A/N: I'm not quite sure what to say before this chapter. What can I say? It's the one you've all been waiting for. I can only hope that I do not disappoint.
Thank you to all those who read and review. My email was sending all my notifications to my spam folder, so imagine my surprise when I discovered them and realized that my story was actually much more popular than I realized! Thank you all for your support; it means the world to me.
Disclaimer: I do not own A:TLA, only my original characters and plot devices.
Chapter Eighteen
Revelations
"For the last time, Anjiru, we can't leave that many soldiers in Ba Sing Se—I don't care how skittish you are about this invasion."
"…I still don't see why we're letting a sixteen-year-old girl tell us what to do."
"That sixteen-year-old girl is liaison to the Avatar, so I suggest you do as she says."
"Thank you, Eichi, but that sixteen-year-old girl is sitting right here. And honestly, if I were you, I'd worry more about me than the Avatar. Now, if we're done squabbling, I believe we've still got an invasion to plan?"
"Carry on."
It'd been like this for almost three days, and it honestly didn't look like it'd get much better. Mira and the Council of Five were currently seated around a table housing an enormous map of the world. Color-coded pieces were scattered across its surface, marking locations of regiments and ships and army bases. Several scrolls were stacked along the edges, along with the occasional cold cup of tea. The room was relatively spacious and contained large open windows to let in the spring air, but ants were still crawling across Mira's skin. Escape was so close, yet so far.
Her opposition came in the form of Anjiru and Tsuyo, two of the generals on the Council of Five. The other three—How, Sakusen, and Eichi—were patient, sensible men who didn't seem to mind receiving intelligence from a girl young enough to be their daughter. Anjiru and Tsuyo, however, took Mira's presence as a personal affront to their status.
Anjiru's muddy brown eyes jumped from place to place, never staying still for very long. His hands were almost as active, fingers twisting around and around nervously. He clung to his green army tokens like a drowning man clung to a life raft and sent Mira a squinty glare every time she tried to talk him out of one. She sighed as he raised his querulous voice to complain about the placement of troops for the fifth time that day.
Meanwhile, Tsuyo's eyes held Mira's in an unblinking stare, his lip curled in an expression of distaste. Insects didn't get this much scrutiny by fascinated four-year-olds, though the murderous intent might have been a little stronger. Tsuyo didn't speak as much as Anjiru, but when he did, it was to complain about how he was an awarded general who didn't need to listen to the flighty whims of a teenage girl. The urge to shove his little stone ships down his arrogant throat pushed against the last shreds of Mira's self-restraint.
A steady throbbing had long ago taken up residence in Mira's temple, and she massaged the spot with a sigh. "We've been over this before," she repeated. "We need at least five regiments for a successful attack on the Fire Nation, and you want to send us with two?"
"It's very possible that you're overestimating the strength of the Fire Nation," Tsuyo said.
"Five regiments does seem excessive," Anjiru piped up, always happy to argue for sending less soldiers. "I agree with Tsuyo—two will be plenty."
"It was you who spent the last hundred years completely oblivious to this war, correct? Then wouldn't it be you who are underestimating them?" Mira asked icily, one eyebrow arched.
Sakusen hid a grin behind his hand while Eichi's laugh morphed quickly into a cough. Mira's own lips twitched in response. At least she wasn't alone in her quest for troops: as of right now, it was three against two (not counting herself). If all else failed, a simple majority vote would suffice to get her the manpower she needed. Still, she would feel better if she could bring the king a unanimous vote.
"Perhaps four regiments would suffice," How said, spreading his arms in a compromising gesture. "That way, Ba Sing Se would remain protected while the attack was underway."
Mira worried her bottom lip between her teeth. It wasn't ideal, but four could work. She nodded slowly. "I'll take four. We've called in some favors, so some outside manpower is available." She swallowed her pride and turned to Anjiru and Tsuyo. "If you would be willing, that is."
Anjiru narrowed his eyes, the gears in his mind working frantically as he processed this. Finally, he nodded and held out four tokens (albeit a little reluctantly). Eichi quickly took them and slid the pieces across the map, until they rested on the tip of the Earth Kingdom.
"General Fong's base will serve as a launching point for the attacks," How said, flicking a finger and sending the tokens skidding across the table to settle on the Fire Nation. "In exactly two months, the army and navy will invade the Fire Nation on the day of Black Sun." How paused and looked up at Tsuyo, who had yet to place a piece on the board. Without a word, he placed four ships on the board and sent them zooming for the Fire Nation, lips pursed like he'd been sucking on a lemon.
How added some lines to the scroll they'd been working on for three days, then rolled it up and passed it to Mira. "All we need to enact this plan is the Earth King's signature."
Mira inclined her head respectfully before taking the scroll. "I'll get this to him right away."
"In that case, I declare this meeting over. Dismissed."
Mira took her time in getting up, as some of her joints seemed determined to stick the way they were. A loud pop issued from her spine, and a shiver of pleasure shot down her back as her flexibility returned. With the scroll tucked away inside her cloak, she started for the war room doors.
"Mira? If we could have a moment?" She turned to find Sakusen and Eichi still standing by their chairs—Tsuyo, Anjiru, and How had long since left the room.
She nodded and approached them, her wariness replaced with curiosity. "Can I help you?"
"Your conduct these past three days has been most impressive," Sakusen said. He wore a serious expression, though his brown eyes were warm and kind. Mira found she had to look slightly down to meet them. His stature didn't detract from his rank; rather, his stocky build and rough hands spoke to his years as a solider and gave him a quiet aura of power.
The other general, Eichi, was not so reticent. His was an easygoing face, with bright green eyes that zipped from place to place (though not in the cagey way Anjiru's did). His hair was a little longer than Sakusen's military-regulation haircut, and everything about him seemed more laid back. But Mira had been witness to him in the war room, and knew that he possessed as much seriousness as he did joviality.
Both men had won her respect by the way they'd treated her, as though she were an equal and not a girl less than half their age. And so it was with a genuine smile that she answered, "Thank you, Sakusen." They'd long since abandoned formality, as it became quite tedious calling each man General This or General That.
"You're awfully wise and patient for someone your age," Eichi remarked.
"I've been through quite a lot," Mira answered. "Though I don't know about patient. I kept daydreaming about shoving Tsuyo's boats down his throat."
