Chapter 8
The town had no name. It was nowhere on any map. It was poor, and tiny, with a population of less than five hundred.
It was snuggled in a small valley, surrounded by tall hills and small mountains whose faces were dotted with gaping black entrances.
Mining tunnels. The mountains' veins were long bled dry, but a few people had remained, not needing promised riches to love the peaceful and scarred beauty of those pitted mounts.
Thus, an old outpost long abandoned by fickle owners had been expanded and inhabited by the original miners' families and their successive generations, as well as people who just had nowhere else to go.
Because of its unique population, most who came seeking refuge would not be turned away. The town's poverty and no name status almost guaranteed protection from criminals looking to become rich or make a name for themselves. Its absence from any map made it incredibly easy to stumble upon, but twice as difficult to find again.
It would be the perfect hiding place; however, because its population was so small, it only took half a day for everyone to know that their population had increased. Another week or so would pass before the residents could be sure whether or not it was a permanent addition.
The town's newest refugees had about three more days before this decision would be made. While still a bit apprehensive of the larger of the two men, most could not deny that the other was rather handsome, even beautiful if one felt brave enough to go so far.
It was too bad he was an invalid.
They had holed up where most new refugees did; in the old fisherman's shack on the opposite side of the valley's one and only river. It was not too near and not too far from the settlement; perfect for newcomers who wished to be left alone to recuperate and observe without diving full-fledged into an unknown population.
Though most did not realise that this also worked the other way around. But none of the villagers felt any need to let newcomers know this.
The shack was also the place for foreigners to make a decision. Depending on which way one decided, that old shack would become either too far from the place they wished to call home, or too near to the place they wished to leave.
For that reason, that place was nicknamed Den of the Hesitant; to refer to the almost animalistic way that newcomers poked their heads out from the shack to scope and survey the town before making their next move.
The few that did not do this were usually already decided on their course of action. These were always either travellers who already had a set destination in mind and were unfortunately detoured by stumbling into this godforsaken valley, or true refugees who were still being chased by the person, or persons who made them refugees in the first place.
The large, blue-skinned man, one of the two most recent newcomers, fell into the latter category perfectly. He was still being chased, and he knew exactly what he wanted to do with this town.
Leave. As quickly as possible.
All the residents of this backwater place already knew they were here, what they looked like. It was not good enough that the only way to find the place was by pure accident or a crudely drawn map from the town's single cartographer.
It was not good enough to hide from Akatsuki. On much less information, they had already found secret communities that lived in much more secluded places – the most memorable being an entire pseudo-empire whose inhabitants lived in holes in the ground.
He had already stayed here too long. His 'ex' partner had already given up on life. He'd seen that look…too many times.
"I'm leaving."
The man who was sitting in a plain futon by the window said nothing. He was slouched over, his long hair out of its habitual ponytail and falling over his shoulders, faintly shadowing his eyes. The sun was setting, casting crimson light over the river's waters and gently brushing against the man's ghost-like skin.
It almost made him look like he had blood in his veins, almost hid the truth that he had coughed and vomited up most of his body's blood supply.
Four days. They (he: the silent man made no effort to save himself: not that he could, anyway) had been running without sleep, food or natural water for four days when this town finally came into view.
At that point, he did not care if the man in the orange swirled mask was that town's mayor.
He was going to rest.
And he had. Far longer than he intended to. It was so easy to rest here, in quiet and peace. But he could not let himself be fooled.
Akatsuki was after him. Both of them. The mask would, and could kill his silent (friend? comrade?) … partner at first sight. He had felt his bloodlust in their last encounter; so seasoned, rich, deep, and terrifying. Few things scared him, but the will of the man he had direly mistaken for a fool petrified him.
He could probably get out of dying by blaming everything on Itachi's genjutsu.
But he would not. He hated lies.
"Those few days on the run were rough. But I've recovered." He rotated his left arm, fresh bandages applied to the almost-closed wound.
Without the healing chakra Samehada had absorbed from that girl, he would have lost that arm, and would probably have had to do the amputation himself.
He had her to thank for Itachi as well. She extended his life by three weeks for the most. Unless some sort of miracle happened, at the end of three weeks, Itachi would be no more…
Kisame did not believe in miracles.
"So I'm leaving." He stood, picking up a large, bandaged sword and hooking it to his back. "Tobi…"
'Madara.' It was the first and last time Itachi would speak since his battle with Danzō. He said it while slung over the giant man's shoulder, his head occasionally bumping against Samehada. 'His true identity is Uchiha Madara. Do not underestimate him…'
"Madara will be here any day now." A sharp row of teeth glinted in a habitual grin. "I'm gonna meet up with him and return to Akatsuki."
The grin faded. The man frowned. "I won't wait around here to die with you, Itachi."
Kisame believed that after one had fed, clothed and bathed a man, he had a right to drop honorifics. Not that Itachi had ever insisted on honorifics, or even asked for them.
And, well, Kisame had only bathed him once, after he had fallen unconscious at the first place they stopped to rest. After that, Itachi adamantly insisted on performing all toiletries by himself.
Not by speaking, or glaring, both of which Kisame would have greatly preferred. He would have welcomed any sign that showed him that Itachi was still alive, or rather, still wanted to be alive.
But no. After he realised what Kisame had done for him while he was unconscious, Itachi simply used whatever little chakra he had to stick himself to the floor when Kisame (uncertainly) tried again.
There were no more attempts after that.
Itachi kept himself clean. However, he could not seem to bring himself to take food, water or medicine.
What the hell happened in that fight with Danzō?
Kisame had been on the verge of asking him this many times, but he knew it would be pointless.
All he knew was that two lives were claimed. Only one mattered to him.
Itachi's left eye was dead.
Was he mourning? Kisame could not tell. Things such as mourning and grief always seemed too mundane for the last older brother of the Uchiha.
After all, anyone he would grieve over was dead already. And since they had all been killed by the Uchiha's own hands, 'grieving' in itself was reduced from a useless concept to a rather stupid one.
No. Itachi was not grieving. It was simpler and more precise than that.
His eye died, and his spirit – any lifeforce that could be defined as 'Itachi' died right along with it.
No different then, was the indomitable will that had prolonged Itachi's life as much as the medicine. Day in and day out, Itachi sat there like a porcelain doll, doing nothing, saying nothing.
Sure the Uchiha had never been talkative. But eight days had never passed without so much as a word from him.
Kisame had known him from since he was a kid. They had been partners (comrades?) for almost seven years.
Going eight days without hearing him speak was… unsettling. It was the same feeling one would get if they had lived by the ocean all their life, and was suddenly moved to a place where they could not hear it.
Unease.
Kisame hated it. Dead will, dead soul, dead voice. He hated it all. And now, he would leave it behind.
He opened the shack's door and took one last look at Itachi, who still had not acknowledged that he heard Kisame say a single thing. But Kisame knew he was listening.
He opened his mouth for a curtailed goodbye…
Quack-quack-quack. Quack-quack-quack.
Kisame froze. Itachi's finger twitched. The quiet alarm sounded deafening in the shack's silence.
Kisame glanced over to a small, crude table, where the alarm sat quacking away, next to a tall vial of green fluid that would only last a couple more days if used sparingly.
Itachi was too sick to use it sparingly. The alarm's quacking announced that it was time for another dose.
Kisame remembered perfectly when they had gotten it. He didn't remember where, but it was a busy street. Not overcrowded, just busy.
They were walking at a good pace, not too fast or slow, when Itachi had suddenly stopped, the chimes on his hat tinkling as his head swiftly turned. Kisame had blinked, never seeing Itachi perform such an abrupt action outside of a fight. If there was a shop he wanted to visit, he would plan ahead, or see it from a distance, and walk in that direction with a set purpose in his steps.
Kisame's eyes had then followed to where Itachi was looking. Behind a very clean shop window sat a tiny alarm, small enough to fit in a child's hand.
In the shape of a black duck.
He looked up. Itachi was gone. A minute later, the black duck was gone. Thirty seconds after that, Itachi walked out with it in his hand, already setting the timer.
"So I don't forget my doses," he said nonchalantly, holding his hand up and letting the thing fall into his sleeve. He continued walking down the street.
'You never forget your doses.'
Kisame followed him, not saying a word.
It was the only civilian thing Itachi owned.
Something in Kisame felt … off … when he thought that this would be the last time he was hearing it.
