Lissa's morning had been business as usual, yet quite a pleasant one.
She had gotten up nice and tardy, spent some time reading interesting and highly educational textbooks on stave theory and practical uses, doodled some simply masterful pictures into a notebook, and rounded out the midday by participating in teatime with her dearest friend, Maribelle. As always, Maribelle had picked out her favorite tea, a citrus blend, and even explained how she knew that Lissa would like it! Lissa did not even know that she liked citrus blends, but Maribelle had been able to figure her out just by observing when she commented on the flavor! Maribelle knew what Lissa liked better than her own self!
She had to admit, she was going to miss this relative calm, because tomorrow, she'd be waking up bright and way-too-early to travel with the other Shepherds to Regna Ferox, on a super secret, top priority mission to help Ylisse!
It was rather exciting, actually. Lissa had never traveled outside of Ylisse before, so she had no idea what to expect. What would this new location be like? Would the people there be totally opposite to Ylisseans? Would it be hot, or cold? What would the wildlife be like? So many questions!
But those were all concerns for the future!
As for what Lissa was doing in the present? That was simple enough. She was tip-toeing around the outskirts of a pond illuminated by the calming Spring sun, searching for a very specific thing, for a highly specific reason, holding a comically large net... She hadn't found what she was looking for yet, but it was only a matter of time! The creature she required wasn't exactly a rare one!
And also… speaking of unexpected things, she was ultra curious to see how Lunearc would adjust to his new position in the Shepherds.
Oh right, on the topic of Lunearc...
Lissa had to admit, when it came to him, she felt rather… ignored.
Despite living in close proximity—inside the royal palace, the two had barely spoken to each other over the two full days they had been at the castle!
The only times they'd managed to chat at all was when Lissa brought a meal to his office, but even then, he'd quickly find a reason to dash off to do something else!
Sure, he probably wasn't trying to be mean or anything, and sure, he was busy with all his important tactician and training stuff, but it still was quite annoying!
It had been a lot easier to gain his attention when he was always within an arm's reach of a prank…
However, for Vaike, getting Lunearc's attention didn't seem to be a problem at all! According to Lunearc, they had trained together, went out together past sunset to go to some unnamed location… and even went to the baths together on a separate occasion…?! What was going on between those two?!
Were they simply becoming fast friends, or was this something entirely different…?!
All Lissa knew was that if Lunearc wasn't careful, he could become just as brainless as the Teach! The Shepherds certainly didn't need another muscle bound jester, one was more than enough. And the literal tactician of the Shepherds needed to be at his very best in terms of mental faculties!
Regardless, it certainly seemed like Vaike was being picked over her. An enraging fact. And completely unfair!
Clearly, Lissa's previous efforts had not been assertive enough in gaining Lunearc's attention!
So, because of all that, Lissa had been hatching up a devilish plan that surely gain her the spotlight!
With a hearty swipe of a net into the pond, Lissa now had acquired exactly what she needed to drive this goal forward! If she played her cards right, she could even make Lunearc's hilarious shocked face appear once more! She hadn't seen his hilarious expression since the falling into the pond incident, and she was itching to see it again!
Tossing the fresh catch into a bag, Lissa hopped away from the pond, happily humming to herself as she imagined just how he'd react to this surprise!
Lissa was pretty close to the Shepherds' garrison right now, so taking a quick detour there would be a well-advised, and gave her a great opportunity to say hello to everyone that was there, and get some intel on Lunearc's current location.
And in the possible chance that Lunearc was there, it was all for the better, because then she'd be able to unleash her surprise in minimal turnabout time!
Not delaying any longer, she traversed to the garrison in record time, and blasted open the doors of the building, and slipped inside.
In the main room, a few of the usual Shepherds could be seen, with Miriel—the red-headed mage with the long flowing robe, wizard's hat, and shining spectacles, being immediately visible. Behind her, Sumia, Stahl, and Vaike were all present as well.
The three seemed to be discussing something of interest, all with the countenance of muted concern and worry.
Lissa, of course, had not realized this by the time she had decided to speak, having not nearly enough time to read the room upon her arrival.
"Hi everyone! Good afternoon! How are we all doing today, excited for tomorrow or what? I know I am! Also, have any of you seen Lunearc around? He's probably elsewhere, but it couldn't hurt to ask!" Lissa energetically exclaimed, flapping her arms around for no particular reason, before pausing and tilting her head when the grim atmosphere of the room finally reached her, "Hmm...? What's with the long face, you all? If you all keep looking like that, your expressions may stick like that permanently!"
"Well see… that's exactly the problem! We've not seen Lunearc much at all today. It's like he up and disappeared!" Vaike responded, in a tone that was serious, completely opposed to his usual demeanor.
"I actually did see him briefly in the morning, as he was training on his own." Sumia uttered, explaining her experiences with the wayward tactician, "I tried to reach out to him, but he certainly didn't seem to be in the mood to chat… when I brought up some books that could be interesting to read, he just about ran off as though he had remembered something important…"
"Oh, you experienced him like that as well? Miriel and I spotted him at the dining hall, and invited him to join us." Stahl responded to Sumia, expanding with his own experiences, "He immediately apologized and left to eat his meal elsewhere… Did you see anything interesting of note, Miriel?"
"According to my observations, the subject under trial had a negative affliction, based upon his insomniac preferences, likely built upon a foundation of distress." Miriel spoke, without taking her eyes off the dictionary-sized novel in her grip.
