Uhhh I deleted Victims' Memoirs becuz I honestly had no idea what to do with the next chapter

and yea its about time i released a new chapter aint it?

well here it goes...

And check out my other fic 'A 'Stuffed' Week'! It's less serious than this story (more cute i guess) and fluff.. yea (its Ayumi X Yoshiki hue)

Hope you enjoy this chapter! This chapter is gonna be.. sweeter than the other three. Heheh.

Yoshiki couldn't believe what he had done. He tried to get it out of his head but he couldn't. He felt heat on his face every time he thought about it.

"God dammit!" He growled, punching the wall. 'Ugh! Why in the world did I do that? She must think I'm a perv or something...'

"I'd better stay away from her... I don't want to do more weird things.."

Ayumi and Yoshiki almost kissed in that apartment. He didn't realize it was a part of himself that still remembered Ayumi. Instead, he thought he tried to flirt with a pretty girl instinctively. Yoshiki felt so embarrassed that he left right away without saying goodbye.

"Hey bro, you okay?" Miki asked, concerned.

"H-huh? Of course! Ye-yea..."

"Why are you stammering so much?"

"I-I'm not. If you have no business with me, leave me alone!"

"Okay, fine... You don't really have to yell at me ya know. It seems like you are covering something up more."

"Leave me be!" He yelled, panicked.

Miki smirked, giving a teasing face and left the room.

Yoshiki took a deep breath. 'She's not gonna let go of this... Arg, I'm so stupid!' Than a text message came.

It was her.

'Hey, Yoshiki, why did you run off like that? Is something wrong?'

'Why is she acting so casually?' He thought.

'No, no... I'm busy, that's all. Sorry for just running off like that. I won't be able to reply back since I'm busy. Bye.'

Ayumi was also flustered. She couldn't keep thinking about the moment.

"Heheheh.."

She was dreaming the moment. Her heart was pounding and she was blushing.

'Yoshiki can be so romantic sometimes... Why did I never notice in the past? I hate my past self...'

She saddened when she remembered the past, but soon got over it by thinking about the incident again. She took out her phone and started texting Yoshiki. She was getting nervous about this.

'What should I text him? Oh I really don't have any idea... Should I apologize? No, that would be awkward... Maybe I should act casually... But how? I can't... Auughh... Can't stop thinking about it! Focus, Ayumi!'

Her face was getting reddened again. She slapped her face with both of her hands.

"Oww.." She said.

Ayumi's mother was watching her from the small hallway. She grinned when Ayumi slapped her face, being flustered.

'My girl is all grown up... She's finally happy after her death.' She watched her bounce around, squealing. She was sad about Hinoe, but at least Ayumi was happy again.

Ayumi sensed someone moving in the hall. She quickly went out to see but her mother had already left.

'Mother better not have been watching me...' She felt embarrassed doing all the squeals that could be heard everywhere in the house. 'But there's no doubt she's been watching...'

'I'd better tell Naomi about this!' She thought excitedly. She called Naomi to meet up.

Yoshiki was walking on the streets. He was nearby the karaoke.

'Why do I suddenly feel weird... This place seems familiar...' He thought, staring at the place. Than he felt someone poking him.

"Yoshiki?"

Familiar, sweet voice. He turned around to see Ayumi. He widened his eyes.

'Oh shit! Gotta run!'

He quickly turned around, hiding his reddening face, and pretended like he never saw her.

"Huh? Where are you going?" Ayumi said, following him.

"I d-don't know you." He quickly replied. It was obivous that was a lie.

"Stop lying. I need to talk to you, Yoshiki!"

"That's Kishinuma, thank you very much. Stop calling me by my first name! I don't even know you well." He said, still avoiding eye contact.

"Ok, Kiiishiiinuumaaa, let's try this again." She said teasingly. "If you didn't know me well, than why did you try to kiss me?"

"That wasn't me! I'm sorry! I don't even know why!" He said.

"It's fine. I understand."

'How can she understand when myself can't understand?' He thought.

"But I seriously need to talk to you. And it's not about... you know."

They both fell in awkward silence for a few seconds, blushing.

"I n-need you to meet my friends. Well, our friends to be exact."

"Fine... But when?"

Then they saw a taller girl with short hair heading towards them.

