Chapter 15

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph! So the plaque application was a forgery too?" Ted asked.

"Appear so. The signature on the form compared Holly's police personal file are like night and day" Steve said pulling up both of his screen side by side for Ted and Kate to see. "The forger didn't even try to make it appear to be Holly's signature."

"Like it was done on impulse yet the rest of the details were filled out without a flaw. Typing the application and only having the signature done by hand means finding who wrote it much harder" Kate said looking back and forth between the screens.

"So the forger either messed up the signature by accident but got away with it, or they did it on purpose so it couldn't be traced to both them and the real Holly. If it was the latter then why was the plaque so important to have them fill it out?" Ted asked.

"That's what we need to figure out. I've requested that it be looked at with more detail in case there is any information that can be gathered from the signature. Hopefully in the next few days we will hear back. What do you think on the name anomaly in the diary? Also, how did the 1974 diary get to Gwen?" Steve asked.

"Don't you remember the last letter to Gwen?" Kate asked and Steve shook his head.

"There are so many I've lost track. I need to create a chart or something to follow it all in order" Steve muttered.

"A few days before he disappeared he sent a box of his things to Gwen asking her to look after them because his place was being decorated so he had to move his things out. The diary was in it. He itemised the box and told her that he expected to get all of them back. Even itemised the number of toothpicks he had in a smaller box."

"Bit much" Ted commented.

"No it makes sense actually. In his diaries pre 1970 Christopher tends to complain that Gwen had lost something of his or moved things. He's constantly telling her to stay out of his stuff. So if he sent her a box of stuff he is going to want it back" Steve said surprising Kate and he saw the expression on her face. "Have you not read the early dairies?" he asked and she nudged his arm much like Lottie did as a habit.

"Well let's see what happens with the handwriting analysis. I want Liz McAndrews found and questioned. Let's see what our trip to Manchester produces" Ted concluded and both Kate and Steve nodded.

"What are you up to tomorrow night?" Alex asked Lottie after they had been hanging out at his flat for the afternoon. He was changing the vinyl they had just completed with another whilst Lottie packed up her college work and stuffed it in her backpack. Alex's flat had become their regular go to spot when they wanted to talk away from anyone and they could just be themselves. Steve had no idea and she always claimed to be at college studying when they hung out which technically she was doing just not on campus. Lottie enjoyed the new space for her to study given it was so quiet despite the music. Christopher would give her space in the small flat to focus and she would respect his space too for his university work and music he was producing. The good music and company was an added bonus.

"Nothing. Just hanging out at home. Steve is in Manchester tomorrow so don't know what time he will be getting back. Why?"

"I was thinking that we could go to the cinema, maybe go out for dinner after …" Alex said and then fell silent. She waited for what came next but nothing. She stopped packing her stuff and turned to him.

"Are … Are you asking me out on a date?" she asked a little nervously.

"If I said yes, would that be weird?"

"Surprisingly, no. Can I ask you a question?" he nodded. "Why would you want to go on a date with me?" she asked confused.

"Are you serious?" he chortled with a smirk. The smirk faded when he realised she was genuinely baffled at the thought. She wasn't fishing for compliments or playing a trick. "Let me answer it this way. What was the most underrated song in recent years?"

"Easy answer. Follow You Down To the Red Oak Tree by James Vincent McMorrow released 2010" she answered without hesitation.

"That's the reason why, right there. I don't want to regret having let slip the chance to date one of the most extraordinary, talented, intelligent and passionate women I've ever met."

Stunned silence. She opened her mouth to speak but didn't know what to say so she closed it. The air between them became awkward. She put her backpack on her shoulder quietly.

"Ok, I'm getting the feeling that what I just said was a big mistake and you're now highly uncomfortable so I'm going to suggest that we forget I ever said anything" Alex said looking to the floor embarrassed. He crossed the room to head to the kitchen but when brushing by her he felt Lottie reach out and grab his wrist stopping him. He turned to face her and as he did she went up on her tippy toes to match his height and let her lips lightly brush against him. She went back to her usual height and let him go.

"Usually boys call me pretty before anything else. That's the moment I know not to trust them. No one has ever said what you did to me before … thank you" she said looking at his chest, a bit too embarrassed to look at him in the eye.

"It was the truth. For someone who is quite bold you are surprisingly low in confidence" he observed.

"I guess I have a lot of growing up to do still … I have to go. I'll see you later." With that she headed straight to the door as fast and possible and left, closing the door behind her. He heard the bang of the outside door closing before he moved.

