Chapter 30
One year and almost 2 months later, this old tale is still going strong. And I've hit 30 chapters. Even though reviews peter out, I'm seeing new subscribers and new favourites so THANK YOU to everyone still showing this some love! I've learned not to take fanfic too seriously and just enjoy it as a cheeky sideline while I find more inspiration for my 3 original novels that are sitting on the backburner!
Cesaro. What side of the coin do you sit? Do you think he should go and do his own thing after all the crap thrown his way in the previous chapter? Or should he have just toughened up and told Sheamus the truth from the off? We shall see...
One half of J&J Security, former cruiserweight Jamie Noble, awoke with a start. This was not his hotel room. And he was ass-naked. His ass was sore.
He rubbed his eyes and sat up, and jumped a little as he saw the Herculean form of Cesaro sleeping beside him. Oh fuck. What had he done? He was married with two fucking kids. And he'd just had his cherry popped by a guy.
Cesaro grunted and shuffled as he too, arose from his slumber. He sat up and stretched his long, sinewy arms.
"Morgen," he purred.
Jamie had to admit there was never a moment where this guy did not look good. Cesaro had a magnetism about him. He was the sort of guy who even the straightest, manliest, most homophobic bros would question their sexuality over.
"Morning," the elder man grunted.
"Vant some coffee?" asked Cesaro.
"Er...yeah.."
Cesaro chuckled and leaned over to kiss his prey. He really enjoyed last night. Something about unlocking latent gay desires in a straight man...Jamie sounded like he really enjoyed the sex they had.
Jamie kissed him back and gasped as he felt those long fingers caress inside his thighs.
"Ohhh man..." he moaned, laying back.
"You like it don't you?" Cesaro had the most sultry smirk on his handsome face now. He crawled atop Jamie and began to grind against him.
Jamie nodded. This was such a bad thing. So many sins. But that very idea was just turning him on...and he felt his legs opening, rising and wrapping around the solid mass of pure strength and power that was one half of the Tag Team Champions. He began to kiss Cesaro tenderly.
Cesaro was getting off on how much Jamie was into him. He still had 'It'. The reasons all the other tops used to come to him for tips on how to get their guys going in bed. He should be a sex therapist on the side.
Jamie was grinding hungrily against him. He wanted to be fucked again. This amazing man had touched parts of him that he didn;t know existed. He wanted to try more of this forbidden drug that was man sex.
"Claudio.." he whimpered needily.
Cesaro smirked rather caddishly.
He had a road agent whining his name. He didn't need Sheamus. He could get ANYONE he wanted. And he knew it. Married men always made the hottest lovers as they unleashed their most repressed desires. It was beautiful to see Jamie so...alive.
Maybe he'll try out Mercury next.
Unknowingly he'd just become Miz. Except the alpha top version. Maybe it was the Plastics' bullying that drove him to it. Maybe it was his exasperation at Sheamus being injured and choosing to spend more time and money on his freaking DeLorean than on him. He didn;t know.
He gently kissed the elder man as he fumbled for the lubricant.
"I feel like a chick.." moaned Jamie, his cute Southern accent music to Cesaro;s ears as he kneeled up to coat his fingers.
"Feels nice, huh?" asked Cesaro.
Jamie nodded, a small smile lifting his cute, bearded face. He was 38 but looked a lot younger due to his small stature. He gasped as he was invaded by those long two fingers again.
Cesaro took his time to prep his inexperienced fling properly, to minimise the pain. Bottoming to Sheamus was wild and amazing. But he missed the rush to the brain of truly pleasing a man beneath him. He was a true versatile.
"Where's ze condoms?" he asked.
"Floor.."
Cesaro searched the floor. Ah there was the box of Durex. He fished one out and tore the sachet open with his teeth whilst expertly continuing to finger the desperate Jamie with his free hand.
"Can I...?" asked Jamie, taking the lube bottle.
"Of course." Cesaro straddled Jamie to allow the shorter man to lubricate his cock. Bless. Jamie was being very liberal. But Cesaro was a big guy. And Jamie was very inexperienced. Cesaro decided that he should take extra care. He could tell by the smaller man's wincing that he was very tender back there.
"Wrap your legs around me...good man," he purred in Jamie's ear as he lined up, slowly pushing...slowly...yes..
"Owwww!"
"Relax.."
"Hurts..."
"I can stop.."
"No..don't.."
Cesaro pushed into the elder man some more. And more. He pushed all the way in. Jamie cried out loudly as his spot was smashed once more. Yes. THat was it. The sensation that he first felt last night and now couldn't get enough of. Oh fuck him...fuck him please..
Cesaro slowly began to move in and out, being gentle to allow Jamie to get used to the feeling again. Jamie's moans and whimpers were simply music to the Swiss' ears. Jamie's arms flew around the sinewy neck and their eyes locked.
"Don't stop..." pleaded Jamie.
"I von't stop unless you say stop."
"Ohhh...ohh...yeah...fuck yeah...yeah...fuck..." Jamie was letting go and really enjoying himself now. This was such a unique feeling. So new. So addictive. But he reckoned now...he could take some more punishment. He was a semi-retired pro wrestler after all.
Cesaro was working his hips expertly to touch every sensitive spot inside Jamie. He was going to make this the best sex Jamie ever had. Oh yes. Have him eating out the palm of his hand.
Now he could see why people slept with booking staff. Oh, Cesaro was going to hell for this. Did he care? No.
He pulled Jamie up so the small man was on his lap...cute mews and moans filling the air as Jamie writhed in ecstasy. Cesaro could ask him for anything...and he'd do it...if it meant being made to feel this good. He began to devour Cesaro's lips hungrily.
"You've...been with men before..." purred Cesaro sultrily into Jamie's ear.
Jamie shook his head.
"F..first time...second...ohhhh yeah...you're so good...so good..."
He broke the kisses and stroked Cesaro's face, his own face etched in deep, deep pleasure.
"Vould you like me to make you scream?"
Jamie gave him a tiny smile between gasps.
"Try me."
"You asked for it."
Cesaro threw Jamie down hard and held his legs open and began to pound him hard and mercilessly. Loud curses and cries filled the room as Jamie received the first rough man fucking of his life. Oh yeah! Fuck yes! He couldn't get enough! And still his g-spot was being smashed. He was getting his back truly blown open and fucking loved every second.
He was fisting his leaking cock furiously.
Cesaro paused. Deep inside that ultra-tight ass.
He slapped Jamie's hand away.
"C'mon man!" protested Jamie.
"I vont to make you cum."
Oh yeah...Jamie forgot he'd shot his load without touching himself last night. He threw his hands behind him and just fully submitted to the Swiss stud. Yes. He began to scream and shout, fully unleashing his bicurious desires and taking this fuck like a champ. Oh yeah. He'll never call anyone a fag again. Not if sex with men felt like this. Fuck yeah! More.
"M'gonna...m'gonna..." he panted between wanton screams and curses.
Cesaro was getting close too...just watching Jamie let go and enjoy this was a huge turn-on. Yeah, cmon straight man, take it...Jamie's screams getting louder...come on, let go...
Jamie's skin was on fire...his ass was stinging...his spine throbbing...a hard pulling behind his abs that just wouldn't go away...he couldn't take much more...yes...oh yes...he was about to explode...he couldn't stop it...he threw his head back and screamed at the top of his lungs as his release seared, burned and erupted all over his stomach...his chest...even his neck. He had come HARD.
Cesaro contined to pound the spent man beneath him, urging his own climax out.../c'mon...he was channelling Sheamus and he didn't realise...he was hissing and snarling like a caged bear...before driving deep into Jamie and bellowing, cursing in French as he orgasmed hard.
It burned on its way out. But GOD did it feel good.
That was very satisfying sex.
Cesaro felt like a man again.
He pulled out of Jamie, removing the condom and knotting it.
"You're bleeding a little," he hissed.
Jamie went white.
"S'OK," Cesaro said, clumsily getting out of bed. He leaned to help Jamie up, "Just...come shower vith me. Take it easy."
"You're amazing man..." sighed Jamie. Ow. Ow. He was sore as fuck. But satisfied. More satisfied than he'd ever imagined he'd be.
"So are you," Cesaro replied, helping the smaller man and road agent into the bathroom.
They took a shower together, Cesaro playing the true gent, washing Jamie down and making him coffee (the coffee he took on the road with him, not the crappy complementary hotel room muck) before taking him to breakfast as they still had time before checkout.
"I mean it," Jamie said, breaking the silence as they read the breakfast menus, "I'd love to see you again."
"You see me at verk."
"I mean..."
"Don't vant people getting the wrong idea. You haff a wife und kids."
Paige was sat with Summer in the local Starbucks. They weren't filming for Total Divas at the moment and the finale was due to air this weekend. She was tapping her phone, group-texting her boys for a coffee date before Finn left for Ohio.
"How about I be the After Total Divas guest, save the boys scrapping?" she suggested.
"Perfect!" Summer grinned, "Though I think we should make Renee sit between us."
"Yes. We should. Keep things PG," smirked the young raven haired girl. They were alone. She leaned in and openly began to make out with the taller blonde.
