Chapter 32 The Great Escape
Kate Beckett gnawed on her bottom lip as she mentally prepared herself for the upcoming conversation that she needed to have. She played out scenarios in her head, contemplating her choice of words carefully.
Kate was never good at ending things. She hated breakups and the inevitable tension that they caused.
Well, technically it wasn't a breakup since they were never officially a couple in the first place. It was flirting, a kiss, and a few dates, but it would be wrong to keep him on the hook if she wasn't willing to pursue something further. The back and forth had gone on long enough and it was time that she put an end to things.
It was a little past three o'clock on Friday afternoon. Usually it would be a few hours before quitting time for most of the detectives who worked the day shift, but many had plans to head out of town for Fourth of July festivities.
After Castle had given her the ultimatum earlier that afternoon, she had some time to think over his proposition and she had finally come to a decision. She just had to have a conversation with a certain individual before her conscience could be clear.
After getting permission to clock out early, Beckett collected her belongings and descended a floor to the robbery division and scanned the desks. She caught sight of Demming at his desk where he appeared to be getting ready to leave too.
She waited by the elevator lobby, hoping to intercept him during his exit. He noticed her presence as he was heading to the elevator and approached her.
"Hey Beckett," Demming greeted. "You waiting for someone?"
He noted her coat in hand and satchel slung over her shoulder. Other cops slowly filed out of the main area passing them by, the precinct populace slowly dwindling.
"Yeah, I was waiting for you actually" she stated.
"Oh," Demming said pleasantly surprised. "Would you like to have dinner with me? I would really enjoy your company." He smiled with an enticing grin.
Even though Beckett had said that she would tell him if she wanted to start something more, Demming never shied away from an opportunity to try to make that happen sooner than later.
"I already have some other plans later actually," Kate replied.
"Oh, that's okay. Another time then," Demming offered casually.
"Actually, I don't think that would be a good idea," Beckett started cautiously.
"What do you mean?" he questioned. Confusion crossed his face as he searched for the meaning behind her words.
Beckett looked him squarely in the eyes and explained.
"I know I said that I would let you know if I was ready to start dating again, but I don't think that will be anytime soon."
She saw his face fall upon hearing yet another rejection.
"I thought… we had something between us," he tried.
They had gone out to dinner a few times even though she said she wasn't looking for anything. Despite her giving mixed signals, they both seemed to enjoy spending time with each other, or so he thought. That's why Demming kept pursuing her.
Kate looked at him with a soft sympathy in her eyes and continued.
"It's not that I wasn't interested…" she bit her lip. "I'm just not in a place to be starting something with someone new. And it doesn't seem fair to keep you waiting on me."
Demming suspected there was more than she was letting onto, but he didn't have the grounds to pry further.
"Shouldn't that be for me to decide?" he posited.
Beckett considered his statement. "Well I guess it is…" she conceded. "I just don't want to continue to lead you on. This is where I'm at and you have to accept that."
She was trying to do him a favor by letting him know that she was unavailable rather than allowing him to continue to pursue her with false hope.
"So what exactly are you saying?"
"That… you should move on. Consider my answer a 'no,'" she said resolutely.
"I see," Demming said quietly. He understood her position even though he felt like she wasn't telling him the whole story. Demming had to accept her answer regardless.
"Sorry for how things turned out…" Beckett offered apologetically.
He sighed. "I understand. If you're not ready, you're not ready. I can't change that as much as I'd like to."
"Don't let this deter you from any other endeavors."
"Oh, I won't. And you never know what might happen in the future…"
"Always optimistic, huh?" she offered a small smile.
"It's a good principle to follow. Well uh… I guess I'll see you around then Kate."
"Yeah I'll see you. Good night."
"Night."
They parted ways separately and left the precinct for the weekend.
That had gone better than she expected. No arguments or fighting. No hard feelings really, much unlike her disastrous breakup with Castle. Demming really was a great guy but her heart was never really with him. Whenever she was with him, she was always thinking about Castle or trying not to. If it weren't for him, she and Demming may have had a different future.
She felt like this was the right thing to do, however. Kate shouldn't have even been flirting with another guy while Castle was away, much less semi-date him right after he had come back and they had broken up. She could see now the insensitivity of her actions and how Castle must have felt. She hurt him on purpose in an immature attempt to protect herself. That's why she needed to fix things with Castle, starting with this trip.
Kate shrugged the thoughts of Demming away and focused on the next task at hand: packing.
Kate headed home to prepare for the impromptu Hamptons getaway with Castle. She didn't know what was going to happen on this trip, but she knew it was something they both needed direly. They needed to mend the brokenness of their relationship. She needed to apologize and make it up to him, somehow.
Back at her apartment, Kate perused her closet for things to bring to the Hamptons. Shorts, swimsuits, sun dresses. It was the perfect occasion to don the summer clothes that she seldom got to wear.
Half an hour later, her suitcase was expertly packed, filled with a week's worth of clothes, toiletries, and beauty products. She was starting to get a little excited about the trip. It had been ages since she last took a vacation, which is why the Captain was willing to give her the time off on such short notice.
