A/N - I can't lie, I almost abandoned this - but I have really strong emotional ties to this story and can't let it go that easily. I do apologize for my extended hiatus. I've changed jobs, gotten married and my daughter started and graduated kindergarten in the time I've been gone - lots of life changes. I hope you all are well and I truly appreciate each and every one of you. Also, remember - this is a slow burn because I want to really show Hermione's journey to reconnect with herself. There will likely be a small romantic detour before we get to the good relationship development.

Chapter 10 - Pick a Side

Risking another glance at Severus, she stood up and took her coffee cup to the counter by the kitchen sink. After giving Pansy and Draco a hug along with a curt nod towards Severus she apparated back to her apartment in Solvang. Immediately feeling lonely and regretting not asking if Draco or Severus needed any help around the lab.

Hermione walked over to her couch, took a seat and placed her head in her hands. Thinking about what Pansy had said the day before, how the Weasley's are still looking for her - she felt the panic start rising in her chest. She may have put on a brave face yesterday, but there was only so much healing that you could do in a month and a half. If she was being honest, she really had no idea what she'd do if Ron came for her.

Draco was probably right that she should learn how to defend herself without a wand, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to start taking lessons just yet. The idea of behind around a group of people who are fighting, real or not, made her apprehensive. Maybe she could look into private lessons… she shook her head, that was a subject to ponder for another day.

She wished more than anything that she could reach out to Harry and Ginny to let them know the true story, but she worried they wouldn't believe her. Ron was one man, yet she was terrified of him. She couldn't figure that out for the life of her, she'd fought it a war for Merlin's sake against much scarier and more dangerous people that Ronald Weasley.

She reminded herself that California was never meant to be a permanent solution, her goal was to heal and rebuild herself before getting back to the magic world. It was just a matter of how long was it going to take her? She felt frustrated with the fact that she'd even broken down to this point, angry at herself still. It's not your fault. She reminded herself of the words Dr. Hales told her, it is not my fault. While it may not be her fault, it's her job now to undo the mess that was done and become herself once more.

Taking a deep breath and rubbing her face, trying to get the negative thoughts out of her head, she shot a look at the clock and saw that it was only 9am, a whole day ahead of her with nothing really planned and no one to keep her company. It was hard to be alone, especially when she had nothing to keep her occupied. I wonder if Pansy would protest if I got a part time job, she thought to herself. A job might be a good way to interact with more people on a daily basis and at least get out of the house. It'd been over 2 years since she had a job, and she really did miss having a reason to wake up every morning. While her parents money would keep her comfortable for a few years, it was not a permanent solution by any means and at some point she would need to make an income.

After taking a few more minutes to think about it, she decided it'd be best to take a bath first to release some of the tension she felt building up in her muscles. She seemed to always be able to find a sense of peace in the tub, with the warm water surrounding her and the smell of eucalyptus from her bathsoap. As she stepped into the bath and laid down, allowing the water to reach right beneath her chin, she let out a sigh of relief and closed her eyes - allowing herself to relax.

—

England - 1 Month, 2 Week & 4 Days after Hermione's Disappearance

Pansy desperately wanted to have another run in with a Weasley or Potter (if she was lucky), one where she was more prepared and not caught off guard. She new Ron would sometimes venture out, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to run into him or not. Thinking more, she realized that Blaise worked in the Ministry and she might have a chance of running into Harry there. Deciding that was her best bet at that moment, she made her way to the Ministry, not bothering to warn Blaise of her arrival.

As she made her way through the hustle and bustle, she kept an eye out for anyone that she might benefit from talking to. She wasn't exacty sure on what she was going to say or how she would open up the conversation, but she at least had an 'in' so to speak, with Hermione being missing/presumed dead. She needed to know more about what Ron was planning in all of this, if he was looking for her or if he'd just give up. Though, she didn't know the proper course of action for either scenario - at least if she knew something for sure then they could start planning.

If only we could just kill him, she thought to herself - knowing that while it wasn't a viable option (unless one of them wished to spend the rest of their life in Askaban), it was a very tempting one. She felt like if her, Hermione, Draco and Severus all put their minds together that they could likely come up with some untraceable method, but was it worth the risk? Honestly, yes - but she decided to leave that as a last resort.