He went through the door, closed it behind him, and walked away without saying a word.
The duck was still quacking.
It's not my problem any –
"Hey mister. You really leaving him?"
What?
He looked down. A little… tentative boy? … looked back up at him. He (she?) had shoulder-length white hair and soft, droopy eyes with thick brows and eyelashes.
In an uncharacteristic moment, Kisame thought this child looked less like a child and more like a baby sheep.
"What?"
The child put his (her?) index into his (its!) mouth and looked up at him with a sorrowful expression.
"He coughs just like mama. Does red stuff come out when he coughs too?"
"Wha –?"
"Lamb!" Moments later, a (definitive) boy came running, with dark hair and sharper eyes. He looked to be about ten. "Sorry mister, he (oh, so it was a boy) got away from me."
"You were watching us," Kisame smirked. "From those bushes over there. The leaves are still on your pants."
The boy blushed. "Uh, yeah. Only 'cause we heard that guy coughing one day. Sounds like our mom." The boy shifted uncomfortably. "My name's Akio. This is Akihiko," he pointed to the sheep-child, "but we nicknamed him Lamb."
So it's not just me.
"Well then," he started walking away, "good day."
"Uh, wait!"
Kisame frowned. I wonder if I should kill them. How long had they been watching anyway? As a ninja, he had trained himself, as much as he could, to sense chakra signatures whenever they were nearby. Samehada only reacted to chakra it liked (or really hated), so it was no help in sensing civilians.
He was even worse at it. It didn't make sense to him to bother anyway. After all, civilians weren't a threat to him.
Only Itachi bothered to try. He probably already knew they were here.
Kisame felt a pang of irritation but did not know why.
"You're a ninja, right mister?" Akio asked, approaching him with careful steps. "Before you go, could you help us? We wanna get some medicine for our mom."
What was with these kids? He was huge, he was blue, and he had a massive sword on his back. Even stray dogs were smart enough to run from him.
Oh. Right. They've been watching for a while. So they think they know everything.
Time to prove them wrong.
He reached back for Samehada, and in a movement faster than should have been possible the blade was rested on Akio's shoulder, not enough to topple him, but enough for him to feel its weight.
The boy froze, his eyes grew wide, his face grew pale. All classic reactions that Kisame loved.
"What's in it for me if I help you?" his standard grin was in place. Akio swallowed at the sight of the wickedly sharp teeth.
"We'll tell you which way to go from here to get to the nearest town," he answered readily. Seemed he had done this kind of thing before.
Kisame's smirk grew wider. "I could just kill your little brother and force the information out of you."
Akio's arm immediately flew in front of Lamb, who shrunk back behind him.
"You wouldn't." It was not said as a gasp of horror that he could suggest such a thing. Instead, it was said as a surety. As truth.
Kisame blinked. "How are you so sure?"
"Because you're taking care of that guy." He made to nod over to the shack, but Samehada swiftly prohibited the movement. "It's tough taking care of an invalid. You can't do it if you don't have a heart." The boy then had the audacity to smirk. "And people who have hearts don't kill kids who did nothin' to 'em."
Kisame grinned. He lifted the sword from Akio's shoulder, but before the child had a chance to sigh in relief, he held the blade high over his head, ready to bring it down in a vicious chop that would split them both in two.
Akio's teeth gritted; he made to shove Lamb away from him as the blade swung down, slicing through the air and towards the child's skull.
All right, we'll help you.
Kisame froze. Samehada was centimetres from the boy's sweaty forehead. Kisame gritted his teeth in frustration.
Was it that ingrained?
Kisame could see him take a step forward, pointedly ignoring the bit of violence that Samehada almost wrought.
'Tch.' The sound came out before he could stop it. His arm raised Samehada in unthinking motion; having been trained through repetition to pull the sword back whenever Itachi took that step forward.
Except Itachi was not here.
It did not matter. It still felt like he was. Kisame could hear him listing out the conditions, and mirrored words spilled from his lips.
"I'll help. But if it's too much trouble, I'll decline. And if the information is lacking," here, Kisame smiled. The children stepped back, swallowing heavily. In terms of delivering fear, his teeth had nothing to want from the Sharingan. "I will return," he ended simply. Both kids knew what that meant.
Akio's body stiffened, his jaw firmed as he nodded.
"If you don't reach the next town in two days with my directions, you can come back for me. But leave Lamb out of it, he don't know nothin'."
Yup. This kid's definitely done this before. Kisame grinned once more, his hand leaving Samehada completely.
"Very well. Where to?"
Akio jerked his thumb to a small rowboat that Kisame could fill just by standing up.
He took Lamb's hand and ran towards the boat. "You're a ninja, you can walk right?"
Kisame smirked and followed.
The sun slowly set, leaving the sky in a rapidly fading shade of red and orange.
Kisame walked, Akio rowed, and Lamb made string figures. Kisame glanced at the string contorted in innumerable twists and loops around the child's fingers.
He had never understood that game.
Lamb pulled his hands apart. Kisame blinked. Even he could recognise the shape as a broomstick. Impressive.
"Hey, mister?"
"Kisame."
"What?"
"My name."
"Oh. Kisame, what's that cloak for? Does it mean somethin'?"
"No."
"Is it comfy?"
"You're asking too many questions, kid."
"Oh. Sorry."
Akatsuki. Kisame did not know why he had lied to Itachi. It was the first time untruth slipped past his tongue since… another life ago.
Why did he go that far? To get a reaction out of his dead-souled partner? That sounded too petty, but it was probably the closest thing to the truth.
Either way, Kisame had no intentions of going back to Akatsuki. After he learned that Tobi was really Uchiha Madara, and he remembered the bloodlust he had aimed towards Itachi, Kisame only felt one thing.
Betrayal.
A world with no more lies? A world of peace?
A world where one would no longer be forced to kill their comrades?
Bullshit.
No one was forcing him, so why was he after his own family blood? Itachi could do nothing against him or Akatsuki the way he was now.
Did he want Itachi to die all along? Since Danzō did not manage to do the job, was he looking to finish it?
Well, Madara could have him. He was finished with the Uchiha. They were liars, all of them. It was time for him to move forward and find his own peace.
Make his own world without lies.
"I found out about this medicine."
Akio was talking. Kisame glanced at him.
"It's called River Stars because the weeds light up at night and they look like underwater stars. Anyway, back before I found out about this, mom was coughing really, really bad. She was gonna (he glanced at Lamb) well, she wasn't lookin' good. So I started thinkin' 'bout how to save her.
"The doctor said she kept coughing up blood and mucus. I didn't know what that was – mucus, not blood, I know what blood is – so I got my big brother (there are more of you?) to give me one of his books. He travels a lot so he has lots of books. I saw what mucus was, and that frogs have it all over their bodies. That's why frogs are so slimy."
"Frogs?" Kisame could not help asking. How did we get to frogs?
Akio caught himself. He laughed. "Sorry. I'm not so good at storytellin'. You see, we eat frogs." Well that was abrupt. "Lamb and I, we catch 'em right on the river and eat them. We cook 'em first of course!" Good to know. "We like 'em with the skin on – keeps 'em moist – but the slime is a problem. So we always rubbed River Stars on 'em to get all the slime off. When I found out that that slime was actually mucus, it got me thinkin'."
I think I see where this is going.
"Did you know we also grind up the River Stars to put on really bad cuts? Stops the bleedin' really fast. So, I did kind of a gross experiment."
Kisame raised an eyebrow.
"I collected all the stuff mom coughed out for a day, then ground up the River Stars until I got enough juice to pour over it. In about five minutes most everything was dried up! I couldn't believe it!"
You know, I think I'm actually starting to like this kid.
"I gave mom the juice to drink, but it just made her throw up." Akio winced a bit with guilt. "So I talked to my big brother again. He told me that drinking it would make it go into her belly. What I wanted to do was make it go into her chest, where her – uh – her…"
"Lungs," Kisame supplied with a hint of amusement.
"Yeah! Where her lungs are. So she had to breathe it in. I asked him how she could do that, and he said he knows a machine that could help. A… a…"
"Nebulizer?"
"Yeah! We don't have much money, but he's good with his hands, so he made one. He says the way it works is real simple. You just grind up the leaves, put in the juice, use your chakra to build up pressure inside – well, he's the only one of us who can use chakra, so he does that, but we crank it up – so yeah you build up the pressure and let the person breathe in the gas that comes out. And it worked! Mom was breathin' lots better! In a month she was walkin' around just like normal!"