Eichi threw his head back and laughed loudly. "We all have at some point," he said in between chuckles.
Mira looked to Sakusen, and he nodded. "It's true," he said, a small smile on his face.
"Well, I'm just happy we could find a solution," Mira said.
"As are we," Sakusen agreed. "Before you deliver that scroll, however, we have a proposition for you."
Mira's eyebrows shot up. What could they possibly want from her?
"We were quite impressed with your ability to communicate intelligence, and your gift for strategy," Eichi continued. "In the wake of the revelation regarding this war, Sakusen and I have decided that we need an intelligence force—operatives who can go out and be our eyes and ears. We have relied on the Dai Li for far too long, and the Council of Five needs their own spies."
"That's an excellent idea, sir, but why are you telling me this?" Mira, though, had a feeling she already knew.
Sakusen and Eichi exchanged a look. "We would be honored if you would join this organization," Sakusen said. "We feel you would make an exemplary agent."
Mira had seen this coming, yet her mouth still dropped open in shock. The thought that anyone would want her to do something that important, after only just meeting her…she couldn't quite comprehend it. Her heart thudded a little faster at the offer, even though she knew what her answer had to be.
"I am honored that you asked, but I am afraid I must respectfully decline. I've got my hands full as it is, what with the Avatar and all. And, as you know, I am to take part in this invasion myself."
The two generals bowed to her, and she returned the gesture. "We understand," Eichi said. "We do regret that you cannot join us, though we understand why."
"Thank you," Mira said. "Now, if you don't mind…" She opened her cloak to reveal the scroll and tilted her head toward the door.
"Of course," Sakusen said, a small smile on his face. "It would not do to keep the king waiting."
"Perhaps we will see you again, before the invasion," Eichi said.
"Perhaps you will," Mira replied. "Good day." She turned and left, the scroll pressing against her side and the offer pressing against her thoughts.
She didn't regret turning them down, yet…as she walked through the richly green halls of the palace, her mind couldn't help but drift. What if she did say yes? An image of herself wrapped in a deep black cloak, pressed against a wall and listening to some faceless rebels sparked an excitement in her gut. With a dream-like motion, she pulled the forest green hood up to cover her face, than instantly felt foolish. Settling the hood around her head made her no more a spy than wearing the cloak did; she was acting like child. Shaking her head to dispel any notions of fantasy, she refocused her mind on the offer.
It'd been months since she'd been on her own, with no one to depend on and no one to answer to. Becoming a spy carried that excitement with it. Sure, Mira liked traveling with Aang, but sometimes she missed that sense of wickedness that came with sneaking around. She was a girl built for deception, and that part of her yearned for days past when she did what she wanted, when she wanted. She was a wild thing, that much she knew—and no matter how hard she might try, the domesticity of traveling with the Avatar would at some level grate on her.
But despite the excitement of the proposal, the faces of her friends made her hesitate. She was tied to them, tighter than she could ever imagine. Leaving now would hurt too much—for both she and them. Mira had started something when she joined the group, and she'd be damned if she wasn't going to see it through.
The large double doors of the throne room loomed before her, and Mira didn't hesitate to knock softly before heaving one open with a shoulder. She turned and closed it behind her, then faced the throne.
Three white-faced figures knelt by the empty throne, and Mira remembered with a start that Suki had arrived the day the others had left. She'd been so involved in the war plans that it'd slipped her mind. "Suki," she said, stepping forward. "I'm sorry, I forgot you were here. I was a little tied up…"
She trailed off as the girl closest to her looked up. Instead of Suki's steely gray, the eyes that met her gaze were a deep, burning gold. A cruel smirk twisted her features, and Mira's stomach clenched painfully.
This wasn't Suki.
In an instant, Mira sank into a defensive crouch, rods in hand. She wanted to scream, to demand that Azula leave Ba Sing Se immediately, but she knew nothing would sway her. So she braced for a battle—though at three against one, the odds were infinitely stacked against her.
Green flashed in her periphery, but before she could turn and face it, several jabs along her spine stopped her in her tracks. Pain radiated across her back and she collapsed to the floor.
"Dammit," she cursed, gaze stuck on a pillar across the room.
"Looks like we caught ourselves a friend of the Avatar, girls," Azula drawled, her feet coming into view. "Now we just wait for him to save the day." The feet turned away. "Keep her in the catacombs."
Mira's eyes widened, but before she could protest, something cracked against her skull, and everything went black.
Hours passed, and when Mira finally woke, it was to the mother of all headaches. She was lying on a hard, unforgiving floor, but the stone felt cool against her cheek. A persistent thudding echoed in her head as her stomach roiled angrily, and she dared not move until both decided to settle.
The air was cold and crisp around her, so it was not long until the headache receded. Cautiously, she pushed herself up into a sitting position, and when she finally got a good look as to where she was, her stomach threatened to empty itself once more.
A large cavern, bigger than an average house, lay sprawled before her. She sat in the middle, surrounded by boulders and huge chunks of glowing green crystal. They hung from the ceiling, poked from the floor, entwined and danced with each other as they lit the space. But despite their presence, Mira still felt sick.
She looked up, ignoring the voice in her head that warned her not to. The roof of the cave loomed high above her, though Mira would not have been reassured if it was any farther away. She was underground, buried below who knew how much rock and stone and dirt. There was no sun, there was no fresh air…there was only her, trapped here by Azula.
Azula. The name sent a shiver of panic up her spine. Azula was here, in the city. And from what she'd said before, she was looking for Aang. Mira wanted to scream and tear her hair out. There was nothing she could do to warn him, no matter how much she might wish she could. Oh, how she longed for the days when no one cared enough to save her! If she'd done her job, if she'd kept her distance, Aang wouldn't be in trouble. It'd only be her own skin on the line—something Mira had more than enough experience with.
Her thoughts were traveling down a road that was growing a little too morbid, so to escape it, Mira stood up on trembling knees and turned her attention to her prison. It was larger than others she'd been forced to endure—but it was belowground, which placed it squarely at the top of Mira's list of "Places-I-Hate-With-A-Burning-Fiery-Passion."
There was a wall nearby, and Mira placed on hand on its surface. The stone was cold and slick with moisture. Stilling running a hand alongside the surface, Mira began to pace the outer edge of her prison.
