The Poisoned Apple

by SeveranSnape

An atrocious act by Draco Malfoy in the dungeons of Malfoy Manor forced Hermione Granger to leave behind everything she ever cared for. Six years later, Draco after losing all that he cared for, comes face to face with the consequences. The once innocent Apple now poisoned is his last resort. Will he leave behind old Draco and earn Hermione's trust for a new beginning? ABANDONED.

65. Chapter 65

A/N: Thanks to SereniteRose, Grovek26, aryaaa, surugasasa, cordee and ramyfan for your kind reviews on last chapter.

Thanks everyone for the follows and favourites.

IMPORTANT NOTE:

**This chapter is the third installment and hopefully the one before the last. Before you proceed, there are three things I'd like to bring into the kind notice of my readers. First, this is a very different type of chapter; I have never written anything quite like this before. It's a memory chapter that deals with all the previous ones in Hermione's account. It is also full of hidden symbolism and meanings that I thought suited the mood. Secondly, those who think that writing is a very enjoyable business, I beg to differ. It might be for other stories but a story like TPA is extremely difficult to write. Putting myself in the mood of those who I am not in real life and writing from their perspective for hours, that too when it deals with sensitive issues like rape, is never an easy one. I get disturbed most of the time for what I write because TPA isn't a fantasy; it's a fiction based on rude truths and I am a narrator here rather than a writer. Thirdly, this chapter contains words, sentences and ideas that might disturb you. So, read at your own responsibility.

Acknowledgements:

** The symbolism of forest was taken from symbolreader dot net.

** The poem that Audré chanted was taken from dream-world poems.

Well I guess that's all and now please enjoy and don't forget to leave a review.

**I have made a page in Pinterest, wholly dedicated to TPA, where almost all the characters as I see them (both HP and OC) as well as major and minor things are available as images. It doesn't require accounts and the link in my profile for those who'd like to visit it.

Several new images of Hermione and Adrian in childhood had been updated there.

**My fiction 'The Poisoned Apple' has been nominated for The Hogwarts award in the category Hermione Romance. It is posted on the site and I would like you to cast your vote on the site under 'vote' tab.

The website is hogwartsawards DOT weebly DOT com **replace DOT with a . The link can also be found in my profile.

For adult theme and words, the Chapter is rated: M

Disclaimer: The copyright to Harry Potter characters belong to J. K. Rowling. Any other characters are purely work of fiction and any resemblance is co-incidental.

Chapter 65: Word, Feelings, Memories and Plans (Part 3).

Within a gap of just one day, Draco was preparing himself to re-enter the Pensieve.

But this time, the memories were of his aunt Audré and she has given them to aide him in deciphering of the meaning of the previous memories that Draco had watched in the hope of answers to defeat his inner demon.

He eyed the phial for a while apprehensively before pouring its contents into the shallow depths of Pensieve where they swirled as usual, neither liquid nor smoke.

How very strange this past four monthes of his life has been!

Draco had never thought that he would set foot on France, get acquainted with his uncle's family that he barely knew; accidentally come across his one last living son; marry his mother - the once-hated Hermione 'Mudblood' Granger and then take on a daunting mission to beg her forgiveness.

How very strange that just within a span of two monthes of their marriage: September and October - he had forgotten all of their previous animosity and taken unthinkable measures to make her trust him: Unbreakable Vow, White Flag surrender and even risking his life to obtain memories that were concerned with their only son – Adrian's life inside Hermione while it was he who had caused that pregnancy by the most deplorable act of rape; knowing very well that he himself was the reason Hermione had left the country.

How very strange the last two monthes of his life has been!

Had he ever considered the possibility that he – the son of Lucius Malfoy and the pureblood Slytherin – would start admiring the one woman he had tormented all her life for her blood status?

Had he ever considered the possibility that the same woman would give him someone whom he would treasure to the point of breaking his old family traditions of begetting a pureblood heir?

Had he ever thought that life would bring him to a turning point where he would be making and sending potion for Hermione's fracture pain, participating in Lupus Venom testing for her forgiveness and kneeling before her to accept his wedding ring that he has bought to thank her? Or ask Julian to take them for shopping and dinner with his own stipend money? Or violate the Malfoy golden rule of not working and take a job in the ministry like any common wizard?

Had it ever crossed his ignorant mind that he would be so ashamed of his act that he would cut down Vincent Blanchard's hands just for touching Hermione inappropriately while he himself had touched her in a way that he didn't approve?

Honestly speaking, the answer was a straight 'no'.

How very strange this past two monthes of his life has been!

Draco had heard that it was always a tiny pebble who brings out a deadly land slide and seen the proof with his own eyes when a tiny moment in which Hermione fractured her own hand to share the same pain as Adrian had changed Draco's entire life and its damned perspectives. It was in that split second that his life's foundation as a Malfoy had been shaken and he was left bared and unprotected.

It was the unraveling of the truth that he had been hiding from his mother about Adrian's mode of conception that has finally brought him to his senses that he had been lying to himself to protect his heinous crime.

It was that evening when Hermione's helpless cries and curses had reached his ears through that implanted listening device that he had finally felt a hard slap on his face.

It was that song of saying without saying nothing at all in Hermione's lips and subsequent exchange of love-filled looks between her and Alexis that had brought out Draco from behind the safe walls of the notion that no matter what he had done to Hermione, she was still his wife and therefore not expected to be in love with another man other than her husband.

With every passing day of his life, his relationship with Hermione was evolving.

What had started with a so called marriage to keep Adrian under his guardianship has grown into a sense of responsibility to take care of his family. From classmates they have become a married couple and parents of the loveliest child imaginable; even if it was through rape; for Draco, Adrian was his one last hope.

And what had started as disapproval of continuing Hermione's decent relationship with Alexis for the fear of adultery has changed into his mission to watch them closely and know them better. He himself had admitted it from his own lips that Hermione was innocent and pure and therefore incapable of committing the sinful act of infidelity no matter how unhappy she might be. But even with that safety firmly implanted in his mind Draco couldn't help feeling angry and jealous whenever he saw Alexis with Hermione; the realization that Hermione's broken heart was already occupied by some other man who had won it with his miraculous way was just too much for him to bear.

After all, he yearns her now; cares for her and wants to make her happy. He longs to see her at mealtimes and feels worried whenever she doesn't turn up with Adrian. He lets her slap him in public and doesn't even wince or protest or worse try to use it to reach his own means.

Hermione and Adrian, they make him think differently about his life and he just can't imagine a life without them in it.

It is the dream of their love that keeps him going.

It is the impossible hope that Hermione will accept him on her own free will that makes Draco want to strive and be worthy of her love and trust as her husband.

It is them that he lives, breathes and passes everyday thinking that it will be better than the one that was over.

Hermione and Adrian…Adrian and Hermione…they were his true salvation and his aunt Audré had been very clear in her words about Draco's salvation:

'My duel instructor, late Monsieur Faure, taught me one thing very well and it is that an invisible opponent is always harder to defeat than a visible one. This monster that lives inside you, Draco, is you in actual sense. It was born with you, he grew up with you and he drives you when you aren't noticing it. If you want true salvation, kill that monster and only then can you claim that you are sensible and selfless even for a Malfoy Slytherin.'

Draco was watching the swirling memories with a lost look in his face.

How that one moment has turned his entire life upside down, shook all his previous beliefs like a destructive earthquake…

That one moment when Hermione had hurt herself for Adrian and Draco saw her for the first time under different lights – not a Mudblood but as an excellent mother who could sacrifice literally everything for her son.

And now he had embarked on a journey to find himself in order to win her heart, the heart that he had broken.

Was he up to the challenge?

Could be win this war against himself?

Was he…

'Enough Draco, enough! This is not the moment to back out like a coward Hufflepuff!' Draco chided himself, 'You said you'd do anything for Hermione and Adrian. Remember? You said you'd do anything!' He reminded himself.

'But you have done everything in your power, Draco.' another voice let out a snide remark, 'There is nothing more to do. Besides, Adrian – the real reason you are fighting this battle doesn't care for you at all. He spells your name as D-R-A-K-O. All he cares about is - his mother, that Mudblood. Better leave them and start a new life with a pureblood witch.'

'NO!' Draco exclaimed, 'NO! I CAN'T LEAVE THEM! THEY ARE MY LIFE NOW! I LITERALLY LIVE FOR THEM!'

'FOOL!' the voice was getting louder now, 'YOU CAN'T GET ANYTHING FROM THEM. THEY WILL NEVER ACCEPT YOU, DRACO. YOUR DEAREST HERMIONE WILL NEVER ACCEPT HER RAPIST AS HER HUSBAND AND YOUR ADRIAN WILL NOT ACCEPT HIS MOTHER'S RAPIST AS HIS FATHER. BETTER GET AWAY BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE AND YOU ARE IN DEEPER WATERS THAN YOU CAN ACTUALLY SWIM!' he warned him.

