Me: Cheese seems to fail with you guys (unless you reviewed the last chapter, which showed that not all hate the cheese). Noted.

This is: I Can't

It's basically a pre- Percy/ Rachel romance, which is what I meant by 'cute friendship/ romance drabble'.

I don't own PJO.

AU and all human.

Rachel, Percy

Summary preview: Gods gift from above.

I can't remember the exact day that I decided that Percy Jackson was a person of interest.

I just remember looking up one day, and thinking, Does he look sad?

Because that expression on his face was so similar to sadness, but the class clown Percy Jackson could never be sad... right?

Apparently he could. I watched silently as his face went from somewhat composed to a quick crumple before he jogged off the track, yelling at the coach something about the bathroom.

My best friend Eliza stumbled into my back when I stopped running to watch.

"You okay?" she asked, glaring at me slightly, holding her nose.

"I.. yeah. I'll be right back, okay? I've got to go to the bathroom." I flashed her a grin.

"That time of the month, you know?" and then I jogged off, ignoring her mocking laughter.

"Where are you going, Dare?" Coach Willis yelled after me.

"Tampon!" I yelled back, and giggled at his suddenly red face.

I entered the gym quietly, looking for evidence of where Percy really was. I wasn't entirely sure of what I would say to him- after all I had spoke to the guy maybe five times in my entire life- but I was sure I could work out something.

I started walking slowly towards the door and heard someone take a deep breath under the bleachers.

I peeked under, and saw Percy sitting on the ground, his head in his hands, taking deep breaths.

"Are you... okay?" I asked and mentally cursed my stupidity. Yes, Rachel, he is sitting under the bleachers alone because he is bursting with happiness.

I am such an idiot.

Percy's head shot up, and he got this kind of scared look on his face, until he saw I wasn't a teacher or anything. Then he just looked annoyed.

"Do I look okay?" he snapped.

"Well, no. You look kind of terrible, actually." I replied, crouching down under the bleachers and moving towards him.

Percy rolled his eyes, then sighed. I watched his shoulders slump as a weary expression came over his face.

"Sorry. I just... nah. It doesn't matter." he apologized, shaking his head.

I sat down beside him. "You can tell me, you know."

He gave me a slightly disbelieving look. "I barely know you."

I raised an eyebrow. "The perfect reason to tell me. Why should it matter? It isn't like I have anyone to tell it to."

Percy snorted. "Ah, but Dare, I've seen you around school. You have plenty of friends. You're our drama club star after all."

"Let me rephrase that. I have no reason to tell anyone else. I like you well enough. I'm not about to go telling everyone that I saw Percy Jackson crying under the bleachers. And if you even hear a hint of it, you have full permission to blackmail me with something completely untrue."

"Why do you even care?"

I gave him a sad smile. "You looked like you could use someone to talk to."

"Last I checked you aren't a psychologist."

"You just killed my secret dream."

"Yet you still won't leave." Percy said in a deadpan voice, though traces of sadness leaked through.

"Nope." I answered popping the 'p'.

Percy sighed again, and seemed to curl up a little bit more, placing his head on his knees, and his arms around them.

"Well okay. My mom- you probably heard of her, her name is Sally Jackson-"

"Is she the one who wrote that series on Greek mythology?" I cut him off, a bit of my fangirl ties to the book getting the best of me.

"Yeah. The very same. Anyways, she- she- God, I'm such a wimp. She was admitted to the hospital yesterday, after she collapsed at a book signing. Something about the part of her brain that controls things subconsciously started to not work because of a tumor. It- the whole brain not working thing plus tumor- is seriously fatal, and not usually fixable. She's on life support right now, thanks to my dad's oh so generous funding, but the doctors can't keep her on it forever. She isn't breathing on her own or digesting things, and that leads to a lot of painful deaths." Percy explained, his voice getting softer and softer the closer he got to the end, until it was barely audible.

I was horrified.

"Oh my God. That... that is just... I'm so sorry, Percy."

"Yeah, I am too." he answered dryly, but his eyes were closed.

"I... wow. Come here." I said, and leaned over to give him a much-needed hug.

Percy stiffened instantly, but he didn't pull away. That in itself was telling.

We sat like that for a long time, Percy leaning against me. I think he actually fell asleep right before the bell rang.

Percy pulled away, and gave me a small smile. "That, my aspirating psychologist, is the bell."

"Way to be obvious, my new found client." I replied. Percy's smile turned a little more real.

"Thanks. For everything, you know? It means a lot."

"No problem Percy. You need to talk to someone, come find me. My lips are forever sealed." I answered, and crawled out from under the bleachers, with Percy at my heels.

"I just might take you up on that. See you around, Dare."

"Later, Jackson."