Three times around, and Mira was starting to regret the idea. Her fingers could find no crack, no lever, no hollow space where she could make her escape. As her hands began to tremble, Mira started to rub her fingers together in a rhythmic motion. Breaking out seemed more and more hopeless as the minutes passed, and she knew without a doubt that the longer she stayed here, the more likely it was that Aang was on his way. Never mind how he would know of her trouble—he was the Avatar! And that was the reason he couldn't come here. She needed out, right now. For his sake…and for hers.
Her chest tightened again as she caught sight of the cave walls. With every second that passed, the cavern seemed to shrink just a little more. Mira backed away from the walls and threw herself down on a low rock that served as a bench. With her head between her knees, she inhaled and exhaled deeply…though it didn't seem to do much good.
You'll have to use it,a small voice in the back of her head prodded. You know you will. No one's down here anyway. What's the harm in it?
If I use it now…she broke off with a shudder. Even isolated as she was, teetering on the brink of fear, the thought of her last resort twisted her stomach and made her dizzy. She couldn't do it. She wasn't strong enough.
I've never been strong enough.
She couldn't-wouldn't—do it. Not until absolutely necessary.
Her next exhale was shaky. Panic all she wanted, but there was nothing Mira could do now except wait and hope an opportunity to escape presented itself. At least Azula hadn't taken off the hood.
Her body sagged under the sudden wave of relief. Azula still didn't know who she was. Mira was safer than she thought.
Thank Daichi for small miracles.
The pressure on Mira's lungs lessened slightly, and she took a much needed gulp of air. Things could be worse, she told herself. They could always get worse.
The screeching groan of rock against rock cut through the air like a rusty knife. The sound sent Mira scurrying behind a large boulder, and she peered over the top at the passageway that had opened up at the mouth of the cave.
…Aaaand it's worse.
Though…perhaps she could use this to her advantage. If she waited, and hid, maybe she could take the guards by surprise and get out of this hellhole. Mira slid around the side of her boulder and dashed to the wall. She hugged the side, not daring to peek around the corner. The rough sounds of someone being manhandled drifted down to her, and a rough voice said, "You've got company." There was a solid thud as someone tumbled down the tunnel into the cavern. Mira ignored them and focused on the tunnel door, but it was already sliding shut with a groan. She swore and ran up the tunnel entrance, slamming into the stone just as it slid to a halt. Fists pounded on the rock, but all she earned for her trouble was a bruise. Another expletive punched the air as she descended, massaging her hand.
Than a third as she laid eyes on the person now sharing her prison.
Scratch that. Now it's a million times worse.
Zuko sat on the floor below her, dressed in a plain beige tunic and dark brown pants. He gave her a blank look and turned his back, leaving Mira reeling.
How—why was Zuko here, in Ba Sing Se? She hadn't seen him since the ghost town, when his uncle was injured. He'd been chasing the Avatar before, she knew, but they hadn't seen hide nor hair of him since then. Azula was the one doing the chasing. Did that mean, then, that Zuko was off their case? Had they been relegated to Azula, while Zuko was left to do who knows what? That seemed the most likely, since Zuko was trapped down here with Mira. He certainly wasn't in Azula's good graces, that was for sure.
A little worm on an idea wriggled into Mira's mind. If Zuko wasn't for sure on Azula's side, maybe he could be swayed to theirs. He'd be a powerful ally, that was certain. But gauging his loyalty required talking to him, something Mira wasn't quite sure she could do.
Awkwardly, she turned and walked back to her little bench. Aside from the slight turning of his head, Zuko gave no indication that he heard her.
With no plans of escape to fuel her, Mira's fear crept back slowly. It stole across her skin and burrowed into her lungs, squeezing them tighter and tighter with every breath. Her heart bounced off her ribs erratically, and no amount of steady breathing seemed to slow it. She buried her head in her hands and attempted to stay stock still, but a low trembling betrayed her.
"What's wrong?" The rasping voice cut through her haze of panic and froze her for a moment.
It took a few tried to get her voice to work. Even then, it shook with fear. "Nothing."
A snort. "That's the worst lie I've ever heard."
"None of your damn business," Mira snarled. Her breath was short, and her words came in a gasp. Her throat closed even tighter—she was drowning underground.
She didn't hear the footsteps until a pair of feet stopped just at the edges of her vision. "What's wrong?" he asked again, but this time, Mira didn't have enough energy to snap at him.
"Claus—claustrophobic. Can't…can't breathe."
There was a long silence, punctuated only by the sound of Mira's wheezing. This feeling hadn't come over her since Serpent's Pass, but she recognized it well: a full panic attack was coming. No matter how hard she fought, she was at the mercy of her terror. A hot trickle of shame pooled in her gut; she didn't want Zuko to see her like this.
A hand touched her arm, causing her to flinch. "I can help, if you want," he said quietly, and, it seemed, reluctantly.
She could barely choke out her answer. "Why would you?"
He was silent for so long she began to think he hadn't heard her. But then he said, "Because I once knew someone who had claustrophobia. I know what to do."
"How do I know I can trust you?" she said carefully, measuring out her words and breath with care.
"You don't," he said simply. "But no one else is down here. No one else can help you."
Mira was nothing if not stubborn. "I don't need your help."
There was a brief pause, then, "Are you sure about that?"
"No." The word slipped from her lips before she swallow it down. She took two deep breaths to steady herself. "How do I know you won't try to slit my throat?"
"We're both stuck down here. We're the best chance the other has of getting out. Besides," he added quietly. "I'm not my sister."
That convinced her. Quickly, before she could change her mind, she nodded. "Do it, then." She lifted her head, but kept her gaze down. "Help me."
He knelt before her, and Mira flinched slightly, turning her head to keep the cloth of the hood between them. If he noticed the movement, he didn't mention it. She kept utterly still as he lifted his hands to her temples. He didn't try to tilt her face up, as if he sensed her reluctance to leave the hood. The pads of his fingers were rough against her skin, and they gradually began to warm as he slowly rubbed small circles along her temples. The heat sank through her pores to the muscle below, and it spread like liquid down her veins. Her joints loosened and her stomach untwisted, almost against its own accord. The thudding in her chest did not seem quite so insistent as she let out a slow sigh of relief.
Zuko's hands fell to his side. "Better?"
