A/N: Thanks Mariel, Grovek26, surugasasa, AMBERJANUS, Ramyfan, Happyhoper and Zeehana for your kind reviews in last chapter.
Thanks everyone for the follows and favourites.
**This chapter is originally part of a very long chapter that I am still writing and wasn't planning to update until Easter. But the contents may contradict the memories and dilute their effects so, I decided to break it down and post it separately. It is still 'Grape of Wrath': Hermione's pregnancy memories of fifth month in France, just before she leaves for Beauxbatons which will be part 3/2.
***WARNING: SOME DISTURBING DESCRIPTION OF VIOLENCE INSIDE. READ AT YOUR OWN RESPONSIBILITY.
Acknowledgements:
** Thanks to Amberjanus for the list of English Sweets and Desserts. You are too sweet yourself. :))
**Some of the dialogues were taken from my most favourite HP book in whole series: Half Blood Prince. ;))
Well I guess that's all and now please enjoy and don't forget to leave a review.
**I have made a page in Pinterest, wholly dedicated to TPA, where almost all the characters as I see them (both HP and OC) as well as major and minor things are available as images. It doesn't require accounts and the link in my profile for those who'd like to visit it.
**My fiction 'The Poisoned Apple' has been nominated for The Hogwarts award in the category Hermione Romance. It is posted on the site and I would like you to cast your vote on the site under 'vote' tab.
The website is hogwartsawards DOT weebly DOT com **replace DOT with a . The link can also be found in my profile.
For adult theme this chapter is rated M. (HIGH MATURITY)
Disclaimer: The copyright to Harry Potter characters belong to J. K. Rowling. Any other characters are purely work of fiction and any resemblance is co-incidental.
Chapter 61: Grape of Wrath (Part 3/1)
Audré lightly tapped the brass knocker set on the polished mahogany door twice and waited on the threshold of the Delacour Residence patiently.
"State your name and purpose." a voice from the knocker asked Audré but before she could answer the door opened abruptly for her.
"Audré!" Apolline, looking both pleased and surprised greeted her heartily, "There was no need to knock. That's for strangers. You are family and could come in any time you like." She moved away and held the door open for her.
"I thank you for your kindness, Apolline." Audré smiled pleasantly, "But my mother would be turning in her grave if she sees that her daughter has behaving like a raging bull and rushing into people's home without bothering to knock." She remarked lightly and entered the spacious hallway, "I am sorry I came in a short notice. I didn't have much time to send you a proper owl beforehand and had to scribble a note instead."
Apolline shook her head disapprovingly, "You know, Audré, we Veelas can't stand over-formality." She snapped playfully, "I saw it with Jean too when she arrived here and I told her on her face that I will not tolerate such unnecessary politeness in my household. We – Chombrun Malfoys and Delacours - are a family now and there is no such thing as 'sending an owl' asking for visit between family members." She said firmly, "Now do you plan to stand here all the day?" she demanded from Audré who let out a mock sigh and followed Apolline to her parlour.
"I was planning to make duck pâté today and take some for my little grandson when your note came."Apolline informed Audré once they settled down on her parlour, "Adrian loves them a lot." She said fondly, "In fact, he wouldn't leave even a crumble of it on his plate when the lunch or dinner has duck pâté."
"I am sorry I am not an accomplished cook as you, Apolline." Audré said sincerely, making a mental note of Adrian's favourite food, "I know some cooking but that is, I should say, below average considering that I am a woman." she winked, "Anyways, I assure you that I will visit you another day to learn how to make my grandson's favourite duck pâté but right now, I am here on some serious business." She took out a roll of parchment and offered it to Apolline, who was sporting a quizzical look.
"What is it?" Apolline took the parchment and examined it in its rolled state, "It can't be…" she stopped suddenly realizing what the document could be, "Malfoy told you about the experiment?" she asked Audré albeit sternly.
"He did and I am the only person who knows about it." Audré replied calmly sensing the half-Veela's disapproval, "I know, Apolline, that you despise my nephew and rightfully so but I assure you that he didn't tell me to show off his bravery or desperation. It is quite the opposite." She confessed, "It so happens that after I discovered the truth, I told Draco that he is unfit to make any kind of amends for his crime and I will put your family and Jean's friends – Eva and Edmound under Fidelius protection if he tries to harm or use them as his stairway to get to Adrian. Draco took my words seriously and said he would try to befriend Jean's family and friends in proper manner to reduce the tension between them. He was true to his words this time and while trying to do so he landed on that deal with you. So, his telling me that he is participating in that Lupus Venom testing was solely based on the intention to show me that he was genuinely sincere about it."
"Where is he now? Why didn't he come? Why did he send you instead?" Apolline was examining the parchment from St. Lupus's Lycanthrope facility with a serious frown, "Or is he not very pleased with my last batch of memories?" she asked with a highly detestable expression.