"AHEM... No necking in coffee shops. There are children and sensitive homos present."
THe two girls flew apart to see a grinning Cody.
"You..." Paige lobbed her coffee stirrer at him, "Surprised Eden let you off the lead."
"I am buying her dinner later so it was a deal hehehehe. Curtis can't make it today, apparently The Ryback was a little...rough and he's sore...Dean's already on the plane."
"So it's just you..." Summer smirked, "Mr Gooseberry."
Two lattes were placed on the table and a handsome Irishman flopped next to Cody.
"Heyy..." beamed Finn.
"No Wade? You really know how to not make the most of your time on the road," Summer teased.
"I've been up since four actually," Finn smirked, "Stuart gave me an earth shattering orgasm AND ordered me a champers breakfast. So there."
"So where's 'Stuart' now then? Nursing a broken pelvis?" Paige teased.
"Bitch. Actually he's on the early flight. Mine's not till late and then I got your group text, knocked Coddles' door and here I am."
"Why do I get the feeling you two are up to something?" Summer said.
"We are perfectly behaved boys," smirked Finn.
Paige snorted.
"Where's Sasha anyway? Thought she'd have come along."
"I rung her...she's on an early flight to. Everyone's abandoned me," pouted Finn, browsing his phone, "Hey. Rude. The Swiss Thot blocked me!"
"Me too," Cody said after checking on both his accounts.
"I think I preferred it when you were like a pair of little kids," Summer said, "What's with all the Cesaro hate?"
"Because Cesaro wants to break up NAttie and TJ's marriage because he can't keep it in his pants," Cody spat, "He's a trainwreck. Just like Miz. Blech."
"He's too basic to be a trainwreck. Just leave it at mess," Finn chimed in.
Paige was just smiling. It was like having two naughty children in their charge. She'll take responsibility if anything kicked off at the live event but for now...awwwww.
"So Regina and Gretchen," Summer teased, "TOday is Wednesday. I see no pink. You letdowns."
Cody unzipped his hoodie to reveal one of his favoured Lacoste polos, in shocking pink.
Finn did the same to show a pastel pink Superman tee.
"Yaassss," Summer smirked, "So what you two up to?"
"Yeah, spill," PAige commanded.
"Nothing!" Finn's eyes were glinting with mischeif that showcased his lie.
"Let me guess, Little Cody somehow managed to blag his way to NXT Ohio so then you two and Samuel can run riot and make everyone's life hell without me there to slap your arses?" Paige stated.
"Damnit, you're too good," COdy pouted, "I already asked Dad who squared it with Hunter. The Ryback and SHow are going as well. Curtis can't and he's salty bout it."
"If any word of trouble gets back to me..." Paige wagged her finger at him.
"I'll look after him, I am the oldest," Finn grinned.
"A likely story," giggled Summer.
"So who's our first target?" hissed Cody.
"Zamboni," Finn grinned.
"Oh no..." Paige was burying her head in her hands. She could already picture the hot mess that was going to go down out there. She got the feeling that with these two forming quite the alliance, the WWE and NXT were going to have their hands full. But hey, Sasha would be there to keep an eye. She hoped. Ha.
Sami would be no use. He'll join in. And Adrian was too much of a scaredy-cat to man up and tell them to stop.
"Haven't you done enough for the whole Zahra-Seth mess?"Summer asked, "Miz and the laxatives incidents?"
"Zero Skankber has gotten off scot-free thus far," Cody scowled, "She thinks she can poke her green model ass into my friends' business? Uh-uh bitch. You messed with the wrong boys."
"Dean might not want that crap started again," Paige warned him.
"Oh Seth was innocent as Dean was," Cody smirked, "Zucchini Zero Zamboni is overdue a major dragging."
"We upset the Strongest Basic in WWE so that little cow is a piece of piss," Finn said, "I already got Becky to work her stiff as fuck in training yesterday."
"And you trained Becky so that should be good," Cody giggled.
"Boys...just...be careful," Paige warned, "Not that I wouldn't love to see that tattooed slapper scalped from one end of the PC to the other but she might get her new besties Little Miss Bitchface, Whorey Corey and Fat Miz to fuck shit up for us over here too."
"And isn't JoJo her new best friend as well?" Summer added.
"Hey! You're supposed to be on my side!" Paige pouted at her.
"Ah JoJo. I liked her once," Cody said, sipping his latte a-la the 'None Of My Business'/Madonna 'reductive' memes.
"So when you flying out?" asked SUmmer.
"After the live event," Cody said, "Yo Finn, Bluetooth or AirDrop me Sami's screengrabs of Shitsaro's shady tweets."
Finn started tapping on his phone and did just that.
"So let me guess, your flight's tonight too?" Paige smirked.
"Damnit," chuckled Finn, "I'm obviously that easy to read."
Backstage at the Live Event that day, Cesaro was sat in Catering with some coffee and a sandwich, awaiting Tyson and Nattie. Thankfully he didn't have to offer Jamie Noble a ride here. What had he acheived by screwing the ex-cruiserweight and road agent? What if Jamie turned Zack Ryder on his ass?
And how long before this got back to Sheamus?
Cesaro might have gotten revenge on his supposed 'amour' for daring to spend money on the DeLorean instead of him but he bet his life that Sheamus wouldn't just take this bombshell lying down. Wow.
Cesaro almost fell off his seat as the thought smacked him square between the eyes.
He had become Miz.
He must have absobed Mike's self-serving, hump-and-dump toxicity without realising. Or his self-esteem must have been so shot to pieces during his relationship with The Moneymaker that when it rebuilt, it took on the form of Mike. After all he'd been pretty demanding with Sheamus once the furious fires of their fling had settled into a steady smoulder.
And did banging Noble quell his desires for Tyson Kidd?
Nope.
In fact they'd only increased. He'd gotten Noble to unlock forbidden urges by sweet-talking and using his chic Euro charm. And Noble was married WITH KIDS.
Kidd would be easy as pie to sweet talk. But how could he get rid of Natalya for a while in order to do so?
Wow.
What the hell had happened to him?
It was like he'd become his own evil twin.
Maybe he'd snapped after the merciless way Finn and Cody tore him apart yesterday. He was already dreading tomorrow in Ohio. NXT Experience. More Finn. And Zayn too. Ick. At least he could tag along with Ryback and Big Show.
A scent of classy perfume filled the air as two shadows fell across the table.
Tyson and Nattie had arrived.
"Afternoon," the beautiful blonde greeted him, setting her expensive Louis Vuitton purse on the table and removing her Dior shades. She was such a label queen but Cesaro had to admit his 'rival' was probably the best-dressed female in WWE.
"Hey man," Tyson sank beside him. Damn his cologne was good.
"Hey, good trip?" Cesaro replied.
"Cut the crap man," Tyson snapped, "Noble. What the fuck."
"We've been through this," sighed Nattie, "TJ, it;s his business. We even said this last night!"
"You said you didn't care," Cesaro hissed at the Canadian.
"I've had all night to think about this," Tyson spat, "I want the truth Castignioli. Did we get the tag titles because you've been screwing Noble?!"
"TJ..." Nattie sighed, facepalming.
"No," Cesaro said firmly.
"I believe you," Tyson deadpanned, in a tone that suggested anything but.
"You two need to talk this one out," Nattie said, "I think Nicole's arrived. I'll go see her to give you two some space."
She got to her feet and left to find Nikki.
"So now you can cut the BS," Tyson hissed, "I thought you were legit, not shady. I did not bust my ass open in NXT just to get a title not because of the work, but because the road agent enjoys your dick. Still, makes a change from people who suck cock to get the spot, huh?"
Cesaro loved Tyson's dickishness. He'd soon fuck that attitude right out of that hottie. Mmmm. He'd have Tyson begging him for more. Sneaking behind his wife's back. Holding Tyson close as they had sweaty, passionate sex...Cesaro was firmly feeling alpha now.
And if Tyson got too mouthy, he;'d bend the Hart dungeon graduate over and spank that pert bubble ass hard.
"Try it sometime, might stop you being so mouthy." he mumbled.
"What was that?"
"Oh. Nothing." Cesaro shot him a smirk.
Tyson shook his head. He really didn';t get the Swiss sometimes but he did not want to jeopardise their good working relationship or this tag title push. Cesaro was a fucking A1 worker in the squared circle. Maybe Tyson should just heed Nattie's advice and not get so uptight about the gay and gossip stuff.
But why was Cesaro muttering shit at him?
"No go on," spat Tyson, "If you've got a problem with me. Come out and say it."
"I wouldn't call vot I haff vith you a problem," Cesaro's lip curled.
"Oh then what would you call it?"
Cesaro did not give a fuck. He got right in the Canadian's space.
Tyson backed off, horrified.
"Get the fuck out my face. Or you and I WILL fall out!"
"What you running from TJ? Scared you might be attracted to me?"
"You're so full of shit man. Seriously. Stop it. Now."
"I see the way you look at me in matches ven you think Natalya isn;t looking."
"Do you want us to fall out?"
"Maybe fall into bed."
Cesaro felt at his point he had sod-all left to lose. He'll find a way into this hot Canadian's bed somehow.
