Chapter 3: A Little Old Fashioned Competition
October 10th, 2185
CIC Deck, SR-2 Normandy
Steve still couldn't quite wipe the giant, semi permanent grin off his face that had been plastered there for over a week. Walking back from the cockpit of the ship with her rather sarcastic pilot after taking in the fantastic view, the soldier had a feeling something was up when Jacob ran to the elevator and stuck his hand into the door before it could close. "Sorry, forgot something downstairs." Rogers' nodded at the excuse, but Steve's senses were on alert when he felt a phantom hand pass over his lower back.
"Oh, pardon me Rogers. Couldn't resist." Kasumi chortled when Steve jumped away from the thief's seemingly 'innocent' gesture. He made it a point to make sure she hadn't pulled something from his pants pockets, and wasn't surprised when he found his 'credit chit', what passed for money now, was missing.
Steve rolled his blue eyes, shrugging his shoulders before she could say another word. "Already told the Commander I don't need charity." He knew he was in trouble though when, once again, the elevator refrained from moving as the doors opened and allowed Miranda and Commander Shepard into the rapidly crowding lift. He had a feeling he knew what they were up to. Steve's ever confident voice filled the cramped space. "So... Before we get started, does anyone want to get out?"
"Have fun!" Kasumi giggled with a parting brush of his shoulder, before Steve noticed the tell tale shimmering that was the only thing that gave away the nearly invisible woman.
Her 'cloak' almost seemed like some nifty magic tick to him, but he certainly didn't approve of the way the petite self confessed 'master thief' used it. Since his first few days on the ship, he made a habit of looking over his shoulder everytime he took a shower, nervously glancing around for that now familiar shimmer. Steve was still getting used to the idea he was in the middle of open space on an honest to god space ship. The last thing he needed to worry about was a peeping tom, albeit a good looking one from the little he had seen under her hood. He didn't even want to consider the reason why some of his burrowed underwear had mysteriously vanished for days at a time.
"Wait, what?" Joker's green eyes snapped up from his spot leaning against the back corner of the eternally slow moving elevator. Chakwas had insisted he get some real sleep, in a real bed, and he had grudgingly followed Steve into the elevator. But he was regretting that idea when he noticed the developing situation. He did not like the mischievous look on Shepard's face. "O...kay, whatever the hell is going on, I want out." A determined shared glance between Jacob and Miranda wasn't helping to calm his nerves either.
When Shepard smiled and shook her head, Jeff apparently knew he was totally screwed. "Sorry Joker, you're stuck on this ride. Steve is just going to have to deal with this unexpected problem." An irritated sigh was Joker's only response, as Captain Hopelessly Humble gave the wary pilot his best reassuring nod.
"Well that certainly didn't sound omin-" Joker flinched as Jacob pulled a pistol from his hip in a flash and received an elbow to the face from Steve for his trouble. Seeing the muscular Cerberus agent fly across the elevator and slump against the wall wasn't helping his nerves in the slightest. "Ah...shit! Not another one! Can't you people schedule these things for when I'm not around?!" Shepard just held a finger to her lips and gently pressed Jeff against the wall when the two men almost jostled into him.
Miranda only took a moment to shake her head in disgust at Jacob's incompetence, while a dark blue glow began to envelope her form. But before she could so much as twitch a muscle, the front of her usual catsuit, now distinctly NON Cerberus colors, was stained with red dye from Jacob's stolen sidearm.
"Nice try Ms. Lawson, just a little too slow this time." Steve grinned at the XO's outright glare as he lightly hit the grip of the pistol against the back of Jacob's skull, 'knocking him out' when he tried to get up from the floor to rejoin the fight.
Joker thunked his head on against the back wall as Steve quickly looked the surprised pilot over, making sure the unintended guest to their little training session hadn't gotten himself injured in the scuffle. "Easy Joker, you alright?" Steve only grinned when the pilot offered a gesture he was all too familiar with. It was only the slightest flicker of motion out of the corner of Steve's right eye that caused the splat of red dye to hit the metal wall behind him, instead of striking the side of his head.
