I know I am completely crap at updating this, so.. I am sorry about that. I'm not very well at the moment, so my writing has been more sporadic, but I really am appreciative to anyone who has continued to stick with this story, I promise to update sooner next time if wanted! This chapter is one of the weaker ones, I'm afraid, but please try and bear with me and I'll make it up to you! Thanks again, and as always, please review.. I'll be more than happy to accept all criticism that will be rightly thrown my way with this offering! ;) xx

Chapter 12:

"Can't we just go back home?" Rachel asked hopefully, the dread in her voice causing Janet to take a hand off of the wheel and rest it reassuringly on the brunette's knee.

"And what would you do if we did go back home?"

"Well.." despite it all, she couldn't help a seductive grin cross her face as she raised an eyebrow.

"Rachel!" Janet spluttered, gripping the steering wheel harder as she let out a weak laugh and her stomach gave a powerful lurch. "Okay, I'll rephrase. If we went back home now, are you telling me that you wouldn't spend a lot of time worrying?" She waited for a response but was only met with silence. Glancing to her left she saw the stubborn, slightly adolescent, pout on her partner's face and had to bite back a grin. "Well? Are you?!"

"Not the point," Rachel muttered, sinking back into her seat as she felt Janet give her knee a squeeze.

"Yes it is, Rach, come on," the blonde coaxed. "Besides, you can't stay away from work forever."

"Can if I want to."

"Bloody hell, if I thought you were a moody cow before, I take it all back!" Janet teased lightly.

"Blame the baby. And while you're at it, blame the baby for making me throw up three times already today. I can not fucking believe that something so small can do all this stuff to me." She looked out of the window, watching the familiar scenery rush by as she took a small sip of fortifying water. "I really don't want to do this."

"Well, you're going to have to! You need to take it easy, you know that."

"Fine, fine," Rachel held a hand up in mock surrender, "You win. But the condition is that you have to buy a takeaway tonight. Fair?"

"Very," Janet grinned wryly, pulling into the car park and shutting off the engine. "Rachel," she began, waiting for the brunette to face her, "You're going to be fine. I promise." She kept eye contact for a long minute before forcing herself to look away; no matter how much she wanted to kiss away Rach's fears, she couldn't, not when any passer-by could catch a glimpse. Settling on sliding her hand into the other woman's, she held it tightly before letting go and climbing out of the car.

"Come in," Gill's commanding voice rang through the closed door and Rachel felt the pit of her stomach drop, though she wasn't sure if that was fear in regards to what she was about to face or just yet more bloody morning sickness. Opening the door slowly, she popped her head around.

"Have you got a minute, ma'am?"

"Make it quick."

Rachel fully entered the room and sat down in the chair opposite her boss. Her mouth suddenly felt dry and she wished yet again that she had the same sort of relaxed friendship with Gill that Janet had. Late last night, still shrouded in the ecstatic haze of the baby scan and her and Janet reuniting, she had just been drifting into sleep when a thought came to her which caused her to cry out, inadvertently scaring the shit out of Janet. Reality had begun making itself known around the periphery of her current bliss and she found herself embroiled in a state of pure panic as she considered work. Although the doctor had made it very clear that this pregnancy was progressing brilliantly and that it was extremely unlikely that it would follow the path her past pregnancy had taken, she couldn't help but be caught in a vice-like grip of fear that history would repeat itself. And even though she'd been assured that the miscarriage had been due to an unavoidable freak-accident abnormality, truth was Rachel still held herself accountable in a lot of ways. Including how she had continued to push herself at work. She wasn't prepared to risk anything this time around and so had decided, with Janet's sleepy but loving support, to inform Gill about the baby although they had agreed not to tell her about their relationship yet – one bit of big news was enough for one day, thank you very much. And so here she was, not daring to look at Gill's face, instead focussing on her hands that were twisting and fidgeting in her lap.

"Believe it or not, Rachel," Gill stated impatiently, "I've got a Syndicate to run. So, as much as I really do enjoy the times you come in and sit in my office looking very much like you would rather be dying a painful death than sitting here, I'm going to have to rush you."

"Sorry," Rachel mumbled, wondering if there would ever be a time that her superior's bluntness would not fail to both surprise her and make her immediately revert to a sulky teenager, "There's something I need to tell you."

"If you've fucked up again," the older woman warned, "you're on your own. There is only so many times I can lay my neck on the line to cover up for your stupid mistakes."

