Snowy Princess: That means so much to me! I'm so glad I'm able to inspire and I'm thrilled to hear you've been holding your breath and are on the edge of your seat.

I'd love to hear your thoughts as the story progresses.

I apologize for the sudden unannounced hiatus... I've been working on my graduation so it is with much joy that I can announce that I have officially graduated from Art Academy! Not only that, but I've been coping with losing four family members in a short amount of time. My graduation project was done in their name and I know I've made them proud.

So I want to give some hindsight fluff! I can't wait to have more time to write now that I won't need to study anymore. I find solace in the fact that I can't study anymore as nothing can top this. Literally.

Alright, on to the story!

Always a Team Member

It was then that Yusuke experienced the true torment which had kept Kurama down. For days he had monitored Kurama in the bug, he'd sleep but those nights were always restless. Though he slept through them, waking tired and stressed, now they became bad enough to wake the redhead.

He yanked himself out of Yusuke's grasp, a position in which Kurama had finally fallen asleep and Yusuke didn't feel like moving a muscle, even if it cost him his comfort. Kurama sat up with a loud gasp, the sound and motion of ripping himself out of Yusuke's grip were more than enough to also wake the detective.

"Wha-?" Yusuke rubbed his eyes before he reached out to touch damp skin. Then the sound hit him, not only did Kurama feel abnormally warm, he sounded like he had just finished a marathon. He had woken in a cold sweat and Yusuke's senses stood on edge as his brain fully woke from his slumber.

"Hey." He started. "It was just a nightmare, you're safe." He wrapped his hand around his bicep, feeling the muscle twitch ever so slightly under his touch.

"I know that," Kurama said a little out of breath.

"Then come back to sleep." Yusuke tried his best to sound soothing. "You need to rest or else nothing will improve."

"I can't…"

"What do you mean? Of course, you can! You know they are just dreams."

Kurama stayed stoic, looking towards the wall across the room. "You don't understand. They aren't 'just dreams'. They are vivid memories replaying in my mind like a broken record and I can't get rid of them by simply accepting them to be what they are."

Yusuke was confused for a moment but Kurama continued after having taken a moment to calm himself.

"In my mind, I know that it has passed and that they are just dreams, but my body just jumps into shock. The adrenaline doesn't stop either, I can try to sleep again but I'd just be staring at the ceiling until sunrise."

Swinging his legs off of the bed, Yusuke made his way to Kurama's kitchen. He knew where everything was and he filled a glass with water. There were tablets in the medicine cabinet, sleep tablets similar to Mukuro's concoction. He contemplated just dropping the tablet into the glass, allowing it to dissolve, and giving it to Kurama without saying a word. But that felt wrong, he'd done that before and what he did still sat in the back of his mind, ready to torment him in the nights when he lay awake.

Thus he took the glass and the tablet to Kurama.

"Take this." He presented Kurama with both yet he only took the glass of water. "It'll help you sleep." Yusuke felt the memories rise and he tried his best to suppress them.

A simple shake of the head was the only thing Kurama gave him when Yusuke presented him with the tablet.

"It'll give you a dreamless sleep, you'll be able to sleep through the night."

Kurama shook his head again. "I don't…"

Yusuke's mind was going haywire, was he scared? Did he traumatize him? Did he not trust Yusuke? He had to negotiate with Kurama, of course, he was allowed to reject the sleeping tablet but it was in his best interests he take it. Yusuke saw he was scared, though it might've been the dream, there was something else, a specific type of pain.

"Is it because of what I did?" A lump was forming in Yusuke's throat as he asked him about it, the guilt he had been feeling since that day has been eating away at him. He had to know what damage it had done.

For a moment, Kurama was silent. His face was tensed into a forced look of comfort but Yusuke could see it wasn't natural.

"I'm so sorry." Yusuke lowered his gaze in shame.

"I have forgiven you for it," Kurama spoke suddenly. "But I somehow can't seem to forget."

