Astrid was on Berk, racing on foot through the dim labyrinth of passageways that connected the dragons' recently constructed rookeries and stables. She was chasing after Hiccup, as usual, but he was moving uncommonly quick; her breaths came hard and fast as she tried to keep him in view. They started up a spiral staircase, and somehow she knew they were headed for the forge. She had no idea what he was planning, just that she had to keep up with him—if she didn't, something unknown yet terrible was going to happen.

Her foot missed a step, and she was falling, about to crack her chin on the stone stairs. She jerked backward…

…and the rear of her head collided with her real-life husband's jaw. He shrieked in pain and surprise as the force of her unexpected convulsion knocked him onto his back.

Astrid startled up to a sitting position under the blankets, looking around wildly at the unfamiliar surroundings. It was daylight, though the sun wasn't up over the trees yet. Their dragons were some twenty feet away, grooming each other. It took her a second to remember where they were and what had happened, and she twisted to look at Hiccup, who lay stunned and groaning next to her.

"Dear Odin!" she cried. "Did I push you over? You weren't supposed to move, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

He didn't respond for a few seconds, still gasping for air and coherent thought.

"Don't worry about it," he managed finally. "You've done worse to me, on purpose."

She bent over him and kissed the very tip of his nose, the place she figured was safest.

"That's the problem—you're only supposed to be hurt when I want you to be."

"We don't always get what we want," he grunted.

"Did I break you? Are you okay?"

"I'm not as bad as yesterday," he responded. "The last time I tried to move, I saw stars and almost blacked out. This time I just…aah." He trailed off, a spasm twisting his face, and Astrid felt a sympathetic pinch in her spine. She had been hoping he would be recovered enough this morning for her to undress him and get a better look at his injuries before sending Stormfly home with a note. She cursed herself for not thinking to request a packet of Gothi's painkilling herbs before leaving Berk.

Concerned by the sounds his rider was making, Toothless loped over and nosed at Hiccup's face. He cooed, and licked the angry-looking contusion on the young man's forehead.

"Thanks, bud," he responded. "That one's the least of my issues, though." He let out a determined breath and reached his left hand up to stroke the dragon's nose and scratch his jaw.

Astrid slapped and scraped at her clothes in irritation, trying to dislodge the mud that had caked and dried on her leggings, in the spikes of her skirt, and in the fur of her arm bracers under her jacket sleeves.

"Do I have mud on my face?" she asked Hiccup, unable to extinguish a small spark of personal vanity. She didn't mind getting dirty, not at all, but she wasn't a fan of staying dirty. She'd scraped the warpaint off her face in between Berk and here, on her way after Hiccup the first time.

"Yep," he said. "Looks great on you, milady."

Astrid didn't believe him. She searched her clothing for an available clean patch she could use to scrub her face. She settled for opening her jacket and untucking her tight blouse, pulling it up to reveal bare, soft skin underneath as she swiped the fabric over her cheeks, chin, and forehead.

Hiccup attempted a wolf whistle, but the sound came out parched and hoarse. He doubled over on his side and coughed, grimacing in pain, the dryness in his throat making it hard for him to stop the paroxysm.

Astrid turned to look around until she spotted her pack with their supplies. She knew from unfortunate prior experience what Hiccup looked like when he was dehydrated and undernourished—there was a certain cast to the skin, a particular texture to his lips. Both of which were all too evident this morning.

"When was the last time you had to pee?" she asked bluntly.

Hiccup blinked a few times, embarrassed. "Yesterday afternoon. After I woke up from the crash."

Astrid's nose wrinkled.

"Oh, boy. I sure am looking forward to getting that suit off you now. By which I mean, not at all." She wondered if there was a spring or creek nearby where she might fetch fresh water for cleaning herself and Hiccup both; she wasn't about to use up any of their current drinking supplies, not if there was little chance of replenishing them easily.

"You should drink some more water," she said.

To her surprise, he managed to push himself up on his elbows and take the open water skin from her. He swallowed several deep draughts and she was relieved when after a number of minutes it appeared that the liquid would stay where it belonged.

