I don't own Naruto or anything affiliated with it.

Please enjoy!

Shylah's P.O.V.

"Exactly why do you feel the need to come in here almost every day?"

I looked up from the book I was currently reading through. "Because I need my alone time and your room is nicer than mine." Sasori frowned at me, and I smirked. "Hey, you guys shouldn't have gypped us and given us crappy rooms. I usually can't even sleep in mine, much less spend all day in there."

"Since when does holing yourself up in a room with someone else qualify as 'alone time'?" Sasori asked, turning to me fully as if he was preparing for some kind of verbal debate.

"Sometimes you go into your workshop thing with all your puppets, and then I'm actually alone. The rest of the times I just kind of ignore you, since you're usually so quiet." My eyes quickly flicked down to memorize the page number before I shut my book. "Why? I can leave if you find my presence so distasteful."

He stared at me for what seemed like a long time. "How long have you been coming in here?"

I knew he knew the answer (he was neither absent-minded nor forgetful), but I replied anyway. "Two and a half weeks, counting the days Tracey and Caitlin dragged me into refereeing for their sports games."

Reluctantly, he returned to his puppet. "You staying in here is a better alternative than whatever trouble you'd otherwise get into. Then I'd have to waste my time trying to fix whatever mess you'd made."

I rolled my eyes and reopened my book. "Can't believe you made me close my book for this…" I muttered. "…lost my place on my page…"

"I never told you to shut your book."

Once again, I found myself raising my eyes from the pages of my valued material to stare irritably at the red hair before me. "Oh, really? I'd thought you'd have preferred my undivided attention."

"As long as you reply to my questions in as intelligent a manner as someone like you is capable of, I couldn't care less how much you actually focus on me."

"Excuse me for being raised to actually pay attention to my elders when they're speaking to me," I replied dryly. "As young as you look, you still act like a temperamental old man."

"And you act like a brat putting up the façade of a mildly intellectual being." Sasori quipped tonelessly.

"Aw~! Did I hurt your feelings? Is that why you're resorting to insulting whatever IQ I may or may not have?" I queried sarcastically.

"Even if I had feelings for you to hurt, someone as senseless as you seem to be wouldn't even be able to come close to doing so." I held back a victory smirk when he looked up from his puppet to face me. Ha, take that! Have fun trying to remember what you were doing when you go back to making your puppet!

"Then you must not know me very well."

"That might have something to do with the fact that I don't want to know you very well."

I scoffed. "Please. You couldn't figure me out if you tried, whether it's because I'm that outrageously complex or you're just that dense. Betting money on you actually knowing me would be like tricking a small, naïve child into giving me their lunch money."

"You sound experienced in that area." Sasori looked at me with simultaneous curiosity and cold disinterest. What a contradictory person…

I shrugged. "I was one of those hulking, overbearing schoolyard bullies back in my day."

"Somehow, I find that difficult to believe. Are you sure you weren't one of the kids getting their money stolen?"

"Nope," I replied, shaking my head and popping the 'p' in 'nope'. "I have never gotten any of my money stolen. Even when I was younger I knew how to avoid the bullies of our school. Survival of the fittest, and all that." Glancing down at myself, I laughed self-deprecatingly. "Survival of the cleverest, in my case. Although I have lost weight since I came here." I blame the lack of good food, since I'm the only one who cooks.

"You seem unusually talkative today."

"I blame you."

"Of course. Everything I say just encourages you to continue, doesn't it?" I'm detecting sarcasm…

"It does, actually. I always have to have the last word. It's the burden I must bear in this world."

"Well, then, I suppose I should stop talking, shouldn't I?" He questioned rhetorically, returning to his puppet.

"You don't have to, since I have to go cook lunch," I assured him as I put down my book and made my way to the door. "But you might want to anyway, unless you want to be talking to nothing." Sasori remained silent as I left, either because he didn't want to encourage me to stay anymore or because he was following my advice.

The walk to the kitchen was short, and I arrived there in under a minute; as opposed to when I walked from where my room was located, which was so far away that it would take me well over a minute to get to the kitchen. I hated walking, so that was another reason to stay close to the kitchen. As I entered the kitchen, I came to a full stop. Today will have been exactly four weeks since I first started cooking. I'm free!

