Hi!

How are you? I had just finished this chapter that I started to write this morning =). I hope that you like it this new chapter and let me some reviews.

Thanks to:

-Ms Isabella: Yeah! poor Matt. He was so depresed and nobody noted it =/

-Camila: Olá muito obrigado por ler a fic! Abraços e obrigada. (I am not sure if I write right sorry)

-goldistic: I think that this chapter is saddest than the last one. I hope that you like it.

-Portuguese Writer: Olá. thanks for you review. I am glad that you like it.

-Grace2020: yeah! If Gabby wasn't there Probably he will die. But she love him and she and she would not leave him alone because of that.

-M. Louise E: Thanks for your review. All of them were waitinh that his firefighter brother wake up :p

-jscat2: yeah! Matt will be ok but he is going to have a long road of recovering.

-TheShadowedVeil: thanks for the follower.

-Beemer27: Thanks for the follower.

I already have some ideas for the next chapter. And I will start writting again the next weekend because as I say previously dring the next week I will not be able to write anything. I am sorry. When I come back I will write the next chapter of my fic "Let her go" that Matt now wake up in that Fic and it's time that he recover.

I hope that you like this chapter.

See you next week!

Namine Redfield

Chapter 4: A secret place

Matt woke up not knowing where he was. The only thing that he knew was that he was in somewhere in the countryside and there were a lot of trees and some rocks; in the middle there was a big lake and a little waterfall in the background.

Suddenly, some forgotten memories and flashes came to his memory. In this lake was where Hallie and he spent their first holidays completely alone and as a couple. It was only during one week, but that week was amazing for him. He surprised her renting a small cottage. They swam and fished in the lake without anyone bothering them. Apart of that, that place was so special for him, because it was where they made love by the first time eight years ago. He started to cry because he is never going to see her again and he missed her so much. During the last two weeks everything he sees, touches or even smells reminded to her.

"You are up" someone said behind him

"Hallie?" he said dried his cries. It was her. Happy and he ran to her and hugged her.

"Hi Matt" she said smiling

"I can't believe" he said surprised "you come back baby. Everything was a nightmare" and he kissed her in her lips.

"Matt" she said broken the kiss and the huge "It wasn't a nightmare. I died that night before the fire start"

He looked really shocked after what she said. How that was possible if she was there with him?

"Well" he said holding her hands "It doesn't matter; now, I am with you. And nothing will separate us, not again."

"no Matt. This is not your place. You do not belong here. But don't worry you are in good hands. I knew the doctors that are treating you and they will do everything that they can to make you back from the coma"

"So I am in coma?"

"Yeah. You have to wake up Matt"

"What will happen if I don't wake up?"

"In the worst of the case, it's possible that you die" she said sad

"Hallie. I don't mind. I want to die"

"Matt, you do not want to die. What you really want it's being happy again. And believe me you are going to be happy again, you have someone waiting for you" she said referring to Gabby. "And all that you need is time, time for healing your heart" she said putting her hand in her chest where his heart was beating.

"Don't say me what I want. You don't know it" he said annoyed "Come on" he said after a few seconds of silence taking off his shirt

"What are you doing?" she said surprised

"Let's go swim in the lake like the first time that we came here. Do you remember?" he said trying to change the topic of their conversation. He also took off his pants and he was only dress with his blue boxers. "Come on Hallie, please. I want to swim with you again"

"alright" she said smiling and taking off her clothes except of her underwear.

Spite of what he said before, he was little worried about the theme of death. He knows that it could be possible that some friends of the firehouse are waiting that he comes back. However, he doesn't mind to die if that means that he will be with Hallie again. All that he wants in that moment was be with her.

/

Slowly, Gabby entered in the ICU. For her, it wasn't the first time that she entered in that unit of the hospital; she was there when her brother, Antonio, was shouted few months ago. However, this time it would be worse because the patient that she was seeing was Matt.

She came to the room in which he was and looked for a few seconds the person who was lying and motionless in the bed. He was using a breathing tube and had an oximeter in one of his fingers. His bare chest was covered by some wires that were connected to some machine that indicating his vital signs.

Before she entered to the room, she took a few deep breaths trying to relax herself. She entered and how there wasn't any chair in the room, she sat in the bedside near to him.

"Hi Matt" she took his hand being careful of his oximeter "You know, I had never seen you before so quiet; not even when you had that problem detective Voight or when you and I were annoyed because I asked him for help. Why you didn't tell us that you wanted to kill yourself? Why Matt?" she asked him crying "Right now, in the hallway there are a lot of people who want to know the answer of that question" she said drying the tears that fell down her cheeks "You know the pain that suppose for me to lose you? It's the most pain that I've ever felt. I am not able to understand why you did it. But, I need that you come back. I need that we spoke and tell us the truth. We need to clarify. I love you. I love you so much Matt. I know that maybe it doesn't work and I'm not your princess blue" she said smiling and she kissed him in his lips. To kiss him was a little difficult because of the tube but she didn't mind. The kiss only lasted a few seconds. After that she rest her check against his and cry in his shoulder.

/

Matt and Hallie swan in the lake during a while. Time passed and Matt was increasingly sure that he wanted to die. In the last few weeks he had never been so happy like now. After swam, they climbed the waterfall and laid down in the lush green grass to rest on and letting the sun dry them. Matt closed his eyes and when he opened he rolled on his side looking to Hallie. He put his hand around her waist, huge her and kiss her in her shoulder.