"What does any of that even mean? Teach doesn't understand you well!" Vaike scratched his head, confused immensely from Miriel's vocabulary.
"I'm pretty sure what Miriel is trying to say is that Lunearc didn't seem to have slept much, if at all, last night, due to what had happened to him. Looking back on it now, I have to say I agree with that assessment." Stahl translated, somehow understanding the gist of Miriel's speech.
"What?! Not being able to sleep? That sounds terrible! Why would he decide to do such a thing?" Lissa exclaimed, in terror at the mere thought of missing a night of beauty-sleep, "And wait, did you say that something happened to him? What is this "distress" you speak of…?"
At this, all four in the group looked between themselves, suddenly realizing in unison that Lissa had been totally out of the loop up until now of what had happened.
And by all of their hesitation to speak, it seemed as though none of them wished to be the bearer of bad news to the princess.
Finally caving to the awkward silence, Vaike was the first to crack.
"So, uh. Last night, a group of us went out to this nice tavern to play some cards. Great place, great environment, and great fun, even if Teach tied for last place with Lunearc in cards! They still sold some fantastic ale, and I had more than my fill!" Vaike blabbered, still fondly recalling the details of the night, to which Lissa quickly grew tired of, "But, back to the point. Apparently, when Lunearc left the place alone, he was trailed by a nasty group on bandits on the way back. That's… about all we know, and we only know it thanks to the gatekeeper telling us about it. We weren't told much else, and as you've heard, Lunearc has had zero interest in talking about it."
"B-b-bandits!? In Ylisstol…?! Attacking Lunearc, when he was alone, no less?!" Lissa exclaimed, in total shock by each complicating factor, "No wonder he's acting strange! And not in the way strange that we all know and love! Is all of this true?"
"Yes, it's true. I've spoken with him about it myself. By what Lunearc said, he had surmised that it had been a planned assault by a group of four brigands to steal his sword." Chrom interjected, having walked into the Shepherds' garrison mid conversation, completely unannounced.
At this arrival, the group all turned to Chrom to hear him out.
"They hadn't been able to hurt Lunearc physically beyond the superficial, as he had been able to get away, thank the Gods. But when speaking to him, there couldn't be any doubt to the fact that he was rattled from the affair." Chrom commented on the state of Lunearc's health, as he frowned, "Quite frankly, I'm sick with disgust that brigandry has somehow made its way to our capital city, and that they would brazenly target someone in the Shepherds."
"Ah—Captain, you're here!" Sumia gushed, seemingly instantly forgetting the sordid mood, her focus entirely on an obvious single-focus.
"A planned attack…? So it's worse than we had been lead to believe." Stahl murmured, placing his hand on his chin in comtemplation.
"Wah-wah-what!?" Lissa yelped, both caught off guard by the sudden appearance and the stomach-churning revelation.
"What happened to Lunearc is also backed up by tons of witness testimony, who had all seen one brigand's appearance clear as day, with some of the witnesses also having claimed that they had seen other hooded figures with the prior bandit. All of those witnesses backed up the fact that a man markedly similar to our tactician had been chased by these brigands in the streets." Chrom explained, "In light of this, security around the city has been deployed, to keep an eye out for this group, and any further schemes they may have planned. Sully joined them as well, as she had been fuming at what happened."
"…" Lissa blinked disbelievingly, trying and failing to absorb all the information shot out at the speed of a cheetah on wheels. All she knew was that none of this was good!
"Umm… Captain. Will Lunearc be able to participate in the mission starting tomorrow?" Sumia inquired nervously.
"...I'm not sure. I asked the same to him directly, and while he denied needing to take off the mission, I could tell that he wasn't being entirely truthful. With how erratically he is acting now, he'd only be endangering himself and others." Chrom answered truthfully, pondering the possibility of trekking without the tactician, "Worst case scenario, we use the preliminary plan that Lunearc and myself came up with during our morning chat, sans his role, leaving him here in the castle. The general preparations already made should be enough to not have to delay our starting time tomorrow."
"Wait! Are you saying we'd have to leave him behind?" Lissa exclaimed, alert from what her brother was alluding to.
"Unfortunately, yes. If he's not ready by tomorrow morning, that's our best—and only, option." Chrom clarified bluntly, furrowing his brow, "Trust me, I'm not happy about it either. But we'll need to make do with whatever we can muster."
"But… that's…" Lissa complained, not able to come up with a proper rebuttal to the truth Chrom spoke.
Going silent, Lissa closed her eyes for a moment to think, and a memory flashed through her mind.
The image was still clear as day, every detail still etched permanently into her very soul.
It was the vision of Lunearc's desperate defense of Lissa against the brigand in Southtown, that had occurred under an hour within the two's first meeting.
Without his bravery, she'd not be alive. And without her healing, neither would he.
Despite his novice nature, he'd been the ball of fire to ignite the group, making a difference immediately upon his arrival, both metaphorically and literally, thanks to his absolutely whimsical sword of gemstones.
And now, they'd be going on an even more dangerous mission, without his presence…? Just at the thought, chills of what could come shivered down Lissa's spine, as the deep sense of dread consumed her.
Widening her eyes in distress as one would when waking from a horrible nightmare, Lissa made a proclamation, "We need to do something to help him! We can't just leave a Shepherd behind, right? Right! And if Lunearc still wants to go despite what's happened, we need to find a way to get him back to normal!"
"Well, saying that is one thing, but this task doesn't seem like it'd be as easy as downing a gallon of mead." Vaike stated, telling it as it is.
