The woman guides me silently through the street, checking occasionally to see if I'm still following behind her. A million thoughts are racing through my mind;
Is this really a good idea?
What if she's some crazy capitolite?
Could she find out who I am?
Does she already know?
But the most prominent thought in my mind is of Cassius and Cliff. I'm a horrible person, hurting two of the most important people to me, let alone my family.
The woman halts my thoughts when she stops in front of a small building, hidden slightly my shops on both sides, selling garments of every colour imaginable.
"After you." She says, gesturing to the widen and glass door. I hesitantly walk through the door, taken aback by the lights shining off of the many metallic surfaces. Essentially it's exactly what I figured a Capitol Cafe would be like. I hear the woman enter in behind me as the door shuts behind her. She walks over to a table and sits down, gesturing for me to follow.
When I sit across from her she comments on my behaviour.
"You act like you've never been in a cafe before." She says with a laugh.
I stop observing my surroundings and look at her.
"I haven't." I say flatly. She gives me a look and smirks.
"You're an odd one, you know." She says picking up a sheet of plastic coated paper from the table. She scans it with her her eyes before she looks back up at me.
"What's your name?" she asks me.
"Anastasia." I tell her. "And you?"
I notice the woman furrow her brows slightly before she replies.
"Mara." She says, putting down the menu.
"What's your boyfriends name?" She asks me, leaning forward slightly.
"Cal." I say shortly. In the short time I've know Mara, I've begun to get an uncomfortable feeling from her, as if she's studying me harshly.
"I knew a Cal once, not a bad guy. Pretty funny." She says, leaning back once more. She looks around the room casually before standing from her chair.
"I'm going to get a drink, you want anything?" She asks me. I shake my head.
"I'm good, thanks." Mara shrugs and walks off to a counter, behind which there's a tall, skinny woman with bright pink hair and more piercings than I think I can count. I take a moment to survey the cafe, paying specific attention to the exits- just in case.
I can't help but notice that I'm not the only one who looks 'normal' in the building. Only a couple of people have brightly coloured hair or other artificial modifications. I try and think back at the coverage of the Capitol I'd seen in the past, nearly everyone looked like they'd fallen in a pot of neon paint, whereas here, most people could fit into the districts, provided you cover them in dirt first.
After a short amount of time, Mara comes back to the table, holding two black mugs in her hands. She hands one to me and I hesitantly take it.
"I said I didn't need anything." I tell her. She nods.
"And I think you do." She says with a smile. I give off a weak smile and take the mug in both hands, absorbing the warmth of the liquid. I look at the contents and see the liquid is a foamy brown, which I quickly recognize.
"How'd you know I like hot chocolate?" I ask Mara, causing her to laugh.
"It's a pretty common thing to like." She says, sitting down in the chair opposite me.
"Not where I'm from. No one can afford it." I tell her, instantly regretting my words.
Mara narrows her brows at me.
"Where are you from?" She asks. I quickly remember my backstory from Dew and recite it as best as I can.
"District Two." I begin. "I'm a transfer from the districts for peacekeeping. I was one of the best in my squad so they sent me here for more training." I tell her. Her face tells me she believes my story, allowing me to relax slightly.
"Well that explains a lot." Mara says, taking a sip of her beverage.
"How long have you been here?" She asks me, putting down her mug, and looking me in the eye.
"A few weeks." I lie. She smirks.
"What'd you think of the games?" She asks, "Pretty crazy this year huh?"
I feel my heart rate pick up rapidly as my throat goes dry. Mara picks up on my discomfort and speaks again.
"District kid, sorry. Yours got eliminated pretty quick though." She says, leaning back in her chair once more.
I take a moment to recompose before I speak.
"Oh yeah, Knox and Bronte." I say quietly, thinking back to that first day in the arena when I killed Knox single handedly. I'm disgusted by that little bit of pride I get from that accomplishment. Not in the mood to speak anymore, I pick up my mug and take a few large sips to prevent any conversation.
Mara keeps the silence for a moment before she picks up the conversation once more.
"What's it like?" Mara asks. I look up at her slightly, before returning my focus to the beverage in front of me.
"What do you mean?"
"Watching people you know in the games? It's tough to watch your favourite die here in the Capitol, but what's it like to actually know them?" Her question causes memories I'd rather not remember to resurface in my mind.
My knife lodging itself into the throat of the boy from ten. My first kill
Chasing down the girl from Five at the Cornucopia, looking at my hands covered in her blood.
My long, tiring fight with Knox. That would be the moment the crowd knew who I really was, a killer who would never show remorse.
My next was the girl from Six. Her face is strong in my mind as I remember chasing her through the woods, smiling as I stab her in the back, quite literally.
Kai drowning in the freezing river, blood pouring from his head as I scream his name into the water.
Rye killing the boy from eight as he nearly killed me.
I killed the boy from Six, after sparing his life the night before, regretting my mercy.
I watch a replay of Cassius killing Athena as she kills him in my mind. I can almost feel Cassius in my arms again as he dies, his body weighing twice as much when dead.
The small girl who was hiding in the Cornucopia near the end, Mortea, was one of my last. She ended with a neck bent at a sickening ninety degrees.
And then there's me.
"Anastasia?" Mara asks, snapping me briskly from my thoughts.
"Huh?" I shake my head slightly to refocus my attention. Mara is now standing by the table.
"I've got to go, but thanks for this. I think I needed it more than you did." She says with a small smile. I nod and Mara makes her way to the door. My mind is spinning once again when she puts a hand on my shoulder. I look over my shoulder at her and then stand to say goodbye properly.
"Thank you." I say to her and she nods, a sad smile still on her lips.
"I just wanted to let you know that I'm quite the fan of the english language, and the meaning of words." I nod, curious as to where she's going with this. "And Anastasia means 'Reborn'." She gives me a nod of farewell and turns on her heels.
My heart rate immediately picks up as I feel panic swelling within me. She must know, she has to. Why would anyone just happen to bring up the meaning of a name that coincidentally fits me so perfectly. I feel my throat tense up with fear when Mara turns, now walking backwards, to face me.
"Know what Mara means?" I shake my head.
"It means death."