Another quiet SPLAT! sound soon followed. "Damn." Shepard wiped at the dye dripping into her hazel eyes as Steve hit her with another 'round' in the chest for good measure. "I really thought that was going to work. Nice shot Steve."
"I recall someone telling me not to trust any potential enemies. I just figured 'observing instructor' should be on that list... ma'am." Steve had to smirk at the annoyed glare Shepard cast his way, knowing full well just how much she disliked 'that word'.
"What a giant bloody waste of time." Miranda huffed, as she crossed her arms and waited for EDI to let them off at the crew deck.
"Come on Miri, the guy's getting quality training this way. You're just pissed that he's such a quick learner. Not so fun being the first one to get taken out is it?" Jacob laughed as the annoyed fellow biotic punched him in the shoulder. "See, sore loser, I knew it!"
"Says the man that was left sprawled out on the deck for most of this exercise." Miranda growled in reply as she glared down at her ruined uniform. As if she were trying to will the damning dye stains away.
"Says the woman who's gut shot because she didn't put up her Barrier fast enough." The Normandy XO's soul searing glare was enough to make Steve take a step back from her, and he wasn't even the target.
"Is this a combat ship or space kindergarten? Because some days, I honestly can't tell." Shepard mumbled, having cupped her face in both hands before shaking her head in mock frustration.
Steve was just about to comment on that, a wry grin forming on his lips, when he felt a sudden wetness on the back of his head. Confused, he dabbed at the source and was shocked to see sticky red dye covering his fingers.
"HA! And you said he would never fall for it! Five hundred credits, time to pay up Shepard." The shocked super soldier turned to see Joker grinning from ear to ear as he blew away 'the smoke' from his hidden pistol. The pilot's utter joy was short lived however the instant he saw the betrayed look in Steve's big blue eyes. "Aw, dammit! Don't give me that kicked puppy dog look Rogers... You are totally ruining this for me!" Joker sighed and lowered his head before gesturing to the modded pistol in Steve's hand. "If it will help, you can shoot me in the face. One time offer only."
"Might be a little hard to do that, seeing as I'm dead right now." Steve muttered, more annoyed with himself for falling into such an easy trap than with Joker for playing his part perfectly. "On the other hand..." Steve's eyes flicked up with a playful grin.
"Wait, don't even think about-GAH!" Jeff's yelp resounded in the cramped elevator as red dye splattered against his SR-2 cap. "Dammit."
"Well I'm starving. Who's hungry?" Shepard loudly asked as they stepped out of the elevator. It was a clear effort on her part to try and get Miranda out of her self imposed funk, not to mention her grieving pilot who was busy frantically trying to wipe the stain from his cap.
"Being just as dead as the good Captain, I don't have much of an appetite at the moment Shepard." Miranda growled with a subtle pout.
"Ah come on XO, there's no need to be a sore loser. Tell you what, how about I let you win next round. Sound good?" Steve offered the raven haired woman a beaming smile, only to take a few steps back when her botics flared to life.
Her tone was icily calm when she replied. "Don't coddle me Captain Rogers. I always win in the end. And if I ever suspect that you let me win, you will regret it."
Nodding, Steve glanced over his shoulder and snatched a snack bar from a small pile on one of the mess tables, placatingly offering it to the irritated woman. "Okay then. Peanut butter and chocolate. Women still love chocolate right?"
Lawson sighed before roughly snatching it from Steve's open palm. "You're lucky you're such a gentleman. Don't see many of those anymore."
"Chocolate hmm? I have a different desert in mind..." An all too familiar voice whispered directly behind the groaning captain.
Steve jumped as he felt Kasumi brush against him for at least the third time that day. "Almost miss the days when women weren't allowed near a war zone, let alone a warship." Sighing at the multiple grins around him, and a mildly disgusted but mostly amused glare from Miranda, Steve lowered his head in exasperation. "I don't suppose it would help if I said I'm not interested. Not that you aren't a very pretty lady and all." Steve quickly amended.
