Foreword- Every chapter I get at least one review/question I'll be answering them in a foreword or a shoutout, and the first goes to MattyTF for reviewing this story first!

Sup everyone, Issy here. Ah thank god, am I glad to be back, I presume it's been a day after posting the first chapter? I actually don't know at the moment since I'm typing this riiiight after last chapter. Hopefully I will be posting much faster -not to mention actually posting- than Techhy was. Little bugger [Dirty prick... But it's true.] Okay, my story. Get out.

Is he gone? Yea? Okay. Also, I'm really busy what with moving and I'm what Marlin would call a delay fish. Anyone get the reference? Okay in all seriousness, as the time of typing, I haven't even really made a title for this but I obviously will by the time I post the first chapter. On a side note, the previously mention person [Me, since he isn't clear] is going to act like a beta reader so... sorry to the 0 of you who offered. Also, I do apologize to all you Kirito fans for my harshness last chapter. I actually admire him; just wish I was in some of his situations. A.K.A this story. I'm going to add him in later, anyway, tell me what you guys think of the story, and constructive criticism is always welcome. Flames will be used to burn haters at the stake.

Disclaimer:

I don't own Sword Art Online. If I did it would be a disaster. [And would probably be hentai] Probably not, just bad. [Sure, Sure. And I'm a voice inside your head. In this fanfic, you kind of don't exist. So you kind of are. And I kind of wouldn't make it like that. [Damn your logic.]

{The True Artist}

Chapter two- Can't spell slaughter without laughter.

When you love something, you don't just love the fun and exciting parts. You also love the boring an uninteresting. If you don't accept that, you're just staring at that something's butt as it walks by. You Perv.

-Whoever the fuck said it first, I'm taking your quote and making it better.

A massive beast had pinned down Asuna. The beast was very similar to that of a boar, only twice the height of me or Asuna, and had eight tusks. Not to mention its razor sharp teeth obviously meant for a carnivore. I, without hesitation, leapt up and instinctively drew my weapons. I then proceeded to charge at it, shouting with as much strength as I was feeling, "GET OFF OF HER YOU FUCKING BEAST! I'LL KILL YOU!"

I raised my two maces over my head, and with impossibly vast speed, I hammered and rained blows upon the skull of the vile beast, as it continued to squeal and scream. I then landed a final kicked to its head, and proceeded to launch myself off and land on the ground 10 meters away. I activated my most powerful sword skills, and held my maces together. I felt the system launch me into the air, and I spun around and cut through the air, creating a viable vacuum of drag resistance and air pressure, and all in the space of two seconds, I spun clean through its body. Unfortunately, said air pressure cut off when I made contact, and as I pierced the other side, I was effectively stuck in the boar.

Not even like, caught in its entrails. I was skewered through the boar, my feet handing out one side, and my arms, head, and maces on the other. I heard another scream, and I quickly spun my head around to see Asuna running over to me from her place on the ground. While this small fight with the boar occurred, she was paralyzed with fear, until now. She let out a sob of relief once she saw I was okay. With the exception of the 800-pound boar suit I was wearing. It felt like it was going to crush me. I quickly shoved myself out by pushing my arms and hands against its hide and twisting so I would slide out of the veritable tunnel through its fleshy carcass. Once I got out, I noticed my sternum (the place above your stomach) and down was soaked with pig blood. Thankfully SAO had some measures against that, and as the boar shattered, the blood faded. As soon as it did, Asuna reached me and glomped me. I mean, I've heard it said before that "Nothing says caring like broken bones" but… Jesus Christ [How horrifying!]. I saw her eyes closed, and her hair waving again as she sobbed in relief and smiled at me, knowing I wasn't dying. This was in all truthfulness, the closest I've been with a girl not related to me (Poor Hairukio…).

"And a very beautiful one at that…" I accidentally said out loud. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

"…I'm not that pretty…," she said looking down once she had landed from her leap onto my now presumable cracked spine. (I find myself funny.)

I gasped as I quickly looked over her and replied, (maybe not too great in hindsight, but this was the present. At that point.)"Asuna… You're very pretty. I meant what I said back there."