"Draco is ill, very ill." Audré was solemn and honest as she replied, "Last night, the night of Lunar Eclipse, took high tolls on his body and he almost died. I don't know how he survived but somehow he came back." She said and Apolline looked up from the parchment with a look of disbelief and shock, "He was lying on a garden bench and screaming at anyone who tried to approach him when my daughter Lillian found him this morning. When I realized that he can't even stand on his feet, let alone walk, I asked Julian to take care of him, called our family Healer Cloutier to check him for any serious injuries and decided to come and obtain the memories myself. Besides, I need them for another purpose too." she stated.
"What purpose?" Apolline seemed deeply troubled by Audré's words, "Jean doesn't know that I am giving them to Malfoy."
"I need to see them to give Jean some Healing sessions." Audré replied truthfully, "She is becoming increasingly resentful about her life and I fear for her sanity." She said and Apolline looked even more shocked than before, "She is a strong woman, Apolline, and in her mission to prove herself even stronger, Jean, never told anyone what happened to her or what she had been through in last six years. But like rusts erodes the strongest of irons, Apolline, these traumas are finally eating her and I can't just stand and watch." Audré shook her head firmly, "I need those memories to know what happened to her; it will help me take appropriate steps for her healing."
"I am so sorry, Audré, I didn't see it coming." Apolline looked pale and pained, "I married Jean off to Malfoy and I never realized that she is sacrificing her mental sanity in order to keep her son protected from that monster." She broke into tears and hid her face in her hands, "Jean…Audré…she is my daughter…I love her and I just can't take it…when she is sad or…depressed…I tried my best…believe me…I tried my best to be her mother…to have her share her troubles…sorrows…with me…" she chocked slightly and Audré encircled a comforting arm around the crying woman, "…but she is so mature…even for her young age…that she takes it…as some sort of weakness…to cry and tell me what is…in her mind..." she shook her head sadly, "…I remember the day she told me…Malfoy is here…in France…at Paris…she was so shocked…that she almost drowned herself in the showers…trying to scrub herself clean…from her past…from his touch…I couldn't take her out of bathroom…and Adrian was watching…curious…why his mother was crying like that…" she choked again, "…he takes his mother as a very brave woman, Audré…and Jean was crying like that…so helpless…so scared…it took me hours to calm her down…and she took her supper straightaway and lied down with Adrian in her arms…she is so dependent on that little boy that…she can't even sleep without him… otherwise, most boys his age have their separate beds…and Adrian too…can't stand being away from his mother…they are like one soul in two bodies…Audré!" she let out a heart breaking wail, "Audré! Why didn't you tell me that my daughter…my Jean is suffering inside…I would've lay down everything that I have…just to see her smile again…have her free of pains…everything Audré…I would do everything…for her happiness…could've asked me for all the memories, Audré…and I would never hesitate to give them to you…they are hers…maybe I didn't give birth to her…but she touched my heart in a way that no one ever did…" Apolline was breathing heavily between her sobs, "…but I just couldn't take it…when Malfoy asked them…like they are his property…like he can buy everything with his filthy money…I hate him…loathe him…despise him…I don't know if there is…any word that can…describe what I feel…when I see him…but I don't want him dead…no…" she shook her head firmly, "…death is too easy for him…to escape the crime he has done…he should be kept alive…to suffer…for the rest of his life…" in anger, Apolline's Veela features were becoming prominent now, "…I didn't tell you, Audré, but I cry every time I make duck pâté…they are Adrian's favourite…or when I see chocolate truffles…they are his favourite too…or when I make Jean's favourite Banoffee Pie…that is an English dessert and she likes it…a lot…I learned making it just for her… and I cry and I cook…Gustave remains silent when he makes those origami…" she directed at the mantelpiece full of Japanese paper art, "…there is no Adrian to teach...to show…to play hide and seek…" she sniffed and controlled her emotion, "…there is no baking sessions on Fridays…before that, Gabrielle, Jean, Adrian and I – we all used to bake cakes, cookies…and Jean and Adrian would fight over chocolate and kiss…and now the house is so empty…sounds echo in the hallways…there is no Adrian to run and Jean to follow…" she confessed, "…no one…believe me, Audré, no one has been able to overcome the shock of Jean's marriage to Malfoy…" she shook her head earnestly, "…imagine if we couldn't…how can Jean?" she dissolved in helpless tears.
Audré let the distressed woman in her arms cry her heart out. It seemed like Hermione, Apolline too sported a strong shell outside while her insides were very soft and sensitive. Her words about her empty home were true for it was what Audré had felt before Adrian came to her Château – that with its vast emptiness and echoes of painful pasts – almost suffocated her. But the little boy was like a blessing out of blue and now Audré couldn't stand to pass a morning without first laying her eyes on that innocent face that so resembled his father – Draco Malfoy; she couldn't think of a night when she hadn't kissed Adrian goodbye or an evening when they hadn't shared a story about Peter's adventure or stories of Sinbad the sailor, or an afternoon when she hadn't seen Adrian take a little nap and play with his little friends. He reminded Audré of the innocent childhood she had sacrificed for the sake of her father, of tender moments she had spent with her mother before her death, of childish dreams that she had seen when reading a story book, of all the goodness of a young heart that hasn't still be tainted with the evils of the world. Adrian was epitome of that goodness to Audré and she clung to him desperately and realized too well how Apolline felt without the boy and his mother.