"We have got to stop meeting like this." I said, leaning in the doorway, looking down at a hiding Percy.

Percy glared up at me from his spot behind the cafeteria curtains and a wall. "Shhh. They might hear you."

"Who? Your imaginary friends?"

Percy snorted, then shook his head. "My fan club. They have this weird ability to be able to stalk me no matter where I go. Now, sit or leave before they see you talking to what is suppose to be nothing."

I gave a loud sigh just to bug him, but sat down beside him, closing the door behind me.

"Do we need to have an emergency psychology meeting, or are we just going to sit in this awkwardly small space in silence for the rest of lunch?" I asked after it became apparent that Percy wasn't going to say anything.

"Nah. Well, at least I hope I don't. Mom's... going into surgery today. Trying to get the tumor out and all that. If it works she should be able to come home soon. If not..." he trailed off then gave a bitter chuckle.

"If not I will probably be moving in with my absent father or living on my own. I hope for the latter, but will most likely get the former."

"I feel the need to hug you again. But I'm not going to, because my arms are already squished. Sorry."

Percy raised an eyebrow. "You are random. But that's okay. With you it's nice."

I smiled at that, and fully embraced the warm feeling Percy's compliment gave me.

Then heels walking towards us could be heard.

"Go, go, go!" I whispered, starting to shove Percy under the curtain so we wouldn't both be caught. Percy gave me a bewildered look before he was gone, I had just enough time to debate on going after him when a teacher opened the door to the left of me that had been squishing my arm.

"What are you-? Detention Ms. Dare!"

I sighed.

I started hanging out with Percy more, mostly during lunch and snuck moments in P.E.

I learned that his favorite color was blue, he love the beach more then almost anything, his dad was some rich tycoon that had never even sent a birthday card to acknowledge Percy, and that his mom was awesome.

I also learned that he had ADHD, pretty much ran the 'popular' crowd if you want to be stereotypical because of his natural funny streak and over all good-guy personality, and wanted to go to college in New Jersey. Princeton, actually.

In return, I told him about how I was fairly ignored by my father (I did mention that it was only because he was busy, but I could see the doubt in Percy's face), and how my mother had died two years ago from leukemia.

I explained him how I loved losing myself completely in a painting, disapproved of my father's company, and how if I was to choose a big college, I would like to go to Julliard.

It was a close, total-trust friendship, even if we didn't really tell other people about it.

But then again, we stole each other's freetime so much, we didn't exactly have time to explain where we were and just who we were with.

Most people wouldn't understand anyway.

"What will I say? Do I need to be quiet? Are there certain rules I have to follow? Oh my God, what if I-"

"Rachel. Breathe. It'll be okay. And no, just don't mess with anything that is hooked up to something. Try to exercise your social manners that I know are buried somewhere deep inside you." Percy grinned, and caught my arm that had been about to punch him.

Percy, in one of his rare thoughtful moods, had decided that I should meet his mom now that she was finally off life-support, and mostly just in the hospital because of the cancer.

At first I had been excited. Fangirl tendencies, and all.

Now I felt that if I breathed too loud, my writing idol would order for someone to chop my head off.

Which, of course, I know she wouldn't. From what I've heard about her, she is just as awesome as I always thought.

Still.

Percy watched as I calmed myself down, got us the visitor passes, and showed me the way to Sally Jackson's room.

She was reading a mythology book when we came in. But at our footsteps, she checked her page, and looked up at us.

Her eyes lit up as she smiled at Percy, before glancing at me.

"Hello Percy. You brought a guest, I see." she said, a light teasing tone to her voice.

Percy gave her his easy grin and looked back at me. "Mom, this is my friend Rachel."

Ms. Jackson raised an eyebrow. "The Rachel you've been talking about?"

I smirked as Percy blushed. "Ah, yeah. Rachel, this is my mom."

"Hello, Ms. Jackson. I should probably inform you that you are talking to one of your fangirls. I just loved your book. Seriously. I think I've memorized parts of it."

Ms. Jackson laughed. "I'm happy to hear you enjoyed it so much. And please, call me Sally."

I nodded, and she gestured to the area closer to her.

"Come here, Percy, and tell me about what has happened since I last saw you." she told him.

I watched Percy walk over to his mom and take the seat beside her. I listened as they bantered over little things, how the topic of her illness never came up, and how Percy's face lit up when he talked about a new record he had set in the pool at his house.

He clearly loved his mom a lot, and if only for his sake, I hope she got better soon. It would kill him to go off to Princeton (if he got in) with her still like this.

Eventually Percy noticed what time it was, and Sally told him to go take me home and then go home himself.

"It was lovely meeting you, Rachel."

"You as well, Ms- Sally."