Unfortunately, that did not appear to be the *best* response, and I felt my face hit the ground with an aggravated Asuna standing over me. I felt the swelling on my head, I heard her say one thing-

"Dummy."

Later that day, we were heading back to the town to sell the weak items and buy various things, such as potions or crystals. Being in beta, though, none of the NPC shopkeepers were very advanced, and you had to say JUST the right words for them to interact with you. After spending hours hunting, I had enough money to buy the best equipment on the market. Granted, I had one thing going for me besides that. When I killed the mid-level boss, it dropped a rare item. Naturally one thinks that they only came from true bosses, but there is a 1/1368 chance that a mid-level drops the same as the boss for that level. Exiting the shop, I walked over to Asuna, and tapped her on the shoulder as she was looking for me. Unfortunately, like usual apparently, she whirled around and punched me in the face. Once she saw it was me and not some perv [I KNOW YOURE TALKING ABOUT ME] (YEP!), she immediately helped me up and apologized.

"I'm so sorry; I didn't recognize you with that cloak. Forgive me?"

"Sure, I'd forgive you if you gave me a hug," I said chuckling at my joke. I had unknowingly just opened up an opportunity for her to hit me. I quickly realized my mistake, and braced for it. Instead, I felt her arms wrap around me while she laid her head on my chest, looking away. Judging by how she was doing so, I assumed she was blushing again. I smirked at this but chose wisely not to say anything this time.

"I hate you sometimes," I heard her quietly mutter as she looked away, but I could tell she obviously liked being this close. I had some idea that she might have liked me, there's no way I'm as oblivious as that Kirito, who was apparently some dumb boy my age who allegedly was going to "save the players of Sword Art Online" and had a veritable harem of girls after him. I actually learned quite a bit about him, and he is oblivious as fuck. He only knew one of them liked him, and that was when she told him. After all, HE told me about Kirito, and the old fabled prophecy that came with Sword Art Online.

"I know, but we're still friends, right?"

I heard her voice and breathing hitch for a second as she replied, stuttering, "U-uh yea, f-friends…" Yep. I knew it. But we had just met, so I wasn't even going to think about that kind of relation with anyone I met. Luckily, SAO had a sort of 50- year- old- pedophile protection, where you can only play as your true gender and an age around yours. Pretty much, you can't have that whole 'what if this is secretly some creepy guy' air of distrust when you meet someone. It's really a great thing, because with the world like it is, that happens all the time. But SAO isn't like the real world. It's a world of its own. In fact, I may go so far as to question- what is truly the definition of the 'real world'? What separates Sword Art Online from the world we all know? It can all be summarized in one word- data. The world, it's a living thing. But everything is still information, data passed along nerves. MMOs like Sao emulate it, but you can't match that kind of data. It's close enough for me though, and that's why I tend to like these types of games so much. Either that or I truly take after HIM.

I realized I hadn't said anything while thinking of all of this, so I said, "Asuna? Do you want to get a drink at the nearby inn? My treat." I winked at the end so it wouldn't feel like a pressuring question. She still blushed a bit. Maybe I tend to have that kind of effect on people when I hang around them. But I can't deny she as me blush once or twice.

"I-I would love to!"

"Well, let's get going!"

After that, we arrived at the inn. It was pretty cheap, only costing about 1,300 Col (Col is the Sword Art Online equivalent of Yen, the Japanese currency. For all you Americans, each US dollar is about 120-125 Yen, it fluctuates.), but it was well worth it. We talked a lot, we learned a lot about each other, and then I paid for 2 rooms at the inn. It was a bit of a struggle since the dialogue was flawed, but still manageable and so we each ended up going to bed. It was an amazing night, and I couldn't wait to do it all again until the full release.

Well that was a… not as long chapter. I think that should pretty much wrap up this arc of the story, the flashback. For now… hehehehe. Anyways, by tomorrow I should be posting the NEXT chapter of the story, with my plans for updates changing from every day to really once every 0-3 days… sorry! This was Issy, signing off.