"Cry, Apolline, cry; don't be shy." Her own voice was too constricted with emotions that Audré was having difficulty in speaking, "We may be elders and have to be strong to look after our families, dear, but we are humans…we are prone to emotions…" she blinked away her tears, "To speak the truth, I don't want you to give me those memories, Apolline, I want you…ask you…implore you to give them to Draco…and Draco only…" she said and Apolline looked up, her eyes bloodshot and expression stunned, "…they way you are giving them to him." She said firmly, "You see, he is always accustomed to getting everything he likes or wants. Draco's parents spoiled him to hell and he was always been given everything he wanted. But now? He will have to earn them. He will have to earn these memories. It is high time that he realizes that he can't always have his way. That he can't always get what his wants. That his being a Malfoy doesn't make him invincible or indestructible. And your deal is making it very clear. You are doing it very well." She gave Apolline an encouraging smile, "If Draco is the man he says he is, Apolline, he will earn all of the memories from you and if he is not, then let him taste the bitter taste of failure. I just came because I am planning for another healing session on Saturday and I need to see and evaluate the memories properly before it. Today is Thursday, Hallowe'en is on Sunday and Rochés' hearing is on Monday; so that leaves me with just one day that is tomorrow – Friday to prepare. Otherwise, I would've waited for Draco to come and get them from you." She explained with a kind smile and Apolline nodded and straightened up.
"I am so sorry I broke down like that…" she looked uncomfortable, "I even forgot to ask you tea…" she looked mortified at the prospect, "come…come with me in the kitchen…we will talk over some tea and I will give you those memories." She stood up and they left the parlour for kitchen.
It didn't take for Apolline more than fifteen minutes to set down a tray full of croissants, tarts, crepes and tea before Audré who was curious to know how Apolline remembered the memories so accurately.
"I am curious to know how you remember all these memories by monthes." She confessed openly, "I mean, the memory that you say is of Jean's fourth month can be her sixth monthes too." she elaborated.
Apolline handed Audré a cup of steaming tea and smiled, "I have them written down by dates in my diary." She replied and Audré was astonished as to how this woman considered those memories as something very precious, "I am a midwife, Audré and I love my profession. I love it when an expectant mother comes to me and talks about her dreams of her unborn child; I love to see her shy smiles, her shining eyes when she rubs her little or big bump. Motherhood is a very special experience, Audré, it is not just having sex and conceiving a child; it is a beautiful journey to bring a new and healthy life in this world and I love to be a part of that journey." She said and Audré listened to her words, mesmerized, "There is so many things to feel, to understand when a woman becomes a mother. It is such an extraordinary experience." Her eyes were shining with new tears now, "Jean was the most exceptional case of motherhood that I have seen in my career of twenty nine years as a midwife. She loved Adrian so much, Audré, that sometimes I doubt even I loved my unborn children when I was pregnant and my pregnancies were not a result of assault. She was like a pregnant lioness who'd do anything for her baby. If you have seen the earlier ones you know some already but I assure you that I didn't give everything to Malfoy. I kept some precious ones for mine. There are ones where Jean would eat, puke and eat again thinking her rabbit is hungry; memories where she would come back from work, take a bath, sit on her windowsill with her book and once a while during her study she would talk to her baby." Apolline was smiling as she mused, "She would ask him, 'do you love Mama, little rabbit?' or 'do you know that your Mama loves you a lot?' or 'I wonder how your hair will be like?' or 'don't worry he will never touch you. Mama is here, little rabbit.' and you know who 'he' is." She asked and Audré nodded, "I discovered it accidentally one evening and since then I used to hide in a corner to watch them talk – mother and baby – it was a bonding that I have never seen, Audré and I will never give those memories to Malfoy. They are priceless for me and I wrote them down on a notebook and I read them often; it is like a beautiful story…so full of wonders and hidden emotions." She smiled and tilted her head, "I am sorry, I am taking eternity." She excused herself, withdrew her wand and Summoned a phial from the kitchen counter, "I am giving you the memories that both Draco Malfoy needs to see and you need to work on Jean's healing." She placed the tip firmly on the temple and closed her eyes to concentrate.
It wasn't that Audré was seeing memories being withdrawn for the first time in her life; she had seen those many many times; she had even done so. It was actually the contents of those memories that made her apprehensive and eager to learn more about the journey that Hermione had taken to have Adrian in her life.
"Here it is." Apolline withdrew a thick and sparkling thread that wriggled like a worm from her temple and poured it on the phial, where they swirled, "These have some of Jean's most painful memories that I, Apolline, know of. The rest is in your hands to explore and take out." She thrust the phial now full of memories in Audré's hands, "Remember, Audré I trusted you with my daughter." She gave her a pensive look and firm squeeze on her hands, "Help her, please." She implored.
"I will, Apolline." Audré assured her determinedly, "We are French and we never betray." She squeezed Apolline's hands back, "That reminds me that I couldn't thank you for your kind hospitality when Lillian visited your home last week. She praised highly of your cooking and Monsieur Gustave's graciousness." She finished her tea and stood up to leave, "Merci, for everything."