Tyson got to his feet, furious and not to mention uncomfortable. This shit was fucked up. Was Cesaro really like this? He swore he'd read the guy wrong. No wonder they were so reluctant to allow gay marriage when so many gay guys were literally after anything in pants, be they straight, married, parents or whatever.
"I'll see you in the ring!" He snapped, "You better get your act together by then. Or I'm going to Carrano."
"See you later," Cesaro sounded totally unabashed by Tyson's anger. He shamelessly checked out that ass as the Canadian stormed off.
NXT Experience, Cleveland, OH.
Cody Rhodes AKA Stardust was hanging around the back of the Agora Theatre in Cleveland, where the NXT show was playing later. It was so weird coming to Ohio and to an NXT show rather than the usual Florida. And coming to NXT and not to see Josh. But it was almost eight months removed from his boyfriend's leaving and transfer to TNA now. He'd packed his full costume and paints in case he was required to appear. You never know.
The door opened and Cody fished out his ID ready in case it was an overzealous member of event security.
But he was faced with the tall, jock figure of his longtime friend and old OVW colleague Tye Dillinger, AKA SHawn Spears.
"Shawn!" he cried, hugging his old friend.
"Hey man, I heard you were coming up. Wow, long time no see. Hows the wife, man?"
"She's cool."
"And how's the husband?"
"Amazing. Called him the entire drive here...almost an hour. Hehehehe."
"Bless ya. So what you doing here man? Kidd and Cesaro have showed up. The Ryback and Show have too."
"Not working. I'm a backstage guest."
"Who of? Oh...course, Balor and Zayn. The three amigas."
"Amigos, Shawn. We all have dicks."
"Smartass. Hey man, what's the deal with you and Devitt? Something I should know?"
Huh?!
Cody frowned.
Was he not allowed to make new friends these days without someone assuming he had an ulterior motive? He expected better of Dillinger.
"We are FRIENDs, Shawn. I am not the ho from OVW anymore."
"Whoa man, sorry," Tye threw his hands up in defence, "Just...I know what you're like."
"I WAS like..." corrected Cody.
"I meant, with Josh being at the Other Promotion...and Phillips. You were his new best buddy for like a month and now you barely talk to him. What was the deal?"
"I got wasted and made out with him..."
Cody avoided his old friend's glower.
Tye rolled his eyes.
"Why?" he snapped.
"I was lonely! Joshy and I fell out!"
"So you went after a young announcer to replace him. You turned into a chickenhawk, man."
"Stop using gay lingo Shawn. It's unbecoming."
"I think I've every right to. After all, we are more than buddies."
"We slept together once Shawn. In like 2006."
"You might think of it as a throwaway encounter man but I don't. I took a piece of you that night."
"Shawn..." sighed Cody, "There is nothing going on between myself and Finn other than a shared love of comics and dragging basic bitches on the roster."
"Oh God, tell me you haven;t started that Mean Girls crap again? Suppose for your next trick you'll pull a Burn Book out your catsuit."
"The Slam Book was, and always will be, mine and Joshy's thing. Finn invited me to join him and Sami out here so I did. Plus it's good tohang out with the developmental guys. Stars of the future. Plus I get to see you."
Tye chuckled.
"Good save man. Why don;t you come on in."
Cody followed his old chum inside as Tye gave him a quick tour of where everywhere was. Catering, locker rooms, the ring; the pair reminiscing about OVW times.
"So where's Sami and Finn?" he asked.
"Ring. OK man, well it's awesome to see ya. I'll maybe catch ya after the show?"
"Awesome. Laters."
They fist bumped and Cody headed out towards the ring.
Sasha Banks' sassy R&B theme was playing and Cody was greeted with possibly the most hilarious thing he was going to see thus far.
Finn Balor was dressed in his ring gear (plus Sasha's jacket and her shades) and was copying her entrance.
"More sass!" Sasha was saying, "Yas boy! Work that shit!"
Sami Zayn was filming the whole thing on his phone and howling with laughter.
Cody decided to do the same.
But then Sami spotted him.
"Oh HEY WADE!" he shouted, a wicked grin on his cute face.
Finn froze. He went bright red and ripped the shades off.
"You ARSEHOLE.." he scowled when he realised that Sami was pulling his leg. Sasha was in fits of giggles close by. Finn couldn't get the jacket off quick enough. He wasn't wearing his own merch tee but a 'Legit Boss' one.
"Werk it gurl," Cody smirked.
"If that ends up on Youtube Generico you're getting a Coup De Grace in running shoes," pouted Finn.
"Better be nice to me then, Fergal, or Wade may just see this," giggled Sami, wandering over to hug Cody.
"As usual Finny you slay me," Sasha said, picking up her discarded entrance clothing, "I would pay a months's paycheck to watch you do my entrance at the show tonight."
"And give the Swiss Thot a chink in my armour? No ta" Finn scowled, padding over to Cody to also hug him.
"He'd just be jealous cos he could never," grinned Cody, "Heard he's here. With Tyson."
"Yes I know. Sliming all over him and it's making me sick," scowled Finn, but then his face lit up with the naughtiest grin, "However. I have a plan."
Sami rolled his eyes. Much like an exasperated parent.
"Oooh what?" asked Cody.
"Fergal, stop...you should be concentrating on your match," Sami sighed.
"What happened to you?" pouted Finn, "Just cos you're out with injury doesn't mean you can stop being fun!"
"I am under strict orders from Saraya," Sami said, "To keep an eye on you two. Cos if you two act up, she's gonna tell the trainers about the anal bleaching incident. So do this for me. Please?"
"EW!" squealed Sasha.
"Ben appreciated it," pouted Sami.
"Adrian probably can't tell the difference," Cody grinned, slapping Sami on the back, "Aww, Momma Paige has got your balls in a vice. Me on the other hand, I'm a free spirit."
He heaved the shorter Finn up and spun him around.
"Awwwwwww...scalp me later but you two would be an adorable couple!" Sasha gushed.
"Ew no way," Cody said, "He drinks Guinness."
"And he drinks JD so no fucking WAY mate," smirked Finn, "Sorry Codes. You may pack heat but you're not and never will be Stuart."
"Watch your bloody mouth, I'm a bare knuckle fighter from Preston," Cody said in a truly dreadful impression of Wade. Normally he was good at impressions (his John Laurinaitis was legendary amongst the main roster) but he could never 'do' Wade.
"I'd ship it," smirked Sami.
Both Finn and Cody flipped him off.
"So bitch. What's this big plan?" asked Cody, pulling open a steel chair and perching on it.
"Look what I found," Finn said, reaching into a carrier bag on a nearby table and pulling out a small round box that looked like a disposable pepper seller.
"Pepper?" Cody raised his immaculate eyebrows.
Sami snorted. Part of him wanted to disapprove of this scheme. But the rest of him found it hysterical.
"Itching powder," Finn said.
"Surprise me?"
Finn reached into the bag and pulled out some blue wrestling trunks. Some very familiar ones.
Cesaro's.
Oh God.
Cody was starting to wonder if he was just a teensy bit out his depth. He looked at Sami who just shrugged.
"I also nicked his underoos," Finn grinned, "Dusted the hairs out obviously. Yuck. So a little bit in here..."
He pulled out a skimpy pair of black sports briefs and liberally dusted them with the powder. Before doing the same with the trunks. He positively coated them.
"Itching powder. Arse hair. One very uncomfortable opponent," he smirked, "And I'll work him hard so he can't scratch. Hehehehe."
"Fergal you're a very naughty boy," Sami attempted to scold him.
"Just remember the dick who muscled in when you and Pac had that breakup and then tlaked you into degrading yourself on webcam," snarled Finn, "And remember the cunt who fucked you and then chucked you out."
"OK but Claudio's changed..."
"Leopards never change their spots, and a slapper never changes her knickers," Finn spat, before grinning nastily once more, "Though he might want to after this."
"Finny..." sighed Sasha, before turning to Cody, "I did try and talk him out of it."
"Are you kidding? This is gold," Cody beamed, "And it'll keep him away from Tyson. Is Nattie with them?"
"D'ah," Sasha chimed in.
"Poor CesarHo. Itchy balls and having to look at what he can;t have. What a shame."
"And not a word to Paige," Finn grinned conspiratorially, "So Codes. You in or out?"
"What will happen if I'm out?" asked Cody.
"Then I'll tell Josh next time you're in Tennessee that you've got the squits."
"KHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE." A major Stardust hiss.
"Really Fergal? Really?" Sami teased, "That's the best you can threaten him with?"
"You sound like Big Fat Mess," pouted Cody.
Sasha was on her phone, writing on her Tumblr.
"What ya doing?" asked Finn, perching next to her and reading over her shoulder, "HEY! Delete that NOW. Finnodes isn't even a WORD, Merc."
"I'm sorry, I'm going to hell but I am shipping the hell out of you two, right now, you give me so much life," Sasha giggled, "And plus I am one of those Tumblr girls y'all hate."
"Generico. My phone, please."
Sami tossed his bestie his phone.
Finn was grinning wickedly as he searched his camera roll. For some decidedly X-rated shots of him and Wade.