"I love you" he said in her ear.

She sat up on the grass and looked him seriously.

"What it's the matter?" he asked when she didn't say that she love him also.

"I have to tell you something. After you and I broke the last time, I went to South America, remember?" he nodded "After, that I didn't love you anymore"

"What?" he asked shocked "But when you came back and we met in your new house for change our things you and I made love. And you said that we were going to meet again in 24 hours and one minute"

"Yeah! But it was only sex Matt not love. I am sorry Matt I know that I should not have play with you like this. I am so sorry"

He raised and walked to the edge of the waterfall. Matt was completely shocked. She played with him that night and used for him just for having sex. He felt disappointed and ashamed.

"Why Hallie? I didn't mean anything to you!" he shouted

"Matt, looked me. It is time that you come back"

"I don't want to come back. I want to die" he said determined.

"Why did you do it Matt?"

"Do you thing that you reserve to know that?" he said angry

"Not after what I did. I was to tell you the following day. But that night it when happened the fire in the clinic" she walked up to him and said "I am sorry Matt. I am going do this because in the past you were the man of my life and I loved you. It is time that you come back to your life" and pushing him to the water.

He didn't expect that she pushed him so he fell into the water. He couldn't breathe under the water so little by Little he was losing consciousness while he was immersing in the water.

/

After Kissing him she continued sitting near to him waiting that he reacts, but nothing happen. Disappointed and sad she let the room. When she returned to the hallway, everyone stared waiting for her to speak.

"What happen?" Kelly asked

"Nothing, we have to wait" she said sad

"How did you see him?"Christine asked

"He is not reacting"

Suddenly, a lot of nurses start to enter in the ICU.

"Code blue. Cardiac arrest in the patient of the box 1"

"Box 1?" Gabby asked "It is the box in which Matt is"

Without loss any second, all of them entered in the ICU and ran to his room and looked him through the windows. An annoying beep was heard in the background indicating that Matt's heart was not beating anymore.

A nurse was taking off part of the breathing tube a put on him a ventilator while Dr. Nivans was doing cardiac massage and Dr. Stone prepared the defibrillators.

"Charge 250. Clear" she shouted putting on Matt's bare chest the defibrillators.

Matt's body moved violently after the defibrillator touched his body. The beep continued sounding.

"Come on Matt" Dr. Nivans shouted while he was doing again cardiac massage.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. The doctors and nurses were trying to recover Matt while the entire firehouse fifty-one was looking through the window how one of the best firefighter that they met was dying. The worst part was that everyone felt very powerless because they could not do anything to save him.

Christine was crying uncontrollably in the arms of her husband who also had tears in his eyes. Her mother had her head against the glass crying. Gabby and Kelly were also crying. And Finally Chief Boden Herrmann, Otis, Mills, Cruz, Vargas, Capp and Shay were in shock.

"Charge 350. Clear" Dr. Stone Shouted again.

One more time his body moved violently.

Dr. Stone looked to Dr. Nivans and let the defibrillators in the machine while she shook her head. She turned to look at them and left the room to talk to them. However, Dr. Nivans didn't mind what she said and he continue doing cardiac arrest.

"Come on Matt"

Suddenly, the miracle that nobody expected to happen happened. He opened his eyes and started to breathing by his own.

All who were outside the room looked at Dr. Nivans who had tears in his eyes and was laughing at the same time while he rubbed the Matt's forearm. Dr. Stone entered again in the room not believing that Matt was come back from the coma.

Outside all was confusion. No one knew what to think, Matt had died? Or had awakened? They didn't know it because the doctors and the nurses were in the middle and didn't allow them seeing what was happening. Finally the nurses move away, and they breathe again when they see that Matt had awakened.

Kelly embraced to Gabby and Shay, crying in the shoulder of the last one. Jim embraced her wife and kissed her in her forehead. Chief Boden rubbed Mrs. Casey's back and she hugged him.

/

After he woke up of the coma, the doctors made some test to him trying to determine if the pills leave any damage to him.

All the crew of the firehouse fifty one, except Kelly, Gabby and Chief Boden, came back to their houses to rest because the next day they were on shift. All of them promised to call them and come back as soon as the shift was finished. Gabby, Kelly and Chief Boden along with Christine, Nancy and Jim were waiting in the waiting room that the doctors tell them who Matt was. Nobody knew what to say so they were in silence.

Finally, Dr. Nivans arrived to the waiting room and sat in front of all of them looked them serious.

"In this moment he is sleeping. He is recovering, so the themes of the visits have to be one by one and only if he thinks that he could bear it"

"But you said that he is recovering" Nancy said

"Physically yes. However, what he did had let important damages in him"

"What kind of damage?" Gabby asked

"A person who acts as he acted normally doesn't understand the gravity of what he has done. Actually he could want to repeat it because inside still feels the same" he said sad that a young man like Matt wanted to kill himself.

"so, what you are trying to say is that it is possible that my brother want to kill himself again?" she asked not really sure if she understood what the doctor said

"Yes"

"How we can avoid it?" Kelly asked

"Making him reacts. In this moment he is enclosed in himself, but if we managed to get a feeling from him maybe making him laugh or cry in the next 24 hours we will have taken a giant step"

"And how can we do it?" Chief Boden asked

"I don't know"

Hi Again =)

I hope that you like it and let me some reviews.

Thanks for reading.

Have a good Sunday and a Lovely week.

Bye!

Namine Redfield