A/N: For an extremely long and heartfelt apology, please see the end of this chapter. Thank you.

"Why's it bothering you? I mean, besides the whole disobeying orders and risking your life for a stranger thing." Sam tried to backtrack out of the hole he'd dug for himself, unsuccessfully.

"Because it apparently meant nothing to your brother."

Balthazar tsked Dean. "I wouldn't say that to his face if I were you, Dean."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Fine. Why're you still here, anyway?"

The older man shrugged, taking another sip of whiskey. "You're good company. It'd be a shame if the Novaks let you be killed. You may be a high profile target, Dean Winchester, but you're good. Don't let anyone else go telling you any differently." Balthazar put the glass down on Dean's desk beside the bottle. "Unless it's Cas or your brother. I'm sure they wouldn't hesitate to tell you if you were being an idiot." He waved a hand, turning to leave Dean's office. "This won't be the last time we'll meet, Dean. Was nice meeting you though."

"Wait, so Balthazar just left? After that whole thing? He just kinda up and left?" Sam sat up, an incredulous look on his face.

Dean nodded, taking a sip of his whiskey. "And about that 'We'll meet again' shit, I haven't seen him since that point." His eyes went wide after a second. "Sammy, what time is it?"

"It is 12:08."

Sam glanced up to where Castiel was still standing by the window, silently wondering what was going on in the bartender's head. Dean downed the rest of his whiskey, oblivious to Sam's thoughtful expression. "I gotta over to Lisa's place. I promised her I'd only be taking a short break to hang out with Sammy." He stood, putting his jacket back on. "See ya later, Sammy." After a moment, Dean turned and looked at Castiel. "See you, Cas."

Once Dean was out of the bar, Sam turned to look at Castiel. "Do you wanna keep going, Castiel?"

Castiel sighed before turning back to Sam. "It would not be beneficial to your curiosity if I did not continue." He walked over to where he had been sitting earlier. "By this point, it is important to note that much of Dean and mine's past together involves us not in direct contact with each other. It involved a lot of other people confronting us about our brief meetings."

"You were right, Cassie. Dean Winchester isn't afraid to shoot someone if they sneak up on him."

Castiel sighed. "Gabriel, you wouldn't know that. You have not met him."

Gabriel grinned. "Or have I?" The taller brunette rolled his eyes. "Nah, I was just kidding, Cas. He does seem like he would be trigger-happy though." He wandered over to where Castiel was looking at a file. "Who's the dame?"

The younger Novak didn't look up from the file. "Mary Winchester."

Gabriel's eyebrows shot up. "Dean Winchester's deceased mother?"

That made Castiel look up. "What do you know?"

The Trickster shrugged. "Her husband was never truly convinced that his wife was dead after he saw some gal who happened to look like her walking down the street one day. He dragged the boys around for a few years before a family friend convinced him that Mary was really dead. After that, John Winchester settled down with his boys and started a PI business." Gabriel looked at Castiel's face, trying to understand what his younger brother was doing. "Why're you building a file up on her?"

"Mary Winchester was a very important member in the Campbell gang. Before she got married and had children, she was well on her way to becoming Samuel Campbell's successor. He had been grooming his daughter for the role since she could walk." Castiel didn't meet Gabriel's eyes, which his brother knew was a telltale sign of a lie. "Even if she is dead, it is always useful to have information that could someday become pertinent."

Gabriel sighed, setting himself down in the chair across from Castiel. "Alright, get it out, Cassie. What's up? And don't say nothing," he added when Castiel almost immediately opened his mouth to reply. "I know something's up."

Castiel closed his mouth again, carefully considering his answer. "John Winchester told his sons that their mother was not dead. He repeated this until the day he died. Samuel Winchester has since accepted the fact that his mother is dead. Dean, on the other hand…"

"You want back on Dean's good side."

Sam figured there was a reasonably good time to stop Castiel. "So…you think that Mom's still alive somewhere?"

Castiel sighed, not wanting to let Sam down. "After much research, I had concluded that there was a very slim possibility for your mother to not be dead if she was as well trained as I was led to believe."

The taller brunette bit his lip. "But?"

"But," Castiel continued. "That was years ago. I do not know if that research would still prove to be relevant six years later." He fiddled with his hands, looking down. "I do not want to give you false hope, Sam. As I said, the possibility for her survival was slim then, and it is even slimmer now. If I was able to put the pieces of the puzzle together, who else might have? They might have even put more together than I could." He sighed again. "I am sorry." Cautiously, he glanced up to look at Sam's reaction.

Much to Castiel's surprise, Sam nodded. "Dad never wanted to give up on Mom, not really. Everyone thought he'd let it go, settle back down, maybe remarry." He downed his remaining whiskey. "After Dad died, I was kinda hoping Dean'd let it go too. He seemed to, taking over Dad's PI business and helping me get myself through college." Sam laughed quietly. "Guess he never really did." The taller brunette cleared his throat. "So, what happened after that?"

Castiel took a deep breath. "Gabriel left me alone to continue building up my file on Mary. I suppose it is not very surprising that he was not the only one who heard of my research. Anna came to see me shortly after I had completed the file with as much information as I could find without alerting my brother."

"You're going to try to find her, aren't you?" Castiel sighed and turned to look at Anna. "Mary Winchester. You're going to see if she's still alive." The redhead looked at Castiel curiously. "Why?"

The brunette held his hands up placatingly. "It is only right that I investigate whether or not the heir of the Campbell gang is still alive -"

"That's not it." Castiel put his hands down, closing his mouth. "This is about Dean, isn't it?" Anna watched Castiel return to the file he had built on Mary Winchester. "Why would you do this for him? Hasn't he already accepted his mother's death, like his brother?"

"Everyone in your family seems to really like comparing Dean to me, or at least mentioning me," Sam said, leaning back in his chair.

A small smile crossed Castiel's face. "It is very difficult to have a conversation about Dean without having you come up in some way, Sam."

Both of them were quiet, Sam considering his next question. "Did you know?" Castiel looked back up at the taller brunette. "When we met, did you know who I was?"

"That is a difficult question," Castiel began carefully. "I admit, I did have my suspicions when we first met. The photos I had seen were outdated, from before you went to college."

Sam nodded, understanding what Castiel was getting at. "College was a big step for me. I know Dean was all for it, but before then…" He bit his lip. "Dad never really supported my decision to go to school. He didn't seem to care about me or Dean either, for that matter."

Castiel poured more whiskey into Sam's glass. "My condolences for the loss of your relationship with your father, Sam."

"Dad was a dick."

A/N: THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH WAYS TO SAY "I'M SORRY" IN ENGLISH SO I'M JUST GONNA SETTLE WITH SAYING IT MULTIPLE TIMES OVER AND OVER AGAIN. I AM SO SORRY FOR ONLY POSTING THIS NOW BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, TWO AND A HALF MONTHS IS FOREVER. Or is it shorter...ANywho, March was my school spring musical, so I couldn't really write at all during that, and I had the leftover writer's block back in February and then again the entirety of April. PLus, CAPTAIN AMERICA THE WINTER SOLDIER. So, that's that. BUT, reviews/critiques/general feedback are amazing fantasmigorical! (If anyone reads this, anyway.)

UPDATE 8/7/14: "Cas is Actually A Good Guy" chapter title changed to "The Things We Do For Love" by 10cc.