Another chapter, coming right up! This is it for rising action, mates. Gear up.

Chapter 17: A Theoretical Finality

"That was a great catch, Snowpaw," said Skypaw supportively. The white apprentice placed said good catch – a plump vole – on the fresh-kill pile before looking up at her happily.

"Thank you, Skypaw!" she said happily. Skypaw smiled at her. She liked Snowpaw, and her sister, too. They were good fellow apprentices – not quite as good as Stealthstep and Dustfur and the others, but good all the same. Then Skypaw's eyes got big, and Skypaw turned around at the sound of her name.

It was Greyheart.

"Hey," he said hollowly, and Skypaw's heart stopped. "We need to talk."

"About what?" said Skypaw, but she followed him anyways. Greyheart only turned to look at her when they were standing in their own personal corner of camp, near the fallen rock that crushed the former apprentices' den. Skypaw swallowed, not knowing what to say.

Full of purpose, Skypaw marched up to Greyheart.

"Hello," he said cheerfully.

"Greyheart, we need to talk," said Skypaw. She took a glance at a skeptical Bluemoon. "Alone, preferably."

"Right, sure," said Greyheart, and he followed her. "What have I done wrong?"

"It's not what you've done wrong," said Skypaw. She had to keep this short, or she would lose her composure. Focusing on how her littermates felt instead of how she felt, Skypaw stared Greyheart in the eye. His blue, blue eyes that had always been focused on her. "Look, Greyheart…"

"Skypaw, what's this about?" he said.

"I don't love you," said Skypaw. He was silent. "And I have other things to concern myself with right now, so…that's that."

Having no idea what she could say that would redeem herself, Skypaw turned around and sped away, trying to ignore the gap in her heart that she could already feel.

"Bluemoon doesn't think I should be talking to you," said Greyheart.

"Then why are you?" asked Skypaw.

"Because Dustfur and Mouseclaw asked me to," said Greyheart. Skypaw blinked twice. Dustfur? And…Mouseclaw? "Willowpaw and Birdpaw are angry with you."

"So?" said Skypaw. She felt a flare of heat in her chest at the thought of her littermates. "It doesn't matter if they're angry with me or not."

"And at this point, you have more enemies than friends," said Greyheart harshly. "Because ever since…ever since we last spoke, you've been mean. To everyone."

Mean. The accusation struck her between the eyes, and Skypaw stood there, trying to breathe normally. She wasn't mean! How could they think that of her? She was doing her best to save them all, and no one was realizing it! No one gave her the credit she deserved, because they were all too stupid to see that there was work to be done! Greyheart of all cats would understand that, if she could just say so in a calm and even voice.

"I assure you, the two events have nothing to do with one another," she said instead. Greyheart's hurt frown stung. "I didn't mean to say that."

"Then why did you?" asked Greyheart. Skypaw didn't know how to answer the question. "Look, I'm not going to hold you accountable for saying you don't love me. I'm not going to blame you for any of that, because I would rather you be honest with me than lead me on. But Willowpaw and Littlepaw and the others are my friends, and you're bullying them, and I think it's high time that stopped."

He said all of this in a firm, but not angry voice. All Skypaw could do was stare at him and admire that trait. The fact that he could have this conversation with her, the fact that he was doing this for his friends, the fact that he hadn't once raised his voice…

"Why are you accusing me all of a sudden?" said Skypaw. Why couldn't she be more like him?

"Please stop being defensive," said Greyheart quietly. She paused, taking a second to formulate a response.

"I don't know how," she said at last. It took a while to choke out the words, but then she breathed easier, having said them. "Are you happy now? I don't know how."

"I know," said Greyheart softly. He gave a sad smile. "Does what I'm saying make sense, Skypaw?"