"No.. no, it's nothing like that."

Gill leaned back in her chair, a speculative look on her face. Rachel didn't look like she usually did when she owned up to any wrong-doings, she mused as she subconsciously fiddled with her glasses, in fact, she just looked plain nervous. And maybe a tiny bit green. "Oh fucking hell," Gill blurted suddenly causing Rachel to finally raise her head, "You haven't got a bug have you? How many times do I have to tell people; if you're ill, stay the fuck away!"

"I haven't got a bug."

"Well, I'm telling you now, you look like shit." She retorted firmly, her usual briskness melting slightly as concern started to edge its way into her mind-set. "Rachel," her tone softened as she looked at the younger woman, "What is it? I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong."

At this sudden unexpected display of warmth that was so rarely given from her boss, Rachel felt tears welling up as she furiously tried to blink them away, embarrassment causing her to blush. She'd never been much of a crier – unless alcohol was involved, at any rate – but that was yet another thing that had changed. She found herself almost constantly close to tears lately, something that she felt rather uncomfortable about. "Shit!" she muttered quietly, half as an apology to Gill and half in sheer frustration with herself for apparently being some kind of emotional fucking wreck. Without a word, but with dread now flowing through her veins, Gill slid the box of tissues across the table before leaning back again and waiting as patiently as she knew how. It wasn't an easy task. She was the first to admit that patience wasn't one of her virtues. "I'm really sorry."

"It's okay," the DCI said gently, her frown deepening as she saw Rachel start to cry in earnest. "Is it.. is this to do with your appointment at the gyna-"

"No!" Rachel shook her head violently, wondering if she'd ever live that non-existent appointment down. "No, nothing like that. I'm.. er, I'm pregnant."

"Pregnant?!" Gill's voice rose an octave and she watched Rachel give a small nod. "Sean?"

"Yeah."

"Are you happy?"

"Yeah."

"You don't look it."

"No, I am." Rachel looked back up and met Gill's gaze. "I'm just.. worried."

"Because of last time?" the DCI asked kindly, her heart rather abruptly going out to the woman sat opposite her as she remembered the miscarriage.

"Yeah."

"Have you been for a scan?" She saw Rachel nod. "And it was okay?"

"Perfect. They, um, the doctor said that there was nothing to indicate that this pregnancy would go wrong, but.."

"But it doesn't stop you feeling absolutely bloody petrified."

"Pretty much. And my hormones are having some sort of fucking wild party and making me even more moody and panicky and.. ugh.." she trailed off, glancing around the room suddenly feeling awkward.

"More moody? Christ. Didn't know that was possible. I'll have to send out a warning memo," Gill joked, feeling relieved when she noticed a brief smile touch Rachel's lips. "Okay," she continued more seriously, "So, obviously you're going to be on light duties from here on in. I know you hate desk work, but I won't risk your health and, let me tell you something, if you think you can go around lifting heavy things and running around trying to be fucking Superman, you've got another thing coming."

Rachel sat in silence, once again in awe and more than a tiny bit unnerved – as she always was when this side of Gill made an appearance – at the almost maternal way her boss was talking to her. She couldn't help a twang of guilt pass through her as she remembered how many times she bitched about the woman who, when it came down to the gritty stuff, went above and beyond her role in every way she could. "Thanks," she said in a small voice, feeling stupid now for how nervous she had been about telling Gill. The woman might be blunt, rude, insensitive even at times, but she wasn't bloody heartless.

"When are you due?"

"Middle of January, that's what it's looking like at the moment, anyway."

"How is Sean feeling?"

Rachel looked down, her body stiffening at the very prospect of telling him. Sean. Everything just felt so fucking complicated at the moment that it was overwhelming and, when she thought of everything she had to do, Rachel floundered helplessly. She was in no doubt whatsoever that if she didn't have Janet she would not be able to cope with all the changes her life was currently going through. "He's fine," she muttered, realizing that everyone in the office still thought that she was with him. It would have opened more than one can of worms if she told Gill that the father of her unborn child hadn't even been told yet, though her stomach twisted uneasily at the lies she was beginning to tell.

Janet left it for two minutes and then followed Rachel to the toilets, finding the brunette leaning over the sink when she walked in. "Well," she started conversationally, very obviously dragging her gaze over the woman before her, "You don't look dead, so I'm guessing I can call armed response and tell them they can stand down."