"It's nothing." Apolline waved her hand indignantly, "Actually, I am quite embarrassed that I couldn't take proper care of your daughter when she came here. She left so suddenly. I was planning to visit her and ask her to come again so that she could let me make up for the last visit when you came." She said sincerely and Audré smiled, "By the way, Audré, do you have anyone in your family who is related to Veela or is a Veela?" she asked her.
Audré frowned at the question, "Not that I know of." She replied truthfully, "My parents were not related or were not descendents of Veelas. We don't even have their physical features. Why?" she asked back, curiously.
"Well your daughter's blue eyes, silvery blonde hair and extremely pretty looks made me wonder if she has Veela blood in her veins." Apolline replied with a rather bright smile and convincing, "Does she?"
Audré considered the possibility, "Maybe there is, I don't know." She shrugged, "Her hair is after Morpheus who also had silvery blonde like all Malfoys have but her eyes are after mine. Anyway, we keep that conversation for another day when I come to learn cooking duck pâté from you." She winked and Apolline laughed, "Anything else?" she asked noting the slightly insistent look on her face.
"One last thing and then you can leave." Apolline escorted Audré to the entrance door, "What does Lillian like to eat?"
"Crepes." Audré replied simply, "Simple crepes with some chocolate sauce and cherries and my daughter is happy. She can literally live on crepes." She smiled slightly remembering how Lillian used to steal Julian's crepes too when they were young, "Thank you very much for this." she pocketed the phial full of memories, "and good day with your duck pâté." She waved her hand and bade Apolline goodbye before starting for the Apparition point.
'Draco, my boy, brace yourself for the hardest blow!' Audré thought resolutely before turning on the spot and disapparating into nothingness.
•••••
Draco was standing before the cracked mirror, his hands clutching the either side of sink and his head bowed as his sobs echoed through the bathroom which, except for the lone ghost of Moaning Myrtle, was otherwise empty.
"Don't…don't…"Myrtle's voice croaked from one of the cubicles, "…tell me what is wrong?...I can help you…" she pleaded.
"No one can help me…"Draco said, his whole body shaking from tumult of fear that incapacitated him, "…I can't do it…I can't…" he confessed helplessly, "…it won't work…and unless I do it soon…he says he will kill me…and my moth…" the rest of the sentence died in his mouth as he shuddered at that thought. He gasped for air, looking up from the basin into the cracked mirror to find himself directly looking into a pair of green eyes behind round-glassed spectacles.
'Potter! Dumbledore's chosen one! The one who is making me go through this hell!' before he knew, Draco had whipped around drawn his Hawthorn wand and without a moment's hesitation, sent a non-verbal Stunning Spell at his arch-enemy: Harry Potter.
It followed a fight that ensued between them, smashing the mirrors and cisterns that flooded the place instantly while Myrtle screeched "STOP! STOP!" over the flying jets of curses that either missed or backfired. After several unsuccessful attempts to blast away Potter, Draco was getting frustrated and impatient when he finally cornered the Gryffindor as he slipped on water-clogged floor.
"Cruci-" he cried blindly but couldn't finish the Unforgivable as Potter's curse hit him midsentence.
"SECTUMSEMPRA!" his opponent waved his wand wildly at Draco and moments later, an invisible sword struck him hard on face and chest. He felt gashes appear on his body while the blood he so bragged about squirted out profusely. Draco staggered backwards and collapsed on the bathroom floor with a great splash as his wand slipped out of his numb fingers.
Draco was shaking uncontrollably, trying to stop the bleeding and accompanied excruciating pain, when he saw a pair of horrified green eyes staring down at him before he drifted into a state of uneasy limbo.
He was standing beside an elegant and shining coffin where his body - its eyes closed, hands folded over his lifeless chest - was laid down dressed in funeral clothes as his mother's inconsolable wails pierced his eardrums.
"Draco! Draco!" Narcissa cried as a stony faced and forced calm Lucius tried to restrain her, "…my son…my only son…why didn't he tell me…I was his mother, Lucius…" she looked up at Lucius for an answer, "…why didn't he tell me that he…has been sent to kill Dumbledore…answer me...answer me…why my son should pay the price of your failure…why…why…why…" she was hysterical and breathless as she shook her husband violently, "…he was only sixteen, Lucius…couldn't you just keep him out of this…" she berated Lucius vehemently, broke free from his arms and landed beside Draco's dead body, gently caressing his pale cheeks, "Draco!" her whisper was barely audible now, "…my child…my poor child…what would I do without you…what would I do without you…what should I live for… what… should… I live… for…" she dissolved into tears and lost coherent speech.
Feeling extremely sad and helpless, Draco watched as his parents cried over his dead body, Narcissa howling and Lucius silently shedding his tears. He wanted so badly to reach out and wipe their tears, tell them that he had been a brave man and tried his best to succeed in the mission entrusted to him by Dark Lord and would've done so hadn't Potter killed him in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. But he couldn't. Instead, he watched them from his place beside his own coffin, powerless to convey the unspoken words which suffocated him even in his dead state until a high, cold voice ripped apart the mournful ambience of his funeral.