Both of my fists rose into the air in a victory fist-pump. "Sweet freedom!" I whirled around and came face-to-face with both Hidan and Tisha. Before they could open their mouths to bother me about food, I giggled and earned confused stares from two people who had never heard me do so. "I don't have to cook anymore! Find someone else to serve your food, or better yet do it yourselves! I'm outta here, suckers!" Cackling like a madwoman, I skipped to the living room.

Emi and Tiamat looked up from their books, while Kakuzu, the only other occupant of the room, chose to ignore me. Kisame was nowhere to be seen - not that uncommon anymore, since Tracey and Caitlin had introduced their sports to most of the Akatsuki. Emi's expression immediately went from a polite smile to a concerned frown, and Tiamat eyed me warily. "Are you feeling well, Shylah?"

I cut off another cackle halfway through, earning an even more concerned stare from Emi. "I'm better than okay. Yesterday was the last day I had to cook for you people. I'm no longer bound by the tyranny of the debt I owe to Kakuzu!"

Kakuzu looked up when he heard his name. "I see you've remembered that the agreement was only for three weeks. Damn, I was hoping you'd forget."

I pointed triumphantly at him. "I almost did!"

"That's not something you should readily admit to, Shylah," Tiamat half-scolded. After a few more seconds, she added, "You're still making me lunch."

"No, I'm not~!" I practically sang. "I'm not making another meal again, so you can just eat it, Tiamat!"

"There's one fatal flaw to that declaration," Tiamat pointed out while Kakuzu returned to his book and ignored us. "How are you going to eat if you don't make yourself any meals?"

As if conjured from my imagination, Mischa walked into the room with Tobi in tow. "Sis!" She called, running over to me and wrapping me in a hug. "Guess what? You don't have to cook anymore!"

I nodded enthusiastically while Tobi cheered in the background. "That's right! Hey, Sis, what were you going to make yourself for lunch today?"

"I was thinking that, since you've made me meals for the last two weeks, I could make you some food!" Mischa replied, oblivious to the triumphant smirk I sent to a now-irked Tiamat. "I was going to make some food for Tobi and I anyway, so what's one more person?"

"Aw~, Mischa-chan's so nice to Tobi!" Tobi gushed, rubbing his head and acting flattered. "Tobi can't wait to try Mischa-chan's food, especially if it's as good as the cookies you make."

"You helped me make those cookies, Tobi! Don't underestimate how big a help you were to me!" Mischa declared, a stubborn gleam entering her eyes. "And if you hadn't taken the shower head off my shower, I never would've known there was hard candy in there. I owe you."

I raised my eyebrows in Tobi's direction, and he returned to rubbing his head, this time sheepishly. "All Tobi did was trip into the shower. It was just luck, I guess."

"So what were you doing in my little sister's room?"

"Eh?"

I rolled my eyes. Okay, neither of them would actually do that - no matter how much my sister may or may not want to. Plus, I shouldn't look a gift-horse in the mouth. It's best to just be grateful Tobito decided to save my sister from a literally sticky situation. "Don't worry about it, Tobi. I trust you with my sister," I assured him, ignoring both Kakuzu's disbelieving half-laugh and my sister's happy exclamation.

"Yay! Mischa cheered before (finally) letting me go. "I'm gonna go make lunch for us, now!" She declared before running off to do just that. Tobi wandered off, muttering something about finding Deidara.

When I turned back to the living room, Tiamat was giving me a disbelieving stare. "You knew she'd be okay with cooking for you, didn't you?"

"Do you really think I'm capable of manipulating my little sister into making me food? … Don't answer that. I was actually just going to prevail upon Reia's motherly instincts to cook for all of us. Of course, now that I have my own meal secured, I'm not feeling so generous. You're all back to square one of fending for yourselves in the meal department." I shouldn't have left my book in Sasori's room; I'm feeling bored without a book in my hand…

"Tisha is probably whining to Reia as we speak," Tiamat predicted. "Reia will eventually agree and make enough for everyone to prevent her conscience from feeling bad for us. We don't have to worry."

Emi carefully set her own book on the coffee table and rose from the couch. "I think I'll make my own food, since I like cooking. It's a nice change from waiting for your meals to be made." She looked at me apologetically. "I-I didn't m-mean for it t-to sound like that…"

I raised a hand and waved off the implied apology. "I'm in too good a mood for it to matter, and I honestly don't care." Taking the seat Emi had previously occupied, I opened her book and began reading it.

