Chapter 4 – Star Wars
MUST READ A/N: (Being formal) Hello fellow authors and readers! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! I really appreciate all of it and I'm sorry if I don't reply. See, I'm really busy right now because of last minute requirements at school… And I also apologize for being so late at updating this. Yeah I know, it's already March. Okay, so I got all these requests on Valentine's movies, but sadly I don't know any of it. I haven't got the time to watch it so yeah. And I promised to myself that I won't add my own request for a movie here except for a special occasion like my b-day. (I know, it's a pretty lame promise) But I will try to make it up to you now! I'm sorry to say that this isn't a Valentine's movie since Valentine's Day is like, over, but an action/adventure/sci fi movie! It will also be two chapters long so consider it as my peace offering to you guys. I would also like to thank 'Guest' for the request and also the fact that I just watched it with my family earlier today. It's really AMAZING! I promise I'll give the others a chance when I got the time. But for now, read on.
BTW here they're kinda like in the 2k12 version but there's a mix of 2k3. I fear they might act a little OOC. Mostly Leo. But you should cut him some slack. That's how I think he would act if he wasn't the bossy overprotective leader at the moment. And also, they're watching the movie from oldest release to newest as I did. So specifically, the order is Star Wars IV: A New Hope (1977), SW V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980), SW VI: The Return Of The Jedi (1983), SW I: The Phantom Menace (1999), SW II: Attack Of The Clones (2002), (and my personal favorite of them all) SW III: Revenge Of The Sith (2005). I know, it's a pretty weird order. And also, here the turtles are just randomly commenting on certain scenes from movies' 1 to 6 so I can fit it all in. (mostly, it's just Mikey and Raph) So sorry for all those who're expecting real scenes.
PS: there is a line break between every scene and it may get confusing, because some of the scenes have dialogues only. This is my first time doing that so forgive me if I did it wrong. And for those of you who haven't watched Star Wars yet, this will get REALLY confusing. I promise you that.
And guess what? (surprise ^o^ surprise) You'll find out later in the chapter. *winks*
Movie: Star Wars IV – A New Hope
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"Okay, I CANNOT believe this. Fearless is a freakin sci fi NERD?!" Raph bellowed unbelievably. Leo glared at him mildly offended. "So what if I'm one? And don't call me 'nerd.'"
"REALLY!? I couldn't believe it either!" Mikey collapsed on the couch, his mouth forming an 'O' shape in mock surprise as Leo felt his right eye twitch.
"Quit exaggerating! At least I'm not like some guy here who watches very interesting videos after training."
Raph suddenly froze, and slowly faced Leo with a deer-in-the-headlights expression. "Y-You saw that?" He asked sheepishly. "I-I mean, I do NOT!"
"Well… you do. And if you keep on calling me 'nerd' I'll tell your horrendous secret to Splinter."
Raph shot him an annoyed look, "Don' .Dare.NERD."
Leo suddenly gasped melodramatically and Don tried to hold back his giggle. "Oh.. but I can't keep secrets right Raph? You always tell me that I'm a tattletale. Well I'm going to prove it right now. OH MASTER SPLIN- MMMPPHH?!" He said in surprise as a quick pair of strong hands covered his whole face in an attempt to make him shut up. Don and Mike broke it right then. It's funny and amusing when their two older brothers just tease each other instead of bashing each other's heads in. Better savor the moment while it lasts.
"Guys, when are we going to watch Leo's sci fi nerdy movie?" Don grinned mischievously at Leo's annoyed look. Spoke too soon.
"Not you too Don…" Leo sighed. "Besides, you're even worse than I am, nerdy science geek."
"Burn." Raph smirked at the annoyed Don.
"Ooh, OOH! I heard Star Wars is really good! It's like, gained worldwide fame and won so many awards and stuff. Great choice Leo, I've been dying to watch this too!" Mikey squealed like a little kid.
"Who's the nerd now?" Leo smirked.
"Hey! Don't you even allow one small scratch on that! Casey'll kill us if he even saw a minor line in there!"
"Ugh! Casey too?!" Raph groaned. "Am I the only one normal in here?"
