A/N: At last, it has returned. So sorry to all of my loyal readers for the ridiculously long break between updates. I hope to begin posting much more frequently again because I have been re-inspired to see this fanfiction through. This chapter came out in a completely different way than I expected, but I think that the opinions Aang expresses would accurately reflect the free-spirited culture of the Air Nomads, and the attitudes of the boys come from living in a society that prioritizes marriage above all else because of a need for as many children as possible to grow up and become soldiers. On Ji reflected this marriage expectation in her own thoughts earlier on. Next chapter is the dance party! Enjoy!
Xinlang and his friends paced around "their" little alcove tucked away in the forest outside of town, waiting anxiously for Kuzon's arrival. This was not a situation they could take lightly. Coming out here in the first place was always a risk in case they were followed, but today their endeavors were particularly foolhardy. They were actually going to learn how to play music to which people could dance. Dancing! Xinlang trembled with anxiety and excitement. He felt like a naughty child, doing something right under the nose of authority figures that would make them shudder. Such sentiments were familiar for the tall musician. He was generally a very well-liked and exemplary young man, making excellent marks in his classes, showing talent in his firebending training, and gathering a plethora of female admirers. His parents had told him from a young age that he was destined for a great military career.
However, Xinlang had never truly enjoyed fighting. He wasn't like that bully Hide. From the very first time he picked up a mandolin in class, Xinlang had been desperately hiding his passion for music from his parents. He knew they would never understand that he wanted to play music for the rest of his life. There were words for boys who pursued the arts and disliked violence. Xinlang had heard them in the hallways, and in his nightmares. Sometimes, he felt like he had so many questions and fears and anger and loneliness bubbling up inside him that he was about to explode. Oftentimes, music was the only way he could let himself defuse without losing every shred of composure. He had discovered from a young age that in order for music to be a form of self-expression, it had to come from within himself. He had started hiding in the woods and playing his own tunes around age ten, telling his parents he had special tutoring lessons after school to ensure the best grades possible. It was a good thing that Xinlang easily got the grades on his own, and that his parents completely believed that the "tutoring" was responsible. The ruse had worked for over three years now.
A few months into his secret music sessions, he had been followed and confronted by five other guys in his classes, who had intended on ratting him out for whatever he was doing. They were Hide's crowd, and Xinlang thought his life was over. However, when they discovered his musical liberation, they miraculously decided to join him. All this time later, Xinlang sometimes still could not believe his double life. At school, the other five boys never interacted with him, maintaining their positions in Hide's jock posse. Yet out in the woods, their voices and notes blended together in a harmony of companionship and trust that could not be broken. Away from any judging eyes, these young men revealed the parts of themselves made of softness, sensitivity, and compassion. Xinlang considered his fellow musicians to be his best friends.
Yet the danger of discovery never left their consciousness whenever they played, attuned to every rustling leaf or crackling twig that might indicate a witness's presence. This paranoia gave way to inspiration. Listening so carefully to the sound of nature around them for security had caused them to understand the innate music of the natural sounds of the forest. Alas, so they played, harmonizing with the wind and the trees and the calls of animals. Their daily lives were filled with discord, enmity, steel, flames, and rigid discipline. Composing ballads and songs amidst the dirt and trees and sky almost seemed like a dream at times, so very different from the harsh reality of the world they knew.
Xinlang was shaken from his thoughts by a slightly unfamiliar voice.
"Hey guys! Nice secret hideout you've got here."
All five boys jumped in shock. Kuzon was standing there in his trademark headband with a cheeky grin on his face. None of them had heard him enter the clearing. Impossible. Xinlang addressed him incredulously.
"Kuzon! How… did you get in here without us hearing you? And are you absolutely sure you weren't followed?"
Kuzon gave the proper Fire Nation bow of respect. "Don't worry. I can be pretty sneaky when I want to be, and I have plenty of experience avoiding people who are looking for me. We're safe. I promise. Now, let's get started. I've been thinking about it all day, and I've come up with a totally hot name for your group. You guys are… the Flameos!"
One of the other boys, Qingzuo, gave Kuzon a strange look. "Where'd you get that name? It seems kind of… queer."
Xinlang winced, but didn't say anything.
