Chapter 4

Naruto had gotten the wrong milk. Seemed kittens could not drink cow's milk, so the six pack of fresh milk would probably stay in his fridge till it spoiled. It was a real shame.

The six pack of kitten's milk, on the other hand, looked, smelled… and tasted delicious. Sasuke would really like it. It was expensive, but then, performing back-up duties for an S-class mission, as well as almost single-handedly taking out an S-ranked missing-nin made Gama-chan a very fat froggy.

The cow's milk was probably the reason Sasuke had gotten diarrhoea in the first place. Though, Sasuke's human side should have been able to handle cow's milk, right? But then, Sasuke's cat side hadn't kicked in with the whole litter box debacle. And Sasuke didn't lick himself clean, and had no problems with baths, or water in general…

Naruto shook his head, deciding in that moment that he would figure it out as he goes.

Another interesting fact though – kittens usually curled up on their owner's laps or under their chins for warmth, since they can't generate much warmth of their own. Naruto wondered if that was why Sasuke was so…cuddly the first morning they had met.

Naruto was not sure how to feel about the perfectly practical reason for Sasuke's behaviour, since at first, he had thought it was some sort of bonding thing that kittens did. That thought had been touching, and it depressed him a little to find out that that might not be all to it.

"Kaa-san… Otou-sama…"

And suddenly, all rumination on the interesting factoids he had learned in that kitten care book ceased as though they had never been, leaving him with a single thought.

He wanted to see Itachi, now more than ever.

Not because he was still confused about the Uchiha, which he was, but for the simple fact that he was going to kill him.

Itachi was still the one who killed Sasuke's family after all.

He was the reason Sasuke had been crying non-stop into his chest since the previous night. It was now what… ten in the morning? His clone had finished reading that kitten care book four hours ago.

Yeah, Naruto was going to kill Itachi. Even if he got all his limbs cut off and was only a head that could bite him to death.

But, now, that wouldn't do, would it? Because the fact that Itachi was still alive and coming back home for him was the one little light Sasuke had left.

Naruto was too humble to think that he was also a bit of light in Sasuke's life.

But he did realise that if he slaughtered Itachi with his bare hands like he so wanted to do in front of Sasuke – and consequentially broke the promise he had thrice made to Sasuke the previous night – he would never again hear the kitten call him friend. It unnerved him when he realised that a significant part of him did not care.

Is this what the desire for revenge feels like? Naruto could not help wondering. It was all-consuming, and before Naruto had known it, it had put itself above the importance of his bond with Sasuke.

It was a scary thing.

It had consumed Sasuke once already. But never again. Not if Naruto had anything to do with it.

"Kaa-san…" Naruto sighed. A brilliant beam of sunlight suddenly struck his eye; with a muted swear he stretched up and closed his curtains. Blue. Because Sasuke had insisted on them, being uncomfortable with someone's ability to look in this room any time they wanted.

Naruto had never really seen a need for the privacy. Hardly anyone used to visit him anyway when he was a kid, and by the time that changed, no curtains had already become a habit. That and he was hardly home anyway.

But the things really did come in handy. Naruto liked the cool blue light that now filtered through the room. It made the room feel cooler, though it did nothing to ease Sasuke's crying.

Nothing Naruto did helped. He had lain on his back for more hours than he bothered to count, hugging Sasuke-kitten to his chest and stroking his head and ears. He said nothing – Sasuke did not need words, especially from someone who never had parents to lose.

Sometimes Sasuke would cry, and wail and scream; other times he only released anguished whimpers and quiet, body-shaking sobs interjected with the names of his parents, or a call for Itachi; sometimes he would clench his teeth and claws with the pain, digging through Naruto's shirt and into his chest (not that Naruto complained or said anything at all); and finally (and Naruto thought this was the worst), Sasuke would just lay limp and unmoving and silent, staring at nothing as though dead, and leaving Naruto to wonder and worry until he started crying again.

Finally, at around noon, Sasuke did none of these. Naruto looked. The kitten was blinking slowly at the curtains, looking more drained than a baby had a right to look.

"Nawuto?" Baby talk. He must really be exhausted. "You know, there were times that I really did hate my Nii-chan." Sasuke paused. Naruto gave a soft 'yeah' to show he was listening.