'I will not back off.' Draco declared straightaway, his confusion gone and his mind as clear as the morning sky outside that was visible through the large window, 'I know who you are. You are the monster that lives inside me. Aunt Audré was right when she said that the monster that lives inside me, is me in actual sense. It was born with me, he grew up with me and he drives me when I am not noticing it. She was damn right! You are the one who prompted me to rape Hermione when I was extremely angry; told me to punish her in the most humiliating possible way while I have never even kissed a woman forcefully in my entire life. You are the reason I am in this mess! Now you want me to discard my family because you feel threatened…because I'll have to kill you to get to them.'

'Like you ever can!' The voice was cackling now in sadistic pleasure, 'Yes, your seductress French aunt was right about me. Yes, I was born with you, Draco, I grew up with you. And I guide you because I know you more than anyone else in the world. I know your dreams, your desires, your ambitions, your strength and your weakness…I know how you can achieve your goals… only this time I am sure they aren't anyway related to that Mudblood and that rape child… don't you see, Draco, I am you. And you can't kill me…ever…because we were born together and we will die together…'

"I don't care! I don't care!" Draco bellowed in agony, "I don't care if we were born together or you know me better than I do…I don't care if you know my fucking dreams, ambitions or desires…I don't care…did you hear me? I DON'T CARE! I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS PUREBLOOD BULLSHIT!" he lashed out like an angry dragon, "Do you know why? Because Adrian is not a rape child. He is my dream child; he is any sane father's dream; he is strong, brave, intelligent and innocent; just like his mother is. He is my life…my soul…my everything…. and Hermione? She is not a Mudblood. Her blood and her character, both are purer than mine. And she is the reason I want to be a better man. They and my mother…they are the only people I care for. THEY ARE MINE…THEY ARE MY ONLY FAMILY AND MALFOYS DON'T LEAVE THEIR FAMILIES NO MATTER WHAT." He declared proudly.

"Don't brawl like a common drunk Muggle, Draco." the voice suddenly sounded authoritative like Lucius, "You are fooling around in vain. Don't you see? Even with the entire world laid down on her feet, this Mudblood will never accept you. You'll never succeed in getting her. Neither will you succeed in getting that rape child. So, don't waste your precious time after those bloody things and go back to your home in England. Get married to a pureblood witch and produce your own pureblood heir: the heir who is fit to bear the noble name of Malfoys; not someone like that half-blood. Don't waste your time and effort for that bastard rape child – Adrian and his adulteress mother – that Mudblood Granger."

"SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I'LL KILL YOU!" Draco screamed, whipped out his wand and placed it tip firmly on his temple, "Adrian is not a bastard! He is not a rape child! And Hermione is not an adulteress! She is pure and innocent and so is Adrian. I am the criminal here. I am the perpetrator."

"Don't you understand, Draco, this is a conspiracy and that seductress Audré is behind it!" The voice suddenly lowered into an urgent whisper, "It is a conspiracy to destroy our esteemed bloodline; the bloodline that has been pure for ten centuries. That Mudblood, she should have aborted that half-blood rape child the moment she found out she was pregnant. She shouldn't have kept him in the first place. As for raping her, Draco, you did the right thing. Trying to kill your mother or not, I bet a Mudblood like her could never manage to be fucked by a better candidate – a pureblood like you, a Malfoy. Your aunt Bellatrix was right when she said that your seeds inside her are precious considering her blood status. After all, they are pureblood seeds in a Mudblood womb. In fact, she should be on her knees thanking you for doing that. Otherwise, how could she have conceived that bastard that she calls her little rabbit?" he mocked the last three words, "She should be kissing your feet, licking your sole for what you've given her – Adrian."

"I have given her nothing except pain and humiliation." Draco spat, "I am the reason she is here in France, away from her friends, her family, the people she loves and the life she had dreamt of making for herself. I am the reason she is suffering in this marriage. I am the reason she is having nightmares on forced pregnancy. I am the reason Adrian isn't happy and he didn't go to school yesterday." Draco countered, slowly regaining his cool Malfoy confidence, "As for your bloody claims that I gave Hermione Adrian when I raped her, I would like to respectfully decline such claims." He said sarcastically, "Hermione isn't a product or a breeding machine who needs to be fucked forcefully to become pregnant." he said, suddenly remembering what Noel had said on Alexis being a potent man to inoculate Hermione with his sperm and impregnating her in an early age, "Pregnancy can never be excuse to justify rape on a woman. She could've had her children from a loving marriage, it wasn't necessary to rape her for that; as if the prime function of rape is to make woman pregnant. Under any circumstances, rape is a crime and I am the criminal here. Not Hermione and certainly not Adrian." Draco stated boldly, "If anyone has given anyone anything, it is Hermione who gave me something to live for – Adrian."

"Remorseful, are we now?" the voice asked him teasingly, "If you are the criminal and rape is such a horrible and punishable offense, Draco, why don't you just go and surrender yourself to the Wizengamot? Why don't you confess you crime? He challenged him, "Or are you scared to do that? Ran out of your bravery?"

"I can't do that. I am a Malfoy and that name still commands certain weight and respect in the Wizarding world." Draco replied in solemn pride, "Adrian is under my guardianship and if I go and surrender myself with the charges of raping Hermione, he will be stigmatized for the rest of his life as a rape child. He'll be haunted by people like you who will ridicule his birth, taunt him for the crime I did. It will destroy his life, his reputation in the society not to mention Hermione's too who will be looked down upon as a raped woman."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. You are trying to hide behind their innocent shadows." The voice let out a derisive laugh, "I know why you are being so noble. You don't have enough courage to admit your crime and therefore you are showing lame excuses." He laughed again, "You think you can defeat me with that double role of yours?" It suddenly became serious, "To achieve what you want and yet not pay for what you call is your crime? You think that late realization of yours turned you into some sort of saint who deserves to be worshipped? Huh…" it snorted proudly, "No, Draco. Your words on your own defense prove that you are me and I am you. We are inseparable and there is no way you can defeat me. Do what you can; watch as many memories as you possibly get but you can't defeat me. I am you, Draco, no matter what you call me – monster, beast – but I am you and no matter what you do, I remain and I reign. I am infallible and indestructible. I am Draco Lucius Malfoy – the last pureblood heir of the Noble House of Malfoys."

"Is that a challenge?" Draco asked, fisting his hands painfully.

"No, it's a fact and a statement." The voice replied firmly.

"Then I swear in the name of my only living son – Adrian that even I have to turn the world upside down, make the sun rise from west… I. Will. Defeat. You. And. Earn. Hermione." Draco proclaimed boldly.

"We. Shall. See." The voice challenged and then there was complete silence.

Draco closed his eyes and took several deep breaths.

He needed to compose himself before he dived into the depths of those memories that according to his aunt contained potential clues to understand Apolline's third batch of memories on Hermione's fifth month of pregnancy.

Audré had told him the previous night to take rest and watch the memories when he was ready and clearheaded enough. Draco had complied accordingly: taken a shower, finished his supper in his room and after a good night's sleep he has woken up fully prepared to watch the memories when that 'thing' attacked him.

Now he was determined even more to defeat that thing.

It can't exist if he wants Hermione and Adrian in his life.

He can't force them to accept him with that monster that still resides inside him and guides his actions subtly.

His aunt was right, Astoria was right; that this Draco must die and find his salvation in a new Draco.

With his mind made up, Draco took one last breath and keeping his eyes firmly closed, plunged into the sea of memories.

The familiar floating sensation being over, when he opened his eyes, Draco found himself standing on an unfamiliar room.

It was not like any room he had seen in the entire Château. A living room with tall windows, beige walls, pure white ceiling and a large chandelier - it had a mood borrowed from the villas of Tuscany. Draco knew it for he had been to Italy numerous times. He looked around trying to adjust his eyes to the bright light that was pouring in through two large ceiling high windows that overlooked the gardens and found the aura of the room warm, cozy and strangely comforting.

He looked around, saw that there was a large shelf standing on a corner with several photos propped on it and feeling curious, he walked over to it, intending to examine them more closely.

Even for a memory that belonged to Audré, the details of the photos were impeccably clear and Draco, suddenly realizing what he was looking at, missed two consecutive heart beats.

They were photos of Hermione and Adrian and judging from the looks on their faces Draco could tell that they were both younger when these photos were taken.