"Aww, he's blushing. Again." The thief took pity on him though, as she gently patted Steve's arm. "It's alright, I can take a hint Rogers. Still, you can't blame a girl for dreaming." Kasumi whispered once more into his ear before appearing a few seconds later, sitting on a nearby table.
"Might wanna have Doctor Chakwas take a look at that." Jacob snarked, wincing as Miranda elbowed him in the ribs.
"Man, it must really suck to be you Rogers'. She likes you. I mean a lot. Check your pockets." Joker scoffed at a surprised Steve, who reached into his pockets to find his missing credit chit, along with a pair of lacy pink underwear.
"Oops." The panties gracefully snatched from his hand before the still beet red captain could blink. "Chambers is probably going to want this back." With a casual salute Kasumi once again flickered out of site.
"Musta been good if she gave you your credits back Rogers." A snickering Jeff muttered as he slowly limped to the crew quarters, giving the thoroughly embarrassed man an annoyed look as he 'got the door' for him. "Thanks. You're totally gonna to put EDI out of a job at this rate."
"And Shepard wants to take this walking 'boyscout' into the field?" Miranda quietly muttered under her breath, glaring at Jacob as he frowned down at her and shook his head.
"I can assure you Joker, Captain Rogers' compassionate nature will not 'put me out of a job'."
"Thanks EDI. You're a real class act." Steve offered as he glanced towards the ceiling before one of EDI's small holographic terminals activated, which Steve gave a friendly wave. "Oh, there ya are."
"I am everywhere. It is a pleasure having you inside me Captain Rogers." At the awkward silence that fell over the crew deck, Steve noticed that everyone around him seemed to be waited for the other shoe to drop. "That was a joke."
"Awkward." Joker sing songed just as the crew quarters hatch shut in front of him. "Hey! Real funny EDI, open the door."
"I'm sorry Jeff, I'm afraid I can't do that."
"Great. You've been raiding my old sci-fi vid collection again haven't you?" Jeff asked, already nervous enough at being onboard a ship controlled by an artificial intelligence without her making more bad jokes.
"That was you actually, you suckered us into watching that movie where the ah..." Steve stopped short as he considered ripping the nearest vent cover off its hinges, on the off chance that EDI was fixing to become the next HAL 9000. "And for the record, that unblinking red eye camera really gave me the creeps."
EDI's hologram momentarily flickered from blue to red causing Steve to jump back for the second time that hour. "I take it you prefer my default user interface over any future customizations?"
"Yes!" Steve and Joker shouted at the same time as Miranda and Jacob nearly broke into an honest-to-god fit of laughter.
"You look good in blue." Nice, relaxing non homicidal robot blue. Steve mentally added.
"Thank you for your insightful input." With that, the door opened with a near silent hiss, much to their immense relief.
"Wait a minute..." Jeff glared at the innocuous looking ball of blue light gazing at them. "Your screwing with me again aren't you? Not cool EDI."
Steve lightly punched the pilot in the arm, just hard enough to make Jeff wince as he casually leaned closer to whisper in his ear. "Don't make her angry. Are you sure she isn't a female version of ... you know who?"
Shepard rolled her eyes at the super soldier's less than super deceptive skills. "Last time I checked. The voice sort of gives that away." She said as she stared at them both from the open door to the crew quarters.
"I would like to assure both of you, I have no desire to harm anyone onboard." EDI calmly reassured the less than convinced pair.
"Aww! Don't be so quick to give up a good thing EDI." Kasumi didn't even pause as Steve frowned at her while Jeff offered her the mother of all death glares. "Just imagine what having dozens of organic slaves to do your every bidding would be like."
"Exceedingly tedious and a waste of my processing power giving that I am capable of performing many tasks at a far greater speed." EDI waited a beat, an almost wry tone in her voice as her avatar turned to the men. "Please do not take offense. That was not meant as an insult, merely a statement of fact."
"She's got you there. If you two are done, we're arriving at our destination in a few hours. I suggest you get some chow and get suited up, we leave as soon as we dock. And Joker, get some rest. Don't make me make that an order."
