Awakening Quake
By Misha

Disclaimer in Chapter One.

A.N- This is a lot more serious than the previous chapter. We got romance in chapter nine, now we go back to addressing Skye's issues, or at least some of them.

Chapter Ten: Don't Let the Past Destroy You

"With those dance moves of yours, I think I should be paying more attention to teaching you hand-to-hand." Natasha told Skye the next morning. "You're definitely flexible."

Skye blushed. "I guess. I just like dancing."

"A certain blue-eyed super hero seemed to like it too." Natasha teased. "Still think he's not interested?"

Skye and Steve had danced a good portion of the evening and when they weren't dancing, they were talking. He had even walked her back to her apartment. He hadn't made any overt move, but even Skye had to admit it seemed like he was interested.

"I'm not sure why he's interested in me." Skye said quietly.

"Because you're smart, beautiful and can kick-ass?" Natasha asked. "It's a combination most men would find irresistible."

"In my experience the only men who have been interested are trouble." Skye told her, a tad bitterly. Her romantic history wasn't exactly a rousing success. It was full of men who had fed her false promises and lead her into trouble.

"I think we can both guarantee that Steve Rogers isn't." Natasha told her quietly. "He's one of the good guys, Skye."

"I know." Skye told her. She did know that. Of course, she knew that. He was Captain America. She sighed. "I just… I don't know how to handle the good guys. My experience is mostly with bad guys."

Like Ward. Who she had thought was one of the good guys. She'd thought he was different, that he was the one who would break her pattern and it turned out that he was even worse than all the others.

"Grant Ward was more than you SO." Natasha said flatly. It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes." Skye admitted. "We… I was in love with him. Or at least with who I thought he was." She sighed. "I fell hard for Ward and it made me realize I can't trust my heart."

It wasn't that she doubted Steve. He was Captain America, after all, but she doubted her ability to open up the way he would need. He deserved better.

"Loving the wrong man isn't a sin, Skye." Natasha told her. "Ward was a top S.H.I.E.L.D agent and a valuable HYDRA asset for a reason, because he could play a part perfectly."

"I bought it hook, line and sinker." Skye said bitterly. "I saw him as broken, but noble. I thought I was special because I was cracking through his armor, but it was all a lie."

"As I said, he was an expert liar." Natasha told her. "It also might not all have been lies." At Skye's startled look, Natasha continued. "I'm not defending him, the guy's scum, but I listened to what Coulson said and I read the reports. His actions after Garrett's death, his fixation with you, it makes me think that he really did fall for you. After all, even scum can have feelings."

"So I should forgive everything because his feelings might have been real?" Skye asked in disbelief. It was too much like the line Ward kept trying to sell her. That she should forgive him for being HYDRA, because his feelings for her were real. That he might be murdering scum, but he really loved her. She didn't expect to hear that same crap from Natasha.

"Hell, no." Natasha assured her. "You are much better off without him and I'll make sure you have the skills to take him down if he ever comes looking for you. I'm just saying you shouldn't beat yourself up for falling for his lies, because there might have been some truth there."

For some reason it made Skye feel a little bit better. But just a little bit. She still felt like the world's biggest fool for falling for Ward's lies.

"Are you still in love with him?" Natasha asked quietly.

"No." Skye said, though she wasn't 100% sure. She wanted to say that she felt nothing for Ward and it was slowly coming, but… If she truly felt nothing she would have shot him in the head in San Juan. There was a part of her that still felt something for Ward and she hated it.

"Then let him go." Natasha advised. "Chock it up to a mistake and move on. Holding on to the regret and the anger… Well, it's easy, but in the long run, you lose and he wins. Don't let Grant Ward turn you off of love forever. You deserve better than that."

Skye paused, considering the words. Was she letting Ward win be deciding to never risk another romantic attachment? Maybe, Natasha was right. Not that it would be easy, Skye never trusted easily to begin with and now she knew she'd be even more cautious.

However, it didn't seem that scary to trust Captain America. He was the ultimate good guy, though Skye still couldn't believe that she might have a chance with him.

"If you decide to trust yourself again, you're going to have to make the first move." Natasha told her, seeming to guess her thoughts. "Steve's sweet, but a little too cautious and polite. He would never want to push, so he'll hold back until he's sure you're ready and even then…"

Skye nodded. Though the idea of making a move on Captain America… She wasn't sure she was there yet. Oh, she'd definitely thought about it. A lot. But…

"We were going to work on hand to hand today?" She said suddenly, putting an end to the personal conversation.

"Yes." Natasha agreed, not pushing. "I know you have some training in this area, but I think we can push you further. Put that flexibility to good use. You're small and you're quick, that can be a deadly combination if you know what you're doing and I'm going to make sure you do."