A/N- for those of you still reading this, awesome, I appreciate your loyalty to the story and the characters. For those of you who abandoned this story because of the last chapter, well, I'm writing this is hopes that you'll read it just to see what happens. This was a hard chapter for me to write and it's one of the longest of this story. Cheating is a situation I've been hurt by, and I have seen people hurt by. While I place no judgement on people, I know many of the emotions that it causes. The next chapter is going to hurt a lot, too. I hope you guys find this realistic, because these are emotions that are true to things I've felt and watched people I love go through. Reviews are welcome, kind or harsh, they always make me consider how to write the next chapter. Please enjoy.

When Regina woke up in the morning and saw that Emma wasn't in bed with her, she assumed she had slept on the couch, either from not wanting to disturb her or maybe her wife was still mad at her. She pulled her robe over her pajamas and walked down the stairs to check the living room. When she didn't see Emma she checked the couch in her study, still no sign of blonde hair. The uncomfortable feeling in her stomach from the night before made Regina panic wondering if something had happened to Emma. She picked up the phone and called the only person she could think of that might know where Emma was.

"Granny's Inn, what can I do for you?" Granny answered.

"Hello, this is Regina. Is Ruby around?"

"She's at the diner this morning. Anything I can help you with?"

"Did my wife stay there last night?"

"Yes, Ruby brought her in late last night, she was pretty sauced. You guys having a rough time?"

"No," Regina snapped, her response too quick to reassure Granny of the refute. "If you see her, tell her to hurry home?"

"Will do." Regina hung up and dressed herself quickly, heading to the diner. She had to work, but she wouldn't be able to until she knew where Emma was. When she got there, Ruby was at the counter and her eyes went wide when she saw Regina. The waitress looked like she hadn't slept and Regina felt a tinge of sympathy for her.

"Where is she?" Regina demanded.

"Probably puking in the bathroom. She got really drunk last night. I took care of her," Ruby reassured. Regina waved it off and walked to the bathroom to find Emma standing in front of the sink and splashing water on her face. She smacked the blonde on the back of the head so that Emma looked up into the mirror and saw her wife standing there with a mix of anger and worry on her face.

"What is wrong with you?" Regina spat, then scrunched her nose up and leaned in to inhale by Emma's face. "God, you smell like a distillery." Emma moaned, turning to look at Regina properly. "Now that I know you're alive, I can go to work. Enjoy your day." Regina's tone was hot with disgust and she stormed out of the bathroom and the diner.

Emma walked out of the bathroom and over to Ruby. "Coffee, please." Ruby nodded and placed a cup filled with the dark liquid in front of her and then walked away. Emma was going to order breakfast but Ruby didn't come back to her for fifteen more minutes.

"Ruby. Please, I need food." Ruby walked over to Emma again and stared at her coldly; narrowing her eyes in a glare that would rival the ones she used to get from Regina.

"Order," the brunette waitress said coldly.

"Ruby, are you the one who gave me my room last night?"

"Yes."

"Did I go in alone?"

"Yes."

"Oh, thank god." Emma's body slumped at the realization that she had, in fact, slept alone last night.

"But you don't deserve to feel relieved. You came in with Neal pawing all over your body, asking for a double bed. What is wrong with you Emma? Regina's your wife!"

"I know…I…my judgment was off. I can't even remember most of the night and I think I blacked out. You know I would never do something like that sober."

"Yeah, well, you shouldn't get so drunk that your judgment is completely impaired and you'll bed anything with a pulse."

Emma sighed, she knew Ruby was right so she gave the waitress a nod. "But you're sure I went in alone?"

"Yep. I sat outside your room the entire night. Not that one would think you were alone, what with all the animalistic noises I heard coming from there."

"Noises?"

"Oh yes, and screams."

"Did I say anyone's name?"

"Regina's. A couple of times."

"Oh, Ruby that makes me feel so much better," Emma said in a relieved whisper.

"Yeah well, you don't deserve to feel better. You're going to tell your wife, aren't you?"