"Nii-chan was good at everything, and Otou-sama would onwy look at him. He never noticed me. And eve'yone in our clan always told me I should be like Itachi, or that Itachi could do it better. And I would think, sometimes, that I woulda been happier if Nii-chan wasn't there. Then everyone would look at me and say I was the best." Sasuke shook, his little claws digging into Naruto's shirt again. "And now," he hiccupped, his voice growing high and tight to signal a new wave of tears, "and now, Nawuto, all I want is to see my Nii-chan, and pway with my Nii-chan, and be with my Nii-chan, and he's not here. Eve'yone else is dead and I'm all alone and Nii-chan's not here to make it better."

Naruto hugged the kitten closer, stroking his ears until he stopped shaking.

"I deserve it, Nawuto. I deserve this. I hated my Nii-chan, and wished he wasn't here, and now he's not here. It's my fault. I deserve it…"

"No, you don't. You don't deserve this, Sasuke. You… Sasuke?"

There was no response. Sasuke had fallen asleep.

For a moment, Naruto lay still, unsure of what to do. Then, he slowly got up, left Sasuke-kitten sleeping on the bed, and went to change his soaked-through shirt. Tiny pinpricks dotted his chest from Sasuke's claws, leaving a mosaic of blackened spots of blood all over his torso.

He sighed again, took a shower, and inspected the spots again. They should have been nearly healed if not completely so by the Kyūbi's chakra. Then he remembered the seal Tsunade had put on him. With all the confusion over Sasuke, he had completely forgotten to ask her to remove it.

Sighing a third time, he rummaged through his first aid pouch and found some ointment to put on the pinpricks.

Then he went to Sasuke.

The kitten was already in a deep sleep, looking so grieved that tears should have still been rolling from his eyes. But Sasuke had cried out all his tears a while ago.

Naruto wet a towel from the bathroom and gently cleaned Sasuke's face, erasing the near-permanent tracks the river of tears had left. He changed Sasuke out of his dirty, sweaty clothes, dabbed at his heated skin with the cool towel, and changed him into a simple baby's shirt; it still ended up dwarfing him so that he did not even need the pants the outfit came with.

Naruto realised he was starving, but not in the mood to wait those three accursed minutes for cup ramen. Waiting for more time at Ichiraku's, however, never seemed that bad. He would get take-out though – he did not want to leave Sasuke alone too long, even though he was sleeping. And he would get the kitten a bowl – Ichiraku's should have kid's sizes, right?

After locking the door, moving Sasuke so his head sunk into his pillow, and stroking his ears a bit in a gesture he hoped would tell him that everything would be all right, he prepared to leap out the window.

Knock. Kno-kno-kno-knock-knock.

Ero-sennin.

He shut the bedroom door, hesitated, then opened the apartment door to a grave-looking Jiraiya. Before he could convince the man to come with him for ramen, his sensei's next words made him bite his tongue.

"I've got a lead on the location of the leader of Akatsuki. I'm headed over there right now."

"You're going there alone?!" Naruto exploded, slamming his hands on his kitchen's one table. "I should come with you!"

"Naruto –"

"I'll get my things," he said, grabbing his orange track pants from off the floor and tightening the leg holster. "Man Ero-sennin, you shoulda told me earlier –"

"You're not coming with me, Naruto."

"Let's see…I'm a little short on shuriken – I'm sure Sakura-chan wouldn't mind me borrowing from her stash – OOF!"

Naruto did not get a whack to the head; instead it felt like a punch to the gut. Naruto's stomach was smoking from where Jiraiya's five fingers had slammed into it. He was not sent flying, nor did he land flat on his back as he did when he was a kid.

He did skid back a few feet though, the floor squeaking beneath the balls of his feet and the friction taking off a few layers of skin, until his back hit his bedroom door.

The seal was gone.

That was good; it had been frustrating to only be able to summon five shadow clones at a time.

"Thanks," Naruto grunted, doubling over slightly. He missed Jiraiya slowly rubbing residues of ointment between his fingers. "I think. Now I'm really ready for –"

"You're not coming with me, Naruto."

"Why?"

"You're asking me?" Naruto was taken aback. Was Jiraiya… disappointed? At his look of confusion, Jiraiya gave a grunt of frustration. "Is that all it takes for you to forget that you have certain responsibilities here? In this village? You can't go around as you like anymore, Naruto."

