This chapter is super-short because it's original intention was for it to be a filler chapter. And then I was like there needs to be a moment between Lily and Sander before there's a filer or I'll die of sadness. I'm being dramatic but I hope this update was worth reading, it's also pretty fast-paced as my sis likes to say because I have a French and History test that I need to study for. I realized this when I was in the middle of writing this chapter.
So probably while reading this I'll be reading the French alphabet outloud and pronouncing it horribly, haha. XD Such a loser.
But happy reading, oh, and follows/favorites/reviews make me happy!
"So he really got Beaters position," Tsubaki said the following evening in the joint-common room the four houses shared for inter-mingling. Tsubaki, Lucy and Lily were seated on the plush brown sofas relishing the warmth the fire gave them. Although it was almost the middle of September, the fireplaces were on and was providing them heat.
"Yeah, something like that," replied Lily absentmindedly.
"He must be really good," Lucy chimed in, "maybe, your love story won't be so tragic after all!"
Tsubaki glared at Lucy and she immediately shut her mouth. Tsubaki had quickly informed Lucy of what had happened between Lily and Lysander on the train but not enough to make her deem Lily's love story as tragic.
"Honestly, Lucy, use your brain. If Lily and Scamander are on the same team, far less the same position they'll rip each other's heads out!"
"Can we stop talking about, Scamander? Both of you are already giving me headaches with all your useless bickering," Lily said. She got up from the couch and dragged her stuff to a table, where she pulled out her Care of Magical Creatures textbook and started reading the assigned passage on living fungus.
As if they got the message, Tsubaki and Lucy trailed behind her and also pulled out their homework. Since they both were taking two classes less than her their workload was not as tremendous as hers. Tsubaki and Lucy both agreed that Lily balancing so much classes with Quidditch practice was impossible. But they didn't understand that while Lily had felt the brunt of her actions last year, she wasn't going to let the amount of N.E.W.T. lessons she was taking stop her from being on the Quidditch team. She'd done it once before, so why couldn't she do it again?
After about an hour passed Lucy was the one to break the overbearing silence, "Lily, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, 'kay?"
"You meant every word of it, Lucy," she snapped.
"Fine, you're right. It was selfish of me to say something like that to you but I'm not completely going to give up on hope on you and Lysander," Lucy said.
Those memories. The ones Lily had kept on telling herself didn't matter anymore. But they did. And the gnawing question of, what happened? Did too. In any way Lily tried to look at her past, Lysander had been right beside her, even before Tsubaki. She had to let go her whole past just to let Lysander go, and she couldn't do that.
"Lucy, that's enough." Tsubaki said tersely.
"No, aren't you curious, Lily?"
"Not the slightest, Lucy, that's why I'm currently wasting my brain cells thinking of ways to shut you up without sending you to Madame Pomfrey's, while trying to find ways to communicate with that jerk if he is selected as Beater. Because, um, I don't know, maybe I tried asking him and he flat out told me that those memories of us being kids means nothing to him," Lily sarcastically responded.
"He… he said that?" Lucy asked, she looked completely stunned.
Lucy sat back down in her seat and her fists curled into the fabric of her skirt. Tsubaki and Lily watched her but didn't say anything, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that, I'm really sorry."
Lily got up from her seat and tapped her cousin on the head. "You're forgiven."
She was beginning to walk away when she heard Lucy murmur, "He sounds like he's broken."
Broken, yeah, definitely broken.
oOo
The next day had conveniently been Saturday and the first trip to Hogsmeade. Since petitioning for more Hogsmeade days served as the basis for most discussions for the Prefects, Head Boy and Head Girl, it had gotten passed in an attempt to raise interest in studies. And so far it was working.
Well for everyone, except Lily.
She'd forgotten to check the notice board again and when she woke up at close to eleven the next morning, Tsubaki had left her a note saying that she'd be going to Three Broomsticks with Lucy and the boys. Instead of feeling hurt, Lily merely shrugged and pulled on decent clothes and rushed to the dining hall so she wouldn't miss breakfast. Tsubaki knew that Lily had a bunch of homework to do and going to Three Broomsticks would tie her up.
On her way back she passed some first years who shyly introduced themselves and stumbled away. Lily smiled to herself, almost every year on Valentines Day she received something with Chocolate Frogs or Pumpkin Pasties from admirers. It was all thanks to her last name.
