A/N: Okay all I have several chapters in the can so I thought I would give you a bonus. Two chapters in one day. Thanks for the reviews and please keep them coming.

Disclaimer: I don't own Big Bang Theory. I just like to take them out to play once in a while.

The young woman's eyes were closed as she thought back about the previous few hours. Some said it would be all downhill from here, but she preferred to think of it as a reward earned from hard work. Settling in for pleasant dreams, she went over what she considered the ride of her life….

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The night Sheldon left Pasadena, Amy found herself at her lab at Caltech at three o'clock in the morning. Finding out from Leonard and Penny that her boyfriend left Pasadena with their blessing was upsetting enough, but her anger increased exponentially when she realized that while they got to see Sheldon off, he didn't tell her goodbye. She didn't have a destination in mind when she left 4A, but she knew that she didn't want to talk to anyone.

She looked on her phone and saw that there were five missed calls since that last conversation with Penny and Leonard and Sheldon's call from earlier. Penny called about thirty minutes after she beat Leonard with a pillow and stormed out and around midnight. Sheldon had called three more times, the last at 1 AM. Maybe she should have answered the calls, but she didn't want to talk or see anyone, particularly them at that time. Unable to stop herself, she pushed voice mail and listened to the calls.

'Ames, it's Penny. I'm so sorry for not getting to you before he left. I'm….I'm just worried after the way you left here. Please call or text me.'

'Amy, it's Sheldon. I just….I just want to make sure you're okay. I left rather in a hurry after Leonard and Penny found me. I will talk to you soon. It's Sheldon'

'Ames, it's me again. You haven't gotten back to me and it's midnight. You're not at home and you've got me scared. Please call me. Be mad at me tomorrow but I want to know you're all right'

'It's Sheldon again. I didn't catch you earlier and I wanted to let you know I think I'm out of California now. I'm going through the South. I know it's usually past your bedtime and mine, but I can't sleep for some reason. Kolinahr isn't helping either and I don't have any Star Trek to watch since I don't have wireless on the train. Have a good night. It's Sheldon'

'Amy, it's one o'clock in the morning and I can't sleep. I tried singing 'Soft Kitty' but it didn't work. I hope to talk to you soon. I don't know anyone else on the train and some of them are most unpleasant to look at and are just plain dumb. I'm sorry for what I said to you earlier that night about the future. Good night. It's Sheldon'

Tears fell as she deleted Penny's messages. She was usually very efficient at keeping her mailbox cleaned out, but when she got to Sheldon's messages, she couldn't do it. Quickly wiping her tears, she put her phone down and went back to what she was working on.

She examined the tumor smear under the microscope for several minutes, but she realized she was getting nowhere. She got up and went back to her desk, where she re-read the letter she received before leaving work earlier. She meant to talk to him about it, but her intentions were derailed by Sheldon's meltdown. Her phone buzzed and she saw it was a message from Penny.

Ames outside lab. need 2 talk. Plz let in.

She briefly considered ignoring the text, but then realized the time and that leaving someone outside alone wasn't a good idea, so she left the lab. She walked around the building until she got to the front door and saw Penny standing out there. Moving quickly, she got to the door and opened it. When Penny walked in, the two took the short walk back to the lab.

"Penny, what are you doing here?"

Penny saw the pain in her friend's eyes and felt worse knowing she was part of the reason it was there. "What am I doing here? What are you doing here? It's the middle of the night"

"I'm aware of that"

"Sweetie I've tried calling you. I was worried sick after you left"

"I am aware of that also. I'm sorry you were worried, but I just didn't feel like talking to you at this time. I still don't."

Penny felt the sting of Amy's words. "Ames, I'm so sorry. He didn't say anything to us, either. The fact that we found him was luck because of his phone. Please forgive us"

The two walked into Amy's lab. Amy knew her friend didn't mean to hurt her, but her emotions were still fresh. "Maybe later, Penny, but not now"

Penny took comfort hearing that and she realized her first question was not answered. "Sweetie, you have most of your notes at home. Why did you really come here?"

Amy looked at the woman she considered her bestie and felt more pain. "I needed to think without distraction"

Penny felt a sense of dread. "About what, Honey?"

Amy pulled the letter from her desk and showed Penny what she was reading. She watched as her friend's eyes grew wide.

"You're going to Michigan? Permanently? Does Sheldon know?"

"It's a thought and no he doesn't, not yet. He called three times, but I just wasn't up to hearing from him again after his perfunctory phone call."