They were an incredible piece of treasure for his eyes. Five photo stands in a row, they were Hermione cuddling, playing or showing something to her son who looked so cute and adorable that Draco was engulfed by a strange mixture of pleasure and loss thinking that he had missed those moments. In every photo Hermione looked extremely happy, her usual innocent beauty intensified with the added delight of motherhood. Her mesmerizing brown eyes were shining and to Draco she looked almost like a divine goddess. He wanted so much to reach out and touch her, touch them and feel what they were feeling in those photos. It heightened even more when the possibility that he too could have been in those photos occurred to him. The hard and brutal realization that his one act has robbed him off the numerous opportunities to share those tender moments with this marvelous woman and their son almost suffocated him. He simply stared at those photos with a heavy heart, thinking that he hadn't been present when Adrian started crawling, or stood up holding his mother's hand or called Hermione a tender 'Mama'.

"It's better this way, Apolline when Jean is sleeping." He was brought back from his musings when Audré's voice reached him and tearing his eyes away from the photos, he turned around to find three other occupants.

One of them was Audré for it was her memory. The other two were Hermione and Apolline.

"Apolline!" Draco gasped, suddenly understanding what the whole affair was and why Adrian had said that Hermione has her 'mothers' to take care of her. He had used plural form to denote Audré and Apolline, for both women claimed that Hermione was their daughter.

So, his aunt has given him the memories of Hermione's psychotherapy session.

"There are numerous ways to perform a hypnotherapy or therapy using sleeping technique." Audré said as she heaved Hermione's head and placed it gently on her lap. Hermione, Draco noticed, was sleeping on one of the two double sofas that faced each other. Aside from it, there was a large wooden center table, a fireplace with wooden mantelpiece and two arm chairs: their collective ambience making the room elegant and comfortable, "Last time I asked Jean to travel back in time to the memories that were causing her pain – her assault and subsequent events and in order to reduce her inhibitions and to open up her mind, I behaved as if I was her real mother – Adeline Granger. But today, we won't be doing that." she said, running her hands gently through Hermione's curls, "Since I have your memories, I'll be more specific this time." she said to an intrigued looking Apolline.

"Where did you learn all these, Audré?" she asked her, running her hand on Hermione's sleeping face, "I thought you were a lawyer."

"One must learn many things to be a successful lawyer." Audré replied, skillfully bypassing the question about where and why she had learned the hypnotherapy which Draco knew were for his uncle Morpheus, "Before we start, I must warn you, Apolline." she said in a serious voice, "What I am about to do is a very advanced variety of Legilimency. It is not exactly Legilimency, it is like…" she paused and Draco held his breath in anticipation, "…Dream interpretation." She finished the sentence, "Dreams, Apolline, contain way more information than conscious thoughts. They are produced by subconscious mind and therefore not under voluntary control. Since Jean is having bad dreams my goal is to enter her dreams using Legilimency but instead of using it to read one's thoughts, I am aiming on reading her dreams or let's say bad dreams to find out what is the root of the problem." She said and offered her left hand to Apolline, "Take my hand and close your eyes." She said solemnly, "Don't utter a sound except for breathing. Don't be afraid. I am taking you inside Jean's head."

Apolline's face read of shock, surprise and awe as she silently took Audré's hand and closed her eyes. Draco was wondering what was about to happen next when his surroundings became black suddenly.

'What the hell!' he thought, looking around frantically for a possible cause, 'It was afternoon just seconds ago. Where did the sun go?'

His answer came almost immediately when Audré's voice reverberated across his head:

'As my body fades into sleep,
I enter the realm I seek….'

As my body fades into sleep,
I enter the realm I seek….

As my body fades into sleep,
I enter the realm I seek….

Take me…take me…take me, maman…

Take me to the realm I seek…

Take me…take me…take me, maman…

Take me to the realm I seek…

'Merlin! I am inside aunt Audré's head!' Draco exclaimed realizing that the loss of light wasn't due to sudden disappearance of sun, it was actually due to a simple act: Audré has closed her eyes and since the memory was her, Draco was seeing and feeling what she might see and feel.

'As my body fades into sleep,
I enter the realm I seek….

Take me…take me…take me, maman…

Take me to the realm I seek…'

With each passing moment, Audré's voice grew louder and more demanding inside Draco's head. It was a bizarre experience: being inside one's memories and then inside her thought that she was using to penetrate another's dreams. He wondered if his own would be separate from these once Audré entered Hermione's head.

'As my body fades into sleep,
I enter the realm I seek….

Take me…take me…take me, maman…

Take me to the realm I seek…'

And then, like a flash of lightening that almost blinded Draco, he found himself standing on a strangely familiar place.

"Forbidden Forest!" he exclaimed, looking around the place he was sent to serve detention with Potter when he was in his first year, "Hermione dreams of Forbidden Forest!" which reminded him that she was with them on that mission to find out the wounded Unicorns.

Even for a formidable place, the forest looked even more intimidating to Draco. Thick layer of impenetrable mist was hanging over ominous looking tree trunks. The creepy sound of rustling leaves sent a shiver down his spine and ferocity with which the wind was blowing almost tried to sweep him off his feet.

Draco wrinkled his nose noticing that the air stunk of stale blood. But that was not all.

The mournful sound of a woman crying helplessly was echoing across the forest grounds.

It was one of those cries that had the power to incapacitate one with fear and yet invite one towards the source of it. Draco was trembling slightly under the added effects of his frightful surroundings and the mind numbing cry, all the while wondering to whom it might belong to and whether he should go to explore more or leave the memory when Audré's voice came from beside him.

"This is the real state of Jean's mind." she said to Apolline, who visibly gulped, "In Druid mythology, the forest was given to the sun in marriage. Since the female principle is identified with the unconscious in Man, it follows that the forest is also a symbol of the unconscious mind. I told you once before, Apolline, that we are entering Jean's dreams that are produced by her unconscious mind and this is how it looks like." she commented gravely looking around the forest grounds.

"But what is she doing in a forest?" Apolline asked the very question Draco was thinking, "Does she have a bad memory here?" she enquired looking horrified.

"No." Audré replied and started walking towards the source of the crying, "She is trapped here. The forest is symbolic, Apolline. It isn't real. When I was a little girl, I used to play a game called 'Imagine your mind.' My maman taught it to me. I told you she was potioneer but she was herbalist too. She used to give me a challenge: imagine my mind like a forest and describe it with as much detail as I could." She said and Draco listened intently, "I would always imagine a really deep, dark and dense forest; they were even foggy, with very low visibility, full of scary looking trees, crooked mossy branches and with the sounds of hooting owls and screeching bats. When I told it to maman one day she became very grave. She said her imaginary forest was sunny, lush and green with tall trees and short manicured grass, full of colourful mushrooms and berries. Maman told this to papa who thought that I was disturbed in my mind and wasn't sharing it with them. They asked me what was wrong with me but I really didn't know." Audré voice was honest, "I guess, I was always like this, Apolline, perilous and dark. Parisian upper class witches are right in their claims. I really am a clever manipulator." She smiled.

"I never believed in all those rubbishes that circulate about you and Monsieur Morpheus, Audré." Apolline snapped, "For one, I know how people love to judge others without really knowing about them and for another, I have seen how they have maltreated Jean for the baby she chose to keep just because she loved it and couldn't bear to part with it. So, even if it is a popular concept that you are a very manipulative woman, Audré, I don't think they are right. Just like I didn't think they were right when they said those horrible things about Jean and her unborn son." she said matter-of-factly.

Audré and Apolline, Draco noticed as he walked beside them, were slowly entering the deeper realms of forest from where the sound of crying was coming. That sound, Draco was certain now, was none other than Hermione's for according to Audré, it was her mind that the forest they were walking on now.

"The symbolism of forest is very diverse, Apolline." Audré was telling her companion, "A famous Italian Muggle poet Dante once wrote in his epic poem 'Divine Comedy' that 'In life's midway, I got lost in the black forest.'" She quoted the line and Draco wondered in annoyance why his aunt wasn't walking faster to reach Hermione and was instead talking about symbols of forest or Italian poems, "If I take his words into account, Jean too has lost herself in this black forest in her life's midway." She said and Apolline shook her head sadly making the connection, "She was preparing herself for a new life with Alexis when Draco came out of blue and trapped her in a loveless marriage. Her mind, I guess had been like this since then; except I never had the chance to know it. She always appears so strong and resilient that it never occurred to me that she could be vulnerable or sensitive. But after I watched your memories, I understood, what material this Hermione Jean Granger is made of." Audré said and Apolline nodded in approval, "She is made of steel, Apolline, she'd twist but she'll not be broken. At least, not before people."

"I knew you'd decipher that, Audré." Apolline said as they neared the source of the crying, "That's the reason I gave you all those detailed memories that I thought had some relationship with Jean's sufferings."

And that explained to Draco why the memories were detailed and meaningless for him when he first watched them.

Apolline had intended them for Audré, not for Draco and therefore the contents had varied according to need.