"I thought she was an invalid," Kisame could not help but point out.
"Well, when she was coughin' she was. She's still gotta take the medicine everyday, or she'll get really sick again. Lookin' after her when she's bad like that is a real pain. She's mom. She shouldn't be weak and helpless like that. I didn't like it. That's why I thought so hard of a way to help her."
Kisame was silent. "When someone you care about is sick, you wanna help 'em right? Help 'em get strong again."
"This is the spot, right?" They had stopped five minutes ago, right in the centre of the river. "So you want me to dive down and get these weeds for you."
"Yeah. Mom's fine as long as she gets her medicine."
"How were you able to get to them before?"
"They grow all over the riverbed, even in the shallow parts near the banks. But we had some rainstorms a few weeks ago; the river burst the banks and destroyed all the shallow ones. The deep ones are all that's left. I'll need about forty stalks. Ah, they look like this."
He handed over a very well-drawn picture, with neat and precise lines.
"Your older brother?"
"Yup!"
"Let me guess, he wants to be a scientist or a doctor?"
"Yeah! How'd you know?"
Kisame shrugged and pulled off his cloak, dropping it into the boat.
"Hold on to that for me and don't look inside the pockets. There are things in there that will kill you."
Akio swallowed and pulled the cloak away from Lamb. Kisame suppressed a chuckle and his chakra, sinking into the water with barely a sound and a fraction of a ripple.
In two minutes he came up again and dropped forty stalks into the boat. Akio thanked him and promptly gave him the directions, including another well-drawn map.
Kisame took his cloak and was about to part ways with the little brats when Lamb suddenly spoke up.
"Half is yours." He turned to see the sheep-child holding out the bundle to him, tied with the string he had been playing with the entire boat ride.
Akio winked at him. Kisame silently took the parcel. Lamb smiled, making his droopy eyes look even droopier.
"We have an extra nebulizer," said Akio, starting to row away. "If you want it, follow us. If you're really leaving, then go ahead. You've got the map." He hesitated. Scowled a little, then smiled. "Taking care of an invalid is a pain. But if we don't do it, they'll die. Just leaving someone to die because they're weak – that's pretty cruel don'tcha think?"
Kisame did not answer. He just kept looking after the small boat as it rowed farther and farther away, trying to forget the stalks of River Stars Samehada already had stuffed inside its mouth.
In the lone fisherman's shack, a gruesome coughing could be heard, accentuated with the sounds of a thick substance splatting on the floor.
The sound quickened the steps of the large man who approached, with a bandaged sword on his back and a strange parcel under his arm.
Five minutes after the man entered the shack, the coughing subsided. The futon was changed; the one stained with blood was carried outside and washed in the river. The floors were cleaned of blood.
The River Stars were cut up and crushed, and soon the apparatus the man had brought was being set up.
"You're back."
The quiet, familiar greeting, one that sounded blunt and uncaring but was not, was just as quietly received by secretly starving ears.
"Yeah."
The apparatus was set up. The large man put as much chakra into the machine as it could take, then held a hard plastic mask (he had a seal holding several replacements tucked away in his cloak) up to the 'invalid's' face.
"Breathe it in deep," were the intoned instructions, "it'll help." He strapped the mask to the man's face.
The bandaged sword that leaned against the wall behind him growled.
Its owner spun around.
"Thank you."
And spun back once again. The invalid was breathing in deeply, his eyes closed. But he had spoken. The Kiri-nin was sure of it.
He stood up and started going about the room, packing up what little they owned into scrolls or pockets.
A small smile accompanied his work.
"You're welcome."
At dawn, the massive leaves of a peculiar Venus flytrap phased up like a ghost through the ground in the middle of an empty fisherman's shack.
The strange man, a separation of pure white and pure black split down the middle, peered out from between the two leaves, looking around the entire structure.
There was nothing to be seen, not a single hair or drop of blood. The place felt cold and musty, as though no life had entered the shack for decades.
The black half of the man growled. "They got away again."
The white half 'hmm'ed'. "Seems so. Kisame's better than I thought."
"Hmph."
And with that, the plant closed and sunk back into the ground, leaving ripples in the wooden floor until it was out of sight.
"An 'introduction to despair'?! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!" Jiraiya threw his head back, not bothering to retain even an ounce of decorum as he bellowed endless rounds of laughter to a plain, whitewashed ceiling.
Tsunade put a hand to her mouth and turned away, ineffectively hiding her own bout of chuckles.
Naruto blushed. And flicked Sasuke on the ear when he started to giggle. The kitten did not understand, but watching Jiraiya's large body jerk on the bed in an uncontrolled laughing fit was funny to watch.
But then, perhaps Jiraiya and Sasuke were just a little bit stir crazy. After all, along with a Naruto who slept-as-though-dead, this pleasant, comfortable, but painfully boring hospital room had been their home for the past few days.
Finally having something to smile and laugh about, well, no one could blame Jiraiya for writhing around his bed like a two year old being tickled.
"It's not funny Ero-sennin! If it wasn't for that weird feeling…"
Naruto trailed off, unable to finish that sentence. Tsunade sobered. Jiraiya's laughter died out into a few residual chuckles.
"And here I thought reading books had helped you. But jeez, if it makes you come up with lines like that, maybe you should stay outta the library kiddo."
Naruto huffed, not dignifying that with a response. Or simply not being able to think of one.
Though, he was relieved to see his master smile again. After seeing him with that face, Naruto had forgotten what Jiraiya's smile looked like.
"Naruto? Naruto, are you okay?"
"Yeah…yeah Sasuke…" A pair of slitted pupils looked at him. Sasuke did not flinch. He had grown up around stranger looking eyes.
Struggling to rise from his knees, Naruto looked back at his army of two thousand plus clones, all of them making Rasengans.
"This…is for Ero-sennin. It's gotta be big enough…to…" Naruto slumped to his elbows, and a few clones popped out of existence.
"Naruto!"
"I'm fine. I'm –"
Sasuke cut him off with a yell as he toppled over. Gamakawa was jerked off his path, pulled violently by an unknown force. The clones yelled as they lost their balance. Naruto said nothing, just flung himself forward and held on to Sasuke as the frog lurched wildly, slamming him and his clones into the walls of its unbelievably massive stomach.
Gamakawa eventually lost the fight; all the Narutos were flung to the frog's hindquarters as the amphibian's outer body was yanked, at incredible speeds, into the mouth of a toad that looked more like a whimsically designed water bottle than something alive.
Seconds after they finally stopped, and Naruto slid from the ceiling to the floor – or in the reverse direction, he couldn't tell – a massive force plunged into the centre of the frog's stomach chamber. Naruto felt half of his chakra return to him, as under the force of the blow, he and Sasuke flew out of the stomach, up the oesophagus and landed in a slimy heap on the intestines of yet another toad.
The first thing Naruto heard, besides Sasuke's very loud 'blech!' as the slime seeped into his fur, was hissing. Kind of like snakes; small, angry, snakes.
He looked up. They were surrounded by a dark sea of hissing liquid.
Acid?
Naruto looked down. There was a corpse with orange hair mere inches from his hand. He jerked back, startled –
"Naruto, what…?"
– and turned Sasuke's face so he wouldn't see. Sasuke was a ninja baby yes, but still a baby.
"What…?"
And then, he felt it. A thick fog of absolutely murderous chakra, oozing from a source right behind him.
Naruto had felt that murderous intent before, but usually it was aimed at his enemies.
Well. Did he really expect any different?
Yes, a little actually. He had expected Jiraiya to be angry, but this was on another level. A downright terrifying level.
Every muscle in his body tightened; he was unable to move but ready to flee, leaving his body in a painful tension.
The chakra fog grew thicker, like a syrup whose dense bitterness Naruto could almost taste. Like glue, or gum, it seemed to pull him, turning him around on the balls of his feet until he was face to face with his sensei.
Cold sweat broke out all over Naruto's body. Sasuke took one look, squeaked, and buried his face back into Naruto's jacket.
Jiraiya was livid. His eyes were wide, the pupils constricted. His hair was spread out, like the mane of a lion ready to pounce, the spikes quivering slightly, barely holding themselves back from firing.