"Much," she said with relish. "I'd forgotten what that felt like." She regretted the words as soon as she said them.
"You've had a firebender do that before?"
She shrugged with a false calmness. "Maybe."
He stared at her for a moment, and Mira had to squelch down the urge to fidget. At long last, he seemed to accept her explanation. He pulled back and began to cross to him side of the cave. Without thinking, she stood up and called out to him. "Why're you here?"
He stopped, but didn't turn back. "What?"
"I know why I'm here," Mira said. "Friend of the Avatar and all that. But what I don't get is why you're here. Azula's your sister; you're Prince of the Fire Nation. So…why're you here?"
"I don't know why," he said sharply, but the bitterness in his voice told her that perhaps he did.
So she did something very stupid. "Liar."
There was an infinitesimal pause before Zuko whipped around and stormed up to her. "What did you say?" he hissed, his face entirely too close to Mira for her liking.
Common sense told her she should be terrified, but she just felt curious and maybe even slightly amused. This little prince didn't scare her; she could protect herself from him well enough. "I called you a liar," she answered calmly. "Go ahead, strike me down if you want. Azula's using me for bait only until Aang gets here. In fact, she may be planning my untimely demise as we speak. You or her, doesn't matter; I'll die anyway. Makes no difference to me how I go." She was lying through her teeth, of course. But she was excellent at bluffing.
He said nothing for the longest time, eyes fixed on her hood, as if a hard enough stare could allow him to see through it to the face underneath. Slowly, the angry tension drained from his body, to be replaced with a probing wariness. "Who are you?" he asked finally, tilting his head as he scrutinized her.
"Who I am doesn't matter," she dismissed. "I'm nobody. But you're deflecting," she said, pointing an accusing finger at him. "You know why you're here. You just don't want to face it."
"Why does it matter?" he countered. "Why should I tell you, anyway? You're nobody. You travel with the Avatar!" he said, pouncing on the excuse not to trust her.
"We're both trapped down here," Mira pointed out. "Alliances don't really matter at this point, do they? And like you said, we're each other's best hope of getting out, yeah? So really, what's the harm in telling me? I'm nobody."
Zuko looked like he was sorely tempted to test her. But at least a few of her words must have pierced his shell, because he sank down onto a nearby rock. Mira followed his lead and when they were both settled, tried again. "So…why are you here?"
Zuko gazed was fixed firmly on his feet as he answered. "After the Siege of the Northern Water Tribe, my uncle and I were adrift for days. We landed on a corner of the Earth Kingdom, and we spent a few days recovering. Then…Azula showed up. She said that my banishment was over, and that I was welcome home." He broke off bitterly, his eyes nearly burning through the ground.
"Of course you believed her," Mira supplied. "Why wouldn't you?"
Zuko seemed to take strength from the affirmation that he hadn't been naïve in trusting his sister. "We were almost on the ship," he recalled, his gaze unfocused. "And the helmsman told the Royal Guard to set sail with the—prisoners."
"She was there to capture you."
Zuko nodded. "We fought, and we got away." He paused, his brow furrowed as he thought. "Azula may hate me, but she could never outright attack me," he muttered absently.
Mira nodded. "You're the firstborn son. Even though you're banished, you are the rightful heir to the throne. She can't depose you without risking major rebellion, not to mention abdicating her own claim to the crown." A surprised look crossed Zuko's face for an instant, as if he couldn't believe a gutterflower would have such a grasp on foreign politics (well, Mira wasn't actually a real gutterflower, but he didn't know that). He nodded at her words again, and Mira kept going. "The only way Azula could have rightly gone after you was if she'd been ordered to. And the only person Azula takes orders from is the Fire Lord. Your father."
The pained look on Zuko's face told her he'd figured as much out for himself. So that was why he was so angry, Mira mused. I'd be pissed off too, if I were him.
"We went on the run," Zuko continued, avoiding the topic. "We came to Ba Sing Se. Uncle thought we could have a normal life."
"I suppose that's shot to bits," Mira said. She snickered. "You with a normal life. I'd pay to see that."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
She laughed. "Oh, come on! I mean, you're you. All angst-ridden and formal and serious. What were you doing in Ba Sing Se anyway?"
His cheeks colored and he looked away. "Nothing." His face hardened. "I don't have to answer to you."
"Oh, I know. I just enjoy making others uncomfortable." Poking and prodding him was also the best way to judge his mental state, but she wasn't about to tell him that. Instead she said, "How about this: you told me yours, so I'll tell you mine."
He didn't say anything, but he didn't protest, either. Mira chose to take that as a go-ahead. "You know I wasn't with Aang in the beginning. I joined shortly after they landed in the Earth Kingdom. Little squirt saved my life—well, just my hand, I guess. So I joined up with him."
"If it's a life debt that ties you to him, surely that's been fulfilled already?"
A ghost of a smile flitted over her face. "Y'know, when I first joined, I thought maybe that's all it was. That, and a greater chance to help others. But now…it's so much more than that. They're naïve, yes, and idealistic as hell, but there's something about them—they care so much about others. You can't help but get caught up in that, even when you're as cynical as I am."
"Why are you telling me this?" Zuko sounded bored, but there was an undercurrent of suspicion there as well.
"You need to hear about them from someone just like you."
Zuko sneered at her. "You're nothing like me."
Mira's eyes flashed as a slow, creeping anger flooded her body. She viciously yanked at the strips of leather wrapped around her burns. They coiled to the floor as she stalked over to Zuko and shoved her arms in her face. "Don't you dare tell me we're nothing alike," she said coldly. "You don't get to make that call."
Zuko's eyes widened as he took in the thick, ropy burns that traced her skin. "I—didn't know," he said quietly.
"Of course you didn't," Mira said, pulling her sleeves down and retreating back to her bench. "Because you're so wrapped up in yourself that you don't pay attention to what's going on around you."
"Hold on—"
"You're Prince of the Fire Nation, but do you even bother to look around and see what this war's done to your people? I'm not even talking about your opponents; I'm talking about your very own citizens! This war has torn apart the world, but you're only concerned with how you fit in the picture."
Zuko shot to his feet. "I know," he said loudly, cutting her off. "I've seen it, I know."
"Then why the hell are you still on Azula's side?!"
