A/N Tissue warning? Maybe? I'm a sap, so...see me below.
Fill Me with Your Poison Chapter 11
Edward had never seen his brother so excited, which was saying a lot because Emmett had always been loud and excitable. This time, he was quiet but practically vibrating with happiness and need. Edward tempered his amusement at the frown on Bella's face. She was watching Jasper, whose jealousy and unhappiness seemed to grow by the moment.
Edward excused himself and went and sat next to his unhappy brother. "It will happen for you one day, Jasper. You need to be patient."
"It's hard. I feel…I don't know. The love coming off you and Bella, and now Emmett…it's too much to bear."
Maybe you should send him away for a while? Bella wondered.
Edward was at a loss about what to do for his friend and brother. If he could make Jasper's mate appear, he would, but unfortunately, that was one of the few things out of Edward's control.
"You know why you're feeling it so strongly, don't you?" Edward asked, making Jasper's frown only deepen.
"I don't want to hear that bullshit right now, Edward. El is wrong."
Eleazar, another member of their family, swore up and down that Jasper had a gift for feelings and that if he would focus on it, he'd be able to eventually learn to manipulate and control the feelings of others. Eleazar's gift was being able to recognize that of others, and he'd yet to be wrong. His gift was pivotal in the rise of the Volturi and instrumental in the creation of many gifted and powerful vampires.
"If he's wrong, why are you so bothered by Emmett meeting his mate? And me finding mine? I'll admit, if the tables were turned I'd feel a little lonely, but I wouldn't be wallowing in self-pity and jealousy like you seem to be."
"Don't be so sure of that," Jasper muttered, making Edward scowl. "You'd hear all the thoughts, even if you didn't feel it the way I do. It would annoy the shit out of you."
Edward had to admit that was probably true. "Maybe you need to get out of here for a while."
"I can't leave. Maria…" He rolled his eyes. Edward toyed with volunteering to help his brother, but he really didn't want to have to deal with watching over Maria.
"What if we ask El to stop by? Maybe he can help you learn to control it."
Jasper looked across the room to where a glowing Emmett was talking animatedly with Bella. He didn't want to leave his brothers or their mates. A part of him, deep down inside, was happy that they were happy. It was just that the more prevalent part was lonely, angry, and jealous.
"Yeah, call him."
"Do you want to go?"
"No, I can play nice for the night. And I am curious as to who the big lug fell for. Never thought I'd see the day that he'd fall in love." And that was a big part of it. Jasper had always had Emmett as a partner in crime. Edward was way more selective when it came to hooking up with females, but Emmett had always worked in tandem with Jasper. It was hard to accept that he was on his own now.
Emmett's head whipped up and his nostrils flared. "She's here!" And he was down the stairs without another word.
Bella and his brothers waited patiently until he reappeared, holding the hand of a beautiful blonde woman in a tight red dress that showed off her body to perfection. She was stunning, and they could all see why Emmett was so entranced with her. She was lovelier than most female vampires.
When Edward had that thought, Bella shot him a look, which made him shake his head.
Nobody is as beautiful as you are, my love. You put every vampire, human, and whatever other female you can think of to shame.
Nice save, Edward. Very nice.
I do my best, my beauty.
"Rose, these are my brothers, Edward and Jasper, and that's Edward's fiancé, Bella. Guys, this is my Rosalie."
They could all see the nerves written plainly on her face, and Edward stood and approached slowly. "Welcome to Venom, Rosalie. We're so happy that Emmett has met you."
She gave him a hesitant smile. "Thank you. It's an impressive club." She glanced around, taking in the rich décor. "I'm really not sure what I'm doing here."
"You're here to be with me, Rosie," Emmett told her proudly.
She arched an eyebrow at that but didn't say anything, taking the seat he offered her next to Bella. With one last glance at Jasper, Edward went over to sit next to his mate. He didn't like being across the room from her. Jasper sighed but joined them at the table Emmett had chosen.
