A/N: Thank you soo much for the encouraging words you all shared with me in your reviews, it certainly made me even more decided to continue this, and not just for my own happiness that I get from writing but for you guys too. As always, I hope you enjoy!

Chapter 3

The Party

I am squeezing Peeta's hand with all my might as we step closer to the reception that I can just imagine already. There will be way too much food for everyone to eat and I won't get a breathing second to myself. And I am already dreading Gale taking Peeta up on his offer.

The doors burst open to reveal an enormous hall of some kind I have never been to before. The ceiling is very tall and everything is decorated in flowers and colors and other things I can't make out, there's so many things hanging from the walls that it's all a blur. At the end I see dozens of tables full of all kinds of different appetizers and there's people already eating and drinking. The second everyone realizes we have arrived they all rush to us, to hug us, and congratulate us and wish us the best and Peeta's hand is the only thing keeping me in place, keeping me from running at full speed out of here. I squeeze it harder by the second and I can't relax it. I really hope his hand will be ok.

Finally Effie manages to make her way through everyone after endless "excuse me's" and "pardon me's" and guides us to a table in a stage like part of the ball room where we will sit throughout the night and eat and for now wait until all the guests have accommodated themselves so Peeta and I can have our first dance together as husband and wife.

Husband and wife. Still seems like such foreign terms. I steal a glance at the boy with the bread sitting next to me deep in thought. I see the beautiful silver band on his ring finger and inside I know are our names engraved, intertwined together by a heart. I look at my hand and examine how my ring looks. I feel as I was staring at some other girl's hands. Those perfectly shaped nails and soft skin with the diamond ring cannot belong to the hunter who vowed never to get married.

I take a look at Peeta again and imagine how it must feel to have the girl you love agree to marry you for so many reasons except the one that you want, because she loves you.

It's not that I don't care about Peeta. I do, very much. But every time I let myself feel attached to him I get scared because it's someone else I need to worry about not losing. But then again, it's kind of too late for that. Whatever there is between Peeta and I... it won't just go away no more than my love for my mother, Prim, or even Gale. It goes far beyond a fake marriage and it's sickening because it hurts Peeta. It hurts him because it is not enough for him.

It seems like no matter what I do, I end up hurting somebody. I kiss Peeta and Gale is mad at me. I kiss Gale and Peeta... well, he doesn't get mad because he's that kind but I know I am hurting him. I kiss neither and they're both still unhappy. So what can I do?

But before I can figure this out it's time for Peeta and I to dance. Everyone has sat down and is watching expectantly. Great, I get to dance in front of half the capitol. I relax as I feel Peeta gently take my hand and guide me towards the middle of the dance floor. I will just let him lead as always.

The music comes on and it's slow and I am thankful we won't have to do more than step in place and slowly make a circle and maybe do a twirl here and there.

I am putting one hand on Peeta's shoulder and the other one in his but he doesn't take it. I am slightly confused until I feel both his hands wrap themselves around my waist and feel his cheek against mine.

Oh! Right, we're married. We'll be expected to dance this way on our first dance. I place both arms on his shoulders and lightly hug his neck and allow myself to fall in step to the slow love song and I wonder who picked it out.

I feel everyone's eyes on me and start tensing when I hear Peeta's soft whisper in my ear.

"How are you holding up?" he asks me.

His words are kind and concerned. He must sense my discomfort. I want to say it's everyone's eyes on me as I dance that makes me uneasy but deep inside I know I don't care about that. I've been on TV several times now and spoken to bigger crowds before even if I have done a mediocre job.

I have kissed Peeta countless times for the cameras and we've even shared a bed before in the interest of not being alone and keeping the nightmares away and you would think that holding him this close as we listen to a love song, feeling his warm breathing on my naked shoulder, having his hands possessively hold my waist, almost large enough to meet around it, hearing his heartbeat as my head rests on his chest without my permission, none of this should feel as intimate as it does. It shouldn't make me lose my composure as it is.

And so it takes me a second to order my lips to answer his question and even when they do open all that comes out is a nervous sigh.

He needs no words. He laughs almost as if he already knew what my answer would be.

"Just keep it up. You're doing great" he encourages me and he pulls me a little bit closer.

Doing great? At what? At not scowling? At not running away? At faking being in love?

I have to catch my breath because I was already having a hard enough time handling everything else without the added closeness. Our bodies are almost touching, only slightly brushing against each other occasionally as we move. He gently twirls me now and we fall back into the same position naturally.

Oh, how the capitol must be eating this up.