"Nope, the position goes to Master Splinter."
"Aww crud."
"Shh! SSSSHHH! It's starting! Quick Don, fire up the volume to 100!" Mikey commanded.
"Yes sir.." Don rolled his eyes and pushed some buttons.
A long time ago in a galaxy far far away…
…
"SHIT!" They all yelped and Raph cursed when some chorus of trumpets and horns suddenly erupted from the speakers in a thunderous sound. Don quickly dropped the volume down to 80 and they all sighed in relief.
"Well that was unexpected."
"Plan to give us a heart attack Leo?"
"It's not my fault! Mikey turned up the volume."
"It's not me! It's Don!"
"You told me to!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"If you say 'did not' again Mike I'll tell them what you're always doing in your room at night." Raph threatened and Mikey shrunk to his seat. (A/N: And, no. it's not what ya'll are thinking.) The others looked at them suspiciously and finally settled on interrogating one of them after this. Suddenly, they all noticed that a bunch of words were going up the screen and was about halfway through. Leo quickly yelled, "Hey, that's important! Rewind it and read it!"
And so they did. But they did not expect the blaring sound of the trumpets again and they all jumped.
"Would ya quit rewinding it there Don?!"
"Well, it was pretty funny to see your faces when you're shocked!" Don laughed.
"Read it! You're going to miss it!" Leo cried and they all turned their attention back on the TV.
Later on…
"That Darth Vader's a total badass! I like him already. Especially his deep voice and evillishness!"
"Language Raphael."
"Yeah, and that's not even a real word!"
"Whatever."
"Wow. How did that old man Kenobi changed the Storm troopers mind?" Mikey asked.
"See how he waved his hand? He's using a power called the Force to manipulate the minds of others." Leo patiently explained.
"Ooh.. COOL! I want one!"
"Okay, that C-3PO's a total idiot. I thought he's a smart robot-"
"Actually, it's called a droid-"
"WHATEVER it's called, he's just like some extra hogging all the cameras."
"Leave him alone Raph. Later on you'll find out his true purpose and story on why he's there in the film." Leo said with a mysterious tone. They all gave him a 'really?' look and he shrugged.
"Wow. The igloo's on fire." Raph commented as they watched the scene where the protagonist, Luke Skywalker, looks sadly at his once complete and functional home and his dead aunt and uncle.
"I bet it exploded when Aunt Beru's cooking was left forgotten." Mikey joked and they both laughed hysterically, confusing the other two turtles. (I actually thought that at first. One scene it shows Luke's aunt cooking and the next, the house is all blew up. My sister and I laughed it off too)
"Who's the guy with the big monkey?"
"His name is Han Solo. He's the captain and pilot of his own ship, 'The Millennium Falcon'. It's a really fast ship mind you." This time, it was Don giving out the free trivias.
"I want that one too!"
"Whoa... he can see the little laser robot dude without seeing?!"
"That sounds really smart Mikey." Don said sarcastically.
"He senses it using the Force and tries to block all of its attacks using that glowing laser sword, the lightsaber. It's kinda like when we are fighting around blindfolded so don't sound too amazed." Leo explained yet again.
"Ugh, I'm already tired of all this 'The-Almighty-Force-crap'."
Leo glared at him.
"I still think it's cool."
"That princess is so dang beautiful." Raph smirked as he watched said princess, Leia Organa, get rescued from imprisonment by Luke.
"With the curly buns and all…"
"And her figure…"
"And her-"
"Just shut up both of you."
"NOOO!" Mikey screamed alongside Luke as they watched Obi Wan get killed by the antagonist, Darth Vader.
"That would've been pretty awesome if there's blood and we actually saw the old man get beheaded. Instead, he disappeared. Lame."
"Shut up, I'm in the middle of a drama." Mikey took a deep breath and screamed 'NOOO!' yet again.
"Okay… so the Death Star's weakness is a freakin exhaust pipe leading straight down the core which is the space station's only weak spot? Who the hell is the friggin designer of that and why's he so stupid?"
"Maybe the Death Star's core needed to breathe or something?"