"Emmett hasn't told us very much about you," Edward said. And he wasn't very likely to, judging from the way he was staring at Rosalie with a moony look on his face. "What is it you do, Rosalie?"
She glanced around warily. "Well, I work at Dade Electronics. Um, that's where we met. I'm twenty-three. I like anything mechanical, be it TVs or cars or whatever."
Emmett positively beamed at that news. He loved anything to do with cars. It was clear to him that Rosalie was perfect for him. He slid his arm around her, and she jumped at the contact.
"Um! Well, that's about it, I guess?"
"I'm sorry…do we make you nervous?" Edward asked. Emmett hadn't mentioned anything about her being terrified of vampires. That was a bit of an issue.
"Well, sort of. I don't really know why I'm here. I mean, Emmett and I talked, and then he pretty much demanded that I come by tonight, and for some reason, I agreed even though I had plans and, what's happening?"
Perhaps you should help her out, love. She might take it better from you, since Emmett clearly hasn't explained mating to her.
Bella took the conversational ball that Edward mentally passed her. "Rose…may I call you Rose?" At the nod, Bella continued. "What do you know about vampires?"
"Just, you know, what they've said on TV. I've never been to one of these clubs or anything. Oh, God, did you invite me here to eat me?"
"That's one way of putting it," Jasper muttered, earning a glare from both of his brothers. "What?"
Rose's heart beat began to stutter as she hurried to her feet. "I don't want that! I have to go! You can't bite me unless I say so. It's the law!"
"Nobody's going to bite you," Bella assured her, taking her arm gently and guiding her back into her seat. "I promise, nobody here would ever hurt you. It's not possible for us to do so, because of what you mean to Emmett."
"What do you mean, what I mean to Emmett? What's going on?"
This is going wonderfully, Bella thought sourly to Edward.
I guess it can't always go as easily as it did for me with you, he thought with a grin.
Are you calling me easy, Mr. Cullen?
Only for me, Miss Swan.
You'll pay for that later.
Edward grinned wolfishly. I look forward to that, my love.
"Cut the shit. You're scaring the crap out of the poor girl," Jasper told them. "You're Emmett's mate, blondie. That means he loves you and we couldn't hurt you because it would basically kill him. Or he'd kill us. Whichever happened first. So stop freaking out."
"He loves me? What? He doesn't even know me! I have to go."
"Rosie, baby…"
"Don't you baby me! Why didn't you tell me any of this before I came here and got ambushed by your weird family? What's with those two, anyway? Why do they seem to be talking to one another without saying a word?"
Jasper laughed. She's feisty as hell. Worse than Maria. Emmett's in for it, for eternity. This may be fun to watch after all.
"Sorry," Bella apologized quietly, glaring at all the males in the room. They hadn't handled things well at all, and it apparently fell to her to fix it. "Rose, one of the things that we weren't taught about vampires is that they mate for life. When they find the right person, they just know, and that's the end for them. They'll never want another person, or vampire, ever again. We humans don't feel it quite the same way, but we do feel the draw, the need to be with that vampire. I'm assuming you felt something for Emmett?"
Rose looked uncomfortable, but she nodded. "I felt attracted to him, sure. And I came here even though I didn't really want to. And I haven't run away, even though you're all kind of psycho."
Bella laughed lightly. "I walked into this club as a human around a month ago. Edward appeared before me, and I was struck dumb at the sight of him. Everything about him drew me in, and I knew I had to be with him forever." Edward raised her hand to his lips and brushed a kiss across her knuckles. "I signed the pledge that very night and became a vampire without a second thought."
Rose's dark blue eyes got very wide at Bella's words. "You…is that why I'm here? You want to turn me into a vampire?"
Emmett took her hand. "Of course I do, Rosie. I want you to be mine forever. Don't you want that?"
She shook her head and tried to tug her hand out of Emmett's grip, but that was impossible until he felt like letting go. "I didn't come here for that. I came to see you, to see what this was."