One particular one got his blood boiling every time. He was bent over on a hotel bed in front of a mirror, Wade inside him, all sweat-sheened and ripped muscles. Mmmm. Manliness. British beef. Finn was getting hard already. Next to his female BFF. What a mess he was. Did he care. Nope.
He sent it to Sasha.
"Put THAT on your Tumblr, Merc. You'll break the internet."
"FINN!" screamed Sasha, going scarlet, "Oh my God MY EYES!"
"What is it? Gimme?" Sami swooped in like a falcon and snatched Sasha's phone, "Oh FERGAL, get it boyo. Take it like a man."
"I sprayed the bed that night," smirked Finn, "Gushed so hard you could hear it shoot out'o'me."
Sasha almost passed out.
Even Cody winced. Cody. He who LOVED telling all and sundry blow-by-blow encounters about his sex life.
"My phone!" Sasha squeaked, "Sami. Delete it! PLEASE! At once!"
"Why? Fergal looks hot as fuck on the end of Wade's dick," Sami giggled, "And Wade's ab game is STRONG as fuck. Obviously has to work hard to sate his thirsty ass. Damnit I want to heal up."
"Awww, you'll be getting pounded again by Mighty Mouse soon Generico," teased Finn.
"FERGAL." growled Sami.
He deleted the indecent photo from Sasha's phone before handing it back to the NXT Women's Champion.
Finn stretched comfortably out on the lino floor of the deserted arena, crossing one ripped leg over another.
He was hot and he knew it.
He had it all right now. The most over guy in NXT; a great and solid bunch of new and old friends; and to top it off, the hottest Brit in the world in his bed (and hopefully forever). Nothing could spoil his mood.
"You're getting too big for your sparkly red boots Fergal Devitt," scolded Sami.
"What's the matter Generico? Am I a handful?" Finn sucked his thumb, a naughty grin on his handsome face.
"Just thought you might want to act your age," Sami wagged his finger at him, "As you're 34 this year."
"Only as young as you feel?" Finn hit back.
"Good boy Finny," Sasha chimed in, "You're too cute and I love ya."
"He's getting cocky cos he's getting British dick more than me," pouted Sami, "You wait, bitch. When I'm healed Ben and I will make you and Barrett look like a pair of old men. Which you are anyway."
Sami finished his point with a loud and theatrical RAZZZZZZZZZZZP!
"HEY! That's MY thing!" pouted Cody.
"Guess we;'ve been around you too long," smirked Sami, "That'll teach him to shade Ben's looks."
"And less of the old SAMUEL," Cody scowled, "Joshy is the same age as Wade and FInn."
"Outvoted again Generico, fancy," grinned Finn, climbing onto Cody's lap.
"Gerroff," complained Cody, "I'm not Barrett."
"Fergal, is there something you're not telling me?" Sami asked, perching next to them.
Finn promptly crawled onto Sami's lap instead, Cody dusting himself down and muttering like a disgruntled kid
"What's that Generico?" he smirked, "Oh man, you're so bony. Put some meat on your bones."
He made himself comfy, resting his feet on Cody's legs, trapping them both in. Even though at 190 he was the lightest of the mischievous trio (as well as the eldest AND the shortest).
"Awwwwwwwww you boys are so adorable," cooed Sasha, "I want to take you all home with me and buy you candy and talk about boys all night."
She took a photo for Instagram.
Two more men walked in. Kevin Owens and Adrian Neville.
Sami practically turned into the heart-eyes emoji in a split-second at the sight of his beloved Geordie. He tried to get up but Finn was strong.
"Gerroff me Fergal," he complained.
"Nope. Comfy. You can suffer like me."
"Grown men sitting on each other's laps. Welcome to wrasslin," deadpanned Kevin, pulling up a steel chair and resting his title beside his feet.
Adrian pulled one up beside him.
"Alright pal," he nodded to Cody.
"Oh. Hey Rhodes," Kevin did the same, "Didn't know you were here."
"I've been invited as a guest," Cody grinned.
"Oh Pac, glad you could show up," Finn said, "You couldn't do us a huge favour could you lad?"
"Sure mate, what?"
"Cesaro left his ring gear behind, couldn't take it to him couldya?"
He'd dropped the campness from his heavenly Irish burr and sounded more manly and laddish in the presence of Adrian and Kevin but he was still lounging across Sami and Cody. It made for a rather bizarre sight and Kevin was a touch out of his depth. And something about that smirk on Balor's face signified fuckery ahead.
"Sure mate," Adrian got to his feet and headed over to the table where the carrier bag was, not spotting the box of itching powder.
But as he walked by..
"BEN!"
Sami's deafening bark brought deadly silence.
"Oh...sorry...hi Rami." A blushing Adrian stopped to peck the redhead's lips.
Kevin was facepalming. Oh dear. But work would be boring as fuck without Sami and his friends.
Especially now that asshole DeMott had been given the boot.
"Do as Fergal says, take Claudio his clothes," Sami said firmly.
"Yes dear," sighed Adrian and walked out with the bag.
"You've got him whipped," remarked Kevin.
"Men must always know their place, I'm sure your wife understands," Sami folded his arms in triumph.
"Well...oh by the way, what shit's going down with Breeze and Kenta?" asked Kevin, "Are they dating or something. Always together and lots of touchy-feely shit in their matches."
"Breeze is using Itami for sex and I am not down with that," Cody said.
"Oh but it's cute, CJ and Tyler had a very amiable breakup," Sami insisted, "No dragging of CJ's looks boys or I will fall out with both of you. They're still good buds."
"You nearly dumped Pac over making jokes about Parker," Kevin said incredulously.
"My amigos can get away with more," grinned Sami.
Cesaro was in AGONY.
He'd just defeated that bitch Balor in one hell of a match. The crowd had absolutely lapped it up. But he swore if he didn't get into an ice cold bath soon he'd pass out. This was the most uncomfortable he'd ever been. It was like he'd somehow fallen into poison ivy. He had to get this ring gear off. Fast.
"Man, are you alright?" asked Tyson, who'd put their recent spat to one side and was legit concerned for his tag partner.
"NO!" bellowed Cesaro in frustration, "I need...to get to a bathroom."
"Oh...bad shake?" asked Natalya.
"Not that kind of problem.,...it fucking...ITCHES...what did they make these fucking trunks from?!" raged Cesaro, "I can't be allergic!"
"Maybe it's the canvas?" asked Tyson, "Nat, you OK to go on ahead, I'll give him a hand."
Ha. Any other time Cesaro would have crawled across broken glass to be alone with the hot Canadian. But his skin between his legs was on fire right now. He was sure he washed these blue trunks. They weren't new.
"I need a cold bath or something.." he hissed.
"Look man, showers are just here."
"Ha. Aren't you scared I might pounce on you?" snarked the uncomfortable Swiss.
"You were pissed, I'll let it go," Tyson shrugged, "Here...in here."
He helped his tag partner into the showers and into a stall.
Cesaro was frantically ripping off his trunks, underwear, pads and boots, tossing them over the door and turning on the shower to the coldest setting.
He hissed as the icy streams hit his skin. He turned so the water would hit the affected parts of his body. The itch just wasn't subsiding. Oww. It was starting to get painful.
"Hey man, mind if I take a look?" asked Tyson, "No homo. I'm legit concerned for ya. If it's the canvas shouldn't we tell everyone who's working?"
Cesaro looked down at his hairy, long muscular legs.
Angry scarlet hives had erupted over where the trunks had been, thankfully his most important region seemed unscathed. But it was just as bad around the back.
If it was the canvas, surely his exposed body would have suffered.
Tyson was shaking his head.
Just as the door opened and Finn walked in, with Cody, naturally. Both bitchily wanting to see the results of the naughty Irishman's handiwork.
"Hey man, you guys knocked it out the ballpark," Tyson said.
"Cheers mate," Finn said, failing to mask the glinting in his eyes, "How's Cesaro bearing up?"
Cesaro heard that Irish accent and wanted to fucking die.
Hang on.
THe way Finn was talking...
THE FUCKER.
He'd done this. He'd put some sort of irritant in Cesaro's trunks!
"TJ, vould you mind leaving us alone," he snarled.
Tyson shook his head, failing to understand all this gay shit as usual and left the room.
Cody and Finn exchanged malicious sneers and kicked the bathroom door shut behind them. Cesaro had just dug his own grave by getting rid of Tyson. Cody went to stand by it as guard.
Finn kicked the door of the shower stall open.
Oh yes.
No escape now bitch.
And what a sight. THat sculpted, Adonis body was marred with furious red patches where the trunks had been. Cesaro was scratching his skin to ribbons in a desperate search for relief.
If the guy wasn't such a bitch and a messy slut, Finn wouldn't mind a ride of that dick. If he hadn't met Wade, that was.
He folded his black-banded arms.
"Well well well," he sneered, "You really thought you could get away with shading me and my good friend here on public social media? 'Body paint can't polish a turd' huh? 'Prince means asshole in pro wrestling'?"
"I am the Prince of Pro Wrestling," added Cody, "And I wear paint. Nice, real nice, CesarHo."