Slight pause. "You're the designer aren't you?"
Movie 1 finally finished..
"Wow. That was pretty awesome!" Mikey grinned. "I love ya already Leo!"
"I know right?" Leo was totally grinning like he was pleased because somebody finally took a liking to his movie choice.
"Yeah, it was good."
"Love the technology. What do you say I invent a hyperdrive for the Shellraiser?"
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Movie: Star Wars V – The Empire Strikes Back
"Movie two is on!" Mikey happily inserted a new cd to replace the other one.
"Actually, it's movie 5. See, the first movies are Star Wars 4,5,6 while Star Wars 1,2,3 are the prequels. I was pretty amazed how the director fitted them all so well." That was Donnie.
"Didn't understand a word at all."
A long time ago in a galaxy far far away…
"TURN THE VOLUME DOWN DONNIE!"
"I'M TRYING! Stupid remo-"
They all jumped yet again in surprise at the thunderous sound and shot glares at Don who smiled sheepishly.
"What the hell are they doing in an uninhabitable, blizzard-filled, ice covered, frozen planet in who-knows-where anyways?!"
"Actually, they do know where they are. They're in an uninhabitable, blizzard-filled, ice co-"
"One more word Don. One more word…"
"Who's the old green elf?"
"Well, believe it or not, his name is Master Yoda. The grand master of all Jedi back in his time. He'll teach Luke how to become a Jedi now since Obi-Wan's dead."
"Kinda reminds me of Master Splinter…"
Long pause.
"Ya know what Mike? I'll tell Splinter that you think of him as a crazy old green elf who likes to whack on big stupid machine droids with his cane while fighting over a flashlight."
"NOOO! He'll kill m-"
"Tell me what my sons?"
Long pause again.
"Holy crud."
"Whew. I didn't think we'll get away with that. Good thing the scene played where Yoda was speaking all wise now or else I would have died."
"Yeah… good thing."
They didn't notice Leo smirking evilly again.
"OH, MASTER SPLI-MMMPPHHFFFRRGGPPPHH?!"
"Okay, now I can freely say that Luke's a stubborn, idiot kid. Can you believe it?! He disobeyed two Jedi masters in one go!"
"Like you."
…
"I swear I'll kill you right now Leo."
"What happened to that guy Indiana Jones?"
"I told you, his name is Han Solo here."
"Whatever. So what happened to him?"
"He's frozen in carbonite."
"Care to explain that Fearless?"
"I'd rather not."
"I would!"
"Don…"
"What would happen to him now? Is he dead?" Mikey's voice.
"No. He's still alive. And in perfect hibernation." Creepy. Don said that together at the same time with that Calrissian guy on TV. And it's the EXACT same words.
"WHAAAATTTT?!" They all gasped in complete shock (except for Leo) as the truth is finally revealed.
"Okay, let me get this straight. Darth Vader, the guy who's always like 'ho-purr ho-purr' in his irremovable helmet, is Luke's FATHER?!"
"Holy crap, the revelation…"
"You think Luke's evil too?"
"Possibly."
"OH SHOOT! Look at Luke's hand! It's gone!" That was Mikey.
"Ya only noticed that now?"
"Yeah.."
"Poor kid. But I don't think he'll die now."
Just then, The Millennium Falcon swooped in to save Luke from falling to his death.
"Good call Raph."
End of movie 2…
"I don't really like that one. It's pretty boring. Well, except for that stinkin cool revelation!" Mikey then attempts to make a grumpy face and faces Leo while breathing 'ho-purr ho-purr' in his face. "Join me Leonardo... *ho-purr* I AM your father!"
"No.. it can't be.. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!"
They all laughed hard after Leo said that. It's hard to take the leader that seriously. Even Leo cracked a few laughs himself.
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Movie: Star Wars VI – Return Of The Jedi
"Okay, why was it entitled 'Return of the Jedi?'"
"Obviously, it means the Jedi returns."
"Quit it knucklehead. I meant, how will the Jedi return if all of them are extinct?"
…
"Good question." Donnie said.
"You'll find it out soon enough.." Leo said mysteriously and in a creepy tone of voice that Raph eyed him warily.
