A/N: I still don't know what this is other than fun.
Disclaimer: I don't own.
"I didn't mean to marry your sister," Zuko said angrily as Sokka pulled him closer. Katara thought that they were much closer than she and Zuko had been since their apparent nuptials but she shrugged it off (not to mention she was a little miffed at Zuko's tone).
"Are you saying you're too good for Katara?!" Sokka accused.
"I'd choose my next words carefully if I were you," June warned as she continued to sip her tea.
"Why should Zuko choose his words carefully? He's kind of bad at that," Aang said as he flew into the room on a puff of air.
Katara watched Zuko swallow hard again and opened her mouth to gently and tactfully tell Aang what happened but June beat her to it. "Pouty and his girlfriend got married last night."
"But Zuko doesn't have a girlfriend," Aang insisted.
"She means Katara," Toph clarified as she joined the rest of the group. "Pour me a cup," she told June. June smirked at the younger woman and dutifully poured her a cup. She held her own up to Toph who saluted her as well.
"Why would Katara marry Zuko? They only went on one date and-"
Katara cut Aang off with "we all promised never to speak of that again! Sokka, let go of Zuko. You can't kill him."
"Why?" Sokka whined.
"First of all he's your brother-in-law until we undo this and family is important," Katara began.
"Second Azula is my heir right now and even though she'd doing better I don't want her to be Fire Lord," Zuko said as he stood and straightened out his clothes. "Third because if you kill me then Katara will be a widow-"
"You're not helping," Katara said as she glared at Zuko.
"I'm still not the one who got us into this mess."
"I was trying to be nice and appreciate other people's customs. Oh but what would you know about that? All you know is how to take over other!"
"I've been the first Fire Lord in one hundred years to reduce the size of the Fire Nation! And if I didn't appreciate other cultures I wouldn't have participated in the celebration for bringing in the first whale of the season!"
Katara made a loud frustrated noise and kept sputtering "you" at Zuko. Toph grinned and June turned to look at the blind girl. "Twenty gold pieces says they end up killing each other," June offered.
Toph firmly planted her feet on the ground. "Fifty says they end up never dissolving the marriage," Toph countered.
"You're on."
"Maybe we should break them up now," Aang said as he watched the two fight.
"On it Twinkletoes."
"But I wanted Katara to freeze him in a block of ice," Sokka moaned.
"There, there, I'm sure Katara will do that soon," Suki said in a soothing tone. "Also thank you for letting go of Zuko so I wouldn't have had to rescue him from you."
Sokka's eyes went wide with hurt. "You'd betray me like that?"
Suki sighed and sat down the bench next to Toph. "I don't want to but Zuko never technically relieved the Kyoshi Warriors from being his guard so therefore I'm honor bound to protect him."
"Fine. Hey Katara stop yelling so we can come up with a plan!" Toph emphasized Sokka's words by encasing both Katara and Zuko in earth up to their shoulders. "Thank you Toph. Now we need to come up with a plan to make sure as few people as-"
"June already sent out notifications last night," Zuko said miserably.
"Ok new plan: damage control. Maybe June can get some of the letters back-"
"I find people not things," June interjected.
"I'll give you my uncle's weight in gold if you find these," Zuko said.
June thought a moment. "Not enough."
"Then I won't have you arrested for slander and treason," Zuko countered.
"Sorry, Fire Lord, but I renounced my citizenship years ago."
Aang looked between the two. "How did you even know she was Fire Nation?"
"I guessed." Everyone stared at Zuko. "What? It was a very good guess! She came on my ship without batting an eyelash and this is a border area between the Fire Nation colonies and the Earth Kingdom. Stop looking so surprised and let's come up with a plan."
Aang was the first to recover. "Zuko's right. Toph let them go so we can all sit down and talk." Toph stomped her foot and the earth columns crumbled. "Ok so no getting the letters back and you two want to get unmarried."
"We need the swampbenders," Katara said as she brushed dirt from her clothes. "And we need to warn both the Fire Nation and Dad about our impending break up and start the process of ending this thing."
"We're going to need to split up," Sokka said as he took a seat next to Suki. "To get this done as quickly as possible we're going to need the swampbenders and people to go to the South Pole and Fire Nation."
"That's great but we only have Appa for transportation for you guys," Aang said.
Zuko rubbed his forehead. "We'll all take Appa to the nearest airship base and from there I'll get airships for those who need them."
"So who goes where?" Suki asked.
"I'm with you!" Sokka volunteered.
"Katara and Zuko should stay together and go to the Fire Nation," Toph said.
"Why?" Katara asked snidely.
"A wife follows her husband wherever he goes," Zuko offered. Katara bent the tea out of June's cup and frozen it over Zuko's mouth. His cries of distress were muffled by the ice and he kept pointing to Katara and gesturing for her to undo her bending.
"Melt it," she said sweetly. Zuko glared at her. "Anyway I think I should go to the South Pole to talk to Dad about this."
Sokka shrugged. "Yeah, he's probably can't believe you're married."
"What's that supposed to mean? I know I'm older than Mom was when they got married but really eighteen isn't that old and-"
"Woah, woah, it's not your age it's that you got married away from home. As for going with Zuko-"
"She has to come with me because she's going to need to sign the papers that end our marriage and I'm sure that's going to be easier than whatever we have to do for everyone else," Zuko said after managing to finally melt the tea away. He was rewarded with a wet, stained shirt.
Katara sighed. "Fine I'll go with my husband. Who's going to go find the swampbenders?"
"Leave that to me and Aang," Toph said. "Snoozles can deal with your dad."
"Great! That's all settled! How about we write each other in two weeks?" Everyone nodded. Now that's settled let's get some breakfast and head out!" Sokka suggested.
"We have a fruit basket we'll bring and we're going now. I want to get this over with," Zuko said. Everyone else agreed and they went to gather their things and prepare to leave.
June grabbed Toph's arm as she stood to leave. "I'll have my money in two weeks."
"I'll have mine in a month."
Thank you to everyone who reviewed, alerted, or favorited this story or me! I'm not sure about updates...I have one of those real person jobs that's about to get a lot more busy very quickly but we'll see. Reviews are awesome.
Second note: Changed a little thing because I was rereading this and found an inconsistency in my own plot line. I should really plan out better.