"Where is Jean?" Apolline asked, visibly anxious now, "Why can't we find her?" she looked around.

"It's her mind, Apolline, and she knows every nook and corner of it." Audré replied, examining her surroundings with a deep frown, "She must be very close, judging from the sound of her crying." She commented and brought her hands to her mouth, "Hermione? Hermione?" she called her through amplified voice, "Hermione? Where are you?"

The sound of crying stopped at once and alarmed, Draco scrutinized overhead foliages that obscured the sunlight and then a voice suddenly exclaimed.

"Mum!" Hermione's voice was high-pitched and trembling, "Mum! Is that you?"

"Hermione? It's mum." Audré called after the voice, "Where are you?" she started walking fast towards direction of Hermione's cry, "Mum can't see you, dearest."

"I am here, mum, I am here!" Hermione's appeal was growing urgent and sincere, "Just after this tree, there is a large swamp. I am stuck there."

Both Audré and Apolline's paces increased considerably as they followed Hermione's instructions and soon came out into a clearing.

It was swamp indeed, a forested wetland with borders of thick tree trunks in the periphery. Hermione, Draco was horrified to see, was waist deep in what appeared to be…

"Quick sand! Oh my Merlin!" Audré exclaimed and ran towards Hermione evidently trying to get her out of the peril.

"How did you fell in there?" she asked her, grabbing her hand and pulling her tight while Apolline grabbed her other hand.

"I dddon't…. kkkknow, mum, hhoww… I fell...herrreeee" Hermione's voice was shaking so badly that Draco thought she was shivering from cold, "I waasss…in the allttterrr of marriiiaggge… waitttiing forrr Alexis…when malllfoyyy came and pushheddd me here… now no mattteerrrr howww hard I tttrrry…I cannnn'ttt come out of thissss quick ssssand…"

'Does that mean that our marriage is like a quick sand for her?' Draco stared, unable to belief what else to make out of it, 'Of the whole wide world for so many comparisons Hermione went for quick sand?' he thought half- incredulous and half-disheartened.

"Don't worry, dearest, we will pull you out of this." Audré assured Hermione who turned her attention to Apolline, "Mother, how did you come? Did mum bring you?" she asked her.

"Yes, I did." Audré replied and encircled her other hand around Hermione's right shoulder, "Even though I live in Australia, Hermione, I know who is your foster family in France." She said and Draco knelt beside her to help her pull out Hermione out of quick sand, "True that you've wiped the memories of my conscious mind, Hermione, but you couldn't wipe what was planted in my subconscious mind about my daughter, about my only child and I always feel your presence when I am awake. I can always reach you in my mind whenever I think you are sad or in imminent danger." She said as Draco grabbed Hermione's hand and pulled her with all his might.

With combined force of ladies and Draco assumed even his, though he wasn't physically present when this piece of memory was created, Hermione came out of quick sand and she lay on the forest ground, panting heavily and waist deep coated in thick layer of mud.

"Mum! Mum, I missed you so badly…I missed you so much…" she recovered her breath after a while and looked up at Audré, who for Draco still looked like Audré not his mother-in-law Mrs. Granger, "…mum…I missed you so much! Even if it was for just a week!" she cried and wrapped her arms around Audré's midsection, pulling her closer.

Audré bent down and kissed tenderly on Hermione's temple, "I missed you too, my Hermione…how could I not miss you…you are my only child…my brave daughter…the daughter that I have built to be strong…" she whipped out her wand and with a silent Cleaning Spell, the mud on Hermione's dress was gone.

"Mum, I am so sorry I did that…wiped your and dad's memories of me…" tears were leaking down Hermione's cheeks, "…It pains me so much whenever I think of it…think of that day…pains me even more than the day I was raped…I don't think I can ever forgive myself for doing that to you…"

"I told you, Hermione…" Audré, Draco noticed, was unabashedly using Hermione's given name instead of her middle one, "…mum never forgot you… a mother can never forget her child…you have one now…tell me, dear, can you ever forget Adrian? Even if someone tries to wipe it?"

"No! Never!" Hermione replied violently shaking her head, "He is my only child…my only hope…he is my everything…he is the reason I am alive and I am fighting." She voiced Draco's own view on Adrian.

"Then what happened so suddenly that you are distressed like this?" Audré asked and showed the swamp, "Tell me dearest, tell me. Tell me everything. Don't hide anything from your mum." she urged.

"…I don't know where to start, mum…" Hermione was sobbing on Audré's lap now, the sound of her cries piercing Draco's heart, "…I don't know where to start…"

"Let me help you, then, but before I do, let's get away from this place." Audré offered and helped Hermione to stand up on her bare feet.

Hermione, Draco noted, was wearing the same white robe she was wearing the day she was married off to him. He hadn't noticed her well that day, he was too busy formulating plans on how to get Adrian and comparing her plain look to that of Astoria's grandeur on her wedding day. Now that he was seeing her again in those clothes, he noticed that they were shabby and torn at places revealing her shoulder, thigh and back. She was limping slightly as the group slowly moved away from the swamp where Hermione was stuck.

"Let's all sit there." Apolline said after a while and showed them a place between two giant roots of a less monstrous looking tree, "I think that's the safest place until Jean regains her strength." She said looking at Hermione who looked desperately tired and close to fainting. Following her advice, everyone settled down including Draco, who was having a horrible mixture of guilt, regret and shame that multiplied with each passing moment.

"Here, dearest, take some water." Audré said as soon as they crammed themselves in the narrow gap between the tree roots and she conjured a gobletful of water before offering it to Hermione, "Don't ask me how I can conjured the water, Hermione. I know I am a Muggle." She said while Hermione gulped down the water like thirsty sand, "But remember, this is a dream and anything can happen here including me, your Muggle mum being a witch and visiting you with a Veela." She smiled kindly.

"I know." Hermione smiled back weakly, "I know it is a dream and you can be magical here even if you are not a witch. In fact, you don't need to be a witch to be magical because witch or not we all have some magic inside us and you have mother's magic – the greatest magic of all." She said and laid her head on Audré's bosom, "I miss you, mum, I miss you terribly." she cried softly and snuggled against her.

"I miss you too, my love." Audré placed her chin on Hermione's head, "How long have you been in here, dearest? The last time we met you weren't here."

"Yeah, I know, mum. Last time I was Uncle Morpheus's study when aunt Audré put me into some sleep and we talked. I was even well for a while but then I don't know. I don't know how I came here. Maybe I was here from the day I got married to Malfoy…and I didn't realize it…" Hermione replied, fresh tears pouring out of her brilliant brown eyes that were lifeless now, "…or maybe I am here from the day I was raped in his manor…"

"…if it pains you, my love…" Audré kissed on Hermione's temple, "…let's talk about something else… you told me up to the point when you came to France. What happened after that?" she asked gently.

"I remember crossing English Channel and entering France – the land of my grandma Jean Créquy." Hermione said, sniffing, "I remembered out last time there, when we visited France before my third year in Hogwarts. I remember how happy I was to visit the land where one of my ancestors had lived. Compared to that, mum, this time my heart was hollow and emotionless. I was completely alone, had a three monthes old baby in my womb and I had just left behind all those I loved and cared and left my country like a plunderer or criminal did. The journey had no charm for me; it was like a burden. Just after EuroStar crossed the border of France, I went to washroom and locked myself in there. I cried and cried and cried, mum…cried thinking of you, dad, Harry, Ron, Hogwarts and everyone and everything…I cried and cried and cried…I don't even know from where all those tears came from…I have never cried like that in my entire life…I cried for the baby I was carrying… for the innocent life who wasn't responsible for what happened to him…what was his fault in it, mum?…was it his fault that Malfoy raped me and he was conceived out of it?…" she asked desperately.

Draco was having such excruciating pain in his heart that he wished it stopped beating and he was spared of the agony of living with his crimes. How was it possible that he called himself a human, tortured a fellow human being like this and never felt it until this moment?

"…I cried long after train stopped and everyone got off from it…" Hermione started again, "…then I washed my face and tried to clean the stains of tear. I didn't want the Delacours to think that I was weak. I am not weak, mum, I am strong…strong like the way you wanted me to be…strong because I was a Gryffindor." She sniffed and wiped her nose in her sleeves, "I was late when I finally found them in platform…waiting for me…Alexis was the first person who noticed me while mother Apolline was scanning Muggle crowd anxiously for me… they had thought that the train was late…when mother asked me why I was late, I lied to her and said that I was feeling dizzy and decided to take some rest before leaving the train…"

From her words, Draco was reminded of the timid gazelle that Hermione looked like when she had approached Alexis in cautious steps, of how she had winded her overlong shirt over her midsection to hide and protect her still very tiny baby.

