I knock on the door to Roy's flat once, twice, three times before he answers.
I was kind of hoping it would be Carla, so I could tell her straight away because I can barley hold in what I now know.
Roy's dressed in a generic pair of blue pyjamas and has this look of panic on his face. I realise that it's rather late and that Roy was probably thinking that all sorts was wrong, that maybe there was an emergency or something.
Actually... do you know what? This is an emergency, Carla needs to know the truth about this fire and she needs to know it now.
"Hi Roy, I'm sorry to intrude like this but I need to speak to Carla." I say
"Peter it's almost midnight." Roy begins but I shake my head at him.
"Yeah... I'm aware of that but I still need to talk to her… it's about the fire and it's very important." Roy still looks annoyed but I reckon I've made it clear to him that I truly do need to speak to her.
He reluctantly lets me in and I follow him into his flat to see Carla sat on the sofa wrapped in a blanket. Her eyes are almost closed but when she sees me appear in the living room she sits upright.
I'd normally feel guilty for interrupting such a peaceful moment because she gets so few of them but I couldn't care less right now.
Hopefully after tonight she'll have a real chance a peace and serenity.
"Hey?" she breathes with a puzzled look on face.
I give her a relieved smile because I know what I'm about to tell her will change her life as she knows it right now, for good.
"Hi." I say and Carla smiles back at me for a quick second before she starts to wonder why on earth I'm here.
"I'll leave you two to it." Roy says as he goes into his bedroom and closes the door behind him. Carla watches him go to his room and the looks at me.
"What's going on?" She says getting up of the sofa and revealing the fact that she is wearing my shirt and a pair of black knickers.
Her toned legs are bare and so is her chest, the shirt is buttoned up but only to a point where it's made appropriate for her to be sat in front of Roy with.
It's a sight that under any other circumstance would excite me to no end but I am too worked up with what Tracy has done to even properly process the fact that Carla is stood in my shirt and almost nothing else.
"Peter...?"
"You might wanna sit back down." I say but Carla now looks worried, like I'm here with bad news instead of good.
"Alright… you're scaring me what is it?" She says as I take her by the hand and sit her down on Roy's sofa.
"Carla… I really don't know how to say this without shocking you so I'm just gonna come right out with it." I begin, Carla takes a deep breath and then I say it. "Carla you didn't start the fire."
She doesn't say anything.
She doesn't say anything for the longest time and when she does speak she says,
"Peter what are you talking about?" I move closer to her so that I can look right into those frightened eyes of hers and I say,
"You didn't start the fire Carla… it was Tracy."
"What?" Carla says and then she shakes her head. "No… She couldn't ave, Peter she wasn't even there that night."
"Carla!" I cry because I know she's going to start telling me that I've got it all wrong.
She'll say that I've "made a mistake." and that it was all her fault and I don't want her thinking that way for a second longer. "You didn't forget to blow out that candle… Tracy went into your flat and lit it again."
"What?" Carla says, "B… but why? Why would she do that?" She's shaking her head again, almost shaking the idea of the fire not being down to her, right out of her head.
"Because she's crazy." I say with a shrug. I didn't mean it to come out as casual as it did but it obviously annoys Carla because she tuts at me and says,
"Peter you've just sat there n told me that your sister started a fire in my flat n killed two people, so I'm gonna need a little more than she's crazy."
"She says she wanted to hurt you. She went into your flat, lit the candle n then saw a picture of Rob n changed her mind I guess." Carla eyes dart back and forth. I can tell that she is slowly trying to figure all of this out and that she slowly starting to believe what I am saying to her.
"So… what she just told you this?" Carla eventually says, she has tears in her eyes and her body is shaking. "She just… admitted this all to you because what…?"
"Amy caught her out… she was talking about where you left the candle and everything started to unravel. Me Dad was there he heard everything." I say as Carla stands up again.
I wonder what she's going to say as she paces back and forward in front of me and I make sure I try to ignore how good my shirt looks on her.
"So… let me get this straight…" Carla begins, breathing heavily and wiping a tear that has fallen down her cheek. "Your sister left that candle burning in my flat, my hard earned, beautiful flat and then when it started a fire and killed two people, she let me take the blame for it?"