"You thought what happened last week was it? Honey, we haven't even started with a thot like you," sneered Finn as Cesaro backed his huge, six foot plus frame against the cool, tiled wall. OK now he was starting to legit fear for himself. What were they going to do to him?
He was half expecting Finn to pull a knife from his boot a-la Zack Ryder.
"You insulting my boyfriend was enough to make me hate you," Finn went on, cracking his knuckles, "However you decided to make this personal. I might have gotten bored with you once we stopped you from ruining Natalya and Kidd's perfectly happy marriage. But oh no. You crossed a line."
"Awwww just think Finn," Cody added, "He was *that* close to getting Tyson in the shower with him? Albeit with a rash. Ew. Maybe he caught that from some other low-rent ho he was porking?"
"Poor Sheamus, you've made such a mockery of a perfectly legit nice bloke," Finn continued, getting in Cesaro's face, "You hurt my fellow countryman."
He cracked his knuckles once more.
"Typical Irish thug," spat Cesaro, standing his ground, "And you stink of whiskey. Vere you working drunk?"
"National stereotypes, resorting to that are we?" Finn hissed, eyes flashing malevolently, "I don't take too kindly to that."
"Just keep digging you basic bitch," snarled Cody.
Cesaro switched the shower off. He kept a hand over his modesty and was determined to not let these two bitches intimidate him. But he had no towel. Or clothes.
"Get out my face you overrated leprechaun," he spat.
"You gonna let him talk to you like that?" Cody catcalled.
"No I am not," Finn spat and he calmly stuck out his leg, causing the naked, wet hunk of man to trip and fall gracelessly flat onto the unforgiving tiled floor. Much like Finn himself normally did when Wade was around before they started dating.
Both the bullies noted, with pleasure, the redness around that other-wise amazing, if hairy, muscular ass.
"Phone please," Finn smirked.
Cody tossed Finn his phone.
Finn took a photo.
"Now then," the Irishman finished, "Shade me online again, Basicaro, and this photo might just get leaked onto Twitter. Maybe even sold to TMZ. Got that?"
Cesaro just mumbled, the humiliation too much to bear. Once again these two nasty bitches had got the better of him. All because of him wanting to bed Tyson? As if they'd never had married dick in their time?
"Good boy," Finn slapped Cesaro's naked ass mockingly, "Ugh. Hairy. Gross."
With their catty giggles ringing in his ears, Cesaro thankfully heard the two Plastics depart.
"Stephen..." he whimpered uselessly into the tiles beneath him.
Outside the shower room, Finn and Cody were howling with laughter and high-fiving one another.
"Oh man, you are pure evil!" Cody giggled.
"Told ya I could give ya a run for yer money Regina," Finn replied.
"You are a baaaaad bitch Fergal Devitt and I fucking love ya for it!" Cody said, "You are SO Queen Bee of NXT."
"And don't you forget it," Finn said triumphantly, "Generico thinks he is, but I am."
"Me and you could rule the main roster with a rod of iron," Cody said wistfully.
"Providing we have the backing of Paige, Generico, and I suppose Ambrose and Axel are cool too. A queen is nothing without her loyal comrades."
"And Summer. And Sasha. Never forget," Cody said firmly, "Oh honey you should have stolen his trunks."
"No. Even I have to draw the line somewhere when it comes to homewrecking, boyfriend-hating thots," Finn said with pure distaste, "Speaking of which...Yo ZaWhora, why are you even here. You're barely cutting the mustard in training."
The skinny, inked figure of controversial NXT diva Zahra Schreiber was approaching, accompanied by ring announcer JoJo.
The stank faces both girls shot him mirrored only the one Finn himself shot them right back.
Cody folded his arms.
Zahra sniggered cattily.
"How's Ambrose, lispy?" she sneered.
"Sorry what was that Zucchini? I cannot hear you over how irrelevant you are," Cody said haughtily, refusing to even look at her.
"Thorry what wath that thucchini?" Zahra mimicked him to giggles from JoJo, "Thanks for spitting over the floor. Oh by the way Devitt, sucking main roster dick isn't gonna get you there."
"Well it certainly didn't work for you," Finn retorted, "You can lick Miz's fat arse all ya like, doesn't mean you'll get on TV soon."
"You think Becky Lynch frightens me? I enjoyed it, made me work harder!" Zahra hit back.
"Really? So why were you crying like the bitch you are?" Finn hissed, "Why don't you go see your pal Corey. Go and cry about your irrelevancy together."
"MAke the most cos you'll be gone post-mania," Cody added.
"You wish," sneered Zahra, "Come on, JoJo, let's find some real men. Preferably not faggots. I'm dying for some wrestler dick. Maybe Dillinger. He's HOT."
"MESSY WHORES!" screamed Cody as they retreated.
"We'll get her alone soon," Finn assured him, "Then we can really give her the scalping she deserves."
"She even touches Shawn I will snatch her fucking wig in front of Triple H!" Cody cried.
"C'mon, let's go get food. Refuel and then we can drag her arse so hard she'll beg for mercy, I was being ultra nice just now." Finn linked his arm in Cody's to lead him out to Catering.
Sat at a table was Sami and Becky Lynch with Sasha.
The two boys perched into their seats which had been saved.
"What was going on with Cesaro?" asked Becky, "Looked like major ants in his pants?"
Sami was shaking his head.
"Tell your student Fergal," he said sternly, "What you did. Show her what a great example you're setting."
"I put itching powder in his trunks," Finn grinned triumphantly, "It was just like the priest in the Magdalene Sisters, Bex."
Becky snorted and covered her mouth.
"You didn't? Oh my God..." she was giggling, "You can't make up some of the stuff that goes on here."
"Where have you been Fergal? And you, Codes?" Sami said, "Look, you're not helping the Boss's suspicions.
"Dragging the Swiss thot whilst he was scratching the life out of his sweaty hair ball bag," Finn said, "I have pictorial evidence too."
"No...m'fine, thanks," Sami said, blushing. After all, he'd slept with Cesaro once.
"And then we bumped into Zero," Cody said, "Who mocked my lisp."
"What a bitch!" Sami cried.
"Want me to break her some more in training tomorrow?" asked Becky.
"Hey I want a turn!" Sasha complained, rubbing her title, "As the champion."
"Oh no, we're gonna have some fun with her first," Finn said, "Aren't we, Codes?"
"Oh hell yeah," Cody said, "SHe dragged my lisp. Nobody does that and gets away with it. If she swipes at Dad or Dustin, or Brandi...I am tearing her fake weave out."
"Just don't go too far, keep the dragging and scalping with words," Sasha warned, "Guys hitting girls isn't cool unless it's an intergender match."
"Listen to the Boss, Fergal," Sami added.
"Scalping verbally is far more damaging anyway," Finn shrugged.
Des Moines, Iowa.
Raw landed firmly in the Mid-west this week, and Seth Rollins was happy to come home. He and Dean had come back a day early for some downtime in the briefcase-holder's native Davenport before heading onto the show. Despite Miz's best slimebag collaborations with shady new NXT Divas, their relationship was strong enough now to survive unscathed.
"Wish we could have come back earlier," Dean was saying as they rolled into Catering at the arena.
"I know," Seth sighed, "But we're top guys Jonny. We got yesterday. Can't sniff at that. It's Mania season."
"Wish we managed to head to NXT in Ohio. Heard lots of fuckery went down," Dean smirked, pulling out his laptop.
"Aw c'mon Jonny, haven't you trolled that blog enough?" sighed Seth, "It's been months. Can't you find a new hobby? Like graphic novel writing or something?"
"But it's fun," Dean pouted, "I'd love to see Tumblr blow up when they find out about Cesaro wrestling with trunks full of itching powder!"
Seth coughed and spat the Gatorade he was drinking through his nose. What the hell?!
"What?!" he spluttered.
"Oh did I not tell you? Codes went down there and he and Balor did some dragging on our behalf for that nasty little crackwhore Zahra," Dean said, "I heard they reduced her to tears and Becky Lynch almost snapped her in two."
"Jonny, we should move on from that shit," Seth sighed, "Drama doesn't solve anything. Don't want to lose our Mania matches do we?"
Dean got to his feet to load a plate with chicken wings before other greedy fuckers (read: Ryback) stole them all. He perched back down and began to dive in.
"So Cesaro? itching powder?" Seth's eyebrows were raised.
"Oh," Dean said thickly through a mouth full of chicken, "Balor had to wrestle him but before the match he put itching powder in his trunks. Apparently Cesaro's crotch was bright red. He and Balor man; it's out-and-out war."
"Don't go getting any ideas," Seth warned him. He spotted the glint in Dean's eyes and could see the seeds of thoughts germinating behind that tousled fringe. He was not going to be held responsible if any pranks happened with the loudmouthed Miz. Seth hated the Awesome One as much as his other half did for the callous Instagram stunt with Zahra but he wasn't about to sink to Miz's level. But hey. They could have let the stunt split them up.
"Me?" Dean said innocently, a little smile lifting his face and he looked like a mischievous kid, "What would I do?"
"You spiked Miz's coffee with ExLax...and pitched the Niagara thing," Seth smirked, "Just don't want you getting into trouble Jonny."