"Seriously dude, stop that. It's freaking me out."
"Oh, I'm freaking the tough turtle Raph out? That is huge news! I should go tell Splinter. OH MASTE- MMMPH-ARGH!" Leo barely escaped Raph's grip and he grinned mischievously at the red turtle.
"Why do you keep doing that?!"
Leo shrugged. "Because it's fun?"
"Shut it dudes, movie's almost on."
"And since Don cannot be trusted with the remote, I'll turn the volume down."
They watched as the screen appeared with the traditional 'A long time ago in a galaxy far far away…' and then they awaited the sonic boom.
But it looks like Don rigged the remote or something because the volume wouldn't turn down and he muttered, "Oh shit.."
They were all trying hard not to jump but they couldn't really control themselves if the speakers' right next to their ears. Raph'll have a blast breaking those up. Pun very much intended.
"Dudes! Han's FREE!"
"Yeah, we can see it Mikey."
"But why's he blind Don?"
"That's just the after effects of being frozen that long in carbonite. It will wear off soon."
…
"HEY LOOK! IT'S PRINCESS LEIA!"
"Wow. Sneaky…"
"She can be a ninja! Ninjas move stealthily and at times wear disguises like ours too right? Man, she'll be a great kunoichi!"
"But Mike, she hasn't shown any real athletic ability. and she prefers to use firearms than-"
"Quiet already! Or I'll tell Splinter!"
…
"That doesn't work that well when you're the one saying it Raph."
"JUST SHUT IT!"
"Dude…. Leia's soo.."
"SEXY!"
"Eww Raph! I meant to say beautiful! But… gotta admit that sexy's the right word too."
"I guess owning a slave's got its ups and downs."
"The ups are you can gaze at their sexy bodies all day long!"
"EWWW the both of you! That's so gross!"
"I'll tell Splinter!"
"Seriously Leo, that's getting old.."
"Okay, Luke's stupid. If he's gonna rescue Han, Leia, Chewbacca, 3PO and R2 from Jabba and his goons, WHY did he came all by himself?! No back-up or anything? I mean come on! That's the most idiotic thing he can even think of!"
"Not much of a good leader isn't he?"
"A good leader always plans things through and ahead of time, and is also not over-confident and arrogant in his skills. So… no, he's not."
"Geez Leo, I'm just saying.."
Minutes later…
"WHAT THE HELL?!"
"Luke has a twin?!"
"Specifically, a sister!"
"Ten bucks say it's Leia!"
Long pause.
"YAHOO! Hand over the money!"
"But we didn't bet on it!"
"Ugh, killjoys…"
"That sounds cool! Leia SKYWALKER. Ooh, I like the sound of that!"
"Awww…. That little koala teddy bear is so cute!"
"And dumb too."
"Hey! Why is it that every time I comment, you always shoot it down?"
*Shrugs* "It's become a habit."
"Look how Leia's handling the news…"
"Eww! And she just kissed Luke in movie 5! Isn't that pretty lesbian?"
"It's incest Mikey. And it will be if you think it is."
"Well how do you know that I think it is if you just think that I think it is and you're not sure?"
...
"I know that you think it is what I'm thinking that you think it is. What? Think that I can't think how you're thinking when you're thinking all these confusing sentences up?"
"Uuuuhhhh..."
"Hey quiet already! Can't a turtle watch this in peace?!"
"Man, that Evil Sith Lord's a mess! Look at all those wrinkles!"
"I really don't think he has the time to apply lotion Mike."
"Yeah. Because he's busy ruling the UNIVERSE! I suddenly wonder if Shredder's secretly a sith lord."
"Yeah right Mikey. And you know what, maybe the sword of Tengu's secretly a lightsaber too."
"Oh! And maybe he uses the Force to let the Foot do his bidding."
"You know, that's REALLY smart thinking all of you. Note the sarcasm."
"You really like to ruin the fun huh Don?"
"Yep, I'm the resident killjoy. Don't mind the real one who wears red over there."
"Ya talkin bout me brainiac?"
"No comment."