"Yes," said Skypaw. It made way too much sense. She had done nothing but push Willowpaw away, and every time she tried to bring Willowpaw in and get her on their side, Willowpaw had resisted even more strongly. And Birdpaw was just overall temperamental and difficult to reason with – she was far more stubborn than Willowpaw herself. Mountainpaw stood there and let ideas bounce off of him, and Skypaw was fairly sure that he hadn't even processed anything she had said in the past moon. As for Littlepaw, well, Skypaw didn't know where his thoughts were going anymore. He was all over the place. Every time Skypaw tried to bring them back together and put them in line, she was resisted. If they continued to resist her, she would be the only one doing things, and that wouldn't last.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" said Greyheart. "You're upset about something."

"I can handle my own problems," said Skypaw instinctively. She had no choice on that matter. Yes, she was upset about the way her siblings fought and kept things from each other, relentlessly trusting in other cats instead of each other. Yes, she was angry about how the earthquakes rendered them all useless and how she had so far failed to come up with a solution. Yes, she was sad that she had lost Greyheart and everyone else over this prophecy, but being sad about it wasn't going to do anything. And there were so many options, so many places to turn to, so many thoughts running through her head from every angle. It was like she knew everything at once, and that was too much for one cat to process.

"Look," said Skypaw. "I am…having a difficult time sorting out my priorities."

"I can see that," said Greyheart calmly. She tried to glare, but his eyes were so calm and hollow that it was hard to be upset. "Might I suggest something to you?"

"You might," said Skypaw. "I don't know what good your ideas will be." She hadn't meant to add that last bit on, either. A good, wonderful cat like Greyheart didn't deserve it, but she was too tired and weary to try and make him forget her horridness. What good would it do anyways? She couldn't trust him, couldn't love him, couldn't have him. There wasn't space for that in her life.

"I would suggest that you think about your priorities in the respect of how they would affect other cats," said Greyheart. "I believe that you are trying to do a good thing, but in trying to do a good thing, I think you've also done a pawful of bad things."

"I wish everyone could understand that," said Skypaw. Greyheart offered up another sorry smile.

"I find it's easier to make people understand and work with you if you are willing to work with them," he said. "If there's anything I could do to help, let me know, okay?"

"There won't be," said Skypaw. That, she had meant to say.

XXXXX

Willing to work with Willowpaw and Birdpaw? If it would get things done, maybe her pride was a worthy sacrifice. She had already given up her reputation, so why not?

"Willowpaw?" Willowpaw would be easier, so long as Skypaw didn't raise her voice. That often proved difficult.

"Hello, Skypaw!" Willowpaw was sitting with Mouseclaw. Great. Already, the young warrior was staring at Skypaw with suspicion. "What's the matter?"

"I wanted to know if you had a few moments to talk," said Skypaw. "It's about that…time you ran off."

Willowpaw's eyes filled with suspicion, and Mouseclaw looked up, suddenly on edge.

"You can say whatever you have to say with Mouseclaw here," Willowpaw said carefully. "He was there, too."

That cut their conversation topics in half. Sighing, Skypaw bit her tongue to stop herself from saying anything that could potentially ruin the conversation. This was part of that compromising thing Greyheart had been talking about. She didn't like Mouseclaw, not least because he was Willowpaw's mentor as well as her…friend.

"I was thinking about it," said Skypaw bravely. "And I realized that part of the reason that you couldn't tell us what you were really worried about was me. I shouldn't have raised my voice at you, and I apologize for that."

"Wow, Skypaw apologizing?" said Mouseclaw. Skypaw and Willowpaw glared at him, but Mouseclaw was still interested in torturing Skypaw a little more. "I don't expect you'll apologize for giving Willowpaw so much grief where I'm concerned, then."

"No, I'm still of the same opinion on that matter," said Skypaw viciously.

"Will you two stop?" said Willowpaw. She sighed, resting her head on her paws. "I have enough to worry about without you arguing about my best interests."

"I just want to help," said Skypaw. "You're not doing a good job of keeping yourself on task, that's all."

"On task?" said Mouseclaw. "If I didn't know better, Skypaw, I would say that you think that I'm a distraction. Me, the one teaching her to become a warrior."