"I'm not looking forward to hearing everyone complain about how there's no food," Tiamat muttered from beside me, putting down her own book and withdrawing a wallet from a pouch in the hem of her shirt. She'd gotten a job as an accountant for one of the more prosperous merchants in Ame, and was currently on lunch break.

"Don't you have to get back to work?" I muttered under my breath, focusing more on the pages in front of me than on what I said.

"That was rude, Shylah. Instead of asking if I have to get back to work, ask how long my lunch break is and show concern for my punctuality. Right now it just sounds like you want me to leave as soon as possible."

"And if I do?"

"You're not supposed to say that so openly. Be more polite."

"You sound like Reia," I pointed out, rolling my eyes.

"Reia has the right idea. Someone has to teach you manners, since your parents obviously did a terrible job in that respect."

"Yes, my dead dad did an awful job raising me when he only saw me for two days a month," I replied, my normally sarcastic voice gaining an edge to it. I really need to work on controlling my tone.

"…I didn't know."

Again, I rolled my eyes. "Gee, you don't have to apologize in such a horrified way. It's been a while, no big deal. I'm not bitter or anything."

"You're bitter," Kakuzu contradicted me without raising his eyes from his book. "You're bitter and looking for pity."

"Try to pity me and I'll spit on you," I shot back. "Just let me go peacefully back to wallowing in my bitterness and reading a book about some ninja named after a type of ramen." Who knew Emi would've found the book Jiraiya wrote that inspired Naruto's name?

Reia's P.O.V.

I glanced up from the plants I was tending (the cacti, which were Zetsu's favorites) when the door opened, surprised that Zetsu would use the door when he could simply use the Mayfly technique to phase through walls. Instead of Zetsu, however, Tish walked through the door. I sighed, internally mourning the loss of peace and quiet I'd been given as Hidan followed her into the greenhouse.

"Hi, you two," I greeted, rising to my feet. To prevent any casualties in either the plant life or new human presences, I began making my way cautiously to the door so that they wouldn't feel the need to venture any further into Zetsu's domain. "What brings you to the greenhouse?"

Tish opened her mouth to reply, but Hidan cut her off. "Make us some damn food." I narrowed my eyes, but couldn't detect any hints of real malice; it was almost like he was commenting on the weather, albeit in a louder tone than someone would normally use.

Glaring, Tish turned to Hidan and punched his arm. "Dude, you don't just order her to make you food! Fucking rude." Hidan hit Tish back, and soon they were fighting on the ground.

I should probably hurt them before they hurt the plants- I mean themselves. Yeah, I wouldn't want them to hurt themselves or each other, either… "I'll make food if you two stop fighting."

Both of them jumped apart like they'd been electrocuted with a cattle prod. Tish was still glaring at Hidan, and he had moved on from me in favor of returning her venomous stare. Still eyeing each other like the truce was only temporary, they slowly made their way to the door.

Suppressing an eye roll, I skirted around a few rows of plants to follow after them. "You two act like little kids with no self-restraint. Why hang out with each other so much if all you do is argue?" I set off for the kitchen, Tish and Hidan following at a slightly easier pace to keep up with my short legs.

"This bitch can't keep away from me. I know I'm sexy, but she can't keep her damn hands off me." It didn't take much imagination to know that the thud sounding from behind me was Hidan hitting the floor after Tish tripped him. "You little fucker!"

"Shit, Hidan, falling over yourself? Klutzes aren't very sexy, are they?" Tish laughed, dodging past me as Hidan surged to his feet. Hidan raced after her down the hall, pushing past me in the process.

After they'd both turned a corner, I stopped. I still wanted to return to the greenhouse, but I also knew that the amount of time I'd been spending in there over the past week and a half wasn't necessarily healthy. Plus, if I didn't cook lunch, Tish and Hidan would hunt me down and complain until I did. My stomach rumbled, and I made up my mind to get on with cooking lunch.

When I arrived in the kitchen, Mischa and Emi were already busy preparing their own lunches. "So I guess I don't have to worry about you two, then?"

Mischa looked up from what she was cooking (I didn't know what it was, but it smelled good). "Right! And I'm making some food for Tobi and Sis, so you don't have to make food for them either. Y'know, since Shylah's been making food for us since she got here." Something tells me Shylah planned this…

Emi, meanwhile, smiled sweetly at me. "I was actually going to make everyone food, since no one was in here when I arrived - other than Mischa, I mean. You can help me if you aren't too busy, but I can make everything by myself if you'd prefer."