She made him eat some more bread, and a piece of fruit, then tried to get him up, to see if he had the capacity to climb on Toothless. They would get back to Berk much faster if he could. But it was plain from the look on his face as soon as he tried to roll over to his knees and stand that returning home that way was not an option. He sank back to the ground in a limp armored bundle; she covered him with the woolen blanket again and folded up the oilskin one to put under his head.

Time for Plan B, she thought.

Astrid got out leather parchment and a heavy pencil of the type Hiccup used for map marking. She scrawled instructions. Looking over at him, she chewed the end of the pencil and added a request for Gothi's sleep draught as well as the pain formula.

"Do you have the map on you, babe?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said blankly.

"Can I have it?"

"Yeah."

He made no attempt to move, and she crawled over to him, pulling the map from its pocket on his chest.

"What are you doing?" he said, suddenly alarmed when she opened it up and reached over with the pencil.

"Making it obvious where we are," she answered. "Don't want them to look for us any longer than they have to."

"But, you'll mark it up—"

"Yes," she said firmly. "You're more important to us—to me—than this is right now. You can smudge it out, or replace the panel, later."

"Please," he protested, but Astrid ignored him and finished preparing the message parcel for Stormfly. He put his head back down on the oilskin, looking miffed. Though the sun had risen and it was warming their forest glade, he pulled the blanket up higher and coughed.

She glanced over again as she attached the message bag to her dragon's tack. "Sulking doesn't befit the chief of Berk," she said lightly.

"I'm not sulking," Hiccup replied. "I'm grieving my fine artwork."

Astrid stepped back and knelt next to him, gently pressing the back of her fingers to his forehead, not letting him see her frown.

"Stormfly," she called. "It's time, girl. Fetch help."

The dragon squawked and took off for home.

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After sending off Stormfly, Astrid stayed by Hiccup's side for awhile, stroking and shushing him until he appeared to be asleep again. She knew for sure he was out when she bent down and kissed his forehead near his temple and received no response, not even the flicker of an eyelash.

She calculated in her head how long it might be until anyone from Berk arrived. Two hours, maybe a little less, for Stormfly to make it home, if the wind was in her favor. Some time for their rescuers to prepare. Two more hours, at least, for the trip from Berk; more if another storm came up to delay their departure. On a pessimistic view, it might be close to nightfall again before anyone showed up.

Feeling restless, and still curious about a potential source of fresh water, she got up carefully and beckoned to Toothless.

"I'm going hunting for a stream," she said. "Stay here." Of course he'll stay. Has it ever been easy to separate them?

As though he'd read her mind, the black dragon blinked and rolled his eyes. Astrid gave him the rest of the fish she'd packed—there weren't many, and she wanted them consumed before they started to smell. He gulped them down, then settled next to Hiccup, spreading a wing over him to keep off the intensifying sun.

Astrid shed her heavy jacket and folded it next to her pack. She took a final glance over their makeshift campsite, then slung her axe across her back and headed off into the woods. She ventured further and further in, climbing over rotting logs, using her arm bracers to fend off the incursions of sticker branches, listening for the sound of running water.

Every fifty paces, she marked a tree with her heavy pencil so she could find her way back, keeping her eye on the sun, not wanting to be gone too long. She didn't doubt Toothless's ability to protect Hiccup, but she didn't want the boy to wake and panic at her absence.

He's not a boy anymore, she reminded herself. He's the chief of Berk, and a married man.

Out here though, alone with the sounds of unfamiliar birds, breathing in the piney scent that hung all around in the air, everything that had recently transpired at home felt far away and strange in her memory. Even her mental images of their wedding (was it really only two days ago?) had taken on a slightly surreal quality, the new, odd-feeling metal love token on her finger the only immediate proof that it had even taken place.

The ring was a simple yet delicate silver rope of two strands, the outer and inner rims slightly flattened so it would feel more natural and less noticeable on her hand. Leave it to Hiccup to think of a small, thoughtful detail like that. She wished she had found him slightly less injured, to give them a chance to hide out here a few more days and relax; she increased her pace, determined to conclude her search quick enough to guarantee them at least some time to talk before the rescue party could arrive. Once they were back on Berk, Frigga only knew what might be in store for them.