"I never knew you were such a convincing liar, Jean." Apolline commented gravely, "Had your mum not been here, I wonder if I have ever known the truth."

"My daughter isn't a liar, Apolline." Audré smoothed Hermione's hair and smiled, "I have brought her up in a way so that she becomes a strong and independent woman one day; not the kind who'd snivel behind a man. She didn't lie, Apolline, she just chose to spare you the horror of truth; the horror that she couldn't bear herself. Don't we all do that at some point of life?" she asked her, "Now tell me what happened after that."

"I came to Delacour residence and started living there." Hermione started, "Mother gave me a large suite for my own personal use. I hadn't expected that. After Malfoy manor, I was prepared for everything and I had thought that life was taking a downward course for me. I was anxious about my school and my first priority was Beauxbatons. Fleur had told me that she would send a letter to Headmistress Madame Maxime and she really did. Mother took me to Beauxbatons during the summer break and I met Madame. She interviewed me, asked me what Fleur meant by writing that I wasn't capable of attending Hogwarts and I told her that I was pregnant. Like everyone else, she asked me the default question of why had I chosen to keep the baby that can be easily and legally aborted since it was conceived from rape. I had thought, after all, she was an educated woman herself and would understand the difficulty of my situation. But no; she didn't and asked me the same damned question that I thought common people will be asking me. I just couldn't tolerate it at that moment, mum, so many questions…so many justifications for keeping the baby I loved? Why? Just because Adrian wasn't conceived the usual way? Where were this goddamn people when Malfoy raped me? Why can't they go and ask him why he did that? Why are they asking me why I have kept the child instead of asking the real bastard why he did that to me? Why? Because I am a woman and they are supposed to be vulnerable and weak? And sit and digest any amount of injustice that men inflicted on them?"

Draco didn't know which of the questions was hardest for him to answer: why he raped Hermione or why he wasn't charged or why were women expected to endure such horrific crimes against them?

"I told outright on her face that I can't kill an innocent child just because his real father raped me." Hermione went on, "I said, I have no problems if they don't accept pregnant pupils in Beauxbatons and I'd pursue my career elsewhere. I was not going to let them dictate my life with some ridiculous rules and norms." She said firmly, "But then Madame Maxime stopped me and told me that I am to join her school on coming September."

"I am glad that she finally came to her senses." Audré commented, "What happened after that, dearest? Did anyone else torment you, Hermione?"

"No, mum. Not until I got the job of an asstt. Librarian in a Wizarding library not so far from Delacour residence." Hermione replied, "Mother took me there. The chief librarian, Bélanger, interviewed me and told me that they can't pay me full because I was still an undergraduate. I was in dire need of money, mum and I accepted the job thinking that I'd be in touch with things I love the most: books. I thought if I have job satisfaction then the salary - two fifty galleons wouldn't matter. How very wrong I was!"

"How come?" Audré asked, frowning so deep that Draco almost believed that she didn't know anything about Hermione's colleagues and most importantly - Vincent Blanchard.

"After Madame Maxime, I knew I'd be asked the same question about why I kept a baby whose father didn't care about him." Hermione replied, "So, I never told anyone that I was pregnant. I thought that they'll eventually realize it with time, mum, when my stomach grows but by that time, I'd be leaving for Beauxbatons. So I used to keep my very small bump covered to avoid untoward attention and questioning. But no; looked like fate had different arrangements for me." she sighed, "Among my colleagues was a woman called Cynthia Janvier. She was one of the senior staffs, an elderly witch with lot of children and even more interest in other people's lives that doesn't concern her. She noticed my small but growing bump and asked me if I was pregnant. I don't know what happened to me, mum, I wasn't planning to lie to her. So I said that I was pregnant."

"What's her problem with that?" Audré asked, visibly angry, "It's your baby. Not her."

"You didn't these people mum. You don't know this Wizarding world." Hermione said, "I mean, I am not complaining but the magical community isn't very broad minded when it comes to woman empowerment or their identity. Mother told me this when I asked her why people were so sensitive to the concept of single parenthood when it's quite common among Muggles? She said that magical community doesn't want to change from their old beliefs and mum, after what I saw in England in the name of pureblood supremacy, I honestly couldn't disagree with her. Just think why that Voldemort gained such popularity and gang of followers? Because he said that he wanted to bring out witches and wizards out of their hiding and claim their rightful place? Why? Because they have power and Muggles don't. If a society believes in such crap in twentieth century what else can you expect from them, mum?"

"But that doesn't explain why Cynthia should have prejudice against your baby?" Audré asked solemnly.

"It does, mum." Hermione replied, "I mean, I was brought up in a family where females were highly educated. My grandmother, Hermione Leeds – she was professor of English. Our mom, Jean Créquy was independent and brave woman; brave enough to come and live in a foreign country when a war was waging. You were a student of dentistry in Bristol dental college – one of the most prestigious colleges in whole Britain. Every female in my family had their own individual careers; their own identities. But in Wizarding world? Most women here are housewives. Take Mrs. Weasley for example. She is Mrs. Molly Weasley not Molly Prewitt which was her maiden name. I have hardly seen any women potioneer, scientist, lawyer, wandmakers. And here, all women are expected to change their names once they are married. Even Ginny Weasley became Ginny Potter when she got married to Harry. How many of the Muggle women do that, mum?"

"Point taken." Audré commented gravely, "So the society that you live in hasn't advanced well when it comes to females and they seem to living in the medieval era."

"Not medieval era, au…Adeline." Apolline controlled her tongue at the right moment, "We don't live in medieval era but it isn't modern like Muggles either. Our society is strictly patriarchal."

"I see." Audré nodded and gave Apolline a warning look, "So, what happened after that Cynthia or whatever asked you about your pregnancy?"

"The usual questioning." Hermione replied, " 'Who the father is', 'If I am married or not', 'if not, do I have a boyfriend', 'if I don't have a boyfriend, what I plan to do with the baby all alone' etc. etc. etc. I was annoyed and not ready to answer her foul questions. So, I told her on her face that it was none of her business and she should keep her nose buried in her own problems. Cynthia didn't like it. She was one of the senior staffs and no one had ever spoken to her like that before me. So she got furious and told my boss Bélanger about my pregnancy. She must have hinted something like I don't work properly because Bélanger immediately called me to his office. He wasn't all at pleased with the news that one of the staffs was pregnant out of wedlock. He asked me why I didn't tell him that I was pregnant at the time of my appointment. I said it was not required for me to inform him about it since my pregnancy is completely my personal issue. Then he said that had he known that I was pregnant, he wouldn't have hired me."

"Why?" Audré asked furiously, "He has no right to say that to any woman, Hermione. For God's sake, pregnancy isn't a disease and no one can be denied of work because of it."

"That's Muggle world, mum and this is magical world that I am talking about. This is the world for which I sacrificed even my parents and look what I received in return? The title of Mudblood. This is the world where I was raped because I touched Malfoy's precious pureblood mother." Hermione said and Draco came back to his senses when his name was mentioned, "This is the world where I worked hard from the moment I set my foot on Hogwarts to prove that I was as much magical as a pureblood or a half-blood was. But even with everything, with Voldemort finally being defeated the society didn't completely change. I am still considered a Mudblood here and my son - a half-blood."

"I never knew you were going through so much, Hermione." Audré said gently stroking her curls as Draco hung his head in shame, realizing how true the statement was, "What happened after that? Did Bélanger fire you from job for being pregnant?"

"No." Hermione replied, "But he told me to look for another job because…" she paused casting a wary look at Apolline's direction, "…because he didn't want to pollute the environment of his precious library by hiring unmarried pregnant witches." She bit her lips.

"Hey, you didn't say that to me at that time." Apolline fired up at once, "You said he didn't like pregnant woman because they can't work properly."

"That must another safe lie Hermione told you, Apolline, to restrain you from biting that Bélanger's head off." Audré said grimly, "

"I am sorry mother that I lied to you but I had no choice. I know that you are always there to fight for me and that is the reason I call you my 'mother'." she told an angry Apolline, "But how many times are you going to fight for me? How many views can you change? The world is full of selfish people like Bélanger and Cynthia and how many times can I avoid them?"

"As many times as it is needed, Jean." Apolline replied angrily, "I don't care what people think about you. They are bloody hypocrites! You should have told me that piece of truth and I could've spared you that horrible encounter with Blanchard."

"Why? What happened?" Audré asked with such concern that Draco thought she didn't know a thing about Hermione's second almost-assault, "Who is that Vincent? What did he do to my daughter?" she embraced Hermione protectively.

Both Draco and Hermione paled considerably as the question was asked and then Hermione replied slowly.

"Vvvincenttt…" she stammered, "He tried to rape me, mum." She confessed, closing her eyes to bar the painful memory.