Naruto, for the first time, saw a fat vein throbbing beneath his sensei's bangs. His large mouth, one that had smiled and laughed so many times, was now a rigid line adorning an iron jaw.
Naruto could hardly imagine what a smile on that mouth looked like.
Slowly, Jiraiya raised his hand.
Out of some strange reflex, Naruto glanced at his other arm, and promptly swallowed back a bit of bile that rose in his throat.
The Sage, with that dark, palpable aura radiating off him in waves, pointed straight at the back of Sasuke's head. The kitten flinched, feeling it as much as a tangible poke.
"What. Is. He. Doing. Here." It was a statement that demanded an answer, and promised something very near to death if that answer was lacking.
Naruto swallowed and scooted back just an inch.
"E-Ero-sennin, y-your arm –"
"Naruto!"
Naruto could not begin to describe the barely controlled rage he heard in that shout – all he knew was that moments later, his left arm was exposed to show ten distinct claw marks.
"He did it again – followed me…" A new wave of anger told him that answer was insufficient. "I tried to get him out, but the frog (he gestured to the blue creature sprawled and out cold on the 'floor' beside him) wouldn't let us get out and then we were in the water and…"
Still not enough. Naruto recognised the trap too late. The Sage never wanted an answer, and would have never accepted one.
There was no excuse.
And Naruto agreed wholeheartedly.
Jiraiya stretched out his hand, his entire body leaning forward. Naruto was going to get knocked out so hard his grandchildren would have headaches. He accepted this. For letting Sasuke come here, this is what he –
"He's my family!" Jiraiya froze. Naruto's mouth fell open a little. Sasuke turned in his arms, trembling but looking Jiraiya in the eye. "I followed him because he's my family. He said he won't leave me alone. But then he was gonna leave and I…I knew he was going to a bad place."
The kitten clenched his fists, calling up strength from only he knew where. "If he's going to a bad place, I wanna go too! My first family is dead! I don't wanna be left behind again! I'm never gonna let my family die again! I…" whether he was blushing, or his cheeks were flushed with emotion, none of the four there could tell.
"Nawuto's the same as me," he said after a pause. "You're his family. So he'll follow you to a bad place because…because… Nawuto really, really loves you! So…so…" And then he started crying.
Naruto and Jiraiya stared at the kitten. Then at each other. Then sighed, and thought simultaneously:
Musta got too much for the little guy.
Grandma toad was sniffling. Grandpa toad just looked uncomfortable.
Naruto put Sasuke on his shoulder, patting his back softly as he wailed. "There, there. It's gonna be okay. Ero-sennin's not gonna kill me anymore, look."
Jiraiya's eyebrow twitched. But the dark aura and demon-like countenance was gone. At most he looked greatly annoyed, and could still possibly knock Naruto out at any time, but for the most part, he was back to normal.
Except for his missing arm.
Jiraiya was still angry that Naruto had followed him, but he admitted (with Tsunade's merciless assistance) that it was partly his fault. He did leave the kid stranded in toad country, and really, what did he expect when he sent Gamaken back looking like that?
He shook his head, ended his chuckles with a few coughs, and gave Naruto a somewhat serious expression.
"Well, while you've had a nice little nap for the past two days, I had to endure listening to toads complain from dawn till midnight. If you're going to be a Sage, you've got to treat your Summons better, Naruto."
"I didn't –"
"You threatened Gamakichi and Gamatatsu's homes. They're not going to come when you call for at least five Summonings."
"But –"
"Then you almost cut off Gamaken-san's tongue. Now he needs even more time to recuperate. Not to mention he's the Gama brothers' uncle, so that's ten more times they won't answer when you call."
"That wasn't me who –"
"And the pièce de résistance, you traumatized Gamakawa. The poor frog's sitting on some lily pad somewhere muttering about evil kittens and blond, blue-eyed demons. He has a wife and six tadpoles for mercy's sake!"
"I'll go visit –"
"He's terrified of you."
"I'll send him some flies! Big ones! I'll go catch some right now!" He made to get off the bed, but his world spun and he collapsed back onto the pillows.
Sasuke nuzzled his face, purring softly in concern.
"You're still sick. Stay in bed." With authority, he thumped Naruto on the head with his tail.
Tsunade covered her smirk with her hand again. Jiraiya just smiled.
"Well, it's not so bad. Baa-san says he's just taking a while to recover from the effects of the genjutsu she put on him."
"The one to make him use that Frog Cannon thing?" said Naruto, sitting up again and remembering how the frog had floated in mid-air, firing out Shadow Clones in a great cascade of orange. "That was awesome. That thing made our whole strategy."
And it worked a lot better than when he tried it with a certain yellow, snack-loving summon.
"He could store all one thousand of your clones in his stomach and spit them out as quickly as needed. And his body acts as a barrier like Gamahyō –"
"You mean that toad with the cork in its mouth that looks like a toy?"
Jiraiya's eyebrow twitched. Seemed he was doing that a lot these days. Maybe it was all this time he was spending with his becoming-less-than-favourite student.
"Yes, Naruto. Him. So Gamakawa's body acted as a barrier so Pain could not sense any of us coming before it was too late. That's the only reason I was able to get so close with my Chōōdama Rasengan. The Frog Cannon was perfect. It's a technique all frogs and toads on that mountain could use, but only he and his brother brought it up to that level."
Jiraiya looked up and was surprised to see Naruto sulking.
"I coulda done more than one thousand clones. I mighta got a hit on that guy. And then we woulda ended the fight right there."
"That's naïve thinking Naruto," said Jiraiya, his voice stone. Naruto's pout only grew worse. "I cut you down to five hundred to make up for the two Rasenshuriken. Five. Hundred. You insisted on a thousand, and ended up sleeping for two days. What did you want? A week-long coma?"
Naruto was full-on scowling now, the sides of his mouth pulled down long. Ironically, he was doing a perfect Kabuki imitation, but Jiraiya did not tell him this.
It was too funny to spoil it.
"Besides, we couldn't beat Pain then, even if we did have more than a thousand."
"Because the real guy's somewhere else," said Naruto with dull anger. "Coward."
"There could be any number of reasons why he could not fight himself, why he would rely on… (he glanced at Sasuke) … Anyway, say what you want about him, he did not fight like a coward."
"Why're you defending him?"
"I'm not. I just don't want you to underestimate him. He will be coming after you again, and if you think of him the way he was when Konan took him, you will die."
"I know. I know…"
Jiraiya noticed his disheartened look and leaned back against his bed post.
"Well, I suppose one thousand was the right number in the end. Your clones gave me more than enough time to figure out Pain's techniques and confirm his identity. Though I'm still not sure about that one with long hair."
Naruto brightened.
"If Konan wasn't there, or if she wasn't going to be fighting fresh, we really could've won. But…" Jiraiya quickly cut Naruto off before his eyes brightened too much, "…we didn't stand a chance against her back there. We both needed serious medical attention, and all of the damage from my scrimmage with her was probably negated by then. If she had chosen to fight, she would've killed us."
"Why didn't she choose to fight, then? Get revenge for Pain?"
Something in Jiraiya's eyes shimmered at the question. "Because of Yahiko. Yahiko is still the most important thing in the world to them."
"But he's…"
"Yes. He's dead. But with Nagato's power, a piece of him is preserved. They'd do anything to preserve it as long as they could."
"But he's still…he can't…"
"Think of it like this. He's their Sasuke." Something in Naruto's body stopped working and grew cold. In that grey moment, before his moral senses returned to him, he suddenly, frightfully, understood them.
She didn't get revenge because Pain was more important. Someone like that is in Akatsuki…
Itachi's name suddenly resonated in his mind; he almost physically shook his head to rid himself of it.
Instead, he gathered fistfuls of his painfully white bedsheets, steeling himself to say what had been nagging him since two days ago in Amegakure.
"Ero-sennin. When Pain was telling me his plan…" Naruto swallowed. His hand absently stroked Sasuke's ears. The kitten watched him, his tail mindlessly curling.
"I understood why you couldn't leave. Why you were willing to stay there and die to find out his secrets. I – I thought the same thing. I had to stop him. I had to do everything I could. Even though I was going to lose. Even though it meant…"
Sasuke tilted his head, wondering why Naruto was tearing up. He was surprised when Naruto gathered him in his arms and hugged him close, burying his face in his hair.