"Now."

Naomi couldn't believe her eyes. There she saw Ayumi, and a 6 foot tall blonde boy. She couldn't even say hi since she was so shocked.

"K-Kishinuma?"

"Finally someone calls me by my last name." He said, looking at Ayumi. Ayumi gave an awkward smile.

"Naomi!" She called out before Yoshiki could say anything.

"Hello, new person." Yoshiki said.

Naomi was still in shock, but she managed to shake Yoshiki's hand.

"What's your name?"

"You d-don't remember? Oh yea y-you don't... My name is Naomi Nakashima. It's been a long ti- I mean, nice to meet you." She stuttered in shock.

(I decided to write their name as first-last order instead of last-first order since it sounds better..)

"I think you already know my name. And pleasure to meet you to." He said with a warm smile that he always gave to new people he met.

"Ayumi... did you tell Satoshi?"

'Satoshi? Hmm... Familiar.' His head started aching again.

"No... I didn't get to call him."

"I'll call him."

Naomi went away to call, but didn't go too far away.

"Satoshi Mochida is your best friend if you didn't know."

"Wonder how he looks like."

Yoshiki still felt awkward Ayumi being next to him. He slowly moved away from her, so she couldn't notice.

Naomi shouted, "He's on his way!" after she hung up the phone.

"Kishinuma, you have to tell us what happened to you when you went missing!"

"Oh yea... I forgot to ask that when we met up. But I really didn't have time to ask that since you ran off, huh?" She smirked at Yoshiki with half risen eyebrow.

"I had b-business to do!" He exclaimed, blushing. Ayumi loved using that as an advantage. Yoshiki's reactions were so cute every time she said it.

"Huh? What happened between you two?" Naomi asked curiously.

"Nothing big really." Said Ayumi, laughing. "Hey, is that Mochida?"

"Satoshi!" Naomi and Satoshi embraced each other. "Uhh.. Say hi to Kishinuma."

"Kishinuma?" He pulled away and saw him. "YOSHIKI?!"

"H-hello."

"YOSHIKI! WHERE WERE YOU?! DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH TIME WE SPENT TO FIND YOU?"

"Calm down! I'm sorry for... Whatever I've done wrong, Alright?"

Satoshi tried to punch him but Yoshiki blocked Satoshi easily.

"SATOSHI! Calm down for shit's sake! I told you, he has an amnesia!" Naomi yelled.

Satoshi then stopped, remembering that he had an amnesia.

"Uh... I'm so sorry. I didn't realize."

"It's fine, I guess."

Yoshiki faced Ayumi.

"Rather a strange meeting, I should say."

"Sorry about that... He was just worried."

Few minutes later, they settled down. Then Yoshiki started explaining. Ayumi already knew everything from Miki, but she still listened for his perspective.

"So... We should start discussing how we can get your memories back."

"Hmm?" Yoshiki hummed curiously. "What do you mean my memories? You mean the memories before the accident?"

"Exactly. I'm not sure if there is a way how to recall your memory back, but I assume it has to be something with a strong reminder." Ayumi said. She had a doubt about the theory though.

'He said he couldn't live without me... then why wasn't I a strong reminder..? Is there something stronger..?' She thought sadly.

"Were my... memories pleasant back then..?"

They remained silent. Yoshiki's backstory wasn't the best one. It was actually one of the bad ones.

"I don't want to live in pain if the memories are painful, okay? I am happy now, and I don't want confusion nor sorrow. That will just cause me to lose hope."

"But there is a memory... that we can never forget..." Satoshi said. He was talking about Heavenly Host. Yoshiki's only friends and the teacher he trusted died.

"Don't try to force me to remember again." He said coldly. "Maybe the accident was a new start for me. A chance that will never come again. I don't want to ruin it by the past memories. The past is history; the past is already gone. I'm not gonna let the past drag me away from my future."

Yoshiki turned away.

"Please, don't try to find me." His cold voice shocked them. He used to be nice to them, at least. He changed a lot too. He was more logical and smart. Also colder. "I need to go."

He walked away. And his friends from the past stood in silence.

"I have to make him remember." Ayumi said quietly, the silence was now gone.

"He just said to not drag him away." Naomi protested.

"I don't want to lose him." She said, looking down.