"Nobody said you had to turn today, Rosie. I mean, I'd love for you to, but we can wait until you're ready. I just want you to be with me. We can get to know one another and take our time. I don't expect you to be as impetuous as Bella."
"Hey!" Bella protested, laughing. "I knew what I wanted, and I took it. I don't regret it." Her eyes met Edward's. "I don't regret anything."
"Well that's all la-di-da and good for you," Rose said acidly, "but I'm not interested in becoming a vampire. Not now, not ever."
It occurred to Edward that none of them had ever even considered the possibility of Rose not wanting to be one of them. What if Bella hadn't wanted to become a vampire? What would he have done? One look at her face, and he knew he would have badgered her to become like him until the end of time. He'd have made it his life's mission.
"Why not, Rosie?"
"My name is not Rosie, Emmett. It's Rosalie or Rose. And there are plenty of reasons why not. The first being that I'm not letting some mystic mate nonsense dictate my life!"
"Is it any wonder I'm crazy about you?" Emmett asked, blown away by the way her cheeks colored with temper, the way her eyes snapped at him. She didn't have an ounce of fear over facing down an abnormally large vampire, nor his well-meaning, meddling family.
"Stop that!" She slapped his arm and bit back a yell when her hand struck that hard muscle. "Ow! Damn you!"
"I'm sorry, Rose." He pressed a kiss to her hand and made her eyes flutter, which caused him to grin. "You can hit me all you want when you're one of us, but for now, you'd better refrain. I don't want anything to happen to your lovely and talented hands."
"Ugh! Just stop it!" She pulled her hand away. "I'm not going to be one of you. You just get that thought out of your head right now."
"Why not? We're strong. We live forever. We're rich. Beautiful. Powerful. What more could you possibly want?"
Edward and Bella heard the answer in her head before she gave it, and they both gasped.
Rose stood, and Emmett stood with her. "I'll give you anything, Rose. Just be with me."
"I want children, Emmett. Babies. That's what I've always wanted, and I know damn well you can't give me that."
Silence met her declaration, and Jasper, Edward, and Bella looked at one another helplessly. They didn't want to be there for this very personal conversation, and they could all feel that this was a topic Rosalie wasn't going to budge on.
Edward cleared his throat. "Maybe we should…"
"Don't go," Rose told them, staring up at the thunderstruck Emmett. "I'm not going to be here for much longer, and he probably needs someone to talk to after I leave."
Her face softened, and she lifted a hand to touch his cheek. Emmett leaned into her caress, closing his eyes, but was unable to hide the devastation that her words had caused him. She truly did want the one thing that he couldn't give her, and he hated himself in that moment for failing her.
"All my life, I've wanted to be a wife and a mother, Emmett. You talk of eternity and power and endless beauty, and that's all great, but that's nothing I aspire to. I'm a simple woman with simple wants and needs. I feel the connection you're talking about. I do. And a part of me is dying on the inside right now because I know I'm hurting you, and I hate doing that. Everything in me rebels at the thought-everything except that part of me that wants to be a mother."
"We could, I dunno, I mean, you could stay human, and there's artificial insemination, right? You could have a baby, and then…"
"And then I could become a vampire and watch my baby grow up and grow old and die? Or do I turn them once they get married and have children? That's not what I want, Emmett. I want several children. I want to be able to hold them without fear that my strength will kill them. I want to fix scraped knees without wanting to suck them dry, and I want to hold them against me and let them hear my heart beat, to comfort them when they're sad. I can't do any of that if I become a vampire."
It took all of Jasper's will not to collapse from the pain that was rolling off his brother and Rosalie in waves. Edward and Bella were both mired in a whirlwind of thoughts as Emmett sought for an answer that would make Rose be with him. Bella rubbed at her chest, which hurt for her brother.