"Yes." I say and I watch Carla for a second, she seems distraught, upset that Tracy could do such a thing but she's more angry than anything else. She is still breathing rigidly and then she opens her bedroom door and goes inside. "Carla..." I say but she doesn't answer me.
I stay sat on the sofa for a while and then she comes back out in a pair of jeans and killer boots. She still has my shirt on and she still has a furious look on her face.
"I'm gonna kill her." Carla says, I get right up this time... to stop her before she leaves the flat properly. "Peter move!"
"Carla… I think you need a while to just let this all sink in." I say but Carla is having none of this.
"Oh trust me Peter, it has sunk in and I am telling you that that woman is dead meat!"
"How is that going to help?" I say although I understand her fury.
I understand that she wants to lay in to Tracy because who wouldn't want to but I also understand that these past few weeks have been so difficult for Carla and that she needs more time to truly process everything that she has just heard.
"Oh it'll help alright! It'll help me big time." Carla says pushing past me, I take her by the arm which angers her even more because she shoves me hard. "Let go."
"No." I say still holding onto her arm although I really hate being even a little bit forceful with Carla, I hate having hold of her in anyway other than in a passionate one.
"I'm being serious Barlow you better let go of me or else." She says, rather intimidatingly I might add.
"Or else what?" I stammer and I move in front of the front door so that she can't get out.
Even though she is angry and even though she's had to put up a huge revaluation tonight, I suddenly see a flash of lust in Carla's eyes.
There's an undeniable tension between us and I can sense that Carla feels it too.
Especially as she licks her lips and smirks at me... I know exactly what she going to do next.
I'm not stupid, Carla has played me like this before, she's always been able to get what she wants out of me and as she leans forward and to kiss me roughly on the lips, I know that she's only trying to distract me for a moment, she knows the right buttons to press and then she'll try and push me out of the way and leave.
I know all this but I still let her lips touch mine for a moment.
I let her tongue slide into my mouth and as the kiss intensifies, I let her bite down on my bottom lip. I wait for her to try and push me out the way but it doesn't come as quickly as I thought it would.
We kiss for a couple of moments more but it's not much longer before I feel her try to pull me away from the door.
"It's not gonna work." I grin with Carla's lips still on mine. She pulls away from me and rolls her beautiful eyes.
I wish we could have kept on kissing like that but I knew exactly what she was doing and even though Tracy deserves everything that is coming, there is no way I'm going to let Carla go and beat the shit out of her.
"Can't blame a girl for trying eh?" she sighs, "Move Peter!" she shouts and she does this just Roy comes out of his bedroom.
"What's going on?" He asks, he's looking at me wondering what I've said to make such a peaceful Carla turn into this fuming one that is standing with her fists clenched and her eyes wide.
"Peter ere has just informed me that his spiteful little sister was the one who caused the fire in my flat and I was just on my way to give her one hell of a smack." Carla says bluntly. Roy swallows and then shakes his head,
"I… I really don't think that's a good idea." He says nervously because he can see how angry Carla is and we both know how an angry Carla is not one to be messed with.
"Well I'm sorry but I ave to disagree there, I think it's a pretty damn good idea to be honest with ya." She says but her face softens when she looks at Roy properly.
When she sees how much he doesn't want her to leave in such an angry state of mind.
"Carla believe me, no one wants Tracy to get her comeuppance more than I do but it's the middle of the night. Me Dad is there and so is Amy… think about how she will react if you go in there, all guns blazing. She doesn't deserve this, any of this." I say. I think I've gotten through to Carla because she sighs, goes to sit back down on the sofa and then buries her face in her hands.
"So… Tracy started the fire?" Roy says, looking at me with a gaze full of questions.
"Yeah." I say backing away from the door that Carla had been so desperate to get out of.
I look at her and she is softly sobbing into her hands. "Carla…" I say sitting down, "Carla look at me."
"How could she Peter?" she says looking up, tears falling down her face, onto my shirt and onto her hands. "How could she sleep at night knowing that she killed two people?"
"I don't know Carla… I honestly don't know and we can sit ere n try to figure it all out but the important thing here is that this fire… had absolutely nothing to do with you." I say wiping her face and smiling at her.
"Are you going to inform the police?" Roy asks, and I nod. "Good… Tracy has gone too far this time." he says with a returning nod.