"What are… you…?"

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Oh no.

No.

Again. He had almost… Again! Why was it that easy for him to forget? What the hell was wrong with him?

Naruto's back hit the door again and he slid down it, his look of horror only dwarfed by his self-loathing.

"I can't come with you, Ero-sennin," he said at last, his voice deep with his own disgust.

You weren't going to anyway. Jiraiya kept his wry thoughts to himself, and cleared his throat.

"Releasing that seal is not really what I came here to do. In fact, it was more an errand from Tsunade." Naruto blinked and slowly rose to his feet. "You see, I've come to give you something. Something that was entrusted to me by the Fourth Hokage."

Naruto's eyes widened and he unconsciously gripped his stomach, where the seal still showed.

"What is it?"

"The key to his own Eight Trigrams seal. With this key, you can undo the seal, and release the Kyūbi's chakra completely."

Time itself seemed to stop for Naruto in that moment. His hearing had disappeared once again – yup, officially a bad habit.

"You…want me to release…the Kyūbi's chakra?" Flashes of crimson stained his vision – of blood, of hatred. Sakura went flying, Ero-sennin was slumped on the ground in front of him with a massive gash in his chest.

"No… No!"

"Naruto!"

"No! I won't take it! I won't let it out!"

"Naruto, listen –"

"I will never rely on that power again!"

"You say that, but why is it that it always takes over, Naruto!" Naruto tried to escape but Jiraiya gripped his shoulders, keeping him against the door. "That last time, what happened? Tell me!"

"No… Ero-sennin…"

"You knew you weren't strong enough. So you surrendered, didn't you?"

"No…"

"You let it take over. You let it give you power."

"That's why I promised I wouldn't let it happen again!"

"It almost happened with Danzō."

Naruto's body shook. He roared and pushed against Jiraiya, but he was too strong.

"Why give me the key then! Why undo the seal?!"

"Because I believe that you can learn to control it."

"Why? Because of 'that technique'? The one the Fourth thought I could complete?"

The sarcasm dripping from Naruto's words stunned him. "Since when did you lose faith in yourself? Did getting taken off the mission really hurt you that badly?"

"Shut up." Jiraiya swallowed. Naruto's eyes were flickering red, and a mad, roiling chakra ran hot just beneath his skin. "Don't ever mention that mission to me, Ero-sennin."

Jiraiya gritted his teeth. It was a big risk, but he had to take it. He could not afford Naruto refusing the key.

"I will mention the mission, Naruto. You were taken off of it because you can't control the Kyūbi's chakra."

"Shut up."

"You an idiot who always lets it spiral out of control, begging it for power when you're in dire straits."

"Shut up!"

"You never acknowledge your own weakness until it's too late, and then you beg for fast power. In that respect, you're no different from Sasuke. Look at you. You're even doing it now."

Naruto's breathing was jagged and hard; his eyes flickering to red and back so fast that there was no blue to one who did not know it was there. Claws dug themselves into the flimsy wood of the door to keep from slashing across Jiraiya's throat.

They had done this before. For the sake of Naruto gaining control of the demon, Jiraiya had loosened his seal and provoked him like this once before.

It was a near fatal mistake. And now…

"What…are you trying to do?" his voice was anger, an ever-growing rage that threatened to envelope his heart. Clumps of boiling crimson chakra started to ooze out of his skin, and black linings, a weak descendent of Sabaku no Gaara's but still prominent, appeared around eyes that struggled to maintain sanity.

"I'm trying to get you to acknowledge your weakness now, rather than later," Jiraiya's voice was desperate and tinged with more than a little fear. If Naruto lost control here…it might actually be worse than Tsunade's future punishment for goading him to that state.

Jiraiya kept going. Despite what Naruto thought of himself, he still believed that his pupil could keep control. And if not – he always had a trump card.

"The Fourth Hokage did not just give the Kyūbi's chakra to you on a whim." Crimson eyes glared at him, and jagged breaths puffed out between rabid fangs.

Jiraiya brought his face closer to Naruto's, looking him in the eye. "The Eight Trigram seal is not a complete seal, Naruto. It allows a bit of the Kyūbi's chakra to mix with yours. That was not an accident, or a slapdash decision. The Fourth always intended for you to have control of the Kyūbi's chakra. He believed in you from the very beginning."