"While not an apt nor felicitous analogy, the brute induces a subject matter which requires elucidation." Miriel replied, actually agreeing with Vaike, for once.
"Huh, who are you callin' a brute?! Just because Teach wields an axe doesn't make him no better than a common brigand!" Vaike exclaimed, having understood very little of what Miriel had actually said other than that.
"Hmm… regardless, you'd probably need a plan in mind to get through to him. Nothing we've done has had any effect, Lissa." Sumia spoke to Lissa directly, tuning out the background noise of Vaike.
And therein lied the issue. What could possibly get Lunearc out of his rut?
Not having any specific idea in mind, Lissa turned to each person present, to see if any had any ideas of their own. Unfortunately, not a single one that they could provide was useful in the slightest.
Sighing in frustration, Lissa had almost lost hope, before she looked in the general vicinity of Stahl. No, he hadn't come up with an idea himself, but something next to him certainly piqued her interest…
"Hey Stahl, what's that dish behind you?" Lissa inquired about the frankly ginormous plate of food, gears in her head turning at an accelerating velocity.
"Oh, that? It's my dinner." Stahl answered, scratching his head to show that he was unaware of the point of Lissa's line of questioning, "They had some tasty cuts of meat prepared, so I just had to get a small serving for myself."
"...Small? That seems to be a… rather large size, in my opinion." Sumia questioned, staring with absolute terror at the plate of food Stahl considered to be a "small" serving, "I don't think a pegasus would be able to eat more than you..."
"Teach agrees with Sumia! Your "small" portion of food is big, even for someone with as many muscles as Teach! Teach is scared to learn what you consider to be "much" food!" Vaike flexed, as if trying to prove a point.
"One must wonder how you manage to possess your fit physique despite having the appetite of numerous men conjoined. Would you be willing to be a subject in my next experiment?" Miriel inquired, which Stahl simply waved his hands in a way which seemed to deny his interest in becoming Miriel's next guinea pig.
"Okay, yes I definitely agree that it's a ton of food, and far beyond what a normal human being can consume, but that's beside the point!" Lissa laughed, before narrowing the scope of her question, "I believe I've seen that kind of meat before. But could you please illuminate me to what it is? Just so I can be certain?"
"Why, sure, Lissa. It's mutton." Stahl added.
Upon the revelation that the cut of meat was of the mutton variety, Lissa instantly grinned deeply, and her eyes sparkled with a sharp, mischievous gleam. Of course, no one around had any idea what she was thinking, so they just watched on, confused.
"Are they still serving it in the dining hall? This is of great importance! What do you think, Chrom? Are they still serving mutton at this time?" Lissa aggressively asked, holding her hands in fists as she clung on to the baseline of the plan she had gotten attached to.
"Oh, uh, I think so? I doubt the kitchens would have closed by this time…" Chrom answered hesitantly, unsure of Lissa's current train of thought.
"Yes! Perfect! Then you all just sit tight, because I know just what to do!" Lissa exclaimed, energetically moving toward the exit of the garrison.
"What are you planning to do to Lunearc, Lissa?" Chrom shook his head, knowing that his sister's current facial expression could mean nothing but trouble.
"I'm planning to save our insomniac tactician... by pranking him to sleep! Just watch, it'll work!" Lissa confidentially exclaimed as she pattered out of sight, thrilled that her devious, prankish inclinations could be put to a good (?) cause.
….….….….….….
Mission: acquire mutton was a smashing success.
Had she been only a few minutes later, there might not have been any left! However, she had arrived the perfect time, and ransacked a portion surely large enough for Lunearc's tastes.
So now, with mutton in one hand and her "special surprise" in the other, Lissa moved towards the fated location of the ultimate showdown of wits: Lunearc's office.
She couldn't help but giggle to herself when she envisioned how he'd react to her multi-pronged attack!
If everything went right, she'd be able to view both the funny face and gain a victory for Lunearc's mental health! She'd be killing two birds with one stone! Icing two winged dragons with a single glacier! Healing a whole platoon with a single stave! And any other number of sayings that are the equivalent of completing two separate, unrelated tasks at once!
Knocking on the secluded tactician's door, Lissa exclaimed excitedly to announce her presence.
"Hey! Lissa here! All good to come in?"
…
Waiting a few moments for a response from the man inside, Lissa was disappointed but not necessarily shocked when no words of affirmation followed.
"All right then, you asked for it! I'm coming in, whether you like it not, mister!" Lissa chided, only half-joking, with the other half of her statement being out of veiled concern.
Grabbing the knob of the door and cautiously pushing, Lissa was alarmed when the door didn't budge. Was the door locked…?
Shelving that possibility for the moment, she instead rammed her shoulder against the door to apply more pressure, and sure enough, the door creaked open, with whatever having been holding it closed having been displaced.
With a slight yet manageable passageway now cleared, Lissa was able to sneak through the narrow opening she had crashed upon.
"Oh my Gods, what happened in here…?!" Lissa paused, with the first glance inside being completely out of the ordinary.
Now inside the room, Lissa had a perfect view to the current state of the room; that being a complete disaster.
Books lined the floors in a disorderly fashion, with the amount being far more numerous than the normal three to four from her prior visit. It seemed Lunearc had taken a trip to the library… or ten.
Glancing back at the door she had arrived in, she'd be amused if she wasn't so horrified. At the doorknob hung a shirt on its hanger, and at the bottom of the door Lunearc's entire set of old, decrepit armor lay.
