A/N
I dont own Harry Potter
Dumbledore prided himself on his savy business strengths, and in no way was this more personified than in selling the schools flowers, illegally of course, afterall Dumbledore aknowledged that he was indeed a crook!
"Hello, Mr. Sickler, you must be Professor Sprout's assistant (Dumbledore always went when Sprout was not here as she dissaproved of him stealing plants), do you per chance have any marigolds?" Dumbledore asked in a sing song voice.
"Yeah" he huffed exidedly "We have THOUSANDS" he exclaimed.
Just then Ginny wheeled in, with a crossbow and a knife. "Happy Halloween suckas" she screamed.
Dumbledore ignored her as he took the marigolds. Just then Sickler and Ginny began making out. Dumbledore looked away as Sickler joined Ginny on the wheelchair.
It was well known that George Potter had died due to complications with the mind altering Dumbkedore had done to transform him from George Weasley into George Potter. Soon Ginny and Sickler rolled away and Dumbledore finished his shopping.
Meanwhile
Ronald was watching the portrait of the fat lady with an impish grin. Sure enough, Seamus emerged with Parvati, Ron immediately blocked their path.
" Hey sweetness, how bout you leave Patil and give daddy some sugar" Ron said closing his eyes and puckering his lips as he glided over to Seamus, who responded with a punch.
Seamus was not in the mood, because of Ronald Weasley, his best friend Dean, was transfering schools and Ronald Weasley was in no trouble. Worse yet Ronald was still trying to douse him with love potion and even tried to spray him with a squirtgun loaded with love potion.
Later that evening
Ron Weasley was pouting and spouting off lies as he watched Parvati feed Seamus grapes and tacos. Suddenly the doors to the great hall burst open, it was Molly. She was wearing a crop top that put her disgusting fat belly on display for all to see.
She immediatly went to Ron. "Where is he Ron, I want to see him cry for breaking my Ronnies heart."
Ronald gave a sob as he pointed at Seamus. Molly jumped over the table but was stopped by Dean, who was here to get the last of his things before transferring.
" I think Ron's already broken you in, he and Seamus belong together" she cackled as she attempted steal some grub from the table, before being punched and somehow knocked out by Dean.
Ron Weasley made one last attempt to get to Seamus by launching himself at him. as he arrived he attempted to punch Parvati but tripped over Molly.
Molly was put in a sleep state by Snape and transferred to the ministry where Dumbledore vouched for her, saying he could keep her under control. The ministry was skeptical.
"My friends Molly is meerly worried that Arthur is missing" he cooed to the ministry employees.
Eventually Molly was allowed to be in housing on the Hogwarts grounds so Dumbledore could keep an eye on her. Perhaps Dumbledore using blackmail helped.
While Molly was tucked away in her yellow house making soup, Dumbledore had a new problem.
Madam Derusa and her assistant and wife Toni were the new cooks, sinse Hermione was able to free the houselvess by tricking them into freeing themselves.
Madam Derusa was a terrible cook, and Dumbledore nearly fainted when she brought her excuse of a pineapple upside down cake in for his inspection. It was so pale as Madam Derusa was too cheap to use brown sugarvand real butter, it also had no cherries in the middle of the pineapple.
After yelling at her and explaining that Hogwarts is known for its food she stormed out and came back later with a can of mixed fruit. "Theres always room for desert" she cackled and threw the can at his head.
An hour later
An angry Dumbledore was nursing a bump on his head when Derusa's assistant Toni sauntered into his office. "I miss Gene" she wailed too which Dumbkedore ignored her. Feeling anger at Dumbledore's lack of caring Toni vowed to cut the lettuce with a knife causing it to oxidate and taste bad!
Molly was in the park trying to be normal when a soccer ball hit her in the shin. As the smiling kid asked for it back, his smile evaporated and turned to horror as Molly sank her tooth intonthe ball and the park was amplified by the sound of a deflating ball.
Meanwhile Hagrid chuckled darkly as he had enlisyed the help of some friends to mess with Dumbledore, the cat creatures. Each looked like a person wxcept for fur, sharp nails, and cat ears.
Hagrid chuckled as this would not be Dumbledore's day. How dare he let Molly live next.to his hut! Molly had stolen pumpkins and parts off his motorcycle.
one hour later
Three cat creatures stood on a hill overlooking Hogwarts as ligheting stuck. "Reoooor" they screamed before desending.
The doors to the great hall burst open, to reveal the cat creatures who began devouring and scratching everyone. "Now what" Dumbledore screamed
Dumbledore knew there were more evil forces than Voldemort, and he got caught up in a war with the cat creatures Pet Ra, Lin Da, and Paul La. " Reorr" Pet Ra hissed as Dumbledore feinted briefly.
Dumbledore ran out towards the black lake to escape the cat creatures, when he saw a ferry of all things. "Since when are boats allowed on the lake" Dumbledore roared at a white haired man with a thick mustache. " It be a little chilly out here" the man who identified himself as Dink said in a poor attempt at a cajon accent.
Dumbledore ignored him, before Dink too turned into a cat creature. " Dont insult my pride" he roared at the retreating Dumbledore.
Dink had almost caught up with Dumbledore before the Weasleys old car, which Ronald and Neville crashed in the Forbidden Forest arrived. The door opened and Dumbledore barraled in.
Once inside a man with an old trucker hat and boiler suit asked Dumbledore in a haunting voice, "Im Johnny Hop, where to?"
"The Hogs Head will do." said Dumbledore in a snoody voice dripping with hunger and thirst.
"Comin right up" Hop said pleasently and with a chuckle before puking on the steering wheel and burning rubber. This would be a ride the aging headmaster would never forget.