It's just like my dream. Only better. Because this time, I know it's real. She's really here. She is really in my arms. It's more than I could have hoped for. It's all I've wanted since leaving her at the hospital. She leans into me and I can feel her heart beating quickly against my chest. My hands move slowly from her face to the back of her neck, holding her close. I don't want this to end. She is all I want.

All too soon, she pulls back. I open my eyes to see her looking down, her cheeks bright red.

"That was nice." I can't stop myself from smiling again.

"Yeah it was." The nervousness in her voice betrays her. She won't look me in the eye.

"Tara, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's just… what are we doing Christian? Why did you kiss me?"

"You grabbed my hand and pulled me towards you! It was all I could think about doing."

"So this is my fault?" She asks quietly, stepping back, breaking the hold I have on her.

"What? No! That's not what I meant…" I reply gently, reaching out and hold her hand.

"Then what did you mean?" She pulls her hand away. "I'm so confused! First you ignore me for months, then you make me feel like an idiot in front of Zach… and now you kiss me as if we're still together! I don't understand you! None of it makes any sense!"

I can hear the frustration in her voice and it hurts that she doesn't see how much I've missed her, how much I regret leaving her alone. But how can she? I have done everything in my power to avoid her, to stay away. I haven't given her any reason to believe that I still want to be with her. I got so caught up in my own head that I didn't think about how my decision would affect her in the long run. Some things never change.

I step closer to her and take her hands in mine again, searching for the right words to say, hoping to show her how much I want to make things right.

"Tara I'm sorry... for ignoring you and for saying all that stupid stuff in Zach's office. I was just so angry! When I visited you in the hospital, I knew you were going to be upset that I was turning down the company but you didn't even give me a chance to explain, to tell you that working here was what I wanted more than anything. I decided to stay away because I've disappointed you so much in the past and I didn't want to get in the way. Then you could concentrate on getting better and not have to think about anything else."

I hold my breath as I wait for her to say something. She smiles sadly again and I can see the toll the last few months have taken on her. She has dark circles under eyes and their usual brightness has dulled a little. I can't stop myself from thinking that it's all my fault. How could I have been so cruel? I should have been there for her! I should have helped her!

"Christian, you could never disappoint me!" She says reassuringly, squeezing my hands tightly. She lowers her eyes. "I'm sorry too."

"For what?" I ask, a little confused. She is the last person who should be apologizing for anything!

"For making you feel like what you wanted wasn't good enough! After you left my room, I wanted to stop you, call you back, but it hurt too much. Knowing you had gotten a contract and I may never get one. It made my dream seem even farther away. And the fact that you didn't want it! That you had everything and you weren't going to take it! I couldn't wrap my head around it… I didn't know how to deal with the possibility of not dancing again – being stuck in one place when everyone else was moving forward."

"Hey, come here." There are tears in her eyes as I pull her into my arms and hold her tightly. She rests her head on my shoulder and I lean my head against hers and breathe her in, her scent even more overwhelming than it was in my dream.

Eventually she lifts her head and I hear her laugh softly.

"What's so funny?"

"Your shirt is all wet. Sorry."

"No worries. I'll send you the dry-cleaning bill," I smirk, knowing it will be dry before class even starts.

"Haha. Since when do you own clothes that need to be dry-cleaned?" She teases back and I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Ouch! That hurt Training Bra!" I raise my eyebrows and put my hand on my chest, pretending to be offended.

"You'll get over it."

She shoots me a crooked smile and walks back over to the barre. She leans back against the barre and stares at Sammy's picture. She furrows her eyebrows and her purses her lips tightly together. I follow her and after a few minutes of silence, I can't take it anymore. I need to know what she is thinking.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

She looks down at the floor. "I just miss him so much. Even after all this time, it still hurts that he's gone. I'm never going to see him again, talk to him again, hear him laugh again. I keep thinking that it will get better, that I'll somehow get over everything that's happened…"

She stops and bites her lip, fighting her tears, trying her best to hold it all in. Seeing her like this makes me even angrier at myself than I already am.

"When I took my first steps after surgery, when I left the hospital, when I started rehab... I would have given anything to have him there. I had my parents and Kat, even Abigail and Ollie, but it wasn't the same. If only he was there to tell me it was going to be okay, that I was going to get through it… he always knew exactly what to say."

Even though I know she is talking about Sammy, I can't help feeling guilty. That I wasn't there for her. That I left her all alone when she needed me the most. My heart aches as I try to imagine what the past few months would have been like if I hadn't ignored her, if I had gone to see her, helped her through her recovery. Would it have been easier for her? Would she have healed faster? Would she have been able to walk sooner? Dance sooner? Would we be together now? I can't keep the last thought out of my head, no matter how hard I try. I can't believe that I wasted so much time! All because of some stupid promise I made to myself.

"He was brilliant, wasn't he?" I look up at his photo and the guilt I'm feeling doubles. He wouldn't have let me behave so badly! He would have yelled at me, told me how stupid I was being. He wouldn't have left her all alone like I had. He always did the right thing.