"Ha ha," Rachel stuck her tongue out, unable to fathom how the mere present of the blonde woman caused her mood to increase tenfold, a smile pulling at the corner of her lips as she turned around slowly.

"Honestly, love," Janet sounded more earnest now as she crossed the small area until she was stood mere inches in front of the tall brunette, "Are you okay? Did it go alright?" She couldn't stop a hand from reaching out and gently pushing away the hair that was falling around Rachel's face, her palm lingering against the flushed cheek as Rachel leaned into her touch.

"More than fine. She was.." she searched for the right word, "… nice. It scares me when she does that."

Janet laughed, her thumb skimming in soothing circles over Rachel's soft skin. "I told you, didn't I? Please, for the love of God, tell me that you will finally let go of this whole 'Gill hates me' crusade now?!"

"Hey, just because she's your best bloody friend and even if you burned down the fucking building she would still be like 'Oh well, we all make mistakes'.. you don't see the way she is with me!" Rachel retorted, beginning to laugh herself as she heard how petulant she sounded. "Okay, okay. I'll try. But no promises, alright?!"

"I know I said that you are far more moody at the minute, but, bloody hell, I don't think I have ever known you to give in and admit defeat twice in a matter of hours. It's not even 11am! Are you feeling alright?"

"Wow, you're killing it with your one liners today, aren't you?!" the brunette replied sarcastically, a small frown flitting across her face as Janet's hand left her cheek. She wasn't left bereft for long, however, as, without warning, Janet took the one step forward needed to close the distance between them and crushed her lips against those they so desperately sought. Sarcasm, anxiety, banter.. they all abruptly vanished, leaving only a low, yearning ache of desire to pass between the two women as their surroundings ceased to exist and Rachel parted her lips, allowing the blonde's tongue to slip inside, a low growl emanating from her as she got her first taste of the brunette's waiting mouth. Rachel, immediately fired up in a way only Janet managed to evoke, brought her hands up to the blonde's face, pulling her as close as was physically possible while her heart leapt and pounded and raced as she felt a familiar hand lightly brush against her breast, her only qualm being the flimsy material that prevented skin on skin contact. She felt herself being pushed backwards and within two steps was pressed against the sink, a position that – at any other time in her life – would be uncomfortable to say the least, but right now, in this moment, with this woman, the woman she had fallen so deeply in love with, it only served to excite her further.

Breathing became more jagged as they got lost in the moment, the fact that anyone could walk in not registering with either of them as hands flew everywhere in an attempt to explore every inch that they could reach. It was only when Janet felt Rachel's fingers fumbling with the buttons on her shirt that she yanked herself away, gripping onto the sink next to the brunette and panting heavily, the risk they'd just taken hitting her full force and leaving her with a mixed sense of disbelief and excitement. Out of the corner of her eye she watched as Rachel took several long, deep breaths before splashing her face with cold water and fiddling with her hair.

"Where the fuck did that come from?!" Rachel asked as soon as her breathing was semi under control, eyes wide and lips feeling deliciously bruised.

"Just thought it might be the fastest way to stop your sarcasm," Janet fired back flippantly, only the barely visible lust in her eyes telling the real truth.

"Gonna have to try and be a sarcastic bitch more often then, aren't I?!" Rachel grinned, a glint in her eye as she had to consciously force herself to not listen to every nerve in her body that was begging to feel Janet pressed up against her again. "Okay, we're going to have to go. If we don't.. I can't be held responsible for what I might do."

Janet's laugh contained a trace of the husk that remained in her voice. "It's tempting but you've only just gotten on Gill's good side, I don't think it would be the best idea for her to walk in on us 'committing a lewd act' by shagging on the toilet floor!" She grinned at Rachel's responding chuckle and started to follow her out of the door when she suddenly made a grab for her arm, causing the taller woman to turn around with a questioning expression. "Did it really go okay though? With Gill?"

"Yes," Rachel smiled, touched at the obvious concern in her partner's eyes, "It did. I'm on light duties from now on, which isn't any surprise, and, er, well.. she was just.. yeah, nice. Really nice," she finished, the surprise still evident on her face as she thought about it.

"Good," Janet gave a warm grin before shepherding Rachel out of the door, "But if we skive for much longer, we'll both be facing detention!"