Steve glanced at around him before giving Shepard a slightly nervous stare. "Um...you meant them right?" Rogers pointed to Miranda and Jacob, the fellow biotic grabbing an energy bar or five for himself as the both sat at the nearby table.
"You're coming along too." Before Steve could protest, Shepard reached out and gripped his shoulder. "I know you're new to all this, but you can't stay cooped up in this ship forever Rogers. Best way I figure for you to get used to the present is to jump right in."
Roger's nodded in understanding, since he had started to feel like a bit of a fifth wheel around the constantly active ship as it was. "Sink or swim huh? I won't let you down Commander."
"You're the best damn soldier in history, I'd expect nothing less." She shot back with a reassuring grin. "That said, you're a couple hundred years behind the times, so I'll give you a few minutes to get the basics down."
Steve could help but smile at the mischievous glint in her hazel eyes. "Actually, EDI's been pretty helpful since I got brave enough to start asking her about stuff. Also, Mr. Vakarian and Mr. Massani were kind enough to give me some pointers on the shooting range." Oddly enough, Steve had found getting slapped in the back of the head and being called a 'Guddamn moron' anytime he had made a mistake oddly refreshing after the non stop curiosity and hero worship since he had 'woken up'.
"Indeed. Captain Rogers is easily the most studious member of the crew, Commander. First reviewing basic Earth history from the mid 1940s, up to the discovery of the prothean archives on Mars in 2148. He then changed his field of study to general galactic history, with a particular emphasis on human interaction various other species. However, I feel I must note that his fascination with modern weapons and armor technology, as well as modern battlefield tactics, is borderline obsessive." EDI kindly pointed out, much to the super soldier's silent embarrassment.
"Know thy enemy, right Rogers?" Shepard asked, and wasn't disappointed when Rogers nodded his head. "This is a warship EDI, it makes sense to me that he'd want to brush up on how we handle things." A slight frown formed on her lips as Shepard continued, knowing exactly what Rogers would have found in the historical archives. "As for his study of our less than stellar track record with our neighbors, well, I can't blame him for that either given where we found him."
Noticing a slightly distant look on her face Steve suddenly felt compelled to defend humanity's interaction with the galaxy as a whole. "Well, over all, I'd say humanity has done pretty well for itself ma'am."
"Spit it out Rogers. By the way, never play poker with me. Actually, scratch that, don't play poker on this ship period." Shepard was never one to interfere with her crew having a bit of fun, but she certainly didn't want all of the as yet unused credits she had allocated for him simply doled out to the rest of his new crewmates. Steve's 'poker face' was about as impressive as his inability to lie convincingly in general.
"Well, it just seems to me that people haven't..." Steve paused as Shepard gestured for him to continue. "I just thought things might have changed more is all, with people I mean. Everyone still seems just as arrogant, ruthless and selfish as when I...fell asleep." He finally said, and hoped he hadn't just pissed off every human aboard the vessel with his comment.
Shepard kept her face straight, knowing damn well from the few recovered reports from the crash site that Rogers sure as hell hadn't just peacefully drifted off to sleep in that bomber. He was lucky to be alive, thrown clear of the pilot's seat only to freeze to 'death' a few meters away. "Speak freely Rogers, even though you do know you're technically free to do so whenever you want right?" Shepard asked, knowing the man wouldn't truly speak his mind unless she said it anyway.
"Shepard, I woke up in a Cerberus ship where innocent people were being tortured. Then I find several articles when I was looking over your history, which detailed terrorist bombings around communities full of….different races. There were also various mentions of raids, slavery, kidnappings, and murder. Some of it done by humans against other humans." He held up a hand before Shepard could say anything. "I watched the attack on Mindoir, the Blitz on Elysium, the siege on Torfan, and the First Contact War. The last one was caused by clear misunderstandings on both sides leading to the conflict, so I know we aren't the only ones with problems. Even so, it's still pretty disheartening to know we haven't changed much over the last two centuries."
Shepard had to nod her head with some reluctance since she didn't disagree on any particular point. Hell, she had been on Elysium after all. "Sorry Captain, I can understand how our distant little future might be a bit bleaker than you expected."