So that was why she had such a difficult time opening the door!
At the left hand corner of the room, Lunearc's bed sat, lightly used, yet not made, with the pillows and blankets strewn about at seemingly random areas. It'd certainly be impossible to sleep in that… arrangement.
In the right hand corner, his new set of armor lay, placed atop an unholstered diamond sword, seemingly placed in that way to hide it from sight, except completely failing to accomplish that task.
And for the grand finale, the desk itself. Lunearc was currently present in the seat behind, looking far more disheveled than she had ever seen, even with such a large selection of past events to choose from.
At least in those cases, he had the excuse of being thrust into multiple desperate, bloody battles, as a fresh amnesiac without a memory to his name. Here, his look was less of a war-hardened soldier with the dirt and grime to prove it, instead displaying the countenance of one who was at wit's end, with stress levels that could make many others keel over.
Lunearc was currently staring at an open book on his desk, which would be normal if not for the fact that it was angled sideways, and piled atop other books which he seemingly had also taken a simultaneous interest in. With his right hand, he was firmly grasping that fang of his, holding it as if it were a lightweight dagger, at the ready in case a literary demon jumped out from the darkness.
"Erm… Lunearc…? Hello?" Lissa slowly waved, attempting to gain his attention, yet not receiving any reciprocation, "Are you in there?"
With a delay that lasted a few uncomfortably long seconds, Lunearc slowly lifted his head from the book he was "reading".
"Oh… Lissa? What's up...?" Lunearc replied, with all of the energy of a half-awake drunk, ready to slumber at a moment's notice, yet unable to receive a wink of sleep, made obvious by the dark circles under his eyes. Of note, the source of this behavior was not drunkenness, as this room lacked any liquid substance aside from water.
"I came to visit you. I recently heard that you had… a bit of a run in yesterday. Are you okay?" Lissa inquired, holding what she hoped to be a calming smile despite the strange situation.
"...I'm fine. Everything is fine." Lunearc replied, not holding eye contact for a moment of his response.
"Liar", Lissa thought to herself.
He was clearly only saying that to not make her worry. All physical evidence pointed to the absolute contrary.
"Okay then… then would you mind telling me what you are doing…?" Lissa asked, knowing she wasn't going to get anything out of doubling down on her current track.
"Reading. Did you know that Regna Ferox is known for some of the harshest winters on the continent? We're going to need to bundle up, even if Spring is currently upon us, as Regna Ferox is snowy in all but the warmest weeks of Summer."
Okay. So perhaps he had been able to absorb some useful information despite how off the wall he appeared. That was something to build on, at least.
"—The Regna Ferox government is also known for breeding bunnies with wyverns in secret laboratories to create a crossbreed mutant which has the luck and agility of a rabbit, and the power plus flying ability of the wyvern. It is said it was created specifically to exterminate the existential threat of the sheep army that invaded the nation in the Ovis uprising of 690, headed by the twisted mastermind Count Baaah."
Nevermind. He was totally off his rocker. Unless there was some giant conspiracy that sounded too bizarre to be true...
"Those last set of facts aren't true at all, Lunearc…" Lissa voiced, blank-eyed from the sheep, rabbit, and wyvern-centered scheme.
"Hmm.. maybe you're right. Wyverns don't exist. They're definitely just an imaginary creature. Thanks for pointing that out, I could have made a major mistake." Lunearc corrected himself, taking the absolute wrong lesson.
"What, no! Wyverns definitely exist, I was talking about the other things." Lissa replied, feeling as though getting through to him was almost hopeless, "But let's forget about all that, right? You most certainly do not look "okay"! It looks like you haven't gotten any sleep at all!"
"Oh, that's nonsense! I have had plenty of sleep, and tons of it recently..." Lunearc countered, words clearly not matching his body language.
"Oh, yeah? When was this "recently" you speak of?" Lissa inquired, leaning forward, questioning him like a mother would question a child who had lied about getting to bed on time.
"Hmmm… what would you say, Sal?" Lunearc cluelessly pondered, seemingly asking his question to the fang he held in his hands, which he had now bizarrely given a name, "...Oh, really…? So it was the night before last?"
"I knew it! You're in no form to exert yourself, okay?" Lissa instructed, as she walked close to Lunearc's desk, placed her hands over the books he was halfheartedly reading, and stared at him deeply into his drooping eyes, "Take some time off from studying and training, and get some rest. Cleric's orders."
"...I can't." Lunearc responded, after a pause that lasted for at least five seconds.
"...Hmm? What do you mean?"
"You don't think I've tried? Every time I've tried to stop and get some rest, I remember that the mission is tomorrow, and that I'm totally unprepared!" Lunearc responded, scrunching the bridge of his nose between his fingers, "And to add to all of that, some random bandits who I've never seen before attack me in the middle of the street, aiming for the only thing that I have of any value whatsoever! Without my sword, I'm useless..."
"I think you'll be plenty prepared, as long as you can get some rest tonight." Lissa reassuringly smiled, as she tapped her staff, "And besides, you've got all of the Shepherds with you as well! We're not exactly totally helpless, you know! So if any ruffian makes an enemy of you, they'll make a foe of all of us!"
"Heh. Thanks for those words, Lissa. But still, I'm unsettled about this whole thing." Lunearc said, as he attempted to return an awkward, and rather forced smile. It was clear that not much headway had really been made. But it was at least something to break the ice.