She grew hot and hungry, and was nearly ready to turn back toward camp when she heard it: the dim whoosh of a stream. She came across it over the next small ridge and followed it up for several minutes, hoping to find the source to ensure the water was decently uncontaminated.

The spring did eventually appear, but with it came something else, unwelcome and unsettling. There was a dead body lying in the hollow where the spring bubbled up. The body of a dragon.

Astrid crept closer for a better look. It was a Nadder; not Stormfly! thank the gods, it had different coloring and was smaller, but it was in bad shape, as though it had died of unnatural causes. Astrid glanced around nervously, concerned that whatever was strong enough to bring down a Deadly Nadder might still be lurking nearby.

There was a rustling noise from a neighboring bush; she retreated several paces and crouched, pulling her axe from her back and holding it in front of her, ready to strike, or turn and run.

She stood up and sighed in relief as two more Nadders, babies only a few months grown, crawled out from underneath. They squeaked piteously as they saw what Astrid assumed was the body of their mother.

"Aw, I'm sorry, guys," she said. She wished she had brought some dragon nip along to placate them. She wanted nothing more than to sit down and play with them, but didn't want to risk getting bitten or scratched. Not while she was alone, a mile away from her pack, with a dragon-killing something still out there.

Astrid turned to leave, and gestured at the infant reptiles. My clothes probably smell like dragon nip and fish. Maybe I can still persuade them to follow me. They'll have a better chance with me than out here in the wild without a parent.

"Come on, babies," she said, following up with one of the Nadder vocalizations that Valka had taught her: the one that was supposedly closest to I love you. She used it on Stormfly all the time, and also occasionally on Hiccup (to tease him, since she refused to tell him what it meant). To her delight they came after her, hopping along and flapping their tiny wings to clear the logs as she clambered over them on her way back to the camp.

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As Astrid reentered the forest glade, she saw that Hiccup had woken and was sitting against the moss-covered boulder near where she had discovered him the previous night. She was glad to find him vertical instead of horizontal this time, and it looked like some of the color had returned to his face.

As she approached, however, he didn't smile at her.

"Where were you?" he asked.

"I went looking for fresh water," she replied. "You were asleep, and I wasn't gone long. I don't think."

"You scared me. I didn't have any clue what happened to you. What if you had been attacked by a Whispering Death or something?"

Astrid pssh-ed and sat down next to him. "You think I can't deal with one of those?" She lifted his bangs again to check the bump on his head. "That looks mildly better than before. Are you still dizzy?"

"Some," he said, pulling his head away from her to look toward the edge of the glade. "What are those?"

The Nadder babies came forward, chirping as they approached the two young people. Toothless gave an inquisitive grunt, and looked at Hiccup for guidance as to whether he should make them keep their distance.

"I found them by the spring," Astrid explained. "Their mother had been downed by something—" not wanting to worry him further, she decided to leave off speaking of which, I hope whatever it is doesn't find us before our friends do.

"Great," said Hiccup. "Just what we need, more mouths to feed." He leaned his head back against the rock and closed his eyes.

"Aw, come on," Astrid wheedled. "Valka—I mean, your mom—brought so many dragons with her already. They'll fit right in, I'm sure they won't be noticed. I even bet Stormfly will foster them until she has her next clutch."

"I didn't say no," Hiccup responded tiredly.

Astrid let him be for a few minutes, while she ate a small meal and took some sips from the water skin. She had a small amount of chicken left that she hadn't given to Stormfly, and she tossed it to the baby Nadders, who gobbled it up eagerly. They started trying to play with Toothless, and he humored them with some reluctance. They chased him round and round in the trees, trying to clamp onto his tail.

Astrid attempted to get Hiccup to drink some more water, but he turned it down.

"Well," she said, and started to run her fingers through his thick auburn hair, picking out pieces of dirt and pine needles. "This isn't where I had planned for us to spend time alone after the wedding. It's pretty now that the rain stopped, though."