"Lucius! Narcissa!" Voldemort's voice was like silk dipped in honey as he addressed Draco's parents, "Don't cry, dearest! Don't cry!" he was gliding like an imposing black silhouette towards them with his pet snake Nagini hissing and slithering alongside, "Don't cry, Narcissa!" he came to a halt beside them, "Draco didn't die in vain! He died trying to uplift his family honour." He bend over Draco's coffin and run a long finger over his cheek delicately, the sight of which gave Draco shudders, "He was reluctant when I Marked him…I sensed it…I always sense…I always know…but he was brave enough to take up the mission I entrusted him." He straightened up and smirked cruelly at a shocked Lucius and speechless Narcissa, "So, don't cry Narcissa…" he said sympathetically as he withdrew his wand and Draco was suddenly visited with a foreboding sense of dread, "For I am going to send you join your son too." he declared as his wand lashed on air suddenly.
"Avada Kedavra!" Voldemort's voice was full of malicious glee as a jet of green light burst out from his wand and hit Narcissa square on her chest; forgetting that he was already dead, Draco lunged forward to save his mother from the deadly curse but it was too late.
Narcissa's elegant body hang in midair for a fraction of second before it landed gracefully at Lucius's feet while Voldemort took a dead aim on his chest next, "So, Lucius? Ready to join your family?" he asked casually and a petrified Draco was staring wide-eyed at his father when he heard a peculiar song.
With immense difficulty, he opened his eyes and found a pair of fathomless black eyes staring down at him.
Severus Snape.
The man was tracing down his wand over Draco's wounds and muttering an incantation that sounded like a song; half of his blood lost, Draco was too exhausted to even lift his head up and he waited as Snape repeated the strange musical incantation twice before lifting Draco into a half-standing position.
"You need the hospital wing." He helped Draco walk across the slippery bathroom, "There may be a certain amount of scarring but if you take dittany immediately, we might avoid even that." Snape assured Draco over deafening echoes of Myrtle's screams.
Draco, his throat dry from earlier sobs and subsequent attack, was considering on enquiring about his parents from Snape when the scene dissolved like liquid ink on water and he found himself standing before the Vanishing Cabinet in the Room of Requirement.
He was feeling uneasy, apprehensive, terrified even to open the door of the Cabinet that he had tried desperately to repair over past few monthes. His hands trembled slightly as he reached out for the intricately designed and heavy wooden door and he pulled it open.
A lone sparrow, its delicate throat slitted, was lying on the top shelf to prove that he has finally succeeded in his mission of repairing it.
Draco stared at the dead sparrow for a very long time before finally closing the door with a loud thud. He slumped on the dirty floor and looked up at the limitless ceiling as hot rivulets of tears slid down his cheeks. But before he could overcome the grief and guilt, the scene dissolved again and he was standing before Dumbledore, the man he had tried so hard to kill. His hand shook badly as he aimed his wand at him. Loud bangs and shouts were reaching their sanctuary as Dumbledore tried to talk him over the matter at hand.
"…no harm has been done…you hurt no body…" the old man's voice had no dread for his upcoming death, "…though you are very lucky that your unintentional victims survived…" over his words, Draco tried hard to concentrate on the Killing Curse but in vain, "…I can help you, Draco…" he said calmly.
The word, 'help' ignited in Draco the state of extreme helplessness he and his family was in, so he lashed out.
"No, you can't!" he gripped his wand more tightly to prove that his point was correct, "Nobody can. He told me to do it or he'll kill me. He'll kill my whole family. I've got no choice."
"Come over to the right side, Draco." Dumbledore was talking as if he was inviting him to a tea party, "…you are no killer…" he said and Draco couldn't help but stare at his Headmaster.
"But I got this far, didn't I?" he asked more to himself than to Dumbledore, his resolution crumbling with each passing moment, "They thought I'd die in the attempt but I am here and…and you're in my power…I am the one with the wand…" Draco waved his hand to remind him that he indeed had one, "…you are at my mercy…" he tried to sound gleeful at the prospect but failed miserably.
"No, Draco, it's my mercy and not yours that matters now."
Dumbledore's proclamation was so solemn and sincere that Draco doubted if he had ever heard one like that before. He was staring at the man with utter disbelief when his companions: Bellatrix, Carrows, Rowle, Yaxley and Greyback - finally joined him at the top of Astronomy Tower.
"We've got orders, Greyback, Draco's got to do this." said Rowle, "Now Draco and quickly." His voice was urgent.
"Come on Draco! We don't have all night."
"Now, Draco! Quickly!"
"Draco, do it or stand aside so one of us can do it!" Bellatrix snarled at her nephew.
Draco contorted his face, trying his best to muster the courage that was needed to utter those two words of Killing Curse when Snape suddenly came out of blue. He seemed like a dead man walking as he pointed his wand steadily at Dumbledore who was for some strange and unknown reason, imploring him.
"Severus…please…"
"Avada Kedavra!" Snape's cold voice echoed around the tower and the flash of green light that has emanated out his wand, threw the frail old man out of it like a rugged doll.
Terror tore Draco's heart apart as the scene finally shifted to the eerie silence of Malfoy dungeons.
He was preparing for another go on the freshly violated body when Hermione's eyes opened.