"What if you stay human and you do all that, and I just wait for you, until you're really old and sick? Then maybe…"
"Then maybe you let me die, like I'm meant to. Emmett, I have nothing against your kind. I don't consider you an abomination like some. I even admit to some curiosity about your lives and your strength and abilities. But I don't want it enough to give up everything I've ever dreamed of to have it. To have you. I think you're incredible, and I'm probably an idiot to give you up, to not even try, but I know that if I let you in, I'll give in. And then, some part of me will hate you for taking away what I always wanted. And I don't want to hate you. The thought of that makes me sick." She glanced around, her eyes wild. "All of this makes me sick. I have to go."
"But Rose…" He was ready to get down on his knees and beg if he had to. He felt as if a part of him was already missing, even though she hadn't yet walked away. He couldn't let her go. He wouldn't.
"I'm engaged, Emmett." He winced as if he'd been slapped. "I have a fiancée who wants exactly what I want. I love him."
"You can't." No. The word kept echoing in his head over and over. It wasn't possible.
"I do. Maybe it's not the same as whatever this is"-she gestured between them-"but he makes me happy and he'll give me what I want."
"You can't. It's not possible." Emmett didn't know how to argue with her, to convince her that their mate bond was the strongest bond on earth. That's what he'd always been told, and he felt it. Why couldn't she? He looked to his siblings for help, but they were frozen just like he was. Not one of them knew what to do.
"I'm sorry, Emmett. I have to go."
"Please, Rose, don't you feel it? You're going to destroy us both if you walk away," he pleaded, because he didn't know how he could possibly live if she walked out the door. The pain that was flooding his body would surely overtake him, and he'd wither away and die.
"No, Emmett, I'll destroy us both if I stay. I don't want to hate you. Just let me go."
"I can't." He was pretty sure his heart was breaking in half inside his body. Who knew he could feel that from the long-dormant organ?
"If you love me, if I'm really your mate, then you'll love me enough to let me go."
And with those words, Emmett released hold of her arm. Because she was his mate and he would do anything for her, even if it was to suffer eternally without her.
Rose picked up her bag and moved away from the unmoving vampires as quickly as her feet would carry her. When she reached the stairs, she turned and took one final look at Emmett. "I'm sorry." She didn't look back as she ran down the stairs.
Bella moved first, wrapping her arms around Emmett as his legs seemingly gave out and he collapsed to the floor. He sobbed soundlessly, his big body shaking as she held on for dear life. Her pain-filled eyes met Edward's, and he hurried over to wrap his arms around Bella and Emmett. For his part, Jasper was overcome with the emotions that Emmett was feeling, and his entire body shook with the effort it took to get to his feet and go to his brother. He echoed Rose's last words, overcome with sorrow for his earlier jealousy. He'd rather be alone for the rest of his life than to feel the way his brother did right now.
Nobody knew how much time went by, but the club emptied and closed before any of them moved. Emmett's thoughts were filled with hurt and pain. Edward's, Bella's, and Jasper's hearts all bled for him.
Eventually, Jasper took a deep breath and dug deep inside himself, to the part where all the pain was centered. He remembered what Eleazar had told him, and he focused on that point and pushed it out of the way, trying to find some happiness. He thought of the happiness that Edward and Bella had given off since the moment they met, and he brought that out of them, using his mind to send that feeling outward.
It took a while and his head hurt from the effort he'd put forth, but eventually, some of the pain receded.
Emmett sat up and looked at him blankly. "What did you do? I can feel something coming from you, and it doesn't feel as bad."
"He used his talent to take some of your pain away." Edward put a grateful hand on Jasper's shoulder. "It's taking all of his concentration to help you."
Emmett shook his head. "I need to feel it. I need-"
"You need some time, Emmett. I know, better than anyone, what you've lost." Edward looked at Bella, the love for her overwhelming. If she'd walked away, he'd have been even more useless than Emmett was. He wanted to give his brother platitudes, to tell him that maybe Rose would change her mind, but he and Bella both knew that she wouldn't. They'd seen inside that strong mind of hers, and it was made up.