Hiccup didn't respond for a minute; he was listlessly studying the pattern of tree leaves overhead. He regretted having let Astrid talk him into eating so much earlier. It wasn't sitting well and he sincerely hoped he wouldn't have to roll over suddenly and be sick.

Her words finally registered in his brain and he sighed.

He reached up and pulled her hands away from his hair, leaving the new braid uncompleted.

"I've decided I still don't like secrets, Astrid," he said.

"I'm not apologizing for that one," she responded, a little defensively. "You were so set on continuing your chief duties in spite of the wedding, and I didn't think it was worthwhile to argue with you when we were both so frazzled. So I took care of it. I wanted you to myself."

"You got your wish," said Hiccup bitterly. "Happy with where things ended up?"

"Not particularly. You know this isn't how either one of us wanted to start our marriage."

"Why not?" he mused, "we started our relationship…sort of…on the same day I lost a foot."

"At least we started off on the right foot," Astrid punned, and he groaned. "Damn it, Astrid, I told you, no more jokes."

"Sorry."

"Are you?" he looked at her sideways, his tone carrying a resonance of suspicion she wasn't accustomed to and wasn't sure how to interpret.

"What do you mean?" she asked, a bit hurt.

"I'm not sure I can believe your apologies anymore. You lied to me earlier."

"I didn't lie to you. I…withheld information."

"Information you thought was important, that you thought I might want to know."

"You were already so busy, and stressed, with losing your dad, with the village, with everything…"

"You think that matters? Don't make excuses, Astrid, this is the rest of my life we're talking about. Our marriage."

"You're one to talk," Astrid pushed back, feeling uncomfortable. "You hid a dragon from everyone for weeks! You think people wouldn't have wanted to know about that?"

"And good thing they didn't, they would have killed him! Do you really think the two situations are equivalent?" he demanded.

"…no." Astrid couldn't deny that she wished she had told him everything, much earlier, about what had happened on Drago's ship, but she resented that he refused to let it go.

"Okay then," said Hiccup.

"Okay, what?" she said. "I'm sorry, Hiccup, what more do you want? I wish I could undo everything, but I can't. Can't you drop it? You forgave your mom for abandoning you—you even invited her to move in with us after the wedding, without asking me first, I might add—"

"You think I'm thrilled about that?" he countered, the pitch of his voice rising. "I'm not, the whole thing freaks me out, but she's my mom and she obviously wants to be around me and I love her, I guess, what am I supposed to say to her, 'No, parent I haven't seen in twenty years, please live somewhere else?' And we barely know each other, and she's always there, trying to pull me away from my village responsibilities to teach me new dragon stuff. And I'd like to go, but I can't, and if I did, who knows, Eret might whisk you off with those big, muscled arms of his—"

"What?" she screeched.

"Come on, I've seen you checking him out whenever he carries a load of new shingles by your work area. You can't deny he's got that whole…scarred dragon trapper...style…thing…going on, and I don't like how he looks at you, as though he knows what you look like under your clothes—"

"I don't know what you're talking about, you usually assign us to opposite ends of the village!"

"Because of what I said!"

"So? Am I not allowed to look at anyone who isn't you?" Astrid had forgotten about his latent jealous streak; she hadn't seen much of it since the year he had nearly beaten Snotlout in the Thawfest games, and she was unpleasantly reminded now of how much she disliked it.

"I didn't say that," said Hiccup, "I just—"

"You know what, Hiccup?" Astrid interrupted, fed up. "You say you're tired of secrets. Well, here you go. Yes, sometimes I admire Eret's arms. And his butt, too, if you're interested to know. In fact, I've checked out every boy on Berk, and some of the girls, too."

Hiccup's mouth dropped open, and he gaped at her.