But they were not hers. They belonged to someone else; someone Draco loved as his sister.
"LILLIAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" he screamed and tried to roll over his sister's naked body as it changed its form, "I THOUGHT IT WAS HERMIONE!" he tried to show a legit reason behind his act.
"I wasn't Hermione, Draco, when you violated her. It was Lillian Malfoy all the time." his sister's voice weak and shaking from overwhelming emotion, "Your father kidnapped me, force-fed some of our modified Polyjuice Potion so that I looked like Hermione and imprisoned me here. Now look what you did to me? Look what you did to your sister?" she looked down at her injured body.
"LILLIAN, I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU!" Draco exclaimed and tried hard to get up but some invisible force was preventing him from doing so, "DAMN IT! WHY CAN'T I GET UP?" he asked desperately.
"You can't, Draco… because we are tied…forever now…" Lillian's voice was rasping, "…I am going to be…pregnant…now…and there is…no escape…" she dissolved into tears.
"NO! SHE IS MY SISTER!" Draco fought with all his might to detangle their joined bodies but it seemed to have a will of its own for it started violating Lillian once again, "NO! STOP IT! STOP IT! SHE IS MY SISTER!" He fought to get control his own out-of-command body, "SHE IS MY SISTER, YOU BLOODY BASTARD! LEAVE HER ALONE!"
But it seemed that his own body was unwilling to listen to him and it continued its exploits until Draco was completely spent.
"I AM SORRY, LILLIAN, I AM SORRY!" he apologized sincerely to the wailing woman underneath his heavy body, "I CAN'T STOP IT, I CAN'T BLOODY STOP IT!" he said helplessly, trying to pull out.
"You are a monster, Draco, you are…Lucius Malfoy's son and you are monster just like him." Lillian slapped Draco hard, "I should have never trusted you. You can't be my brother…You are a bloody rapist."
"I CAN'T STOP IT, LILLIAN, IT IS OUT OF MY CONTROL!" Draco bellowed at his sister, trying to make her see his helplessness, "STOP IT, YOU BASTARD, YOU ARE MY BODY! LISTEN TO ME!" he tried hard to regain control of his own body.
"Are you still not satisfied with your punishment, Malfoy?" Hermione's voice was shaking from pain she was going through, "Why don't you kill me instead and finish this torture?" She asked vehemently.
Draco was petrified as he discovered his body was preparing to assault the same woman once again.
"NO! NO! SHE IS MY WIFE!" Draco screamed and fought with what was left of his strength to separate their joined bodies, "NO! STOP IT! STOP IT! SHE IS MY WIFE! I LOVE HER!" He tried to kick his legs and separate their bodies, "SHE IS ADRIAN'S MOTHER, YOU BLOODY BASTARD! LEAVE HER ALONE!"
"No…no…not her…not her…AAARRRGGGGHHHHHH!" Draco was halfway through assaulting Hermione when he screamed loudly and sat bolt upright.
He stared blankly at the curtain-drawn semi darkened bed room, panting heavily as he tried to recollect his memories on what had happened after he arrived at Château.
He remembered collecting the document of 'Voluntary Participation' from Chief Researcher Descartes who had also shoved a satchel of galleons in his pockets with it, coming out of the werewolf facility and disapparating, collapsing on the grass beside Apparition Point on his uncle's Château, dragging his exhausted body through dewy grass and climbing on a garden bench.
He recalled in listening to birds and trees when Lillian finally found him lying on the bench and his screaming at her, warning her not to touch him.
That much was all that Draco could remember well.
The rest of his memories were blur flashes of distorted images, sounds and touches. He vaguely remembered the face of his cousin, Julian, carrying him to his suite, giving him a much needed bath for Draco smelt horribly of vomit and putting him on bed; he recalled the frowning face of a man, he thought he had seen before but didn't know where, to give him some potion and the last thing that he could recollect about himself before drifting into the worst nightmares of his entire life was his plea to them:
"I don't want to sleep. Make it stop."
Draco's looked down at his hands; they were shaking so badly that he had to run them several times through his still wet hair to steady them.
"No, I didn't do it. It wasn't me." he repeated to himself over and over again, trying to assure that he hadn't assaulted Hermione and Lillian, "No, Draco, it wasn't you. You'd never touch Lillian…you can't even imagine touching her like that…" he shook his head vigorously, "…No, Draco, you didn't do that to Hermione…wasn't it enough when you did it to her last time…hasn't it caused you everything you had…you can't do it…it wasn't you...no, Draco, it wasn't you, Draco…" he kept muttering to make him belief the truth.
Draco was so preoccupied in his own troubled thoughts that he didn't notice it when his aunt entered his suite with a large tray laden with food and stood by his bed, observing him cautiously.
"Draco, I see…" she stopped midsentence as Draco, startled at sudden appearance of female voice, almost jumped out of his bed, took up his wand from night stand and pointed it threateningly at her.
"What are you doing here?" he asked her gruffly, "I will not have women in my room. Now get out of here." He pointed a stern finger at the door forgetting whom he was talking to.
Audré placed the tray on Draco's bed calmly and held her hands in surrender, "I mean no harm, Draco. I am your aunt. I am your aunt Audré." she tried to remind him.