"Who says you do know better?" said Skypaw. Mouseclaw narrowed his eyes.

"Stop," said Willowpaw. "I'm the one who looks out for my best interests, thank you very much." She sat up, staring at a now-appeased Skypaw and Mouseclaw. "Mouseclaw, you need to calm down. Skypaw, can we talk a second?"

"Now you want to drive me away?" said Mouseclaw, but he scuttled off anyways. Willowpaw turned to Skypaw, looking oddly patient. Skypaw didn't like being looked at as if she was the mischievous kit.

"I know you don't like Mouseclaw," said Willowpaw. "Maybe that's because he's Mouseclaw, but I think it's because he's the cat I've chosen."

"You chose him?" said Skypaw. "I think you mean that he and Brackenheart fought, and Mouseclaw won." Willowpaw glared. "All the same, you did choose him. I think you should be choosing the prophecy."

"I can have both," said Willowpaw. She paused. "Look, I agreed to Littlepaw's plan, didn't I?"

"Yes, you agreed," said Skypaw. "Once Littlepaw said that you wouldn't be destroying anything." Willowpaw's face fell. "I think you're using Mouseclaw as a shield."

"Maybe I am," said Willowpaw. "I think we all need a shield every now and then. Is that so wrong? It doesn't mean I don't love him. It just means – "

"What it means is that you're putting more time into something that isn't the prophecy than you can afford."

"Skypaw, you deny every single one of my thoughts about the prophecy," said Willowpaw.

"I deny all bad ideas," said Skypaw. "If you had ideas that made sense, maybe I would take them into consideration."

"You deny everything you don't want to hear," said Willowpaw crossly. "Especially now that the others agree with me instead of you. Now you're offended, and you're taking it out on me."

Skypaw stopped short. Maybe she was right.

"Fine," she said. "I'm sorry, okay?"

Willowpaw didn't rush to her side and forgive her, as Willowpaw once would have. Now she was cautious to touch, careful to step too close, afraid to trust. Skypaw thought that nothing could have ripped her and her littermates apart – had she pushed Willowpaw so far that she would never come close again?

"It's okay," said Willowpaw. "Would you just let me have Mouseclaw?"

"He isn't a possession, Willowpaw," said Skypaw. "I can't give him to you like a ball of moss."

"No," said Willowpaw. "He's someone that I have chosen to go to for help and to feel happy. I would really like to know that you won't say I'm wrong for wanting to trust someone."

"Why can't you trust one of us?" said Skypaw.

"Let's face it, Skypaw," said Willowpaw. "I love all four of you, but none of you balance me out the way Mouseclaw does."

Balance? Skypaw hadn't thought about balance. Willowpaw smiled and slid off, seeing that Skypaw had nothing else to say. Maybe there was something to Willowpaw's reasoning. If she looked closely, she could see Mouseclaw and Willowpaw in a balance. Willowpaw was innocent, easily frightened, but she needed others as much as she wanted to push them back. And Mouseclaw was stubborn, hard-to-push away, and he saw himself as a protector the same way Willowpaw saw herself as needing to be protected. Maybe they did hang in a balance. Maybe they all did.

But Skypaw couldn't…she didn't want to be dependent on someone else. She didn't want another cat to complete her – wasn't she her own, independent cat? She didn't want to have weaknesses, either. She was simply focused and smart and accepting of the fate up ahead. Maybe she got frustrated a lot. Maybe she didn't compromise well. Maybe she had a problem with letting someone else disagree with her and take control of a situation. But Mountainpaw never got frustrated, and Birdpaw was great at making compromises, and Littlepaw was spectacular at taking control of any situation while making her opinion the common one. Her littermates could sort her out.

Squaring her jaw, Skypaw decided that there was still more she had to do. Birdpaw. Birdpaw needed her apologies, too, and apologizing to Willowpaw hadn't been that hard, anyways. Skypaw made her way to the medicine den and poked her head inside.