"And you know what else? You remember how you showed me those drawings for the mountain carving of your dad, and I said it was great? Well, I don't think it's great. I think it's the tackiest thing I've ever seen, but I said otherwise, because I could see how much it meant to you, and I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

Hiccup still didn't respond, and she pushed on, "I also hate that you don't like mead, because I do, and I want to slap you every time you scowl at me for drinking it. I hate that you always ignore me when I tell you that you're limping from your prosthetic and I hate that I'm the sucker who always ends up bandaging your leg later. I also hate your wingsuit, not because of how it looks on you, because you're damned hot in it, but because you spend more time messing with it than you spend with me, and because one of these days you're going to make a mistake like you did yesterday, only the next time it might KILL you, and then I don't know what I'd do, probably throw myself off a sea stack, because you're the only boy I've ever loved, and I can't stand the idea of living without you…" she trailed off, and put her face in her hands while Hiccup stared in shock.

After a long minute, she looked up at him, her eyes red and swollen.

"Those are all the secrets I can think of right now. I'll let you know if I remember any more. Oh, yeah: there's something on this island that kills Deadly Nadders."

00

"Something that…kills Nadders?" Hiccup repeated hoarsely. His mind was reeling from Astrid's revelations, and he latched onto the one thing that felt concrete and immediate.

She nodded. "You should have seen the body, all torn up and mangled. It wasn't pretty."

"I don't like that at all. When you said 'brought down,' I assumed you meant a disease or an accident or something…we both know that even Toothless won't mess with Stormfly when she's having a bad day."

Hiccup looked down at the flame sword clasped to his leg, as if to make sure it was still there. He took a deep breath—it caught inside, and he lurched forward, coughing into the crook of his elbow.

Toothless made his way back over to them, dragging along the Nadder babies that had clamped onto the end of his tail above the back fin. He pressed his head into Hiccup's shoulder and moaned in concern, nudging his rider with his nose.

Hiccup winced and pushed his friend away gingerly. He continued to cough. Astrid couldn't tell if it was from lingering dehydration or the stress of their argument. Nerves buzzing, she wrapped her arm gently around his lower back and tried not to picture splintered bone interacting with delicate lung tissue.

Her previous unburdening suddenly felt childish and self-centered. Gods, why couldn't I have waited until we were home?

"He's telling you to lie down, babe."

"I can't," said Hiccup, once the spasm had passed. "Not any more, with a creature…or a person…that can do that kind of damage, on the loose."

"It'll be ok," she responded. "Toothless won't let anything happen to us." She pulled him down carefully so his head was resting in her lap.

"He's at a disadvantage," Hiccup said, twisting in vexation. "What if he goes off the cliff edge? He almost drowned when one of my mom's dragons plucked me out of the saddle, before…"

"Stop it," said Astrid, desperate to get him to relax. "Quit struggling, you'll hurt yourself." She smoothed his hair away from his face with firm, caring strokes, furious with herself for her mistimed outburst, for letting him bait her into recounting her laundry list of buried hurts. Hiccup sighed and lay still, giving himself over to her ministrations.

"You win, milady. Just—take this, okay? You might need it." He reached down blindly and unhooked the flame sword, holding it up over his face so she could reach it.

Astrid turned it over in her hand, feeling the heft and weight of the wrought metal, making sure she located the controls.

"Remember, babe, I've never used this before. Not for real. You only gave me a brief tutorial, right after you finished it and couldn't stop blabbing about it to everyone on the island—" she broke off when his eyes squeezed in embarrassment.

"You know," he said, "Some things are okay to keep secret."

Astrid was silent, choosing instead to keep inspecting the fine details of the unfamiliar weapon. Eventually she put it down on the ground next to them and leaned over her husband. She kissed his mouth, upside-down, as he lay in her lap. Their lips moved in awkward tandem, the half-grown peach fuzz on his chin tickling her nose.

"I'm sorry," he said to her in parting.

"Sorry for…"

"Sorry for pushing you. You can check out other guys all you want, I swear, just as long as—"

She cut him off with another kiss. "I've never been anything but loyal to you," she said. "Even when I was yammering foolishly to Drago, it was out of good motivation. Once I realized what a mistake it was, I didn't tell you about it because I couldn't bear to find out what you look like when you're really disappointed."