"I'm not!" He froze, then hastily backtracked. "I mean, I'm not with her, but I'm not—" Conflict and surprised shock was written all across his face. "I don't know."
Mira was silent for a moment. "What're you gonna do?"
He stared her, still looking a little baffled. "I don't know," he repeated.
She shrugged. "I'll take it." After a moment, she added, "I didn't mean to yell at you. Well," she amended, "yeah, I did…but maybe I should have put it differently."
He gave her a funny look. "Why are you apologizing to me?"
"Well, you're a person, aren't you? Even if you've done some awful things, you're still not as bad as Ozai."
Zuko seemed caught in an internal monologue. "But…he's my father."
"So? A father who burns his own child isn't worth any loyalty. I should know."
Zuko's head shot up. "How do you know my father burned me?"
Mira shrugged. "You were banished around the same time you got that scar. It's not that hard to put the pieces together."
Zuko nodded, but his brow was furrowed. "Wait a second…you said, 'I should know.' What's that supposed to mean?"
Mira's blood ran cold and sweat bloomed on her forehead. She hadn't really said that, had she? Oh, shit, she had. Maybe Zuko wouldn't make the connection…
"Wait." Well, there went that hope. "You would know if you were in the same situation…" His eyes widened. "Your father's a firebender. You're Fire Nation?!"
Mira swore aloud this time, and that was all the confirmation Zuko needed. The look on his face would have been comical if Mira wasn't so busy cursing her own stupidity.
"But…you travel with the Avatar."
"They don't know," Mira said woodenly. "Of course they don't know. No one does." She looked at him. "Except for you."
Zuko didn't quite know how to take that. "Why would you tell me?"
"It's not like I planned to, genius." She rolled her eyes. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell the others, when they show up."
"How do you know I won't?"
"I guess I'll just have to trust you," she said simply.
"Wait a minute…how do you know they'll come?"
"It's Aang. He knows he shouldn't, but he will anyway."
"And you still follow him?"
"Someone's got to be the voice of reason. If I left, they'd probably get themselves killed the very next day."
"You probably shouldn't be telling me this."
"Probably not. Still not sure what you're going to do?" Zuko said nothing, so she continued. "Well, let me say this: You know what I think, but I won't try to tell you which side to choose." He started a bit and shot her a bemused look. "It's not my decision. I can rant to you all day about how much I hate Ozai, but that doesn't matter to you. What matters is what feels right. If that means joining with your sister, well...that's up to you. I genuinely hope it doesn't come to that, but who knows? Just…make sure it's what you want, okay? Coming from someone who's been in a very similar position—" Zuko's eyes flicked down to her arms, "—I can say that I know how a decision like this feels. You can consider everyone you care about, but you come first. Trust me on this." Her voice cracked on the last sentence, and Zuko's eyes suddenly narrowed.
"Hold on," he said slowly. "Do I—"
He never got the chance to finish as the shriek of stone scraping together pierced the air. Mira whipped her head around to stare at the section of wall next to the tunnel entrance. It wouldn't be the Dai Li, or they'd have used the front door. Which could mean this could only be…
"Aang," she groaned as he came into view. Katara stood next to him, as did Iroh. His eyes found his nephew immediately and he rushed forward, leaving Mira to speak with her friends. "You shouldn't be here," she said sharply.
Aang, who'd been moving towards her, stumbled back like he'd been slapped. "I—what?"
"You need to leave, now," she insisted. "Agni, why did you come?" She ran a hand through her hair, shaking her head. "Of all the stupid, boneheaded moves—"
"Hey!" Katara said. "He saw a vision of you in trouble and left to come rescue you!"
"Which is exactly what Azula wants!" Mira hissed. She jabbed a finger at him. "Why do you think I'm not dead yet?"
"Well, then, we'd better leave now," Aang said, as if it were that simple.
Mira let out a derisive laugh, which drew the attention of Zuko and his uncle. "Dammit, Aang, you just don't get it! This isn't about me, this is about the entire world. Leave me behind if that's what it takes, but get out of here!"
"Mira, he's just trying to save you—"
"I don't want to be saved!" Her words thundered through the cave, bouncing off the crystals and slamming back into her like a physical blow. A thick silence followed in their wake as several pairs of eyes watched her. She screwed her eyes shut against their stares as her fingers curled into fists. "Don't you pity me," she said, ashamed to hear her voice shake. "Don't you dare. I don't deserve it."
"What are you talking about?" Katara's voice was gentle, and that made things about ten million times worse.
"You don't know me," Mira said bitterly. "You don't know who I am, what I've done. If you did, you wouldn't look at me like that. You'd leave me behind without a second thought."
"No, we wouldn't," Aang said gently, taking a step forward and reaching for her.
She shied away and brought her arm up in front of her. "Wouldn't you?" Her fingers splayed out, then slowly closed as her chest expanded with a deep breath. And for the first time in three years, the fire in her belly sparked to life. The power nearly bowled her over, the rush was so potent. A consequence of suppressing your bending for three years, she supposed. Smoke trickled from her nostrils as she exhaled; at the same time she snapped her fingers back out with a flick of her wrist, and a small flame exploded into her hand.
Aang and Katara froze as the sound of the crackling fire took over the room. Mira watched, feeling a little bit tipsy from the power. Agni's bloody bones, she'd forgotten what this felt like. Damn.
"You see?" she said, still somewhat giddy. "I'm a thief and a liar and a firebender. You shouldn't trust me. Leave me here and go."
Katara's eyes flicked up to meet hers, her steady blue eyes a boiling ocean of anger. "Yeah," she said. "You're a liar. And yes, I'm furious that you didn't tell us. But if this is some ruse so you can sacrifice yourself, you can forget it."
The fire sputtered and died as Mira stared stupidly at Katara. Whatever she'd been expecting, it wasn't that.
"Did you really think we'd leave you behind?" Aang said, sounding hurt. "You saved my life. You saved all our lives. That doesn't just go away because you're a firebender." He looked at her, gray eyes full of compassion, and Mira nearly burst into tears then and there.
But she didn't, because she didn't cry, dammit. Once the hot prickle had faded from her eyes, she straightened up. "I don't believe you, but okay," she said. "Let's get you somewhere safe." She turned and looked at Zuko. "Come with us."
"What?!"
Mira didn't even turn her head. "Shut up, Kat, I'm talking to him."
Zuko met her gaze with astonishment, his mouth hanging open. Mira saw an opportunity and took in. "As a citizen of the Fire Nation, I implore you, don't stand aside and let Azula win. You know her reign will be even more destructive than Ozai's already is. You've seen the damage this war has done. Now you've got the opportunity to end it."
"I—don't…"
Iroh stepped forward before he could finish. "Zuko, perhaps it is time we talked." He looked to Aang. "Go help your friends. We will catch up."
Aang nodded and bowed respectfully, and Iroh did the same. Before Mira could say anything else, Katara grabbed her by the elbow and practically dragged her to the other side of the cave. As Aang opened a door in the wall, Katara hissed, "What were you thinking, inviting Zuko along?!"
"He was trapped down here with me, in case you hadn't noticed," Mira said balefully, rubbing her arm. "And I trust him."
"You trust him?!"
A glance over her shoulder revealed Iroh and Zuko deep in conversation, with the latter shooting several looks their way. Mira hastily turned back, hoping that the words she'd said were enough to sway Zuko's loyalty.
The tunnel they dashed down would have normally sent Mira's feet out from under her, but the adrenaline of the escape left no room for panic. Her heart sounded in her throat as her feet slapped the stone floor, reverberating into a cacophony that filled the air.
They were spat out into a cavern at least four times the size of Mira's prison. A huge waterfall took up one part of the wall to the left, and a small river cut through the middle to drain on the opposite side. Gargantuan crystals studded the floor and walls, while some dripped from the ceiling above. The whole area was lit by their eerie glow, giving the room the ethereal feel of an eternal twilight.
Katara led them toward the waterfall, saying, "We've got to find Sokka and Toph!"
Before she could sweep a hand out and propel them up through the waterfall, an all-too-familiar crackle sounded behind them. Aang turned mid-step and a wall of earth rose up to protect them. Once it fell, Azula could be seen standing not twenty feet away, hand out and smoking.
She did not hesitate to attack again. Mira dove to the left as Azula sent out a second wall of flame. An angry hiss cut through the air as Katara extinguished it with a flick of her hand. Seconds later, a tidal wave of water rocketed towards Azula, but the firebender merely clapped her hands together and flung them out to evaporate the liquid.
Mira, in the meantime, was on her feet and creeping around to Azula's back. She raised one hand and summoned a palm of fire as she walked forward. Now, if only Aang and Katara could keep her busy long enough…
Without any kind of warning, Azula whirled around and threw a fireball straight for Mira's chest. Mira yelped in alarm and abandoned her fire as she dived to the side. But while her body remained safe, her cloak was not as quick to escape. The fire nicked the corner of the fabric, catching fire instantly.
Now, in Mira's defense, she had been living as a non-bender for three years. Suppressing her bending (and her bending instincts) left quite a mark on her. If she'd been thinking clearly, she would have just swept her hand over the cloak, gathered up the fire, and let it dissipate harmlessly into the air. But Mira was still thinking like a non-bender, so she did what any other non-bender would have done: she ripped the cloak away from her body, forgetting completely about the hood and her desperate need to hide. The thought didn't even occur to her until she stood in the middle of the crystalline caverns, face exposed for the entire world to see.
Well, maybe just Azula. But that was enough.
"Shit." The oath bounced off the walls and amplified, stilling all motion in the cave. Azula was frozen, face caught between shocked surprise and pure rage. Katara and Aang looked wary, but Mira knew the reaction they expected to see was not the one they would get.
"You," Azula cried, eyes narrowed and nostrils flared. "But you're dead!"
"Am I?" Mira said, a little dazed. "Funny, you'd think I'd've stopped walking around by now." But inside, she was lurching. Dead? All these years, she'd been presumed dead? A funny little surge of anger cropped up; she hadn't needed the hood all those years? Well, that'd been a tremendous waste of paranoia. A little voice in her head told her that perhaps now was not the time to dwell on that, and she quickly snapped to attention.
Azula was still glaring at her with enough hatred that Mira could almost feel her skin burning. "Your father said you were dead," she hissed. "Was that a lie, or did you trick him as well?"
It all made sense to Mira now. Ozai's right hand man couldn't afford there to be any suspicion about his loyalty, and his daughter's sudden disappearance would have raised uncomfortable questions. Of course he'd cover up her disappearance with a lie. Knowing him, he'd probably blamed Earth Kingdom rebels and used her absence to his advantage.
Mira's teeth creaked as she ground them together. "Kurzu can rot in Heru, for all I care," she spat.
"He'll join you there," Azula growled, lunging forward.
But before she could reach Mira, and before Mira could summon flames to defend herself, another voice rang out into the clearing. Mira's stomach dropped, and for a dizzying second, she thought she might be sick. "Zam?"
It seemed that Zuko had decided to join them after all—though, it was entirely possible he'd arrived to assist Azula. But now…Agni knew what he might do now that he'd seen Mira.
All action in the cave ceased for the second time as all heads swiveled around to look at Zuko. His eyes, though, were glued to Mira's as a kaleidoscope of emotions danced across his face. Surprise, anger, shock, sadness, disbelief…all within a fraction of a second. Then his face settled into a neutral expression, one that meant he was feeling entirely too much and knew that he needed to control it. Mira should know. She'd seen it on him often enough.
She ignored Azula and stepped toward Zuko, hand out in a pleading gesture. "I am so sorry," she said quietly. "I should have told you. But, please…trust me."
For the briefest moment, Zuko's eyes went from a glassy gold to a raging inferno, roiling with anger and hatred and loathing. The force behind his gaze was so powerful, Mira was forced to take a step back. But as quickly as it had appeared, it vanished, leaving behind the blank stare.
Once again, Mira thought she might throw up. Every secret, every lie she'd told since the day she'd gotten her scars (and left her father behind) was laid open for the world to see. She may have felt naked without the cloak, but that was nothing compared to how she felt now. It was as though her skin had been stripped away, leaving only her beating heart exposed. There were no walls, no comfortable secrets to keep others out. They saw everything, every ugly part Mira had tried to push away or ignore. There was no pretending now—and Mira hated every second of it.