Then we were gone, but even then Percy's good mood didn't fade.

I was putting my books away so I could finally go home, when someone covered my eyes with their hands.

"Guess who!" a familiar voice asked with a childish sing-song voice.

"Eliza, I will hurt you if I can't see within the next few seconds." I answered in an equally sing-song tone.

"Way to be grumpy." she told me, but I could see again, so her brief irritation was worth it.

"So what's been up with you lately? I mean, we both know you end up missing for the weirdest of things, but I usually know the reason and where and it isn't for a solid two months at a time. But do you ever answer my texts anymore? Nooo."

"Are you ranting? Because you sound dangerously close to ranting." I countered. Eliza gave me an unamused look.

"Stop avoiding the question."

"Stop obsessing. I've just been busy with other things lately. No big deal."

Eliza smirked. "And was business with the ever so popular and sexy Percy Jackson?"

I raised an eyebrow at her instant success.

"Was it that obvious?"

Eliza shrugged. "He was missing from lunch yesterday. I heard one of his fangirls complaining that he's been missing from lunch a lot lately, just like a certain someone. It wasn't that hard to put two and two together."

"I know I should feel proud of you for finally stepping out of your self-inflicted shell of oblivious-ness to everything that doesn't concern you, you shallow girl, but I don't."

Eliza laughed. "You know it's just the role for the next play."

"A role you have been using for the past three months. I can't wait for the play to be over with. Maybe then you will finally understand that I just don't approve of your priorities." I informed her, but rolled my eyes to show that I wouldn't push the conversation into a fight.

"Priorities of the damned are never what we truly imagine them to be."

I instantly turned left, and saw an amused Percy standing beside me. I ignored Eliza's blush, and instead favored Percy with my clinical look. I was actually surprised to see him there. We usually tried to catch us with our other friends during the school day.

"Did you just call Eliza something with a ruined soul?"

"No. I was just throwing in my opinion on your already soulless topic."

"Psh. 'Your opinion'. As if. You likely read it from somewhere, or heard it from that girl you always pair up with in science. Annabell or something."

Percy laughed. "Annabeth. And don't go acting jealous, my uncertified psychologist. She isn't out to steal your job. Annabeth just has decent humor, and an epic way of teaching me things so that I can actually somewhat understand what the heck I'm doing. Unless she feels like insulting me." Percy explained.

"Uncertified psychologist?" Eliza asked, grabbing my arm before I could successfully put enough distance between us so that I could walk off un-awkwardly with Percy, and therefore, avoid her questions.

"Yep."

"Rachel... you go to a psychologist."

Percy snorted. I glared.

"You know that I haven't since I was six."

"Why on earth would a six year old need a psychologist?" Percy asked, that stupidly amused expression still on his face. Eliza smirked.

"Her hamster died."

Percy bust out laughing.

"Oh, shut up. Both of you. It was a very tragic period in my life." I grumbled, but was biting back a smile.

Percy just laughed harder. After a few moment, I smacked his chest, and pulled Eliza with me as I started walking towards my car.

"W-wait! I still need to ask you something!" Percy yelled, before jogging to catch back us with us.

"Ooh. I knew it! You're going to ask her out, aren't you? You guys would be such a CUTE couple!" Eliza exclaimed, with a malicious glint in her eyes.

So this is my punishment for not telling her about Percy sooner. Utter humiliation by public hearing, and an awkward Percy. Great.

Percy just blinked a few times, as if the idea hadn't even entered his mind (and didn't that just send a stab of irritation and humiliation through me), before he shook his head.

"Nah. It's not like that. And God, won't this sound like I'm asking you out after that question, but rest assured Rachel, I'm not. I'm taking you up on your offer of psychology. I'll meet you at the same place, same time." he told me, smiled kind of sadly, and then walked off.

Offer of psychology and same place... ? Oh!

Of course. Under the bleachers during gym. Right.

I ignored Eliza yelling at me while I ran towards my car. If she was going to be a vengeful cow then she could just deal with my silence for awhile. I had more important things deal with.

"Yes Dad, I'll be home in a few minutes... I'm almost done getting dinner items you conveniently forgot to tell the maid to get... Yes Father, I know about your paranoid considering your M&M addiction and that you don't trust anyone else to know you eat so many. That's why I never complain about you always sending me out here when we have plenty of maids that could do this job just as well as I could... Yeah, well you can deal. I got them so be happy. I've got to go... Bye." I sighed, closed the phone, and started unloading the groceries into the trunk of my car.

"Dare?"

I didn't even bother turning around this time. "Are you stalking me, Jackson? Because I have seen you a creepily about of times today. It's starting to get repetitive."

It was quiet for awhile, so I finally turned around to see what was wrong.

