Supernova

By Willow Athena

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or any of its characters, but Rien and this story are definitely mine

Author's note: I kinda wrote sort of a poem for this story. I wasn't sure if I should publish it separately or not, or try to fit it in somewhere. I decided to put it in the story, it's called Languishing, and I'll indicated where in the story I have put it cause it has a different metre than the rest of the story (obviously, considering it's a poem). I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 17 – Heaven and Hell

The darkness was peaceful. There was no pain, no anguish. Rien had been at peace. She laboured away, trying to get her soul to abandon its lingering affection for life. This is better, she thought. The nothingness, it's peaceful. She felt weightless in this place, light.

She felt her soul finally give in to the peace. She felt rested, finally free. Pale white lightening struck her weightless form. It was hot, like electricity pulsing through her whole body. She pushed it back somehow, resisted its pull. Where did it want to take her? She did not want to leave. Rien felt confused for the first time in weeks. The lightening, though hot, did not hurt, it felt more like a warm, safe, comforting glow.

There were renewed sparks of the lightening as it called her name. She knew its voice. Then, another arc of the lightening hit her, harder, and more intense than she had expected. She wondered if this happy feeling was the heaven she had read about – her paradise, her happily ever after. She allowed the lightening to pull her weightless body towards its joyful source.

She had been content with the darkness, the nothingness. She had never expected heaven, but she would not ponder her invitation, just joyfully accept it.

(Languishing - poem)

She was delicate and deadly. Perhaps just dead. Intertwined in his scarlet thread, the tension taut, about to snap, fling her away. Discarded without care, like an unwanted gift that repulsed him. The electricity between them charging the static of the air, threatening to destroy any soul between. Moving closer, a shifting polarity – inevitable …

Repulsion.

Her every movement already dictated by his every breath. Her heart – no, HIS…turned to fragile crystal by disuse. Shattered upon impact. She longed to be rid of any affection for him. She longed to be driven by nothing. She longed for him.

She was entangled in love. Was it really love? Perhaps it was hate. She hated his every perfection, the way it taunted her, the way it sucked her in…how afraid she was to taint the perfect silver of his skin with her blood.

He could not hurt her anymore. Not in this place. His love like a black hole, taking but never giving. She was safe here. Without him – a searing, aching pain worse than death. Perhaps it was hell. Heaven and hell were useless concepts, everywhere was hell without him. Hell…it was easier than life without him.

Resignation.

His attack, inconsequential compared to his defense. Encasing, suffocating loneliness – a lethal parasite draining life from the living. She had welcomed the blade, dull in comparison to her need for him. A muted after-image of pain.

In these delusions, she was alive, with him, always…why did the torture hold such fascination, such vitality for her. She was dead after all. Finally free of the shackles he placed on her. She had hurt herself trying to break free of him. But, there was no pain in death, just nothingness.

Relief.

A lingering affection for life. She could not forget him, could not leave…he quickened her. Blue blood racing crimson, rushing towards him, and away from her. He pulled her close to him, from the brink of destruction.

Resistance.

It was futile. Futile to resist something she wanted. More than life. More than death. Nothing more than perfection. Nothing more than him. Giving in. To her.

His lips were unmistakeable. They were perfect copies of the real ones. Soft, wet heat claimed her in an eternal kiss. Was this her heaven? To have him hold her close and lovingly kiss her for all eternity? This was all she had ever wanted in life – for them to love eachother. How ironic, she thought, that she should attain it in death.

Her heaven was beautiful, and she would never leave its perfection.

Her lips slowly became responsive beneath his, and she was surprised by the stiff ache of the movement. She felt his eyelashes brush her cheek, like a butterflies wings. She opened her eyes to find him gazing at her with emotion-filled eyes as they kissed. He let his eyes slide shut once more, as his right hand secured her against his urgency.

His left arm on her back, crushed her willing body against his chest. Rien felt her body become warmer, felt his heart beat faster, and lingered in the smooth chocolate taste of his tongue. She wondered at the reality of it all, the crispness of her senses. She yearned to touch him, to feel his silver skin against the gold of her hands, but, her limbs felt heavy, and difficult to move. She finally managed to lift her right hand to his silken neck. His skin felt soft, hot, and real. She could not contain her enthusiasm for the perfection of this paradise.

She ran her hand up his bare neck to his jaw. It felt like static electricity, as the feeling pulsed through her body, as she touched him. Her breath came in wild gasps as she held him closer to her with all the force she could muster, unwilling to relinquish the kiss and deepening it still.

Her skin burnt, her lips were on fire, her heart pounded in her ears, her lungs ached for air, and for the first time – she truly felt alive.

How ironic.

His despair turned to hope at her sudden response. Her lips now willingly parted to welcome his kiss. He opened his eyes to see her arm materialise again, and then, her soft, liquid eyes staring back at him lovingly. He closed his eyes, vowing he would keep her here, with him, that he would not let her go back into the darkness he had felt.