At some point, the music has stopped and so did we but we didn't move from our spot. Everything is quiet and we are just standing there. What are we supposed to do now? Everyone stares apparently waiting for something. Peeta as always saves the day. He takes a small step away and takes my chin in his hand and slowly brings my face to look up at his. His blue eyes shine against the navy blue ceiling and look like two lone stars against the night sky. They just look into mine and I become confused as I wonder where that last thought came from. He slowly leans down and I close my eyes and ready my lips to kiss him but his lips never meet mine. I feel their warmth meet my left cheek. I open my eyes and give him a confused look. What is he doing? We're supposed to be married and crazy in love. Why didn't he kiss my lips? His head positions in front of mine and I wait for the kiss that never comes. Instead he kisses my right cheek now and then my forehead and he's exasperating me. What is he doing? His head comes down again and I am sure he is going to kiss me for real now but he lands a light tender kiss on my nose. I lose all patience and grab his neck and pull him down and crush my lips against his in fury. Whatever he was trying to do I had no patience for. I already felt awkward enough. I pull away and I can see shock and amusement in his face but before I can wonder what is going through his head our audience erupts in cheers and whistles and I am brought back to reality.

I smile and blush for everyone to see what love crazy bride I am.

Then another song starts and other couples join the floor. At this point I am not sure what the protocol is. Do we sit? Do we keep dancing? Then I see his witch of a mother approach us and steal Peeta for a dance. She was probably told to do so. I can't imagine Peeta's mother wanting to do that out of her own love for him or something.

A pang hits my stomach as I realize this is the moment when the bride's father comes up and dances with her too. I look around me expecting to see Effie coming my way to guide me to do whatever it is fatherless brides do but all I see is Peeta giving me a pained look as he must know what is going through my mind. Then I am surprised to see Gale making his way through the dancing couples to meet me and starts dancing with me. I guess being the closest male family I have he must have been appointed to dance this dance with me. I can't imagine Effie forgetting such a detail as arranging what I'd be doing while Peeta dances with his mother. Or maybe he just took Peeta's advice.

His features look similar to how they did at the ceremony, hard and unforgiving.

"So much for never getting married, huh?" he asks me. I feel a little insulted at his question. He's never fully believed this is all an act.

"Tell me about it" I snap right back.

"This must be so hard for you" he continues.

"You know I had no choice" I say looking into his eyes. He must know I'm being honest. How can he not believe me? Isn't he still my best friend?

"There's always a choice. None of this would have happened if you had run away with me" he says looking down.

"You know I couldn't have. Who would have volunteered for Prim at the reaping? I could have never left my mother and sister and you know you would have never left your family behind either" I tell him. He's being childish and unreasonable. Why is he bringing this up? What's the point?

"They could have come with us. They would have" he replies.

"And what would have happened when the winter came huh? And how do you know the Peacekeepers wouldn't have come after us? Or that we would never get attacked by the bears and the wolves when we got so deep in the forest? It was dangerous Gale and you know it. That is why we never did it" I say wanting to end this conversation right now. This isn't the time or place and it's pointless anyways.

He says nothing for a minute then adds.

"At least you wouldn't be married to that little bread boy" he says with so much disdain and scorn and loathing, that it angers me.

"That boy has saved my life and my family" I tell him. He isn't being fair to Peeta.

"Oh, so now you're defending him?" he asks.

"What? What is with you, Gale?" I ask a little hurt. Why is he being like this? "None of what has happened has been my decision. It's an act and you know it" I whisper. Isn't it clear?

He laughs then shakes his head.

"You've never been that good of an actress" is all he says and his words hang in the air. What did he mean? I'm afraid to ask.

I am so mad and confused at all the things that he is throwing in my face that I want him gone and it must show on my face because almost instantly Haymitch appears and claims me.

Gale gives me one last disappointed look and walks away.

"You ok, sweetheart?" he asks me.

"Yeah, just... sometimes Gale gets... I don't know" I answer and I really don't know what has gotten into Gale lately. It's like he doesn't trust me anymore.

"Jealous?" Haymtich asks.

"I don't know. He shouldn't be. He knows how things are, how they always have been" I explain.

"He'll get over it" Haymitch offers. "He's a guy"

"You don't know him... He's never been like this to me".

"Then he isn't who you thought he really was, sweetheart. If he is truly your best friend, this shouldn't get in the way of that" he tells me and I am surprised by his words. He has a point. A really good one. I know Gale. He will get over it and be fine with everything.

Then as if Haymitch saying one insightful thing during the whole evening wasn't surprising enough, he says a second.

"It's never stopped Peeta before, has it?" he asks me and eyes me curiously with a smirk.

This stops me on my tracks. He's right. Peeta has never stopped looking out for me before because, well, because he truly cares about me. And Gale has been my friend for longer. So I should have nothing to worry about. This will pass. I am convinced he will come apologize and settle things before the end of the evening.

"I told you, you could do much worse" he reminds me.

And I remember District 11 when Peeta promised Rue and Thresh's families one month of our winnings for the rest of their lives. And I remember looking at him and thinking, not only could I do worse, but I doubt I could do better.

And as the dance ends Haymitch walks away without another word and Peeta joins me and leads me away to our table, already knowing how my feet hurt from three dances in a row in heels.

He pulls out my chair and I occupy it. I look at him and smile gratefully. His affectionate eyes say 'you're welcome' and I can't help compare how I felt fifteen minutes ago when I was sitting in this very same chair and how very different I feel now.

A/N: So? What did you think? Tell me please! Please tell me what you think! :) At least leave a smiley face or a thumbs up, anything to tell me if you liked it or not would be appreciated.