"Anyways, you hungry?" Lissa asked, not waiting for a response as she revealed the plate of food she had retrieved from the dining hall, "Cause I got your next meal right here! Looks tasty, right?!"
"Oh yeah, it does look good. I don't think I've eaten since... this morning?" Lunearc stated as he took a deep look at the plate Lissa had brought, once more forgetful of details that had occurred a mere few hours ago.
"Go on, dig in." Lissa persuaded, attempting to stifle an out of place mischievous giggle.
Cutting up the red meat into a small segment, Lunearc tasted a sample and began to chew. "Oh, not as tough as the bear. And very strong in flavor."
"Of course, nothing is as chewy as that!" Lissa added, starting to laugh ever more noticeably.
"It's very good, I quite like it." Lunearc stated, before finally noticing Lissa's strange, giddy behavior, "But is there something on my face? Is something funny?"
"Hehehe, maybe, or maybe not! I'm just very glad that you like it! Nothing else at all!" Lissa lied, so blatantly so that even Lunearc in his current state was able to catch on that something was up.
"...Seems like there's something more to it. Lissa, what exactly is this meal?" Lunearc slowly realized, widening his eyes in suspicion.
"Do you wanna know? Do you really wanna knoooow…?" Lissa teased, giggling loudly.
"As long as this meal doesn't make me a cannibal, yes, I think I'd rather know…" Lunearc insisted, hesitating as he stared at the now deeply suspicious food.
"It's mutton!" Lissa answered, bursting into a full blown laughter.
"Mutton?" Lunearc questioned, turning his head in confusion.
"Yup! Hilarious, right?" Lissa laughed, giggling some more.
"I can't quite say I understand the joke. What's mutton?" Lunearc asked, clueless to the punchline.
"It's sheep! Your archenemy! Woooooo….." Lissa echoed, making noises that sounded more akin to a stereotypical ghost.
"...Oh. That's it? That… really isn't that crazy, I guess." Lunearc blinked, not alarmed in the slightest at the revelation.
"Huh, wait what? What do you mean it isn't crazy, aren't you supposed to be deathly afraid of them taking over the world or something?!" Lissa recoiled, shocked at his reaction—or rather, the lack of one.
"Perhaps so, but there's a major distinction here. Sheep meat—or as you call it, mutton—implies that a member of that evil race has been slain to create food product, and thus that it is no longer alive. What exactly could a dead sheep possibly be able to do to harm me, or anyone else? It's not like they have souls, or a spirit of any kind. Thus, there is no active threat. In fact, there is one less threat than before. A net gain for humankind, and thus, the world."
"Boo… you're not being any fun." Lissa complained, unamused at her primary plan failing to elicit any hilarious responses—or faces.
Occasionally poking at his food, Lunearc's attention went straight back to his books, still messily organized and likely barely readable. He may have thought he was being productive, but it was anything but.
"Hey hey, how about we go outside for a bit? I'm sure you are feeling a bit cooped up, staying inside this dingy room all day, right? I know just the spot to go to clear your mind!" Lissa exclaimed, picking a few books off of the floor as if to point out how bad things had gotten.
"Can't. Need to prepare more." Lunearc bluntly answered, turning the page of a book, unknowingly skipping multiple in the process.
"Hmmph…" Lissa grumbled, scrunching her lips at how non-receptive the man opposite her was being, before her features grew mischievous, "Very well then, looks like we're going to be doing this the hard way!"
Hopping behind the tactician's desk—and thus, behind the tactician himself, Lissa did something she knew would be able to get an actual reaction, regardless of Lunearc's current mindset.
With her right hand, Lissa grabbed and pulled at the drawer's handle that had been the container for his "journal", which caused Lunearc to abruptly adjust his focus.
"I told you before, there's nothing interesting in there! Besides, if you are looking for my notebook, it's gone anyway. I've looked all over for it, to no avail." Lunearc commented, leaning forward with his body to keep the drawer shut tight.
This action had the unintended consequence of putting the back of his neck and shirt's nape within reach of Lissa's left arm, which was where her true plan could be put into action and truly shine!
It was time for her secret weapon to be unleashed: a frog! Already having taken it out from the bag, Lissa plopped the hoppy, squirmy, and wet creature under Lunearc's shirt through the opening in the collar, where it quickly became embedded.
"Wha—?! Cold and slimy! Oh God, what the heck is that…?! And why is it moving?!" Lunearc jolted straight upward in his chair, contorting his back as he felt the frog swim around, under his shirt. As he did this, his face took on a form that could simply be summarized as: hilarious.
"Heeee hee hee hee hee… hahahaha!" Lissa laughed impishly, the culmination of all her plotting finally paying dividends.
"Lissa! What did you put in my shirt…?!" Lunearc exclaimed, grasping at his backside, trying to stop the slimy frog from advancing any further down his body, but utterly and completely failing.
"It's a… it's a… tee hee hee!" Lissa tried to explain, but could only laugh, at an intensity that nearly caused her to snort in glee, "A frog!"
"A frog?!" Lunearc repeated as he continued to move his arms in a panicked fashion, sensing that the frog was now at the bottom of his shirt, and quite possibly almost about to hop even lower. He did not want that to happen today.
"How do you like your new friend? I think he likes you!" Lissa giggled with a comment from the peanut gallery, now almost rolling on the floor with elation.
"I think he should give me some personal space!" Lunearc retorted, finally navigating his hands under the shirt where the frog was located, only for the frog to once more slip free of his grip, hopping its cold and slimy body back up Lunearc's spine, "Ech! Not again!"