Jiraiya swallowed again. He knew the next few statements could be his death, but he had to take the chance.

"Tsunade told me what you said about being under a genjutsu." Naruto's entire body went stiff. Every muscle was taut. He was ready to strike at a millisecond's notice. Jiraiya was in no position to dodge if this happened. Yet he stayed where he was, his face so close to Naruto's he could feel the heat of his breath.

The boiling chakra spread slowly along Naruto's body, burning his hands as it came in contact. Jiraiya moved his hands a little, but still kept a strong grip on his godson.

"Naruto, even if the genjutsu made you admit in the end, it wouldn't have happened if, somewhere deep down, you truly did not agree with the man's words. You know you are not strong enough to face Itachi. And Itachi… wants to kill Sasuke. Are you strong enough, as you are now, to protect him? Or even to help him protect himself?"

The sound of snapping wood hurried Jiraiya's next sentence, and forced his hand.

"If you went on a rampage, even if it was in defence of Sasuke, could you stop yourself, or rather stop the Kyūbi from hurting him? From killing him?"

His ace worked.

Naruto's jaw fell open, releasing the strangled sound of choked air. Wood no longer snapped; the room was silent. His eyes were so wide that Jiraiya could see the veined whites of his sclera. The eyes themselves twitched in their sockets. His body was perfectly still, except for some residual quivering, as would happen when a string is pulled taut.

Jiraiya realised with alarm that Naruto had stopped breathing.

"Naruto?" he shook him. "Naruto!" He hit him firmly under his ribcage. Naruto coughed out of reflex and took in air again, though much too heavily for Jiraiya's liking. But when Naruto looked up at him, his eyes were blue, and the red chakra was gone – receded completely.

"Naruto?"

"I hurt you," Naruto whispered, panting as he rapidly tried to regain his breath. "I almost killed you. I hurt Sakura-chan."

"And it will happen again. It won't just go away because you want it to. In every battle, and life in general, there is hate, and with that hate your heart will reach out to the Kyūbi's. And then the Kyūbi's 'will', its hatred, will overtake you. The cycle will repeat. It will keep happening, again and again, until either you learn control, or the Kyūbi's will and chakra consume you completely. Taking this key, Naruto, is the only chance you have of stopping this cycle for good."

For the first time since he entered the apartment, Jiraiya smiled.

"I know you can do it. Just now, you wanted to attack me, but you managed to reign it in." Though you stopped breathing from the effort. "And earlier with Danzō, you managed to calm down without me applying the seal. You can do it, Naruto. You can learn how to control it completely."

By this time, Naruto was breathing normally. He leaned against the door, his eyes closed, taking in Jiraiya's words.

When he opened his eyes, they shone in their clarity. Jiraiya smiled. He had seen that brilliance only once before – when the boy declared that he would rather be a fool the rest of his life, than follow the 'wisdom' of giving up on a friend.

"I'll do it. You're right, Ero-sennin. I can't protect Sasuke the way I am now…in fact the way I am now is a risk to him. And also…"

"Also?"

"It took Sasuke three years' training with Orochimaru to be able to fight Itachi. He learned how to use every ounce of his power to his advantage…probably even the Curse Seal." He gripped his stomach again. "I don't like the Kyūbi. But he's mine. Like it or not, his chakra is part of my power too. It always has been. I still don't want to rely on it, but like you said I would have to learn to control it sooner or later. Either that or its hatred will eventually consume me. And I can't let that happen. I still have to become Hokage. And protect Sasuke."

He looked at Jiraiya, his eyes shining with new light. "I'll take the key, and learn how to control the Kyūbi's chakra. After all I am the Kyūbi's Jinchūriki."

Jiraiya stared at that sparkling grin for a moment, the expression void of all the anger and hatred it held just a few moments ago.

Your faith was well-placed, Minato.

Jiraiya grinned, and slapped Naruto on the back. "Honestly, talking some sense into an idiot really takes up a lot of time. I could've been deep inside Amegakure by now following my lead."

"Amegakure? Is that where Akatsuki's leader – mmphm!"