"Would I do that?"
"When my back's turned," Seth said as his phone buzzed. He checked it; "Jamie and Joey have just showed up. I'll see you later for production meeting. Be good."
He pecked Dean on the lips and got to his feet.
Over in the parking lot, Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury were signing in. Jamie was stalling and Joey was confused.
"What's up with you man?" asked Joey to his colleague.
"Nothing, nothing," the little Southerner said airily.
"You look like you've lost something?"
"Nope.."
Jamie was scanning the car park for Cesaro. He'd heard about the shit that went down in Ohio. Rhodes and Balor were pathetic as far as he was concerned. Grown men acting like grade schoolers. They were professionals. He expected better from a second-generation superstar and an experienced NJPW star. It was like they didn't give a fuck about respect for the business and just wanted to play around.
And, Jamie was getting the urges again. He had desperately tried to suppress them but he was craving forbidden attention from a hot European hunk of man. Cesaro had totally blown his mind. He wanted to tell someone about it. He'd watched gay porn in his hotel room last night. He said a prayer afterwards. But he couldn't help it.
He wanted another night with Cesaro.
Seth appeared in the doorway and greeted his on-screen stooges.
"What's with Noble?" asked Seth.
"Search me. Hey man. Snap out of it!" Joey clicked his fingers at his little associate.
"What...oh...sorry. Sup Rollins," grunted Jamie.
"Wanna go through some stuff?" Seth said.
"Can do," Joey said, handing Seth the script for tonight's show, "We';ve got some good stuff tonight."
"Can't it wait?" Jamie muttered as he spotted a car pull in. His heart raced as he saw NAtalya climb out, along with Kidd. Out of the back climbed Cesaro. He looked mutinous and angry.
"What's up with you?" Joey asked incredulously.
"Nothing," huffed Jamie, "Let's go in."
Seth and Joey walked inside. Jamie hung back, waiting until they were out of earshot.
Natalya spotted the little road agent/former cruiserweight/one half of J&J Security hanging around by the entrance. Oh dear. She hoped Tyson didn't see him. Tyson had a real bee in his bonnet about the revelation about Cesaro and Jamie. She was sure their title reign wasn't a result of that. She thought that E should just do Total Superstars; the amount of catty drama amongst the men could far outstrip much of the fabricated stuff for Total Divas!
"Oh WHAT?!" complained Tyson.
"What's the matter? Forgotten your Drebeats?" asked Nattie.
"No. I have them on my head Nat! What's that little creep doing there?" Tyson indicated Jamie.
Cesaro looked up, already trying to not look at the happy married couple in front of him, one half of which he was lusting after. He was not in a good mood. If Balor was here, blood will be shed. That little leprechaun was long overdue an ass-kicking. And if not, well Rhodes will regret ever knowing Cesaro.
And Nattie and Tyson were being unbelievably coupley today or so it seemed.
Cesaro's phone buzzed.
From: Mon Amour
Hey :) Maybe one more week and I'll be back xx
Cesaro snorted. Oh shit, he forgot he was still dating Sheamus.
He hastily modified the contact name back to just 'Sheamus'. Absence makes the heart grow fonder? Yeah right. Cesaro had gone right off of the red-haired Irishman the day he'd gone and bought that DeLorean. And now he'd lusted after another and cheated on him with yet another.
And how many weeks had they run the 'Sheamus Returns' vignettes?
He tapped a response.
To: Sheamus
Can't wait :) x
Cold? Not necessarily. Insincere? Maybe.
They all signed in.
And then Cesaro felt a small tap on his middle-back. He jumped and was faced with Jamie Noble.
Tyson made a disgusted noise and ushered NAttie inside.
"What do you want?" asked Cesaro, disgruntled.
"Hey," Jamie whispered.
"Can I help you Noble?"
"Heard about NXT Columbus, man you had it rough with the Plastics," Jamie said.
Cesaro scoffed and rolled his eyes. The agony. The humiliation. Thanks a bunch. He'd almost blocked that day out of his head.
"Let me guess, ze entire roster knows do they?" he spat.
"No...was only saying..." Jamie said.
"Well don't. Thank you."
Jamie gulped. Was he coming off as a pussy?
"I only wanted to know...if you were doing anything after the show?" he asked.
"Going to bed and then heading to Smackdown," Cesaro said in a condescending tone, stomping into the arena, already done with this conversation. Did the little hick not get the message that it was just a fuck? A fling. A one night stand. Go back to his damn wife already.
"Was wondering you fancied some company?" Jamie persisted, having to run to keep up with the tall Swiss' strides.
Cesaro stopped dead and rounded on the little pest.
"Nein! Non! No!" he snarled, "You were just a FUCK, Noble! We are not in a relationship! We had fun. Leave it at that!"
"Oh thanks a bunch!" cried Jamie, standing his ground, "I'm still a damn road agent you know! I still produce matches! I stuck my neck out for you! I listened to you when you were feeling like shit, man! Don't bite the fucking hand that fed you!"
"I've fucked better ass in my time," sneered the Swiss, "You didn't feed me anything."
OK maybe he was being just a tad nasty here. Jamie didn't ask to be dragged up in his issues like this.
"You used me you asshole!" Jamie yelled.
"Voice down!" Cesaro almost pleaded. He'd been struck by a horrible realisation. Rollins. If Rollins found out about this...he'd tell Ambrose. Who was of course a PLASTIC.
The Plastics told each other everything. And then once Rhodes got wind...
He sank to the floor in horror, head in his hands.
Jamie was shocked to see the tough Swiss crumble.
He kneeled down next to him, rubbing the huge back.
"What's the matter?" he asked.
"Have you told Rollins?" mumbled Cesaro.
"No. Why?"
"No reason," the relief seeping from every pore in the Swiss' face was palpable as he got back to his feet. He gave Jamie a half-hug as an apologetic gesture for his asshole behaviour just now.
Jamie wriggled closer, standing on his tiptoes, his breath cool and minty on Cesaro's face.
"We can't," the Swiss sighed, "You shouldn't."
"I want it," Jamie breathed, "I've been thinking about you a lot.."
"You just had a new experience," Cesaro said gently, "Don't overthink it."
He gave Jamie an amiable smile before setting on his way. But the small man started to follow him.
"You don't understand!" Jamie was saying, "I can't stop thinking about you Claudio! You were so good to me!"
Oh jeez.
Enough already.
Joey and Seth had just left the locker room and had been on their way to find Jamie when they stopped dead.
Just as Jamie made to grab Cesaro's arm.
Cesaro froze solid as he caught sight of them.
No.
No.
No.
NO!
Please.
Was this a nightmare right now?
"What the hell..." Seth was gobsmacked.
"Jamie!" barked Joey.
Jamie saw them too and went scarlet.
He let go of Cesaro's arm and scuttled away towards his colleagues.
"Where you been man?" asked Joey.
"Just had to talk some stuff through with Cesaro, I'm putting their match together," grunted Jamie.
"Well c'mon man, we've got to start setting up!" Joey said.
"FINE!" bellowed Jamie in frustration.
"We'll see you in a while ROllins," Joey said.
"Just a minute. Cesaro. Why were you grabbing his arm?" asked Seth.
"None of your business!"
"You are not into dudes Noble, you're married!" Seth stated.
"Wait what do you mean 'into dudes'? Jamie man what the hell have you been playing at?!" cried Joey.
Jamie was cornered like a rat. He had no choice but to tell them. Relationships between talent and staff were banned in this company. Hopefully they won't rat him out to Hayes, Dunn or worse, McMahon or Triple H.
"You can't go fucking talent!" Joey seethed, "You'll lose your job!"
"Technically, we're talent as we appear on TV," Jamie corrected him.
"So you're not denying it!" Seth asked, "Aw jeez man, why? Is that why he and Kidd have the titles now?"
"NO!" snapped Jamie, "It was...only the once. OK, twice."
Both Joey and Seth facepalmed.
"Was it...good?" asked Joey.
Jamie's jaw dropped. OK that wasn't the question he'd been expecting. Somewhat of a relief. At least he knew Joey had his back and wouldn't grass him out.
"Yes...it was," he admitted, cheeks rather pink, "Best sex in years."
"Look," Joey said, resting a hand on his colleague's shoulder, "It's none of my business, we both know what happens on the road, stays on the road, right? Not my sort of thing but if it turns you on...anyway..."
"Am I the only one who thinks this is shit is wack?!" Seth exclaimed, "You're MARRIED, Noble."
"So's Miz. So's the Alpha Bitch Rhodes," pouted Jamie, "Means nothing in this company."
"OK that was un-necessary," Joey said, "Don't shit on your homelife man."
"Wasn't," Jamie said, "Was just saying that he can't use that as a stick to beat me with when you've got jokes like Miz and Rhodes in fake-ass marriages. I just got curious...and enjoyed it...won';t happen again...so...matches?"
Seth rolled his eyes and stormed off back to Catering.
Where was Dean?
He had to level with someone here.
This was fucked-up shit. Was this a wrestling company or a gay hookup agency? Jeez. Maybe it was all the testosterone in the air. Partly why he'd been so stung by Dean's sleeping around during their nasty breakup period.