"I know I have to. I've been a really shitty wife the last two weeks and as much as this is going to hurt her, she deserves to know. Maybe this will be better in the long run, she can kick me out and find a wife or husband who isn't broken."

For the second time that day, Emma was smacked on the back of the head. "Don't be stupid, Emma. Regina's not going to divorce you. I'd say you're probably stuck on the couch for a while though. You and Regina have made it through some tough shit, you can make it through this."

Emma paid for her coffee and went home to shower, tossing her clothes from the night into the hamper. After she dressed in fresh clothes and headed to the station, she received a call from Henry.

"Hey ma, I can't get ahold of mom, do you think it's cool if I hang out with Grace today?" he asked when she answered the phone.

"You can't get ahold of mom? Did you try her office?"

"Yeah, and her cell."

"Ok, I'll figure it out, but yeah go ahead and hang out with Grace. Have a good time, be home for dinner."

They hung up and Emma changed course to go to Town Hall. She stormed into Regina's office, again not waiting for the secretary to tell her she could. Once again, she found Regina crying in her oversized chair. When the brunette saw her, she wiped away the tears and threw the blonde a glare.

"Uh…Henry was trying to reach you. I told him I'd check on you," Emma offered.

"What did you do, Emma?" Regina asked in a small voice.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I know you better than anyone. I've spent years learning and memorizing every part of your face and the look you've had since this morning is one of guilt."

"You don't think I just feel guilty for staying out all night?" Emma tried, not wanting to have this conversation when they were both supposed to be working.

"No. If that was all you would have been rid of it this morning after I saw you." Regina looked hard at Emma, but her eyes displayed her vulnerability. "Did you cheat on me?"

"No!" Emma said quickly, and then rethought her response. What she did with Neal, the little of it she could recall, would still be considered cheating in both her and Regina's eyes, so she continued. "I guess, yeah, a little bit," Emma whispered guiltily. Regina broke down into tears, looking to be in more distress than Emma had ever seen her before. She wanted to comfort her, but knew that trying to would only upset her wife further.

"What…what d-does th-th-that even mean?" Regina choked between sobs.

"I uh…I made out pretty hard with…uh…with Neal, I guess. I blacked out sometime during that I guess, I don't really remember much of last night. I was pretty wasted. Probably still am a little bit."

"If you don't remember it, how do you know you didn't sleep with him?"

"Uh…Ruby. Ruby made Neal leave me alone and sat outside my room the whole night, I guess. That's what she told me."

"Why him, Emma? Why?'

"I was drunk and he was there. I know it sounds like a stupid excuse, but you have to know I would never do something like that if I had control of myself."

Regina nodded, just barely. "I just don't understand. You tell me you forgive me, but you can't sleep with me. You argue with me, but kiss me goodnight and hold me all night. You don't defend hateful words from your mother and make me feel like, like I'm some sort of slut and then you do this."

"Regina…I…I do forgive you, and I hold you every night because I love you and having you in my arms at the end of each day is the best feeling I've ever known. I can't have sex with you because…well because right now it's still uncomfortable and I can't stop the thoughts that plague my head."

"Why were you able to, that one time, on the couch?"

"David wasn't staying down the hall from us."

"That's what has been bothering you?" Emma nodded. "Why couldn't you just tell me that? I would have understood, I would have stopped pushing."

"I didn't want you to think that I was trying to get you to kick him out or anything. He needs a place to stay, so he stays. I'm sorry you thought it was still you. I just...the images are worse when I've seen him recently and with him staying down the hall and eating dinner with us each night, they're kind of always there."

"Ok."

"Ok?"

"I can't…I can't talk about this anymore right now. Emma, go to work. We'll talk at home, after I've had enough time to think about this. I love you, Emma, but this is…this one is going to be hard to come back from." Emma nodded and slowly turned, walking to the door. Before she left the office she looked back at Regina who was looking away towards the wall, her fist against her lips, her eyes filling again with tears. Emma felt her heart break for the pain she had caused her wife. She shook her head at herself and headed to the station.

