SEBULBA
Sebulba was piloting his podracer with his feet. Dug were very agile and were more capable with their feet than with their hands. He had the magical power of being able to breathe in space so don't ask me how he's doing this. He had also added some pretty sweet lasers to his podracer. By now all 4 Enterprises were gone and the Death Star was blowing up from the inside while Jeff Goldblum flew a puny ship out of it. Sebulba shot the ship and Jeff Goldblum blew up and died.
Spaceball One turned to plaid and escaped the scene because it was all beat up from the Death Star's super laser. (It was bigger than a planet, so the Death Star couldn't completely destroy it with one shot). Sebulba shot the sheep that was floating into space and it exploded in a mess of blood and gore, which had previously been the Normandy SR-2. He would be happy to see Seth Green dead. He thought it was ridiculous that they charge like $30-$40 for a season of Robot Chicken while the episodes are only like 10-15 minutes long.
Everybody was blown up except for the Millennium Falcon, but eventually its occupants would all be dead or otherwise rendered disabled because they tripped on barf.
Sebulba stopped his podracer and surveyed the battle space. Everyone was dead (or otherwise disabled because they tripped on barf (but not Barf from Spaceballs. The Winnebago got blown up, too.))
Sebulba now only had one more thing to do: kill all the Ewoks. Sebulba won. He knew he would win.
Sebulba always wins.