"He never would have treated you like I did. He would have been there for you. I told myself that you were angry at me, that you didn't want to see me. I convinced myself that it was what you wanted. But I was only thinking about myself, what was easier for me. You were always so strong and seeing you broken, fighting to put yourself back together, knowing there was nothing I could do…"

"Christian, my fall wasn't your fault. You can't keep punishing yourself for things that you have no control over! That's what gets you into so much trouble! You let all the bad stuff mess with your head. I know because I did the same thing! When I was in the hospital, I was so scared and I took it out on you."

Again, I can see the tears in her eyes and I try to process everything she has just said. I can't let her think that this is her fault. She has enough to deal with right now! All I want is to help her. After causing her so much pain, I just want to make her feel better.

"I'm sorry for pushing you away, for leaving you alone after your surgery! I should have known better. After working so hard to be friends again, to get back to normal, I just let it go! You needed me and I wasn't there and I would do anything to change that! I would-"

"Christian stop!" She places her hand on my arm and cuts me off gently. "We've both made mistakes! I was so angry at you after our meeting with Zach. Rehab was so hard and the thought of teaching, being back in a proper studio, made it seem like everything was falling into place. I missed you so much and I went into the meeting thinking that we could talk and put everything behind us. Poor Zach. I really let him have it."

"He'll live. I think we both know it wasn't really him you were angry at." I smirk and she smiles and rolls her eyes.

"I told myself that I wasn't going to be angry, that I was going to listen and keep an open mind. There had to be a perfectly good reason why you had stayed away. But when you teased me, I just lost it. I didn't understand why you were acting so strangely and it made me mad! I'm so sorry for what I said."

No matter how much I've tried to forget, her words have been a permanent fixture in my brain, constantly circling, making it hard to keep her out of my mind, motivating me to find any way to make up for my bad behavior.

"Can you forgive me?" She trembles slightly and I quickly wrap my arms around her again.

"Hey, calm down Training Bra! There's nothing to forgive," I say gently in her ear. I reach up and slowly run my fingers through her hair. "Besides, I deserved it. I've been the worst friend in the world! I should be the one asking you to forgive me!"

"Christian, you don't have to keep-"

"Yes I do!" I pull back and look straight into her eyes. "You need to know how much I regret the last few months, how much I've missed you! There were so many times when I wanted to call you-"

"Then why didn't you?" She asks. "All those horrible things I said… I didn't mean any of them! That's why I left you so many messages! I didn't want you to blame yourself for the way I acted."

It's easy to see she's telling the truth. It's written all over her face. She had wanted to see me! Why had I let myself think that she didn't? After everything we've been through, I still hadn't learned my lesson! What was that saying about history repeating itself? I was living proof of that for sure.

"Tara… I've made so many mistakes. I let so much get in the way! No matter how good things were between us, I always found some way to ruin it! I didn't want to put you through that again… I wanted you to be happy-"

"I'm happy when I'm with you!" She blurts out. I raise my eyebrows slightly and her cheeks turn bright red again. She smiles shyly and I can see the wheels turning frantically in her head, trying to find something to say to make up for her momentary slip. She hadn't wanted to give so much away.

"What I meant to say was, I know I put a lot of pressure on you when we were in school but I only wanted the best for you. I loved you so much and the thought of not being with you scared me. Like the only way we could be together was if we were both in the company. But now, seeing this place…"

She squeezes my hand and as she looks around the space, her eyes light up in a way that reminds me of the Tara of old – the Tara who hadn't been knocked flat on her back such a short time ago, who still had everything going for her, who still believed anything was possible. Seeing her like this gives me hope that things can go back to the way they were before she fell – with her at the top and everyone else scrambling to catch up.

"It's alright," I smirk, shrugging my shoulders. "It's a far cry from the glamorous life of a company dancer but I get by."

"It's more than alright! It's amazing! I used to think being in the company was all that mattered, that it was the only option. But being here… with you… seeing how comfortable you are, how happy you are! It gives me hope that there are other options, that even if I can't dance..."

She pauses and I let her words sink in. How can she already know how much I love working here? How much teaching means to me? It baffles me because she hasn't even seen me in action. She hasn't even seen this place at its best. But I'm not surprised. She's always been good at getting in my head. She's always been able to read me like a book. It used to make me angry because there were so many things that I didn't want out in the open. I didn't want everyone to know every little detail about my life. To know that I was hurting and that all I wanted was to be left alone. But unlike everyone else, she ignored the warning signs. Whether it was because she didn't pick up on them or because she just didn't care, she never let me off the hook.

"Tara don't say that!" I scold gently, taking her hands in mine. As much as I would love for her to teach here with me, her not dancing isn't something I want to think about. She has to be able to dance! She needs to dance! It's all she's ever wanted! It's her dream! She can't possibly be thinking about giving up! Not yet! She's come so far, accomplished so much. She still has so much left to give.

"It's still early," I explain when she narrows her eyes slightly. "You've still got plenty of time to figure that out. We'll take it slow, one day at a time."