"And I know what you're thinking," he reminded his brother gently. Emmett thought of stalking Rose, finding her fiancée, and killing him. "That won't change her mind, and she'll hate you then. That would be worse, I think."
"What do I do?" he asked quietly, the fight leaving him as he slumped over again.
Jasper grabbed his bicep and sent another wave of happiness at his brother.
"You live. You go on, and we'll help you. Marcus has gone on without his mate for centuries."
"Great…I can be like Marcus, the morose motherfucker," Emmett spat sarcastically, shaking his head.
Marcus was indeed a very depressing individual. Edward couldn't see his brother turning into that, but who knew.
"Marcus didn't have us," Bella told Emmett, brushing her fingers through his hair. "We may not be your mate, but we love you, and you're stuck with us, forever."
Emmett worked up a smile for her. "You don't know how lucky you are, brother."
Edward did, but he didn't need to rub it in. "Maybe you and Jasper should take off for a bit. Run up to Alaska. Meet with El. Clear your heads."
Get his rocks off with Tanya or Irina, Jasper thought. Maybe if he got him laid…
Edward shook his head. That wasn't something Emmett needed right now.
"I think it's a good idea." Emmett slowly got to his feet. "I'm sorry you had to see that, but I don't know if I could have born it without you."
"You always have us, Emmett. Call me if you need anything."
"I got him," Jasper promised. The more he practiced, the easier it was to send Emmett the help he needed. Maybe Eleazar could help him help his brother even more.
Emmett hugged Bella tightly, thanking her for her support, before doing the same to Edward. "We'll be back, hopefully before…" He broke off, unable to talk about their impending nuptials.
"Don't even think about it. We'll wait for you, if that's what you want, and if not, we'll understand." Even though it interfered with Edward's plans, he didn't care in that moment. If he had to wait to take care of Aro, he would. Emmett was all that mattered right now.
"We'll see you soon," Jasper promised, leading the giant vampire away like a parent guiding an unsteady child.
Bella and Edward waited several minutes after they left to speak.
"That was the worst thing I've ever seen," Bella whispered. Edward wrapped Bella in his arms as she sobbed quietly. "I should have tried harder to convince her that being mated was the best thing she'd ever feel. Maybe if I'd-"
"Shhh, love. You heard her thoughts. It wouldn't have mattered what you or Emmett said. She wants to be a mother more than anything."
His mate flinched at those words. "You see? I don't understand that. And I feel selfish for even thinking about myself right now, but how can she love her unborn children more than my mother loved me? She met her mate and walked away without a second thought, but Rose gave up hers for children she doesn't even have. How is it possible?"
Edward tightened his grip on Bella. "I don't know, my beauty, but I promise that we'll get your answers soon." He was going to text Demetri shortly. He had to know something by now.
"Come. Let's go to bed. I want to hold you for a while." Everything in him screamed to be one with his mate. Watching Emmett lose his made him desperate to reclaim his own.
Bella heard his desperation and kissed him softly. "I need you, too. I'm not going anywhere. Never."
Her words assured him, and shortly after, when he joined with her, he felt right again.
A/N Alright, you all know how I feel about the big guy and that was one of the hardest things I've written. I hate hurting my Em, but since I've expanded this story from the original one/shot, the theme of mating has been something that I've wanted to explore. And we all know that in canon, Rose made it pretty clear that if she'd had the choice to live as human or be a vamp, she'd have chosen the former. Here, I gave her the choice she didn't have in the originals. It contrasts with what Bella and Renee chose, and raises the question that Bella asked above. If Rose can walk away from her mate for children that don't even exist yet, why didn't Renee? One of the many things we're waiting to find out I know! Answers to come!
Thanks for all the love you're giving my daily updates! I usually don't have the patience to write out a whole story but it's definitely fun doing it this way. See you tomorrow with more!