10:05am
ApproachWithCaution: hey random
10:16am
ApproachWithCaution: no comments, okay
10:18am
ApproachWithCaution: this was getting a little weird anyway
10:22am
ApproachWithCaution: I had to tell Hermione who I was texting, she says you're probably either a murderer or a pervert. She worries for my safety.
...
11:02am
NotHermione: I apologies for not responding earlier, I was extracting a tumor from an elderly man's liver.
11:04am
NotHermione: and I can assure you, and your friend, that I am not either of those things.
11:15am
ApproachWithCaution: well that's a relief. It would've been very awkward if I'd been texting a criminal.
11:21am
NotHermione: it would, I trust you are similarly inexperienced?
11:23am
ApproachWithCaution: I think you just asked me if I was a wanted man, but I honest cannot tell.
11:24am
NotHermione: that would be it, yes
11:26am
ApproachWithCaution: I am in the secret service y'know?
11:29am
NotHermione: simply covering all my bases my friend. Gotta check
11:32am
ApproachWithCaution: But if I was a crazy ass psychopath, why wouldn't I just lie?
11:34am
NotHermione: I have faith in you
11:36am
NotHermione: or at least in the fact that your not a homicidal maniac.
11:38am
NotHermione: not a lot of faith, but its there
11:40am
ApproachWithCaution: that's comforting; at least one person in the world has faith in me, thank you
11:42am
NotHermione: your welcome
11:44am
NotHermione: I have to run, someone just fainted
11:46am
ApproachWithCaution: kk, go save people. Have fun.
...
ApproachWithCaution: dude, what if we started off with cupcakes and they just kept getting bigger until they just began CAKES? LIKE AMERICA?
NotHermione: it is literally 3am, what is wrong with you?
ApproachWithCaution: I'm serious. What. About. America?
NotHermione: I have no idea and it's still 3am
ApproachWithCaution: gee, what bee is in your bonnet?
NotHermione: IT. IS. THREE. AM.
ApproachWithCaution: well, yeah, what are you doing up anyway?
NotHermione: I just got off work
ApproachWithCaution: but you were working this morning.
ApproachWithCaution: Jesus
ApproachWithCaution: sleep, sleep now
NotHermione: yeah, that sounds nice
ApproachWithCaution: I'm gonna stop bothering you now
ApproachWithCaution: I'm am so sorry
ApproachWithCaution: god bless
ApproachWithCaution: feel free to put me on silent now
...
NotHermione: alright, I'm up. Congratulate me.
ApproachWithCaution: much congratulations, lots of congratulations. Good work.
NotHermione: I'm very proud; I think I should get a medal
ApproachWithCaution: are you saving people today?
NotHermione: no, the people will have to save themselves for the time being
ApproachWithCaution: so what are you going to do?
NotHermione: sit... Sit... Sleep... Eat a sandwich and then I'm going to sleep some more.
ApproachWithCaution: you need fiber
NotHermione: is this like me needing ice cream? Or an actual health concern?
ApproachWithCaution: actual health concern. I don't know what fiber is but I think it's important and you aren't getting enough of it.
NotHermione: I'm gonna stop talking to you know because your an idiot. Have fun being a spy, talk to you later.
ApproachWithCaution: I will, we get to raid people today, guns and helmets and everything.
ApproachWithCaution: I probably shouldn't have texted that, please forget.