But most of all, she hated that Zuko wouldn't show anything other than a neutral interest. He refused to let her in, and suddenly, she understood all of Katara's frustration. It was maddening, caring about someone and wanting them to let you in, but knowing that you couldn't help unless they really wanted you to. And Mira was terrified that Zuko wouldn't let her explain why she'd done what she'd done, especially when it seemed like the most important thing in the world.
Mira opened her mouth to say something—what, exactly, she wasn't quite sure—when a small, delicate hand wrapped itself around her throat and began to squeeze. "I thought you were dead," Azula hissed, teeth bared in a snarl. "But no matter. I can fix that." Her fingers tightened, and a choked yelp bubbled up from Mira's throat.
Azula's grip was unbreakable as Mira tried to get enough leverage to pull her off. No amount of force could pry the hand off her neck, so Mira could only settled for carving deep cuts in the backs of Azula's hands. The younger girl hissed in pain, but merely clenched her teeth and applied even more pressure. A scratchy wheeze escaped her lips, and Mira's eyes darted around the cavern, trying to find help.
Her hopes were quickly squashed as she caught sight of both Aang and Katara engaged with the Dai Li (when had they shown up? It must have been when Zuko had arrived—they were stealthy enough that it was entirely possible Mira hadn't noticed their arrival). There was no way either of them could break away to come to her aid.
That left Zuko, but things between them were so royally screwed up that Mira doubted he'd help her. But as her lungs began to burn and her face grew to an unhealthy shade of pink, Mira realized that she had no other choice. Her eyes found his as she sent a silent plea across the cave. She might have felt a tear slide down her cheek, but it was hard to tell, what with her entire face feeling hot and prickly from oxygen deprivation.
Her eyelids fluttered as the edges of her vision grew black. Bright spots danced before her eyes. Her hands, still trying to pry Azula's loose, grew heavy and slack. They slowly sank down, despite her brain screaming at them to keep working. She felt weak, as though her bones were made of lead. They dragged her down to the ground, and she almost felt like once she hit it, she'd pass right on through and keep falling forever. The blackness continued to overtake her vision as her eyes rolled into the back of her head. Her lead-filled limbs went limp, and she was falling down into blackness and nothingness.
…She was dying.
The realization hit her with a vengeance, as did the reaction. NO! Her consciousness, which had started to wander away, slammed back into her body with force. She gave an almighty jerk as her hands shot up to her throat…but they met only bruised skin. At the same moment, her lungs attempted to inhale once again. This time, they were allowed to. They sucked in oxygen greedily, then stuttered as they took in maybe a little too much at once. Mira's body was wracked with a fit of coughing, and she internally winced at the ragged sound. With every gulp of air that did manage to fill her chest, her vision began to clear. A face hovered in front of her, and as the stars swam away, she realized with a start that it was Zuko.
She squinted up at him, eyebrows drawn in confusion. For all the hope she'd had that he would save her, deep down, she hadn't really expected him to.
If I were him, I wouldn't have saved me…
She opened her mouth to ask him why, but nothing came out. She tried again, face pinched, but could only produce a squeaky wheeze. "Save your energy," Zuko said, his voice clipped. "You'll have time to explain later. Believe me," he added darkly. For the first time, Mira saw the Fire Prince who had managed to strike such fear in her friends' hearts. She could see it, but she herself wasn't afraid. Zuko could never scare her, and perhaps that was why he looked so angry.
Mira pushed herself up onto one elbow and scanned the cave. Several Dai Li agents surrounded Katara, who was handling them all with fierce ease. Aang and Azula were now locked in an intense battle near the waterfall, neither side giving ground. What was needed were reinforcements. Mira stood shakily, determined to help either (or both) of her friends. Her feet seemed to have other plans, as they tangled together and would have brought her crashing down if it weren't for Zuko's hand around her elbow. "I can walk," she snapped. Or, at least, tried to snap. The reality sounded more like another round of hacking coughs, so she settled for a soft glare while yanking her arm back.
She inhaled deeply to flood her body with oxygen as she watched the fight before her. Zuko left her side to join Katara in her fight against the Dai Li, and Azula was attacking a pile of bizarrely arranged crystal. An eerie light emanated from within. It didn't take a genius to figure that Aang was most likely inside. Mira took two steps forward to distract Azula and give Aang whatever time he needed, but the crystal exploded outward before she could.
Aang drifted high into the air, eyes whitewashed and a scowl on his face. Mira could feel a small smile tugging at her lips as she watched. Aang in the Avatar state was a force to be reckoned with. Azula didn't stand a chance.
But everything went terribly wrong in a single instant.
An ear-splitting crack echoed through the cave as a streak of white-hot lightning raced through the air, jumping from Azula's fingertips to the center of Aang's back. He gave a violent twitch as the scowl was replaced with a twisted expression of pain. Aang convulsed as the lightning wreaked havoc on his insides, searching for a way out. Smoke trailed through the air as he fell, leaving behind the scent of singed flesh.
Mira only vaguely registered Katara's scream of grief as the waterbender raced to catch him. She was too busy staring at Azula, who remained where she was, a merciless smile on her face. The longer Mira watched, the angrier she got. But this time, she didn't try to hold back. She didn't find a corner to meditate in as she tried to coax down the fire in her gut. No, this time…she let it loose. Her anger ran free, and with it went her self-control. A haze of ugly red settled over her vision as blood boiled in her veins.
Mira would look back years from now and still not remember clearly what happened. One moment, she was standing still, watching Aang fall, and the next, she was attacking Azula with a fury she didn't know she had.
Aang was dead, and it was Azula's fault. This thought, this reason for revenge, was only eclipsed by shock. Never in all this time had Mira contemplated Aang dying. He was so open and honest and caring…he seemed untouchable, as though Death had no hold on him. But as she'd just seen, that was untrue. He'd fallen under Azula's hand.
She would die for that.
Fire erupted from her palms and streaked through the air toward Azula, but the younger girl merely flipped and twisted and dodged with maddening ease. Nothing could touch her as she sent the same back toward Mira. Sweat poured down her face as she moved, ignoring the protests from her overextended body.
A stroke of brilliance happened upon Mira. She'd been relying on her old firebending forms to fight, and while they were useful, they were also predictable. That's why she couldn't touch Azula. But if she mixed it up, threw something knew in there…
Something in her brain shifted, and suddenly, Mira wasn't in a bending fight. She was a boxer, using the fire as an extension of her arm. Hands close to the face, knees bent, eyes searching for an in. She lashed out and swept aside any fireballs that grew too close, and once she caught an opportunity, she took it.
