Letters to Downton

by Rome Classified

The correspondence of the inhabitants of Downton Abbey is an intriguing one; defined by lost notes on a bedside table, unsent letters, and scribbled romances on the back of an old receipt. The development of both the servants and the nobility is strengthened through their own words, written whole-heartedly to one another.

3. Chapter 3

Dear Carson,

Though we are old, I have grown to love that tire belly of yours (no offence) and those multiple chins you keep as pets under your soft, meaty lower lip.

My fingernails are trembling but I didn't know they could... Oh no! They're turning purple! I'm going to the hospital to get them removed. Brb.

I'm back! Thanks for catching me when I almost fell down the stairs at the hospital. They amputated my uvula because it was causing too much trouble with my balance.

Anywho, your moobs make my face turn green because they don't have nipples. That's weird, are you an alien or something?

Yesterday, when I checked you out, you gave me a strange look. Did that mean to rape you or to back off because I accidentally rapped you. There was stuff everywhere so I made Daisy clean it up. Gtg!

Love,

Hugs 3

P.S. Sizzle