"The police aren't going to do anything." Carla says shaking her head at Roy, and me "There's no evidence that it was Tracy... she'll get away with it."
"Yeah well I don't care what the police do, First thing tomorrow I'm going to go around that street and tell every single soul what Tracy did, there is no way I'm going to let everyone blame you for it."
"And what does Tracy think about this idea of yours?" Carla asks me, her eyes are still teary but she's calmed down now, she's not as enraged as she was before.
"Who knows…." I shrug.
"She'll probably deny it." Carla says, "She'll probably say that you're lying."
"Well she can deny it all she likes but when it comes down to believing me Dad or her... I think people will know who's telling the truth."
"Yeah but Tracy is your Dad's daughter Peter… He's not going to go around the street bad mouthing her is he?" Carla says rubbing her head, I can see her mind working in overdrive, I can see her imagining everyone not believing me and still blaming her for the fire and I hate it, I hate it with a passion.
"Carla… my Dad knows the difference between right and wrong. Daughter or no daughter he will tell people the truth." I say. I move closer to her and I take her hand. "I promise you, today was the last day that you get blamed for that fire."
Carla nods as if she really believes what I am saying and it's only when I put my arms around her that I notice that Roy must have creeped back into his bedroom.
"I still want to beat seven shades out of your sister though." Carla says quietly.
"Yeah well you can do that in the morning." I say hoping that she would have calmed down by then.
I'm not expecting her not to have it out with Tracy but I know that if she waits until morning, that some of the anger that she feels towards Tracy might have thawed out by then… Well I hope so anyway.
Carla stays in my arms for a while, longer than a while actually because the next time I look at my watch it's almost one am.
"I feel… weird." Carla says,
"Weird?" I say pulling away from her and watching her.
"Yeah weird… It's like I feel different somehow, like something is missing." Carla says looking slightly confused.
"That'll be the guilt, slowly making its way out of your system." I say, tucking some hair behind Carla's ear. She raises an unconvinced eyebrow at me and tilts her head slightly. "Well what else could it be?" I ask and then Carla shrugs.
"I guess you're right… I mean I've lived with it for so long that now it's gone… I feel really bizarre." She says quietly. "I feel like I'm not supposed to be happy or something."
"Well you can stop that right now… you of all people deserve happiness Carla, you have been through hell and back and now you know the truth, you can get your life back on track." Carla nods and looks down at our hands, which have somewhere along the line become entwined with each other's.
"Ave I even said Thank you?" She asks,
"For what?"
"For… everything. For coming ere n giving me the scan photo, for making me realise the fire wasn't my fault. For genuinely saving me... saving me like you always do" Carla says looking up at me now instead of our hands.
"You don't need to say Thank you..." I say weakly because her words have almost moved me to tears. "because coming back ere was something that I just had to do… for myself as well as for you."
I can't believe how nervous I was about it.
I can't believe I almost considered turning back because these past two days have meant to world to me.
They have been an emotional roller coaster, one that I wasn't sure that Carla and me would have made it through in one piece but as we sit together on Roy Cropper's sofa, I know that Carla and me are going to be alright.
I'm still not sure that she'll ever take me back, hell I'm still not sure if I even want her to do that to her self again, as it would probably be a huge risk but I know that we will always have this spectacular bond and that is something we can hold on to... even if we don't get back together again.
"Honestly Peter... I don't know what I would ave done if you hadn't of come back..." She says, fiddling with one of my fingers as she speaks but as she gets to the end her voice cracks slightly,
"What is it?" I say as she sniffs hard.
"Nothing…" she says but I know there's something.
"No go on." I plead. Carla hesitates and then says,
"I just don't want you to think that because I'm on the mend that you… ave to leave. I still need you around Peter."
"Good..." I smile "because I'm not going anywhere." I say, then I lean forward and as I kiss her gently on the head, she smiles.
She doesn't think I see it but I do.
It truly is one of the most beautiful smiles that I've ever seen in my rather ridiculous life and before I know it Carla moves her head and kisses me again.
Softly. Tenderly this time and I know that she means it.
It's not a game or a distraction or a ploy…
It's just Carla and she is kissing me so endearingly that there is no way I am ever going anywhere, ever again.