"You are being selfish!" Satoshi said.

"I am... But I can't help it. There is a person I know... who can fix this."

"Shinozaki. I know you've been selfish all along. Since Heavenly Host... Or even maybe in Heavenly Host, you were selfish. But not this much!" He exclaimed.

"But after all I've done to him... After I knew how much I HURT HIM! I want to comfort him. But I won't be able to do that if he doesn't remember!"

"He said he was happy now! It's just you, Shinozaki. You want him. You just want to wash off your guilt. Just for your guilt. Do you even love him? Or is it just a part of yourself that doesn't want to be in the pain of guilt anymore?"

"STOP THIS!" Naomi shouted.

"No, she needs to know. Did you even realize how much he cared for you? Even if you did, don't you have a slightest clue on how to repay that? You might think loving him back might, but no. He doesn't love you anymore. He doesn't even remember you! So repay him.. in an other way."

"I..." Ayumi was hurt by the truth. She closed up her heart, and stopped listening to his words. She was too fragile to handle the truth, so she ran away.

"Hello, Ayumi Shinozaki. What made you come here?"

"I have a friend who has an amnesia. I want to bring that memory back. I beg of you, Eiko."

"It's been months since my death. And this is the first time I've heard my first name since then..."

The girl named Eiko drifted in her own imagination.

"Eiko Shinuki."

"Yes?" She came back.

"I need your help."

"You want a cure for an amnesia huh... Can you explain how it happened?" Eiko said.

Eiko Shinuki. She is a natural born medium who used to be a psychology majored doctor. She was killed by using too much black magic, but black magic also helped her exist and live in this world. She had souless eyes and pale face, but other than that, she was perfectly alive. She was one of the master psychic users and black magic users. She was strong and useful. The only problem was that she was a sociopath. She would never help without making a deal.

"He got into an accident... and hit his head."

"I assume you had a fight with him before the accident?"

"How-"

"It's pretty obvious even without using my psychic powers... I can read it on your face. It tells all."

'She truly is an expert at these... The problem is that she's too dangerous, considering that she can use black magic.'

"When a mind shuts down because of it's pain... It means it is locked away. The cause is you. So you are locked in the deepest parts. That's why he can't remember you nor have feelings for you."

"But he almost k-kissed me..."

"Ah, is that so? Well that means the body is still aware. It's just the brain. When a human feels an emotion, the whole body reacts. So even when the brain can't recall, the body can."

"Is there a way how to bring him back? And possibly a spell to erase sorrow?"

"Did this friend of yours have a sorrowful past?"

Ayumi nodded.

"Then I recommend not to bring back the memories. Nobody likes to think of their sorrow, do they?"

'This Shinuki surely talks good... She's convincing me with words... But I can't give up on him.'

"You do know it's extremely selfish to try and bring his memories back just for your purpose, right?"

"He's not himself right now. If he remembers, I can make him happy again!"

"Are you believing that not-proved theory to hurt yourself no more?" She smiled. "You want him. You need a person to rely on. You only have him on your side, don't you? Everyone dead, the other two are already dating, so the only one left is him."

"I feel so bad for him. Being used by his beloved. You are a parasite, young lady. Look at yourself... Face the truth." She continued, words striking Ayumi. "Pitiful... Pitiful Yoshiki... Always have been so sweet and caring... But didn't get what he deserved... He couldn't even let go..."

Ayumi couldn't talk back. She felt like her mouth was glued together. Ayumi wondered how Eiko knew all of this.

"He is actually very similar to you, Ayumi. He has a fragile heart. He was afraid of losing you, so he protected you, but never confessed. He couldn't let you go... He didn't trust anyone else. Just like you don't trust other men except for Mochida..."

Ayumi felt tears falling from her eyes. Eiko grinned, looking at her, full of pity.

"His past, filled with tears that never shown. Wounds that you've made worse. Sorrow that would never be forgotten. Now he doesn't have any of them. But you want to bring them back?"

Ayumi realized she was right. Satoshi was right. Yoshiki was right. She wouldn't dare bring his memories back. The best thing Ayumi could do for him was...

...Help him when he wasn't looking...

...Protect him when he is in confusion...

...Prevent him from getting his past again...

...And leave him be...

Forever watching him.

To repay.