tim called to him. In his haste to help his father he pulled the boomerang out of the man's chest and as he did, his father too turned to dust and blew away.

"No! Dad!" Tim openly sobbed. Tim left the room and went upstairs. He stood at one end of a long hallway, suddenly feeling cold, and as he wrapped his arms around himself he found himself naked except for his underwear. As he turned around in confusion he saw Dick walking into the nearest room with his Robin costume in hand, Damian following him and the door closing behind them both.

"Dick! Wait!" Tim called rushing to the door, pulling on it only to find it locked. Tim then heard his name being called. It was Jason's voice.

"Jason? Where are you?" Jason's voice grew softer and softer, farther away like it was going down the hallway. Tim looked at the end of the hallway to see Bruce standing there looking at Tim.

"Bruce!" Tim called and he started running down the hallway after Bruce. As Tim ran the hallway distorted and elongated making it impossible for Tim to reach his goal, to reach Bruce.

"Who are you?" The ghostly image of Bruce asked. Tim kept running towards Bruce, confused by the question. "Who are you?" Bruce repeated.

The hallway went on forever and the end of the hallway got darker and darker until he saw Bruce no more. The darkness crawled toward Tim; it enveloped him until it was all he saw, suffocating him. Confusion overtook him as he heard two voices. He couldn't make out anything, his senses in overdrive, not allowing him to compute anything.

Back out in the room.

"Come on, Tim, don't do this! Tim!"

Tim's eyes slammed open and he took in a deep breath. Tim reached his arms out, reaching for something only he could see. Both Roy and Jason moved in front of Tim, keeping in his line of sight. Tim looked back and forth between Roy and Jason in confusion. Tim began to openly sob.

Jason smoothed Tim's hair back, looking at the boy. "Hey, hey ,hey, what's wrong?" Jason asked.

Tim's response chilled Jason as the boy looked at his brother with great confusion and croaked out, "Who am I?"