I walked over to where Emi had set Shylah's cookbook on the counter. "Are you making sansai soba?" I asked, pointing to a picture. When she nodded, I got out a cutting board, knife, and some vegetables before preparing them to be added to the dish.

"Um, Mischa, why does Shylah dislike cooking so much?" Emi began, starting a conversation to make the time pass faster. "If you d-don't mind telling me, I m-mean."

"She's just lazy," Mischa replied before smiling at the food she was making. "Although she always says I'm better at cooking than she is, so I don't mind making a meal or two for her. It's kind of fun once you get into the groove of things." Emi and I nodded in agreement.

"Emi, Mischa, and Reia, future homemakers of America," Tiamat quipped from the doorway. She walked over to the fridge and opened it. "Don't mind me; my break will be over soon, so I'm just going to grab something and eat it on the way there."

"There are some leftover nikuman in the fridge from when Shylah tried making them yesterday," Emi informed her. "They're not really fresh anymore, but if you don't mind…"

Tiamat shrugged and grabbed two from the fridge. "Thanks. These are probably the best things Shylah's ever made, so I guess they won't be too difficult to eat…"

"Oi!" Mischa barked, waving her spoon threateningly at Tiamat. "Don't be dissin' my sister's cooking, y'hear?!"

"Calm down, Mischa. Even your sister acknowledges that she's a terrible cook. It's common knowledge. Besides, you wouldn't hit me with that, anyway." Nonetheless, Tiamat moved carefully out of Mischa's range before taking a bite of her nikuman and exiting the room.

"Yeah, you better run!" Mischa yelled after her, hopping towards the kitchen doorway and brandishing her wooden spoon like a rapier. "'S'what I thought!" She yelled before returning to whatever soup-like substance she was making.

Finally, we were all sitting around the table for our late lunch - all being everyone except for Pein, Konan, Zetsu, Tobi, Sasori, and Tiamat. As always, it was extremely crowded, and not even a little bit quiet. I was starting to miss Tiamat, since she was one of the only ones (aside from Kakuzu and myself) who even bothered trying to keeping Tish, Hidan, Deidara, and Caitlin from fighting. It didn't help that Kisame would sometimes add to the general chaos by any means necessary.

After a while, Deidara caught on to the fact that it was Kisame throwing food at him, and not Tish. Just as he was throwing some of his own noodles back at Kisame, Hidan threw his chopsticks. The noodles missed Kisame and ended up on Emi, instead.

"I'm sensing a pattern," Shylah muttered from where she sat beside me. "And Deidara always tends to be involved."

Kisame, meanwhile, had taken Tish's bowl of soba and tossed it at Deidara, only for Deidara to dodge and the soup to cover Caitlin, instead. "Oi, dip-shit, you owe me a bowl of noodles!" Tish yelled, stealing Kisame's bowl. Neither seemed to notice, since both of them were glaring at each other.

"Watch where you're aiming, yeah!" Deidara spat out.

"Aren't you supposed to be good with long-ranged weapons? How'd you manage to miss me and hit Emi?" Kisame retorted just as venomously.

"I didn't to it on purpose, un!"

"From my point of view, you're both equally to blame," Shylah added. "Kisame could've deflected the noodles from Emi, and there were ways Deidara could've prevented Caitlin from being hit by the noodles."

Shylah's words were lost when Caitlin lobbed Deidara's bowl at Kisame. Rather than dodge, he used a small water jutsu to swat the bowl away - and onto Hidan. From there, it devolved into a mess of thrown food, taijutsu, and ninjutsu.

I crawled under the table and reached the doorway just as the table was blown to smithereens by - guess who? - Deidara. Tracey and Emi huddled behind Shylah - which was interesting to see, since Tracey was several inches taller than Shylah. Tish had taken the opportunity the chaos offered to stab her chopsticks through each of Hidan's eyes. Emi looked ready to faint when she ran past us, an eye on each chopstick.

Shylah and I exchanged a look. "I'm not cleaning that up," she declared as Caitlin sidled over to us, watching the scene with abject horror.

"Oops?"

"Maybe we should get out of here," I suggested. Slowly, everyone nodded and exited the room.