Kuzon looked puzzled. "Queer? What's that mean?"
Another group member rolled his eyes. "Really? What rock did you crawl out from under, Kuzon? Hide's father told him all about it. Queers are weirdo girly boys who like to kiss other boys. They don't know how to fight, and they don't get married and bear children like they're supposed to. Our group can't have a name that makes us sound like we're like that."
Kuzon looked completely confused. "Huh? I don't understand what you're talking about. Lots of boys kiss other boys. In my temp- I mean, village—people lived segregated by gender. Some people traveled and had kids, but others just stayed with each other. Everyone should be free to love whoever they want. It doesn't matter at all. Come on, hotmen. The Flameos is an awesome name!"
Qingzuo turned bright red and everyone else looked shocked and angry. "Don't call us that! We're not hotmen, and you better watch your mouth! But I bet you're one, aren't you? Xinlang, why'd you bring this colonial freak here? Maybe Hide was right. He's trouble."
Xinlang could not say a word. He was terrified that all of his friends were about to abandon him. Thanks to Kuzon. What on earth was that kid talking about, with his old village. Was there really a place where queers weren't "queers"? Where hotmen could be together and just be seen as men? Where these kinds of questions weren't dark and lonely and confusing and shameful? And was Kuzon really one of them? He was rather strange, and he was really good at drawing, and he liked to dance… but wasn't Kuzon also supposed to be some kind of prodigy non-bending fighter? And didn't he get into a fight with Hide yesterday for chatting with On Ji? Hmm… there was just no pinning this kid down.
Kuzon crossed his arms. "I think you're all being really awful right now. Hide's dad, Admiral Zhao, is a jerk with no self-control. Like father, like son. Don't listen to them. Is hotmen really a word for men who kiss men? I didn't know. But even if I did, why is that an insult? I'm not insulted by it. I'm in love with my forever girl. That doesn't mean I'm gonna be a jerk to people who are different from me. There are a lot of things I've seen in the Homeland that need to change. And this attitude is one of them. Starting right here. You there- kiss Xinlang on the cheek and give him a hug, right now."
Kuzon was pointing at Qingzuo, whose face was so red that he looked like he had swallowed an entire container of Fire Flakes in one go. "Don't talk about Hide like that. And are you crazy? No way."
Kuzon frowned. "Come on. If you don't do it, I'll tell the headmaster all about your music group. I don't want to do that, considering that you've got your first real gig tonight, and not having you there would ruin the whole party, so please don't make me. See? It's simple."
Without preamble, Kuzon stepped forward, grabbed Qingzuo, kissed his cheek, and hugged him, before stepping back to the complete astonishment of the group. Kuzon smiled. "That's it. I dare all of you to do that right now. There's nothing wrong with it, and you're gonna learn that. Besides, you guys like rebelling with your music, right? Out here, your songs are all about free self-expression. So's this. Maybe some of you like girls, and maybe some like boys. Either way, the least you can do is let everyone be free to be themselves."
Slowly, silently, all of the boys began awkwardly giving each other hugs and cheek kisses. At one point, there was an outbreak of nervous laughter to defuse the tension. When Qingzuo finally got around to embracing Xinlang, the mandolin player thought he was dying. Feeling Qingzuo's nervous lips gently brushing over his cheek made him feel warm all over, and his stomach was doing summersaults. Instinctively, he hugged back hard, looking up into Qingzuo's wide eyes and blushing face. Luckily, it didn't seem like any of the others had noticed their uncharacteristic exchange.
After a few minutes, the whole group dynamic was completely different. Everyone was much more relaxed, grinning partly out of nerves and partly out of amazement at what they'd just done, laughing sporadically.
"Wow. That was weird. But all right, I guess."
"Yeah. Imagine how angry our parents would get."
"Well, I still like girls, he he he."
"You're still really strange Kuzon, but it's actually kind of awesome. I guess we can be the Flameos. I don't think anyone's got any better ideas."
Kuzon eyed them all with a satisfied look on his face. "Great. Well now that that's taken care of, we can actually get to the music. Drummers, we're going to need some constant fast beats from all of you. Show me what you've got. The Flameos are gonna rock the cave tonight!"