"WHAT?" Audré screamed so loudly that Draco almost toppled of the root he was sitting on, "HOW? WHEN? WHY?" she asked looking scandalized.

Hermione's already bloodshot eyes filled with tear again and she started to cry in earnest.

"I am so sorry, mum, I am so sorry…" she said burying her face on Audré's bosom, "I am so sorry that I forgot that men are after all 'men'. That they are not used to see an independent woman. That they still consider us a some kind of sex toy." She broke off and dissolved into tears.

"No, Hermione, no. No my love, don't cry like that." Audré too was crying now, "That's not true. Not all men are like that. Some are good."

"Why then… a man who… was old… enough to be my father… tried to rape me, mum?" Hermione's words were suffocating Draco, "It was lunch time that day and the library was deserted. I was preparing to go for lunch too when Vincent called me to help him with a book in archive room." she paused and Draco's every nerve went taut remembering what had happened there, "I followed him there and he showed me an old copy of book. I examined it and it struck me odd because it was in a perfect condition. But before I could ask him what was wrong…he attacked me from behind and put a Full Body Bind on my body…"

Draco closed his ears unable and unwilling to hear more of the horrific story.

There was no way he was going to relive what he had heard in Hermione's second batch of pregnancy memory. One rape was horrific enough to traumatize a woman for lifetime and another almost attempt on top of it was more than any being can imagine. He remembered how he had felt when he raped both Hermione and Lillian in his nightmare. If he felt that after raping them, what was Hermione supposed to feel?

"…when Vincent took out his…his…that thing…to violate me…" Hermione's faint voice was still reaching Draco's eardrums even though he has plugged them, "…it reminded me of Malfoy's one…I can never forget what it looked like…when it was fully erect…and it created such strong emotion that I suddenly felt extreme fear and rage…I felt like if I let this man touch me…I will let Malfoy win over me again…and the next thing I knew was I was miraculously free…" Hermione's voice was shaking very badly "…I kicked him on his bare crotch…the kick I should have given to Malfoy…jumped out of the table and grabbed my wand…and cursed him into oblivion…cursed him, cursed him and cursed him until I couldn't curse anymore…" she broke off.

"My daughter…my child my Hermione…my brave Hermione…" Audré was wailing and Draco opened his eyes and ears, "…I am so proud of you my child…I am so proud… you are so brave…s strong…was that bastard punished for attacking you? Did someone cut his thing?" she asked furiously.

"No and yes." Apolline replied this time, noticing that Hermione wasn't in a state to reply, "At first that bastard Bélanger blamed Jean for trying to seduce his precious Vincent. Cynthia and others testified against her and took her being pregnant as a character certificate. When she returned and told me everything, I decided that it was enough. I wasn't going to lie still and let Jean bear this memory. No." she shook her head, "When I told it to Gustave and Alexis, they were beside themselves in anger. Alexis immediately lodged a complaint against Vincent Blanchard for attempted rape on Jean in the Department Of Woman and Child Welfare and they interrogated Vincent on Veritaserum."

"…Under Truth Potion, mum, he confessed of his crime and was sent to French Wizarding prison – Château d'If." Hermione completed the rest of the story and looked up at Audré, "…believe me, mum, never until that point it occurred to me that a man his age can try to rape me…never…I mean, he was so kind and fatherly that I never considered such possibility…I felt like that story that I read when I was a kid…Red Riding Hood when the wolf tried to fool her to eat her… all my life I had friends who were boys… Harry, Ron, Neville, Dean, Seamus…but they never even looked at me as if I was a girl let alone think of harassing me sexually or assaulting me... I even lived with Harry and Ron in the same tent for almost a year in good faith that they wouldn't try to touch me that way…even Malfoy…I never thought he was capable of doing that to his own classmate…no matter how much he hated me…but…but after Malfoy Manor…I lost faith in humanity…in men…I realized that no matter what I did women are never safe…nowhere in this world…someone is always waiting for them…lurking in the shadows…or behind the mask of a good colleague…or friend…or classmate…" she hiccupped.

Hermione's cries and words were way too painful for Draco to endure. Her explanation made it sound thousand times more horrible and he felt someone was slicing his heart alive.

"…I lost my faith, mum, I lost my faith…" Hermione was still chanting that same sentence, "…I even wanted to have a daughter instead of a son…I was so toxic to them…but then I slowly regained my faith…with father Gustave and his care…with Alexis and his love and respect…I slowly regained it…"

"That's alright my child…that's fine…we don't have to trust everybody…we need to trust only those who are worthy of it…" Audré's voice was rasping from emotion, "…I am sure that both Monsieur Gustave and Alexis are worthy of it."

"They are, mum, they are. Even Edmound my friend is a very kind man." Hermione supplied, "You should have seen father Gustave's face when his aunt insulted me. I have always seen him as an amiable and good natured man; never thought he was capable of being that angry. But that day, I saw how terribly furious he can be."

"Why? What happened?" Audré asked as if she didn't know anything, "Why was he angry?"

"It was my last month before going to Beauxbatons and I was jobless, sitting idly at home with nothing but lots of worries to give me company." Hermione started, "My baby was almost five monthes then…and I had always dreamt of so many things for my first child…to buy so many things for him and…there I was… penniless and jobless." She sighed so heavily that Draco felt a sharp stab of pain on his heart, "One evening mother came and told me that a certain guest – her name was Margot – was going to spend a week in Delacour residence. She said that this woman had the same nausea and sensitivity for women who became pregnant out of wedlock. By that time I was asking myself if anyone wasn't. Anyway, mother told me to keep to my quarters and avoid this woman at all costs because she can be really horrible. I, myself, wasn't feeling a fit of gallantry to prove that I am Gryffindor, mum; I had too many issues to deal with: baby, books, studies, job and money to name a few. So, I said that I will." She paused and let out a heavy breath.

"Here Jean, have some water." Apolline offered Hermione this time, "Your throat must be dry from all this talking to your mother."

"No…I am fine…I have wanted to tell her these things for a very long time." Hermione accepted the goblet and emptied it, "Margot came at last and while she was staying there, I kept to my quarters. Mother had been true to her word and given her the guest room furthest from my quarters on eastern wing. Everything was going well except for Gabrielle who was complaining heavily about to Margot whenever she brought meal for me. She couldn't stand her, mum, in fact nobody in the entire household could but she was father Gustave's aunt and they had to tolerate for the sake of decency and manners. The week was slowing coming to end and it was just two days before Margot would be gone for good when something happened again."

"What was it this time?" Audré asked looking extremely cross, "Why do all the maniacs find their way to my daughter? Don't they see anyone else?"

"I suppose no, mum." Hermione replied quietly, "I am the Mudblood remember." She said ruefully, "One morning after breakfast I was studying in my room when I felt my baby move inside me. Oh, mum! I don't know how to describe that feeling. It was so amazing, the feeling that a baby was moving inside me…that let me know that it was alive…and I was so worried till that moment because I kept having nightmares that Malfoys will come and kill my baby. One night I had some spotting and thought that I miscarried because I had had a horrible dream about a snake eating my little rabbit just before it. So, when my baby moved, I was so overwhelmed, mum that I sent a Patronus to mother."

Draco sincerely didn't want to listen to what had happened afterwards. His anger on Margot for insulting Hermione still hasn't dissipated and here he was listening about it from Hermione's own lips.

"Mother came, mum, and so came Margot." Hermione continued, "I had just placed mother's hands on my bump and we were appreciating the feeling when she barged into my quarter and started insulting me. Mother tried to protect me from it but she wouldn't listen. Asked me why I was there instead of my husband's place. I had been tolerating her cruel words until that moment, mum, but when she asked me where my husband was, I just couldn't take the injustice anymore. I said that I don't have a husband."

Draco cringed and closed his eyes.

"Why is it always so important to have a husband, mum, why I must have a husband to have a child?" Hermione asked Audré, breathing heavily, "I mean, I have nothing against marriage but am I worth nothing? Nothing? If I don't have the tag of a husband I am slut? If my baby doesn't have the tag of a father he is bastard? What is this nonsense? What is this nonsense society and its blasted tradition where a man is considered next to God and a woman nothing but his slave? Malfoy is a rapist and yet his children and wife are all honoured and respected while I am a slut and my baby is a bastard? Why? Because he is a man or he had money?"

"None." Audré replied, "It has nothing to do with being male or having money. All children are born innocent Hermione, they are not bastards no matter from which walk of life they come from. It is their actions as a grown up that makes them bastard because one's birth is not under his control but his actions surely are. Like that Malfoy is a bastard for assaulting you though he was born innocent from a marriage. And Marriage? It is a divine commitment for me, Hermione my dear; it isn't a servitude or title. We take vows of love and faithfulness when we get married; we don't sign bonds of slavery. Only those who don't understand the real value and morale behind marriage try to use it to judge other people."

