6
The following morning Sheldon got up early and rode the bus to CalTech. He needed to make some arrangements for his formal return to work. He was in his office making notes on his whiteboard he heard a knock at his door. When he opened it he found his boss, Dr. Gabelhauser. He invited him in.
"Good morning, Dr. Gabelhauser."
"Good morning, Dr. Cooper. I heard you were in the building and I wanted to welcome you back."
"Thank you. I am satisfied to return to work. In fact, I intended to come by your office later to go over a few things."
"I have some questions for you too. Would now be a good time for us to speak?"
"Certainly. May I begin?"
"Fine."
"I realize that there has been some concern about my disappointing progress on String Theory."
"Dr. Cooper, I believe the disappointment is primarily yours. The university is quite satisfied with you progress. Honestly, we only expect progress towards a proof from you. It may be many years before an absolute proof is found."
"Dr. Gabelhauser, I've always considered finding that proof to be my mission. To realize that I may never see it is profoundly disappointing."
"Be that as it may, we would be more than happy to see you continue your work with us."
"And I intend to do so with the same diligence as I always have. However, continuing to work towards an answer I may never know puts me in a difficult position. I believe that I am capable of great discoveries and do not wish to only devote myself to something wherein the most I can hope for is the discovery of minor clues."
"What do you propose?"
"I wish to expand my areas of study until I can find an additional area of concentration that will enable me to make the kind of progress in the field that I think we both believe I am capable."
"I'm not certain that there are enough hours in the day for even you to do that much work, Dr. Cooper."
"That is why I propose to hire my current assistant and soon-to-be-Dr. Alex Jensen to work with me on this."
"I must admit we were having some trouble finding a place for Ms. Jensen. We do very much want her to remain with us. We just currently have no position available."
"You may be aware that I I am the recipient of some additional funding which would allow me to hire Dr. Jensen and replace her as my assistant with someone else to work for us both."
"To be honest, I was wondering what you might do with Mrs. Latham's latest donation. Do you know why she switched her funding to you and away from Dr. Hofstadter?"
"I can't say but I would posit that it may have something to do with Hofstadter's recent betrothal."
"I suspected that could be it. It's one of the problems that can come up when our faculty members satisfy the personal requests of donors. I can't imagine what Mrs. Latham might ask of you."
"Oh she was quite clear. Mrs. Latham requested that I make my funding requests in writing and never speak with her or see her again. I am quite happy to abide by those conditions."
"Well, then I suggest you speak with Ms. Jensen and get her to finish her dissertation as quickly as she can."
"I expect to discuss the matter with her shortly. I believe there are some other matters that need to be discussed, tenure among them."
"Ah, yes. Dr. Cooper, you must be aware that you were the leading candidate to receive tenure before your departure."
"I would concur. However, I would like to temporarily withdraw my candidacy until my work paradigm is more settled."
"Well, thank you for considering that action. I wish it didn't raise more problems than it solves, though."
"How so?"
"Well, Dr. Koothrapali has spent more time recently working for you than doing his own work so he really is not ready. Kripke, well, the prospect of dealing with Dr. Kripke in perpetuity is disturbing on a number of levels. And Dr. Hofstadter…"
"What about Dr. Hofstadter?"
"There has been some scuttlebutt about his having something to do with why your monopole expedition failed. Additionally, Joyce Kim, our former grad student who turned out to be a North Korean spy, began blogging about her exploits on the Internet recently. She said some very disturbing things about Dr. Hofstadter. The government has threatened to revoke his security clearance and conduct a formal investigation. I've had to spend a great deal of time recently with them discussing this. Even the prospect of an investigation is quite worrisome. The board thinks it would be quite inappropriate to reward him with tenure at this time."
"I cannot speak to the veracity of Joyce Kim's blog. However I can understand how the university might have a problem at this point."
"Can I convince you to reconsider your decision? Even with your recent confusion, you are one of the best people in your field. The university would be very happy to grant you tenure, even now."
"I must say I'm surprised."
"Please give it some serious thought. The position would enable you to move into the vacant office suite which would support your staffing expansion."
"That's quite true. It could also help with another matter."
"What would that be?"
"My sister has come to live with me and she has an infant son. I have committed to assist her with her child care which would entail bringing the child to work with me a couple of days a week. I was worried that the daily traffic in my office might make that difficult. Having the suite would ease matters."
"Dr. Cooper, I must say that I never would have considered you as a caregiver. The thought that you voluntarily took on such a responsibility raises your profile in my estimation. It makes me think that I was initially even more correct in offering you tenure."
"Dr. Gabelhauser, one cannot be more correct. You can either be correct or incorrect. But I take your meaning in the spirit it was given. I will render you my decision by the time I leave today. Will that be acceptable?"
"That will be fine. Is there anything else we need to discuss?"
"I don't believe so. I expect to be back full-time on Monday morning."
"Good. Despite our differences we've missed having you around, Dr. Cooper."
"Thank you, Dr. Gabelhauser. Good day."