Still walking towards Blaise's office, out of the corner of her eye she saw a flash of red hair. Turning to look she saw George Weasley. She never really spoke to him much, even before Hermione cut off contact with everyone, but she decided he was better than no one at all. Making her way to his direction she noticed he was talking with Harry, she almost squealed in excitement seeing the person she went there to speak to.

"Harry, George? Sorry, to interrupt, I was on my way to pay Blaise a visit and saw the two of you over here and thought I would check to see how the lot of you are doing with everything." She put on her best look of concern, taking note of each of their facial expressions being sure to rule out anything to be suspicious of.

"Pansy, hello," Harry spoke first, offering her a small smile. "Ginny mentioned she ran into you a few days back."

"Yes, I felt so bad that I didn't have time to really speak with her, I was in quite the rush to a meeting and was already late. I've honestly been keeping myself as busy as possible so that I don't have time to really sit and thing about Hermione… I just keep thinking about how I never told her I forgave her for cutting me out of her life." She looked down, doing her best to elicit sympathy.

"I can understand that, it's been hard on us too." Harry placed his hand on her shoulder, offering what comfort he felt he could, "Ginny's been doing similarly, doing her best to keep busy with the kids so that she doesn't have to sit down and really think about it and I'm pretty sure that Ron is losing his mind. He still thinks she's alive and he's been obsessively looking for her."

"Oh? What do you think?" She pried subtly.

"I'm honestly not sure, if she's not dead then why wouldn't she let us know? I can't think of a good reason for her to just disappear like that without any notice. Even if she had been distant the last few years, she was still family."

"What about you George?" Pansy asked, turning her attention to the silent man who hadn't spoken up yet - causing him to shift uncomfortably.

"I have a theory, but I don't really feel comfortable talking about it here." He stated, motioning towards the multiple people surrounding them. This piqued Pansy's interest, why would George be hesitant to speak about his theory on Hermione?

"We could go back to mine if it's something of importance?" Harry suggested, looking confused and intrigued.

George didn't respond right away, he seemed to be weighing the pros and cons of going down a possible rabbit hole that would most assuredly spur from what he was going to share with Pansy and Harry. For a long time he'd suspected that Hermione was enduring some type of abuse, he was genuinely surprised no one else had caught on. Her behavior shifted so dramatically two years ago that he really had a hard time understanding how it didn't cause concern to anyone. Though, he never said anything so he was just as guilty for not doing anything about it in his opinion.

"I don't think Grimmauld Place is the best for what I'm going to share," he stated, "Pansy, if you don't mind - could we go to yours?" His facial expression and tone remained neutral as he made the request even though he felt uneasy about all of this. This was really the last thing he expected to talk about today.

"Yes, of course - that's no problem. Give me 5 minutes so that I can adjust my wards for you to apparate through." Pansy's mind was racing, whatever George had to say must have some weight to it if he was avoiding going to Harry's place. What kind of worms might be in the can that's about to be opened, she wondered.

She quickly apparated back to her place and adjusted the wards to allow George and Harry though, which only took about a minute. The next 4 minutes moved as slow as molasses, she found herself pacing in front of her fireplace waiting for the two to come through so that her curiosity could be satisfied.

"Hello again," she greeted them both as they entered her living room, "please take a seat, would you like a cuppa?"

They both declined and took a seat on the couch opposite of Pansy, each of them looking uncomfortable as this was not a regular occurrence in the slightest. She could count on her hand how many times they'd both been to her place, all before Ron's accident and Hermione shutting them all out.

"So what do you have to say that's so secretive we couldn't go to Grimmauld Place, The Burrow, or your place?" Harry asked in a somewhat accusing manner, though there were no really accusations to make.

"I didn't want to risk Ron overhearing or upsetting my mother. I'm hesitant to say anything at all considering the fact I feel an immense amount of guilt for not speaking up sooner." George stated, seriously looking at Harry. George was never quite the same after Fred died, he became much less of a jokester and kept to himself most of the time. He watched though, always observing but rarely participating. He honestly preferred it that way, there was a certain solace to it.