In the living room, we stumbled upon Tish, who had placed Hidan's eyes on the coffee table and was poking them curiously. "Do you think he'll go blind if I keep messing with his eyes?"

"He technically is blind right now, Tisha," Shylah pointed out, voice dripping with sarcasm. She rolled her eyes and sat almost primly on the couch, opening up a book that appeared out of nowhere and beginning to read it. Mischa, who had disappeared at the start of the chaos, reappeared just as suddenly and sat next to her.

Caitlin approached Tish and Hidan's eyes with morbid curiosity in her eyes. "Can I poke them?" Tish motioned for her to go ahead, and so she did. "They're so squishy. Do you think he can see us with them?" Shylah snorted derisively, and Caitlin glared back at her. "It's totally possible!"

"Whatever," Shylah muttered, flipping a page in her book.

Zetsu poked his head into the room. "They finally snapped and started killing each other? I wonder what they'll taste like…"

I shook my head. "I think they're still alive, but they're probably going stir-crazy."

"They're to used to a more active lifestyle not to be.Leader-sama will probably start sending them on missions, again. Bye. Thank you for letting us know." I waved and smirked when they got into another argument as they walked away. So cute… funny… I don't even know anymore. This place is messing with my head.

Tobi poked his head in. "Why is everyone fighting in the dining room? Should we help?"

"Don't worry about it, Tobi-san. They're just blowing off some steam," Shylah replied nonchalantly. From beside her, Mischa held out her arms, and Tobi walked over to her.

"Mischa-chan, are you okay?"

"Hug me!" Mischa chirped, scooting over and patting the couch in the newly-opened space between the two sisters. "I'm needing a Tobi-Hug after seeing all that fighting. Your hugs could cure cancer, I'm sure."

Tobi laughed (once), and his laugh turned into a more childish giggle. "Okay, Mischa-chan. If Tobi's hugs cure cancer, your hugs cure… uh… everything else!" Tobi exclaimed before hopping onto the couch (causing a laughing Mischa and annoyed Shylah to bounce once) and hugging Mischa.

"Or depression," Shylah added, poking Tobi's back with a corner of her book. "Don't you think, Tobi-san?"

"Eh? Well, hugs make people happy, so of course Mischa-chan hugs could cure depression."

Tracey giggled. "Maybe Fire should give Itachi a hug."

"Who's hugging Itachi?" Kisame asked from the doorway, Itachi beside him.

Tracey's face reddened. "Ice said Fire's hugs could cure depression, so I thought maybe she should hug Itachi, 'cause… he's… so… stoic…" Tracey laughed nervously, glancing around. "Or maybe not." Suddenly, she brightened. "I could hug you!"

"Hn."

"I don't think that means no~" Tracey sang before skipping over to Itachi. She paused just as she was about to hug him and withdrew back towards the rest of us. "But that might not mean yes. Maybe later…"

After a few more minutes, I returned to the greenhouse. I smiled a little when I saw that Zetsu was there, and not anyone who would disturb the peace of the indoor garden (such as Hidan and Tish). I made my way around the garden, looking for any plants that still needed to be tended.

"Hey. Thank you for taking care of the garden while we were on a mission, Reia," both halves of Zetsu greeted me.

I nodded in acknowledgement of their greetings. "It was no problem. I like gardening."

"I'm surprised you learned how to tend them so quickly. Not that we didn't think you could do it, of course. I would've been less surprised if you couldn't. Did anything happen while we were gone? Does it really matter? Of course it does!"

"Hidan and Tish came in to ask me to make lunch. I had them leave before they could do any damage to the plants." Or each other. "And most of the members got into a fight while we were eating, as you know. How often have these kinds of fights broken out before we came here, anyway?"

"I think it's only happened once before you all came here. We spoke to Pein-sama, and he's decided that it's best to start sending them out again." Zetsu's white half snickered while his black half just smirked. "It's about time, too."

"Does that mean you'll be going out on spying missions more often, as well?" I asked, trying not to sound as disappointed as I felt. He - they were surprisingly good conversationalists, despite the fact that they usually stayed silent when they were here. When they did speak, they usually devolved into arguing with each other if I didn't give any input. Other than those two negative reasons, though, they were enjoyable to hang out with.

"Will you miss us?" White Zetsu teased while Black Zetsu frowned. "The length of time depends on the difficulty of the mission. Don't worry, we'll always come back to you. To Pein-sama, you mean. Can't you ever take a joke? Your jokes are never any good. Reia likes my jokes. No, she doesn't. Yes, she does. You're delusional. Fine, let's ask her."