Miranda scoffed as she chewed on her power bar. "What did you expect Rogers? The entire galaxy living in perfect harmony or some other pacifistic nonsense?"
Jacob sighed and un warped his second bar. "Hey, give the guy a break Miranda. There's nothing wrong with wanting the world to be a better place than it is."
"Idealistic flights of fancy will get you nowhere." Miranda shot back without a second thought.
To her surprise, Steve crossed his arms and nodded his head in agreement to the genetically engineered woman. "You're right, but a guy can still hope that the things we do today will lead to a better tomorrow. Right? Otherwise why are any of you even aboard this ship?"
Miranda was just about to reply when she snapped her mouth shut, being in the exceedingly rare situation of not having a quick logical counter argument.
"Well shit! Will you look at that, the Cerberus bitch is speechless. Not bad for an old as dirt thawed out corpsicle." Jack's grin could have split her bald head in half as all eyes turned to see her leaning against the mess hall wall, her arms crossed under her chest. "How does it feel to be outsmarted by the fuckin' Boyscout, Princess?"
"If I wanted an opinion on the latest drug craze, or career advice in hijacking or prostitution I'd ask for your sage wisedom. That's about all you're good for anyway." Miranda casually replied, staring at the unstable biotic as she would a defective experiment.
"Say that again you Cerberus bitch." Jack growled menacingly as she started forward.
"Ladies." Steve began, but was casually pushed aside by Jack as she charged towards the table, glowing bright blue and getting brighter with every step.
"Go on, give me an excuse to knock those pearly whites right out of your fuckin' skull." Jack slowly licked her lips, smirking at Miranda's look of pure disgust. "I'm sure your old boss won't mind getting a gummer from you when you crawl back to him on your knees bitch."
"Enough!' Steve shouted about the same time Shepard moved to intercept Jack. Jack rounded on him, her fists raised, but she didn't follow through as Steve stared deep into her pain stricken brown eyes. "I don't know the history between you and Cerberus, and I honestly don't care. We're in this together, or we're not. There won't be any middle ground when the enemy comes knocking down our door. And you!" This he directed at Miranda. "The next time you feel the need to bait her, I won't get in her way. I'd rather have someone I can trust at my back than have to defuse a petty argument in the middle of a firefight. One lapse in judgment is all it takes to get someone killed. I thought with all your higher education and supposedly superior genetics you'd know that Ms. Lawson."
"Hell Cheerleader, you got Mr. White Knight riding to your rescue. I bet after the mission you'd let him bend you over that big desk and pull the giant stick out of your ass before he fucks you with it."
"Funny, I was thinking the same thing, except with me, he wouldn't catch a nasty case of varren scale itch." That had to be the worst thing Miranda could have said as Jack's face went from sarcastic cheer to shocked indignation, to murderous rage after a tense few seconds of silence.
The only thing that stopped the two biotics from tearing each other apart was Steve instinctively pinning the former prisoner's arms behind her back while giving the ship's XO a dark glare. "I think you've said enough." Steve bit out to the raven haired woman before she could retort, as he bodily dragged a kicking, screaming, and cursing Jack out of the mess hall. The only thing that saved him from being smeared across the ship's bulkheads was his vastly superior strength as she rounded on him next, her biotics at full power with the advent of her all consuming rage now focused on him alone in the confined elevator.
"Miranda. You and me, your quarters. Now." Shepard's terse order was the last thing Steve heard from the crew deck as the the lift closed.
Jack's enraged glare seared into Roger's soul as she gestured at the small compartment around them. "You're a fuckin' idiot! You know that right?! I'm going to smear the goddamn walls with you!" Seething, Jack began to pace back and forth on her side of the lift like a trapped animal, never taking her eyes off Steve, who casually leaned against the far wall.
"Then why haven't you?" He asked, looking far calmer than he actually felt as he met her infuriated gaze. "I've seen what biotics can do, thanks to EDI's information archives. You could easily overpower most people, I hear you even tore a YMIR mech in half. Whatever that is. And yet you haven't touched me."