Penny just sat down on a stool. "I'm so sorry that we didn't call you, but please don't leave us"

"As tempting as it may be at this time, it's not permanent. Central Michigan University asked me to be a guest lecturer for the summer semester. A friend of mine from school teaches in the Neuroscience program but his wife is sick so he is taking a sabbatical and recommended me for the position since my study is completed here"

"Amy….."

"It's a smaller university than I am used to, but any opportunity to encourage students, particularly women into this field is a must. It's an excellent program. Michigan is supposed to be nice during the summer….."

"It's hot as hell, Amy. My family took a vacation there to Mackinac Island one July and we almost baked to death. My parents figured it was colder since it was north of Nebraska. We were wrong. The winters suck too"

"I'm sure it will be hot in California, too and I don't plan on spending a winter there. I need some time away from here, Penny" Amy considered her words before speaking. "Sheldon has been part of my life for four years now. They have been the greatest and the worst. I've given him so much of me, but I have to also think about myself for a change"

Amy wiped a solitary tear away. "He's trying, Penny, I know, but I'm almost 32 years old. I want a committed relationship, a full one. For years I closed myself for fear of getting hurt after all I went through growing up, but Sheldon Cooper snuck in when I was least expecting it, as did my friendships with you and everyone else. After the experiences I have had from meeting him, I realize that I would like a husband…..a family. I want that with him. I don't want to be alone again, but I can't give anymore without something in return. I can't keep taking the occasional crumb he gives me, so I hope he finds what he is looking for, but I am not going to put my life on hold either."

She inhaled then continued. "I am also debating how beneficial you are to me. You're my bestie, but sometimes I wonder if your loyalty is only to Sheldon or if you even take my feelings in consideration"

Penny listened to her friend and realized with a sick feeling to her stomach that she was right. Amy was the one doing most of the giving in her relationship with Sheldon. He had grown during his time with Amy, but after listening to the neuroscientist pour her heart out, to say that she was emotionally exhausted was being kind. She realized that while usually sticking up for Amy, sometimes she wasn't always the best friend to her with her pushing Sheldon instead of considering her feelings more. While the other woman occasionally creeped her out still, Amy always had her back, so she was going to do the same.

"You're right, Amy…absolutely right. I honestly feel that you and Sheldon are endgame, but I might have sometimes put my wishes ahead of your feelings. For that, I'm so sorry. Maybe being apart for a while would be good for you both"

Amy relaxed visibly when she heard Penny giving her support. Maybe that forgiveness will be there sooner than expected. "Penny, I'm still angry with you for tonight, but your intentions were good, they usually are. We'll be okay, but you need to give me some space"

She saw the visible relief on the blonde's face and knew she made the right decision.

"Can I hug you, Ames?" When the scientist nodded, Penny grabbed her and hugged, realizing for the first time how much Amy meant to her as a friend and how much she feared her not forgiving her. After a moment, she let go. "I have one question"

"Of course"

"Can Bernie, Emily, and I visit you sometime this summer? Maybe we can road trip to Mackinac Island? It may not hot as hell."

Amy laughed for the first time tonight. "Of course. You're my bestie"

One week later, Amy arrived at the train station in Ann Arbor, Michigan. She knew it was more practical to fly, but before she could stop herself, she booked a train trip with a stop in Galveston, Texas. She knew the reason why was to see if she could get a glimpse of him in spite of herself.

She was excited at the opportunity that lies ahead of her. The program where Steve taught was a burgeoning one and the fact that he asked her to assist him at his time of need was flattering. It was also a good way for her to keep busy while she debated on her relationship with Sheldon.

"Amy!"

She turned and saw her old friend. They reached each other and hugged. "Amy, thank you so much for helping me this summer"

"Anything for you. How's your wife?"

"As well as can be expected. The chemo is taking a lot out of her. Her sister is staying with her tonight while I get you up to CMU and help you get settled."

"So where is Mount Pleasant from here?"

"About two hours north. I'm leaving you my wife's car so you can get around. My brother is meeting us there later tonight so I can get back"

"I can rent a car, Steve"

"No, I insist. We're not going to need it for a while anyway. Besides anything I can do to make your life easier while you are here. I know you have a lot going on right now"

Sheldon popped back in her head. Not wanting to burden her friend any further, she pushed her sadness down. "Okay, but only if you let me buy you dinner"

"Fair enough"

The two scientists got in the car and drove onto US-23. Almost two hours later, they arrived in town. They drove to a beautiful neighborhood near the campus and arrived at the house. After getting settled in, the two went to a nearby Bennigan's for dinner. Drinks and appetizers were spent playing catch up. Dinner conversation was about his wife, who Amy found out was battling breast cancer. It was near the end that the subject changed.