Suddenly I was faced with their attention focused solely on me. Their gazes didn't waver, and they waited silently (expectantly) for my answer. There were a few times where this had occurred in the past - they would look to me to settle an argument -, and each time I tried maintaining neutrality. "I don't mind your jokes."

"See? She likes my jokes. Saying she doesn't mind them is saying that she tolerates them, not that she actually likes them. You're just a sore loser. And you're delusional, as I've said before."

I stifled a sigh. They seem to be in a more argumentative mood than usual. Well, this should be… entertaining, I guess…

Tiamat's P.O.V.

I stifled a groan as I looked through the business owner's financial reports over the years. I've been hired by an idiot! I complained in my mind as I looked out onto the streets of Ame. My father would never have let his business go like this. It's disgraceful.

Dragging my gaze from the people bustling by in the cold rain, I worked up the ambition to continue the long hours of tedious simple math that I could've done in my sleep. As a manager, supplier, and salesman, my new boss had originally seemed almost flawless. Unfortunately, his mental skills left much to be desired. Tedious tasks were the least of my problems; I'd been hired by a man with almost no financial background, whose money had essentially begun to disappear because of how bad he was at simple arithmetic!

Thus, I found myself the proud new recipient of a nice little corner office and years' worth of convoluted bank statements and business reports. Bad at math and possibly more disorganized than Tracey and Caitlin put together. It's a good thing I'm working for him and not dating him, because this is the exact opposite of what I deem to be acceptable qualities in a spouse. Not to mention he seems to enjoy spending much of his time at a nightclub in one of the shadier parts of Ame…

Eventually, I managed to return to a steady rhythm of financial problem-solving. Once I got into the 'groove' of things, it became a task I could execute with mindless precision; meaning that my mind was free to wander to other things.

Those nikuman were rather good. It's too bad Shylah's refusing to cook; she really was improving. With a little more practice, she could have been able to reach Reia or even Mischa's level of skill. Oh, well. She'll probably end up cooking for Mischa's birthday - which reminds me, Reia's birthday is coming up in about a month. I wonder if she'd appreciate any gifts from this world, assuming that we're not home by then.

The hours crawled by, until everyone's workday had ended and we were all preparing to go home. My boss - Matsushita-san - approached me, the rest of his employees in tow. "Kulkarni-san, we were going to go out for a drink and were wondering if you would accept an invitation to join."

Mid-nod, I quickly changed to a respectful bow. "Of course, Matsushita-san," I replied. His pronunciation of my family name was stilted, but that meant little in the way of tradition (which getting a drink with co-workers usually was). He was also polite, and while I would have preferred going home, one doesn't get ahead in the world - any world - without some proper networking. Plus, I really needed a drink after the day I'd had.

The bar was an unassuming building, open from morning to night, with loyal patrons all from the surrounding area. It was quaint and homey, if a little run-down, but welcoming all the same. We all took our own stools at the bar and our boss offered to buy the sake. After the few rounds of obligatory, polite denial, we finally accepted.

I sipped my personal cup of watery sake lightly, not wanting to get drunk while I was still technically under the legal drinking limit - at least, in America. Were I from almost anywhere else, I would've had no inhibitions about such things. Except for getting drunk around the boss; that was probably not beneficial to my career.

As it was, I had sat on the edge of the group, so the only person I was sitting next to was Kichimoto-san, a salesman of Matsushita-san's store. He turned to me and smiled politely. "How was your day today? Did you make any progress?"

"As much as can be expected. Thank you." Matsushita-san heard my reply and laughed sheepishly. He was fully-aware of his managerial failings - hence why he'd hired someone else to handle it. "That's not to say that I made no progress at all; I should be caught up by Friday."

"Really? We all thought it would take at least a month to get through all of that." The rest of my coworkers - and even my boss - gave me astonished looks before returning to their own conversations.

I waved off the implied compliment. "It's essentially what I was raised to be able to do. Really, you should see my father calculate logistics and project finances - that is what I'd call impressive."

From beside Kichimoto, Ito-san, another coworker, gave his own input and entered the conversation. "Where do you come from, anyway? From the way you speak of your father's company, he must be rather famous. The most prosperous city in the Land of Rain is Amegakure, and I've never heard of your family name."