"What are you talking about?" Harry seemed annoyed, he'd been under an immense amount of stress already with Hermione disappearing and Ginny finding out she's pregnant again - he really wasn't sure how much more he was going to be able to handle.

"Didn't you notice how after Ron's accident, Hermione started to seclude herself? Become more quiet when they came to dinner at the burrow?"

Harry sat and thought for a moment before nodding his head.

"Ron's behavior shifted too, he was more tense and was always watching Hermione. Before the accident he would only look at her if he were talking to her or wanted to snag a glance of appreciation, but the way he started looking at her the last two years was intense, like if she moved the wrong way he would get upset." He took a moment to let Harry's wheels turn before continuing, "I'm pretty sure that Ron was abusing Hermione."

Pansy held her breath, trying not to let on that she already knew the information George was sharing. She looked at Harry, waiting for him to reply but his face just looked shocked. She decided to risk a little bit and replied, "I honestly suspected the same… I'd seen my mom go through a similar shift. I didn't recognize it right away, after I received the letter from her cutting off contact I was really angry… but the more I thought about it the more I realized that Hermione would never send a letter to cut contact, she'd be direct about it. I didn't know what to do though so I kept quiet." She put on her best heart broken look, making sure she played the part she needed to play. "Do you… do you think Ron might have done something to her?"

"There's no way, Ron loves her. There's no way he'd hurt her." Harry spoke up, still looking shocked, trying to process the information he just received.

"All the signs were there, mate. How else would you explain her behaviour change?" George replied, then turned his attention to Pansy. "Honestly I'm not sure. I think either he did something to her or she finally found a way out."

"Why wouldn't she have said anything to us? We would have helped her." Harry didn't want to believe it, but he couldn't deny that she changed. He'd been so wrapped up with his own family that he didn't fully register how drastic the change had been.

"Her whole family was Ron's family, she probably felt that no one would believe her." Pansy stated.

"What are we supposed to do with this information?" Harry asked, trying to figure out how to find the truth in all of this.

"I'm not sure, if Hermione is alive we need to find her… preferably before Ron does. I know he's still looking for her, that's either the truth or a ruse to cover up for the fact he knows exactly what happened to her." George said solemnly.

"I can follow up with a few contacts to see if they might know how to find her if she escaped? I know some pretty good investigators that I contacted when she first disappeared but they didn't come up with anything." She wasn't sure how far to take the lie, but she needed to make sure that they believed she didn't know anything until she decided it was time for them to know (if that time did come).

"I'll check with some people in my department as well, should I talk to Ron? Try to get some information?" Harry asked, it was obvious that George's insight on the situation hadn't sunk in yet and he'd reverted to near autopilot.

"I'm worried that might make him suspicious, maybe just leave it be for now until we can figure out more. Maybe we could tell some of the others? Not Molly, though." Pansy had stood up at this point, she was back to pacing in front of the fireplace - but she wasn't really thinking about this specific situation. She was wondering if she should tell Hermione or not, maybe she'd talk to Draco first and go from there. Either way, she was a bit giddy - if more people were aware of what Ron did to Hermione then maybe she wouldn't have to be so closed off from the world. Maybe she could get some relief from the constant fear, knowing that no one would let Ron anywhere near her.

"I'll tell Gin, but I think we should leave it at that for now. I don't want to cause a big stir if it turns out this is just a big mistake. Especially with how painful the disappearance has been already, I would really rather not make it worse if we don't have to." Harry said, running his hand through his hair.

"Okay, well I best get on with it, I'll owl you if I get any information." She stated, hoping they'd leave soon so she could contact Draco.

"Likewise," they both said in unison. George gave Pansy a curt nod before taking his leave, Harry followed behind shortly after.

She let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding, took out her phone and sent a message to Draco.

Need to talk ASAP - Pansy

—

A/N: Okay, I'm going to start the next chapter as soon as I update this. I really want to be able to allow Hermione to let her shoulder's down and I think having more people on her side is going to help her with that. Not to say there won't be some more drama down the road, I have a plan :) Anyways, please review and let me know what you think! I promise not to make you wait another 2 years for the next update. Love you all!