"Besides, who said that all children born from a married couple are kept?" Apolline added, "Do you think they are not aborted, Adeline?" she snorted loudly, "Ask me, I am a midwife for last twenty nine years. I have seen how many married couple have come and asked for abortion. And I have seen how many married couples have yearned to have a child. Let's not argue about that topic of marriage and abortion, Adeline, because they aren't remotely related. It's true that a child should have both of his or her parents to be well brought up but for me it isn't absolutely necessary. Jean has been an excellent mother to Adrian, Adeline. She has been his father and mother and there is no way Adrian could have had a better parent than her." she said proudly.

"I knew my daughter is the best in everything she does." Audré smiled down at Hermione, "So, what happened after you told Margot that you don't have a husband? Did she commit suicide out of heartbreak?"

"No, mum, she didn't." Hermione laughed feebly for the first time since Draco's entrance in Audré's memory, "She asked me if I was a Mudblood. I said I was and she went berserk at that. Cursed mother and father…said that they don't deserve to have Delacour residence because they have defiled it with an unmarried and pregnant Mudblood's presence. That is when father lost his temper and whipped out his wand. I have never seen him like that, mum; with one flick of his wand he Silenced Margot and was about to call the elves to pack her bag and throw her out of house when I had my first Cruciatus attack."

Draco, unable to hear anymore closed his ears again.

There was no way he was going to hear an account of that excruciating pain Hermione had to endure.

There was no way he was going to hear that.

No.

It was just as painful as Vincent's attack on Hermione only this time he had no means to take revenge on his dead aunt and himself for inflicting such pain on her.

He kept his eyes and ears closed tightly; he wasn't going to open then until it was over.

"…when I opened my eyes, mum, at first I thought I have died and went to heaven…" he slowly unplugged his ear passage and Hermione's words filtered in, "…It was a strange feeling…having no feeling…just staring at the ceiling and thinking that you are in heaven…" she said and Draco was reminded of the vacant look on Hermione's face when Healer Lili Sauvageau was examining her, "…I came back to my senses when a kind looking woman told me that my baby was well…that my son was doing fine…"

"Well what's wrong with that?" Audré asked Hermione, "Did you not want a son, Hermione?" she sounded slightly curious.

"To tell you the truth, mum. No." Hermione confessed and Draco shook his head in disbelief, "I always wanted a daughter first, a cute little daughter who will be my friend in the long run; like we were, mum, you and me. True that Adrian is an excellent son, mum, he never made me feel the absence of a daughter but my first priority at that time was a daughter; not a son."

"Son or daughter, Hermione, every child is a blessing for his or her parents." Audré said matter-of-factly, "At least that is what it should be. We shouldn't differentiate between them according to our own needs or liking for a specific gender; like some prefer to have a male child so that they can have an heir and some like you, who have been tortured my men, want to have a daughter. That's wrong. Son or daughter, Hermione, they are our children and we should love them unconditionally - just for being what they are. Not resent for what they could have been."

"I know, mum, I know." Hermione sighed, "I was just too fed up of men at that time. They are so disrespectful and piggish."

"Well you said Gustave wasn't." Audré reminded Hermione, "What about Alexis? Was he disrespectful and piggish too?"

"No!" Hermione exclaimed, "He is…I don't know to describe him mum…" Hermione frowned as if trying to find appropriate words, "Mother once told me that he is very reserve to women and he helped me when I thought I was going to have a miscarriage in my bathroom. True that I didn't believe in men after I was assaulted, I still don't, but Alexis somehow broke that image of men in my mind."

"How?" Audré asked the very question Draco was eager to ask her, "How did he do that?"

Hermione cast a shy glance at Apolline, "I apologize beforehand for what I am about to tell mum." She said as if confessing an embarrassing truth, "They are not words of an adulteress, they are mere facts."

"Carry on, Jean, this is a dream, not reality. We can have any conversation we like here." Apolline waved her hand indignantly, "Tell your mum what was it about my son that you broke your notion that all men are bad."

"He…Alexis…he is so different, mum." Hermione started again after gaining Apolline's approval, "He never says a word but don't be fooled by his silence because he watches you most carefully. His love is so silent and yet so deep: like an ocean without waves. It is like that Muggle song that I sing sometimes: 'when you said nothing at all'. Alexis is just like that song, mum; he speaks not through his lips but through his eyes. It is so amazing because I don't know how he does that. I just know that he is there, watching me, loving me, caring for me. There is this beautiful truth in his eyes that he'll never leave me. And his touch? They tell me that he'll catch me when I fall. Just like that song, mum, he is just like that song."

"Interesting!" Audré commented, "I never thought I'd see the day when my book worm daughter will talk to her mum about man and romantic song and no books." She winked playfully.

"Mum!" Hermione looked half-shy and half mortified, "You asked me about him."

"Of course, I did." Audré agreed, "Tell me more." She urged him.

"After I left Britain, mum, I never thought I'd be able to bring myself to be with any man other than Ron. I loved him, mum. Truly. It wasn't an infatuation or whim." Hermione said sincerely, "But my experiences with overall men were so bitter that I soon lost all kinds of interest in them. Only father and Alexis earned my trust through their love and dedication for me and Adrian but that certainly wasn't anything out of ordinary. I never considered Alexis anything more than a family. Besides, his reserve attitude and very little talking habit made me feel that he wasn't a very pleasant company compared to Ron who was always a jolly guy. So, when he proposed me the day we came back from Brussels, I was caught off guard."

Draco, though he knew that Hermione and Alexis were fiancé, hadn't heard Hermione's version on their short-term relationship that met its end the day she got married to him. Now that he was finally having an opportunity to know more, he hung on to Hermione's every single word.

"Alexis took me to mother's private parlour where we'd not be disturbed and before I knew what happened, he knelt before me." Hermione was saying, "He told me that ever since I came to live with them almost six years ago, he had been carrying a tender spot for me in his heart." He said that his feelings towards me towards me were not out of pity. He said that he admires me for my courage; for proving myself despite so many obstacles that were placed on my path. He said he also admires the wonderful boy I have produced, my Adrian and that there can be no greater honour for him than to be called his father."

Draco, who was already silent, was rendered speechless that how Hermione seemed to remember every single word of Alexis's proposal to her.

"To tell the truth, mum, I was shocked. I never thought, Alexis…the silent and watchful man, who was always so reserve, would propose me." Hermione's voice was earnest, "I asked him why he was proposing me all of a sudden and he said that he had thought I was in a relationship with my friend Edmound. But now that Gabrielle has told him about their relationship, he thought it was finally safe to ask for my hand in marriage."

"And what was your answer to him, Hermione?" Audré asked her.

"I said, I needed some time to think about it, mum." Hermione replied, "I mean I had no doubt about his feelings for me but I had doubts about a man's intention for woman who had a child. What if he didn't turn out to be the right guy to be Adrian's father? What if he lost interest in him after our marriage? What if I had more children with him and Adrian feels left out and abandoned with his step brothers or sisters? Besides, Adrian couldn't sleep without me at night. How was it possible that he slept alone if I went to sleep with my new husband? All these thoughts prevented me from giving him a positive answer, mum, I couldn't tell me yes right away. "

"That means that even with the claim that you considered Alexis as your family you couldn't accept him as your husband or more precisely as Adrian's father? Right?" Audré enquired.

"Maybe, mum, maybe." Hermione replied slowly, "Basically my heart wasn't ready for him so he didn't push me into anything. He isn't Malfoy, mum, he is Alexis."

"I know, dearest, I know. He wasn't Malfoy and he is Alexis." Audré commented gravely, "That brings me to the most important question I wanted to ask you." she said in such a serious tone that both Hermione and Draco frowned, "How are you, Hermione?"

"Me?" Hermione repeated, "I am…" she stopped midsentence, "I am stuck, mum, and I am tired." She replied after a while.

"Could you explain more fully, Hermione?" Audré offered, "I haven't been in your touch for a very long time."

"More fully?" Hermione's frown deepened, "I had some dreams, mum. Not very grand ones but they were my dreams. I always dreamt of a home… not a very big one…a small home…like we had… like those Scottish cottages that we saw in pictures…" her eyes became dreamy as she spoke, "…there will be a swing for children, like I had one; a garden in the front lawn and a piano in the sitting room where I will teach my children how to play them. I had a dream of a wedding, not a very grand one, a plain one but with the man I loved. I never wanted many things to be happy mum. I was contended with what I had. But…" she closed her eyes and tilted her head backwards, fresh streams of tears coming out from under her lids, "…but they were never fulfilled…even for small dreams, they were never fulfilled… I was…brutally raped by my own classmate…I was a virgin and he took away something that every woman considers precious…I became pregnant…my right to conceive my child with the man I loved was taken away from me…but I couldn't do anything to punish him…he was a Malfoy…mighty Malfoy…and they buy justice…" she opened her eyes and looked straight at Draco, who for was split second thought she could see him sitting there before her, "…I left my country and those I loved…came here so that I can save my child…the child that I haven't expected but somehow grown to love…the child that was innocent…" she gulped.