"I'm from… overseas," I replied, my mind scrambling for and subsequently finding the excuse Shylah had told me to use to avoid suspicion for why we seemed so 'foreign'.

They both nodded, seeming to come up with their own explanations, and the conversation dropped there. I remained silent for the rest of the hour, then politely informed them that I would be missed soon and went on my way.

The rain was cool, as opposed to the heated drops of the late afternoon. It helped to clear my head through the muddle of sake-induced fog and think more clearly. Okay, maybe it didn't help me think, but it cleared me up enough to keep me walking in a straight line.

Someone nudged me with their elbow and I stumbled to the side. So much for walking in a straight line… I glanced up to see Caitlin looking at me with surprise. "Sorry, Tiamat, I guess I bumped you harder than I thought. What're you doing out so late?"

I waved off her apology and started walking beside her. "I'm going home after hanging out with my boss and coworkers at some random bar by the store. You?"

"I'm just coming back from Nakano-san's house." I nodded, remembering the elderly woman Caitlin had begun hanging out with a week ago. Secretly, I thought she only hung out with her because she was reminded of her grandmother. "Nakano's son died yesterday, and she asked me to accompany her, her grandson, and her daughter-in-law to her funeral in two days."

"You're not quite that close to the family yet, are you?"

Caitlin shrugged. "She doesn't want to distract her son's family from mourning by making them attend to her, so I'm going to act as her official escort to give them some peace of mind. I met them today, and the daughter-in-law seemed relieved that she won't have to take care of her." Temper flashed in Caitlin's eyes as she thought about it. "Even her grandson didn't seem to want to have anything to do with her."

I nodded, only half-listening as Caitlin began to rant indignantly. Were that Jeddah, she wouldn't have allowed my mother or me to simply foist her off on someone else - especially someone our family barely knew. Not that I would have wanted or dared trying to do so. I love Jeddah, even if she is a little old-fashioned.

I was brought out of my inner musings when I tripped over the doorframe leading into the Akatsuki base and fell flat on my face. "Damn."

"Are you drunk?"

"No~!" I struggled to get off the floor.

"Kakuzu, help Tiamat; she's drunk."

"Will you pay me?"

"No?"

"Then no."

"Nik nefsik!" I yelled after him.

He stopped and turned back to me questioningly. "What?"

Not heeding the warnings of Jeddah not to swear in any language, I replied heatedly, "Go fuck yourself!"

Kakuzu shook his head while Caitlin fell to the ground laughing. "You have a swearing problem when you're drunk."

"Tabban lak, sharmouta. Help me up!"

He sighed. "I don't want to know what you said," he muttered irritably before picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. "I expect you to pay me for helping you."

"Enta mossa zebb bila fluse!"

Sansai Soba - hot soup made of buckwheat flour noodles and named for the sansai (wild vegetables) cooked and placed on the top

Nikuman - pork buns, typically the bun-shaped food-stuff you'll occasionally seen eaten in some high school anime

Jeddah - the Anglican rough translation of 'Grandmother' in standard Arabic

Nik Nefsik - a rough translation of 'Fuck yourself' in Arabic

Tabban Lak - 'Fuck you'

Sharmouta - 'Whore'

Enta Mossa Zebb Bila Fluse - should mean 'You suck dick for free'; an insult specifically tailored to Kakuzu

Yay, I managed to post this on Saturday! I actually did research on Japanese foods and Arabic swear words for this, but let me know if I've been misinformed. Tiamat got drunk pretty quickly because she's tiny (it takes less alcohol to raise her blood-content) and she's never had alcohol before (she doesn't really know her limit). I just felt like it needed some humor (Tiamat's a pretty serious person), and I needed an excuse to write Kakuzu in.

I had two things to ask you guys, but I forgot one, so moving on!

How do you guys feel about lemons/limes? Do you think they're necessary and would prefer them in this story, would you rather not see them, or do you not care either way? If I do write them, I'll have to change the rating. Whether or not you want me to write that stuff, I might not because I tried writing a practice one and it felt so~ awkward. But your input might sway me one way or the other.

In other news, I'm sick T-T Oh, well; I'll live. Have a nice week! See you soonmaybeeventuallypossiblynotreallybecauseIdon'tactuallyknowyouinreallifeIpromiseI'mnotstalkingyou. Eheh...