"Whatever." Draco spat, "Now get out and take that…" he tilted his chin at the direction of the tray, "…with you." He commanded.
"What are you so afraid of?" Audré asked, showing no indication of leaving any sooner, "Why are you pointing your wand at me, Draco? What have I done to you?" she asked him in an innocent voice.
"I am not afraid…" Draco tried to appear bold, "…I am just not feeling…you are a woman…and I am…" Draco paused for a second to remember what he had done to the women in his dream, "…aunt, I beg you, please leave…" His demanding tone suddenly changed into a sincere plea, "…please leave, aunt…please…I don't want to hurt you…but I can't help it…I am a monster… and I will destroy you…like I destroyed Hermione…and Lillian…in my dream…" unable tolerate anymore, he slumped on the floor beside the bed and dissolved into tears.
Draco didn't know if he had ever cried like this in his entire life. Crying among Malfoys was taken as a deplorable showcase of weakness and he was strictly prohibited by his father, Lucius Malfoy, never to do so no matter what happened. Draco hadn't cried the day his father passed away, he hadn't cried the day Scorpius bled dry to death and he certainly didn't cry the day he stood beside Astoria's lifeless body. The only two times he had allowed his tears to flow was after Adrian rejected him after he married Hermione and after he came out of Hermione's second batch of pregnancy memories, realizing for the first time the extent of her sufferings and his involvement in them. Other times, no matter how sad or depressed he was, he had contained all his grieves, sorrows and tears inside him like a roaring river behind a well constructed floodgate. But today, after discovering that he was still capable of repeating the same damage he had inflicted on Hermione to the women he loved sincerely, that he was still the monster he so strived to outdo, Draco couldn't control his tears and broke down before his aunt.
"…aunt…please…go away…I am…not…a man…I am…Lucius Malfoy's son…I am…Draco Malfoy…a rapist…I destroy…women…I destroy those…whom I love…leave me…go away…" he shook his head as he choked over his tears, "…please, aunt…I am a…terminator…I am Lord Voldemort…I am Nagini…I devour on innocent…women…go away…leave me…to die here…alone…"
A soft hand ran through his hair and Draco jerked away, dragging his body away from the touch he knew was Audré's.
"I SAID, DON'T TOUCH ME!" he bellowed at his aunt, who looked pained and deeply troubled, "I SAID…DON'T TOUCH ME!" he repeated feebly, his strength almost drained from all the crying and shouting as he joined his palms in an begging manner, "Aunt, please…" he panted, "…don't touch me."
"Why, Draco?" Audré ploughed slowly towards her nephew and reached out to take his hands, "Take my hands, Draco, come to me." she offered gently, "Come to your aunt, son."
"No!" Draco's resolve was crumbling before Audré's words like it did before Dumbledore, "I will…hurt you…please go…" he begged.
"Come to me, Draco, come to aunt Audré." Audré's voice was soothing to Draco's overwrought nerve, "Come dearest, come here…come into my arms." She kept chanting, spreading her hands to welcome him as Draco finally crept into them like a little boy.
"Aunt! Aunt!" he exclaimed, bursting into tears of despair, "Why do you love me like this? Why? I am not worthy of it. I am a monster. I destroy… I don't deserve love… I deserve death… I deserve death… I deserve death." Draco cried out in desperation.
As he cried on Audré's lap, there was a rawness in it - like the pain was still an open wound. He clasped into Audré's midsection for support as if his life depended on it and his whole body shook from vehement outpouring of tears. His sobs were stifled at first as he attempted to hide his grief but it was soon followed by a wave of emotions that broke him down completely. All his defenses washed away in those salty tears as he sobbed uncontrollably in Audré's arms and at last, when Draco looked up, he was a complete picture of loss, despair and devastation.
"Maybe…maybe not." He heard Audré murmured gently into his ears and she embraced her distressed nephew tightly, "It isn't out job to predict out death, Draco, for we are here to finish our mission in one life before we die." She said gently stroking his hair.
"I have no mission…I have nothing…" Draco confessed openly remembering the emptiness that he felt every day, "…mother doesn't even talk to me properly…Hermione doesn't even look at me…Adrian doesn't call me his father…what do I have to live for aunt?" his voice was trembling as he professed the hurtful truths, "…you say I am selfish…yes, I am…you say I am a Slytherin…yes, I am…but above all I am a human, aunt…even for a Slytherin, I have I a heart…I feel things that I never thought I was capable of…I couldn't take it when I caused that sparrow's death…I couldn't take it when Snape killed Dumbledore before my eyes…I couldn't take it when Voldemort fed that woman to Nagini…I couldn't take it at all…then why did I violate Hermione? Why? Why? Why?" he asked Audré distraughtly, "…where did this monster come from, aunt? Is it because I am Lucius Malfoy's son? Is it because in my veins runs the same blood that had been flowing through my ancestors for thousands of years? If I couldn't kill Dumbledore, how is it possible that I assaulted someone so violently?" Draco was hysterical now, gripping Audré's midsection more tightly, "I asked this question to myself many many times. Why did I do that? Why did you do that Draco? Why did you do that? You are not a murderer. You are not a womanizer. Then why did you rape Hermione? Why…why..why?" he banged his head on Audré's lap.