Percy just looked kind of torn. "I- sorry. I'll see you around at school, okay?" he said, turning to go inside the store. And that's when I saw that his eyes were bloodshot again.

Well hell.

"Wait! I'm sorry, that was a jerkish response. Come here, for a second." I said, watching to see if he stumbled over anything.

Percy didn't. Well drunk was out for the moment.

"You okay? Your eyes are all... blood-shade. You look like crap, as a matter of fact. What happened?"

A tug of his lips, but not yet a smile. "Just got back from the hospital."

Oh God. No, no, no. Don't let this be happening.

"And?" I was almost afraid to ask.

"Random accident in the lab. The cells reacted wrong and attacked. She died before the medication wore off." he told me, a bitter, lost edge to his voice that I had never heard. "The funeral is going to be soon. I'll be sure to give you an invitation. She would want you there, I think. She liked you a lot, at least."

"Oh my God. Come here." I replied, and tugged him into a hug. Percy stiffened at first, but unlike the first time this almost deja vu scene happened, he returned the hug with a crushing hold.

I could hear his jagged breathing, and simply because I didn't want to be the starter of some sob fest outside our local grocery store, I held back my tears as I rubbed his back.

"Come on. We are going to talk about this, you know." I informed him when his breathing had gotten better, dragging him towards the passenger side of my car.

"My car-"

"Will be picked up tomorrow. I'll do it myself. Now get in."

"Where are we going?"

"I would say Madison Square Garden, but frankly that place creeps me out at night. We're going to my place. Ignore my father. He's only out for the M&Ms."

"Rachel-"

"M&Ms are in the back." I answered, and in moments he was gone. I pulled Percy out of his hiding spot and silently snuck him up to my floor, where I sat him near the painting section.

He looked exhausted. I didn't really know how to bring the topic back up, so instead I grabbed my art scrapbook and a few loose drawings.

I set them in front of us, and handed one to a depressed-looking Percy.

His eyes widened. "You drew this?" he asked his voice hoarse.

"Drew, painted, sketched, captured the picture, whatever. If you see artwork in this house, I did it."

"Wow." he said, and slid the book towards him. I watched as he flipped through the images, and knew that honestly, he wouldn't be this interested if it didn't take his mind off his mother's death.

But it did, and that helped him for right now.

He stopped at one for a long time, then shook his head.

"Is this suppose to be Poseidon?" he asked, showing me one of my more recent pictures. I had painted it after reading a Greek mythology book Sally recommended to me that day in the hospital.

I frowned. "Yeah. What do you mean 'suppose to'?"

Percy raised an eyebrow. "We look scarily alike. In fact, he looks almost exactly like my father."

I looked back down at the painting and then back up at Percy before realizing he was right. They had the same hair, skin, and body type. I had even matched their eyes.

The only thing that was really different was the age.

"Oh. I hadn't even notice. No need to freak out, I'm still not part of your fan club."

A soft smile crossed his lips, before it crumpled and he closed his eyes.

Damn it.

"Oh God, I'm an insensitive jerk, and a crappy psychologist. Not to mention a horrible friend."

Percy kind of laughed, kind of sobbed, and I patted his back again.

"You know, I'm usually not this much of a wreck." he told me, through jagged breaths, and a few tears.

"Yeah. I know."

And that was all we said.

I woke up on the floor, my head against Percy's chest.

How the flip did I end up like this again... ?

I looked down at the a fore mentioned guy, and the salty patches where his tears had hit his shirt before I remembered.

Cancer death of Sally. Right.

His eyes opened up with a hint of confusion, then crushing remembrance.

"Hey." I whispered. Percy sat up and gave me a nod of acknowledgment.

"Hey. Uh, thanks. For you know letting me stay... I'm trying to think of a way of saying this without coming off as a complete perv."

I rolled my eyes. "You're such a guy. But seriously, no problem."

Percy gave me a almost smile. A few seconds later it disappeared with that depressed expression taking it's place. "I guess I have some relatives to call..."

"Yeah..." I trailed off, trying to think of something to say to break the silence that had descended.

"Can you... can you come with me? As moral support, you know?" he was hesitant and self-doubting. His blush proved it.

My eyes lit up. "Yeah. I would love to."

Percy stood up and held out his hand.

Without hesitation, I reached up, grabbed his hand, and laced my fingers through his.

I would help him through this, if for no other reason then to see that smile of his cross his face more often the it would otherwise.

Me: Remember when I said this would be cute? It seemed that the cuteness failed.

Sorry about that.

This chapter is surprisingly long. Weird considering I wrote the majority of it in one sitting. (like 3,000 words).

Next Chapter: Are You Challenging Me?

~ Anna/ Booklover98