"Sasuke. I'm so sorry. If Ero-sennin hadn't held me back, I would've gone after Konan and… and left you all alone. I'm an idiot, so I can't promise that I won't be reckless like that again. But I'll try really, really hard not to be. So please, please forgive me."
"Okay."
Naruto pulled back, staring at the kitten. It was that simple?
The question was so obvious on his face that Sasuke giggled. Then, oddly, he squirmed with a troubled look, as though silently debating with himself. He glanced shyly at Naruto and beckoned him closer.
Naruto lowered his face. Sasuke brought his up.
The tips of their noses touched.
It was…warm. Was this chakra? Naruto never felt chakra so warm. It was flowing freely from Sasuke, and Naruto soon realised that it was coming from him too. He had never given off such chakra before, warm and soft and…
"Naruto." Sasuke was staring right into his eyes. His so fat cheeks were light pink, but his voice was steady.
"I love you."
Naruto's eyes grew wide.
It was not that he had never felt loved. Though it happened later in his life than it should, he knew now that he had friends like Sakura and family like Ero-sennin who loved him.
But this was the first time anyone ever said it to his face. He did not know what to do. How did someone usually react when told that they were loved?
Sakura always hit him. He did not think that was the appropriate response here.
Before he could begin to figure it out, the little voice that told him precious words with ease said, "I'll always forgive you. Even if you are an idiot."
And with another thump on the head from Sasuke's tail, the moment ended. Sasuke drew back, an embarrassed but happy grin on his face.
Naruto stayed where he was, trying to do one of three things: understand what just happened, cling to whatever little warmth remained from the brief … contact … and simply get some sort of anchor back to earth so he could descend from the cloud he was currently floating on.
He could not decide. But he did find a response to those words. It grew on his face, mirroring and exceeding Sasuke's embarrassment and joy…
A smile bright enough to shadow the sun.
'How do I even say anything at this point?' This unspoken question came from the only woman in the room, who was rather touched, a bit embarrassed, and altogether irritated. 'I still have questions.'
She sighed. Subtlety was never her strong point.
Tsunade cleared her throat.
The three other occupants in the room turned to look at her, having forgotten she was there. A vein grew in her forehead; she knew full well that they had forgotten.
"Well, I have a question."
After all, Jiraiya had refused to tell her any details about his – and Naruto's – battle with the leader of Akatsuki outside of the bare minimum, insisting that it wait until Naruto woke up.
Well, he did tell her everything he knew about Pain's abilities and his identity. The autopsies on those corpses, as well as the intel they pulled from the Ame-nin yielded invaluable results.
It was the only reason she acquiesced to her old friend to wait for Naruto.
At her brief statement, Jiraiya blinked, looking halfway between nervous and grateful. Naruto's smile lessened by a fraction, but was still blinding.
Sasuke tilted his head, hoping that she was not going to give him another check-up. He'd been given more check-ups in the past two days than his Kaa-san had ever taken him to for his whole life.
"Naruto's chakra was indeed exhausted when you hauled his carcass back here."
"Yup," Jiraiya replied, ignoring the indignant huff from Naruto.
"But from my examinations, something's not adding up. Naruto, you used one thousand clones in your assault, yes?"
"Yes."
"And two Rasenshuriken."
"Yes."
"And all of your clones were wielding Rasengan?"
"Yes."
"I see. So you used it, didn't you?"
Jiraiya answered that. "Yes and no."
"How is it both? As Hokage I need to –"
"Calm down Tsuande," Jiraiya waved his hand. "No need to go waving around status. We'll explain everything."
"What's 'it'?" Sasuke asked, looking up at Naruto. He had been following the conversation as best he could, and from the little he could understand, 'it' had something to do with Naruto. And 'it' was not a good thing.
Before Naruto could think up a response, Tsunade walked up to their bed.
"Sasuke-chan," she called. Sasuke pouted. Naruto almost collapsed from shock.
Who was that who had just spoken? That lovely, sweet, gentle voice came from her mouth, but that was a lie. A blatant lie.
"Sasuke-chan, it's time for another check-up."
"Another one?" Sasuke almost-whined as Naruto looked around wildly for the hidden ventriloquist. "I don't like those. They always make me sleepy."
That's the point, Uchiha. I finished your real check-up a minute after you were put into my arms. Having you sleep just… well, it was supposed to make things easier.
Honestly. You were sleeping when I brought you to Inoichi and your appearance still almost gave him a heart attack. When I asked him to do a Mind Probe on you, the man flipped:
'No no no no no – h-he's much too young, Tsunade-sama! N-not even my daughter using the bare minimum of her chakra would be able to avoid hurting him. Even worse if he's already suppressing memories. His mind is already under strain, if we put any more on it by intruding and having him resist us…'
'But what if I put him to sleep like this…?'
'No good. His mind will still resist even if he was in a coma. It's a natural reaction; even the most trained ninja cannot suppress it. I'm sorry, Tsunade-sama, but I cannot trust myself or anyone else in my clan with this. He needs to be at least five years older before I'd even consider it.'
It really was a terrible disappointment, though she did not blame Inoichi in the least. She was glad her subordinate had the courage to disappoint her, instead of going ahead with her commands and doing irreversible damage to Sasuke's mind.
Naruto would have never forgiven her. She would have taken even longer to forgive herself.
But still. Damn it. A Mind Probe would have answered nearly everything; they would have, at the least, found out what happened to Sasuke, or indeed how it happened. It was beyond frustrating to see her last hope crushed, since her medical ninjutsu – for the first time since the Second Shinobi World War, since Dan – had failed her.
Well, she shouldn't say failed. Rather the results her tests gave her were, quite frankly, incomprehensible.
"Tsunade?" Jiraiya's call, like many of his others, went completely unheard.
If she actually took in everything her tests said at face value, actually believed what her results were telling her, then she would have to revisit the way she looked at the entire ninja world.
They were that shocking.
"Tsunade."
Was there some sort of clan out there really capable of this? Some sort of jutsu, or frightful Kekkei Genkai? Why were they hiding all this time? With power like this…
If Akatsuki got to them first…
"Tsunade…"
How had Sasuke even found them?
"Tsunade!"
Perhaps they were hiding because this power had a fatal drawback. 'Use it and die' rules.
But then, if the consequences were that steep for its use, why would they use it on Sasuke?
Or rather, what had Sasuke done to make them – whoever it was – resort to this?
"Tsunade!"
"Huh?" She snapped out of her reverie and looked down to see Sasuke staring wide-eyed at her. From his expression, he was worried for her mental health.
"Oh, sorry there kiddo. I was just thinking a little. Now what was I doing?"
Sasuke seized his chance. "You were going to go yell at Shizune-san for hiding your sake…"
"Wrong," Tsunade snapped. Observant little brat. "You were getting a check-up. Now come here."
Reluctantly, Sasuke left Naruto's arms and crawled over to Tsunade, who picked him up and held him against her bountiful chest.
She ignored the usual stab of unabashed longing and jealousy that came from the opposite side of the room.
As she held a glowing green finger to Sasuke's forehead, the kitten's eyes drooped and soon he was fast asleep. Instead of giving him back to Naruto, however, she held onto him, petting his soft hair.
This did not escape either of the males in the room, though it meant different things to each of them.
For one, it was only proof of something he already knew; that despite all she said and did, there was some part of his lifelong friend that had truly been left unfulfilled.
For the other, it was proof that shapeshifting aliens existed.
"So." Naruto sighed in relief. Jiraiya only sighed. The Hokage had returned. "Tell me how you used the Kyūbi's chakra."
"You're insane, Jiraiya-chan."
"It will work."
"Ya don't know that kiddo."
"Please trust me, Ma'am. It worked before."
"Ya call that workin'?!"
"I told you. The Kyūbi's chakra had manifested. Naruto was about to be taken over by it, but I only mentioned Sasuke and he suppressed it. Naruto has never been able to return from that point by himself before. That's why I'm sure this will work."
"Ero-sennin… I …" Naruto looked down at Sasuke, who was sleeping soundly under the effects of Grandma toad's genjutsu lullaby. Sasuke was still a child of Konoha, therefore discussions about the Kyūbi were still prohibited in front of him.
Naruto smiled and stroked his ear. The kitten purred softly in his sleep. "Ero-sennin…"
"Naruto. Back in Konoha, you did something that three years of training couldn't do. You suppressed the Kyūbi's chakra on you own. Not to get stronger, but to protect Sasuke." Jiraiya straightened, making to fold his arms when he realised that he was one short. So instead, he rested his remaining arm across his lap.