She remembered a scandal that had broken out on Witch Weekly about an update on LILY POTTER'S TIME AT HOGWARTS: SPECIAL EDITION. Rita Skeeter had been the writer and slandered her with noting how well she excelled with studies and how she was most likely going to be the Prefect, even though she ranked ninth in the whole year.
When she had bypassed every other female student in rankings in fourth year, due to the immense studying she engulfed herself in at the end of fourth year, by fifth, they announced Allyne Dawson as Prefect. And she was now the current Head Girl.
In her room, Lily tried to get the remaining homework she had left f r that day done but the task was proven difficult as to the little space she had on her four poster. She eventually gave up and made her way down to the common room, homework forgotten, she carried with her, aaHistory textbook and some Chocolate Frogs. She couldn't stop thinking about Lucy's words from the previous night.
He sounds broken.
The common room was empty and she surmised that everyone had gone to the library, dining hall or had made a last minute trip to Hogsmeade. Unlike many of the other Visiting Days they had this one was an all-day outing, meaning curfew for fifth years and above was at eleven-thirty and nine-thirty for the underclassmen. She was about to sit on one of the couches when she caught sight of a familiar face lounging on one of the couches.
Her eyes widened in surprise and Lily was about to head the other way when she heard Lysander speak, "I was just leaving, Potter."
He sounds broken.
"You can stay, Scamander," she replied. She honestly didn't have it in her to get mad at Lysander after the confrontation with Lucy yesterday and the pile of homework she was procrastinating on. She'd pushed aside her homework for last minute, something she knew she was going to deeply regret.
"Look, Scamander, I'm honestly not in the mood to argue with you, I just want to read," she said when Lysander stood up. To prove her point, Lily walked to a single chair, curled up and opened her History textbook to where she left off with reading. Much to her delight, Lysander sat down and went back to jamming whatever music he was listening to. He was also reading a book.
With every second that went by Lily caught herself reading a passage, grasping the information and then letting it go every time she peeked at Lysander from her book. He was remarkable, like one of those Greek statues Lily had read about in the Grecian times. The way he lay down, holding his book and crossed his legs was alluring.
And once again, she was distracted.
Sighing, she took one of her chocolate frogs from her pocket and unpeeled it and tossed the chocolate in her mouth. She read her card, some Horris Magner appeared for inventing charmed quills that wrote down what your mind thought. She made a note to get one of those.
Lily glanced back at Lysander and pulled out a chocolate frog. The worse he could do was refuse the chocolate frog, smirk at her and say some witty rejection. She didn't think much of it, but a gesture like this was the most awkward thing she could do. He did deliberately take the last chocolate frog or that was what Lily had surmised from when he'd told her "the chocolate frogs are sold out."
"Here," she dropped the chocolate frog on his chest.
"You're giving me a chocolate frog, Potter?" he asked dubiously.
"That's an outstanding observation, Scamander," she replied coolly.
"I don't want it," he tossed it back to her, and went back to reading. Lily who was slightly shocked but mostly annoyed by his rudeness impulsively grappled the book out of his hands and tossed it to the couch but it landed on the floor.
"It was getting good." He said uncharacteristically.
He sounds broken.
And she couldn't handle it anymore.
"Stop doing whatever you're doing, already, Sander. If you're acting like this because of something I did in the past than I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry?" he gave a mirthless laugh, "that's what humans say even if they're not sorry. So what's the point of saying useless things like that if it has no real meaning?"
Lily was could've easily refuted him but all she said in that dazed-moment was, "You changed so much."
"So did you."
"Out of all things you had to turn into it had to be a cold-hearted bastard, I'd be satisfied if you turned into a hippogriff, because at least it could be restored with magic," she said, her eyes were suddenly teary.
"Stop searching for things that don't exist, Potter, it's a rather unattractive feature," Lysander said steadily.
"I would if someone knew that hiding behind walls is just as unattractive as trying to break them down," the perseverance in her tone emitted into the room and thickened the atmosphere. And for the first time in a very long time, she saw something like emotion in Lysander's eyes. And then as fast as it appeared, it disappeared.
"Are you possibly doing this because you're still in love with me, Potter?"
The question hit her with such force that she took a step back, literally. Was she? And had he known all this time that she'd been in love with him up until first year when she'd buried those feelings deep inside, she forced herself to forget him.
But had she really let go?
oOo
Next update will be October 1st