Draco, unbeknownst to himself, was crying now. With every word that escaped Hermione's lips a piece of his soul shattered and died.

"Do you know, mum that your daughter was indirectly called a prostitute?" Hermione asked Audré suddenly and Draco was reminded of the worst moment at the end of the second batch of memories that Apolline had given him, "It was never said directly but implied. Why? Because Alexis said if I didn't give the name of my child's father I'd be considered a prostitute by the Ministry. I asked him if I was to be prostitute for denying the esteemed name of my rapist what will happen to those men who go to them to buy forbidden pleasure. But he couldn't reply that day; no one could and I know that no one ever can." She shook her head firmly, looking like the ghost of Hermione that Draco adored, "Do you know, mum, what Margot said about me? She said that I was the kind of girls who hooked boys and bred like flies. I have never been more insulted in my entire life. I was a prostitute for not giving my rapist's name as Adrian's father. I was a hooker, a slut for not having a husband." she let out a derisive laugh, "Can you imagine that, mum, can you imagine that?" her eyes were pleading for an answer, "You said Malfoy was jealous of me and he tried to humiliate me by assaulting me. I can understand that he wanted to take revenge on me for besting him. But what were these people so jealous of? Was I an imminent threat to the Wizarding Empire they have built? And was I not a part that empire too? Have I not sacrificed everything for it?"

"Oh dear, oh dear!" Audré cried, "Oh my poor child!"

"You ask me how I am, mum?" Hermione asked Audré, overlooking her tears, "I am stuck in a marriage with the man who caused me every kind of pain imaginable. He and his traditional pureblood society humiliated me so much that it is a wonder that I am sane and alive; that my child is sane and alive. Had I given him five percent of what he gave me, mum, he would have gone mad and committed suicide." She said vehemently.

"No, no, no, love, don't say that." Audré was crying clutching Hermione protectively in her arms, "I knew my daughter would survive anything but I never knew she would survive so much."

"You ask me how I am?" Hermione was relentless in her tirade, "I say I am tired. I am tired of sacrificing and letting go of my dreams, mum. I was going to have my own home with the man I loved and Malfoy…it seems like he was born to hurt me the worst possible way…suddenly came and kidnapped my son…and I had no option but to marry him…marry my own rapist, mum, can you imagine that? Do you even understand what I sacrificed, mum?"

"I do, my love, I do." Audré replied, biting her lips.

"And now? The same society that tormented me for having a baby wants me to accept him as my husband. Do you think that's even possible?" Hermione held Audré tight and let out an agonizing cry, "Why? Because my Adrian is suffering. He wants a loving father. He wants a sibling like his friend Louis will have. And even with last fiber of my being, mum, I can't give him those. I just can't give him that. I can't accept the man who tortured me like that. I…just….can't…do…that…" she lost all coherent words.

Draco didn't know who cry was louder this time: Hermione's, his, Audré's or Apolline's. Inside Audré's head who was in turn inside Hermione's mind he hadn't expected to experience such whirlwind of emotions. He was a Malfoy – cold, arrogant and indifferent to other's emotions. But Hermione's words and actions had touched his cold heart in a way that he never imagined was possible. For the first time, in his life he realized that his aunt was right in saying that he didn't feel remorse for his actions; otherwise, how could he continue to hurt Hermione indirectly with his presence?

"Why is it that I have to live a life from compromise to compromise…from sacrifice to sacrifice…" inside Hermione's mind a sudden downpour started like the tear she shed, "…I sold the locket you gave me on my tenth birthday, mum, because I had no money to buy books for my school year…I sacrificed every worldly pleasure that was known to me…do you remember dad's favourite chocolate…Benedick's bittermints…I saw them one day when I was buying books from the money that I got from that locket…I wanted so much to buy a box…but they asked twenty five galleons a box and I had to let go of it…I told myself, 'Hermione, they are lying and cheating. Don't buy it from them. Don't waste your money.'…but no matter how hard I tried, mum…I just couldn't forget dad's face when I saw those chocolates…and I wanted them so badly…but I had no money to spend on them…"

Until then it never occurred to Draco that the memory of Hermione rejecting those chocolates could've hold any other meaning than patriotism. But now, that Hermione explained it, the meaning of that insignificant piece of memory was clear as daylight.

She has sacrificed slightest of pleasure for the sake of her child; even if it was some chocolates that were overprized.

And Draco? He has always got what he wanted no matter how expensive it was.

He never knew what sacrifice was.

"From chocolates to locket…from my home to my wedding…from my body to my soul to the men I loved: Ron and Alexis…everything was either taken away from me or I had to give them up…" the weather in Hermione's mind was becoming worse with thunderstorm, "…and now I am stuck with the man I hate with all of my existence, Draco Malfoy…Draco pureblood Malfoy…Draco rapist Malfoy…" a lightning flashed and the downpour intensified; under the tree all the occupants were soaked to the skin, "…he is completely opposite to the man I love, mum. He is proud, arrogant, lazy, extremely selfish, ignorant, manner less and above of all, lacks morale education. He is the worst possible candidate for someone's husband let alone someone's father. I tried so hard to bring Adrian up in a way that he never shows those traits but with Malfoy around him, I doubt even if it's possible. He is going to ruin my life's work, my Adrian…he is going to ruin everything again…everything that have built with hard work and patience…"

The rest of Hermione's words were lost in the storm as it grew stronger. Lightning flashed dangerously and howling wind tried to uproot the tree trunks that were shaking violently. In the midst of all these, three people sat under the tree, cramming against each other and praying silently for it to be over.

Hermione, Draco noticed after a while, had fainted. Her face, occasionally visible through flashes of lightening, looked gaunt and her body was limp in Audré's arms.

Draco wanted so much to take her in his arms and assure her that he'd never hurt her again; even if he had to die in the process. The emotional storm that he was having inside his own heart was no way less severe than the one that was happening inside Hermione's mind and maybe even worse.

"Is there any way you can stop the storm, Audré?" Apolline asked over the tumult of thunderstorm, "Any spell or incantation?"

"No." Audré shook her head, "There is no need to stop the storm, Apolline. Let it pour and be over."

"But it's hurting her!" Apolline protested, "This isn't a real storm, Audré, it's inside Jean's head; it's what her mind is going through." She looked at the violent storm around.

"I know, Apolline." Audré seemed nonchalant, "But have you noticed that the morning after the storm is always the freshest? So don't worry. We are going to wait here till it's over and then when it's safe, we will leave Jean's head." she said firmly.

Draco was having a foreboding feeling that the memory was about to end abruptly and so it happened. Before he had more a moment to gather his thoughts, his surroundings of thunderstorm in a dark and black forest vanished and there was nothing more to be watched.

He came out of his uncle's Pensieve in a state of frenzy: excruciating heartache, remorse, guilt, concern and alarm. Draco considered running to his aunt and ask her what had happened afterwards, if the storm had stopped indeed and how Hermione was now.

But that reminded him that the memory was given to help him find some answers; the answers that he had missed.

Now that Draco looked at the past three memories, he realized that he had never really understood what they really meant; he had just skimmed through the top layers leaving out the wealth of informations that here like dregs at the bottom.

He had been most superficial in the first batch, where he had screamed at Hermione for not eating properly. But now he understood; It wasn't based on her physical suffering; quite the contrary. It was the one that portrayed Hermione's love for the child that she hadn't expected. Her outbursts, her cries, her desperation were all signs of her love for Adrian. Then came the second batch with the most horrible of memories. Draco hadn't watched it more than once. For him they had meant her sufferings that were caused by him for leaving his son fatherless; but now he understood. Those memories were the mark of Hermione's remarkable strength and courage that she had shown on the face of extreme turmoil. And lastly it was the third batch: they were the proof of her sacrifices that she had made for Adrian.

In those three memories Hermione was a loving mother, a wonderfully strong woman and morally stable human being.

And what was he?

Draco frowned slightly as the answer finally dawned on him.

Hermione had been very generous on describing what Draco was for her. She had even implied it when she said what she sees in his eyes.

'A morale vacuum.' She had said, 'He is proud, arrogant, lazy, extremely selfish, ignorant, manner less and above of all, lacks morale education.'

And finally Draco knew what he was and he was up to on his way to Hermione.

TO BE CONTINUED IN NEXT CHAPTER…