"You're a pussy, you wouldn't be worth the trouble Boyscout." Jack coldly growled as her biotics spontaneously flared again. "'Sides, I still haven't decided if I want to rip your clothes off or splatter your guts all over this slow ass lift. Whaddaya say? Tell me you at least know where to put it Stripes."
Steve sighed and rested his head against the wall. "I know how it works Jack. Just never found the right dance partner was all." He wasn't about to mention Peggy to her.
"Dancing?" Jack's biotics snuffed out as she held up her arms in exasperation. "I'm talkin' about fucking Rogers, the only dancing I like is rutting around like a couple of horney as hell animals."
"I was just trying to be civil about it. But again, yes I know how it works." Steve answered with a shrug of his shoulders. "And the answer is no. Don't take it personally, you're actually very-"
"What? Trashy? Unfuckable?" Jack spat out, a flicker of disappointment replacing her lustful stare.
"I was going to say pretty, in your own unique way. It's just that..." Steve chose his next words carefully. "I'd never take advantage of woman like that, especially when she's upset."
Once again, Jack was dumbfounded for all of three seconds before she closed the short distance between them, her once again glowing blue hands inches from his throat. "I'm not fucking upset blondie! And I sure as shit ain't pretty! You need your goddamn eyes checked." She wasn't about to admit it to him, but his calm veneer was getting under her skin. She didn't know how to react since she was used to all manner of bastards, sadists, rapists, and thugs, but not some regular idiot being nice to her.
"My eyes are fine, better than fine actually. And you're right, you clearly aren't emotional at all." Rogers offered with a quirked eyebrow as he glanced down at her clenched glowing fists. "Still think you're kinda pretty though. Maybe even...cute. In a weird brave, stubborn sorta way."
"You are such an asshole Rogers! Why can't you just be like that Cerberus bitch?! I can handle her, not this….this….UGH!" Jack spun and slammed her biotically assisted fist into the grey wall next to them leaving a noticeable dent.
Steve eyed the damaged before giving the glowing ex convict a knowing look. "You're so used to people only looking out for themselves all the time, the one time someone's halfway decent to you, it totally throws you off..."
"Fuck yes!" Jack shouted out before she could clamp her mouth shut.
Steve leaned towards the petite young woman with a satisfied grin. "See, was that so hard to admit?"
"Fuck off boy scout." Was Jack's sharp retort, but it didn't have the same bite to it that it might have under different circumstances. "You're almost as annoying as Shepard."
"Yeah well, guess I'm in good company then. Far as I can tell, she's a fine officer. Reminds me a little of someone I used to know."
"Your best bud Bucky or some shit?" At Steve's questioning look, Jack immediately spun on her heel. "You talk in your sleep blondie….or so I hear. Your invisible stalker likes to spy on people." Jack snapped her fingers as a devilish grin spread across her face. "Oh...I know. It's your old squeeze huh? Pepper, Penny? Oh right, Peggy! Certainly stare at that piece of shit compass often enough Hero."
Steve's blue eyes narrowed at the sound of Peggy's name, about the same time his jaw clenched in restrained anger. "Don't. Just don't."
"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I finally find a chink in that six pack armor of yours Stevie?" From the massive grin on her face Steve knew she wasn't sorry in the slightest.
Rogers paused to take a breath before counting to ten in his head. "You know what? I can see why nobody on this ship likes you Jack. Too bad I don't give up so easily." Seeing his confident smirk, Jack scowled at the two hundred and sixty-seven year old. Technically speaking.
To his surprise, when the elevator opened on Engineering deck, Jack paused and looked over her shoulder at Steve. The look on her face was hard to read, but he was sure she looked almost apologetic. "Thanks….for getting me away from that Cerberus bitch. I'd hate to have to clean her guts off my boots."
"Anytime." While Steve had a feeling there was a lot more to Jack than met the eye, he wasn't brave or stupid enough to try and find out why she had gone into a murderous rage. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Engineer Daniels wouldn't want blood on her boots either."