As predicted, it only took Rachel four hours to become thoroughly fed up with being stuck at her stupid desk, filling out hundreds of stupid reports, being forced to watch everyone else go out and be an actual shitting police officer. She could feel her temper rising as Pete walked in to the office bragging about an arrest he'd made on their latest highest priority case. Determinedly keeping her head down, she bit her tongue and glared at her computer screen.

"Anyone for a cuppa?" Lee called, and Rachel nodded her head gratefully.

"You alright, Rach?" Janet asked quietly across the desk, seeing how stressed the woman opposite her was getting and wanting to be able to provide comfort, feeling frustrated at how little she could do.

"Fine," the brunette snapped, immediately raising her eyes to meet the blonde's and mouthing 'Sorry'. She relaxed slightly as she was rewarded with an understanding smile, and gave a grateful grin of her own in return before returning to the work in front of her.

"There you go," Lee placed the mug of tea on Rachel's desk before handing out the rest.

"Cheers, Lee," Rachel replied, exhaling slowly and shaking herself off as she reached into her drawer for her biscuits. Confusion grew as her hand didn't land on them straight away and, completely irrationally she knew, she felt her anger begin to rise as she got on the floor and rooted through the whole thing, slamming it shut when it provided nothing and opening the drawer above it, but no. Nothing. "Kevin?"

"What?"

"Where are my biscuits?"

"What?"

"Don't act stupid. Where are they?"

"Um.." the guilty expression on his face said it all. "I was going to buy you some more.."

"You're a fucking pig." She fumed, not able to control the complete overreaction of rage that she was suddenly feeling. "If you want biscuits, buy your fucking own!"

"Alright! Bloody hell, is it your time of month or something?"

Rachel stood up and walked over until she was cowering over Kevin, who was looking decidedly less cocky than he had been just seconds before. "What was that?"

"Nothing.."

"No, Kevin. It isn't my 'time of month'," she spat the words out in contempt, "I'm just sick and fucking tired of apparently being your own personal shitting supermarket."

"You don't go off like this on anyone else!" he muttered sulkily, "Maybe you need a good shag."

"I don't go off on anyone else because I happen to respect everyone else in this office. And maybe you need to grow up because, I guarantee, you will never get laid as long as you continue to be a snivelling knobhead. Maybe you should give up your love of Lego and grow the fuck up!" Rachel's voice rose in volume with every word until she felt a hand on her arm and looked up, coming face to face with Janet.

"Come on, Rach," she tried to placate, "I've got some bourbons. Just tell Kev to fuck off, you know what he's like." Shooting him her most stern look, she led the brunette back to her desk. "You alright?" she whispered as she bent close to talk in her ear.

"Yes. No. Ugh! I'll be fine. Sorry," Rachel looked embarrassed at her outburst, even more so when she suddenly noticed Gill stood in the doorway.

"Hey, Rach, you want a fag?" Pete asked kindly, kindness etched in his face.

Clearly he wasn't to know that this was probably the worst thing that anyone could have offered Rachel at this point, what with her having made the abrupt choice to stop smoking as soon as she'd found out that she was pregnant. She was positive that the cravings were playing their part in her severe mood swings and just held on to the hope that as her body became accustomed to the lack of nicotine, her mood would become more level. "No," she tried to sound normal but even she could notice the sharp edge in her tone, "I don't. Thanks."

"Rachel." Gill called, "Office."

The brunette stood up, her anger having not abated and building herself up for an argument. For once, she didn't give a shit though she couldn't help but notice the worried look that Janet shot her. Stalking into the DCI's office, she flung herself into the seat, an insolent expression on her face. "What?"

"Listen, lady, I want to help you in any way I can, alright? But I will not put up with being spoken to like a piece of shit on the bottom of your shoe, so you better think long and hard about your tone when you speak to me, understood?"

"Sorry.." Rachel sighed, contrition clear in her voice as she stared at her hands. "Just stressed."

"Yeah. I can tell."

"I'm not sorry for having a go at Kevin though; he is a knob."

"You think I'm going to disagree with you?!" Gill asked, an eyebrow arched, "But.. maybe you were a little bit.. over the top." She saw Rachel's head shoot up, a look of outrage on her face, "Rachel, he ate some biscuits. You know that if he needs a talking to, I'm more than happy for it to happen, but if you keep screaming at people over shit that doesn't really matter, you're going to end up with no mates. When are you going to tell them about the pregnancy?"

"Dunno. Not yet."

"I'm assuming you've told Janet seeming as I never see one of you without the bloody other?"