"I would never say it was mistake like you claimed earlier, Draco, because it isn't." Audré's voice was soft but firm, "Rape is a crime no matter what popular and pervert notions tries to portray it like – revenge, punishment, mistaken lust, or fulfillment of sexual desires. It is a grave crime; the second most grievous crime after murder and punishable only by death sentence; not even a life sentence in Azkaban or Château d'If would be deemed serious enough to punish the offender. You say you are not a womanizer, Draco, but you assaulted a woman in the first sex of your life. You say you are not a womanizer yet you unintentionally impregnated Jean in her first ever sexual encounter with a man. Is that a justification, Draco, to show on your part that you are otherwise a very charming man?" her voice was sharp, "Your reactions tell me that you had a nightmare of some kind where you assaulted my daughters - Lillian and Jean." she said and Draco shuddered at the mere thought of it, "If you are so repulsive to Lillian and me or any other woman with just one dream, something that didn't happen in the real, Draco, imagine how extremely frightened Jean was when she slept after her assault, something that was real!" Audré spoke out what Draco had been wondering himself, "If you are not a womanizer, not as selfish as we claim, feel things that you never thought you could, then tell me why didn't you feel Jean's fears, her repulsion, distaste, disgust, abhorrence, repugnance, nausea, horror, aversion and abomination towards you earlier? Why now? After such a long time? After that awful dream?" she let out in one sentence and paused for some air, "You confess that you are not as selfish as we claim for a 'Malfoy' Slytherin you are and yet you understood the truth only after reality hit you. Isn't that extreme degree of hypocrisy?"
Draco was staring at his aunt, speechless for he had nothing to reply in protest.
"You want to know what made you do that rape?" Audré asked Draco, her eyes boring into his grey pair, "Ask yourself Draco, what is it that drives you when you are extremely emotional? Who drives you? Was that you?"
Draco blinked several times, trying to fathom the real meaning of the question when the answer suddenly dawned on him.
That voice!
The voice of the cackling man who ridicules him whenever he tried to support Hermione!
The voice he tried to kill when he half destroyed his room after finding a hallucinating Hermione in corridor!
The voice he tried to smother the day he smashed the mirror and cut his hands!
"I hear…a voice…" Draco confessed after a while, feeling like a stupid fool, "…it's not hallucination…it's something else…like it's me…but I don't know…where he lives…he kind of comes out…when I am…extremely vulnerable…very emotional…tries to persuade me…to do things…I don't know, aunt…" he stared wide-eyed at Audré, "…I don't remember…why I did what I did with Hermione…I was extremely angry…beyond anything…and this voice…my own voice…he told me to punish her…in worst possible way…and I did…and I did, aunt…and I did." he broke off.
Draco was petrified at the discovery.
So, he was a monster.
Not as Lucius Malfoy's son.
He was a monster as Draco Malfoy.
So, Lillian was telling him the truth in his dream. It was true then that a monster drives him though it didn't succeed the night Snape killed Dumbledore but it did succeed in the most gruesome way the day he assaulted Hermione.
"Kill him!" Audré's command was demanding and Draco snapped back to reality, "Kill him, Draco and that's your mission for life." she seemed to read Draco's thoughts and her voice was like a spark of fire, burning his blood, igniting him beyond any words, "Remember I told you to die that day when Narcissa threw you out of her room? I told you to die Draco but you didn't understand me at that time; I am telling you again. Clearer than ever: kill him, Draco, kill him. Kill him and die."
"How?" was the only question that Draco could utter.
Audré smirked and took out a phial full of silvery substance that Draco was certain were Apolline's memories, "The answer lies herein, dear nephew." She placed the phial before him on the floor, "But don't think that it is going to be an easy task. My duel instructor, late Monsieur Faure, taught me one thing very well and it is that an invisible opponent is always harder to defeat than a visible one. This monster that lives inside you, Draco, is you in actual sense. It was born with you, he grew up with you and he drives you when you aren't noticing it. If you want true salvation, kill that monster and only then can you claim that you are sensible and selfless even for a Malfoy Slytherin."
Draco was still sitting on the floor when Audré Summoned the food tray to him and stood up to leave, "I have only three advices for you, dear nephew and I would ask you to follow them strictly if you want to succeed this time." She said and smiled kindly, "Eat. Watch. and Think."
And with that Draco's enigmatic aunt was gone.
Feeling a strange sense of determination coursing through his veins, Draco wolfed down on the food and cleaned up his plates in twenty minutes.
He eyed the phial that was still where Audré had placed it.
He needed to watch those memories.
The answer lied therein.
He must get rid of this monster.
Or he'll never get his mother, Hermione and Adrian.
Adrian: his sweet, little innocent son.
Hermione: his brave, intelligent and innocent wife.
And his mother, the woman who laid down everything she had to save him.
He was Draco Malfoy and if he, himself was standing on his way to his happiness, then he'd destroy himself to get to what he wanted, cherished and loved.
He would stop at nothing.