Ruby brought Regina lunch a little after one, setting it on the other brunette's desk and sitting across from her.

"Thank you, dear, but I'm not sure I can eat right now."

"I understand that, Regina. I do. I'm sorry you're going through this. But you need to eat if you're going to keep her healthy."

"What?" Regina asked, her head snapping up to look at the younger brunette.

"Your daughter. You need to make sure you take care of yourself for her."

"Did Snow tell you?"

Ruby shook her head. "Wolf senses, remember?"

Regina nodded slowly until her thoughts cleared and she realized what Ruby said. "Wait…my…my daughter?"

"Oh," Ruby looked at her apologetically. "You didn't know?"

"It's too early."

"Oh, well, she smells like a girl."

Regina chuckled. "What does that even mean?"

Ruby shrugged. "I don't know, she just does. She's gonna be beautiful, Regina. Just…take care of yourself, ok? And call me whenever you need someone."

"Thank you… I will." Ruby stood to leave Regina with her lunch and her thoughts. When the waitress was almost to the door, Regina spoke again. "And Ruby?" the younger woman turned. "Thanks. I mean for...for not letting it happen."

"Of course. I'm not happy with Emma right now, but if it helps at all, she wasn't Emma last night. I've never seen her like that and I've seen her drunk before. I don't know what she was thinking; actually, I don't think she was thinking. You two are the strongest women I've ever known. You can make it through this. And if not, you have me. You have Tink, too, so don't be too stubborn to ask for us."

Regina nodded and Ruby left her alone.

When Regina went home that evening, David was in the kitchen starting dinner. She told him he didn't have to do that, that she would cook after she changed.

"Nah, I've got this. I'm not great at cooking a lot, but there are a few dishes I can do. I'm assuming by how Emma acted all day at the station means that you two need to talk. Henry's in his room. Take care of what you need to do, and dinner will be ready in about 45 minutes." Regina nodded and headed to her bedroom. She found Emma sitting on the edge of the bed, wringing her hands together. She looked at the blonde for a minute, but walked past her into the bathroom. After she came out, she sat on the bed.

"Emma…I think that we should see Archie."

"Ok."

"You aren't going to argue with me? You said you'd never see a shrink when I suggested it after Neverland."

"Yeah, well, that time I hadn't just potentially screwed up the best thing that has ever happened to me. I'll do anything to make this better, Regina."

Regina nodded. "I'm not sure it's best for Henry to be around Neal right now."

Emma considered this before disputing it. "Regina, we can't punish Henry because Neal and I were stupid. That's not fair to him. I have no problem staying away from him, but we can't punish our kid for what I did."

"I don't want him near that…that person." Regina's voice was raised. She didn't know that raising her voice would bring Henry to the door to listen. She didn't know that Emma would be ok with never seeing Neal again for the rest of her life, both because of the guilt it would bring and because of the anger. But she continued. "I hate him, Emma. In this entire world, in all the realms, I've hated few people, so few people, despite everything I did, I was angry, yes, and I hated the world, but I didn't hate individual people. I couldn't even hate Snow White, and I still can't. But I hate him. If it had been Hook, or Whale, Jefferson, even, I wouldn't be nearly as upset. Yes, I would still be hurt because of what you did, but this…Emma, choosing someone you once loved, the person you created our son with…that just, is so cruel."

Emma's voice was low and broken when she responded with another "I'm sorry" but Regina just shook her head. The brunette moved to her closet and changed into capri leggings and a simple white t-shirt, reminding herself that she needed to get maternity clothes. Her clothes were probably too tight before pregnancy because that was how she liked to wear them; they were definitely getting to be too tight for daily wear now that her stomach was growing.

"Regina, please…I know it's too much for me to ask you to forgive me right now, but please, please don't stop loving me. I…I can't be without your love, I can't be without us."

