AN: The rating will go up with this chapter for language and sexual situations in the rest of the story.

Thanks so much for reading; let me know what you think :)

Sadie was quiet for a moment before she spoke. "You don't have anything to apologize for." Her fingers slid through his hair, caressing, comforting and it felt good. "You were never dishonest with me. I wouldn't ever change what happened between us."

Bill took a breath, eyes still closed. A part of him never wanted to leave this one moment, them alone and holding each other, nothing else, but he wanted her to know him, know what was in his heart.

Eventually he made himself pull away and he looked up again. She cast him a soft smile and he returned it, pulling her down to sit on his lap.

"I'm still sorry to have involved you in my crazy life. Sorry to have started a relationship with you before my last was over, that wasn't fair."

"I think it was over," she answered softly, looping her arms around his shoulders. "But you both still held on... Bill -" she looked at him, touching his jaw and searching his eyes. "I knew what I was getting into. I understood. I wanted to be with you."

Bill nodded. Before he could say anything more the sound of the bubbling water could be heard from the stove and she stood to fetch the pan off the heat.

They were both quiet while she fixed their tea, adding a splash of milk to his and a teaspoon of sweetener to hers. Holding the mismatched mugs by the handles, she brought them back to the table, sitting in a chair next to his.

She crossed her long legs, and he watched the motion, wanting to reach out to her, slide his fingers over her knee, but holding back.

Sadie pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear and blew over the rim of her cup, watching him, quiet. His gaze fell to the purse of her lips, soft and pink, and then back to her eyes, curious, thoughtful.

When he spoke his voice was low and soft. "It's over now, with Barb. It's done. I'm not holding on any longer."

Sadie took a cautious sip of tea, and nodded, perhaps turning the information over in her head.

"What happened?" she asked.

He almost laughed. Where to start? But there was time for all that later, some other time. If she wanted him. He wouldn't burden her unless she made that decision.

Bill sighed, looking off into the distance. "We fought, a lot. Jean was miserable, and Barb was losing her temper every other minute. Too much...too much to deal with. I tried to be there for her, but it made no difference. She didn't want anyone to know we'd separated, but they all found out anyway."

Sadie took a long sip of tea. "Did you sleep with her?"

Bill looked away, into his mug and then out the window before answering. "We slept in her old room, together. We haven't had sex in months."

Sadie nodded and Bill was relieved to see the understanding on her face. She was so different from Barb in so many ways. Never quick to judge, careful not to jump to conclusions. She had a hot temper when she was angry, but she always apologized right after, and forgot within the hour, and she had never insulted him.

Sadie reached for his hand on the table, seeming to want a connection and he grasped it tightly, his thumb rubbing the inside of her wrist. The tea was cool enough to drink now, and he took a long swallow, savoring the flavor and the warmth. She drank as well, silent and he could see the wheels turning in her mind before she spoke again.

"If we decide to be together...I want it to be all the way this time, Bill. I don't want to be jerked back and forth on a string while your wife cuts you to pieces. I can't -" she looked down, fiddling with a button on her shirt. His shirt. "I don't want to see you hurt. I don't want..." She trailed off, and he squeezed her hand, sad. It wasn't often she was at a loss for words and he hated he was causing this within her.

But she smiled at him then, and he shook his head, unbelieving at her kindness. She scooted closer, squeezing his hand back. "As much fun as the first time was, I've grown to care about you a great deal, and I don't want another fling. If we're going to do this, I want it to be real."

Bill lifted his hand, trailing his finger over the curve of her cheek then slipping his hand into her hair. "I want it to be real, as well. I only want you."

Her lips curved into a half smile and her brown eyes sparkled. Taking his near-empty cup, she stood and put both in the sink, but she stayed there, looking out over the yard. A drop of heavy rain splattered against the window, and then another and another, pinging on the metal of the screen door.

Bill stood up, and moved to stand behind her. Honestly he had no idea what she was thinking, none at all. He hoped he had the rest of his life to figure her out.

They watched the rain, falling harder with each minute and he raised his hand to touch her shoulder, rubbing lightly.

"Should I stay?" He murmured, leaning very close so his lips were almost touching her ear.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea."

Bill ducked his head, disappointed but accepting her answer. He stepped to turn away, but she moved as well, spinning around and stopping him before he could.

She circled her arms around his shoulders. "But I think I'd really like you to," she smiled, warm, so open.

"Oh?" He let his own hands slide to her back, holding her close.

"Mmm," she murmured, her eyes sparkling wickedly. "I do. After what you've been through, I think you need a really good fuck. And a good long cuddle."

His pulse jumped, and he laughed, slipping his hands underneath her shirt to touch warm, bare skin, wanting her. He was hard already. "Nothing could sound better, Sade."

"Good."

Bill sighed deep, dropping his head to her shoulder, pressing his lips to her throat and breathing her in as she wrapped her arms tighter around him. God, she felt good.

She kissed his temple, the curve of his ear and then pulled back to slip his glasses off. "Let me take care of you," she murmured.

"But I don't -" He wanted to be here for her, to prove to her that he wanted her, but she seemed to have something else in mind.

"Hush," she kissed him, then nipped at his lip. He almost groaned, tightening his hands on her hips.

"I'm in charge right now," she smiled, a glint in her eyes. "You can be in charge later."

"Really?" he chuckled.

"Oh yes. You can truss me up and have your way with me. You can even tie me to the bed, if you like."

He did groan at that; she was teasing but the thought was more than tempting, and he knew she was up for just about anything. Those thoughts were scattered to the wind however as she kissed him again, her fingers dipping and brushing over him, constrained by jeans that were now far too tight as she tugged at the buckle of his leather belt.

When she had the buckle undone, she rubbed her hand over the bulge in his dark jeans and looked up to watch the expression on his face as she stroked him.

Sadie grinned, raking her fingers through his hair with her free hand, and cupping him gently. Her grin widened.

"What?" he asked, trying to resist the urge to push her against the counter and take her here in the kitchen.

Sadie gave him a charming smirk. "You look so scholarly and proper with your glasses on," she said. "But take them off and you turn into...into a sex god. Like Superman."

Bill laughed and shook his head, unsure he would ever understand what she saw in him. But it made him feel alive and wanted, without constraint, in a way he'd never had before. It wasn't about age and it wasn't a crisis, it was about the way this woman made him feel as a man.

"C'mon," she gave him a sly look and took his hand firmly in her own, leading him toward her bedroom.