A short drive later, Kate was at Rick's apartment building, ascending via elevator to the top floor where his loft was located. She had called Alexis to inform her that she was stopping by because she needed to speak with Castle's daughter too. Kate owed her both an apology and an explanation for her intentions with her dad.
When Kate knocked on the door, she was quickly met by Alexis who had been reading a book in the living room.
"Detective Beckett." Alexis greeted with overt formality.
"Hey Alexis, thanks for agreeing to see me." Kate stepped across the threshold and followed Alexis back to the living room couches.
Alexis reoccupied her spot on the long sofa and Kate sat on the next seat over. She placed a bookmark into her book and set it on the table, turning her attention to the detective.
"So why did you want to come over again?" Alexis questioned.
"Well I came here to apologize to your dad and try to make it up to him like you said," she explained. "But I have to apologize to you too."
Alexis raised her eyebrow.
Kate let out a sigh and began. "I betrayed your trust by hurting your dad. I didn't fully appreciate your hospitality."
Alexis considered her statements thoughtfully. "Well you did take care of me while my dad was away in Europe…" she conceded.
"I took both of you for granted though," Kate admitted. "What I had when I was here. You guys made me feel so welcome and I just distanced myself after your dad came back. I'm sorry for the way I treated both of you and for taking your kindness and hospitality for granted. I'm really sorry for how I hurt your dad Alexis… and if I hurt you too."
Alexis paused for a moment to think. Looking over her earnest face, Alexis saw how contrite Kate was.
"I forgive you Kate," she said quietly, "but you have to fix things with my dad. You know I hate seeing him miserable like this…"
"I know and it kills me that I'm the one who caused all his pain. I promise I'll make it up to him. I can't guarantee that we'll be as good as we were before, but we're going to fix things and at least be partners and friends again somehow," Kate promised hopefully.
"How are you going to do that?"
"Well I'm not sure exactly, but we're going away to the Hamptons together for a fresh start."
"Oh really?" Her dad hadn't mentioned that it was Kate who was going with him for his usual Hamptons summer excursion.
"Yeah, your dad asked me to go with him. Just as friends." Kate quickly qualified.
"That's good. I didn't want him to be all alone. I usually go with him to celebrate the Fourth of July, but I have an orientation program to attend this summer." She knew that her dad really missed being with Kate and maybe this trip would be a chance for them to make up.
Kate took a moment to think over the indeterminate state of their complicated relationship. "I think we both need the time to be honest with each other and find our way again…"
"I hope everything turns out well," Alexis expressed genuinely. "For the record, I really did think you were good for him. You made him so happy when you were together Kate. More than you know."
Alexis' words touched her heart. "You know, I really liked spending time with you too while I stayed here. I loved being a part of your little family while I was here…" she acknowledged wishfully.
"It was nice having you around Kate. Good luck with my dad. Please don't hurt him again."
"I won't, I promise. Thank you for everything, Alexis." She leaned over and embraced the girl in a warm hug. Alexis returned the affection.
"Where is he now?" Kate asked after they pulled apart.
"In his office, writing." Alexis pointed to his office door, which was closed per his norm for when he was in serious writing mode. "You can knock."
"Okay, thanks."
Kate got up and headed toward the door. She rapped three times softly and listened for a response.
"You can come in Lex," Rick answered from inside, assuming it was Alexis at the door.
Kate turned the handle and slipped in. The room was dimly lit by a desk lamp, which illuminated his workspace and offered a soft glow to the room. Rick sat at his stained mahogany desk in front of the large photograph of a grand spiral staircase. He was dressed in comfortable loungewear, relaxed but focused intently on his writing.
Rick was busy typing away on his computer and didn't bother to look up at the guest. Kate watched him for a moment, fascinated by the sight of him in his writing zone.
"Hey, it's me," she greeted.
Her voice instantly pulled him out of his fictional universe back into his own office. He eyed her up and down, watchfully observing her demeanor. She appeared calm and unaffected, poised as always.
Kate looked at him intently, a bit hesitant with her words. Their eyes were locked on each other's, both waiting for what would happen next with bated breath.
"Hey," he echoed carefully. Kate's presence at his home surprised him, since she hadn't called or texted beforehand.
"Uhh, what are you doing here?" Rick inquired apprehensively.
He had given her the choice of going with him to the Hamptons or forfeiting their partnership for good just a couple of hours ago. If she made a decision that quickly, it couldn't be good.
She reached into her pocket and produced the post-it he had given her just hours before. "I'm here to fulfill your super dare," she declared.
It took him a moment to process what she was saying. He didn't make a move from his desk and Kate raised an eyebrow at him.
"So you coming or what?" Kate asked.
When it finally registered in his mind, a wide grin spread across his face. "I'll get my bags."
Throw it away, forget yesterday
We'll make the great escape
A/N: Yay, Hamptons trip! Time to let the healing begin.