Dean wasn't in the seat from earlier.
But Seth didn't take long to spot him.
At a table with Axel, Paige and naturally, Rhodes.
He wandered over.
"Scuse me," he cleared his throat.
"Oh hey Seth," Cody waved adorably, "Want to join? Dean can sit on your lap?"
"M'fine thanks man, er...Jonny, can we talk?"
"What's up?" Dean looked very concerned. He was still a touch paranoid even though things between them nowadays were great. He got to his feet and walked to his beau. Seth looked faintly nauseous.
"Is it OK if we go somewhere more private?" asked Seth.
Now Dean was worried. He nodded and followed Seth out of the room. Cody's icy glare following them.
"Hey, lighten up baldy, it's probably not a dumping," Paige said.
"It better not be," Cody hissed, "It would destroy Dean."
"But they've got nothing wrong between them?" Curtis put in.
"Well," Paige gave Cody a stern look, "If somebody didn't let bad-uns like Finn twist their arms into going to NXT and scalping Zucchini strand by strand..."
"You shouldn't have done that," Curtis said, "Even Zayn thought you and him went too far."
"She should have stood up to us. We were only testing how tough she is for the business," Cody pouted.
"Oh come on baldy at least think up a believable cover story!" Paige giggled, "Not that it wasn't hilarious and deserved, it's just...well she's got friends on the main roster."
"Seth won't dump Dean over that surely?" Cody went white. He did wonder if he and Finn had gone too far. Finn was so...influential.
"All we have to do is wait and see when he comes back..." Paige sighed.
In a side room, Dean was perched on a steel chair as Seth paced the floor. The Cincinnati native was now fearing the worst.
"Please Colby..." he almost pleaded.
"You won't believe what I just saw," Seth sighed, pushing his long hair out of his face.
Dean almost collapsed with relief. He had been so convinced he was about to get dumped over the Zahra-dragging.
"What?"
"Noble has been fucking Cesaro."
"WHAT?!" Dean's jaw could have hit the floor.
"No kidding, he told us himself," Seth said, "THis company is twisted man. Is Cesaro screwing everyone...and you call Miz the ratchet skank..."
"Or me..." Dean deadpanned, "Noble's straight isn't he?"
"Apparently he got bicurious and freaked Cesaro who's supposed to be dating Sheamus...aw man what's with this company?!" Seth spluttered, "Am I the only one who's not looked at anyone but the guy I'm dating since I got called up?"
"Not everyone's like you," Dean whispered, "I know I'm not."
"Aw...shit sorry Jonny...that was fucking tactless," Seth huffed, mentally kicking himself, "But you...wouldn't cheat on me...right?"
"No!" cried Dean, "How dare you!"
"Sorry...I'm just gonna shut up..."
"Hey," Dean hugged his beau close, "You've got nothing to worry about. I love you Colby. Always will. All the shit from last year...ancient history. I'm not gonna let bitter fuckwits like Miz try and come between us just because he's jealous he can't keep a man. Just...stay out of the gossip stuff..."
"You can talk," Seth said, a small smile on his face.
"And you have just given me some steaming hot, sweet tea to spill," grinned Dean, planting a huge fat kiss on Seth's lips, "I love you!"
"Love you too..." Seth replied.
"Now I need to go spill this tea while it's hot," Dean said, "See you later!"
He sprinted from the side room and back to the table.
He was grinning from ear to ear.
"Hey Dean...what happened?" asked Curtis.
"OMIGOD HAS SETH PROPOSED?!" squealed Cody.
"Don't tempt fate," Dean said coyly, "No...he has just given me some beautiful sweet tea."
"Oooh..." Cody placed his Off Duty Glasses on in a flash, "Spill. Immediately.
"Calm down," scolded Paige.
"You are gonna just DIE," Dean smirked, "Guess who Cesaro has been cheating on Sheamus with."
"IF HE'S SPLIT UP NATTIE AND TYSON SO HELP ME GOD..." screamed Cody.
"It's not Kidd," Dean said.
"Wait WHAT?!" Now Paige was on her feet.
"Dear, dear," chuckled Curtis, "Cesaro really doesn't help himself. Shame talent and hot looks don't equal common sense."
"C'mon Dean, SPILL," Cody grabbed Dean's arm.
Dean leaned forward conspiratorially.
"You'll never guess."
"For the love of God Brando just tell us!" squeaked Paige.
"OK. I'll give you a clue."
Cries of protest.
"Fine fine! Noble."
A stunned silence as the Plastics processed this information.
"Wow," Curtis breathed, "I mean, Noble's cute and all that..."
"He probably has to have a child's bus fare! No thank you!" Paige said.
"You like them tall anyway," grinned Dean, "Tall hot blondes."
"Quiet you," PAige's cheeks were pink, "Coddles? Cody? You OK love?"
Cody was rigid. Breathing furiously through his nose. Cesaro was a dirty self-serving love rat! Screwing a road agent?! So much for pure talent and charisma netting him and Kidd the titles!
"Gross. MESS. DISGUSTING..." he was snarling.
He leapt to his feet.
"Where you going?" asked Dean.
"To scalp that Swiss whore bitch," snapped Cody.
"I think you've done more than enough," Paige wrestled him down, "If you really hate him that much..."
"Sluts are the lowest form of life," growled Cody, the veins popping in his thick muscular arms as he gripped the table fiercely.
"What she means is," Curtis appeased, "Let Superman dig his own grave. Give him enough rope and he'll hang himself."
"Imagine," Cody was hissing, "If you were Noble's kids...and you found out Daddy was getting his back doors smashed in by a guy at work..."
"I've lost count of the married men I've had over the years," Dean shrugged, "We all know how many of them have a wife and kids at home but they crave dick or male ass."
Cody sighed heavily.
What use was it him getting wound up?
And, the main thing...Tyson was safe. As far as he knew.
"I think he did it to make a point to Tyson and Nattie," Paige suggested.
"And I bet," Dean added, "He's still after Kidd. Noble was just a guinea pig to see if he could break in a straight. And he did."
"You know way too much about that stuff," Curtis said.
"I've been an 'other woman' before," Dean shrugged, "One trick on the indies wanted to leave his wife of 20 years and teenage sons for me. Told him where to get off."
"KKKKKHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
An epic Stardust hiss.
Only way Cody could truly release his disgust.
And tell Finn.
He opened his iPad and dialled Finn on FaceTime.
"You stay right here with that young man," scolded Paige.
The cute Irishman's handsome face appeared on the screen.
"Haaay Codes," he beamed, waving.
"Oh heeey Stardust," came another Irish accent and the Gaelic and ethereal features of the auburn-haired Becky Lynch came into view.
Cody waved adorably at them before rotating the iPad around so the others could say hello.
"No Samuel?" Paige chimed in.
"Nope. Irish only tonight...St Paddy's Day remember?" Finn said, "I hope you're all going out after Raw to have Guinness."
"Might do. Hehehehehe." Cody was the picture of cute little-kid-mischeif, "I have some HOT tea. Freshly poured via Dean and his former two toned hot man. Hehehehe."
"Ooooh..." Now Finn was grinning even more.
"Please not more Zahra stuff, I'm not sure I can go on beating her no-good arse," Becky smirked.
"Did you give your trainer a good spanking for Itching Powder-gate?" Paige added.
"Oh yes," giggled Becky.
"You were laughing an'all bitch," pouted Finn.
"Guess who this tea's on?" Cody giggled, "Our favourite dragging target. The Swiss thot."
"What now?" Finn smirked, "Stuart hasn't updated me on anything. He was merciless at the weekend. Hehehehehe. Spanked me with his belt. Then went in with no lube. I had to sit on an ice pack for a whole day. People have been asking what the marks on my bum cheeks are."
"EW...FERGAL DEVITT I DON'T NEED TO KNOW!" cried Becky, bashing her head on the table as the entire Plastic table in Iowa howled with laughter.
"Oh Fifty Shades Of Wade. I like it," Dean chimed in.
"So spill the tea Codes," Finn persisted.
"Well," Cody said, leaning forward, "You know CesarHo has been trying to get TJ? Turns out that's not the only married man he's after. Well. He's already effed this one."
"If you say Hunter I am resigning," Finn pouted.
"Nope. But this guy is on TV and also a backstage official. Noble. What a fucking mess, huh?"
Both Finn and Becky's jaws hit the floor. And then both took huge gulps of the pints of Guinness they were drinking.
"I need to be there like yesterday," Finn said, "The opportunity to come for his wig is just too much right now. I just can't."
"Stop talking like a Tumblr teen!" Becky said incredulously, "You're 33!"
"Welcome to my life Bex," Paige lamented, "How's Samuel. Is he not keeping that one (she pointed at Finn) on a tight lead?"
"Nope," Becky sighed, "It's like having two hyped-up kids at training every day."
"Where's Stuart anyway?" Finn asked.
"I dunno, he's your boyfriend," Cody said, "Bitch I need you here to help me drag CesarHo some more."
"Depends how hung over I'll be tomorrow, Guinness is on three for five dollars here tonight...the soda bread and Irish stew is off the chain too."
