Hey readers... so this chapter is definitely not my finest writing. But quite honestly, I needed to move on from it so I just decided to upload it. There is a good chance that I'll just scrap the whole thing so be on the look out for a completely new chapter 8. I realize that this is still a pretty short chapter but I'm trying to slowly move into making chapters longer.
Chapter 8
As I walked, then began to run, I realized that I didn't have any horrible thoughts toward the three boys. I knew I should have, but I didn't. Instead, I'd only held hatred in my heart toward myself.
I was met with headlights once I made it to the main street. I stopped running. My breath caught when I saw Rachel Berry come tumbling out of the car.
Her eyes bulged out, it was actually quite unsettling, " Quinn! Oh my gosh, what happened? You're bleeding! I'm taking you to the hospital."
I sighed, trying to act nonchalant about the whole thing. But she saw through me. She always did. " Berry, I'm fine. Can you give me a lift home?"
She looked at me. With this big brown eyes and stared straight in my soul. I felt myself cower a little. " I will take you home. " I must've looked unconvinced, because she repeated herself. " Quinn, I will take you home, but not before we go to the hospital or even the police."
I couldn't help the groan that escaped my lips, " Rachel, I just really want to shower and sleep. I swear I'm fine. Just take me home" I sounded whiney, I knew it. It wasn't the Quinn Fabray she was used to.
"I realize that I am being slightly insensitive at the moment, but I'm not discussing this any further Quinn. Either you let me drive you to the hospital or we stand here all night. I'm not leaving you either way, so make your decision. " Not leaving. How sweet two words could sound.
She was so infuriating. I mean, I know she means well. But damn it to all hell, I just wanted to shower and wipe the remnants of past few hours off my skin. " Fine." I walked to the passenger seat and got in the car, she followed suit getting into the drivers seat, "drive Berry".
There was more silence in the hospital room than anything else. I don't know about you, but I find silence to be chilling. I kept a brave front, even when the police showed up. It was the memory of the stares that spoke loudest through my mind. They didn't look at me with sadness; they looked at me like I was broken. Like my life had been ripped apart because of these boys, they stared as if I was a lost cause.
"Miss Fabray, my name is Bailey and I'll be helping you out tonight. Is there anyone you'd like to call, anyone you'd want with you?"
Rachel. " uhm, the-the girl I came with. Can she be with me?"
"Yes, of course. I'll go get her. Before I go, can you tell me what happened?"
"I-I can't." Keep it together Fabray. "I need her here first."
"Okay, I'll be right back." She gave a reassuring smile and squeezed my hand.
She walked in without hesitation; she took my hand. For a split second, I felt safe. But her eyes. Oh god, how sad her eyes were. She knew. "Hi… are you doing okay?"
"Better now" and I meant it with my whole heart.
I remember relaying the story to the police officers. I remember Rachel's hand tighten around mine and her eyes shut when the officers asked for more detail. The rest of the hospital was a blur.
Somehow I ended up at home. She had been looking warily at me. "I'm okay Rach, I promise" I reassured her.
She stifled a cry, " No you're not Quinn. But you will be. If it's the last thing I do, I'll make you okay.
I should be reeling. I should be angry. No one tells Quinn Fabray that she is not okay. No one. But instead, I can't stop the tears from brimming over and I collapse. I feel her arms catch me and wrap tightly around my body.
I feel her shift around me, and I realize she's picking me up. Who knew such a small person could carry so much weight. I curl into her. We're in my bathroom. She lifts my shirt over my head and slips my shoes off my feet. She turns to start the shower. As she's leaving, I grab her arm, "Rachel… don't leave."
She hesitates and gives me a sad smile. I take her hand and I pull her into the shower with me. I feel her arms wrap around me and I can't stop the shiver that runs through my body.
I don't realize she's singing to me until my breathing settles.
Drink up with me now and forget all about the pressure of days
Do what I say and I'll make you okay.
And drive them away, the images stuck in your head.
I can feel myself falling.
People you've been before that you don't want around anymore
That push and shove and won't bend to your will
I'll keep them still
I closed my eyes and got lost in her voice, the words, and the feeling of her arms around me.
Drink up one more time and I'll make you mine
Keep you apart, deep in my heart. Separate from the rest.
Where I like you the best and keep the things you forget.
There was nothing sexual about this position. She was fully clothed; she washed my hair, and washed the memories of the night off my skin. In that moment, I forgot why she was here. I only felt her, saw her, loved her.
"Can you stay the night?"
"Of course, I'll call my Dad's." She saw the sudden fear in my eyes, "Don't worry, I won't tell them why, I'll be right back."
I smiled and started getting ready for bed.
Her arms enclose around me in bed, " Rachel… can y- you sing to me again?"
I can feel her smile against my neck. Going in and out of sleep, the only words that echoed in my dreams were:
I will never let you fall; I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all, even if saving you sends me to heaven.
It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
She broke into me. Her voice reached into me and grabbed me by the heart. It was the words, and the voice, and Rachel and me. I could only listen as she slowly collected the broken parts of me and placed them gently back together.
Music:
Behind the Bars: Elliot Smith
Your Guardian Angel: The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus