Well. Felix wasn't going to lie to himself. He'd had a great time with Tamora last night. And if he was being completely honest, he was sad to see it end. Her tough exterior loosened itself ever so slightly as their date pressed on, revealing an almost undetectable sweetness there. He caught glimpses of it when she talked about her job, when she laughed at her own jokes, when she ate the lint-covered, half-melted chocolate she'd stuck in her pocket—and sometimes, he could see that beautiful glow within her when she was looking right at him.

But when he thought of Tamora, a nagging guilt always seemed to creep its way into his thoughts and shift his attention over to something—someone—else. How could he ever—ever—have expected Turbo to come back into his life, without warning, the way he did? No one had expected that to happen, least of all him. It was something he never could've prepared himself for, and he had absolutely no clue how to sort this all out in his head.

But he did know one thing for certain. He was incredibly confused.

What he needed to do, he told himself, was talk to someone. Someone he could trust, someone who wouldn't blab to everyone else what was going on with him. Most of all, he needed somebody who'd give him an honest opinion, whether it hurt his feelings or not.

After work that day, he made his way over to the newly-built apartment block just south of his own complex. He rang the door with a shaking hand.

Loud, impeding footsteps could be heard from within the house. The door swung open, revealing a very tall, very brawny man in tattered overalls and a threadbare button-up shirt. He had to crane his head very far downward to be able to see his company.

"Oh, hey, Felix," Ralph said, unable to mask his mild surprise at his visitor.

"Hi, there, Ralph," Felix began. He wrung his hands together as he craned his neck up at the towering figure. "Now, this…may sound a little strange, but—"

He paused. Ralph had a somewhat confused look on his face. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all, Felix thought to himself.

Felix sighed. He spread his hands, palms up, in defeat. "Well, Ralph, I know we haven't exactly been that good of buddies for very long…but I'm here to ask you for some advice."

Ralph blanched. "Advice?" He chuckled under his breath. He leaned against the doorframe. "I dunno much about me giving advice. I mean, I could try, but I'm probably not gonna be much help. Might hafta ask one of the Nicelanders for their, ah…input."

Felix could feel a line of sweat beading around the top of his forehead. "See, that's…the thing. I'd really like it if the Nicelanders, kind of…didn't hear about this." Felix's face screwed up into a grimace.

For a second, Ralph's face remained blank. Then it slowly crept into a face-splitting smile. "Ah, Felix, you need some advice about romance, huh?" He waggled his eyebrows. "I could tell you a couple tips. Ol Ralph here may not look like much, but I been around the block a few times."

"I'm needing some…relationship advice," Felix admitted. "And since you've, uh…been around the block, as you put it, maybe you'll be able to help me out."

"Yeah, ya never know," Ralph said, grinning. "Hey, why don'tcha come on inside, we're letting all the cool air out standing here with the door open, anyway." Ralph detached himself from the doorway and ushered Felix into his apartment. With slightly trembling legs, Felix obeyed.

Once inside, Felix made a mental note to help Ralph out with his decorating. Aside from some essential furniture pieces, and a lone book on the bookshelf, the place was depressingly bare. Felix was overcome with a strage sense of loneliness at the sight of it.

"Make yourself at home," Ralph offered. "Actually, that's still something I'm working on, if you can't tell. I'm, uh, not much of a decorator."

"I think it looks just fine, Ralph," Felix half-lied. He eyed a sofa in what was apparently the living room. He allowed himself to drift over and have a seat.

Ralph plopped down in the armchair opposite Felix, which he didn't quite fit in; his large frame completely dwarfed the small piece of furniture. "So what's on your mind?" Ralph said, shifting around uncomfortably in the chair.

Felix's hand floated to the back of his neck. "I don't even know where to start, to be honest."

"Well, are you having some problems, or…?"

"Definitely problems," Felix nodded. "I guess you could say I'm…well, there are two people I've been granting my affections to, here lately, and I know I ought to pick just the one…but I don't know who—"

Ralph raised a hand up to shush him. "Say no more. I know exactly what you're going through."

"Y…you do?" Felix blinked.

"Oh, yeah. The classic love triangle! You see it all the time."

Felix thought for a moment. "I suppose you could say I am in a…" He mumbled the rest. "Love triangle."

"Just outta curiosity," Ralph said with a grin. "Who might you be in this little triangle with, huh?"

Felix bit his lip.

"One of them's a given," Ralph went on. "One's definitely Calhoun. You had a date with her last night, didn't you?"

"I did." It wasn't exactly a secret, so no surprise there.

