Disclaimer: I don't own them. I just like to play with them.

Oh and Em, don't you dare threaten me. You won't like the repercussions. *wicked grin*

Chapter Five

BPOV

The weeks flew by. And thankfully Emmett McCarty got the picture and backed the hell off. I didn't need him adding to my already stressful life.

My parents were as I suspected, less than thrilled with my methods, although my mother was quickly warming to the idea. The way she saw it, she got her wish regardless of how it came to be. My dad, was a bit tougher. He wanted me to get married and all that ish. I really didn't need that drama in my life.

Men were douche-bags, except my daddy. He was wonderful.

I had, had my share of idiots walk in and out of my life to know that I would be fine doing this on my own.

Take Tyler for instance, we were happy. At least I thought we were, until I came home early from work one day to find him screwing some bimbo in our bed.

Needless to say that didn't end prettily.

Then there was Paulo, the Italian who wreaked havoc on my life. I had fallen completely in love with him, and him seemingly so with me. I should've known something was up when I insisted we go to Italy to meet his family. You see, the dick had proposed to me, and I being the idiot I was, thought it would be better if I met his parents before hand.

He had met my parents. Rene had loved him, of course, but my dad Charlie, bless him, hated him the moment he laid eyes on him.

"Something's off with this guy Bells," he had said to me.

I brushed it off as the whole dad wanting me to be his little girl forever thing.

Boy was I wrong. Turns out Paulo the skeez was already married. To a beautiful Italian woman, and they had two beautiful children to complete the package. Paulo was only using me to get citizenship.

That was my last straw. I went on a man sabbatical. I completely immersed myself into my work and forgot about men. This didn't curb my need to become a mother however, so that's where the idea of artificial insemination blossomed.

So that brings us back to the present where I was sitting on the toilet floor, spilling my guts literally into the bowl. Edward was standing nearby with a sympathetic look on his face.

It had been four weeks to the day, that I had been turkey basted and my period was late. I was never late.

"You finished?" Edward asked, handing me a wet washcloth.

I nodded, not trusting to open my mouth just yet.

"I think it's time you call the doctor sweetie," he said crouching next to me with the phone in his hand.

I think he was right. I had been trying to put this off, but for days I had been in this same position. I was having Emmett's child.

I was happy and completely sad at the same time.

I was still convinced God was punishing me.

I took the phone from Edward and called Dr. Gerandy's office.

-.-TA-.-

EmPOV

I hadn't heard or seen Isabella Swan for weeks. I thought maybe it was a good idea to back off for a bit. Give her some space. It wasn't as though we were the best of friends or anything.

My mother was watching me over her tea cup at breakfast.

"Are you ok dear?" she asked.

I looked up at her, "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"You've been awfully quiet these past few weeks," she said buttering her toast.

"I haven't had much to say," I said. "Besides nothing I say matters much anymore."

I spared a look at my father, who was buried in the newspaper. He didn't even bother looking at me. I sighed heavily and turned back to my mother.

"I've just had a lot on my mind mom," I said.

"You can still talk to us dear," she said reaching for my father's hand. "We love you very much."

Yeah. Right.

"Master Emmett, there's a phone call for you," George, our butler announced.

"We're at breakfast," my father said.

"Yes sir, but the person on the phone says it's a matter of great importance," George said.

"Who is calling?" Bernard asked.

"Dr. Gerandy," the butler replied.

My mother gasped and her hands flew up to her chest, "Are you sick darling?"

"Wouldn't be a surprise," my father said. "Probably caught something from one of those whores he's always dealing with."

That hurt. Bad.

Is that what my father really thought of me?

"Bernard McCarty!" my mother cried. "Don't you dare insinuate such a thing."

"I'm glad you think so highly of me dad," I said pushing back my chair. "George I'll take the call in the study."

George nodded and exited as quietly as he had entered.

I stalked over to the study and slammed the door behind me. My father was a mean prick, but I couldn't focus on that right now. I was wondering why Dr. Gerandy was calling. I hadn't heard him since the day in his office.

I took up the phone. "Dr. Gerandy, Emmett McCarty, what's wrong?"

I listened as the doctor spoke, and five minutes later I hung up the phone and flopped into the chair.

Bella Swan was pregnant.

A/N: Mickeyluver33 I wouldn't torture you all with six long weeks...pfft I don't have the patience for that, neither does Em lol

No, Alice and Edward are not together. Is Edward gay? I'm not sure yet lmao KimberlyAnnT.

Emmett can be a moron at times Nonita...lol

I wish she would slap him, good and hard Cevvin. And yes, we'd all be tempted to rub other parts of him ;)

No probs sacoyawild ;)

Things have a way of working themselves out hun, and nine months is a long time jessa76 :)

MarieOne...I love how your mind works and since a certain monkeyman has been rude to me recently...the punishment will continue :D

KCLutz445 you'll have to hold Em close (not that you're gonna mind), he needs to be taught a lesson.

scigeekgirl, yes...I'm kinda tired of reading all these stories where Bella is the 'woe is me, 'i can't do anything' 'oh i'm so retarted and need a man to live my life for me' Bella. My Bella will always have a backbone :D

That's about it for now. Will probably update a little later. I'm in that writing mood so yay! *smooches*