"I'm sorry, Naruto, I forgot to tell you I actually didn't want everyone in Konoha to know," Jiraiya hissed. A sheepish upturning of the eyebrows and a grin hidden beneath his hand made him scowl as he bit his thumb and wonder about giving the key to Naruto after all.

Well, too late now.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"

Naruto came away from the door, staring at the orange and black toad with an … obi? around its waist. With a barely hidden wince, he realised it as the toad from that time, when Jiraiya had almost…

The toad stared back at him, its arms folded and an annoyed scowl on its face. Naruto wondered what he did to irritate the creature, when he realised the scowl wasn't for him.

"So you're really giving it to him?" he turned to Jiraiya. "Did you forget what happened the last time you used me to open up his seal just a little bit?" he said, indicating the size between two of his…fingers? "You almost died."

"Yeah, we went through all that already Gerotora. The kid agreed anyway."

"You didn't have to say it like that. It's not like I don't care you almost died," Naruto complained at Gerotora's aghast look.

"The past is in the past," Jiraiya said with a wave of his hand. "Anyway, Naruto agreed. So hurry it up, let him sign already so I can get out of here."

With a great humph, the toad's obi split, with the toad's upper half rising, revealing a yellow-and-black striped pattern scroll. Naruto gaped as the scroll fell open, revealing a complicated design of script, and at the end, a larger copy of Naruto's Eight Trigrams seal, inside of an even larger circle.

When Naruto took a step back and looked at the whole diagram, he realised it resembled a giant key.

A small box was to the left of the large circle. Naruto stepped up to it, focusing chakra to the ends of the fingertips of his right hand. He pressed it into the box and waited. And waited.

"…Uh. Is that it?"

"Well, as far as the contract goes," Gerotora sighed, winding the scroll back up into his body and shrinking down to his previous size, the two halves of his obi meeting with a metallic clink.

"Now we need to do the storage."

"How do you do the storage?"

"You don't have to do anything," Gerotora casually assured him, "Just open your mouth."

Naruto tilted his head a little, thinking it was strange, but shrugged and opened up.

"Wider than that, Naruto," Jiraiya directed with an exasperated gesture of his arms. "Pretend you're eating that miso pork ramen you love so much."

"AAAAAHHHH!"

"All right," said Gerotora, stretching a bit, "Keep it right there."

Wait a second, I wonder what he's going to – GEEEEEEEEEHHHHHH!

With a slap to Gerotora's backside from Jiraiya, the toad went down Naruto's throat; who immediately fell to his knees and retched, his eyes watering.

"Why…the mouth…it was slimy…and gross…and tasted like…"

"Honestly, I've seen you eat worse things," Jiraiya sighed, patting Naruto on the back. "Stop puking already, there's still one more thing we need to talk about."

Naruto coughed, wiping saliva from his mouth with the back of his hand. Having had nothing to eat since the previous day, he did not make a mess. In fact, thanks to a certain toad who he could feel was still… adjusting… he felt full enough to abstain from food for the next three days.

"What?"

And here was where things got strange.

Jiraiya averted his eyes. Only for a millisecond. The movement was so slight that one would have had to have lived with the man for three years to notice it.

Naruto noticed.

Now, there were a few instances where Jiraiya did this, but two stood out for their superior frequency.

One was where the toad sage had, once again, spent all of Naruto's money traipsing the town with women, or lounging in the bars (and less reputable places) with women, instead of getting them food, or buying a room at the inn, or paying off his intel. When Naruto asked for it, he would look away and suddenly make up an excuse whose lameness and sheer incredibility would shame Kakashi, or change the subject – usually to finding a place, outdoors, to set up camp for the night.

The other was when Jiraiya, with a certain pervy gleam in his eye, snuck out of the bath at hot springs, and told Naruto an excuse synonymous with the previous description, leaving Naruto to soak alone with a perfectly timed crow flying overhead cawing out a very comedic onomatopoeia.

In both cases, when Jiraiya averted his eyes, it was accompanied with varying degrees of guilt.

This was the first time the guilt had been wholly sincere.

And it unnerved Naruto. Greatly.

"Ero-sennin?" he questioned, wanting for some strange reason to get into the bedroom behind him. He suddenly needed to see Sasuke.

Now.