"And so, there's one other person besides her, huh?"

"That would…seem to be the case." Felix was fighting the urge not to pull his shirt collar away from his neck and fan himself. He'd figured this was going to be an embarrassing ordeal, but he wasn't expecting to get this flustered talking about the mess that passed for his love life.

"C'mon, you can tell me who it is. I can keep a secret, you know me."

"Oh, I'd really, ah, rather not, Ralph," Felix stammered.

"I won't tell a soul. Cross my heart." With a large index finger, Ralph made an X motion across his chest.

"I can't."

"Well, how're you gonna expect to be with this person if you can't even tell me their name?" Ralph said matter-of-factly. "You can't keep em a secret forever."

This realization hit Felix like a falling brick from his game. His eyes widened.

"Well, if you're not gonna tell me, that's all right, I guess," Ralph shrugged. "Anyway, Calhoun's a really awesome lady. I mean, she's a little rough around the edges, but hey."

"She is pretty awesome, isn't she?" Felix mused.

"How'd your date go, the one you had the other night?"

"It was just wonderful," Felix sighed. The honey glows crept into his cheeks. "I know Tapper's isn't the most dignified place to take your date, but I had a hunch she would like it. And I think I was correct."

"Didja kiss her when you took her home?"

The honey glows were getting warmer. "Oh, just a peck on the cheek."

"Okay, and what about the last time you went on a date with, uh, this other person, whoever they are? When the date was over, did you kiss them?"

Going into a dungeon cell while the other person had to be bound at ankles and wrists could hardly be called a date, but Felix would have to pretend it was.

Felix thought for a moment. "A-actually…" The memory of he and Turbo's kiss surfaced in his mind, and just the thought of it was enough for his breath to hitch. That means he had…he had…

"We did kiss," he said simply.

"You and that other person?" Ralph asked, to clarify. Felix nodded. "And what was that one like? Different?"

"Magical," Felix said. Magical? He wished he could take the word back and replace it with something less…stupid. But it was too late now.

Ralph nodded, his brow furrowed and the corners of his mouth turned down, deep in thought. "You know, it'd really help me out if you'd just tell me who the other person is."

One of Felix's weaknesses was that he felt the need to tell the truth all the time, and he also thought he should be as honest as he could, without hurting the other party's feelings. Something nagged within him, screaming, just go ahead and tell him! But he didn't know what would become of it. Word traveled fast in Niceland. Very fast. He didn't want to spread the news that he was horribly attracted to a psychopath all around his game. It'd be a pure nightmare.

Then again…Ralph was a Bad Guy, but he wasn't a bad guy. He wouldn't tell anyone.

"Okay," Felix started slowly. "I'll tell you who it is. But you've got to promise me something."

"What've I got to promise you?"

"You will not tell anyone. I'm sorry, but I'm sort of wanting to keep this out of the books, if you know what I mean, for as long as I can possibly manage. I can just imagine the Nicelanders' faces when they figure out who else I'm…interested in."

"That bad, huh?" Ralph said. "Well, I can be the judge of that. Lay it on me. Who's the mystery date?"

Felix took a huge breath. "You're not even going to believe me when I tell you," he said. Was it getting really hot in there, or was it just him? "So just…please know that I am being completely serious when I say this."

"Got it."

Felix averted his eyes. Suddenly, the little square of light the window was letting through to the floor was very interesting indeed.

"I'm…it's…" He whispered the name. "Turbo."

Ralph's back went rigid in his chair. You could've heard a pixel drop, the silence was so horrible and deafening. Felix tried to swallow, but he didn't have enough moisture in his mouth to do so.

"Turbo?" Ralph said, his face somewhere between a mixture of shock and displeasure. "As in, the Turbo? As in, lock him up and throw away the key, Turbo?"

"T-the very same," Felix stuttered.

"How? No, not how. Why?" Ralph threw his huge hands in the air. "How could you possibly see anything even remotely redeemable in that guy?"

"Well, he—"

"He's a psycho!" Ralph said. "A grade-A basket case! He lost all his marbles a long time ago."

"I-I'd have to agree with you on that, to an extent," Felix said gently. "But just…hear me out. There's a lot more to him than just…missing a few of his marbles."

"I'm listening," Ralph said slowly. It was obvious he was a little more than skeptical.

"Okay, well, for starters…" Felix steeled himself as best he could for what he was about to say next.

{*}

"I got nothin," Turbo sighed, splaying his cards on the table.

"Pair of sevens," Felix beamed.

"Oh-ho, pair of queens!" Axel said, slapping down his hand. "I've got both of you beat. Rally, whaddya got?"

"Read em and weep," Rally said proudly, displaying an eight, nine, ten, Jack, and Queen of diamonds. A smug look graced his face.

"What?" Axel exclaimed. "How'dja manage that?"

"A straight flush?!" Turbo spat, crossing his arms. "You cheated."

"Wait, so if they're all the same color, it's called a what?" Felix asked. He'd never played a hand of poker in his life before that night, and he really didn't care if he won or lost—he was mainly trying to learn all the rules.

"Not if they're the same color, if they're the same suit," Turbo said, biting back a smile. "They're all diamonds, see."

Felix scratched at his head. "Alright, I…well, I think I get it."

"I believe this belongs to me," Rally said proudly, raking the ante toward him, licking his lips. They were all using Oreos as poker chips. Felix and Turbo were both losing pretty equally, and the recent hand put Rally a fair ways ahead.

"Looks like we're going to bed hungry tonight, huh?" Turbo said to Felix, pursing his lips.

"It's okay, I don't mind losing," Felix said, flapping his hand. Turbo couldn't help but smile at him a little. Of course he didn't mind losing, he was too damn sweet to—

"Aw, look at our little bro, Rally," Axel said, wiping away an imaginary tear from his eye. "Finally caring about someone other than himself."

"Get a load of that dreamy look in his eye," Rally replied.

The twins sighed dramatically, staring at Felix in a way that made him just a little uncomfortable.

"Both a you can just shut the hell up," Turbo said hotly, crossing his arms. He grinned at Felix. "They're just jealous. These two couldn't get a date if they held somebody at gunpoint." Felix bit his lower lip to keep from smiling, a hint of a laugh escaping through his nostrils.

"That may be true," Rally said. "But who has the most Oreos, here?" He took one of said poker chips between his thumb and index finger and bit it in half. "Is it you…? Oh, wait, it's me."

"I was getting kinda tired of this game, anyways," Turbo said, pushing his chair away from the table. Felix followed suit.

"Just so ya know, Felix m'dear," Axel said, "he always quits when he's losing."

"Do not," Turbo said, giving his brother a please stop talking look. The twins snickered to themselves.

He led the way over to the front door. "Actually, I was kinda hoping I'd have time to show you somethin. Y'know, before you have to go back to your game?"

"Oo-ooh—" the twins hummed collectively.

"Shut the f—" Turbo cut his swear off for the sake of the virgin-eared handyman standing beside him. "Please don't do this right now. I will kill you in your sleep tonight, I swear I will."

Rally tried to stifle his giggles, but they hissed out of his mouth anyway. Axel dismissed them with a wave. "Behave yourself," he warned.

"Let's get outta here," Turbo said, shooting his brothers death glares as he guided Felix out the door.

The two of them stepped out into the humid night. Lightning bugs blinked through the otherwise dark air, a muggy breeze sticking to their skin. Turbo reached a hand out, for a fleeting moment thinking that it might be a good idea to grab onto Felix's, but yanked it back after a nanosecond of thought. His palm was sweaty anyway, he told himself.

"It's not far, we can just walk," he said to Felix, who was looking a little on the confused side.

"Where are we going?"

Turbo smirked. "Nope, not telling you, it's a surprise. You'll see."

"Surprises make me nervous…"

"It's nothing bad, promise." Turbo started forward.

Felix had every right to be a slight bit nervous. After all, everybody knew if you died outside your game, you didn't regenerate. For all he knew, Turbo could be carting him off somewhere to slit his throat. It was a highly unlikely theory, but a possible one, nonetheless. He took a breath and followed Turbo's lead.

The two walked side-by-side, the only sounds being the soft buzzing of bugs, the scuffling of feet on grass, and the plink-plink-plink of Felix's golden hammer swaying in his belt loop. It was unnerving. Luckily, though, they weren't far from where they were going.

The ground they walked on lifted in a steady incline, and plateaued at a place Felix had been before.

"The main racetrack?" Felix said, raising an eyebrow. "I-I mean, not that there's anything wrong with that, I just—"

"Well, sorta," Turbo interjected. "C'mon, though, I wanna show you something rad."

He led them off to the far right, and it quickly became apparent that they were headed toward the stadium bleachers. Felix felt his heartrate quicken. They were either going to go up the steps, or underneath the structure—a dark place perfect for murder. He breathed a quiet sigh of relief as Turbo climbed the steps, where he was happy to follow.

"We're goin to the top," Turbo said as he climbed the bleachers.