"Birdpaw?" she called back. To her surprise, the golden medicine cat apprentice came running, green eyes bright. Upon seeing that it was Skypaw, Birdpaw stopped and hesitated. "Hey."

"What's the matter?" said Birdpaw. That's what Willowpaw had asked, too – did it seem like something was wrong with her?

"I wanted to apologize about last night," said Skypaw. "I didn't mean to say you were useless."

"It's fine, honestly," said Birdpaw a little too briskly. "You're right – I just have my fire, and it was good of Littlepaw to let me make use of it."

"You wouldn't be part of this prophecy if we didn't need you," said Skypaw. "You know that, right?"

"Skypaw, I already agreed to Littlepaw's plan," said Birdpaw, sounding fatigued. Skypaw blinked.

"What changed?" she demanded. "I didn't…"

"I talked to Dustfur a little bit," said Birdpaw. Skypaw stiffened. "Not about anything important, just about…feeling uncomfortable letting Littlepaw into my head."

"You talked to Dustfur about it?" said Skypaw wearily. Why was no one coming to her anymore? At the beginning of their apprenticeship, she had been the knowledgeable one. They all came running to her to beg for her help. What had changed?

"Dustfur is a refreshing change," said Birdpaw thoughtfully. "You're right that the five of us have to…trust each other, on some level."

"On all levels," said Skypaw, but Birdpaw ignored her.

"At the same time, though, it's nice to have someone who doesn't know," said Birdpaw. "Somebody that I know likes me because I'm me, not because I'm barely necessary in a prophecy."

"I'm sure your powers will surface soon," said Skypaw.

"I don't have any other powers, Skypaw," said Birdpaw. Her eyes were bright green and truthful, but it was an accepting kind of honesty. A brave kind, too. "But I'm okay with that." Skypaw believed her, and she had never really believed Birdpaw on that count before.

"You know we need you, no matter your powers," said Skypaw.

"Sometimes it's nice not to have to fixate on powers at all," said Birdpaw thoughtfully. "That's where Dustfur can help. The way he helps me talk out my problems…it reminds me that the problems I'm dealing with are, fundamentally, normal problems. I guess it puts me in context."

Fundamentally normal problems? How could Birdpaw say that? Dustfur, Mouseclaw…neither of them had ever dealt with a prophecy on their shoulders. Neither of them had ever been forced to reconcile other cats because the fate of the Clans rested on their ability to work together. So how could her sisters say that they could help with any sort of problems she had?

"I don't understand," she said. "I guess I've never had that before."

"You used to be friends with everyone in the apprentices' den," said Birdpaw. "I think you know that, too, and it upsets you."

Skypaw shrugged, although her sister was absolutely right.

"Everyone changed," she said. "I can't…get to them anymore."

"Maybe it isn't the others that changed," suggested Birdpaw quietly. "Maybe they are just waiting for the part of you that was okay…"

"Okay?"

"Okay loving others," said Birdpaw. She paused, shifting back and forth on her paws. "I'm sorry. Maybe it isn't my place to say these sort of things."

"I love you," said Skypaw. "And the others, too."

"And maybe more than just us, don't you think?" said Birdpaw. "I think you're capable of loving more than just four cats. If you do, you don't have to push them away. None of us mind. I don't think the prophecy will, either, seeing as it is inanimate."

"Why all the sudden advice?" said Skypaw. "I thought you were stuck mixing poultices and complaining about not having any powers."

"And we're back to that again," said Birdpaw with a sarcastic smile. "Maybe I've just realized that prophecy or no prophecy, we aren't invincible. If something happened to you, Skypaw, and we parted on bad terms, I don't know if I could live with myself."

Skypaw opened her mouth, unsure how to take this. What would she do, if the others fell off the face of the earth last night? If Birdpaw's last words to her were that she didn't feel like she belonged because of Skypaw's insensitive comment…would she be able to go on, knowing that? Willowpaw, too – Skypaw's final comment to Willowpaw would have been that she didn't believe Willowpaw's story. Littlepaw would have snapped at her. Mountainpaw would have asked her to shut up. She would have let them all slip away.