"You don't have to." Yusuke scoffed at himself. "I've done something awful which I shouldn't have. It's okay to hold a grudge."

"I don't hold grudges." Kurama attempted a smile. "But I'm reluctant to take medication due to… Everything."

Yusuke held out his hand, the tablet still in his palm. "This will help, please do this for your own health."

He mostly stared at it but it didn't take much more time until he took the tablet from Yusuke.

"I will be here." Yusuke comforted Kurama as he placed it on his tongue and swallowed it with water.

It didn't go down smoothly, he retched a couple of times, the memories of his previous encounter with sleep medication surfacing. There was silence as he had taken it though it didn't take long before Yusuke got up, headed to the kitchen once more, and returned with another glass and sleeping tablet.

"I'll take one too." He said before he took the pill.

Kurama eyed him with a look of confusion. "You didn't have to do that."

"Of course, I had to." Yusuke shrugged. "We're in this together, got it?"

For a moment, Kurama looked worried at this statement. It was as if he didn't want to believe Yusuke to be able to stay by his side. The amount of time Yusuke had abandoned him made him want to commit to it more than ever, to not fuck it up.

…

"So Enki has won." Yusuke kneaded the sheets with his hands, he hadn't expected to fall into a prolonged state of sleep after his fight with Yomi. After the others had gone, he was left with the redhead who had graciously informed him of the tournament's end.

"He has, though I don't think any of us would mind," Kurama replied as he leaned against the wall, his arms crossed.

"And you didn't advance through the next round because…"

"Because my energy was drained."

"You were hurt."

"Only a bit."

Yusuke nearly choked on air. "No. Not 'only a bit' Kurama."

Brilliant greens stared him down as he silently grumbled inwardly. "Something's bothering you." Kurama began. "It's okay that you've lost, everything turned out okay. Maybe you can try again in five years…"

"That's not bothering me, Kurama!" He startled himself with the volume of his voice, he didn't mean to explode like he did but there was no rewind button to try again.

Kurama's physique tensed for a brief moment, relaxing again as the silence continued. "Then what is?" He asked somewhat hesitantly, weary of Yusuke's temper.

"Just, sit down or something, you're making me nervous." Yusuke motioned. He had been standing ever since Yusuke woke, the way he kept his arms crossed as if he was waiting for Yusuke to jump back to action was unsettling.

For a moment, Kurama stayed quiet. "It's okay, I'd rather stand."

"Straighten your back then! I can see you're hunched over, that's not the posture I'm used to seeing from you." Yusuke was getting annoyed at Kurama's resilience.

Searching for words, Kurama's eyes darted to the floor.

"You can't, can you?" Yusuke called his bluff.

"What do you want me to do?" Kurama visibly tightened the grip on his arms, asking his question as if he hadn't heard Yusuke's.

"I want you to quit your bullshit," Yusuke said in a stern voice. "I can see you've been standing at an angle. Why is that? Is it because you're the one who shouldn't be moving?"

"This isn't the time to argue."

"Like hell it is!" Yusuke ignored Kurama's attempt to de-escalate. "You can't straighten your back, can you?"

"I-"

"Can you?!"

"... I can't."

There was a pause as Yusuke's mind processed everything. Kurama wasn't looking at him, he wasn't looking at anything in particular, seemingly lost inside his own mind as his eyes looked through the very fabric of time itself. He could see it, the shame, the guilt, everything he always thought Kurama didn't care about. "You can't," Yusuke confirmed as he softly nodded.

"I only wanted to be here so you wouldn't be alone when you wake up," Kurama confessed.

"Why would you do that?" Yusuke was genuinely surprised at this, he hadn't felt alone ever since he'd met them.

Kurama shifted uncomfortably. "Because you did that for me too."

Yusuke was at a loss for words, his lack of response, however, did push Kurama to move away from the wall and towards the door. His arms protected his torso as his hunched position kept the strain away from the cut. He was only able to take a few steps before Yusuke's fingers took hold of his blouse. "Wait."