"Ribbit!" the frog croaked, just doing what a frog does naturally.
Still watching the scene unfold before her, Lissa continued to laugh heartily, and even snorted a few times—though Lunearc didn't seem to notice, being busy with the rogue amphibian and all.
"Seeing as how you're stuck in there and refuse to leave, it seems I've got no other option!" Lunearc called at the frog, before moving to take his shirt off.
Now shirtless, Lunearc held his shirt in his arms, where the frog continued to be. Shaking the shirt with a few firm movements, the creature was finally released from its imprisonment, as it plopped to the floor.
"Phew, finally. I thought that was going to stick to me forever…" Lunearc sighed a breath of relief, drying his back before moving his shirt back on.
"I wish it had! That was the funniest thing I've seen all day!" Lissa finally concluded her laughter, having gotten her fill of it.
"You couldn't bring me to the pond for a prank, so you instead brought the pond to me… I should have known that pond incident wouldn't be a one time thing." Lunearc groaned, recalling the last water-filled excursion.
"You know it! That situation was far too hilarious to only see once! I did a pretty good job this time around, am I right!" Lissa exclaimed, patting herself on the back, "Besides, it finally got your attention away from those books, so I'd say it was a success!"
"Haaaaah… I have to admit, you got me." Lunearc sighed, shaking his shoulders as he realized that Lissa had indeed concocted a tightly knit, sneakily intelligent plan, "What exactly is it that you want? Or did you just go through all this effort to prank me?"
"Going to any extent for a prank is always worth it!" Lissa proclaimed, stout in her beliefs, "But, today, that was just a bonus! I came here to help you get some rest! In the form you're in now, you won't be able to go on the mission, let alone do well in it!"
"What do you mean, I won't be able to go on the mission?" Lunearc paused, surprised by what Lissa had brought up.
"...Look at yourself! Heck, take a look around the room! This is not the room of someone who is well enough to go out. Because of your current state, there have even been conversations about keeping you off the mission for your own well-being!" Lissa chided, waving her arms at some of the particularly messy areas of the room.
"...Oh." Lunearc replied, processing the unexpected possibility of him being kept off the mission.
"But don't you worry, because that's why I'm here!" Lissa announced, stating her intention of helping.
"Making my back get covered in frog slime was supposed to help things how…?" Lunearc questioned, skeptical.
"Because now that I've gotten your full attention, you're going to come with me!" Lissa exclaimed, "We're going somewhere very nice, and you cannot refuse!"
"And why is that?" Lunearc confusedly stared, tipping his head at the energetic girl.
"Because if you don't, I'll find a way to stuff this frog down your shirt again." Lissa stated as she picked the frog off the ground, and displayed it triumphantly.
"Okay, fine. Point taken." Lunearc relented, finally listening to reason, "...I suppose I can take a short break from researching."
"Yes, yes, that's the spirit! Now come on, we've got to get there by sunset!"
….….….….….….
After getting lead outside of his office under duress of continued pranks by Lissa, Lunearc was brought to an area on the outskirts of the castle of which he had passed by briefly in the past, but had never taken a closer look at.
In his line of sight, he could see a well-kept garden courtyard of ample size, with every corner sporting a unique arrangement of flower throughout.
With the setting sun above illuminating each petal in a way no painting could ever replicate, the sight alone was almost enough to knock the weakened Lunearc off his feet. Sensing his awe, Lissa dashed further into the garden.
"What do you think? Beautiful, right?!" Lissa spun around ahead of Lunearc, smiling brightly, light reaching her features in a much similar fashion under the shimmering horizon.
"...Yeah. Beautiful." Lunearc mouthed after a rather long pause, as his eyes seemed to linger more on Lissa than the garden behind her, before he abruptly blushed and averted his gaze to the flowers as if to correct himself, "Erm… really scenic. It's a fantastic garden."
"I knew you'd like it! There's absolutely nothing better than a spring garden at sunset." Lissa exclaimed proudly, completely missing any possible double meanings that had accidentally slipped from the one opposite her, "Let's walk around for a bit, there are so many different flowers here!"
As the two walked the grass covered path, Lissa's claim was proved to be veritably true. Roses, lilacs, pink diascia, bluebells, peonies, tulips, and many more varieties filled the garden with color, as the occasional bee flew about, doing their task of pollination much in a similar fashion as a farmer would tend to their crops.
"Ok, this looks like a good place to sit down." Lissa decided, plopping herself lazily down upon a grass covered clearing, letting her legs extend forward. Following her example, Lunearc sat directly to her right side.
Directly ahead, there was a small grove of flowers, with yellow sunflowers easily being the largest in density among them. The slight, cool breeze caused them to drift in the wind, never staying still.
"The sunflower is my favorite flower. Have I told you that before?" Lissa stated, staring at the group of sunflowers ahead.
"I don't believe you have. Is there a reason you connect with it so?" Lunearc inquired.
"Oh, there are tons of reasons! First of all, they're super pretty, super bright, and just make me feel happy! And before they're fully grown, they always face the sun! I think the scientists call it something like helio… helio… ah right, heliotropism! Basically, they are the eternal optimist of flowers, so how couldn't I love them?" Lissa explained, interspersing her reasoning with little tidbits of plant trivia.
"I can see why you like them so much." Lunearc noted, simply taking in the great scenery with the ever-energetic girl.