"Oh…kay," Felix said, sticking his arms out to his side to keep his balance.

As they climbed, Turbo kept turning his head round to make sure Felix was still following him. It looked like the handyman was having some technical difficulties climbing the unsteady bleacher boards. Turbo stopped to let him catch up, grabbing him by the wrists when he was within reach.

"Yeah, they take some getting used to, huh," Turbo said as he guided him up the last three rows. He was climbing them backward now, how he was managing that, Felix would never know.

"It's a tiny bit wobbly," Felix admitted. "And, uh…high-up."

"'High-up' is why we're here," Turbo said. He sat down on the highest bleacher and motioned for Felix to do the same.

"Check it out," Turbo said, pointing straight outward.

Felix gasped.

"Oh my land…"

The glass double doors and floor-to-ceiling windows of Litwak's arcade were in perfect view. In the Player's World, strings of red and green lights wound around the streetlights, glowing proudly in the darkness. Strange white stuff, which Turbo had heard one of the players refer to as "snow," drifted down from the out-of-game sky in lazy puffs.

"Why, you can see the whole outside of the arcade from here!" Felix exclaimed. "I can only see about half of it from my game, and even then…my penthouse is up too high for this kind of view."

"Innit great?" Turbo said.

"Of course!" Felix said. "Though I wonder what those white things are, must be some kind of…strange weather they have out there, I guess. And those lights…they must be having some kind of festivities."

"No telling," Turbo shrugged. "Kinda cool, though."

"Very…cool." Felix beamed.

Turbo tried again to screw his courage to the sticking point, reaching for Felix's hand. This time, he did it. It wasn't what he'd expected; he sort of forgot the fact that Felix was wearing thick work gloves. Felix smiled and gave his hand a gentle squeeze anyhow.

"Hey, next time, you should show me this penthouse of yours," Turbo said. "I wanna see what that's all about."

He felt Felix's hand stiffen underneath his own. The happy expression melted away from Felix's face as quickly as it had appeared.

"What's the matter?"

"Uh, see, there's…" Felix stammered. "Oh, how to explain…"

Felix pondered the thought for a few seconds. "The only other characters in your game, besides you, are your brothers, right?"

"Don't forget the cardboard cutouts," Turbo said, motioning toward the other half of the bleachers, where humanoid shapes were propped up, smiling and lifeless.

"Well, back in my game, I live in an apartment building, as you know, but I live there with others. Twenty-six others, to be exact."

"Yeah, and?"

"And, they're very overprotective of me, me being the Good Guy and all." Felix said. "Very overprotective."

"What, they're gonna hack my head off if they see me with you?" Turbo smirked.

"Not exactly," Felix said, taking his free hand and fidgeting with the hammer at his side. "It's just…they'll be so…so cross with me."

"Why, though?"

"They just will be, trust me," Felix said sadly.

"Sound like they need to get over themselves," Turbo said.

"Oh, they mean well," Felix sighed. "And they'd do anything in the world for me, but a lot of the time it's like I've—well, like I've got twenty-six moms and dads."

"Yikes."

"Exactly."

"Well, if it's that big of a deal to ya," Turbo said, "just forget about it, then. No harm, no foul. There's lots of other places to hang out. And obviously my brothers like you." He rolled his eyes. "So we can always come back here."

"I've just got to warm the Nicelanders up to the idea of you, first, is all," Felix insisted.

"Don't worry about it, I said."

"But I have a pool on my roof."

Turbo raised his eyebrows. "Okay, worry about it a little," he said, giving Felix's hand a reassuring squeeze.

{*}

"And so you never told anybody that Turbo was your…" Ralph tried to think of a better word, but couldn't. "Boyfriend."

Felix shook his head. "Not until now."

"I'm the only one that knows."

"That's right." Felix swallowed.

Ralph's mouth was agape. "How long did you…how long were you guys together?"

Felix thought. "About a year, I guess, but then he, uh…"

"Went Turbo?"

Felix winced a little at the harsh comment. "Yes."

Ralph's face was stuck in perpetual surprise. "I really just can't believe—this isn't a joke, it it? You're being serious right now?"

"Ralph! Of course I'm being serious! I would never joke about something like this."

"Yeah, I guess you wouldn't," Ralph nodded. "I just…I'll be honest, I just can't picture it. You know. You two."

"That's what I expected you to say," Felix nodded. "But now do you see my problem? All this time, I thought Turbo was…dead. I mean, I had hope, but I never really thought…" He shrugged. "And I finally got the bees out of my bonnet and went down to the dungeon in Sugar Rush to visit him, and…"

Ralph quirked an eyebrow. "Lemme guess, you still love him."