"Gods," said Hiccup, and he put his hand over his eyes. "And I made you tell me, and then I yelled at you. I'll never forget the look on your face, like you were afraid of me. It makes me sick just thinking about it. I love you, you should never be afraid of me. I don't want that kind of power over you."

"Aren't you afraid of me?" Astrid asked, feeling guilty again. "I mean, how many times did I stick my axe under your chin when we were younger? And our bruise-to-kiss ratio is still pretty even."

"You're terrifying," he agreed. "In a good way, though."

"Except, when, you know, I say things that make you look like I've ripped your kidneys out. Like three years ago."

"You made it up to me later, I recall. I'd forgotten about that almost, you've only been kind to me since—"

"Still, I think I owe you the chance to pay me back for the last bunch of stuff I dumped on you."

"Hey, I asked for it. Bringing up Eret, what the Hel was I thinking…"

"Come on, I told you all my secrets, it's your turn."

Hiccup hesitated. "There's nothing to say. You're perfect, I don't deserve you—" Astrid pulled her fist back to whack him out of reflex, remembering only just in time that he was hurt. She put her hand down and tapped his nose again instead.

"I mean it. Tell me now, before our ride shows up and I lose my nerve."

"All right," Hiccup said. "I thought Heather was really pretty."

Astrid rolled her eyes. "Lame. We already knew that, why else would you have made such dumb decisions? Try again."

"Um…I pictured you naked, starting when I was twelve?"

"You and Snotlout both. One more chance."

"Ugh, I'll never be able to look at 'Lout the same way again. In fact, I might have to punch his nose."

"Quit stalling."

Hiccup was quiet for awhile. Rocks started to form in the pit of Astrid's stomach as her mind flipped through all the things he might say. What if he tells me he didn't want to marry me after all. What if he wants me to stay home and become a fat housewife with ten Viking brats. What if he actually likes boys.

Finally he said tentatively, "I don't like how you talk to my mom."

Oh, that's worse.

"I don't know what you mean. I'm always polite to her."

"It's not the words. It's the look on your face, like you think she chose to exist and lose her Alpha dragon just so she could move here and spite you."

Astrid realized she was clenching her teeth and forced herself to release her jaw. "That's not quite it. It's more like I resent her for abandoning you in the first place, and taking advantage of your kind nature to push herself into your life again, and take up all your time…"

"And what else is she going to do?" asked Hiccup. He hissed air in preparation and rolled off of Astrid's lap. He propped himself on his side and glared at her. "She's excited for me, and we both love dragons—"

"She's obsessed," exclaimed Astrid. "You love dragons, I love dragons, but she loves dragons more than people, I think. We do have people on Berk, in case you've forgotten, and they've been there much longer than the dragons have—"

"You think I don't know there are people on Berk?" Hiccup said harshly. "I think about it all the time, even when I have a spare minute for anything else, including you. Now that I'm chief, I can't avoid all the people on Berk. How many of them do you think saw me stomp to the forge yesterday? How many old biddies know we've fought, and will probe me about it for gossip when we get back, pretending to be concerned?"

Astrid smiled at him wryly, trying to diffuse the renewed tension. "Probably most of them. You'll just have to parade me through the village later, pinching my butt, so they'll know everything's okay."

"Are we okay?" asked Hiccup. He looked pale and Astrid was afraid he would start coughing again.

"Yes," she said firmly, and held up her hand with the ring. "Unless you want this back, but it would seem like a waste of all the trouble we went to in order to get it on my finger."

"Okay," said Hiccup. He turned to his back and put his arm over his face, his position a daytime parallel of the one he had assumed on their wedding night. Astrid waited a few minutes, but he didn't speak again and after awhile she heard the deep, even breaths of sleep.

Whew. That conversation turned more dangerous than I'd expected. I bet he's exhausted.

…I really hope Stormfly made it back all right.

They still had a long time to wait for their retrieval party. Astrid scooted away from Hiccup a few feet so as not to disturb him, and started playing fetch with the Nadder babies.

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A/N: I really want someone to make a crack vid where Valka sings "Dragons are better than people..." Tra la la.