Regina shook her head as she exited the closet to reenter the main part of the bedroom. "I couldn't ever stop loving you, Emma, but this…this is big. This is…too much right now. I can't look at you without hurting." Emma nodded before lowering her head and standing up to walk toward the door. Regina grasped her bicep as she walked past her. "Emma, just because I can't, doesn't mean I don't want to. I'm not giving up on you. But there are things we will have to talk about, with Archie mediating, before we're us again." She leaned her forehead against Emma's, wishing that the past two weeks had never happened. She wished they could be on their honeymoon and be blissful a little bit longer. Well, she thought, everyone always says the first year of marriage is the hardest. She scoffed darkly at her own thoughts before shaking her head at Emma's questioning look. The women heard David call up the stairs that dinner was ready and they made their way down to the dining room, not noticing that Henry was just a couple of feet away from their door, angry tears on his cheeks.

Dinner was quiet, too quiet. David tried to get Henry talking to break the tension. He asked his grandson about his day, getting one-word answers and shrugs. He tried bringing up the topic of Tink and how she was getting on as a teacher at the school, but that conversation dropped dead when he remembered whom he had heard that from.

David tried to discuss the silly calls he and Emma had received all day from random citizens wanting help finding their pets or pulling in their laundry from outside, but nobody was talking. Finally he just gave up and started eating his mostaccoli. After everyone finished eating, Emma asked Henry to take care of the dishes. He glared at her defiantly and David nudged him to go do it.

"Do you guys want me to go with Henry for the night to Granny's or something?" David asked gently, earning a shake of the head from both women.

"No, David. You're fine here. It's nothing to worry about."

"Ok. Well, do you want me to have Neal take him?" Emma flinched at her father's question and Regina pursed her lips, but before either woman could verbally respond, Henry was back in the dining room.

"I don't want to go to Neal's. I don't want to have anything to do with him." Both women's eyes snapped to Henry's as David watching his daughter and her wife. "How could you do it, ma? I know you're mad at mom, but why did you think being with dad would make it even? That was crueler than anything she's ever done to you!" Henry was shouting at Emma, crying. He wiped his tears away angrily, upset with himself for letting them fall, he was a teenager, teenaged boys shouldn't cry over stupid stuff. But this was his family. They had all finally gotten their happy ending and it was falling apart.

"Henry," Regina scolded, not catching the wide-eyed look David was giving his daughter. "What have I told you about eavesdropping?"

"I don't care. I'm mad, I've never been so mad in my whole life. Not when you lied to me, not when she lied to me about my father being dead, none of it. Sh-she cheated on you!"

"Henry, this isn't your fight. This is between your mom and me."

"No! Stop treating me like a child! You told me about you and grandpa because you knew I'd find out eventually. I was gonna find out about this eventually, too. So, tell me!" David stood up to excuse himself, but Regina told him to stay, earning a stricken look from Emma. She told Henry to sit and swallowed audibly.

"Henry, your mother got drunk after we fought, and yes she made a stupid mistake, but she didn't sleep with your father, so…it's a mistake that I can forgive. People make mistakes Henry, and while I hardly think it's the same situation, Emma forgave me for keeping the truth from her about the thing with David, it's my turn to forgive her."

"But, she did it to get back at you!"

"I didn't," Emma whispered before Regina could respond. "I didn't premeditate it, kid. I swear I'll never say anything truer in my life. I was mad, and confused and way too drunk to be considered coherent. I'm not saying that excuses my behavior, I'm just saying that I really didn't do it to get even with your mom."

"Henry…if you don't want to see Neal, you don't have to. But if you want to, I-I understand," Regina added, hating that Emma had been right about it not being fair to take away something from Henry.

"I don't. I don't ever want to see him again," Henry vowed. "I spent too long believing you were evil, not standing by your side when you needed me to, mom. Not anymore." Regina winced slightly at memories that flooded her thoughts.

"I love you, sweetheart," she said, motioning for him to come to her. She kissed his forehead. "Go play your video games or watch some TV, ok?" He nodded and left the room to the three adults.

"Ok, so, you know I get him being here for that and all, since he brought it up, but why was he told to stay," Emma asked, pointing her thumb toward her father.