"Gabby? She's not bad, for a damn grease monkey. Let me borrow 'em. Ask her if ya like Stripes." With that, Jack hopped over the stairwell railing, disappearing into the dark underbelly of the ship, leaving him to shake his head at her...unique vocabulary, among other things.
"I trust you Jack." Steve muttered to himself, quietly adding with a shake of his head, "I have no idea why, but I do." He had had time to listen to some of the rumors that circulated around the Normandy's halls. He knew Jack was a convicted criminal, many times over in fact, but he had also had time to talk to Shepard. She had told him more than just rumors, and had also asked him not to do anything stupid around the emotionally damaged 'Psychotic Biotic' as Joker called Jack, never to her face though.
Taking in the humming corridor, Steve looked to the right and glanced through the cargo bay window overlooking the hangar bay. Probably not a good idea to bother Zaeed when he's cleaning Jessie... Despite the fact Massani was a mercenary, he had a way about him that had endeared Steve to the grizzled veteran. He kinda reminded him of Colonel Phillips, the way he scowled and growled at anyone not worth his time. The big difference was that yes, Zaeed worked for money, but he didn't take jobs that were questionable, unlike most mercenaries he had heard about during the war. Once you had Zaeed's respect though, he turned out to be an interesting guy, full of wise advice and stories of past deeds, even though most of his stories involved him being the only survivor of the missions he had been a part of.
Steve only had to spin around at the sound of something heavy smashing into the opposite observation window to know Grunt, an honest-to-god alien teenager grown in a tank filled with liquid all things, was not in a good mood today. The kid, Steve noticed he was the only crew member apparently brave enough to call Grunt that, must have been going through a rough time. He could certainly sympathize. Waking up with nothing in your head but whatever a weird machine had taught you had to be at least as traumatic as Steve's less than stellar arrival into this brave new world.
A few confident strides had Rogers knocking on the krogan's hatch. "Hey, Grunt? Anybody home?"
The hatch opened to reveal a puzzled looking Grunt staring down at his unwanted guest. "You got a death wish or something human? I'm busy doing...stuff. Go away."
"Well hello to you too. I was wondering if you wanted to get a quick sparring session in?" Steve's bright blue eyes flicked towards the damaged window before returning to their unwavering gaze. "Maybe try to hit something that can hit back?"
"Spar? With you? Heh heh heh. I'd break you in half like a varren pup." Grunt smashed his meaty fists together with a loud THUNK. "Why not? Wait..." Grunt managed to look thoughtful, even mildly concerned for a moment. "Did you ask my Battlemaster if I could break you? She doesn't like it when I smash things without asking first."
Steve shrugged, offering the massive krogan a wry grin. "Nope, why would I? Just two guys going a few rounds. It's not like you need the Commander's permission to do that right?"
"You really have a lot to learn about krogans, human. But I like you." Grunt grinned in challenge as he started to glow a dark blue. "Just don't go whining to Shepard when I kick your ass through the hull."
"No worries, I'm not a weasel Grunt. Cross my heart and hope to die." Steve stated as he crossed his chest.
"Huh? You look more like a primate to me. And you don't have to hope to die. That's happening either way." Without a moment's hesitation, Grunt charged forward with a deafening roar. Steve had all of two seconds to jump to the side as the krogan youth slammed into the wall, leaving a good sized dent where his head hit. Barely stunned, Grunt spun to the right, his arm swinging out wide, forcing the super soldier to a knee before he came back up like a spring, slamming his fist into the alien's chin. That slowed the krogan down as he stumbled back, as if he had been hit by a tank. "I take it back human, you're not so squishy after all." Grunt said after shaking the stars from his vision.
"Thanks. You're quicker than you look." Steve shot back as he avoided shaking his throbbing fist. "And I was thinking we do this like gentlemen, down on the hangar deck with a mat. Not like a couple of bare knuckle brawlers in a bar."
"Oh. Krogans aren't so picky when it comes to fighting. Besides, what's the fun if you don't leave with a few broken bones?"
"Not having to explain to Doctor Chakwas how you got them?"