"'I won't let the Kyūbi's chakra hurt him.' That single thought was enough to rein in a partially formed Fox Cloak. That's power. Power from the overwhelming love you have for Sasuke as a brother."
Naruto blushed slightly, not wanting his bond with Sasuke to be described in such a… direct way.
"That power should let you control it. You just have to draw out its chakra while using that strength to separate the hateful will."
"I don't get it," said Naruto honestly.
"The Kyūbi's chakra is not hatred," he held up his lone hand to stop Naruto's protest. "Just as you are not the Kyūbi, the Kyūbi's chakra is not its hatred. They're intertwined, but they are two separate entities."
Naruto nodded, his eyes a little brighter. Jiraiya suppressed a smile; his student was always happy to hear people make that distinction.
"You've always had amazing healing power right? That comes from the Fox's chakra. I've told you before, but the Fourth's seal is incomplete – it lets a little of the Fox's chakra leak into yours. So tell me Naruto, whenever you're healed, do you feel any of the Kyūbi's hatred?"
"No."
"Right. The Kyūbi uses only its chakra to heal you. That proves that its will and chakra can be separated. I made a mistake in your training, thinking that you had to forcefully push back the Kyūbi's hate in order to use its chakra, like forcing a door shut against a tidal wave. But that idea is wrong... no, it's flawed. It's so obvious now, if you actually do shut that door, how do you expect to collect any water, much less use it? The slightest distinction... no wonder I missed it..."
He lowered his gaze and chuckled. Naruto blinked, the silent question as to the man's sanity unanswered.
"Uh, Ero-sennin, I still don't know what you're talking about."
"The Kyūbi's chakra and will are linked. From what I saw, your will to protect Sasuke is strong enough to overcome the Kyūbi's hatred. But if your goal is controlling the chakra, then it's a flawed way to do things. Draw out the chakra, the will follows. Suppress the will, lose the chakra. It's a false paradox engineered by that fox and it's been messing us up all this time. But it's so simple. If the Kyūbi can separate its pure chakra from its hate, I don't see why you can't do the same."
Naruto's seal grew warm, but the blond was too excited to pay attention to it.
"Complete separation. That's our goal."
A savage smile stretched over Jiraiya's face and he leaned in. Naruto's eyes widened.
"You'll draw out the Kyūbi's chakra and use your will to filter the hate. If it works, you'll have the distilled chakra of a Tailed Beast at your disposal."
"A filter... how will that work?"
"The Kyūbi's chakra is the tidal wave, but instead of your will being a door that shuts it out, it will be a filter: a filter strong enough to withstand the chakra's force, and fine enough to trap the impurities of the Kyūbi's hatred."
When he said it like that, it made sense. But Naruto still lacked confidence.
"I don't know if I can summon up that will just like that. Are you gonna say a bunch of mean stuff to me again and get me riled up like last time?"
The Sage winced at the memory.
"Ah, no. And I am sorry about that, Naruto. But it's not necessary, since you brought him along."
He pointed to the kitten, whose ears twitched as though he could sense the sudden attention. He curled up to Naruto, his face scrunched up in a little frown. Grandma toad cooed at the cute gesture, and glared when Grandpa toad rolled his eyes.
Jiraiya looked around at the warm, shimmering walls of the toad's stomach.
"Even with the time distortion in this dimension, we don't have much longer before Pain gets impatient. I don't want to think about what he'll do to this lake once that happens.
"So, I'll have to force your body and mind to learn the technique."
"How?" Naruto squirmed, rightly uncomfortable.
"You're going to call out the Fox's chakra while holding Sasuke in your arms." Naruto's face went bloodless. "If even a drop of the Kyūbi's hatred is present, you will manifest the Fox Cloak. With him that close to you, you know what will happen to him, don't you?"
Naruto nodded furiously. He knew. If the Fox got a hold of him, Sasuke would be burned by its chakra in the best case. In the worst, and most likely scenario, Naruto would lose control and Sasuke would get hurt. Badly.
An image appeared, unwanted from his mind, of Sakura flying through the air, blood flying from her arm.
Naruto swallowed something foul that started rising in his throat.
"Good," said Jiraiya without sympathy. Coddling Naruto was not going to help them here. For that reason, he did not let the blond see him pass small pieces of paper to each toad. These suppression seals were a safety net he could not afford Naruto knowing about.
"Pain's identity: this is the only way we can get that information and survive. You will guard your heart against the Kyūbi's hate, and you will filter the chakra. There's no other option for you."
Naruto nodded again, holding Sasuke closer. He closed his eyes, preparing himself.
"Naruto," he called the name solemnly, "I wouldn't put Sasuke in danger like this if I didn't know you could do it. I told you before. You can learn to control the Kyūbi's chakra. This is only the first step."
With those words echoing in his ears, Naruto took a breath, and pulled.
Tsunade stared at Jiraiya in as close a look to horror as Naruto had ever seen.
"You're insane," she whispered, unconsciously holding Sasuke closer to her bosom.
Jiraiya responded with a slowly spreading grin.
"It worked," he enunciated. Tsunade blinked. She opened her mouth.
"It's not permanent," Jiraiya quickly affirmed. "Right now, I'd bet the return of Gamakawa's sanity that his chakra's back to normal." Naruto winced at his sensei's choice of words.
Jiraiya continued speaking to Tsunade, but his eyes were on his student. A stern gaze. "It's also barely usable. Though he was able to manage something out of it, he still ended up using most of his energy to suppress the Kyūbi's will. Which is why he was half-dead when I brought him back here."
The fact that his master said this without of a hint of exaggeration made Naruto feel rather cold.
"It's a great technique, but with flawed execution it dangerously exhausts his chakra. Well, in that kind of situation, I guess I shouldn't complain but…"
Jiraiya's eyes suddenly sparkled. A small, almost awestruck smile played around his mouth.
"But it worked. I couldn't believe it."
"What?! But Ero-sennin you said –!"
"Yes. I know. And all of it is true. I do believe in you. It's just…to actually see that it worked…" Jiraiya's eyes alighted on the sleeping Sasuke. He smiled almost wistfully. "I didn't think we would actually get somewhere before your Sage training was done. (Or that I would still be here to see you grow) But now we have something we can work with. Your first step."
"Right. So what do I do?"
"Practice. Just do the same thing you did back in Amegakure once a day and improve the filter. We'll see what happens from there."
"Excuse me." Tsunade finally stepped in, holding Sasuke even closer now. "And what will happen if he does lose control?"
"Well I'll be supervising him obviously," Jiraiya was defensive, and a bit hurt that she thought him that careless.
"Having Naruto use the Kyūbi's chakra was our only hope. We needed the Rasenshuriken back there, and the only way to let Naruto use it without risk was to try something crazy."
Tsunade quieted; she knew he was right. "Now that we have a first step, we have to expand on it. Don't worry about it. Nothing will happen to your precious baby, Tsunade."
The red-faced Hokage hugged her kitten close, "H-he's not my – Jiraiya watch your tongue!"
Tsunade was stuttering? Oh great, the shapeshifting aliens were back.
Jiraiya threw back his head and laughed. He looked at Naruto deviously. "Alright Tsunade, you want something more convincing? Pain's eyes, Nagato's Rinnegan was tricked."
"What…?"
"I watched him. The moment Naruto's assault started, my eyes were on him. He never realised that the Kyūbi's chakra was in use."
Tsunade's eyes widened. "That's…"
"Impossible? I thought so too. I thought that he would know no matter what. The tainted rage of that chakra would be impossible for the Sage's dōjutsu to miss. So why didn't he recognise what Naruto was doing?"
"There was no hatred," Tsunade whispered in awe. Naruto blushed, rubbing the back of his head.
"Yes," Jiraiya was positively beaming. "It was his first time, the execution was poor, and he wasted more than half of his energy. But, in the sliver of the Kyūbi's chakra he managed to use, there was not a single drop of hatred. Looking at chakra without an ounce of the Kyūbi's will, even a god would make the mistake.
"Do you see now? This thing is real. If he keeps practicing…"
"I see… And in addition to his Sage Mode training…" Her eyes widened in awe at the image before her.
"Right?" Jiraiya grinned. "Now you're seeing what I see, Tsunade."