"We?" She asks doubtfully, her voice cracking at the end. She isn't sure what to make of my declaration but it doesn't stop her eyes from flickering with excitement.

"Yes, we." I answer her with as much certainty as I can. She needs to know that I mean every word, that I'm not going to waste any more time, that I can't afford to.

"I'm not going to let you down again Tara. I am going to be here for you. I promise. As much as you may have needed me, I needed you too. It scared me how much I needed you, which is part of the reason why I pushed you away. I thought I knew what was best for me, for both of us, but as usual I was wrong. Instead of making things better, I only made them worse."

She continues to study me and I know she's trying to figure out for sure if I'm telling the truth. I can't blame her. I hold her gaze, willing her to believe me. Please Tara, I beg silently in my head. Please.

It must work because after a few moments, she smiles and squeezes my hands and I can't help but smile back. A growing warmth spreads through my body and before I can stop myself, I lean in to kiss her again.

"Christian…" she whispers. I hear the worry in her voice and it stops me in my tracks.

"Yeah?" I ask, leaning my forehead against hers, keeping my eyes closed.

"I have to go..." My eyes fly open and I can see the regret in hers as she lets go of my hands and leans over to grab her bag. I silently chide myself for acting so impulsively. What is wrong with me? We've barely spoken in four months and I just assume that we can pick up right where we left off?

"Tara, I'm sorry. Please don't go. Stay for class," I beg, unable to hide the desperation in my voice.

"It's okay Christian." She checks her watch, then looks up and places her hand on mine. "I can't stay but thank you for today. It meant a lot." She holds my stare, then lets go of my hand and I turn to watch as she heads for the door.

"Tara wait!" I blurt out loudly, and walk over to her, trying to do everything in my power to keep her with me as long as possible.

"Yes Christian?" She asks. As she turns, I see a glimmer of hope flash across her face.

"Do you drink coffee?" I ask hesitantly.

"I've been known to drink a cup or two here and there," she teases, shrugging her shoulders.

"Good, that's good." My voice is shaky and I can't believe how nervous I am. My stomach has been in knots since I walked into the studio.

"Is that all?"

"Yes – no, I mean…" I struggle to find my words as her questioning eyes pierce into mine. "Would you like to have coffee… with me?" My voice cracks embarrassingly.

"I would love that! Is tomorrow okay?" She asks enthusiastically.

"Works for me. So… can I text you?"

"Do you even have my number?" She asks doubtfully.

"Of course I do!" I exclaim, quickly reaching into my pocket. It's only after I've pulled out my phone that I look up at her and realize she is teasing me, a smug smile on her face.

"Very funny Training Bra, you got me!"

"Apparently. Since when are you so easy to tease?" She shoots back.

"Since now I guess," I scoff and she laughs.

"I've missed that by the way… Training Bra… it's nice to hear again."

"Me too. So… do you need a cab… or a ride?" I ask, trying not to sound too desperate. Before she can answer, her phone dings and she pulls it out of her bag.

"Actually, Kat just texted me. She's outside. She's taking me to therapy."

"I'll walk you out."

"It's almost time for your class. We wouldn't want the star instructor to set a bad example now would we?"

"Too late," I smirk, taking her hand in mine and guiding her towards the door.

She laughs as she leans in to hug me and I do the same, wrapping my arms around her, reveling in her closeness. All too soon she pulls away and my heart sinks at the thought of her leaving.

"Text me about tomorrow, seeing as how you have my number and all."

"Deal."

"Bye Christian," she chirps.

"See you tomorrow Training Bra," I reply, happy when she smiles yet again. I follow her outside and watch as she walks down the wharf to the academy entrance. Just before she rounds the corner, she looks back and waves.

I head back into the studio and walk over to the barre and start to stretch, my sore muscles straining in protest. I ignore them and think of something much more appealing – Tara's skin on mine, the softness of her hair, the warmth of her kiss. I close my eyes and savor the memory of her visit as I sit down on the floor to stretch. When I'm done, I lie back and let myself fall deeper into my daydream.

I don't know how long I lie there, but suddenly I can't shake the feeling that I'm being watched. I open my eyes only to see Jayden and the other students standing over me.

"Dude, you okay?" He asks, trying to hold in his laughter.

"Yeah fine." I sit up and shake my head, bringing myself back to the here and now. "Don't you guys have anything better to do than to spy on me?" I question jokingly.

"Well we thought class was at ten. We just wanted to make sure you weren't dead or anything," Jayden retorts, causing the others to laugh. He is definitely getting too smart for his own good. I check my phone and see that it's nearly ten. I guess time flies when you're distracted.

"Well I'm not so don't just stand there! Start warming up!" I smirk as I grab the remote and stand up. They all laugh again and quickly dump their bags in the corner and take their spots at the barre.

"Okay guys, tendus." I press play and the music starts. I walk slowly around the space making a correction here and there and as we work our way through barre, I try not to think about Tara. I try to focus, to keep my mind on the task at hand. But no matter how hard I try, I can't stop myself from wishing that tomorrow was already here.