"Uh, just wait a sec, Ero-sennin, I need to go check on –"

Jiraiya put one of his large hands on Naruto's shoulder, holding on with the child of an iron grip. Though the child was growing up fast.

"You're not going anywhere, Naruto." The child was now an adult. Naruto's heart was racing for the second time that day.

And he heard movement in the bedroom.

Movement that was too loud and too big to be made by Sasuke.

He turned his head swiftly to the room, before smoke filled his vision and he was falling, falling, falling into a whole other world.

It was beautiful. A vibrant, verdant place with wild bright colours from large, flamboyant flowers and massive mushrooms and great, lush but strange vegetation: giant corkscrew florae the size of trees, with openings at their tops that gushed pure, sparkling water like never-ending faucets.

It was paradise. Much, much nicer than his tiny apartment. A pity that he was here now, at a time when paradise could have burned and he could not have cared less.

If it meant that he could get back to Sasuke, he could not care less.

He did not even see Gamakichi and Gamatatsu staring at him, expecting a greeting, or even a reaction out of Naruto, who had never been to Mount Myōboku, The Toad Mountain before.

It would have been satisfying, and funny, to see Naruto fall flat on his behind in awe and shock after his sudden Reverse Summoning, followed by his yelling at Jiraiya for not warning him. Or by him puking again – Reverse Summoning could be rough on first timers.

But no, Naruto was just standing there – with this weird look on his face, like he was struggling not to scream.

Jiraiya smirked, spread out his arms, cocked up one leg and hopped forward a bit, rotating his head like a drunken turtle.

"Welcome, Naruto, to Mount Myōboku, home of the Great Toads and birthplace of the rare, the dangerous, the coveted Sage Arts! The place where mere ninjutsu is transformed into Senjutsu, and great Sages, destined to change the world, are born and raised! I, Jiraiya-sama the Great Sage of this mystical, mysterious and myth-inspiring place, have brought you here, so that you too can –!"

"Take me back."

Jiraiya froze. Then his arms dropped as though a puppet's strings had been cut, and hung limply at his sides. His expression fell with them.

"Come on, Naruto! Do you even see this place? This is where I learned Sage Mode and became a Sage, and now I've brought you here so that you can –"

"I don't care." This time, Jiraiya's jaw firmed. The struggling lighthearted atmosphere was now destroyed completely. Naruto turned his head slightly to him, something akin to madness flickering in his too-wide eyes. "Take me back. Now."

"I can't do that."

"I'll destroy this place." Gamakichi and Gamatatsu flinched, while Jiraiya's face hardened into a grim parody of his kabuki-esque smirk. "I'll use the key you just gave me to release the Kyūbi's chakra, and I'll –"

Jiraiya was at his side in an instant, and Naruto was restrained in a spiky mass of white hair before he could blink, with the point of a particularly long spike playing at his neck.

"You realise, Naruto," he calmly stated, with that dangerous smirk still in place, "That I will break every bone in your body before you ever have a chance to do such a thing."

Naruto's lips curled back into a wild smirk of his own, his teeth a little sharper than they should be.

"You realise, Ero-sennin, that I would still try anyway. The guts to never give up. I've got it just as much as you do."

Jiraiya chuckled, and his hair tightened around Naruto, threatening to break skin.

"Um –" the utterance of a shaky voice was quickly quieted by a frantic 'shut up!' "But, there's something on Naruto nii-chan's leg."

Master and student blinked, and looked down with identical expressions of bemusement. There was indeed something attached to Naruto's leg, something small, black and furry, whose claws were dug deep into the blond's flesh.

How Naruto never felt that, Jiraiya could only hope the explanation was adrenaline. He did not want to think about what it meant for Naruto's mental capacity if it had taken that long for the pain to reach his brain.

"Sasuke?" The kitten looked up, his eyes watering and unfocused, and his cheeks a greenish tinge. "Sasuke!"

Naruto picked the kitten up, hugging and spinning him around as soon as Jiraiya released his Hari Jizō technique.

He was so happy he failed to notice Sasuke's cheeks filling up.

"Uh, Naruto," Jiraiya always did have the shrewder eyes, "He looks like he's going to –"

"BLEEEEEGGGGHHHH!"

A/N: A short chapter this time (well, short-er anyway).

The next chapter will be fun. Lots of fun.

See you all next time.