When Tsunade turned to look at him, Naruto could swear he saw the tiniest shimmer of fear in her eyes. But it was swiftly replaced by a very Jiraiya-esque grin.
"Well I'll be damned Uzumaki. I've got to start betting on you more often."
"Aw, thanks Baa – wait."
Jiraiya laughed again, Tsunade smirked while stroking the spot between Sasuke's ears. Naruto looked like he could not decide between being insulted or praised.
He settled for a neutral look between the two that only made him look very sleepy.
That was not an issue. He was very sleepy. He had slept for two days, and his chakra was still only halfway up to standard. That was probably the fault of his abnormally large chakra reserves; bigger container, more time to fill it up.
The adults in the room noticed. And were partially grateful that their conversations were so busy that Naruto did not have time to ask any –
"Baa-chan. You were doing check-ups on Sasuke while I was sleeping, right?" Tsunade's face, as blank as she tried to make it, must have betrayed something because Naruto blinked, waking himself up a bit. "Sasuke complained."
"Oh."
"The check-ups were tests, right? Tests on Sasuke." His drowsy eyes searched her face for any sign of consternation. "What'd you find out?"
A pregnant pause filled the room. Naruto waited, blinking slowly, on the verge of sleep but not stepping any closer. A few seconds passed.
"How can we change him back, Baa-chan?"
Jiraiya was impressed. Tsunade, in keeping with her moniker as Legendary Sucker, had a terrible poker face. Most times it would be better if she did not try, rather than the painfully obvious attempts she did make.
However, her expression now was a damn good one, one of the best Jiraiya had ever seen.
"Sleep, Naruto. I'll tell you everything personally when you wake up again."
Naruto stared. Tsunade stared back, the tiniest bead of sweat growing on her left temple.
Naruto blinked. Nodded very loosely, making his head look like it would slip off his neck in one smooth motion. He held out his arms for Tsunade.
At first the woman froze, then noticed where Naruto's eyes were looking. She sighed, scolded herself for her stupidity, walked up to the bed and handed over Sasuke.
Naruto cradled the kitten in his arms, nodded to himself this time, closed his eyes, and freefell back onto his pillows, fast asleep before his head hit the down.
Tsunade exhaled. Pulled up the blankets around the two. Silently looked at Jiraiya, who shrugged and reached for the notepad and pencil he had been writing with earlier.
"How can he be so calm about this?"
Jiraiya looked up at her, a question in his gaze. With a frustrated gesture of her hand, she elaborated.
"His supposedly best friend is now a baby cat-human! And yet Naruto just seems so comfortable with it."
The confusion she was met with surprised her.
"You think so?"
"He's better than Inoichi at least! And at least that man talked. Ibiki just stared. Stared! And I think nothing short of an invasion on Konoha would have got that man to blink."
Jiraiya chuckled. "I did the same thing actually," he admitted.
He was ignored. "Even I'm still having trouble…adjusting. But Naruto is just so calm about it!"
"Really. That's how it looks huh? I'd say Naruto is still the most disturbed about this than anyone."
"How do you see that?" she genuinely wanted to know.
"Well at first, Sasuke's appearance shocked Naruto so much that he actually went looking for answers in the library. He didn't even know Konoha had a library. And he studied. For an entire day."
"That's how he deals with shock?" Tsunade deadpanned.
"Number One Most Unpredictable Ninja," Jiraiya shrugged, his eyes wandering back to his notepad. "Even now, the way he's always holding Sasuke and talking to Sasuke and staring at Sasuke… he's still trying to come to terms with what Sasuke has become.
"He can look calm now, but I wouldn't be surprised if he's panicked a few times since he first saw Sasuke like this. 'What if Sasuke stays like this forever? How will I take care of him now?' That's the kind of stuff he's probably been thinking about. He's worried. And scared. Everything's just been moving so fast, he hasn't had time to show it."
Tsunade could not help but stare at Naruto's master.
"Jiraiya…that was…" Tsunade trailed off. Her eyes grew wide. Jiraiya smirked, his eyes roving the contents of his notebook.
"Take care of him?"
"Yup."
"Care for. Him."
"Yup."
"You told him –"
"Yup."
"You foolish –"
"Who else, Tsunade? Who else does Sasuke have to go to? Who else does Sasuke want to go to?"
Tsunade acknowledged that. If she was being honest, even Kakashi was barely a better option when it came to childcare.
But she still had her doubts. "Naruto's not fit to raise anyone. He's barely raised himself."
Jiraiya's face turned to flint. "What the hell does that mean?"
Tsunade met his look head-on. She'd faced worse. "That means I want to know if he can handle all of Sasuke's baggage. Sasuke has amnesia, and as unethical as this may sound, he might be better off without his memories. Surely Naruto has at least thought of that."
Jiraiya nodded his assent to the half-question. "So then why would he tell Sasuke about his clan?! If this is Sasuke's chance at a fresh start, why open that can of worms?"
"Because Sasuke's happiness can never be based on a lie. No matter how horrible the truth, Sasuke would not wish to stroll happily down a false path. Naruto understands that better than anyone."
"But surely he could have been spared that pain."
"For how long? The kitten has amnesia, Tsunade, but he's not stupid. He's probably been hounding Naruto about his family ever since they first met."
"How do you –"
"Because for these past two days he's done the same to me." Tsunade grew silent as stone. She had to hear this. Jiraiya took a deep breath.
"'Do you know who killed my clan?' 'Why is the district all busted up?' 'Do you know where my Nii-chan is?' Whenever he wasn't sleeping from a 'check-up' or worrying over Naruto, he'd always ask me those three things. He thinks I'm lying. I'm not. I told him I do know, but I'm not the one to tell him these things."
Tsunade's lips parted in silent astonishment. "So Naruto's been…"
"Handling Sasuke's baggage from day one. And I'd say he's doing a pretty damn good job. Better than anyone else could do, that's for sure." Jiraiya sighed, tapping a spot on his notepad with his pencil, his eyes not seeing the book at all.
"It was inevitable that Sasuke find out about his clan. So it should be inevitable that he be consumed with anger and hatred." He looked up at Tsunade, a low fire burning in his eyes.
"But he's not. The Sasuke we both knew when he was in Konoha never smiled, never laughed, never accepted anyone as family, and never had anyone to love, or rather, anyone he was willing to love.
"This Sasuke cannot even be compared to the first. And I'd bet my life that it's all because of Naruto. Whatever Naruto said to him, whatever Naruto did for him after he took him to that cemetery; it has already changed Sasuke's fate.
"This Sasuke won't be obsessed with gaining the power to kill his older brother. This Sasuke won't cut all his bonds to pursue polluted strength. As far as Naruto is concerned, he already failed once to bring his friend out of the darkness. This time will be different. He will not fail again."
Tsunade was silent. At the look Jiraiya fixed on her, her shoulders stiffened. His eyes were burning.
"If you still think that Naruto is unfit to care for Sasuke, that that kitten would be better off in the hands of 'childcare professionals' or some other such bull, then you are free to think so. And if you want the messy task of trying to separate them then be my guest. Just know one thing."
And here, The Great Toad Sage Jiraiya, Lord of Mount Myōboku and the Wild Beast of the Legendary Sannin spoke with a voice that could shake a mountain, and eyes that could evaporate a sea.
"Know that I will be the one to stop you before Naruto even knows you're a threat."
That was the voice of the man who had once promised to kill her if she ever betrayed Konoha.
A bead of sweat ran down the side of her face.
In the next instant, that man was gone, replaced by the familiar old oaf and his goofy grin. Tsunade's shoulders imperceptibly (to anyone but her childhood friend) relaxed.
"Besides, the dumb kid won't be alone. He'll have you, me and all his friends to help him. Once they get over the whole cat-human thing."
Instead of laughing, she looked at the two. Sasuke, who was so small that he lay perfectly comfortably on the side of Naruto's face and neck, slept with one fat cheek squished against the blonde's. Tsunade had only been very briefly acquainted with the Uchiha, but she doubted that he normally looked so peaceful even when he slept.
She sighed in defeat. It'll be all right for now. She surrendered with a subtle smile.
Jiraiya, all traces of anger gone, returned to his notepad and started scribbling.
Tsunade glanced at him. She would be a fool to think that he would not make good on his threat (promise) in a mere moment's notice.
But for now, he was so engrossed in his notes that she could easily be fooled into thinking he had completely forgotten about it.