"Amy, I get the feeling you are not just here to help me out. Does this involve your boyfriend the physicist?"

Amy hesitated for a moment while she debated on what to talk about. "We're moving at two different speeds in our relationship. He's working hard to overcome his issues, but I don't know how much longer I can be patient. He's been through a lot of changes recently and that is something that he doesn't do well." Realizing she had said more than intended, she decided that she needed to be alone. "I'm getting tired, Steven. Can we check out where my office will be? I forgot about the time difference here"

He knew when a subject was closed. "Sure"

Her first two weeks were busy as she got herself adjusted to the time change, immersed in the program offered, and got herself situated on campus. After coming up with an office schedule for the students, she scheduled her twice weekly lectures and finally got herself into a pattern.

One night, Amy was on her laptop surfing the net when she realized that she kept going back to journals featuring physics. "Ugh!" She muttered to herself. "I took a break from writing my next lecture to get Sheldon off my mind and what do I do? Stalk Sheldon websites. I'm so pathetic"

Amy sat back on the couch feeling defeated. She was trying to examine her relationship with Sheldon in a clinical manner, but it was difficult as she kept going back to her heart. She had it locked away for so many years to protect herself from disappointment and rejection. Now, she was screwed.

She thought of all those years growing up when she was taunted for being smart, for being a dork. Being called Gorilla Fingers after the prank with the hand lotion. Her crush asking her to Prom only to stand her up. Opening herself up only brought her pain.

When she met Sheldon Cooper she was excited because he felt the same way about relationships and friendship. They had an association of the mind that she found very stimulating. When they broke up three years ago, it hurt more than she wanted to let on, but hearing about Sheldon and his clowder of cats melted the ice around her heart a little more.

Thanks to Sheldon and his friends, she also met Penny and Bernadette. She remembered how she was about Penny in the beginning and felt very guilty, but seeing the beautiful blonde was a reminder of her younger days. Over time, she saw that there was more to the girl in 4B. Bernadette was another science person who also made her feel accepted and made her realize how much she craved emotional attachments.

There were rough patches along the way, like when the ladies went dress shopping one day without her. Making her maid of honor helped bridge the gap that created. Eventually, Penny sat her down when it was the two of them and explained why they did it. She didn't realize how uncomfortable she made her bestie sometimes and hearing the truth hurt. In the end, she realized that Penny and Bernadette wanted to be her friends and showed their feelings by being honest with her. She still spoke things that were not appropriate at times, but over time she got a better understanding of when to keep things to herself. Thanks to these two ladies, she began to relax into the paradigm of friendship. Emily was someone she liked getting to know also and she was glad Rajesh was able to find someone.

Her thoughts drifted back to her boyfriend. Over time, Sheldon began to relax a little at a time, but every time she thought he would give himself to her, he always retreated into rationalism. When he kissed her on Valentine's Day, something shifted. It was in the heat of the moment and it shocked the hell out of her. However, she wasn't that much off as she didn't miss how he moved in for the kiss, how he touched her waist, and gently brought both of them into the kiss. She remembered how the calm blue of his eyes turned into a storm of darkness and his pupils dilated. When he asked her to accompany him to the conductor, she was so excited because he never asked her to be that involved in a love of his. The closest before was going with him to the comic book store, but she was merely his guest.

She had to give him credit as she noted over those last few weeks how his kisses after date night would last longer, how he always tried to make more time to have lunch with her in her lab as opposed to the cafeteria with his friends, and how he would hold her hand more without looking like he was about to jump out of his skin.

She knew she hurt him when he found out she lied about being sick that Thursday. He hid his sadness, but she saw it in his eyes, but she just needed a break for a while from his misery about string theory. She also noted that he seemed to distance himself a bit after he went out with Penny that night. After Penny told her what the psychic said, it was just only one more chink in their relationship.

It took Sheldon openly mocking her dreams of a family and marriage to finally break her. When he left an apology for what he said after he left, she let loose in an email as she was not up to seeing him at that time. Years of frustration flowed as she purged herself to her boyfriend. She emailed him to let him know she arrived in Michigan and would give him updates on her classes and activities while at CMU, but that was it.

Next week there was two weeks in between the summer sessions at the university and she realized what she needed. Getting her phone, she sent a text to Penny, Bernadette, and Emily.

She needed her friends.