The Poseidon PJOmetronic is another one of our more dangerous models. Once again, PJOmetronics Inc holds no liability whatsoever for a raging Sea God.

Overview:

Your Poseidon PJOmetronic will contain the following:

1. One Poseidon, God of the Sea, Rivers, Earthquakes, Horses

2. One Olympian Throne

3. One Poseidon's Trident

4. One Undersea Palace

Note: Trying to take away items 2-4 will likely result in being divulged in several feet of water.

The obvious thing to do first is to set up the throne on Olympus. But besides that, your Poseidon PJOmetronic will also want to place his Undersea Palace in a suitable location. A large body of water (a bucket when considering his dimensions) is preferred. A water tank might also work, but do not try to do the toilet. There have been several unfortunate... accidents when people tell the Sea God that he has to live in a urinal. A bath tub isn't the best choice either, as you're probably going to need it and you can't use whatever your Poseidon PJOmetronic is using as a home.

If you're really having trouble, just make a deep hole somewhere, like your backyard. Your Poseidon PJOmetronic could help in making it if you tell him there's no other way, and then fill said hole with rainwater. Place the Undersea Palace on the surface gently, and it will sink by itself to the bottom. You don't need to take care of the pool of water after that and it will remain salty year round thanks to Poseidon's powers. Several fish will also gather their inexplicably. Even we don't know how, we just know that it will happen and that it's necessary. Kelp might also begin to grow and you might hear cheers and shouts from the depths. This is perfectly normal, DO NOT try to go to the bottom. You'll just end up disturbing the placement of everything. Instead, ask them to put a water-proof webcam beneath the surface so you can check up on them.

Remember, failure to meet with a viable water body and/or Olympian throne will result in a huge tantrum. You should probably increase both your flood and earthquake insurance before buying this product.

Your Poseidon's PJOmetronic's favorite pastime will be arguing. You'll probably end up hearing him having a heated conversation with either Zeus or Athena late into the night. If you can't sleep, a good way to take care of the problem is grab your left shoe and hurl it at Mt. Olympus. That seems to get them to be quiet.

If you're having trouble getting your Poseidon PJOmetronic to behave, a good tactic is to tell him that 'Zeus did the same thing without any complaints. I guess you're just not as good as him.' Sibling rivalry is a great way to force them to co-operate.

Your Poseidon PJOmetronic will not behave as bossy as your Zeus, and the best way to bond is to go on fishing or boating trips together. A visit to the aquarium is also recommended. Sometimes, some small miniature horses will appear around Poseidon without any explanation whatsoever. Just treat it as if it is normal.

If you and your Poseidon PJOmetronic do get along, he might agree to help you with water crises and guide you whenever you're out boating. The sea has almost endless bounties, and he might share some with you.

Troubleshooting:

Dirty Pond: Sometimes, the place where your Poseidon PJOmetronic has built his palace will become grimy and dirty due to some circumstances. He can probably take care of it, but you might need to step in in a few instances.

Grouchiness: Sometimes it just seems that your Poseidon PJOmetronic has woken up on the wrong side of the bed. Putting on whale and ocean noises generally cheers him up.

Rebellion: Occasionally, the Gods of Olympus will try to overthrow Zeus and lock him in a golden net. If this happens, yo should probably try to mediate things so they don't become ugly.