Judging by his look of concentration, Jiraiya was writing notes about Naruto's new abilities, plans for Sage Training, or the rough draft of a new Icha Icha.
If it was the third option, Tsunade would hit him. There was a child in the room for crying out loud!
She walked swiftly to his side and looked. Diagrams showing what roughly looked like Naruto being surrounded by wispy curls of something.
And next to it, several drawings of some sort of shiny liquid falling in a waterfall and gathering in a small pool. The drawings had been crossed out and redrawn numerous times, as though Jiraiya could not decide whether the pool of 'something' should be included or not.
She glanced at him with a quirked brow. He returned the look with a quirked brow of his own.
She scowled. He smiled.
She raised a fist.
The smile was killed.
She sighed. Gave him a small smile and turned to leave, missing the subtle flip of the notebook's page to content she would half kill him for.
But someone had to keep the stream of quality erotica flowing. If not him, then who?
"Jiraiya."
Damn I'm gonna die.
"I can't fix him." Her back was to him. Whatever she wanted to say, they were not things she could admit to his face. Maybe others. But not him, who knew the full extent of what she was capable of.
It was too shameful.
"Everything I tried failed. I tried lifting his amnesia, but the trauma he's suppressing makes his mind so fragile! – his consciousness would almost shatter no matter how gentle I was. His transformation is completely beyond me – physically, genetically, chronologically, it's so perfect I can almost believe the Fountain of Youth is real! I can't reverse it, even when I use the power of the Creation Rebirth."
"You went that far?" Jiraiya's gasp went ignored.
He did not need her confirmation anyway: he had seen her do it before.
It was a simple concept. Chakra, the basis of ninjutsu, was a mixture of physical and spiritual energy. If one used a technique that restored the physical body to perfection, it would naturally have an effect on one's ninjutsu: medical ninjutsu being no exception.
Still, Jiraiya had only ever seen her release the seal to perform a healing once – she only did so when she was backed into a corner and had nothing else left to her but a shameless power-up.
And it did not work. She continued to lament in a blunt tone, her back turned to her oldest remaining friend.
"I literally did everything I could and it was worthless. Everywhere is a dead end and there's nothing I can do. There's nothing Konoha can do. I failed."
She could feel his eyes on her back, taking in her stiffened shoulders and rigid neck.
"Why are you telling me?"
"Naruto's counting on me to fix him. But I can't."
There was silence for a moment, then, "So what?"
"What is he going to do? At this rate, he'll be taking care of Sasuke until… until he's the age he should be now. His life just got a whole lot more complicated because I'm incompetent."
Jiraiya's eyes widened.
'So all of this is one long-winded apology. Man, she really is clumsy.'
"Tsunade," he said her name warmly, with a mild smile. "He'll deal." Her shoulders flinched, a gesture of surprise, before finally relaxing.
"I see." She folded her arms under her breasts and said with defiant air, "Well, I hope you know that I'll hold you responsible if he doesn't. You made the promise as his master."
"That goes without saying," Jiraiya was still smirking. She could tell, he was silently laughing at her clumsiness.
"Hmph!" she grunted and headed for the door. With her hand on the knob, she looked back at the Sage with one last question on her lips, and her brow slightly furrowed in concern.
"Jiraiya. Sasuke still calls him Nii-chan?"
Jiraiya blinked. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back.
"Seems that's the one truth Naruto could not bring himself to tell Sasuke about. I don't know why though. I'll ask him about it later."
Tsunade left it at that with nod, opened the door and made to step through when she froze. There were goosebumps on her skin. She slowly turned back to Jiraiya, who stared at her with a frozen expression and fingers turned white on his notepad.
He looked like he was anticipating his death. Strange, Tsunade did not think she was threatening him in any way.
She simply felt that something – bad – was coming her way at a frightful speed, and wanted to verify if Jiraiya felt the same.
Judging by his innocently clueless expression, which gave her the strange urge to punch him for barely justified reasons, he did not.
Impossible. They were both Kage-level shinobi. No one who was a Kage-level shinobi had failed to develop a vague and inexplicable sixth sense for danger.
Unless this was a danger to which she was personally attuned.
Hmm, that could be it. However, that was also a problem. She was the Hokage. Therefore she was personally attuned with all of Konoha.
But then, so was Jiraiya. All he was missing was the official title, after all.
No, she was getting side-tracked. The problem could not be all of Konoha. This thing that was coming was personally attuned to her on a much deeper level.
What could it be then?
Shizune? No. Shizune was more frantic energy, always bursting in with a problem or notice, or scolding her for one thing or another, or squealing like Tonton whenever Tsunade lost her temper.
It was not Shizune.
That only left one other person.
At that moment, the Hospital Entrance doors banged open. Tsunade was on the fifth floor, and not only could she hear the bang, she could feel the shockwaves from when the doors hit the walls.
She could also hear said walls crumbling.
Her eyes met Jiraiya's. A single glance at the sleeping duo was all the signal he needed for him to leap from his bed, hoist them over his shoulder and leap out the window.
It would be a lie if she said that seeing him do all that with one arm and his hair did not impress her.
Though he was a bit slow, but that was to be expected.
Not a second after his departure, a whirlstorm of wild pink hair and dirty, torn red fabric appeared at the end of the hallway.
Near crazed and bloodshot green eyes stared at Tsunade for a moment, before a finger whose tip was poking out of a ripped glove pointed at the open door to her left.
"There," she said ominously, like a creature just woken up from the grave, "Naruto and Sasuke-kun."
She looked terrible. Twigs and leaves (was that a caterpillar?!) were sticking out of a dull, tangled, absolute mess of pink hair. Her clothes were irreparably ripped, her bare arms and legs covered in innumerable scratches; the kind one received by barrelling through the wilderness and not caring who or what stood in your way.
Sakura took a step forward, wobbling horribly. Tsunade could make the diagnosis without even touching her.
Extreme chakra exhaustion. Tsunade estimated she had run out of her own natural chakra about six hours ago, after which she had abused soldier pills and the effects of her own adrenaline.
No sleep for at least thirty two hours. On the brink of dehydration, definitely malnourished. Shaking in the arms and legs, extreme muscle fatigue probably compounded with a severe case of hypoglycaemia.
What was this girl thinking?
"Naruto." She took another shaky step. "Sasuke-kun."
That's all she's been thinking about. Damn, I shouldn't have sent that last notice about Naruto's fight with Pain.
"They're fine," Tsuande reassured her, taking a step forward. "They're both sleeping but just fine."
Sakura stood as still as she could – the muscle tremors were out of her control.
"They're here?"
"Yes."
"Sasuke-kun's…really here?"
"Yes."
She resumed her stumbling walk forward. "I want to see them."
"They're sleeping." Tsunade repeated. There was no way she could let Sakura see Sasuke in the state she was in. The girl's shock alone would've been manageable, but like this – she might very well have a seizure.
"I want to see them."
"Sakura they're –"
"I want to see them."
"Sakura!" Her apprentice stopped, staring with wide eyes at her master. "I cannot let you see them right now. Listen, I'll tell you everything, okay? In fact, all the shinobi in Sasuke's age group need to hear what I have to say. So come with me and let's get you cleaned up –"
"Tsunade-shishou."
"Yes, Sakura."
"Get out of my way." She charged. Her fist was cocked back, powered with artificially (and dangerously) generated chakra. Tsunade gritted her teeth, ready to knock her out with one swift uppercut.
At the last second, however, Sakura turned so sharply her shoes squeaked and ran her fist through the wall of the room Jiraiya, Naruto and Sasuke had occupied a mere minute earlier.
She stared in utter shock at the empty room before her. Her eyes swiftly scanned the area. Wrinkled bedsheets, a visible depression in the mattress left over from two days of sleep in the same position.
They had been here.
As quick as a blade through air, her eyes dashed up towards the open window and fluttering curtains.
Found you.
She stepped forward.
A single chop was delivered to the back of her head with frightening precision.
She fell unconscious before she could even think up a good swear.
A/N: I hope my 'filter' idea is plausible and simple enough to understand. It went through many rewrites before I got it as 'right' as I could. Off course it's inspired by Naruto's big boss fight with Kurama - just on a somewhat tamer level.
Fun Fact: I don't like cats. I don't hate them, I just never really liked them. I'm a dog-person to my bones. Yes. I've only just realised the irony.