Stepping out of bed, Yusuke went to stand in front of Kurama. "Wait." He repeated. "I didn't mean to…"

"It's okay," Kurama whispered. "You're right, I shouldn't be moving."

"What were Yomi's healers doing all this time? Why haven't they worked on you yet?" He asked, his eyes looming around where the wound should be.

"They were tasked to pool their energy in case Yomi himself needed it."

"What?!" He belted out but lowered his voice rather quickly as he saw Kurama flinch ever so slightly. "You mean to tell me that he ordered his healers to not heal you? You're part of his team!"

Kurama kept quiet, still not making eye contact with Yusuke.

It made him worried, the fact that Kurama wouldn't look at him combined with the knowledge that Yomi had prohibited his people from healing another from his team. It was eating away at him. He didn't dare touch him for fear he'd hurt him. The nights he'd laid awake, the death plant, the bombs, it all came back to him. But other memories also surfaced. Kurama's sudden help in that damned hospital, sacrificing his own mental health by fighting game master, playing along as Kuwabara's supposed death gave him the strength he needed to defeat Toguro. The sword through the gut after which he kept Keiko human.

There was a system in place, Kurama was repaying him, but for what? Saving him and his mother? For not even catching him as he was thrown out of the ring by Bakken? For almost blasting the entire stadium away including Kurama himself? For making cruel jokes while Kurama went through the guilt of supposedly killing a child?

"I don't want you to fight anymore." Yusuke finally said it. He had had enough of seeing the suffering, the wounds which would've killed Yusuke if he was the one sustaining them. He had enough.

His words got through to Kurama as their eyes finally met. There was something within them that Yusuke couldn't quite place. "That is what I am fighting for," Kurama answered.

On one hand, Yusuke was glad he wasn't mad, he had expected Kurama to brush him away as being dramatic. But he didn't, he seemed to agree with him.

"I'm fighting for a future where I don't have to fight anymore."

Yusuke was stunned yet Kurama sounded and looked sincere. "But why do you still fight? You didn't have to go to demon world just to 'repay' Yomi for what you've done to him in your past life…"

"I had no choice."

"How?"

"He had held my family hostage, I had no choice."

"He blackmailed you…"

"If that's what you want to call it…"

"What happened after we dropped you off after your fight?" Yusuke couldn't help it, his blood was boiling, he had to know. "Did someone dress your wounds?"

"I did." Kurama gave him a sheepish grin. "I used the little amount of energy I had regained to start the healing process. Of course, that small amount wasn't enough, I only got to stop the bleeding. I dressed it myself."

"I haven't seen anyone heal you besides yourself…"

"Sometimes my condition isn't serious enough to need immediate attention." Kurama grinned again, but there was an inkling of disappointment.

Yusuke mirrored it. "I should've been more attentive."

"This isn't something you can change."

"It is."

"If you say so…"

"Sit." Yusuke reached out his hands to offer help but Kurama stayed on his feet.

"In all honesty, if I sit here now, I won't be able to get up quickly by myself." Kurama shook his head.

Yusuke scoffed at the remark. "You don't have to get up, and if anyone tries to hurry you up they'll deal with me first." His hands finally made contact with Kurama's shoulders. "Sit."

Finally accepting Yusuke's offer, Kurama nearly slid down the wall, leaning against it as he loosened the tight grip his arms had around his torso. There was no red, nothing had opened up and Yusuke was glad it didn't.

"I will call in my healers."

"No." Kurama declined. "You're still not patched up and…"

"And you're worrying about someone else again. I'm going to be fine. I rarely force you to do things but for now, I'm forcing you to accept this." He got up and opened the door only for people to immediately answer his call.

"Sir, we cannot heal members from rivaling teams." One of them said as they questioned Yusuke's request.

"He's not from a rivaling team, he's part of my team and will always be part of my team now get to it."

Thank you to all my readers up until now, writing is my way of relaxing, of clearing my head and it is absolutely joyous to share my mind with all of you!