"WHY YO-!"
"Twenty flips for those of you who don't quit interrupting the movie!"
…
"Now that's better."
"TWENTY FLIPS LEO!"
"Don't turn to the dark side Luke! DON'T TURN!"
"You think he can hear you?!"
"No, but it's worth a try."
"I believe he won't Mikey. See, if he does, there will be no happy ending anymore."
"But Luke is Vader's son! Why can't he just repent and defeat Darth evil-sith-lord-with-wrinkles Sidious instead?"
"I'll tell you why. Because he's a coward. Done."
"No coward will stay and fight his own son!"
"No, a coward will stay and fight his own son."
"SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!"
"Leonardo! Is that you my son?!"
"Uh... n-no father!"
"Wow! Splinter Jr. lying to Splinter Sr.?! That ought to be a first!"
"Shut up Raph!"
"LOOK! Luke chopped his own father's hand off!"
"Just like Vader did in movie 5!"
"Okay, why do they LOVE cutting each other's parts off? Especially hands, but there's no FREAKIN blood?!"
"Because that would be too violent."
"And gory."
"Don't you guys know sarcasm when you hear it?"
"Oh, you were being sarcastic?"
"ARGH! I HATE YOU ALL!"
...
"GAH! LIGHTNING POWERS! THE SITH HAS LIGHTNING POWERS!"
"Where did the lightning come from?!"
"They create lightning using the Force. It's called 'Force Lightning.'"
"Catchy."
"Now THAT'S sarcasm!"
"VADER! DO SOMETHING! Your son is being electrocuted right before your eyes!"
Suspenseful minutes passed by..
"GO! GO! VADER! Throw that old guy off that hole!"
"That hole leads where exactly?"
"Who knows?"
"And who cares? At least the old guy's dead."
"Wait. What if he's NOT dead? What if that hole actually leads to an escape ship of some sort?"
"Then they're doomed."
"NOOOO!"
End of the movie.
Sad/happy music plays… (A/N: Can't really decide which is which. Mainly because they are all very happy and celebrating when the empire and siths are finally defeated. But I cried like a baby when I heard it and when I saw the ghosts of Obi-Wan, Yoda, and Vader/Anakin Skywalker as well.)
Mikey sniffed as he stared at his bros. "That was… pretty sad."
"Are you kidding?! What's so sad about that?!"
"Well… just when Vader finally got reunited with his son, that's the moment when the director chose for him to die. And he looked extremely old and miserable in that piece of junk suit! And when Luke cremated him…WAHHH!"
"It's alright Mike. Wait till you see the other one tomorrow!" Leo smiled as he patted Mikey's shell gently.
"You mean the prequels?" Mikey immediately brightened up. "What's it about?"
"It's about the story of Anakin, or Vader if you prefer. And what happened that made him change his ways."
"You know about it Don?"
"Nah, I just did a little research."
"So we get to see how he became an ass?"
"Raphael!"
"Oops?"
"But I wanna watch it now!" Mikey whined.
"Wait until tomorrow! We already wasted half our day with this marathon! Let Splinter watch his daily soaps."
"Leonardo's right my sons. It's my turn to, how do you boys say it? 'Hog' the TV." Splinter smiled as they all scrambled to clean up and get away from the TV before Splinter whacks their heads off. They all then headed straight to the kitchen as Mikey started to prepare dinner, barely catching Splinter's amused sentence:
"Is it really true that I am as wise as that Yoda character?"
AND that's finished! BUT! This is only part one. Part two with the prequels of Star Wars will come… I dunno? Next week? The week after that? A month after all that weeks? And the same system of writing will continue. And did you already guessed? If you still haven't, then here it is.. I ACTUALLY WROTE SPLINTER HERE! FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE EVER! tell me if I did him right even if he just appeared for not more than two lines. If you have any questions, especially those who doesn't know Star Wars that well or has totally not seen it, just PM me or whatever. And don't forget to review! :D And to the critics out there, tell me how I can improve on writing dialogue-only stories and tell me about your opinion in this chapter. Please, just constructive criticism. Thank you and have a nice nicey day. xD