How could he have convinced himself that he did not care, that she did not matter to him. She felt so familiar to him, like a piece of himself he never knew was missing until she was there and he felt whole. Only to rip the piece out himself, out of fear, out of weakness. He felt himself become whole once more, in this moment with her. It would kill him now – if she died – she would take him with her, as it should be. He would not be left alone again, incomplete and inconsolable. He had never felt complete before this moment, not until he had given in, to what he did not know, but he also didn't care – for once.

As he intensified his kiss, he felt her respond with a similar need fuelling both their movements. The strawberry taste of her on his tongue was intoxicating, and caused him to relinquish control. The tingling sensation from her cashmere touch made his heart race. He had never before been touched by such tender softness. His heart yearned to feel more of her tenderness, desperately wanting to fully experience the love her kiss hinted at. A love that belonged to him alone. She was his, he could feel it – feel her body ignite beneath his, her hand tangle in the length of his hair.

He wanted her.

His heart raced, and pounded at the door to his chest. He gently lay her down on the bed and shifted his position to match. His hair, as wilful as ever, cascaded over the kenseikan, like a veil over them both, shielding them from the external world. He caressed her velvet cheek with, his now free, right hand as he kissed her. She let out a soft moan of pleasure and his heart inwardly triumphed. He kissed her more deeply now, memorising what she liked, what she enjoyed, all the while becoming more intoxicated by her taste and the lavender scent of her skin. She moaned within his kiss once more.

He felt the air rush past his own lips as she gasped.

He pulled away from her, only managing to retreat to the empty space next to her. He lay breathless on the pillow, relishing the extra air filling his lungs, clearing his head, and allowing him to concentrate and control himself. He had not realised that he had lost so much control, that he had been doing it until then – he had released about a quarter of reiatsu. It must have been suffocating her, he thought, as he listened to her quiet gasps for air. Though his breathing was laboured, her need for air was significantly more urgent.

What was he thinking? Perhaps he wasn't thinking at all. He inhaled deeply, to try to hold all his reiatsu back in but, her strawberry-lavender infusion was distracting. As soon as he was able, he sat up.

What had he been thinking? He knew better, he berated himself. He finally managed to successfully hold all his reiatsu back in. Her breathing had, by now, become far easier. He could not bare to look at her, fearing she would shatter his resolve. He was happy she was alive but, this could never happen again – he didn't even know how he had let it happen this once.

What was he thinking!

He had long since forgotten about the intensity of emotions that could cause him to lose control, but he could never lose control like this again. It was dangerous, the people he cared about would get hurt. He remembered the volatile emotions he had had to lock away, along with his childish exuberance for life. He remembered the way the force of his uncontrolled reiatsu had evoked fear in his classmates, had caused his father to force him to control it, the years of training it had taken to seal his true force away. He shuddered to think of what it would do to her if he lost control, let even a petal touch her. He could not trust himself with her, and because of that, she was dangerous.

He cut himself off from his emotions once more…he was in control.

He stood up, not looking back at her. She was too fragile, too breakable to even be in his presence.

No more, he promised himself, yet again.

He knew that others would be there soon – the hour was almost up. He knew he looked a little dishevelled, that he had not mastered his composure yet. He would not wait for them to arrive, to see him like this, to question him. He had no answers, just lips that burned with her taste, and that, they would already know.

He shunpo'ed to his office for his spare change of clothes – no one should see him looking like this. As he showered the strawberry scent of her from his body, he wondered why she had not tried to stop him from leaving. But, it was a useless thought, like many he had had that day and so, he shook it out of his long wet hair.

Air rushed in with a wild gasp as he pulled away from her. She wanted to stop him, to hold him to her forever, but her hands were still heavy and would not obey her commands. She found her mind's need for air amusing, considering she was dead, but it felt so good filling her lungs. Her body felt so real, as had his – it was mind boggling.

She heard Byakuya breathing heavily next to her, jaw clenched in concentration, she wanted to reach out and touch him, to relax him, but her arms would not obey, like dead weight pinning her. She felt drained, as if she had no energy, and wondered why her muscles were so sluggish to respond.

The perfection of her heaven was something to be marvelled at, not questioned.

He suddenly got up and left. Her body would not respond, her voice stuck in her throat – she had no time to stop him. Why had he left her? A sickening feeling began to rise in the pit of her stomach, a heavy weight on her chest, a sneaking suspicion…hell, perhaps? Was this her punishment for the pain she had caused others in life – to have him constantly ripped away from her. Like a band aid, he had clung to her, and then slowly, torturously, removed himself from her.

Author's Note

Phew…Who knew one kiss could take up a whole chapter – LOL. Did I mention how hot I think he is? If not…Yum. Love him, love him, love him…was that out loud? Remember to check out my FF VII story if you like.

Please review if you liked these chapters, or even if you didn't. Let me know if I'm doing something right, or if I should change anything. Any good ideas are always welcome. This is my favourite chapter that I have published so far, let me know if you guys have any favourites.

I hope you guys liked the poem. And yes, I am a review whore, but, I do find them excessively encouraging and helpful…so please continue.