Who would mourn her, if she was the one to die? Would Bluemoon, Dustfur, Brackenheart and Stealthstep even show up? Bluemoon hated her for what she had said to Greyheart. Stealthstep was still upset with her. Brackenheart had always been Willowpaw's friend, and Dustfur was Birdpaw's friend. Would her littermates cry? Or would it just be a hollow circle of her den-mates and former den-mates sitting and not really caring, with Icecloud and Lionstar and Greyheart mourning alone…

Skypaw had never felt more alone in her life, but the thought of Greyheart mourning for her gave her a little bit of lost hope. At least there was someone who wouldn't raise his voice, no matter how loud she raised hers. At least there was someone who would see what she really meant instead of the insensitive words she said. And if she died, he would sit there, remembering that the last thing they had ever said to each other was Greyheart offering a paw to help her, and Skypaw insisting stubbornly that she didn't need help.

Oh, StarClan, she needed help. Could she really turn to anyone that wasn't her littermates, though? She had to trust them with anything, or they would never get anything done. But Greyheart had offered. Willowpaw and Birdpaw, Littlepaw and Mountainpaw…had not. Littlepaw would reason out her problems, but he would not stand for her naturally defensive position, the one she would undoubtedly fall back upon. Mountainpaw probably wouldn't even listen, because he had his head wrapped around fixing things as soon as possible. Birdpaw and Skypaw would get into a shouting match before anything was accomplished. Willowpaw, then? No…Willowpaw was too cold, and she didn't trust herself to help, anyways. She needed a shield.

Skypaw needed a shield, too, but a different kind of shield. She needed someone who would protect the cats that she had been hurting all along by keeping Skypaw contained. She needed someone who would never yell back, who would try and understand what she meant as well as what she said, who would see her side of the story, no matter how hard it was to grasp. Someone who cared to listen.

"Birdpaw," said Skypaw, looking up at her sister, who seemed to have forgotten that Skypaw was still there. "Do you really think it's alright for me to go to someone else for help?"

"Alright?" said Birdpaw with a smirk. "I think it's the best thing you can do."

"What about getting distracted from the prophecy?" said Skypaw, even though she knew she was just looking for excuses at this point. "What about being entirely focused?"

"You need a break," said Birdpaw sternly. "You're driving yourself mad. Self-loathing is Willowpaw's thing."

Birdpaw was saying everything that Skypaw had always needed to hear. She could only see her negative traits as they stared her in the face. But she was trying to do a good thing – didn't that count?

To Greyheart it did. Because to Greyheart, she counted, too.

She couldn't wait another moment. Setting a quick pace for herself, she marched out of the medicine den with only a meow of gratitude. Greyheart was talking to Bluemoon, who glared at Skypaw as she approached.

"I know you don't like me, Bluemoon, but it isn't you I need to talk to," said Skypaw dismissively. God, why did she have to sound so mean all the time? She turned to Greyheart, who looked up with sky-colored eyes. "We need to talk."

"Okay," he said. "Is this about what I said earlier?"

"Sort of," said Skypaw, leading him away from his littermate. "Earlier you said that you thought I was trying to do a good thing, but that I had done a lot of bad things in trying."

"Yes," said Greyheart.

"I think one of those bad things was pushing you away," said Skypaw. "Pushing everyone away, but especially you. I thought I had to handle things myself…that people would just keep coming to me even if I didn't let them have their own thoughts, own opinions. I feel like…like I need to handle my own problems, but I don't know if I have the tools to do that. Because I'm bossy, and I'm mean, and I don't like it when other cats tell me I'm wrong. I raise my voice too quickly."

"What's the point of this, Skypaw?" said Greyheart wistfully. "I hope you aren't fishing for compliments. I'll give them to you, but you're better than that."