"Shit" Alex hissed knowing he was alone. Half an hour passed and a knock came at the outside door. Not expecting anything to be delivered or anyone to visit him, at first he ignored it but the knocking grew persistent. He walked downstairs to the outside door and found Lottie.

"Hello again. Long time, no see" he said leaning up against the doorframe folding his arms.

"Can I come in? I need to talk to you" he gestured for her to do so and she stepped inside. She closed the door behind her and they stayed at the bottom of the stairs a few feet away from each other.

"I was an idiot. Well maybe not an idiot that is quite a strong critique of myself. I … I should have been honest with you. I haven't been on a date before." She paused to gauge his reaction but nothing came. She thought he would at the very least laugh and call her pathetic but no. "Boys think I'm pretty and nothing else. They think I want flowers and girly things when I don't ... well apart from bath bombs but that is because I like them. They think I read chicklit when I like true crime. They think I am a delicate flower when I'm not … I'm not easy to love Alex. I'm a pain in the ass a lot of the time. I can't control my emotions. I feel everything at full force. I don't like people touching my stuff or getting involved in my business. I'm pretty sure I'm prone to depression. More recently … I found out some stuff that could greatly impact my future. I can't talk to you about that yet, but given time I may be able to. Finally I don't even know if I deserve to be loved. So there! That's me in a nut shell. The girl I've not allowed you to see the full details of. You can run to the hills right now or any point and I wouldn't blame you or hold it against you for the matter … I just had to let you know so … there."

A pregnant pause fell over the two. "Why do you think you don't deserve to be loved?" he asked and she shook her head.

"I can't talk about that. Not now. It takes time to get in my trust circle. I need time to get there with you in a different level than so far. Like I said, run to the hills and I won't hold it against you … never with you."

Alex nodded. "Good to know. Can I tell you something?" Lottie nodded nervously. "I'm not scared of you or the prospect of something happening between us. I think you deserve the world. Or at the very least –"

He quickly stepped forward, put his arms around her waist and pulled her into a passionate kiss. She responded to it quickly closing her eyes and brining her arms up around his neck. She felt him request entry to her mouth with his tongue and so let him responding with her tongue too. They continued in this position until they naturally pulled apart for breath. Alex leant back slightly so he could look at her smiling face.

"Sorry, I should have asked you if that was ok for me to do that."

"It was fine, really" she reassured him.

"To say you don't date you sure as hell know how to kiss" Alex remarked making her giggle.

"Just because I don't date doesn't mean I have turned down kisses. Those are two different things."

"So tomorrow?" he asked resting his forehead against here.

"It's a date."

Steve was surprised to see Kate when he opened the door to the flat. He wasn't expecting her and was confused by how she got into the building without being buzzed in.

"Hi, wasn't expecting you" he said with a smile.

"No, but I was" Lottie said from behind him.

"You aren't the only Arnott with my number" Kate remarked and Steve stepped aside to let her in. The two women hugged each other.

"So do we have any outlines on looks or are we going from scratch?" Kate asked taking off her coat and Steve took it from her to hang up. She smiled with a small nod to him as a way of saying thank you.

"From scratch. Everything I try together just seems wrong or not seasonally appropriate" Lottie explained.

"Got you, ok let's do this."

Steve watched the two heading for Lottie's room utterly confused. "Shall I put the kettle on?" he asked as a way to possibly get in on the conversation but it didn't work. Both women just gave him their orders and walked into Lottie's room closing it behind them. Music began to play as he made the drinks so he wasn't able to hear the conversation. He heard the lyrics from Taylor Swift's recent album Red. He took the drinks to Lottie's room and nearly dropped them on opening the door. Lottie was messy but this was a whole new level. It looked like a bomb had hit her room. There were clothes everywhere, on every surface as well as accessories and he could feel his neat freak state of mind about to explode. Kate was sat on the bed and Lottie was holding up a couple of skirts for her to judge.

"What the hell is all this?" he asked making room amongst a load of thin scarves on her chest of drawers to put the mugs down.

"You might as well tell him. You know what will happen if you don't" Kate advised and reluctantly Lottie nodded.

"Alex asked me out on a date tomorrow night … and I said yes" Lottie explained nervously. Steve put his hands in his pockets, pursed his lips and then slowly nodded. Kate could see he wanted to say something to stop her and wondered how white his knuckles were in his pockets right now from clenched fists.