"Where are you anyway?" asked Cody.
"Kingsland Road," Becky put in, "Well we must go. It's Fergal's round. And I've just had Sami text me to tell him to get his arse off Facetime as he wants to chat to his bestie."
"Tell Sami to get his lazy ass off Adrian's dick and join you!" Cody said, "That's an order Finn."
"I will don't you worry girl," Finn grinned, "Maybe see you tomorrow for dragging."
"I'll square it with Dad. Hehehehe. Sure they can cope without you for a couple of days. A man of your talent doesn't need much time in developmental anyway. Hehehehehe. They'll just have to have less eye candy for a few days. Tell Sami I miss him muchly. Byeeee. Mwah!"
He waved cutely before passing the iPad around the table once more, before finally hanging up.
"He can't keep coming on the road," Curtis sighed.
"Why? He's awesome as fuck," Dean said.
"Not to mention fit," Paige smirked, "Even if he is a naughty boy and bad influence on Little Cody."
"KHEEEEEEEEEEEE." Cody hissed at her.
A shadow fell across their table.
"Alright lads," Wade Barrett said, "And lass. Listen...um...you heard from Fergal at all? Tried ringing him and couldn't get an answer..."
"Cos he was Facetiming his crony here," Paige said, "And sorry Wade love, you're next in the queue behind Samuel."
"Oh bloody hell there was me thinking I'd pissed him off," Wade complained, "He's only my bloody fella. Sure girley time can wait."
"Aren't we possessive?" Cody grinned, "So Wade. When yo gonna put a ring on it?"
"Steady on mate, we've only been going out a few months," Wade chuckled.
"What kind of ring though?" Dean added, "He told us you went Christian Grey on his ass...literally.. with your belt buckle."
"Oh bloody hellfire..." Wade went scarlet, "He's got such a gob on him..."
"And you lurve him," Paige teased.
"Oh put a sock in it," Wade huffed.
"By the way Wade, just to let you know, no fapping tonight because your girlfriend is on his way to Smackdown tomorrow," Cody smirked.
"Oh..." Wade went just a touch red in the cheeks, "Actually...um...Cody. Mate. I need a word."
Cody guessed he knew what this was about.
"Sure."
He climbed out of his seat and followed the tall Brit out of Catering into a side room.
"I know what you want," he said, "I can assure you now. Nada. Bupkis. Zero. We're just really close friends. You know how I am with my close friends."
"Yeah, the last best mate you had is now your fella," Wade remarked, in reference to Josh.
"Wade. I'm not interested in Finn. He's pretty, talented and got abs to die for. But nope. Anyway. He's a bottom. Besides, he only has eyes for you. He fucking sent Sasha a photo of you two banging."
"He did WHAT?!" Wade spluttered.
"Gonna have to keep him under control. Maybe one belting sesh isn't enough?" grinned Cody.
"I can't fucking believe he told you all about that too..."
"He's just like me. Likes to keep everyone informed."
"Actually Codeman, I wanted to ask about Cesarogate."
"Oh. THAT." spat Cody.
"What did you actually do to him. Did you know Cesaro lamped me one that week when he came back?"
"No..." Cody shifted guiltily, "I didn't...sorry..."
"I don't want to keep picking the bloody pieces up...I sorted my shit out with him.."
"Shouldn't you be talking about it with Finn?"
"I will tomorrow. But what did you actually do to Cesaro, man?"
"Finn put itching powder in his trunks. And then we dragged him in the showers."
"Oh bloody hell..." Wade facepalmed, "What have I gotten myself into..."
"Wade, it's nothing you've done...he's intense, you even said so yourself," Cody said, "Come on...he's a sweetheart, legit one of the best in the world, and that body should be insured for a billion bucks. You won't meet another Finn in your life time."
"I don't think I can handle this one, let alone another," confessed Wade, "I love him, I mean, really I do...but it's not been that long.."
"Would you marry him?" asked Cody.
Wade wandered around the room for a few moments, thinking this over. Yes, he did really like Finn a lot. Definitely loved him. He was a handful but Wade was a tough bloke and could cope with that. Kept him on his toes and kept the old sex life seriously high-voltage. Finn had LOVED being punished that night when they'd recreated 50 Shades Of Grey.
And there was the potential of Finn being entered in the Andre The Giant Battle Royal at Mania. Depending on the outcome of this tournament.
Yeah.
Wade would probably love marrying Finn. Finn did have his manly side too. Football, beer. And he was fiercely devoted to his large family too. Doted on his nieces and nephews. Wade had been told that he was going to be formally introduced soon. Maybe he'll ask Finn's father's permission...
"Yeah," he said aloud.
"AWWWWWWWWWWWW!" squealed Cody, grinning for ear to ear, "You should do it properly, ,mind. Finn;'s very close to his Dad who's probably very old fashioned and most likely Catholic. Ask him for permission to have his son's hand in marriage."
"And why is it down to me?" asked Wade curiously.
"Because you are older and the top, which makes you the man," grinned Cody, "Top must propose to the bottom. It's the law."
"In your weird-arse world maybe," smirked Wade, "But you're right. Gotta do it properly. Can't imagine being with anyone else...maybe I will. Should meet the family first."
"Your capacity for alcohol will fit you right in," beamed Cody.
"I'll tell him you said that," Wade was really smirking now. Full-on Bad News.
"No no..." Cody backpedalled hurriedly, "It's fine! Really!"
"Are you scared mate?" teased Wade, "What ya scared of?"
"Wade, please don't take this the wrong way, but I am scared of Finn a little. I mean, he's a great friend, we've gotten so close but...he's a real bad bitch. If I got on his wrong side, I'd be burned to the ground."
"Taste of your own medicine mate, people have said that about you before now," Wade said, slapping Cody on the back.
WHich actually, couldn't be truer. Cody had built up this reputation as the Baddest Bitch In Town, the Queen Bee, the Alpha Bitch, Regina George. You did not want to get on his wrong side, especially in his rookie years. He was a remorseless bitch who took no pity but let his targets have it with four barrels. Even when he and Josh ruled the roost back in the Bob Holly, Priceless, Legacy, Dashing and un-Dashing days, Cody knew that he had this power, even over Josh. Cody often used to even sass and scalp Josh when he was really bored back then, or had no other targets, simply to keep him in line. Wow. Looking back Cody realised just what a loathsome little bitch he was not too long ago. And now Finn had usurped his position. He'd met his match and more in the Irishman.
"You're right," he admitted, "I legit would fear for your life, if, ever, you found temptation elsewhere.."
"I don't think so, most blokes would be a downgrade," Wade said, "And yeah. He told me that if I cheated on him, ever...my bollocks would come off. And that was just for starters. I think he'd mess me up good and proper. Wow, that's bloody cheerful innit?"
"It's cos he loves you," Cody said.
"I know, I know."
"So propose. Next stop, kids. He's definitely a kids sort of guy."
"I know, he talks about his nieces a lot. You're going soft in your old age, Codeman."
"Well all I want is to be Cody Runnels-Lomberger. Ew that sounds coarse. Or just be married to a Joshua Runnels. He deserves the surname more than anyone except Brandi."
"Good save there fella," chuckled Wade, "Bless ya. Why don't you pop it."
"I can't. I'm not a Mormon and not a bigamist. A promise ring is the best we can have. You're lucky. Curtis is lucky. Sami's lucky."
"Are Neville and Zayn engaged?"
"Not yet. Anyhoo, you should call your boyo. Before he scalps YOU. Hehehehe."
"Fergal wouldn't dare."
"Try him," giggled Cody, "Unless you value your ballsack."
"I do actually. And anyway, if he tries his bitchiness on me, I won't shag him."
"You couldn't hold out!" scoffed Cody.
"I'll just wank instead. Kinda like this knife-edge stuff. Don;'t think I've ever been with a fella who keeps me on my toes. Thanks mate, good to talk to ya. Please keep this to yourself."
Cody offered his pinky.
Wade scoffed and rolled his eyes. Such a bloody little kid. But whatever. He gruffly shook the cute ravenette's pinky finger.
"That's legally bound," Cody said, "If I break that, you can bust me open with whatever weapon you feel like during the ladder match."
"Consider it done."
Wade left the room.
Cody was left feeling a little pensive.
Well, this was The Finn Balor Show, wasn't it? I'm sorry! It just ended up that way. I love writing him. He's definitely a fully-fledged leading cast member now! I'm not going to move along the SHeasaro quagmire until Sheamus actually returns. I have plans for it!
The 'dragging of Zahra' happened off-screen with insults too disgusting to even write. Haha. Basically just use your imagination of how they scalped her!
Awwwww Wade's a big softie ;)
So what's gonna happen to poor old (HAHAHAAHA!) Cesaro now? Is Jamie Noble going to go Zack Ryder on his ass? And will he keep his philandering from Sheamus? From the reviews I got it seemed like it was a green light to have the Plastics drag Cesaro from one end to the other. Did they go too far? You decide!
BTW I am a legit Cesaro fan, both of his hot looks and his wrestling. EVen though he's been bashed so much of late here!