"Or perhaps I'm just predestined to like them so much because of my name!" Lissa giggled, causing Lunearc to turn his head in a questioning posture.
"Really? What does your name have to do with it?" Lunearc asked, curious.
"That's because my name just so happens to mean "Honey-bee"!" Lissa revealed.
"Hah!" Lunearc laughed to himself as he thought up a fitting pun, "So you aren't even sure how much of your preference is...ahem... nature versus nurture?
"Heheh, who knows! Buuuut… now that I think about it… the sunflower also just so happened to lead me to you." Lissa admitted, thinking back to the two's first meeting, "So even if they hadn't been my favorite before, they definitely would be now."
"Hm…?" Lunearc tipped his head in an increasingly sharp angle, completely missing the context, "How would sunflowers help you locate an unconscious amnesiac?"
"Well, when we found you in the field, we only noticed you because you were right next to a whole bunch of sunflowers!" Lissa revealed, moving her hands out wide as if to mimic the scale of flowers he'd been next to.
"Oh, really...?" Lunearc thought back to the time he had been found, trying to recall, as he took a sniff of his surroundings, "...Now that you mention it, I do remember smelling this rather familiar aroma of flower when I awoke… it must have been sunflower. Hmm… it seems I owe a lot to the humble sunflower, huh? Without you and Chrom recruiting me into the Shepherds, I'd probably still be wandering around, clueless and without a purpose. And that's in the best case scenario."
"Haha, yep! Brigands would've been a rude awakening! Instead, it was me, all along! I take full credit for finding you!" Lissa giggled some more, smiling brightly.
"And that is something I'll never forget, for as long as I live. I promise." Lunearc expressed gratitude, matching the smile of the girl at his side.
At that declaration, the two sat in relative silence, merely watching the flower field as the sun began to head below the horizon, creating a mesmerizing blend of bright yellow, orange, and red. Sure enough, the sunflowers pointed toward the sun.
Lissa had taken to humming a little tune to herself, but Lunearc hadn't made much noise for quite some time. Perhaps he was just tired after a long, sleepless day.
At least, that was what Lissa was thinking until something rather surprising happened. All of a sudden, Lunearc had leaned his shoulder into her, causing there to be very little space between the two.
"Huh?" Lissa blushed, caught completely off guard by this turn of events. She wasn't exactly sure how to feel about this, but she was simply too curious to move away.
Turning her face towards Lunearc, Lissa resolved to see this through to the end.
When looking upon him, he was very near, had his eyes closed, and was breathing deeply.
Wait a second… was he sleeping? He was, he totally was! He had fallen asleep mid-flower-gazing!
"Urk…! Heavy!" Lissa spoke, as Lunearc drowsily leaned more of his shoulder upon her.
He was simply too heavy! At this rate, she'd be toppled! Lissa had to do something, quick!
Unsure of what else to do, Lissa scooted back a foot, catching Lunearc as the weight supporting his top now tumbled downward.
Placing his head upon her legs, Lunearc now rested peacefully, face-up, without the need to crush her.
In fact, he was resting so peacefully, that he was almost… vulnerable?
Giggling mischievously to herself, Lissa's hand began to hover around his nose. In the past, she had held Chrom's nose as he slept, and it ended up being a hilarious prank!
So now, doing it to Lunearc would be just as funny, right?
As soon as her hand touched the defenseless Lunearc's nose, Lissa hesitated. While it would be funny to see his reaction, wasn't the whole purpose of her plans to get him to sleep?
Well, here he was, asleep. It'd be rather cruel to wake him up now, after all that he had been through in the last day.
Lightly smiling to no one in particular, Lissa resolved to save this prank for another time.
Drifting the hand away from the almost-was beleaguered nose, she instead began to pat Lunearc's light brown, brunette hair, content to just sit peacefully like this for some time.
And so she did. Time flowed, and with it, the sun's passing into night. By now, only the faintest of natural light remained, with the garden courtyard receiving only echoes of candlelight from the surrounding areas.
The only thing that broke this silence was to be a rather firm stomping of feet, signaling an arrival.
"What have I just walked into? What's going on here?" Chrom questioned, perplexed by the unconscious Lunearc on Lissa's lap, "Lissa, what did you do to him? Did you finally kill a man with those pranks of yours?"
"I did just as I said I would, Chrom!" Lissa beamed, denying the accusation of murder, "I got him to sleep soundly! As you can see, he's doing just fine. In fact, the pranks were the secret sauce to his sleep! I planned this all out!"
"—Besides the fact that if it were not for your legs, he'd be sleeping on the ground once more, just the same as how we met him the first time. Were you planning on sitting here all night as he slept? He doesn't seem to be waking anytime soon." Chrom observed, laughing heartily at the current situation.
"...So maybe I didn't think my plan ALL the way through. But it still did the job! Lunearc will definitely be able to come with us tomorrow on the mission, right?" Lissa inquired, pleading for Lunearc's presence in the upcoming event.
"We'll see how he is tomorrow, but yes, with sleep, he should hopefully be mentally and psychically able. Honestly, it's a relief. I wasn't looking forward to doing this without him." "Though, we should probably give him a proper bed for the night. The ground is not a good place for a nap, as I always say..."
"Then, I think I have an idea!" Lissa exclaimed, "Do you think we can carry him up his his office? You strong enough, Chrom?"
"Is that a challenge? Of course I am!" Chrom stepped up, ready to take on any challenge.
