In another life, I would be your girl. We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world. In another life, I would make you stay, so I don't have to say you were the one that got away." - Katy Perry

I usually don't like her songs, but this one just hit too close to home.

Oh Arnold!

Why is it always such a rollercoaster with you?

Then again, maybe it isn't: maybe that's just me and you just talk to me whenever you're bored. I don't know.

So I found out last time why you vanished so suddenly; apparently you were about to pass out from sleep and wanted to make sure you said goodbye to me. I'm not sure how much I believe that explanation but I guess I don't have much of a choice but to accept it. We talked some more after that, and it was playful and friendly, then you just stopped answering without saying bye this time. I knew you had to go to the movies, so I didn't feel too bad.

The true catastrophy happened last week, however; for once in my life, I, Helga G. Pataki, actually went to a party...with Curly and Eugene, ironically. Yeah, I know. Surprisingly, it was kind of fun. I took one shot that was offered to me despite my usual disgust of alcohol, but that was it. It didn't taste so bad. You won't see me chugging those down, however.

I told you some time ago about the fact that I didn't drink.

I wish I hadn't.

You see, I came home at 5 am that night with a huge stomach ache due to the terrible pizza place Eugene brought us to (I swear I am never again going there...AND THE MUSIC! It was like something from a nightmare! Horrible, cheesy 80's Italian music). So much for that place being "much better and healthier than McDonald's", dweeb!

Anyway, so I wasn't really in a very normal state of mind. As if that weren't enough, I could hear Big Bob and Miriam in their room; the two were somehow still awake and, unfortunately for me, they were fighting again, very loudly, might I add. Pricks.

SO, what hit me as a good idea at that moment? Why, to say hello to you, of course! I figured you were probably still asleep but, interestingly enough, you couldn't sleep (and you'd gone out yourself the day before). We talked for a bit and joked and what not...then I did the unthinkable.

I told you I missed you.

You read it and didn't respond for a few minutes. I was already half suffocating in fear by that point, so I quickly bid you goodnight and left. Too curious for my own good, I checked for an answer half an hour later.

You'd just wished me goodnight. No answer besides that. No "I miss you too", nothing.

I had nightmares all night. They were basically all about you. One of them was you responding to the message and saying that I should "calm down and not spout such nonsense, since it was already nice of you to even talk to me. You then blocked me before I could respond.

When I woke up from that one I jumped on Facebook to check if it had actually happened and was insanely relieved to see that it had just been my insane brain torturing me.

The second nightmare was with some lady predicting the future. Phoebe was in there; she accused me of being a bad friend for whatever reason. And then the lady turned into this demon as I explained that my love for you was my damnation. Dreamed of a bunch of other stuff, but forgot about it.

Anyway, so panicked me wrote to you the next morning saying that I didn't dare scroll up the convo and pretending as if I couldn't remember what I'd said. I asked if I had somehow embarrassed myself in any way and you reassured me by saying that I haven't. You asked me if I'd been drunk and I kind of gave you a vague answer, like how I didn't think I drank much but that I definitely wasn't feeling well. Now here's the thing, Arnold: are you really, really dense/naive, as I know you sometimes can be, or do you KNOW that what I'm saying is bullcrap. In other words, do you remember my previous claim of not drinking, and how much do you take my word on said matter?

Unfortunately for me, considering what you know of my home life, you probably place a reasonable weight on my no alcohol policy claim. On the bright side, whichever one of these explanations is the right one, at least you still talk to me and chose to conveniently ignore my previous foolishness.

But the thing is, Arnold, why did you ignore it? Is it because you don't miss me at all? Because you think it's pointless to respond since it might make things even harder for us considering that I'm far away? Or are you just being shy?

I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. I mean, you spoke to me after we conveniently chose to ignore me going completely insane and suicidal. We talked for like an hour or two and all seemed fine between us.

Thing is, I've written to you since then, you've read my messages...and still no answer. Nothing. I don't know what to make of it.

What I said...did it catch up to you after all?

Do you plan on never talking to me again?

I don't know what to do anymore. At the same time you make me so mad! I feel like lashing out at you like in the good old days when you ignore me like this. Like, I'm torn between tearing you down and asking you what in the world is wrong with you. Or maybe I should just ignore you completely and forget this whole ordeal.

Speaking of forgetting, Steven decided to cut ties with me. He says it's too difficult since he still has feelings for me and he knows it's not mutual. I wanted us to be friends but clearly that's too much to ask of him for now. Stupid sap. Who needs him anyway.

You know what? That. is. it.

I'm sick of this, and I'm sick of you poisoning my life.

Right now, you're far away and, really, if you think about it, that's the entire problem. It needs to be fixed.

My decision is made.

Somehow, someday, you and I are gonna be reunited and work things out. I just need to figure out how and when.

I'll win you back, my Love, you'll see. It's just a matter of time.

With fierce passion,

Helga G. Pataki

Hope you guys like the new update! Sorry for taking so long and I must say, I'm impressed and really touched by all of the comments, follows and favorites. You guys are the best :3 Feel free to share your impressions of the story so far as well as what you think will happen, and what you'd like to see, etc. Remember, all reviews are read and taken into consideration! - CB~