"Er," the brunette's heard almost came to a stop as she fought to hide the panic she suddenly felt, "Ye-yeah. Janet knows. No one else though, I don't want to become the office gossip just yet, thanks."

"Well, think about it. Without knowing that you're pregnant, they're all just going to think you've turned into a complete bitch." Gill forced her voice to become friendlier, "Look, go home, alright? Go home, have a bath, chill out, sort your fucking attitude out. You've got tomorrow off, haven't you?" She waited for her DC to nod, "Good. Come back in on Saturday and we'll sit down and sort out your maternity leave and everything like that, okay?"

"Thank you," Rachel replied tiredly.

"I'm not doing you a favour, I just don't want any of my team to be murdered, that's all. Now go on, go home. Have a talk with Janet later. I dunno. Just do something that will help you relax. Yes?"

"Yes, ma'am," she stood up and headed for the door and was just about to open it when she hesitated and turned back around, "Gill?" she said nervously, watching as her senior looked up expectantly, "Thanks. For today. You've been.. well.. just, thanks. Really."

"No need to thank me. I may push you for results, Rachel, and get on your back and get so frustrated with you it's unreal and honestly sometimes want to just kick the-" she paused, trying to reel herself in from her tangent, aware that Rachel was looking less than impressed at her tirade, "Sorry," she gave a small grin, "No. Listen. You may drive me up the wall, but I care. I do hope you know that, Rachel. Sometimes I lose my temper, but if I didn't give a shit about you, about your potential, I really wouldn't bother."

"Um.. thanks.."

"Now, I'm being serious, piss off and stop fishing for compliments," Gill said firmly, pulling an abrupt end to the niceties as she pulled her glasses back on her nose and looked at her computer. Rachel turned around and left the room, unaware of her boss' hidden smile aimed at her retreating back.

"Oh god.. oh.. that is so good.." Rachel moaned as Janet continued giving her a foot massage.

"Um.. I can tell. I know I give good massages, but bloody hell, I didn't know they were that good!"

"Ohhh…"

"You're disturbing me a bit now, Rach," Janet teased.

"Piss off! Anyway, I've changed my mind, I don't mind being pregnant as long as I get one of these every day."

"And what do I get in return?!"

"You get to benefit from my ridiculously high sex drive, of course," Rachel purred, giving a wink.

"You're a tit, Bailey!"

"You know, I don't think I've ever met anybody who is as complimentary as you are," she grinned sarcastically, "Honestly, warms me to my heart, it does!"

"Shut up and let me give you your massage," Janet rolled her eyes good-naturedly and watched as her partner seemed to visibly sink back into the couch. It had been a nice evening. Janet hadn't got out of work for another three hours after Rachel had left and by the time she'd got back home, the brunette seemed to be in a much better mood, so much so that they'd picked Taisie and Elise up and taken them to a carvery, something that they all enjoyed. And now they were home, just enjoying light conversation and Janet could feel herself filled with a sense of content.

"Ahem," Rachel cleared her throat, eyebrows raised as Janet looked up, "Don't slow down or you'll make baby sad!"

"Oh, sod off! You can't use that on me, it's not fair!" Janet joined in with Rachel's laughter, about to say something else when the landline rang.

"Leave it," Rachel groaned, "Whoever it is can piss off!"

"Well, if it's important, they can get us on our mobiles," Janet agreed, pulling Rachel's other foot towards her. Before she'd even completed the move, the taller woman's mobile started to ring. "Oops. Think I jinxed it!" she grinned as Rachel swore loudly. Removing her hands to allow the other woman to sit up, she watched as Rach picked up the phone.

"Hello?" Rachel answered, having not bothered to look at caller ID. Obviously Janet couldn't hear the other person, so when a look of confusion settled on her partner's face, she sat up a bit straighter. "Um.. okay," she heard Rachel say before continuing with, "What's happened?," the pallor of the taller woman turning to an unhealthy sickly shade. As if in a movie, Janet watched in disbelief as the phone literally fell out of Rachel's hand.

"Rach? Rachel, what is it?" the blonde asked, her voice panicked. There was no reply. "Rachel! What's happened?" When she concluded that she had no hope of getting any sort of explanation from the woman sat beside her, she reached for the dropped phone, putting it to her ear. "Hello?"

"Janet? It's Gill."

"Gill?! What the fuck is going on? What have you said to Rachel?"

"It's Dom," Gill replied, "They've arrested him."