"Well then, up you go!" Chrom grunted as he picked up Lunearc, moving to carry the tactician on his shoulders, "Gods! What is he made up of, rocks?! Quite… heavy…"
"Sounds like someone is having a difficult time!" Lissa teased, pleased that she now had a new conscious person to do so to.
"Are you kidding? This is tough… but I can handle this!" Chrom muttered between gritted teeth, taking the first choppy steps with Lunearc on his back, as he struggled to hold his own balance.
Ten minutes in the future, the palace guards would nearly have a heart attack in shock.
But upon explanation by the princess that no, the palace was not under siege by enemies who were taking victims, the guards would instead offer to carry the sleeping tactician in the prince's stead.
Far too stubborn in his ways, the prince would grit his teeth and deny the assistance, opting to prove to his sister that he indeed had the strength to complete this simple, yet surprisingly hardy task.
With an unexpected workout completed by the prince, the wayward tactician had been safely and securely returned to his room.
As Chrom opened the door however, he had a look of dreadful worry as he surveyed the messy state the room had been left in.
"I suppose I should clear a path, huh?" Lissa commented, nearly having forgotten herself how bad the room had looked.
"Yes, please do that…" Chrom slowly answered, as he thought back to how he remembered the room being, "This room didn't nearly look so bad when I visited him this morning, but now that I think about it, the warning signs of a sty had been forming…"
Picking books off the floor and placing them on nearby tables, Lissa made room for Chrom to carry the sleeping Lunearc to his bed. Mission completed, Chrom yawned as he wiped sweat from his brow, leaving the room without looking back.
Lissa still wanted to do a couple of things before she did the same.
Placing a blanket over the dazed dreamer, Lissa then turned to the desk, taking a small book out of her bag, and snuck it inside the drawer.
"Good night!" Lissa hummed to the unconscious Lunearc, closing the door behind her as she exited to make time for her own rest, on the dusk of the final night before the fateful adventure to a new land.
….….….….….….
Holding his artisan quality map in his left hand like his life depended on its continued existence, Dorkus surveyed the terrain ahead as he held a light source with his other hand to illuminate the way through the darkness.
"How much damn longer will it take us to get to Regna Ferox?" Dall complained, ever the impatient bastard.
"If we travel directly North and stay on the path without any distractions, it's gonna take about ten hours at our current pace. Taking into account sleep, at best we'll arrive at the wall late midday tomorrow." Dorkus responded, measuring the distance between source and destination between his fingers on the map.
"Fuh! I joined the bandits to wreak havoc, not to walk the paths like some loathsome peasant without transportation!" Dall announced, getting agreeing bellows from his entourage of like-minded brain-dead lackeys.
"Like we're any better than normal peasants..." Dorkus thought to himself, shaking his head in disappointment.
"You two, card game addicts! You still playing those games of yours, even in this time and darkness?! How do you even see the cards?" Dall yelled, trying to get the attention of the two card-players, who were doing just that, even in the pitch darkness.
"It's all about the feel of the cards, that's the secret." the first responded revealing a card to the other.
"Yeah, we specifically designed our deck to have slight grooves at the value, so we could be blind and still able to play without problem." the second expounded, playing around with the rest of the deck.
"You know what, actually? I take back my question. I don't give a shit." Dall snidely remarked, rolling his eyes.
"Hmm…" Dorkus hummed, thinking of something rather important.
"What is it now, dork?" Dall turned, hearing Dorkus.
"...We're going to need to find a way to get into Regna Ferox." Dorkus pondered, recalling information he'd heard in the past.
"Really? That's what got your mind going?" Dall questioned, as he looked at Dorkus as though he was a fool, "The answers' simple, we just walk in, idiot."
"It won't be that easy. The entirety of the border has a steep wall, with guards keeping watch over it." Dorkus countered, giving an overview of the Feroxian border security, "There are only a select few gates throughout, and they are also nearly impossible to pass without conflict."
"Hmph, that's news to me." Dall groaned, seemingly stumped for a moment, before coming up with a harebrained scheme, "Ah, I know what we'll do! Since that princey boy is coming up anyways, they'll be expecting him. So, we just gotta dress up as him and his crew, and those Feroxi will have no choice but to let us in!"
"That isn't going to work… They'll see right through it and attack." Dorkus stated, trying to dispel the plan where it stood.
"Stop being such a coward, it's a brilliant plan! You're just simply going against it because your feeble mind didn't come up with it yourself!" Dall shot back, encouraging his entourage to take his side, which they quickly did, with a series of jeers.
"I don't like this…" Dorkus shook his head, not able to convince the others.
"Stop bitching and scrounge up some good items for our disguises! That goes for all of you!" Dall voiced, gesturing at the other six brigands.
….….….….….….
(6/27/23) I was not expecting this chapter to be this long. But, somehow, it was among the longest so far.
I think it came out well, so it was well worth the efforts.
With this chapter over, we can now return to the main Awakening storyline, as the Shepherds begin their journey to Regna Ferox.
Anyways, this last weekend, I went white water rafting with some buddies. Had never done that before, it was a good time! Highly recommend!
There's nothing crazier than rowing down a river and seeing that there is nothing but air beneath you! (because the raft went flying against a giant wave...?!)
I didn't fall out of the raft (At least, not unless it was purposeful), which is surprising.
However, I am now covered head to toe in sunburns and bug bites!
As for Zelda TOTK, I'm still making slow progress. 76 shrines beaten, but still have only tackled ONE of the main story dungeons.
That's all for now, thanks for reading!