"Because if he had left the room after Henry spoke to you like that, he would have left believing you had slept with Neal and it would have been an awkward conversation that neither of you would ever desire to bring up. While, again, I'm not excusing your behavior, I know it doesn't feel good when your parents believe the worst of you." She stood up to take her dishes to the kitchen, grabbing Emma's and David's as she walked by them, figuring they might need a minute alone. She concentrated hard on cleaning, trying to let her thoughts focus on the task at hand.

"So…um…what happened?" David asked. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. Not really. We fought, I got drunk, Ruby rented me a room at the Inn and refused to allow Neal to go with me, and apparently sat by my door all night to make sure I didn't do anything stupid."

"Oh."

"Yeah, I actually don't remember anything much because I think I blacked out for a good portion of it, but when I woke up this morning all I could remember was Neal and I was half undressed and I really thought I had slept with him. And it was the worst feeling I've ever experienced in my life. The thought that I could have, drunkenly would have, it's too much. I can't believe Regina didn't kick me out and draw up divorce papers already."

"Regina lost her first love to death, and she's…she's suffered a lot, but you know that. I don't think she would let you screw this up, not without trying to fix it first."

"You know what the funny thing is? I've been the one denying her, pushing her away even though I told her I forgave her. I've been the one not wanting to sleep with my own wife, even though she wanted me. If either of us, it should have been her going out and sleeping with someone else, not me, or not almost me."

David's face reddened at the uncomfortable topic he was discussing with his daughter. "Regina's a loyal person. I think you probably could have denied her for the rest of your lives and she still wouldn't do that."

"Thanks for making me feel worse," Emma grumbled.

"That wasn't my intention. I just mean that she's a loyal person; she'll try to make your relationship work. You've both done things wrong, you've both uncovered life altering truths about each other in the past two weeks, but if you both try, I think you guys can fix it. True Love and all that, you know."

Emma nodded and put her head on the table, wanting to do nothing but hold her wife and cry.

That night, Emma made herself lay awake the whole night. She tossed and turned on the couch, knowing that Regina was awake by the strong and painful emotions she was feeling in the pit of her gut. But she wouldn't let herself sleep. She knew she deserved to feel the pain that Regina was feeling at her hand. She got up and pulled out the legal pad she had used the other day and started drawing. She drew goofy pictures of them, comic style. She drew herself kneeling and begging forgiveness and Regina watching her with wide eyes. She flipped the page over and wrote a note for her wife on the back before sliding it into an envelope and creeping upstairs to slide it underneath their bedroom door.

When morning came, Regina opened the envelope once she saw it and rolled her eyes at the picture Emma had drawn. It was cute, that was one of the reasons she had fallen in love with the blonde. She noticed a graffiti-style arrow at the bottom of the page and flipped it over.

My Regina,

I know I don't deserve you. I'm sorry for what I did, I really, truly am. But since you're letting me stay and not asking for a divorce, I'm gonna prove to you how much I love you. You deserve that and so much better. You're really the most beautiful person I've ever known and I think one of the reasons I fell in love with you so hard is because you love so deeply. More deeply than anyone I've ever known and I'm lucky that you chose me, because if you didn't love so deeply, I know I'd have been kicked out of the door by now.

My sorry isn't enough, I know. But I promise you that I'll be here, I'll be waiting and ready when you are. I'll put everything I have into fixing things when we see Archie, because you deserve the best. I'm not the best, but for some reason you want me and who am I to tell you otherwise? We've done things that no other two people have done together, and that means the world to me, so we're gonna make this work. Give me hoops, Gina, because I will jump through them all to show you that I can be better for you.

Your Emma.

Regina put the letter in her nightstand drawer and cried. Somehow, seeing it in writing made Emma's promise seem much more real. The promise that Emma had made while looking at Regina's face contorted in pain and wet with tears had seemed, though sincere, almost like a reflex. This promise, written and delivered while Regina was sleeping, it seemed like so much more. It seemed like hope.