Log Entry: SOL 50

I have made contact with people!

Well not exactly people...lets just say they aren't of the human species. When we had first made contact I was ecstatic and how can I not be, I was talking to fucking aliens! Now it can get a bit annoying. The literally will not shut the fuck up. Every five minutes it's a new message telling me how to use my own inventions.

What would really be nice is if they told me how to use the strange shit from other planets that have been dumped here.

I'll have to deal with all this nonsense chatter since I'm sure Stanley isn't doing anything to save me. I don't care if I'll spend the rest of my life chilling with some aliens as long as I'm off this damn planet. Plus I think it would be pretty cool to explore the galaxy. Oh I could make another journal all about everything outside of Earth!

So let me shed some clarity on how I came into contact with these aliens.

I believe it was around SOL 46 or 47 when I decided it was time to mess around with the extraterrestrial items that I had. I'm going to be honest here, it was a complete mistake that led to me activating some contact device. I had found something that reminded me of the space craft back home (you know the one under Gravity Falls) and decided to mess with it by pressing random buttons when all of a sudden it started to glow. Next thing I knew I was being blown away as a hologram screen appeared. From there on out it was a huge game of charades until I finally understood how to fix the translator on the device.

Those science fiction books are wrong, Aliens do not magically know the English language.

In other news I harvested my potatoes. I have food now!

I'm thankful the aliens have no idea how to grow potatoes. I bet you they would try to control how I do that too.

Log Entry: SOL 52

I'm fucked.

Fuck the aliens. Fuck this planet. Fuck you all. Fuck everything.

Most of all fuck Stanley and Squishy.

None of this shit would have happened if Squishy didn't decide to be a total dick and mess with the fuel tanks.

Remember how I said those tanks were very explosive. Yeah well Squishy wasn't listening and knocked them all over causing an explosion.

Currently I'm hiding in the tiny pop out tent piece that's away from the explosion mess. Hopefully the communication device is alright but I'll check that when I believe it's safe to go outside.

My potatoes though, I hadn't finished transferring them to the storage unit I had built. Oh gosh I'm praying my crops aren't dead.

Right now I'm going to relax and think of a way to fix all of this.