"Right …" he said and didn't know what to say next. He looked to Kate as if to ask for advice on what to say. Locking gaze with him, she tilted her head and raised her eyebrows as if to tell him to say something nice. "That's great" he said with a smile and everyone in the room knew he was lying.

"You could sound a little more enthused" Lottie commented.

"Sorry I just don't know how to respond to being told you are dating someone."

"I'm not dating Alex I'm going on a date. Different things" Lottie clarified.

"Well I think it's great. And I am here to help pick out an outfit. No boys allowed" Kate said and gestured for Steve to leave.

"You know, I could give advice from a male prospective" Steve suggested and the glare he got from both Lottie and Kate told him he said the wrong thing. "Ok I'm going. By the way, whatever you wear will be perfect." Lottie gave him a genuine smile and she felt better. He closed the door behind him as he left.

"Kate, how did you know that Mark was the one?" Lottie asked after forty-five minutes of picking out outfits. That question threw Kate. Five years ago Kate would have found that question easy to answer. Now it was the hardest. Lottie didn't know about the tension, arguments and the walls of silence they each had built around their son Josh. So Kate put on a brave face and remembered back to good times.

"It's going to sound silly but it was when we took a trip to Weston-super-Mare one summer and we were sat on the grand pier eating chips. I can't remember what we talked about but there was one chip left. We each insisted that the other have it and the decision came to split it. So Mark breaks the chip in half and gives me one. The then breaks the tiniest bit of his half, eats that and then gives me the rest of his half of the chip. That's when I knew."

"That's really sweet" Lottie smiled as she tried on a pair of earrings.

"Why are you asking?" Lottie sat down on the bed opposite Kate. Serious girl chat time Kate realized.

"It's Alex. Lately he's crept up on my mind and now he's all I can think about. I'm not all gushy teenage puppy love that is so embarrassing to see in public. Given that we haven't even gone on a date yet there is no way in hell I would ever call it love. But then I haven't been in love before so I don't even know what it means. I just feel like we get each other somehow. I don't know how else to explain it but I feel safe with him. Is that crazy?"

Kate shook her head. "No, not at all and I think your way of expressing that was very mature of you. It's ok not to know how to express yourself or properly define your feelings either whether that be before your first date or several years into a relationship. I know you hate to hear it but you are just sixteen. There is absolutely no rush. You have the benefit of time and the slow burn is better than the mad rush, trust me. Just promise me something. Don't compromise who you are for anyone because you are so special Lottie. You deserve the world."

Lottie wasn't expecting that and she smiled broadly. "Alex said that to me today too."

"Then you know he tells the truth." Lottie leant over and hugged Kate.

"You deserve the world too" Lottie said holding her friend. When the two parted Lottie took a deep breath. "I never realized how complicated things get when you start feeling things you never knew existing within you."

"It means you're growing up. Please don't grow up too quickly. You may regret it one day" Kate warned.

"You sound like Steve!"

"Good I'm glad. Can I ask you something?" Lottie nodded. "I don't need to know details but if you are considering taking things further with Alex in the future, you will talk to me won't you? I'm only asking so I can give you advice. I'm not here to stop you."

Lottie nodded. "Just so you know I'm not ready to have sex in any form. It kind of freaks me out."

"That's ok. I remember being terrified at my first time, but then I gave in and let it happen when I wasn't really ready. Be sure you are and if Alex isn't happy with that then you know you didn't give him you entirely. That's a precious thing, giving someone your heart and soul so make sure you pick a good one."

"What if I pick the wrong one?"

"Mistakes happen from time to time Lottie. They make you grow and learn the complexities of human nature and life in general. I'm not sure I believe in 'the one' but I think I believe in soul mates. The person who knows you so well that combined you could be one person. You trust each other implicitly and they come in many forms but you'd be incomplete without them. Just take your time and say no if you aren't ready."

"Don't laugh but I always thought that you and Steve were soul mates from the way that he spoke about you in our phone calls and such. I really meant it when we had that chat in your car. I am so glad he has you in his life. He has a wonderful best friend in you."

Kate smiled. Yeah … friend she thought and didn't tell Lottie how she really felt about him. Finally the outfit was picked and Lottie stepped out into the living room wearing it. Steve smiled broadly.

"Beautiful" he said and Lottie blushed. He then looked at Kate who was looking at Lottie smiling. Beautiful he thought as he watched Kate.