Felix said nothing. The honey glows were setting his face afire.

"I have no idea what you see in him, but it is what it is, I guess," Ralph said, locking his hands behind his head. "Now you're telling me you've got a choice to make."

"That's exactly right," Felix said, finding his voice to reply. "And I have no idea what to do. I'm hopeless." He hid his face in his hands, groaning.

Ralph scrunched his face in thought. "Okay, let me ask you this."

Felix uncovered his face. "Yes?"

"Was he good to you?"

Immediately Felix wished he'd never lifted his head up. He wanted to hide somewhere forever. "Yes, he was very good to me."

"He wasn't an asshole to you, like he is to everybody else?"

"He's not an—he just has his ways," Felix said.

"Yep, I can definitely tell you're still in love with him," Ralph grinned. "That's the only way anybody would stick up for that jerkbag. But seriously, though, did he ever yell at you?"

"Not a single time."

"Hit you?"

"No!" Felix crossed his arms.

"Was he mean to you in any way, shape, or form? Tell me straight, it's just you and me here, remember."

"Honestly, Ralph, he was very nice and very well-behaved. In fact, it was…it was me who wanted to keep our, ah…relationship, I suppose you'd call it…a secret. Not him. You would've known him a lot better, if it wasn't for my silliness."

Ralph stroked his chin in thought. "And obviously Calhoun doesn't beat up on you, you're definitely in one piece, I see," he said. "So they're on pretty equal playing ground there. Honestly, buddy, I think it's gonna come down to your own personal preference, not any kind of advice somebody gives you."

"I know," Felix groaned. He felt of his cheeks. Very hot. "Who would you pick, Ralph? If you were me."

"Need I remind you that Turbo tried to murder me, and very nearly succeeded," Ralph said. "So I think you know who I'd pick. But it's not about me, I don't have to look at his ugly mug. It's all you."

He's not ugly, Felix thought feebly. Oh, he had a headache something awful.

"Would you hate me if I…" But Felix couldn't finish what he'd had in mind to say.

"Picked Turbo over Calhoun?" Ralph said. "Nah, I wouldn't hate you. Question your taste in characters, maybe, but I wouldn't hate you."

"And you'd let him come visit Niceland without punching him to a bloody pulp?" Felix asked, wincing.

"I guess if I have to," Ralph grinned. "And it kinda sounds like you've decided who you wanna be with, buddy."

Lost in his fantasy of everything finally righting itself, Felix had sort of forgotten about Tamora. Again. He was ashamed of that. He scowled at himself.

"But Ralph, Tamora is so…she's just a real dynamite gal, all-around," Felix said. "She's strong, she's beautiful, she can be so nice and caring when she wants to be, she loves to go out and have fun, and…and nobody judges me when I'm with her."

Ralph took all of this in, nodding. "I'm not gonna lie to you, that's a tough one. And I don't wanna sway you one way or the other. This is a decision you have to make for yourself, like I said. And just keep in mind you don't have to make a decision by tomorrow, or anything.

My only solid piece of advice to you is this: don't rush the decision. Go on another date with Tamora, have some fun with her, go and…whatever you'd do with Turbo. Just test the waters a little bit."

"That's what you would do?"

Ralph sighed. "That is what I would do. Now, I know that's not that good of advice, but—"

"No, that's great advice," Felix said, standing up. "It really is. And you are exactly right about not rushing this decision. It is a pretty important one, huh?"

"Definitely," Ralph said, clambering out of the tiny armchair. "No need to rush it, they'll get over it." The entire floor shook as Ralph crossed the apartment to open up the door. "Hey, good luck, all right? And, uh, keep me updated."

"I will."

Felix descended the apartment steps, saying his goodbyes to Ralph and thanking him again for the chat. It had been great to talk to someone about his troubles, and in a way, it felt like a weight had been lifted from him. Now that another soul knew about his situation, it didn't feel nearly as suffocating. And he supposed Ralph wouldn't mind if he came to him again to talk. He and the wrecker had become closer as of late. He made his way down the sidewalk home with his head held a little higher. Maybe this strange affair he'd found himself in wasn't so hopeless after all.

Maybe he really did need to just give it some time.

Author's Note: Long chapter! I couldn't find a good place to cut this one off, so away it went. And also, I feel like I should apologize for my writing being so chatty, like I try to back up afterward and put some good details about the setting in there, but mostly it's just characters talking...? Oops. Anyway, yall are awesome, and thank you so much for reading!