Her right hand darted out in a low uppercut aimed for the ribs. Fist didn't meet skin, of course, but a jet of flame hurried to do the job. But, dammit, Azula was faster again and darted to the side.
Mira brought her hands down, but Azula had disappeared. It was a little disorienting, actually. Where was she?
A pair of hands violently grabbed Mira's left forearm and twisted it behind her back. A wheezy squeak escaped her lips as pain lanced through her shoulder. "Interesting," Azula remarked coolly. "I didn't expect you to be up and fighting so soon." One hand released her and came up to wrap around the bruise on Mira's neck. Mira jerked fiercely, forcing Azula to remove her hand in order to maintain her grip. "I wonder…" Azula mused. "How much pain can you take before you completely give up?"
More than you'll ever know…
Mira braced herself and viciously yanked her arm away, and with a sickening crack, her shoulder popped out of place. The pain was a red-hot dagger puncturing the joint, but Mira was forced to bite her lip and shove it aside in favor of escape. Her left arm dangled uselessly by her side as she whirled and punched with her right. She caught Azula straight across the jaw, knocking the princess off her feet. She collapsed to the ground but wasn't out for good. Mira had only stunned her.
"Go!" An authoritative voice cut through the chaos, and Mira turned to see Iroh standing opposite the Dai Li agents. He looked back at the others, and repeated his command. "Go! I'll hold them off!"
"Uncle!" Zuko cried. He abandoned the agents he was fighting and took three steps towards him.
"Go, nephew!" Iroh cried. His eyes landed on Mira, and only the slightest widening of his eyes indicated that he recognized her. He gestured her way and said, "Help her. Go with the others. I will be fine."
Indecision clouded Zuko's face. After a few moments, he nodded uncertainly and ran to Mira's side.
"I'm fine," she tried to say. But as she exhaled, another round of coughing racked her slender frame. She swayed as she tried to step forward, and stars burst before her eyes. She'd overdone it with the firebending. It'd been a bit of a boneheaded move, fighting Azula five minutes after facing certain death (she'd have done it again in a heartbeat, though). But as it was, she had perhaps a few minutes before she collapsed.
Her throat throbbed angrily, like a collar of molten metal had been poured around it. Everything hurt, but she couldn't let it distract her. What mattered now was getting out of here.
She tensed as a hand that wasn't Zuko's touched her shoulder. A Dai Li agent stood behind her, and Mira froze. There was no way she could fight him in this condition.
But, as it turned out, she wouldn't have to.
Staring back at her was the young Dai Li agent she'd encountered on the streets of Ba Sing Se so many weeks ago. Even more importantly, he wasn't looking at her with disdain, or anger. Instead, an overpowering urgency shone in his pale green eyes, and Mira's defenses fell.
"Follow me," he said quietly, and Mira nodded. Zuko drew closer to her right side, casting a wary glance at the agent who looked so similar to the ones he'd just fought.
"Trust me," she said. Or would have said, if she'd had the ability. As it was, she would had to settle for a meaningful glance and hope that the message got across.
It must have, as Zuko trailed after her as she followed the Dai Li agent. Mira could feel her legs wobble under her as she ran, and she could only pray that her strength lasted until they were safe. She grit her teeth as every step she took jostled her shoulder. If she could ignore the pain, for just a little while longer…
The agent skidded to a stop at the edge of the cavern. He reached out a hand and felt along the stone wall, as if searching for something. "What are you doing?" Zuko asked tersely, glancing over his shoulder every now and again to make sure they hadn't been followed.
"Trying to find the latch," the agent grunted.
"Can't you just earthbend the wall open?"
"Not an earthbender." So that was why Mira never saw him with rock gloves and why he'd been armed only with a sword. He was a lowly Tamashi, a spirit-fighter (and one of the lowest ranks within the Dai Li).
"So we're trapped?" Zuko said angrily.
"Ba Sing Se isn't just full of earthbenders," the Dai Li agent snapped. "We've got our own ways out." As soon as he finished speaking, there was grinding click, and a portion of the wall slid away to reveal a long, narrow tunnel leading up. Mira felt woozy just looking inside.
"That tunnel should lead you aboveground," the agent explained. "Now hit me."
Mira blinked stupidly at him.
"It needs to look like you escaped," he explained quickly. "I can't be blamed for this."
Mira nodded, but her arms felt like they were filled with stones. She severely doubted that she would have the energy to raise her one good arm above her head, much less knock the agent out. She looked at Zuko and tilted her head to the agent as if to say, would you like to do the honors?
He nodded sharply and picked a good-sized rock up off the ground. After hefting it in his hands, he looked to the agent, who squeezed his eyes shut and braced himself. Zuko struck him hard across the forehead, and the agent collapsed.
Mira looked back at the tunnel and a wave of exhaustion and fear crashed over her. Her eyelids fluttered and she could feel her body giving up.
Her feet swept out from underneath her, but she didn't hit the ground. Arms were tucked firmly underneath her knees and back. She struggled weakly against Zuko's grip, but the motion jostled her dislocated shoulder, and the pain overwhelmed her. Her eyes slid shut of their own accord, and she slipped clumsily into unconsciousness.
A/N: Side note—Heru is my spirit-world equivalent of hell.
Before you write reviews and send messages full of questions, let me say this: everything will be explained in full next chapter. And I do mean everything. So if you're confused, good! I didn't give you the full story; I saved that for next chapter.
I know there may be some of you who are unhappy with this chapter (though I desperately hope that's not the case), especially regarding Mira's connection to Zuko. I will say again: this is not a romance. It was never intended to be. But, it you feel that you cannot continue on without knowing the final relationships, please send me a message and I will answer any questions you may have. I do hope that you will choose to keep reading and let the story unfold as it may.
Again, I am very hesitant about this chapter. Personally, I love it, and I've decided that's all that matters. Please, let me know how what you think!
Excerpt from next chapter:
"I was trying to protect you the best way I knew how."
"That was my decision to make."
"Maybe it was, but I did what I did. I can't change the past, and honestly? Maybe things turned out for the best for us."
"How can you say that?"
"Well…you're with us now…aren't you?"