"Hmm. Good point human." Grunt leaned conspiratorially closer to Steve, hunching over to quietly whisper. "Don't tell anyone, but that old human female scares me. I don't like doctors."
"Some things don't change big guy. Trust me, docs were scary back in my time too." Steve chuckled while Grunt grinned, apparently glad they had something in common. "Don't worry, your secret's safe with me. And don't tell anyone, but me and needles...we don't get along." Steve gave Grunt his best mock shudder as the krogan rapidly nodded in agreement.
"They can disembowel me and I won't say anything. Shepard though...you better hope she doesn't ask." Grunt offered as he tried his best to copy Steve's earlier gesture.
"Can't blame ya big guy. I wouldn't want the Commander on my bad side either. That's just plain suicide far as I can tell." After they had stopped on the Citadel to drop off their civilian passengers, another modern marvel the likes of which he was slowly starting to get used to, Steve had gotten curious about his benefactor. Looking up Commander Shepard's service record had been….quite enlightening, to say the least. Few soldiers had seen as many engagements with enemy forces and come out the other end relatively unscathed. Well, except for him perhaps, but like her, he didn't like to brag about his accomplishments.
"Huh. You're not as stupid as I thought human." Grunt muttered, rubbing at his chin.
"Thank you Grunt." Steve replied with a nod of his head, grinning up at the massive armored teenager. "So, we taking this down stairs, or you want to get some chow in the mess?"
"Hmm. I would like to make you bleed, but I'm starving. Let's eat. We can do the bleeding thing later."
"You got it." Steve walked over to the lift with a smirk and tapped at the door control only to have exactly nothing happen.
EDI's holographic icon helpful popped up a second later. "Hello Captain Rogers, hello Grunt. Captain Rogers, Commander Shepard has asked me to sternly remind you that you have yet to report to medbay to receive your haptic implants. Please do so in a timely fashion before the upcoming mission or, and I am quoting the Commander, she will be forced to drag you kicking and screaming to the medbay if Doctor Chakwas does not do so first."
"Well, it was nice knowing you human." Grunt laughed and slapped Steve on the back before activating the elevator for them.
"Yeah..." Steve rubbed at the back of his neck where Chakwas had inserted some type of language translator the day he had come on board. He hadn't set foot in medbay since. Despite her promise to the contrary, it had hurt a lot more than she had led him to believe. Rogers could see why they usually implanted the device at birth, it wasn't exactly a pleasant experience, and he would have wanted to get it over with as soon as possible too given the choice.
Grunt shook his head, crossing his massive arms as he gave Steve a disgusted look as the elevator doors opened to the crew deck. "Blah, don't be a coward Rogers. Just walk right up to Chakwas and say-"
"Hello Grunt, Captain. Say what exactly?" Leaning against the elevator door frame like a medical smock clad tigress in waiting, Karin Chakwas interrupted with a raised eyebrow, her green gaze mischievously flicking between the mismatched pair before landing on Steve. "You know, I do believe you've failed to report to my med bay for the last two days."
"Um...ah..." Grunt looked ready to rip the deck plating out from under his feet if it meant a quick escape from Chakwas' piercing stare.
Steve couldn't blame him, as he quickly remembered one of the brief conversations he had had with Grunt when he tagged along with Shepard to meet the crew on his second day aboard. "Grunt was just telling me how much he appreciates you trying to help him make sense of all those implanted images in his head. He's just too stubborn to say so himself."
"Yeah. That." Chakwas was taken aback at the sight of the blushing krogan as Grunt nervously rubbed at the back of his neck.
"Thank you Grunt, it's my pleasure." Chakwas lightly gripped Steve's arm, tugging him towards the med bay.
Grunt gave Steve a sarcastic salute, bashing his fist against his chest as Rogers was politely dragged away. "Try not to scream so loud this time human! Heh heh heh."
End Notes:
Archer83: I hope you have enjoyed this long overdue update dear readers! Life just tends to get in the way sometimes, despite our best efforts. Review and tell Vergil and I what you thought!