"I'm not fishing for anything," said Skypaw. She took a deep breath and steadied her nerves. "I'm trying to apologize. But I'm not very good at it."

"You don't need to apologize to me," said Greyheart wearily. "Like I said, I would rather you be honest about not loving me than dishonest about loving me."

"But I think I do love you, and that's just the problem," said Skypaw. Greyheart paused. Greyheart processed. Greyheart looked a little skeptical, a little hopeful, a little gleeful, a little sad. "I know that, if I lost you, I would be devastated. I know that I'm happier and more relaxed when I'm around you. I know that I admire you, and that you have all of these traits that I don't have, and that you…balance me out, I guess.

"I don't know what it feels like, to be in love," said Skypaw. "I thought I would be moonstruck and desperate to spend time with you, and I don't know if that's how I feel or not."

"What don't you like about me?" said Greyheart. Skypaw blinked, and then she felt around for an answer. "Go on."

"You're submissive," she said. "You give in so easily, and you're so…completely into the idea that cats are one-hundred-percent good. You're so naïve, Greyheart."

"Say it like that all the time," said Greyheart with a shy smile.

"Like what?" said Skypaw.

"Like you're scolding a kit, but you really don't mind what he's done," said Greyheart. Skypaw stared at him, not entirely understanding. "You like that I'm naïve. You like that I'm submissive."

"I never said that," said Skypaw crossly.

"You like that I give up easily," said Greyheart, taking a step closer. "You especially like that even though I give up easily, I haven't given you up."

"I never said that, either," said Skypaw, but she felt very warm at the idea. He took another step towards her, and for a moment, she considered what it was to be moonstruck: if it was all heartache and dizziness or if it just felt like you wanted to be this close to the same cat forever and ever, like she did right now.

"Come on, Skypaw," said Greyheart. "It's never been about what you've said, has it?"

Why can't you be important? She hated the directions her thoughts had taken, but it was far too late for that. Why can't you be involved in this prophecy, so I could just trust you without looking back.

"What's the matter?" said Greyheart suddenly. He paused. "I've crossed a line. I've imagined all of this, and now I'm being horribly, horribly incorrect."

"Don't be so insecure," said Skypaw snappily. "You know I have a lot on my plate."

"Yes, you like being all important," said Greyheart.

"It's not just that…" said Skypaw. How could she explain? "I would like to spend more time with you. I would like to go back to being…close. I would like to let you in. I would like that very much."

"But…" urged Greyheart.

"But there are some things I have to handle," said Skypaw sadly. "And I realize now that it doesn't mean I should lie to you and push you away, but I need to…put them first."

"Go be important," said Greyheart, although his eyes were somewhat sad. "Go on, and when you realize that you have always been important to me, I'll be waiting."

"Greyheart…" said Skypaw.

"I don't mean that," said Greyheart.

"I know," said Skypaw. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," said Greyheart. "I know you have your secrets, Skypaw, and I won't force you to give them up to me. If it isn't my place, it isn't my place."

"I wish it was your place," said Skypaw. "That would make everything so much easier."

"Easier really isn't our thing, is it?" said Greyheart. He laughed bitterly. "You essentially just told me you love me, and it doesn't feel easy at all."

"You deserve easy," said Skypaw. "You should move on. Find someone easier."

"I don't want easier," said Greyheart. "But your saying so makes me feel as if I'm not being put on hold." He managed a smile. "Go become a warrior. Accomplish your mission. Then we'll talk."

Skypaw nodded. As he walked away, she wondered if love really involved desperately wanting to be with someone, or if it was just desperately wanting someone never to walk away.

Spontaneous unexpected romance! Hooray! This chapter was supposed to have a happier ending, but it didn't quite fit, so there we go. I like this chapter, though. At least far more than the previous chapter. I hope you guys can find it within you to cut Skypaw some slack :)

Next chapter is Willowpaw's. It's called End of the World. Pretty sure you can figure out where that one's going. ;) ;)

See you next time! Drop me a review or a PM and tell me what you think!

~Elsi